Sunday, September 30, 2018

Who Did Kevin Piss Off This Time?


Daria's off to solve another case in honor of the anniversary of Murder, She Wrote, which first aired on this day in 1984. I don't think Jessica Fletcher ever solved a case quite as convoluted as the one Daria dreamed in the parody episode "Murder, She Snored," but then again, who has?

Fanfic Update!
  • All's Fair, by Princess_Pasta (part 9): "No amount of pleading to the gods could stop Saturday from arriving. Daria spent her day doing what she did best: avoiding all human contact. Too bad that couldn't last forever."

  • A Creep By Any Other Name (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Then: Daria's phone rang again. Checking the caller ID, she sighed and answered it. 'I told you to stop calling me, you creep.'"

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 7): "Erin liked attending conferences. They were indoor, they were warm and the good ones were catered. The downside was she had next to nothing to do and they were boring."

  • The Great Regression (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "The house is a fairly decent white sided two story. Inside is a visibly pregnant Lindy. Lindy is now married to Jim's older brother, Chris, and they are expecting their first child. A visibly excited Chris enters the room." (Part 2)

  • Jay Lane Chapter 1, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Jay slowly enjoyed the taste of the cold beer. It went perfectly with the salty of the fries and with the greasy of the hamburger he had eaten before. Of course helping the band to load and unload the stuff from the van was tiring but it was worth it."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 27): "'Thanks for switching weekends with me, Christie.' Elizaveta said to her fellow employee at the bookstore as she was refreshing the shelves in the young adults section. 'My anya's niece is getting married this weekend.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 150): "It's a real waste of time to visit Lawndale, Maryland. Lawndale wasn't known for much of anything until Revelation Day and now it's known for the teenage DPIs that make up National Legion Chapter One."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XV: A New Era In Crossovers), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Which one is yours?' 'Oh, that's my kiddos over there--' The man pointed as two girls, one whose every facet screamed Popular and the other who screamed Freaks & Geeks - entered the high school."

Friday, September 28, 2018

Beer? Cool.


I think Jesse has (once again) gotten confused. See, today is Drink Beer Day, but Jesse has clearly allowed the beer to drink him. I feel like that's some kind of metaphor, but that might just be the beer talking.

Once you've celebrated Drink Beer Day enough, you'll be all ready for Ask a Stupid Question Day! Luckily for Kevin and Brittany, they can easily observe this one without the aid of alcohol. Mr. DeMartino might want some, though.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

An Apple a Day Keeps the QB Away!


Kevin's doing his part for Johnny Appleseed Day, although it's possible that he's just trying to find a good replacement for the Tommy Sherman Memorial Tree/Crutch. I am deeply skeptical of Kevin's farming skills, but whatever keeps him happy and occupied is fine with me.

Fanfic Update!
  • All's Fair, by Princess_Pasta (parts 7 and 8): "Daria really should've known that a simple trip to the convenience store would not go easily. She managed to wrangle up a four pack of toilet paper for her dad but she'd barely made it out of the store before she was confronted by the masses." (Part 8)

  • Aunt Daria (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Szcz (part 2): "'Which year is this cool guy at?' 'Quinn, it is a teacher. Too '60 clothes. Also he's not rich.'"

  • Bad Influence (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn and Jim have sat Tommy down in the living room for a very stern lecture. Quinn said 'Cussing out your teacher!!! What the hell!?!' Tommy said 'But Shane told me I was cool.'" (Part 3)

  • Coffee, by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "The remainder of the movie played out quicker than Daria would have preferred. As the credits rolled across the screen, Stacy sat up and stretched, letting out a long yawn. 'Excuse me,' she said, the last of the yawn working its way into her voice."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (parts 46 - 49): "The Morgendorffers returned to the motel and ate a late breakfast. Afterwards. They went back to their rooms, Helen enjoining her daughters to look around and make sure they didn't leave anything behind, and then loaded their luggage. They then checked out, strapped Veronica into her booster seat, then set off for the road that would take them to Virginia." (Part 47) (Part 48) (Part 49)

  • Tales from the Crypt: Who was Texting Me?, by xXSlasherXx (part 1): "Football practice must've been running long, because Kevin had never been this late to pick her up on date night. It was a Friday night and Kevin was two hours late. Brittany was positively livid."

  • The Temptation of Tom Sloane, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Cedars of Lawndale Mental Health Unit. Quinn is entering the visitation room. Daria is there waiting for her, sitting on a sofa. She is still wearing her straightjacket and has a vacant look on her face."

Monday, September 24, 2018

Muppets and that...that...Grunge!


Daria's only freaking us all out because she's celebrating the anniversary of Muppet creator Jim Henson's birth on this day in 1936. For extra Muppet fun, read Erin M's "The Muppet Show: Cynicism & Violence" and Mike Xeno's "D is for Daria."

Today is also the anniverary of Nirvana's Nevermind, released on this day in 1991. Without Nirvana, there would be no Mystik Spiral, and without Mystik Spiral there would be no "Icebox Woman." Wait, what was my point?

Fandom News!

Saturday, September 22, 2018

This Could Get Ugly. Even Uglier than a Misshapen Pile of Wax!


Helen and Linda are having a friendly phone conversation to wish each other a happy American Business Women's Day. Or at least it was friendly for the first few seconds. By now I'm sure it's devolved into a vicious argument over who's more successful in their field and whose daughter is more popular. The swearing and screaming will begin any moment.

