That Was Then, This Is Later

The second-season Daria episode "That Was Then, This Is Dumb" premiered 12 years ago today. Ah, those wild and crazy hippie days of yore. We learn that Jane and Jessie are NOT going to make it as a couple, that Jake and Helen haven't changed a bit since their college days, and if Jake really had managed to levitate the Pentagon, he would be that world's version of Doctor Manhattan, only not so blue and not so naked. More on this episode can be found here.

And, hey! Who is that bulldog chasing the yellow Volkswagen named JANICE? Darn right! It's the bulldog Daria almost runs over a few episodes from now, in "Through a Lens Darkly"! It's J.B. himself, or "Pugsly," his stage name. Good boy! Just seeing him almost makes me want to get a dog again. [sigh]

NEW N00Z!!!

• Medea42 shares with us her "personal rules for writing fanfic" on her blog.
• Join the discussion on The Best Of Daria Fan Fiction Community on FF.net! Is YOUR favorite story in the list?
  

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• NEW! Apocalyptic Daria: Timeline, by Doggieboy (Part 2): Hello. It’s me, again, the Chronicler. What I showed you of the events from what people now call “Twilight Friday” shows a pretty much normal Friday night for a lot of people. Such is the way of the world. Until some cataclysmic event occurs, the world goes ticking along at it’s own normal pace....
• NEW! Big Brother, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): Jane picked up the phone, tears streaming down her face. She and Jesse's discussion about wanting children had turned into a heated argument. It ended with Jesse walking out of their house, slamming the door. The last words out of his mouth chilled Jane to the bone. "Jane, I want a divorce."
• NEW! Cheery, Cheery Night, by CAP (COMPLETE!): The post-award reception was in full swing. The massive gold-colored drapes and thick crimson carpeting did absorbed but little of the loud laughter and noisy hum of hundreds of conversations. The moving mass of people made it difficult for Brittany Taylor to spot the people she was seeking. Every other person stopping her to pass on his or her congratulations for her Drama Desk win as Outstanding Featured Actress in a Play slowed her even more.
  
• The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): "Then he will fire the admissions director and replace him with someone who has a clear understanding of what sort of person a new student should be. Such a student is usually intelligent, excited about attending such an intellectually rigorous school and will, in the final analysis, do and believe what he or she is told...."
• NEW! Finn Morgendorffer 37: Mature Relationships, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 4): “So, back to the original question. Who's the lucky lady coming as your date?” “Don’t know if I’ll choose anyone. I’d love to bring you Jane. Y’know, backup and all, but, between Mom and Daria, I just see blood being spilled. Mine.” “Oh.” Jane was pretty disappointed. To be Finn’s date was not a thought that was completely unpleasant.
  
• If Ever I Fall, by TheSharpie (COMPLETE!): As Phil drove down the old highway Quinn held his hand as the song from earlier played on the radio. “Tonight was perfect, sweetie.” “Anything for you, love,” he replied. The radio played on. As they approached an intersection they heard the screeching of brakes as an SUV ran the light....
• NEW! In the Cold Summer Sun, by Malakite (Part 1): Doctor Fisk looked up from the file he was reading with a certain amount of disbelief. The man looked nervous, almost sheepish in his blue business suit. The woman tapped her foot impatiently. It was obvious she was in a hurry, the way she kept glancing down at the cell phone in her purse. Fisk still couldn't quite believe what he was going to say to these people, but then he couldn't quite believe what that plant had done to the county's water, either. It was getting harder. This was the fifth set of parents he would have this conversation with this week.
• NEW! John Lane 45: Haunted by the Past, by RLobinske (Part 2): "I might consider the proposal," Sandi said, "if your sister had a fraction of your fashion knowledge." "She knows fashion," Quinn said. "She just doesn't use it." "I bet." Quinn opened a folder and pulled out her secret weapon. An old copy of the Highland Herald. She opened it to the fashion column and said, "Look at who wrote it." Sandi read out loud, "Daria Morgendorffer." Shocked, she sat down. "Your sister wrote a fashion column?"
  
