As Least Black is Slenderizing

Tiffany's digging into the deeper, darker mysteries of life for Occult Day. Such mysteries include why horizontal stripes make your butt look big, how shiny objects became shiny, and how to spell her own name. Good luck on your own search for answers!

Today is also National Vichyssoise Day, so Quinn will probably visit Chez Pierre for some cold soup. Of course, anyone who wants authentic French food should go somewhere else. Anywhere else.

Fandom News!

• Discuss potential changes to British broadband.

Mmmm, Cholesterol....

Daria and Jane are way ahead of us for National Fast Food Day. The Fashion Club will pass on eating any of that greasy food, but if we're (un)lucky then Quinn might favor us with a dramatic reading of her poem "The Greasy Fry." For a hilarious fanart take on the Fashion Club's hypothetical adventures with fast food, see S-C's brilliant Burger World.

Fanfic Update!

• Back to Highland: A Daria/Worm Crossover, by Meester_Lee (part 6): "Daria and Dusty returned to the command post shortly afterwards. She didn't see Captain Clueless. She would have dearly loved to see him gone, but with her luck, she suspected that he'd gone to the bathroom or reporting to Justice Department higher-ups."


• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 8): "'Well, I think you look adorable.' Mrs. Bennet was saying to Clarissa as they crossed the parking lot of the Zen. 'I look like a dork!' Clarissa countered."


• Edicius, by elainefr (part 16): "Daria shifted her backpack to a more comfortable position before taking a breath and heading down the road to take the long walk home from the library."


• The Engineer and the Time Lady, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "The small starship was in trouble. It had defeated the other ship, but it was out of control, entering the atmosphere of an M-Class planet at a rather steep angle. The crash landing was going to be terrible."


• The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (parts S8 - S11): "The Dalheim Studentbolig had all the amenities of a Fielding dorm, which is to say, no amenities at all. However, there were some important differences." (Part S9) (Part S10) (Part S11)


• Market Value (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Kevin, Mack, Jim, Chuck, Tony, Rev. Li, Chan and the guy with too much jewelry are seated at a conference table. At the head of the table sits a skinny red haired man in a business suit with a laptop." (Part 3)

That's a New Way to Bring Glory to Laaaawndale High!

I see that Ms. Li wasn't kidding about that brief career as a dancer, but who knew she was also a Louise Brooks impersonator for Brooks's birthday? Of course, anyone who's seen pictures of the late actress/dancer knows that Jane's the one she looks the most like.

Today is also World Diabetes Day, and I really hope Mrs. Johannsen takes the following advice seriously:

Mr. O'Neill: You know what they say, a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.

Jane: Not if you're diabetic.

Fandom News!

• Talk about Daria's cameo on Family Guy.


• J-D spotted a Daria avatar on Lenore Taylor's Twitter account.


• Watch and discuss the trailer for the new Scooby Doo movie.

Pizza and Books? Yes Please!

Ted's having a lovely National Pizza With Everything (Except Anchovies) Day, but he's clearly stunned to find out that some people actually put fish on pizza. Wait until he hears about the pineapple controversy.

Today is also Young Readers Day, and while Daria fandom is more young at heart than physically youthful, I know we have more than the usual share of readers. Crack open a book and have some milk and cookies, okay?

Fanfic Update!

• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 7): "'Jesse, you CANNOT wear that!' Jane stated. 'Why?' he asked. 'Because.... It's indecent!' Jane couldn't believe he didn't realize that. Oh wait, she could."


• The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (parts S4 - S7): "'It is time to pour the holy libation!' Larry 'Gambler' Harris and Francis 'Fitz' Pennington III were entrusted with the sacred oils, in this case a mixture of baby oil and canola." (Part S5) (Part S6) (Part S7)


• Market Value (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (part 1): "It's Thanksgiving and Jim and Kevin are standing in the driveway enjoying the cool November air. 'I love Thanksgiving,' said Kevin, 'You get to, like, totally stuff your face then burp and poop all you want. It's awesome.'"


• Nun Too Holy, by 90eyes (COMPLETE!): "Jake couldn't help but chuckle at what he was seeing. Quinn of all people had started walking around, completely dressed up in a nun's habit, for some reason."


• RelaTed (The Ted Zone), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Ted let the front door shut behind him as he walked out of the house. The fresh air felt nice and the setting sun was lovely. Even better, from outside he couldn't hear the agonized groaning of his father."

Oorah!

Sandi's showing off her new haircut in time for the anniversary of the United States Marine Corps, which was established on this day in 1775. For anyone who thinks there's no possible connection between military action and fashion, well, you've never seen Sandi and Quinn fight over a blouse at Cashman's.

On a lighter note, today is also the anniversary of the TV show Sesame Street, which first aired on this day in 1969. For an absolutely charming fanfic take on the show, see Mike Xeno's "D is for Daria."

Fandom News!

• What does Daria write? Share your theories in the thread.


• Discuss how Trump corrupted the American presidency in every imaginable way.


• J-D shares a little something for the Veronica Mars fans.

Anyone See a Herd of Beautiful Wild Ponies Running Free Across the Plains?

Daria's old school psychologist is wishing a happy birthday to Hermann Rorschach, born on this day in 1884. Rorschach is the creator of the inkblot test Daria took as a child, and later referenced in "Esteemsters." I'm not sure what he'd think of Ms. Manson's methods, but I suspect he wouldn't be a fan.

Today is also the anniversary of the births of Margaret Mitchell in 1900 and Brad--I mean, Bram Stoker in 1847. Both author's most famous works, Gone With the Wind and Dracula, were mentioned on Daria at various times.

Fanfic Update!

• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 24): "That evening, during dinner, Quinn told parents about the discussion she, Daniel and the fashion club had."


• Daria Does the DCU, by Lady Evil (part 1): "'OK, we did it.' said Daria to Jane, her lab partner. 'We combined my DNA with yours, struck it with lightning because apparently electricity can do any random thing, and we have created life. What she we call it?'"


• Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 31): "'Now you go and find us somewhere to sit.' Erin carefully weaved her way to where Trevor sat on a patch of grass near the string quartet. After distributing coffee, she sat leaning against his shoulder."


• The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (parts S1 - S3): "Clayton Arbusto could hear the crunch of the grass underneath his boots as he walked under a sky the color of dead skin. He loved the place, loved the toughness that one needed to endure it but many times he felt like an explorer on the Planet of Texas, his own mind the worst of his companions." (Part S2) (Part S3)


• Lovely Lindy (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Lindy and Lauren are in an office. Realizing that she needs an edge Lindy is turning to a sponsor. For expediency's sake she's turning to in laws, specifically Chris and Jim's uncle Vito." (Part 3)


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Lady Evil (part 2): "Jane had been looking forward to her stay in Metropolis. The restaurants and the art museums were all as great as Cousin Lois said they were."


• Winter Is Coming: A Daria/GoT Crossover, by Meester_Lee (part 14): "The doorbell rang. Daria wondered if the pizza delivery guy had come by and went to open the door. She opened it and Grandma Ruth was standing on the doorstep."

Four Score and Seven Goths Ago

Andrea is celebrating, albeit in a very stoic style, the election of Abraham Lincoln as president of the United States. I guess it's hard to feel celebratory when the personification of your holiday is a complete douchebag. Not to mention having to share a holiday with George Washington.

Fandom News!

• Talk about bands that use Daria kind of lyrics.


• Discuss Trump's offer to send the US military into Mexico to 'wage war' on drug cartels.

Walk Like an Egyptian!

Either Mr. O'Neill knows that today is King Tut Day, the anniversary of the opening of King Tut's tomb in 1922, or he and Ms. Barch are into some really weird stuff. I hope it's the first one. Jake's still staring at that cereal box, trying to work out whether or not Tut was buried without his diver.

Today is also National Candy Day, so dig into that leftover Halloween candy stash! Daria and Jane might make another wager about the comparative quantity of ZooZoo Drops versus Juicy Joes.

Fanfic Update!

• Back to Highland: A Daria/Worm Crossover, by Meester_Lee (part 5): "Daria resumed, but was interrupted by a knock on the door. A couple of state troopers walking in escorting a shackled prisoner in a Texas Department of Corrections prison uniform."


• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 6): "It was the evening of the charity ball. A crystal chandelier reflected a thousand glistening lights on the gold toned walls of the Waldorf-Astoria ballroom. Melody adjusted the telescopic vision on the Venetian mask she was wearing. She had to find the Ambassador to Elbonia before..."


• Eat your heart out, by wheresthequeef (COMPLETE!): "Jane placed the baby pink cake on the kitchen table, the small sound it made bouncing off the linoleum. 'Ta-Da!'"


• Edicius, by elainefr (part 15): "'So Brittany is paying you to make her smart?' Jane questioned Daria once Daria had told her about Brittany's visit."


• Fear Leads To Anger (Iron Chef - Halloween), by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "She was on her own. Home alone. Mummy and Daddy should have been there but they weren't."


• Fire Rescue For Fashion Club (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by psychotol (COMPLETE!): "'Nine One One, what's your emergency?'"


• Lawndale High: The Next Generation - season 1, by Peridaniel (part 5): "Philip dispassionately stared at the dessert section of the lunch line as he walked past it. Lime-green gelatin, vaguely ghost-shaped marshmallow treats, and cupcakes piled with too much orange frosting and a piece of candy corn in the center stared back at him."


• Lovely Lindy (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (part 1): "Lindy is seated at the head of a large table. The others seated there were her husband, Chris, her infant son, Jason, Chris's brother, Jim, and Jim's wife, Quinn, as well as there seven year old triplet sons, Tommy, Timmy and Teddy."


• My Pres Friend (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria waited patiently in McVicker's office for him to come in and start chewing her out. She had been a part of the assembly where she was one of the few hand-picked to ask President Clinton a question -- hers was about college, but finished with asking if he was just jerking around with the collective youth of America."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Lady Evil (COMPLETE!): "Daria came to moaning. That groggy feeling would not go away. It felt like all the blood was rushing to her head. Her vision was blurred. She didn't have her glasses."

Gimme a B! Gimme a O! Gimme a O! Gimme a K!

The Lawndale High cheerleaders are shocked to find out that cheerleading officially began on this day in 1898. That's right, cheerleading is old! Gasp! Horror!

For those not inclined toward cheering for athletes, today is also Book Lovers Day. I suspect most of Daria fandom will be celebrating this one, not to mention Daria herself.

Fandom News!

• Share lyrics similar to something Mystik Spiral would write.


• Two new Iron Chefs have been posted in Creative Writing: JPAGC's Halloween and Lord Goring's Upchuck as Austin Powers.


• What are your thoughts on zero-waste shopping?


• Talk about creative ways comics and cartoons dealt with cursing and insults.

Boo!

Today is a spooky holiday, at least for pumpkins, because today is Carve a Pumpkin Day! I don't think anyone asked how the pumpkins feel about this one.

Of course, today is also Halloween, so get out there and trick-or-treat yourself some candy! Or, if you're hanging out with the actual personification of Halloween, go trash some rich neighborhoods with eggs and toilet paper.

Fanfic Update!

• Back to Highland: A Daria/Worm Crossover, by Meester_Lee (part 4): "Daria must have dozed off at some point, because someone was shaking her shoulder. 'Wake up, Dar, I mean Cynic,' said Brittany. 'we're landing.'"


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 23): "For a few moments a heavy silence fell in the Morgendoffer's living room. Then Daniel, clearly astonished asked, 'Excuse me what ?!'"