If she needs any help calming down, Helen should go find that hobbit Jake gave her years ago. Not only is it very soothing, but today is also Hobbit Day and therefore very appropriate. We are sure that it's really a hobbit?

Fanfic Update!
  • All's Fair, by Princess_Pasta (part 6): "One week quickly bled into three. Daria wasn't expecting someone like Brittany to have much resolve so it was a good thing that she hadn't killed Kevin yet."

  • Aunt Daria (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Szcz (part 1): "'The parents had a boy, named uncle Fedor. He was very serious and independent. He had learned how to read 4 years old. 6 years old, he boilded soup by himself. On the whole, he was a good boy. The parents were good too.'"

  • Bad Influence (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (part 1): "Mrs. Henderson is teaching her first grade class. The students include Tommy, Timmy and Teddy Carbone along with Quinn Ruttheimer, Kevin Thompson Junior and Shane Sloan along with his two lackeys, Al and Lou. Mrs. Henderson is a dark haired woman in her thirties with thick rimmed glasses. She's drawing a math problem on the black board."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 6): "Erin walked over to Anne's desk. 'Have you been to lunch yet Anne?' 'Just a Moment', Anne replied as she typed rapidly on her computer. 'Chew on that, you electronic monster.' she instructed her computer."

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 21): "'Daria, are you doing alright?' Tom asked. He and Kevin stood over her. All of them were in the nurse's office, or at least what remained of the nurse's office as half the room appeared to have been destroyed."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (parts 25 and 26): "'I guess our pariah status still hasn't been completely revoked.' Daria deadpanned as she and Jane stopped off at their lockers." (Part 26)

  • The Temptation of Tom Sloane, by Rémi (parts 3 - 6): "Griffin household. The Fashion Club is having a meeting. Sandi is giving instructions while Stacy conscientiously takes notes. Tiffany , with vacant eyes, is looking at herself in a pocket mirror. Quinn is trying to pay attention to Sandi and to read one of her textbooks at the same time. Sandi notices this." (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)

  • Touched by Mars, by WellTemperedClavier (part 1): "The shadows of Nowruz flames danced on the curved metal wall. Or they appeared to, at least. It was the memory of holy fires, copied from the fire-capped temples of Ecbatana, and replicated in hologram. A real fire had no place on a space station, even one as large as Constitutio VII."

  • What Road Trip?, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Okay - what are you three up to?' Esra, Rossalyn and Hector - an unusual gathering by anyone's measure, Daria thought - looked up from the table they sat around as Daria walked into the Legion Academy's 'holochamber'."

Thursday, September 20, 2018

A Tennis Game to Remember


Daria is recreating--if halfheartedly--the end of the famous "Battle of the Sexes" tennis match between Billie Jean King and Bobby Riggs on this day forty-five years ago. Daria, you're going to have to up your game if you want to make Ms. Barch proud!

If that's not enough motivation, then perhaps we could promise to take her to Pizza Prince to celebrate National Pepperoni Pizza Day if she wins. Extra quart of grease and all.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, September 18, 2018

Add a Movie and a Back Seat for Extra Fun!


Daria hasn't yet decided if she's going to eat the burger or stick it in her boots and enjoy the squishy feeling around her toes, but either way she'll be celebrating National Cheeseburger Day. You can celebrate, too, if you'd like to "Burger! Get! Get burger!" I just don't recommend taking any of Skip's burgers--he's apparently got a whole system and the last thing you want to do it mess it up.

Fanfic Update!
  • All's Fair, by Princess_Pasta (part 5): "Daria seemed to blink her eyes and it was time for school again. She had already been waiting outside for several minutes by the time Kevin pulled up to the house."

  • Child Disservices (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "The outside of the house looks no different from when we last saw it eight years ago. The only thing that's different is the cars in the driveway." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Death of a Secret, by Caesar Augustus Plutarch (part 1): "Daria sat in her car watching her father through the restaurant's large plate glass window. Even with the painted lettering obscuring part of her vision she could clearly see him embrace a young woman."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 5b): "Erin arrived at Boston Products at her usual time so she was surprised to see Mr Stojoski already in his office. Going to his door she saw her flustered boss racing back and forward from desk to book shelf and back again."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (parts 23 and 24): "'I heard about your video project for Mr. O'Neill's class.' Ms. Defoe said as she lunched with two of her favorite dancers, Elizaveta and Angie. 'Timothy described as a "slice of Americana."' She laughed." (Part 24)

  • Superiors, by ST91 (part 18): "Crap! Crap! Crap! Joey thought angrily as he run to the bathroom. He had hoped to stay clean while helping his father but it didn't happen. Now he and his clothes were soiled with oil and grease."

  • The Temptation of Tom Sloane, by Rémi (parts 1 and 2): "Lawndale High. Mr. O'Neill's class. The bell is ringing. The students get ready to leave. The three J's approach Quinn has she's putting her notebook in her bag." (Part 2)

  • The Wrath of Con, by Lady Evil (part 22): "'So,' Jane asked, standing in the living room before Trent in her Pilgrim girl costume. 'How do I look?' 'Like you're about to burn someone for witchcraft.' said Trent."

Sunday, September 16, 2018

"Like David Coppertone!"


Kevin's got a few tricks up his sleeve on David Copperfield's birthday, but it's Ruttheimer the Prestidigitator who owes his act to the famous stage magician. If nothing else, Kevin is very good at making Mr. DeMartino's good mood vanish in an instant.