• They, by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): The morning sun through the motel window woke the young man from his slumber. He remembered the night before, how she had insisted they meet at the Rondayview Motel off Route Six for a night he would never forget. He had not noticed that she was crying when he got there, nor had he considered why she wanted to meet him there instead of them going together. That night had indeed been the best they had ever shared he thought as he opened his eyes to greet the new day. He looked to his side and saw no one next to him. (FF.net)
  
• NEW! Zero G, by SigDiff (COMPLETE!): “They can go EVA. They pull up beside us and just drift over. We'll need to have someone in the airlock with the outer door open so they can get in. Maybe a rope tied down that we can throw over. And no worries about them breathing our atmosphere, because they've got suits.” [Ending is here!]
  

Hello, and Woof Woof

Today is the eleventh anniversary of the premiere of "Through a Lens Darkly," a quest for personal identity involving manstopper glasses that helped lead off Daria's third season.

Two memorable characters appeared in this episode: Amy Barksdale and J.B., the bulldog. Yes, I know, J.B. was called "Pugsly" on the official site, but you and I know he's J.B. because he was in a story. 'Nuff said.

And Amy is Amy, no sense in going on about her. We need more pet stories, I believe. Lots more.

NEW! Pinhead is once again tearing up the art room. Click and enjoy. And check out Daria-2010.

Amusing Note: Looking for wallpaper for your 'pooter? Try the new wallpaper from the new MTV website. Kinda cute for the little bits on it. Also, I noticed there are 1,200,000+ fans registered on the main MTV Facebook site, so Daria fans account for over 20% of that total. Wow, that's a lot.

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• NEW! Daria: Hunter 5—Strictly Business, by Jim North (COMPLETE!): With a snarl of frustration Axl snapped his holo-heads back on so he could have at least one ranged sense running again. Just as his nightvision kicked in, he saw the bounty hunters descend on two of his selves. Or rather, he saw one, Janey, as she bowled into the chest of a Vexxer. The other woman landed on the back of another machine and started clawing at it with her armblades. [Ending here!] (FF.net)
• NEW! Finn Morgendorffer 34: A Few Cans of Soda, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 1): Nothing happened immediately after the football practice ended, but according to the school gossip, there had been a strange man coming in and out of Ms. Li’s office. Heh, a secret lover? Finn chuckled to himself. Wouldn’t know who in their right minds would hit that, but some guys are desperate.
  
• NEW! Folie à deux, by Charliefox2012 (Part 2): “I don’t have it. Leave my closet alone,” Daria said, grumpily. “You have to have it,” Evie said. “Quinn doesn’t have it.” Daria sighed. “What are you looking for this time?” “My red turtleneck,” Evie answered. “I don’t have it,” Daria said.
• NEW! General Semantics, Private Angst, by Gwrtheyrn (Part 14): As far as Daria could tell, there were no hidden switches, no panels, no signs or directions of any kind. She was getting interested, now. These tunnels seemed effectively endless, but their very elaboration indicated that something stupendous was down here to be found; perhaps a connection to the very galactic base of which Hrafn was commander. She'd need food and water to investigate this more thoroughly. Too bad she had to retrace two hours of walking, but better two hours than five.
• NEW! The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (Part 7): "Besides," said Tom, "I hear that Quinn Morgendorffer is as dumb as a box of hammers." "Oh Pope." It was Terry, sighing. "You'll never find a soulmate. Not until you master parthenogenesis."
  