• Drive, by atiyatortilla (parts 1 and 2): "From the outside looking in, the Griffins were the all-American family." (Part 2)


• Spare The Rod, Spoil The Quinn (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "While all of the kids are upstairs Quinn and Jim are in the living room, where Quinn is freaking out over her very public meltdown that day. 'I can't believe it,' said Quinn, 'I actually hit a child!'" (Part 3)

There's No Way This Will End Well

Jake's getting a little too enthusiastic about National Cat Day, and I think Mr. Whiskers is about to teach him the error of his ways. To all the cat lovers out there, please enjoy this day responsibly!

Today is also the anniversary of a major milestone for the internet in 1969, which is very appropriate. What goes together better than cats and the internet? Nothing, that's what.

Fandom News!

• somitomi posted a new artwork thread.


• Szcz posted a new Iron Chef: Uncovered Links.

Ruth Is Unimpressed By Your Decorating Skills

Hooray! It's Mother-In-Law Day! Helen's so happy, she's crying tears of joy. At least I think that's joy. Helen, put that bottle of wine down right now! It's American Beer Day, and if you're going to get wasted you'd better do it right!

Also, on this day in 1997, Daria appeared in Fortune Magazine. She's in a photo with a whole bunch of cartoons, and she sure looks as thrilled about it as you'd expect.

Fanfic Update!

• Back To Highland: A Daria/Worm Crossover, by Meester_Lee (part 3): "The C-130 reached the end of the runway, revved up, and then took off, banking as it presumably turned towards the direction of Texas. The military transport's interior was noisy, much noisier than the airliners Daria had flown in."


• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 5): "'I really wish Ariel went to school with us.' Link said to Allen over lunch at school. 'Then I could just run into her and talk to her about the party instead of having to make up some reason to meet somewhere.'"


• Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 31): "As a safety precaution Daria, Shamus, Anton, and Darren had brought with them 'rescue balls.' These were inflatable containers that could hold about two hours of air."


• Spare The Rod, Spoil The Quinn (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (part 1): "Quinn and Stacy are having lunch at Pizza King. While the place is a teen hangout the thrity-something best friends still like to eat here for sentimental reasons."

I'd Love to See Him Play Football Dressed Like That!

It's Punk for a Day Day, and Kevin is definitely dressed for the occasion. Not that you need an excuse, but this would be a good day to read (or re-read) Charles RB's God Save The Esteem series. It's more punk than...a lot of punk stuff, I guess. I'm not hip to the lingo.

Today is also the Feast of St. Daria, and while no one would actually call Daria a saint, I'm sure she'll be happy to feast on some pizza and/or cheese fries. Why not join in? It is a sacred day, after all!

Pizza and cheese fries sound like an especially good idea, because this happens to be National Greasy Foods Day on top of everything else. I find it hard to believe that's a coincidence, though. Daria's feast day would have to involve greasy food, wouldn't it?

Fandom News!

• Discuss Hillary Clinton's comments about Russian assets.


• What bands are similar to Mystik Spiral? Share your thoughts in the thread.


• Talk about the protests in Chile.

They Certainly LOOK Mental in the Morning

Welcome to Good Mornings with Daria and Jane, where we'll be discussing the fact that today is TV Talk Show Host Day! The hosts would really like to wake up from this nightmare, but first a word from our sponsors!

Also on this day in 2002, the Fashion Club made a cameo appearance in the webcomic Mall Monkeys. Did the artist get their good sides or does Tiffany need to break some fingers?

Fanfic Update!

• Back to Highland: A Daria/Worm Crossover, by Meester_Lee (parts 1 and 2): "Daria finished toweling off, went to her locker, and started getting dressed. She hoped her trainer would think that she had a good workout. This exercise thing was not something she was used to." (Part 2)


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 22): "Daniel was tired. He couldn't wait to be home so he could finally rest. However he'd have to wait, since her sister's friend were there. And they had plans for him."


• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 16): "Jake got the message on his cellphone while out on a sales call. 'Jake, our travel plans have just been modified,' said Helen's voice. She sounded angry yet resigned."


• Pure Magic (Odds and Ends), by LSM (COMPLETE!): "'Jesse, have you ever thought about how the world is a miracle?' 'Uhhhhh, sometimes. Like music, you can hear it but not see it, like that tree in the forest. That's messed up, but cool. Like the oceans, they go on so far but I can't see 'em.'"

Keep Those Good Vibes Flowing!

Jake, Helen, and all of their hippie friends are going to try one last time to levitate the Pentagon in honor of the real-life event that happened on this day in 1967. I doubt they'll succeed, but maybe Jake will manage not to break his foot this time. Not taking any bets on it, though.

Today is also the anniversary of the first Daria VHS tape, released on this day in 1997. Hooray for low image quality and the original music!

Fandom News!

• DocForbin suggests a possible solution to the Columbus Day/Indigenous Peoples Day controversy.


• Talk about the things they get away with in kids' cartoons.


• What do you think about turning fanfic into original fiction?

Abandon All Hope!

Daria's just revisiting an old scene from the computer game Daria's Inferno, which was released on this day in 2000. I have a copy, but I won't be playing it if only because I still get pissed off when I think about those steam tunnels.

Today is also Evaluate Your Life Day, so you should consider Jake's advice: "You walk away. You change your name, move to another state, get some ID. It's not too late to start over, Daria, it's not too late! You're still a young man! You don't have to live with your mistakes! Get out while you can!"

On second thought, maybe you shouldn't consider Jake's advice.

Fanfic Update!

• Aunt Infinitum, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Skip was busy chanting 'Go Grizzlies!' when Amy marched over and snatched the microphone out of his hand. 'Hold on,' she interrupted. 'I want to say something.'"


• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 4): "Sandi lay in her bed with her laptop and looked at the photos the Fashion Club had sent her. She sighed longingly at how the rest of the club had turned a bald girl with weak eyelashes and a too big nose into someone almost good enough for a fashion club junior league."


• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (parts 14 and 15): "'Farrah still hasn't called or written me,' Daria wrote in her journal. 'I'm still feeling miserable. It's not just that I've had a falling-out with Farrah, but I don't know if I can still talk to Mr. Skein and I feel cut off from Laura and the Penricks. I still like Laura. I miss seeing and talking with her and I worry about how she's doing with the cancer.'" (Part 15)


• Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 30): "Erin was already halfway through her breakfast when her alarm went off. Her hair still damp from her early morning shower and toast still in her hand, she silenced the alarm. She regarded the clothes laid out on the bed."

Mack Daddy...To the Extreme!!!

Mack's shedding his down-to-earth persona to take a spin as Evel Knievel, who was born on this day in 1938. I thought Kevin was the one who liked to try motorcycle stunts, but Mack must have hidden depths no one has ever discovered.

Today is also Wear Something Gaudy Day, so this would be a good day to attend the Fashion Don'ts Costume Gala! Or not. Depends on how much of a tolerance you have for Fashion Club babble.

Fandom News!

• Talk about remedies for a potential U.S. recession.


• Rest in peace, Sam Bobrick.

No, Kids, You Don't Get the Day Off From School

The students of Lawndale High don't seem overly impressed that today is World Students' Day, but just wait until you see Mr. DeMartino's reaction. It won't be pleasant.

It's okay, Mr. D. Today is your day, too, because it's National Grouch Day! As one of the grumpiest characters on the show, you should definitely celebrate this one however you'd like. May I suggest a hike?

Fanfic Update!

• Aunt Infinitum, by Kristen Bealer (part 5): "Everyone gathered around outside the camp office, where Skip and Mr. Potts were waiting. My Potts welcomed all of the former campers, then announced the beginning of a hike. Most of them, Daria included, seemed less than thrilled at the idea but Skip quickly bullied them into it."


• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 3): "The next night, the Morgendorfer Family was having dinner together. “'So, I know Tom was just being nice to Sandi,' said Quinn as she recounted yesterday's trip to the hospital. 'But the way Sandi smiled at him and called him wonderful was just...ew!' She shuddered theatrically. "


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 21): "The throw was very fast and angled. Daniel was too tired to dodge the football and surely couldn't punch it. He'd break a couple of finger at least! The only option was to block it."


• The Eternal Cynic, by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "'My Queen, Daria,' Sandyss leaned over the Queen's bed and gently shook her. 'Time to like rise and shine and face the new day.' Queen Daria groaned, stretched, sat up in bed and yawned. She waved aside the glass of cold water and the coof-derivative pills which Sandyss offered."


• Mad Cow Killer, A Life After Thirty Halloween Special, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Chad and Sandi are asleep in Chad's bed. While the sheets prevent us from seeing anything R-rated we can tell that they are both naked. Chad wakes up, turns over and stares at Sandi. Sandi starts to wake up." (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)

O RLY?

Jane seems to doubt that today is International Skeptics Day, which is perfect! That's the spirit, Jane!

Also on this day in 1999, the Paperpusher's Message Board (PPMB) was founded. Or somewhere around that date, anyway. The archaeological records from that distant era are sketchy at best, apparently.

Fandom News!

• Talk about companies' actions over the Hong Kong protests.


• Discuss RX-87's fanfic Daria VS 40K: Is It The Grim Darkness Of The Far Future Yet?

Which Came First?

I gotta give full credit to Joey for giving it his all for World Egg Day, but I think a trip to the grocery store would have been more than sufficient. Anything to impress Quinn, I guess.

Today is also National Sausage Pizza Day, so you'll probably find Daria and Jane at Pizza Prince in their usual spot. Of course, nonconformists that they are, I bet they ordered pepperoni today. Such rebels!

Fanfic Update!

• Aunt Infinitum, by Kristen Bealer (parts 3 and 4): "'Hey, Daria, did you see Skip trip over that tree branch?' Amy asked during another of the camp's many nature hikes. 'He landed flat on his face. What a gas.'" (Part 4)


• Daria: Inverted (Twisted Tales from the Dariaverse), by Peridaniel (COMPLETE!): "Jane walked to the Morgendorffer household on her way to school, waiting in front of the door for her best friend to join her."


• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 13): "Farrah Dagworth looked at the pamphlet again and scowled. She'd found it in the hall bathroom at Daria's house and she might have left it alone except that it was one of several identical pamphlets lying on the floor all issued by someplace called the Ilvermorny School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."


• Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 30): "Daria waited patiently as Darren and Anton brought the Explorer close to the derelict ship. It at least felt like it took as long to move the past 1,000 m (3300 ft) as it did to get to Uranus from Mars."


• Mad Cow Killer, A Life After Thirty Halloween Special, by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "We first see a teenage couple making out in a convertible with the top down. The midnight hour approaches Now we see a man in a cow costume walk towards the car, wielding a butcher knife. The killing chill takes over him" (Part 2)

Moth to a Flame!

Trent is featured here as the firefighter least likely to inspire confidence on Fire Prevention Day, but at least he's awake this time. Chances are he's here to put out a fire at his own house if anyone forgot that rule about not building a fire in the rooms that don't have fireplaces.

Also on this day in 1998, Daria was named a "toon diva" in Entertainment Weekly. I think that's the first and only time Daria was referred to as any kind of diva.

Fandom News!

• Discussion is ongoing about the future of the PPMB.


• Talk about this season of CW DC shows in the new thread.


• Share your thoughts on the new Joker movie.

Follicle-Free, Anyway!

Everyone's favorite criminale is celebrating his jailbreak, which is appropriate because today is Bald and Free Day and he happens to be both! As well as a few other adjectives I could mention, but I'll let him off easy today.

Today is also the anniversary of the Broadway debut of the musical Cats on this day in 1982. Jake is probably still grumbling that he "could write songs for cats!" And, yes, I'm sure he could also write songs for dogs.