Today is also both Working Parents Day and National Guacamole Day, so I hope Helen and Jake don't work too hard or else they might miss the guacamole. Then again, considering what happened the last time the Morgendorffers had guacamole, that might be for the best.

Fandom News!

Friday, September 14, 2018

Donuts and Angst...a Great Combination!


If you've got the time and the sweet tooth, better swing by Do Me a Donut for National Cream-Filled Donut Day. Unless you prefer twisted little crullers, that is.

Today is also the anniversary of something that happened in Angelinhel's fanfic 9.14.04, but I'm not going to spoil it by telling you what it is if you haven't read it yet.

Fanfic Update!
  • All's Fair, by Princess_Pasta (part 4): "'Doug Thompson, 18, captain and quarterback of the Lawndale Lions, made history today as he secured the team's first championship title' It was an old newspaper article, faded from time, which Kevin now kept tacked to his bedroom wall."

  • Coffee, by Zetor (part 2j): "'Great,' Stacy said, a bright smile lighting up her face. Looking down at Daria's plate, she asked, 'Are you ready for dessert?'"

  • Iron Chef: Truth or Dare, by Princess_Pasta and JPAGC (parts 3 and 4): "Kevin was no wimp and so there was really only one choice. 'Dare'." (Part 4)

  • Is It Over Yet? (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (part 3): "Quinn, Stacy and Lindy are there to bail their guys out. As they approach the station they see Jim, Chuck, Chris, Mack, Kevin and Tony emerge from the station. They are surprised. Quinn said "Jim, we just came to bail you guys out."

  • Jay Lane, by ST91 (part 7): "When Trent Lane woke up he felt confused. He had no alarms in his room and rarely wore the wristwatch. I guess it's afternoon. Trent thought, looking out the window."

  • Superiors, by ST91 (parts 16 and 17): "'Let's go inside, hurry!' Daria said. 'Upstairs! In mom's room!' She added immediately. Still shaken by the situation, Quinn did what her sister said." (Part 17)

  • The Truth Seeker, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Visitation room. Quinn is coming in. She finds Daria sitting on a chair, wearing her usual straightjacket. This time, though, she isn't strapped to the chair. However, she is staring blankly at the ground and doesn't react to Quinn entering." (Part 15)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 149): "Jodie Landon jumped out of bed. She was 11 minutes before the alarm went off and once her eyes opened, she jumped out of bed. Even though she could not tell time exactly, she could estimate a time based on biofeedback - her body tempature, intensity of previous REM cycle, blood pressure (she was very good at guessing it and her blood pressure was usually very stable)."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "The Tank careened wildly around the corner, briefly coming up on two wheels before slamming back down."

  • The Weather On Planet Quinn, by kinkfloyd (COMPLETE!): "'Quinn,' my mother interrupts my phone conversation, 'will you go ask your sister to come down for a minute?' She's too busy to even look up from her mess of papers as she speaks to me."

Wednesday, September 12, 2018

Go, Daria! Play that Game!


Daria's taking time out from her busy writing schedule to play a little Cannibal Fragfest, but if she really wanted to celebrate National Video Games Day she'd join Ted at the VR arcade. Whether your game of choice is Pong or Grand Theft Auto, feel free to pwn some n00bs or whatever the kids are calling it these days.

Today is also one of Mr. O'Neill's favorite holidays, National Day of Encouragement. Hey, just because he sucks at it doesn't mean he doesn't enjoy it.

Fandom News!

Monday, September 10, 2018

Woof!


Happy 100th birthday to Rin Tin Tin, whose cartoon doppelganger Leary is pictured at right. Of course, like the original Leary, both dogs are now long gone, but were replaced multiple times. Yikes, that went dark fast.

Speaking of depressing, since today is TV Dinner Day you might consider eating one yourself. Jane would, except that she's saving it for Thanksgiving.

Fanfic Update!
  • All's Fair, by Princess_Pasta (parts 2 and 3): "Brittany always broke up with him first, never vice versa. Most of the time, it was for the same reasons: he'd forgotten their anniversary, he'd missed her phone calls, he'd looked at some girl for too long. In short, he was his usual oblivious self. This time, however, it was because she couldn't 'deal with him' anymore." (Part 3)

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 10): "Daria sat in the library watching the feeds from the two rescuers sent out to what she though of as 'the mysterious craft from outer space.'"

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 5): "In Erin's opinion it was ridiculously early as she parked her car in front of Michelle's house. She checked the address again and wondered how Michelle owned a house in the outer suburbs of Boston."

  • First Day on Campus, by bored engineer (COMPLETE!): "After spending several hours of her life waiting in a line in an unconditioned college bookstore, Daria's nominally limited patience has waned."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 28): "Helen and HJ got a surprise when they stepped outside their hotel the next morning. It was cold and windy. 'We'd better dress warmly,' said Helen. 'It's likely to be chilly where we're going.'"

  • Is It Over Yet?, Part II, by WildDogJJ (part 1): "Quinn, Jim and his brother, Chris are at the kitchen table having dinner. Tony, Jim and Chris' father, is with them because he just showed up and forced Jim to let him in. Tense doesn't even begin to describe how Jim and Chris are feeling. Tony immediately spits out his food."

  • Jay Lane, by ST91 (parts 4 - 6): "'Didn't I tell you to stay away from her?' Mack asked rhetorically. The cold rage clear in his voice. 'Come on Mack don't make a scene, we were just talking.'"

