"If you get thrown off a horse, you have to get back up and shoot it, right?"

Helen and Jake are celebrating the anniversary of the day Secretariat won the Triple Crown in 1973, but I think we all wish they'd have chosen an activity that wasn't quite so creepy. Daria and Quinn in particular are most likely fleeing the house, searching for brain bleach, or both.

Let's just hope Helen and Jake don't find out that today is also National Sex Day, although whenever they have the house to themselves they don't usually need much of an excuse. I just hope Daria doesn't get caught up in any more middle-of-the-night misunderstandings, because I don't think Jake could handle the trauma a second time.

Finally, the episode "Pinch Sitter" first aired on this day in 1997. The word of the day is "indemnification," and I hope everyone enjoys this brainworm: "I am cool and that is it, and everyone else is full of, full of, full of--"

Fanfic Update!

• Daria's Party Addition, by DrT9999 (parts 20 and 21): "It was a rather haggard-looking Daria who showed up for lunch Wednesday morning." (Part 21)