Fanfic Update!

• Aunt Infinitum, by Kristen Bealer (parts 1 and 2): "'Good Lord, Rita, you can't possibly go out looking like that!' 'And why not?' Rita put a hand on her hip and struck a saucy pose, at which point the barely-there spaghetti straps holding up her low-cut top threatened to slide off her shoulders. 'Because you look like a...a...tramp!'" (Part 2)


• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 2): "'Wow, you were right.' Jane said, looking at the candies scattered over the Pizza King table. 'There really are more ZooZoo Drops in a box than Juicy Joes.'"


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 20): "The following day, a mona lisa smile was printed on Daniel's face. Granted, he had never been a person, he usually avoided a party like this one ... but after months of confinement, this opportunity was really a breath of fresh air."


• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 12): "Two weeks after Daria's birthday, Jake and Helen finally found a renter for their old house on Whirlwind Drive. The house had sat empty since the previous renters did a midnight flit after falling behind in their rent for a couple of months, then selling their refrigerator and dishwasher before they disappeared."


• Lawndale High: The Next Generation - season 1, by Peridaniel (part 4): " Welcome back to Lawndale, Stacy Rowe! The message was written in blue on a yellow banner and being hung across the main hallway of the school as the kids walked under it."

Hey Hey! Ho Ho! Kevin Thompson's Got to Go!

The Lawndale High faculty doesn't seem impressed by World Teachers' Day, but they'd probably be a lot more enthusiastic if they could earn a decent wage for once. Or if they didn't have to deal with Kevin. Either one would be reward enough.

Also on this day in 1998, Michelle Klein-Häss published her essay, "Morons in the Control Room." It was a call to action against the technical glitches in the Daria broadcasts in 1998. Check it out for a glimpse of fandom in the early days!

Fandom News!

• Can you help clear up some generational confusion?


• Talk about horror movies with Dark Kuno.


• Read and discuss essays about Daria and "The System" and Lucky Strike.


• ozferret wonders when the Morgandorffers became Jewish.

I Sense a Violent Game of Tug of War Coming On

It looks like Jane and Daria are about to have a disagreement about which one of them gets custody of Tom for National Boyfriends Day, but if it were up to me I'd say forget it and go have pizza together. Sisters before misters, amirite?

On the other hand, they're still probably having a better time than Quinn and Sandi, who are celebrating Mean Girls Day. Of course, as far as Sandi is concerned, that's every day.

Fanfic Update!

• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (parts 18 and 19): "Later, that day, Daniel and Brittany were standing in line in the cafeteria. 'Ugh! I hate it when the trays are wet.' She said. 'That which does not kill us makes us stronger.'" (Part 19)


• Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 29): "No one was waiting for her in the office. Erin had not expected it. When she found the building's foyer empty, she was a little surprised. When none of her friends were waiting on the side-walk she was disappointed but she headed towards their usual coffee shop."


• From Champ To Chump (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Lauren was angrily ringing the bell and pounding on the front door. Ultra immediately answered. 'Hey, babe,' he said with a goofy smile, 'What's up?'"


• Shameless Self Insert Into Daria, by James the Lesser (part 5): "Daria, Jane, and Adrian are bored listening to the economics teacher, Mrs. Bennet talk. 'Can anyone give me an example of this kind of flow?' Someone raises their hand. 'The mall?'"

Now She's in the Old-Fashioned Club

Time was not kind to Quinn, who's here to celebrate International Day of Older Persons. I'm sure Sandi would gloat, but there's little reason to think she looks any better at this age. Or, if she does, I suspect Dr. Shar had something to do with it.

Today is also National Homemade Cookies Day, so join Helen and Rita in picking which tube to slice and bake. Daria will be waiting outside your door with a plate of heart-shaped cookies and a super-creepy grin.

Fandom News!

• Discuss the classification of the "OK" gesture as a symbol of hate.


• Charles RB posted a new Iron Chef: Mack Is Jane's Addition.


• What do you think of the recent poll saying that most Americans think Arabic numerals should not be taught in school?


• jay wonders about the factors behind Daria's inspiration.


• Read (or re-read) and talk about Chris Tucker's stories.


• Check out an old New York Times article about IIFY?

"Coffee...caffeine. Dark circles. Capisce?"

Daria's enjoying what might or might not be coffee on National Coffee Day, but she'd better not overdo it. Today is also World Heart Day, and too much caffeine wouldn't be healthy. Jake should take note, too, although I think caffeine for someone as high-strung as Jake is a bad idea even without his heart condition.

Fanfic Update!

• Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 14): "Jennifer yawned wide, earning herself a painful CLICK in her jaw. As she walked into the kitchen, still in her oversized nightshirt, she saw her mother sitting at the table, documents spread across it as she compared two piles of paper in her hands, and another laying before her."


• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 1): "Another day, Highland High was letting out. 'Of course I want to have dinner with you tonight, Tom!' Quinn was saying on her cell phone. 'But you know how important the fashion club is! Oh, yes, of course you're important too! Why don't you pick me up at Sandi's place at around sixish and we'll take it from there? Oh, I can borrow something from Sandi if I have to dress up first.'"


• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 11): "Daria had never thought that an eleventh birthday would ever be important. But it was, at least in the magical world. She was now old enough to attend Ilvermorny and Hogwarts might or might not send her their acceptance letter."


• Divisive Loyalties (Iron Chef: Mack Is Jane's Addition), by Youth of Oz (COMPLETE!): "'Do you think I complain a lot?' asked Daria as she lay in Mack's arms, her auburn hair feathering against his dark chocolate skin. She was frowning slightly, but her glasses magnified it into a deeply-troubled scowl."