  • The Legion vs. Doctor Diabolical!, by Captain Marbles (COMPLETE!): "It was a hot sunny day, and Legionnaires Sandi, Quinn, Stacy, Jodie, Julia, Daria, and Karen were enjoying a quiet day hanging out at the park. All of them were dressed casually in shorts and t-shirts and sandals since none of them were expecting anything out of the ordinary."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 22): "Pinning her daughter's essay to the refrigerator door, Helen cried out triumphantly, 'There it is for all to see!' 'The Door of Honor.' Daria quipped sarcastically."

  • The Truth Seeker, by Rémi (part 12): "Dr. Calan's office. Dr. Calan is listening to Quinn with sympathy as she's pouring her heart out. Tears are escaping Quinn's eyes as she talks."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Lawndale High School Gossip Thread), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "SONIA: Like oh my gawd! Did you hear what happened? MELISSA: What Soni? SONIA: You know that one girl, Brooke?"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 148): "'And like,' Stacy said, 'the guy comes up to me with his eyes wide open and he says, incredulously, "you know who Reno Nevada is?" As if I was some kind of bimbo. And my thought was like, "Dude - there are like eleven movies, all of the novelizations, the freaking car-TOON! There are yak herders in Mongolia who know who Reno Nevada is!"'"

Saturday, September 8, 2018

There He Is....


I see Joey is surprisingly happy to be the latest contestant crowned Miss America, long after the very first pageant happened on this day in 1921. I suppose it makes sense--unlike "Daria," "Joey" is already spelled with a Y and therefore he was a shoe-in. Congratulations, Joey!

Today was also the day of the Starry Night Ball, according to Is It Fall Yet?. Tickets are still available for $5,000 a table if you'd like to--oh, you already have plans? Okay then.

Fandom News!

Thursday, September 6, 2018

You Know What to Do! Don't Wait!


Daria looks like she's celebrating Read a Book Day, but that's just a clever ruse. See, for Daria that's every day, so in reality she's failing to celebrate Fight Procrastination Day! Unless reading is the task she's refusing to put off until later, in which case I have a splitting headache already from trying to follow my own logic. Never mind; I'm going to go read a book.

Fanfic Update!
  • All's Fair, by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "Kevin Thompson knew that he was a lot of things but smart wasn't one of them."

  • Coffee, by Zetor (part 2i): "Stacy's laughter broke Daria out of her thoughts. 'Small talk is kind of hard when you've just shared something so heavy, huh?' Daria chuckled, relieved Stacy was having the same issue. 'It doesn't help that we went to high school together.'"

  • Daria's Creepy Dates, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "There was a knock at the front door. 'Daria, your date's here!' Jake called out. He quickly navigated to his camera app and started recording a video; after all, this was his kiddo's very first date, and he wanted to have a record of it forever."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 27): "Roger was still awestruck by not only meeting Albus Dumbledore, learning that Helen was The Boy Who Lived's guardian and meeting the head of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black, but he did manage to apport HJ, Helen, and himself back to the Alley."

  • Is It Over Yet?, Part I, by WildDogJJ (part 1): "Quinn and Lindy are having pizza and catching up. Lindy said 'Thanks for taking me out for pizza. What's the occasion?' Quinn said 'I just wanted some one on one girl time with someone other than Daria, Stacy or Sandi for a change. What have you been up to lately?'"

  • Jay Lane, by ST91 (parts 1 - 3): "Driiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin!!! Relentless the alarm rang, waking Jay Lane out of his sleep. Slowly and reluctantly, the 16-year-old boy opened his eyes." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 21): "'Once I got home, I parked myself under the shower and stayed there for at least an hour.' Jodie grumbled as she and Mack sat with the Barbies at their usual lunch table."

  • The Things We've Learned So Far, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Esra pulled open the uncommonly huge, washing machine-sized bag of popcorn down in the middle of the commons room as several of her fellow Legion Academy students dove in."

  • The Truth Seeker, by Rémi (part 11): "Casa Lane, Jane's room. Quinn is still flailing her arms angrily at Trent, without much result. Trent is busy protecting himself. Jane sighs. Jane : Okay, that's enough, Quinn."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 147): "'Yeahhhh!!' It was a four alarm fire, or at least you would have thought so."

Tuesday, September 4, 2018

Gosh, She Sure Looks Content Out Here, Doesn't She?


I think Ms. Barch has taken National Wildlife Day further than necessary, but since that appears to be a female deer I guess she'll be okay. I'm not sure I really want to celebrate this one, being much more of an "indoors" type person, but I suspect Mr. DeMartino has already left on another hike.

Today is also Newspaper Carrier Day, and if you think that doesn't have any connection to Daria then let me remind you of one thing: without newspaper delivery, what would Daria and Jake have silently bonded over at the dinner table? So there.

Fandom News!

Sunday, September 2, 2018

Even Worse, She'll Never Get Those Bloodstains Out of Her Clothes!


Ten years ago today, The Angst Guy created Dead Stacy Rowe Day on this very blog. It never achieved national holiday status, but judging from how badly Stacy tends to be treated in fanfic it seems to have a pretty devoted local following. So, celebrate today by thinking of new ways to make Stacy hyperventilate with fear. Go on, it'll be fun! As long as you aren't Stacy, that is.

Fanfic Update!
  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 5): "Erin checked her watch again. Twenty minutes, was twenty minutes too long to wait? She checked the name at the restaurant, again. Yes, she was in the right places, at the right time. So he was late."