• Into the Fray, by Minx (Part 2): “What is going on? I was asleep one minute then BANG the next thing I know I’m being pushed into the car and being told to drive.” Max's veil of machismo was gone. It was now replaced with unbridled fear that shone in his eyes.
• NEW! Invisible Love, by Charliefox2012 (Part 11): “And Ramona. Goodness, only three and already preparing for college,” Helen said, astonished. “Yeah. Poor girl,” Duncan said flippantly. “Which reminds me. Duncan, what are your plans for college?” NEWER! [More here!] (FF.net)
  
• Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: Debut, by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): “We’ll be meeting someone important in the family,” Kay Sloane said. When Elsie dug deeper for details—who the hell is it?—both of her parents clammed up. I suppose that this is where they break the big secret. The Sloane millions were founded with Nazi gold. I’ll meet my dear Aunt Eva and my Uncle Adolf. Because after all, if the Sloanes were Germans, it would make perfect sense that they would hide in Italy. Or maybe I meet my Uncle Benito. Whatever.
• NEW! Turn, Turn, Turn, by Ajar (COMPLETE!): "Damn abacus. Can't calculate the damned science rate with these damn jammed beads. God damn it!"
  
• Unnamed story ("A.U. Ficlet"), by GlitterShrooms (Part 1): “I know it’s hard to move to a new town, but I hope you both realize that we’re here for you. Mom, Dad, and I would do anything to make you two happy. You both understand that, don’t you?” “Did we move?” asked Daria Morgendorffer as she and her sister Quinn rode in the back. “Daria,” the driver continued, “I know it’s been awhile since we’ve been together like this, but I want you both to know how much I’ve missed you.” Without hesitation, Daria climbed over to turn up the radio.
• Unnamed story (More Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by DigiSim (Part 1): "Welcome to The George Underwood Edwards Institute of Technology!"
  

J.B. wishes to remind you that...

...yesterday (Sunday) was Primrose Day, in honor of Benjamin Disraeli, whom J.B. is fond of quoting. J.B. would also like to report that, contrary to rumor, his name is not really "Pugsly."

Anyone have anything they wish to discuss? Leave a note or two in Comments.

Ruff

Oops, late again. It was a ruff day. More shortly (or longly, but more).

FF.net

• Lambda, by SigDiff (Parts 17 and 18): Daria could feel herself shaking from nervousness. When she was younger, it had been a habit born out of her fear of dying. When she'd learned not to fear death anymore, it had become the fear of losing her best friend. As she had been promoted, it was compounded with the possibility that her mistakes might be the reason for that loss.

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• Antiestablishmentarian Hikers, by Lawndale Lurker (continued): “Do you have Tony DeMartino's cell phone number?” Linda asked him. “He doesn't have one,” Jake replied. “How about Ms. DeFoe?” “If she has a cell phone I don't have the number for it. What are you trying to find out?”
• Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Chapter 3, Part 1): The figure moved across the gymnasium floor, carefully avoiding the crumpled bodies of the unconscious or hallucinating students. It seemed to almost hover forward, since all body movement was hidden by a dark, flowing cloak. Few details could be made out from the grainy, black-and-white video being shown, but the subject of the film seemed to radiate a deep sense of purpose. It slipped out the door, following the insane psychiatrist who had attacked the high school dance, and the video immediately froze.
• Love Is a Series of Burning Sensations, by Undefinedlust (Part 6): Daria paced her room nervously. Looking at the clock she saw that there was still half an hour before Tom was to pick her up. "I should really take another Valium", she thought, and deciding against using what was in her purse went to her parents bathroom and took one from one of her father's bottles.
• Once Upon a Time in Lawndale, by Disco316 (Part 9): Tom rifled through the drawer in which the models had been kept. It's got to be in here somewhere. I've found the bank, the stable, the blacksmith, the saloon, the nail salon; they're all here except for the... He looked up, and that thought process ceased as he saw the station model he'd been looking for suspended in front of his face. Holding the model in place was a hand, and attached to that hand was the arm that led to the body of...
  