• From Champ To Chump, by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "It's a brisk Friday night in the fall, which means only one thing: high school football. On the field Lawndale is playing a close game against Oakwood." (Part 2)


• You Want It Darker, by LSM (part 13): "'I told you you'd knock ‘em dead, baby.' She was curled up on Todd's lap, snuggled into him as he played with strands of her hair, strong fingers untangling the knots firmly but gently."

Hitting All the Right Notes

Quinn's certainly enjoying Love Note Day, although I'm sure no one could love Quinn nearly as much as she loves herself. In fact, it wouldn't surprise me to learn that she sent more than a few of those notes to herself.

Today is also Crush a Can Day, so Kevin will probably spend this super-romantic day smashing beer cans against his head. Same as any other day, come to think of it.

Fandom News!

• Talk about Thomas Cook going out of business.


• Three new Iron Chefs have been posted: Charles RB's Nathan Is One Of Us, Roentgen's Send a character on a nice vacation, and Robyn's Send a Character Backward in Time.


• Keep up with the latest news about Trump's impeachment.


• Vote in the Deathmatch poll between Geoffrey Cox MP and Lionel Hutz off The Simpsons.

You Wouldn't Like Him When He's Sensitive!

Mr. O'Neill's getting into the spirit of National Comic Book Day, but I think he's off the mark for this one. The wimpiest Daria character as one of the all-time strongest comic characters? I don't think so. Is there a comic book character out there called Spineless Man? Because he could totally nail that one.

Fanfic Update!

• The Creek Gang visit Lawndale, by sonofapreacherman (COMPLETE!): "The phone in the Morgendorffer's house rang. Before Quinn had the chance, Daria answered it. 'Hello' 'I see' 'What's your ETA?' 'Alright, but you should probably tell her that yourself' Daria handed the phone to Quinn"


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 17): "Daniel and Quinn were walking toward Lawndale high when three guys ran past them and stopped them. 'Hey, Quinn, can I carry your books?' 'Hey, Quinn, can I carry your ... pencil?' 'Hey, Quinn, can I carry your, uh, um ... got anything else?'"


• Happy Adversity, by Lady Evil (part 12): "'So, what did you think of the play?' asked Tom as he drove up to the Morgendorfer house. 'It was very, um....' I didn't understand a freaking word of it! 'Interesting.'"


• Lawndale High: The Next Generation - season 1, by Peridaniel (part 2): "Philip and Amy both stood by the front doors of the school, watching as rain pounded against the ground along with an occasional flash of lightning accompanied by a distant boom of thunder."


• Lawndale's Newest Cape (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Meester_Lee (COMPLETE!): "'Hello, everyone! I'm Linda Griffin and I'm interviewing Lawndale's latest Cape.' A girl wearing a skintight red-and-white body-suit with a capital C on her chest, her face concealed by a mask stood next to Ms. Griffin."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Nathan Is One Of Us), by Youth of Oz (COMPLETE!): "'According to this,' said Dave, disinterest and contempt warring in his voice, 'Daria's coming back in "Daria and Jodie" about her black best friend coping with modern PC-virtue-signalling, glass ceilings and other prejudice.'"


• Very down under (Iron Chef: Send a character on a nice vacation), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "The old wind wheezed around them, in a sibling sound akin to a constant whip. Helen closed its hood closely, until only a small opening to her face was possible. Despite the layers of wool, polyester, leather and cotton of her clothes, she felt far from warm."

But Let's Not Celebrate This PARTICULAR Bisexual, Okay?

Alison is pleased to inform everyone that today is Celebrate Bisexuality Day, which would be great if Daria hadn't taken the only LGBT character and turned her into a predator. Oh, well.

This is also Banned Books Week, so please follow Daria's example and yell at the television! Or, better yet, read a banned book or two yourself.

Fandom News!

• Remember Papa Roach's "Last Resort" video? Find out what happened to the kids in it.


• Talk about Smijey's insane story Unbearable.


• Share your favorite cartoon Easter eggs.


• Discuss the end of Keith Knight's daily comic strip The Knight Life.

Peace Out!

Daria's going to have to do better than flash a peace sign if she wants to celebrate International Day of Peace. In fact, she'll probably opt to spend the whole day observing the quest for peace...and quiet while she reads a book.

Today is also the anniversary of the publication of The Hobbit on this day in 1937. If Jake didn't take this opportunity to make Helen another Hobbit-shaped candle, I'll be very disappointed.

Fanfic Update!

• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 16): "It was afternoon and it was very hot. Daniel fell to the ground on his back. His left cheek hurt due to the punch he received. He tasted blood in his mouth."


• Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 29): "The Martian Explorer I came up alongside the derelict ship. The computer made certain that they did not collide with any debris along the way."


• Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 32): "By the time Daria had arrived at the scene, she saw practically all the townspeople gathered together under the night sky. 'Where is he?' asked Daria, getting out of Mr. DeMartino's car."

Ahoy, Me Maties!

Upchuck's on the lookout for booty (which will probably get him slapped) because today is International Talk Like A Pirate Day. Be sure to throw in plenty of "avast" and "yo ho ho" to your conversations so all your friends will think you're cool. Enjoy your grog and plunder!

Fandom News!

• Fans from Australia, join in the Aussie Daria fan meet & greet.


• Kem has a question about artist websites.


• A Lad Called Brodster posted a new Iron Chef: A Tale of Two Powers.


• Did you know someone before (s)he/they became famous? Talk about it in the thread.


• How well has Daria aged? Share your thoughts.


• Vote in the Deathmatch poll between Pharah and Daenerys + Drogon.


• Keep up with the news about the Jodie reboot.


• Lawndale-high has a brand new forum for golden oldie fanfics!

Quinn Would Rather Occupy Fifth Avenue

Corporate Quinn thinks she's having a bad day now, but just wait until she finds out that Occupy Wall Street has returned to celebrate its eighth anniversary with a massive demonstration right outside her office. Not that she has a problem with protests, but all that talk about 1% and 99%? Ewwww. Way too much math.