  • Helen's Odyssey (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Helen is seated at her desk and looks miserable. She's alone with her thoughts.. How did I get to this? My lifelong dream of making partner has turned into a nightmare." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Superiors, by ST91 (parts 12 - 15): "Anyone who knew Robert Ramirez had only good things to say about him. Tall, handsome, muscular, kind, well-mannered. The compliments were wasted on him." (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15)

  • The Truth Seeker, by Rémi (parts 8 - 10): "Quinn and Tom are sitting together at a café. They have been talking for a while. Tom : What a story ! Hallucinogenic berries, uh ? Was your sister really trying to get rid of you?" (Part 9) (Part 10)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 146): "Sandi had been bombarded with questions regarding the first Legion dinner."

Friday, August 31, 2018

Don't Be a G-D Idiot!


The fifties versions of Jake, Andrew, and Quinn seem to be enjoying National Eat Outside Day, and I'm sure the fifties version of Daria would love to join them if someone hadn't build a barbecue pit on top of her. At the very least they could try to offer her a burger or even get her a can opener.

Today is also Love Litigating Lawyers Day, so if you need to sue someone for entombing you inside a bomb shelter, this is your lucky day!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, August 29, 2018

Smooth Criminal Prosecutor


Helen's doing a tribute to the late Michael Jackson on the anniversary of his birth in 1958, although she never struck me as the type who would be a fan. Perhaps she's just excited about all the legal troubles he had, which is always good news for lawyers?

Also on this day, in 2000, Admonisher published his essay, "A Rant About 'Evil' Tom." It touches not only on the concept of Evil Tom but also some fandom issues in general.

Fanfic Update!
  • Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 13): "Kimberly looked down at the photos spread across the dinner table and sighed. 'Honestly, Jennifer. Would it kill you to dress up for picture day?'"

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 9): "Daria emerged from inside the airlock. She pulled off her helmet and took a breath of the fresh air in the building. Sure it was created, recirculated, and constantly purified, but it was still better than breathing bottled air in the surface suit."

  • Decisions, by elainefr (COMPLETE!): "He looked at the little boy that was fast asleep in the bassinet. He's so perfect..."

  • Drawing Our Own Conclusions, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Come on. He's just another gorgeous guy, and they don't bite unless you're into that!' Tom's ears pricked up at the conversation just behind him as he sat at a table in the Legion Cafeteria, and ate a tomato seafood bisque that was almost - almost! - as good as the bisque that his mother would make."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 4): "Erin leaped out of bed. Today was going to be a good day."

  • I am not a good dad (Some Kevin Stuff), by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "He did not get her. He really didn't. As much as he tried, Kevin simply didn't get his daughter."

  • I can't think of titles anymore (Pasta's Never-Ending Ideas Thread 2), by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "Daria Morgendorffer completely disregarded the rest of the email, way too distracted by the fact that she'd actually won. She hadn't entered the contest of her own free will, no, she'd been cajoled into it by a coworker who insisted that this could be the opportunity of a lifetime."

  • Jump, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Esra walked into the cavern that was Jodie's lab. 'They said that you wanted to talk to me.'"

  • Maidzillas (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Close up of Daria and Jane sitting next to each other on the sofa. Daria: I can't beleive we're doing this. Jane: I can't believe I drove down from New York for this and we're missing Sick, Sad World." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Split the Difference (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Sania walked down the street, feeling down in the dumps. She remembered the old expression: When life gives you lemons, make lemonade."

  • Superiors, by ST91 (parts 10 and 11): "Daria was still confused by what she had done when her sister jumped at her in tears. 'Oh Daria, Daria, Daria! I was so worried! I'm sorry for saying all those horrible things about you!' Exclaimed Quinn as she flooded her sister with tears." (Part 11)

  • The Truth Seeker, by Rémi (parts 5 - 7): "Cedars of Lawndale Mental Health Unit, reception desk. Tom is approaching with Quinn in tow. Tom : Excuse me. I guess Dr. Calan must be very busy, but I hope he may be able to find a short moment between two appointments for Thomas Sloane and one of his friends. It's important." (Part 6) (Part 7)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 145): "'Mister Turco, you will sit here.' Hector sat in the indicated area. He was wearing his Legion Academy uniform."

  • The Wrath of Con, by Lady Evil (part 21): "Jane woke up Monday to her ringing phone. 'What?' she answered. It wasn't as polite as 'Hello' or as sprightly as her usual 'Yo!' but it was too early to be polite or sprightly."

Monday, August 27, 2018

Hike Away, Mr. D--You've Earned It!


Mr. DeMartino is recreating his favorite scene from Is It Fall Yet?, which aired on this day in 2000, and I won't be the one to stop him. Seriously, look at that face. Would you want to get in his way?

For those who would rather stay indoors, you can stay home and re-read the Daria Post-Movie Chat Transcript that happened right after the movie. Questions were answered! Headcanons were shattered! Fans were insulted! Just as a good Daria chat should be.

Fandom News!

Saturday, August 25, 2018

No One Likes a Show-Off, Tom


You might think that Tom's flaunting his spectacular wealth, but really he's just wishing a happy birthday to original Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? host Regis Philbin. Either that or he's trying a new strategy to make amends for his role in Daria and Jane's brief falling-out. However, since today is also Kiss and Make Up Day, I'd...stick with the cash. Kissing is what got him into this mess.