• Spirit Stick, by Brother Grimace (Part 2): Five minutes later, the soldier and the blonde woman stood in the back yard of the Pi Rho Omega sorority house, looking up at the impressive, three-story building. “Yeah. This is not going to be pleasant,” the woman said, holding up her right hand as the simple silver band on her ring finger began to pulse with a series of slow, steady blue flashes.
• Tales of the Ringbearers: Temporary Duty, by Richard Lobinske (Part 1): Sharon Reeve pointed to a faintly visible, man-sized shape and said, "There's your target, Gunny." As she spoke, it started to move among the buildings. "Anything else?" the man asked. "You have to make that determination yourself."
• Turnabout Confusion Part II: All The King's Horses, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): Daria sat alone on the roof, her back to one of the air conditioner vents. It was lunch hour, and the Li-stapo was gone, so she felt confident her alone time would not be interrupted, and she felt she badly needed some alone time.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Love in the Postmodern World), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): Daria flopped on the bed, exhausted and exhilarated from the events of the past forty-eight hours. Quinn had said that she would like college, that people were interesting and nice, but the reception she had received surpassed—no surpassed was not the right word because it implied there had been some set level of expectation that had been exceeded....

Trent's duck phone, and other wild beasts

The Mallard-shaped telephone that Trent uses in "Daria!" appears as a wallpaper image in one of the old MTV Daria sites. But let's go to the missing flipbooks and go through their contents.

We'll start with "Filed Kingdom" (a word-play on the old TV show Wild Kingdom, which was about animals). Here are the text lines to each of the missing but now unnecessary pix. This was actually part of the current website but was removed for unknown reasons. You may consider this "official," if you like. (You can confirm the contents by going to this URL and right-clicking on the page. The flipbook widget was archived on 20010428, meaning April 28, 2001, so it was online at that time.) Here we go! (Italics mine.)

1. CHIQUITO THE PARROT—Penny Lane returns from Costa Rica with this high-strung chatterbox in "Lane Miserables." He just might be more musical than Trent.
2. DOG WITH NINE LIVES—Daria almost runs over him with her car in "Through a Lens Darkly." His name is Pugsly and he's modeled after (Daria producer) Susie Lewis's pet bulldog.
3. POOR LITTLE MOUSE—This critter is greatly confused and greatly abused in "The Lab Brat." But he does get his revenge by biting Brittany. (She deserved it; she called him a rat!)
4. DOOMED SPIDER—A trespassing bug that causes Mr. O'Neill to refer to Daria as "Dorian" in "Café Disaffecto." It is then sentenced to be squished.
5. NASTY BEE—This annoying insect adds to Daria's humiliation in "Road Worrier." The voyeuristic squirrels weren't very nice either.
6. LEARY THE DOG—caption: Leary is the pet of holdover hippies Willow and Coyote in "That Was Then, This is Dumb." He's the second in a series of lookalike canines named after Timothy Leary, the famous guru of mind expansion.
7. SEXY POODLE—This pulchritudinous poodle appears in the first scene of "I Loathe a Parade" on an episode of Sick, Sad World. As Upchuck would say: "Rowwwrrrr!"
8. CERAMIC TIGER—He's not alive like the others, but he's greaaaaat! Quinn hides behind this oversized porcelain pussycat in "The Invitation."

This list is sure to inspire intense controversy. Why did they not talk about the squirrels, for the love of God? Why no mention of Mister Whiskers? Why no picture of Sandi's cat puking up foundation? Was the squashed spider really more important than Joanna the python? And why wasn't J.B. or Roger the Mouse given more space? ("Pugsly"? Eww.) And only EIGHT animals?

SPECIAL BONUS! An extra picture of Roger the Mouse!

More shocking revelations to come! Hold on to your joysticks!

HEY! Wasn't that Leary #3, not Leary #2?

Christmas Day Presents for All

On PPMB:

Been Here Before (Part 29), by The Sidhe

Evil Daria Vignettes III (Roger Abuse episode)

Unnamed story, Iron Chef: Merry Christmas! by SigDiff

A Yankee Marine in General Lee's Army, by The Sidhe

And a special oddball thread:

Questions for TAG (in case you have any questions)


LATE NOTE: Someone asked for a DariaWiki page on J.B., the talking bulldog from "A Hard Days' Night," and that has been done. Enjoy!