Fanfic Update!

• Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 21): "Jane hummed absentmindedly, as she worked on her latest art project. Classes would start back up in a few days, and Jane hoped to have her sculpture completed before leaving."


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 15): "Finally home. Daniel thought as he put the keys in the lock. The informal chat promised by Jodie had quickly turned in two one-hour meetings with both groups."


• Happy Adversity, by Lady Evil (part 11): "Helen ordered the pizza on the ride home and it was waiting for them when they got home. Jake opened the pizza boxes and started putting slices on plates."


• What You Deserve, by atiyatortilla (part 2): "'This was a bad idea', Daria told herself. A chill ran through her as she fidgeted with the sleeves of her cardigan - partially due to fear, partially due to the weather. South Jersey was having a particularly bitter winter and the whole house felt like an icebox."

That's Not How Old Money Gets Old

Tom is feeling generous for Free Money Day, and I'll take him up on it even if you won't. It's not like he's going to run out anytime soon, after all.

Meanwhile, Helen and Linda, Quinn and Sandi, and Jane and Daria are probably celebrating National Women's Friendship Day. Well, Jane and Daria are, anyway. The others are probably just being bitchy and stabbing each other in the back at every opportunity.

Fandom News!

• BloodyWilliam has produced a new Daria character alter ego!


• Scientists have figured out the question to life, the universe, and everything.


• Scissors MacGillicutty is looking for someone to take over as owner of the PPMB.


• Discuss the case of the missing golden toilet.

Beware!

Ms. Li is horrified to find that today is Friday the 13th, or maybe she just realized that she forgot to feed the bomb-sniffing dogs. Either way, keep in mind that today is also Defy Superstition Day, so go ahead and cross a black cat's path and walk under a ladder if you feel like it.

Today is also International Chocolate Day, so it's possible that Ms. Li just caught someone eating unauthorized chocolate. Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Fanfic Update!

• Happy Adversity, by Lady Evil (part 10): "'Here.' Clarissa said, giving Link a wrapped gift. 'I hope you like it. Happy birthday.' 'Thanks.' said Link. He decided he'd better be a polite party host. 'Want some party mix?' 'I can't.' said Clarissa. 'Nut allergy.'"


• What You Deserve, by atiyatortilla (part 1): "Memory was a fickle thing. Daria Quinn Morgendorffer knew this better than most."

"Helen! What's the number for 911?"

Quinn is calling 911 to report a major fashion emergency because today is Emergency Number Day. If you think that's a poor use of emergency services, then you haven't seen Brooke wearing stripes and spots together. Ewwwww.

Fandom News!

• ozferret wants to talk about Erotica in literature, specifically in Daria fan-fic.


• Discuss Facebook and mind-reading tech.

Does It Still Count as "Guest" Blogging?

Hey, remember that time I took over the Daria Fandom Blog II temporarily as guest blogger while The Angst Guy took some time off? Because it was exactly nine years ago today. I'm sure TAG will be back any day now. Any day.

Today is also Teddy Bear Day, so if you've been meaning to trade a bear for a mouse in order to steal your boyfriend back from a couple of scheming sisters, then...I think you should seek professional help. Just my opinion.

Fanfic Update!

• Am I A Grownup Yet?, by jones2000 (part 20): "It seemed that wherever she went, Daria Morgendorffer couldn't get away from those fucking pigeons and their incessant noise. Maybe they were following her. Yes, that sounded like about her luck."


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 14): "Once Daniel had a shower and changed back, he headed toward the exit of the school. He couldn't wait to go home. His plan, however, shipwrecked miserably when he heard Jodie call him."


• Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 28): "Erin and Brenda returned Dennis to the offices of Boston Products. Dennis ducked his head back into the car, 'Excellent work, Ladies. Is it the same time tomorrow?' Erin checked her schedule, 'I'm afraid so, Dennis.'"


• The Funeral, by LadieTAG (COMPLETE!): "I looked over at the business's sign just as Google Maps said 'Your destination is on the right'."


• Lawndale High: The Next Generation - season 1, by Peridaniel (part 1): "The bright September morning sun shown over Lawndale, many kids basking in its light as they enjoyed the final fleeting moments of summer before they were to go to school that morning."

Beer and Football! A Winning Combination!

I think Jesse's loving beer just a little too much for National Beer Lover's Day, but perhaps he's just trying to hide from the sound of Kevin singing that stupid 99 Bottles of Beer song yet again.

Speaking of Kevin's favorite things, today is also the fortieth anniversary of ESPN. Then again, Kevin might prefer the Pigskin Channel, since ESPN has a bad habit of broadcasting non-football sports on occasion.

Fandom News!

• Read and discuss an article about how the English language is taking over the planet.


• Meester_Lee wonders if anyone has written a Daria/Worm crossover.


• What do you think about San Francisco declaring the NRA a domestic terrorist organization?


• Vote in the Deadliest Warrior poll between Olivia Benson and Dex Parios.


• Share your thoughts about Daria's art style.


• Check out Daria as a Funko Pop!

You Had ONE JOB!

Daria and Tom are very disappointed that they ordered what appears to be cheeseless pizza on Cheese Pizza Day. For shame, you two. For shame.

Today is also Be Late for Something Day, so maybe the cheese just hasn't arrived yet. I would say that this is Trent's kind of holiday, except that Trent is generally late for everything.

Fanfic Update!

• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 13): "What a great way to end the day. Daniel thought sarcastically as he changed into the locker room. P.E had always been his sworn enemy."


• Happy Adversity, by Lady Evil (part 9): "'Well, it's been a week since I had any bad dreams.' Link said at one of his therapy sessions with Dr. Becky. 'I haven't stolen anything since Jake told me not to. And at Thanksgiving I didn't hit Quinn with a pie, even though I really, really wanted to. I haven't cussed at any teachers, no matter how stupid they were. So I'm cured, right?'"