Fanfic Update!
  • An Annoying Paradise, by Resop (part 10): "Daria and nine of the other trainees sit as a group in the audience at the fashion show for guild week. 'And next, walking a dress for Stacy, Kaguchi Natsuko!'"

  • Bobbie Caller, by Meester_Lee (part 4): "Thursday evening was much like other evenings at Schloss Morgendorffer. The only difference was that Dad wasn't home; he was out with a client."

  • Coffee, by Zetor (part 2h): "'Sure,' Daria agreed, happy to have something she felt confident in to help with. While Stacy busied herself with finishing preparing the food, Daria took care of everything else."

  • Daria and Loud House Cross-over (Iron Chef: Lisa Loud or Daria Morgendorffer?), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "'Mom, Dad,' six-year old Lincoln Loud said. 'Cliff is meowing at the front door. I know I'm not supposed to let him out but he seems so desperate.'"

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 4): "Erin luxuriated in her warm bed. Revelling in the expanse of her bed she laughed 'This is my bed. There are many beds like it, but this is my bed'. Erin could not remember the rest of the original saying."

  • Superiors, by ST91 (parts 8 and 9): "It was a quiet Sunday afternoon; Anthony DeMartino, history teacher at the lawndale high, was relaxing watching a football game on TV. Not that he loved that sport, in truth it was the exact opposite. He watched it only because he hoped that one of the players would get injured." (Part 9)

  • The Truth Seeker, by Rémi (parts 2 - 4): "Quinn's hospital room. Quinn is dressed in her normal clothes and getting ready to leave. Obviously, she has regained her mobility. Helen and Jake are beaming are visibly delighted to see her in better shape. But their daughter is pouting." (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 144): "The door to Daria's apartment at Legion Tower opened and she wheeled her suitcase indoors. She had hoped to find Jane waiting for her, but Jane wasn't there. 'Jane?' Daria cried. There was no response."

Thursday, August 23, 2018

Now She's President of the "Splat" Club


Sandi's taking Ride the Wind Day a bit too literally, and I bet right now she's wishing she hadn't let Quinn pack her parachute. If she's lucky, she might wind up like Roger and find a cow to break her fall. I'm really hoping this holiday is about skydiving, anyway, because if it has anything to do with Jane's other brother then I want nothing to do with it.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Think She's Still Wearing Her Sunscreen?


Brittany's taking time out of her busy hair-twirling schedule to visit with the residents of the Better Days Retirement Home on Senior Citizen's Day. Daria may or may not be visiting Mrs. Blaine with her latest Melody Powers story, but you'd never get her to admit it.

Today is also the 140th anniversary of the American Bar Association, so Helen's going to celebrate by taking a day off from working at the law firm. Ha ha, of course she isn't.

Fanfic Update!
  • Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 12): "'Guano see some gutsy climbing? Scaling the world's tallest pile of seagull droppings, next on Sick, Sad World.' Daria rolled her eyes as she watched a pair of people climbing an enormous mound of bird droppings."

  • Creating Cute (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn is seated at the head of a huge table. Also seated there are Jim, Stacy (with Chucky next to her in a high chair), Chuck, Mack, Joey, Sandi, Lindy, Jane, Daria, Jake, Helen, Trent, Kevin, Brittany and Daryl." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 26): "Helen and HJ returned to their hotel tired and ready to sleep after a long day. Both of them slept until mid-morning, got up, ate breakfast, and then took a stroll down Charing Cross Road."

  • It really makes you sink, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Mr. O'Neill : Before we begin today, I'm very sad to annouce to all of you a tragic piece of news. Quinn Morgendorffer, who was a member of this class, was victim of an unfortunate accident while camping in the woods last week-end." (Part 3)

  • Superiors, by ST91 (part 7): "Hot, she felt terribly hot. It had been like this for days. She had stayed at home with the air conditioning turned on but now there was no food left so she had to go out."

  • The Truth Seeker, by Rémi (part 1): "Everything is dark. Then eyelids slowly open, revealing the blurred sight of a room. Several blinks of the eyes later, the room becomes less blurry."

Sunday, August 19, 2018

"Eww! This is like that movie, Angela's Ashtray."


Daria's not thrilled about National Potato Day, and can you really blame her? Knowing Helen and Jake's cooking skills, I'm not even completely certain that potato isn't raw.

Today is also the anniversary of Star Trek creator Gene Roddenberry's birth in 1921. I know there are quite a few Trek fans in our fandom, so I'm sure there will be people celebrating this one around here.

Fandom News!

Friday, August 17, 2018

Two Eyes Good, Four Eyes Better!


Daria's going to settle in with a childhood favorite on the anniversary of the publication of Animal Farm on this day in 1945. That is, she will if her fellow Grizzlies will back off on the watermelon games and horseback rides long enough for her to read it.

Also, on this day in 1997, Daria was featured in the The Chicago Tribune. It gives some interesting background into the development of the show, although Daria might take issue with her description as "Beavis and Butt-head's only female friend." Friend...is not the word I would have gone with.

Fanfic Update!
  • Bobbie Caller, by Meester_Lee (parts 2 and 3): "Daria looked out her bedroom the next morning and saw that it was raining and windy. After she got dressed and went downstairs and opened the front door, she saw that it was not only rainy and windy, but chilly, too. Daria got on the phone before breakfast and told Jane that she'd get her parents to pick her up on the way to school." (Part 3)

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (parts 24 and 25): "Albus Dumbledore's Monday was not going as he'd expected. True, he had expected to be busy. As the headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, he had expected to cope with the minutiae of running one of the foremost schools of witchcraft and wizardry in Europe, and the only such school of its size and import in Britain." (Part 25)

  • I am not a good friend, by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "Whenever Kevin saw Mack, the first thing that came to mind was the words of his dad."

  • In the woods, no one will hear her scream, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Quinn are in their tent at night. Quinn : Daria ? Daria give Quinn an interrogative look. Quinn : Do you feel weird sharing a tent ?" (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • It really makes you sink, by Rémi (part 1): "Daria's room. Daria is sitting on her bed, looking awfully depressed. She has dried tear streaks on her cheeks. She is cradling a pink baby-T in her arms and sadly looking at the yellow smiley face."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 20): "'You sure no one's home?' Angie asked as Elizaveta led her by the hand into the Morgendorffer house. 'Yes, szereto.'"

  • Superiors, by ST91 (parts 5 and 6): "General Rogers was already awake by an hour when the alarm sounded at 6:00 am. Yet he had decided to stay in bed to save his strength." (Part 6)

  • The Wrath of Con, by Lady Evil (part 20): "Danny woke up Sunday to a sound he never thought he'd ever hear. Jesse was screaming."

  • Wreckonciliation (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn is at her desk going through her mail. She frowns as she looks at it. Quinn: (Thought VO) Homemaker Magazine...mine. Hot Rod Monthly...Jim. Pre-Approved Credit...shred. Coupons at Payday...might wanna hold on to that. Phone bill." (Part 2) (Part 3)

Wednesday, August 15, 2018

Or There's Always Outlet Shopping, If You Prefer


Helen and Jake are taking a rare break for Relaxation Day, but if this wasn't actually an image from a fantasy sequence then I'm sure Helen's cell phone would be ringing at any moment to bring the good times to an end.

If relaxing isn't your thing, then you could take a road trip to Swedesville for Alternapalooza, which started on this day in 1997. There's nothing relaxing about bee stings, public humiliation, or malfunctioning vans, after all.

Fandom News!

Monday, August 13, 2018

Ooooh, Maybe I'm Amphibious!


Brittany's having a bit of a crisis right now because it's Left Hander's Day and she's not sure which hand she's supposed to use. Or she's just forgotten which one is left. Hard to tell with her. To all the people in fandom who actually are left-handed, enjoy your day! Smear all the ink you want and try to find a pair of scissors you can actually use!

Fanfic Update!
  • Bobbie Caller, by Meester_Lee (part 1): "'Class,' said Mr. DeMartino, 'we have ANOTHER student today! Would you WEL-come Ms. Bobbie Caller.'"

  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 17): "Jamie and Quinn sat in silence, as they drove to Stacy's house. The only noise was a Guys2Guys song playing on the radio. Now that Quinn was alone with Jamie, she had a million things she wanted to tell him, but the weight of their recent conversations embarrassed her too much to express her feelings."

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 8): "Tom started sizing up his wife with his eyes. He stated, 'You look amazing in that dress, Daria.' He walked over put his arms around her and kissed her neck."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 3): "Saturday morning once again found Erin standing in front of the DORA LEE COMMUNITY LIBRARY 'I'm spending all my weekends at a library', Erin thought as she entered the library she had helped create."

  • In the woods, no one will hear her scream, by Rémi (part 1): "The Morgendorffer are walking in the forest with camping gear. Daria is playing a harmonica while walking. Helen : Is she going to hurt our ears for long ? Quinn : Probably. That's her depressed tune."

  • Superiors, by ST91 (parts 2 - 4): "That morning, when the alarm rang, Daria Morgendorffer had to make an inhuman effort to turn it off." (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Turnover (Hiding in Plain Sight), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "What had infuriated President Trump most was that, in what the media sources from other nations were calling 'The Exodus',* was that all of the best people, the ones that he'd constantly insisted to voters that he would only hire to enact his programs, had fled to other nations, escaped to either the various off-world habitats or to other worlds, or had gone underground in order to become parts of the ever-growing resistance movements against the Trump Regime." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (Hiding in Plain Sight), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Jane Lane never imagined that she'd be doing spy stuff. Yes, she did it in the Legion. And yes, she had heard stories. But in terms of the actual cloak-and-dagger crap, dead drops, phony papers, etc., no, that was something else entirely."

Saturday, August 11, 2018

The Joke's On Them


It looks like Washington and Lincoln just shared a funny exchange in honor of Presidential Joke Day, but don't get too excited. It was probably just another snarky remark about Arbor Day's shoes.

Today is also the anniversary of the opening of the Mall of America, and to celebrate you could visit any repository of human greed and debasement of your choosing. Just remember that you parked in Fmossthree, okay?

Finally, it was on this day in 1999 that the episode "Just Add Water" first aired. It's kind of a middling episode, fandom opinion-wise, but we did get to learn about Mr. DeMartino's super-hilarious gambling problem and see a very dated Titanic movie reference. So there's that.

Fandom News!

Thursday, August 9, 2018

"It's a richer tone!"


Trent and Jesse are busy enjoying some Zappa in both analog and digital for Frank Zappa Day. Sadly, I think the nuance (like most things) is lost on Jesse.

While those two get out the aluminum foil, Daria will instead be celebrating Book Lover's Day by--what else?--reading a book. I might recommend Thoreau's Walden, which was published on this day in 1854. Did you know he was Jane Fonda's father in real life, too?