Is the "E" for "Earrings"?

Quinn's just about to buy the cuuuuutest accessories on eBay, which is celebrating its twenty-fourth anniversary today! I'm sure Helen and Jake won't mind the higher-than-usual credit card bill, right?

Fandom News!

• Discuss the death of Valerie Harper.


• Roentgen shares an article about Tom Clancy and Boomer Dads.

I Don't Think He's Quite Right in...The Head!

The Backgrounder known as "The Head" is finally getting his turn in the spotlight, because today is the twenty-fifth anniversary of the TV show The Head. All we know about this character is that he's a fan of the show and he (allegedly) has low self-esteem. He actually seemed pretty enthusiastic in class, which is surprising given that his teacher was Mr. O'Neill. Weird.

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (parts 9 and 10): "'Mail call!' said the guards. 'Any letters?' asked Sirius. 'None for the likes o' you,' sneered Jennings" (Part 10)


• Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 28): "Daria sat staring at the computer screen. Today had started out as an emotional day, even though she hated to admit she had emotional reactions to things."


• Into The Night, by elainefr (COMPLETE!): "He fell to his knees, head bowed. Failure...... I'm a failure at everything. Seems like no matter what I do...... I can't win."


• Scenes, by JPAGC (part 4.1): "On the steering wheel, Jane caught a movement on the seat to her left and commented: 'Stop looking at your watch, will you? We'll be there on time.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Well, on Sick Sad Geeks, we'll be talking to the creative team of Ratboy: The Law of the Priests, the new limited series that is the follow up to the award winning Ratboy: Genesis and its ground-breaking sequel Ratboy: Exodus. We first spoke to writer Daria Morgendorffer."

Frankenstein Was the Scientist AND the Monster!

Jane is trying out a new style for Frankenstein Day, and I think she could do better. Then again, at least there's no hair dye involved. Also...is that Tom's sweater from "Jane's Addition"?

This whole thing just took a dark turn, didn't it?

Fandom News!

• Talk about TV theme songs that became smash hits.

Maybe Take It a Little Easy on the Wine, Though

Jane and Alison are enjoying National Red Wine Day, but Jake will stick to his usual martini. Helen will have whatever's available if she has to deal with either of her sisters for more than five minutes.

Today is also the anniversary of Leo Tolstoy's birth in 1828, which would probably be of interest to Aunt Amy. She did spend a lot of time "reading those weird Russian novels," after all.

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (parts 7 and 8): "Matthew Stearne pulled in to the Bagpiper's parking lot. He didn't like the apartment complex; It was old, beat-up, and he didn't like his neighbors." (Part 8)


• F is for..., by JAS (parts 2 - 4): "As the hot water flowed over her body, Quinn slowly felt herself to calm down. Warmth of the water drove away the coldness from within her. Now, awake and with the lights on, her nightmare seemed.. Well, a nightmare." (Part 3) (Part 4)


• Happy Adversity, by Lady Evil (part 8): "'Daria....' Helen's voice sang out in the morning. 'Hm...wha?' she muttered. "Goway. Saturday." Daria rolled over. 'Daria, I'm sorry to wake you.' said Helen."


• Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 34): "Daria's discovery of her magical powers had another consequence, one that she was aware of, but had previously left HJ to deal with alone: Support Group."


• The Lion Meets the Mouse, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "That night, Stacy picked at her dinner as usual and then asked to be excused to make a phone call. 'Make it quick,' Brenda instructed her. Stacy looked up the Griffins' phone number and dialed it before she could lose her nerve."

Woof!

This sad little bulldog is hoping that Daria will refrain from trying to run him over with the car in honor of National Dog Day, but with her peripheral vision I wouldn't count on it. I just hope there's a puppy heaven to go along with kitty heaven.

In what had better be a coincidence, today also happens to be Women's Equality Day, to commemorate the Nineteenth Amendment being added to the United States Constitution on this day in 1920. This gave women the right to vote, but whether or not that translated into automatic equality is a matter for debate.

Fandom News!

• Discuss Trump's offer to buy Greenland.


• Any ideas on creating a shared Daria map?


• Robyn is curious about a genderswapped Ted DeWitt Clinton.

"No one will ever accuse these kids of being Reds!"

Jake's doing his part to enforce the Communist Control Act, which passed on this day in 1954. Melody Powers, meanwhile, will be taking a much more...proactive...role in enforcing the law.

Today is also International Strange Music Day, so this would be a good time to find out whether Trent is beckoning to a U.F.O., attempting to save humanity from aliens, or just writing a jingle.

Fanfic Update!

• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 12): "Jodie had begun to list various extracurricular activities when the bell rang. This saved Daniel, but only temporarily."


• Daria in Capeside, by sonofapreacherman (COMPLETE!): "The Morgendorffers were on a road trip up the east coast, heading towards Maine. Jake took a wrong turn somewhere in Massachusetts. They were about to ask for directions when the car broke down."


• The Lion Meets the Mouse, by Kristen Bealer (parts 2 and 3): "The rest of the day passed slowly, but Stacy began to pick up on a few things while she was supposed to be learning about multiplying fractions and the difference between a simile and a metaphor." (Part 3)


• Never Again, by OzFerret (COMPLETE!): "Hot blood pumped through her fingers. Running down to cake her in filth."


• Teaching is a work of heart, by Rémi (part 21): "Casa Lane. Jane's room. Jane is creating a sculpture by glueing together various items, while Quinn is seated on her bed. But the atmosphere between them is awkward. Jane isn't working with her usual spirit, and Quinn isn't prattling."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "The bell rang and a veritable stampede broke through the front doors of Lawndale High, hooting and cheering. Daria and Jane followed behind them at a more leisurely pace."


• Windy City, by elainefr (COMPLETE!): "'Buy you a drink?' She didn't bother looking to see who it was. She simply signaled for another after finishing the one that she had."