Fanfic Update!
  • California Screamin' (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn is driving while Jim is in the passenger seat and Storm is in the back seat. Quinn: So, which exit do we take again? Jim: 17. We take a left on Van Nuys, then a right on Ventura followed by a right on Sherman Oaks." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Cards, by tafka (COMPLETE!): "'Um, since we're like not an official club any more, I thought instead of looking at back issues of Waif, we could play a card game.' Stacy said, rummaging through her bag."

  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 16): "'Quinn! Your date is here!' Jake called across the house. 'Date? Where? I can take him!' said Jamie, looking around frantically. 'Uh...' 'Daddy, I told you,' said Quinn, coming down the stairs and putting on a light jacket, 'Jamie and I are just going out to study.'"

  • Dear Diary, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Dear diary, That tour at Middelton College turned out stranger than I thought it would."

  • A Simple Afternoon, by PrecambrianStudios (part 1): "As Jane put the finishing touches on her latest painting—a pale woman, evocative of the best Gothic revenants—Daria walked into her room and tossed her backpack onto Jane's bed before flopping face-first into her quilts. 'Shoot me. Right in the head.'"

  • Superiors, by ST91 (prologue and part 1): "The scientists had said that everything would be fine. They had assured that there would be no damage to things or people. They were wrong." (Part 1)

  • Tom Riddle's War, by Meester Lee (COMPLETE!): "Tom Riddle sat with his father and his mother and listened to the wireless. The King was giving a speech, a speech which in so many words said that the British people would band together, stand up to tyranny, defeat the Nazis, then go on to create some post-war utopia where all would live in peace and plenty."

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

"Swim, you cow! Swim!"


Jodie looks uncharacteristically serene for Esther Williams's birthday, and the way that alter ego is drawn I'm not entirely sure if Jodie is jumping into the water or rising up out of it. Either way, it's nice to see her doing something fun for once in her overworked life.

Fandom News!

Sunday, August 5, 2018

Okay, Upchuck, Now Put Some Damn Pants On!


Upchuck is about the last person any of us wants to see celebrating National Underwear Day, but there he is. On the bright side, at least he is wearing underwear. It's all in the minor blessings, really.

On a less disturbing note, today is both Friendship Day and International Forgiveness Day, which are both appropriate to Daria and Jane's relationship.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 45): "Ms. Crowe and Miss Purcell contacted Lillian a week after their first visit. Lillian was pleased that Ms. Crowe had learned enough about No-Maj customs to call ahead by telephone instead of simply apparating onto her doorstep unannounced."

  • InValidaTed (The Ted Zone), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'So what was that all about with Mr. O'Neill? Who was on the phone?' Ted turned from his locker to see Daria talking to her friend across the hall."

  • Of Microwaves and Electric Keyboards, by Souless Familliar (part 7): "Daria started moving towards the closet, where her keyboard resided, dainty and slender hands reaching towards the handle, pulling it open to reveal the keyboard, which Jane figured had seen a lot of use as the ivory keys had faded into a slightly dull colour."

  • On The Road, by elainefr (part 48): "'We need to talk.' Damn, this can't be good. Jesse muted the television and looked up at Valerie's tall form."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 19): "On seeing his adoptive daughter entering the kitchen for breakfast wearing her cheerleading uniform, Jake called out, 'Mornin' kiddo! I didn't know there was a game today?' 'No, Apa, There isn't.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen and Brother Grimace (parts 142 and 143): "The HARDLY WORKING was sailing along in the Gulf of Mexico, a beautiful sixty foot fiberglass yacht. The passengers had been invited and were for the most part trying to enjoy themselves, although most felt as if they had been dragged there." (Part 143)

Friday, August 3, 2018

Are There Ninety-Nine Bottles Of It On the Wall?


Looks like Brittany's been named Keg Queen this time, which means she's serving the drinks on International Beer Day. Either that or she's following in Ashley-Amber's footsteps as a St. Peter Girl beer model.

If you'd like something to go with your beer, today is also Grab Some Nuts Day so you should feel free to munch the nutty, nutty. I'm assuming--hoping--that the holiday refers to stuff like almonds and pecans, anyway.

Finally, today is the tenth anniversary of the episode "Write Where It Hurts," from 1998. In that episode, Daria struggled with writer's block. A struggle that many in the Daria fan community know all too well!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, August 1, 2018

No, Tiffany, That Mountain Does Not Make You Look Fat


Tiffany's celebrating National Mountain Climbing Day, but I hope she's being careful because the thinner air at that elevation might cause mental deterioration and--oh, never mind. On the bright side, if she falls off and lands on her head, there's not likely to be any serious damage.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 7): "Daria had insisted that the person to help Tom exit the hooch was going to be her. They stood in the airlock wearing their surface suits."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 3): "Erin finished typing the document, saved it and sent it to the printer. With that task complete she sat back with a contented smile. The job was going well. She was most of the way through her third week and she felt she made a Valuable Contribution."

  • Knight in shining armor, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Upchuck's car. Upchuck is driving. Daria and Quinn are huddled together at the backside. However, Daria has composed herself and put up a stoic front."

  • Return To Highland (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "There's a thin layer of snow on the ground and Christmas decorations on all the houses because it's December. Quinn and Jim are in the driveway loading their luggage into Quinn's car. They are obviously going on a road trip." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Brother Grimace and Roentgen (parts 140 and 141): "Danny stepped out of the bathroom in Quinn's apartment, dressed for the very first time in her Elite Academy uniform. 'So - what do you think?'" (Part 141)