Friday, August 17, 2018

Two Eyes Good, Four Eyes Better!


Daria's going to settle in with a childhood favorite on the anniversary of the publication of Animal Farm on this day in 1945. That is, she will if her fellow Grizzlies will back off on the watermelon games and horseback rides long enough for her to read it.

Also, on this day in 1997, Daria was featured in the The Chicago Tribune. It gives some interesting background into the development of the show, although Daria might take issue with her description as "Beavis and Butt-head's only female friend." Friend...is not the word I would have gone with.

Fanfic Update!
  • Bobbie Caller, by Meester_Lee (parts 2 and 3): "Daria looked out her bedroom the next morning and saw that it was raining and windy. After she got dressed and went downstairs and opened the front door, she saw that it was not only rainy and windy, but chilly, too. Daria got on the phone before breakfast and told Jane that she'd get her parents to pick her up on the way to school." (Part 3)

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (parts 24 and 25): "Albus Dumbledore's Monday was not going as he'd expected. True, he had expected to be busy. As the headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, he had expected to cope with the minutiae of running one of the foremost schools of witchcraft and wizardry in Europe, and the only such school of its size and import in Britain." (Part 25)

  • I am not a good friend, by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "Whenever Kevin saw Mack, the first thing that came to mind was the words of his dad."

  • In the woods, no one will hear her scream, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Quinn are in their tent at night. Quinn : Daria ? Daria give Quinn an interrogative look. Quinn : Do you feel weird sharing a tent ?" (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • It really makes you sink, by Rémi (part 1): "Daria's room. Daria is sitting on her bed, looking awfully depressed. She has dried tear streaks on her cheeks. She is cradling a pink baby-T in her arms and sadly looking at the yellow smiley face."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 20): "'You sure no one's home?' Angie asked as Elizaveta led her by the hand into the Morgendorffer house. 'Yes, szereto.'"

  • Superiors, by ST91 (parts 5 and 6): "General Rogers was already awake by an hour when the alarm sounded at 6:00 am. Yet he had decided to stay in bed to save his strength." (Part 6)

  • The Wrath of Con, by Lady Evil (part 20): "Danny woke up Sunday to a sound he never thought he'd ever hear. Jesse was screaming."

  • Wreckonciliation (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn is at her desk going through her mail. She frowns as she looks at it. Quinn: (Thought VO) Homemaker Magazine...mine. Hot Rod Monthly...Jim. Pre-Approved Credit...shred. Coupons at Payday...might wanna hold on to that. Phone bill." (Part 2) (Part 3)

Wednesday, August 15, 2018

Or There's Always Outlet Shopping, If You Prefer


Helen and Jake are taking a rare break for Relaxation Day, but if this wasn't actually an image from a fantasy sequence then I'm sure Helen's cell phone would be ringing at any moment to bring the good times to an end.

If relaxing isn't your thing, then you could take a road trip to Swedesville for Alternapalooza, which started on this day in 1997. There's nothing relaxing about bee stings, public humiliation, or malfunctioning vans, after all.

Fandom News!

Monday, August 13, 2018

Ooooh, Maybe I'm Amphibious!


Brittany's having a bit of a crisis right now because it's Left Hander's Day and she's not sure which hand she's supposed to use. Or she's just forgotten which one is left. Hard to tell with her. To all the people in fandom who actually are left-handed, enjoy your day! Smear all the ink you want and try to find a pair of scissors you can actually use!

Fanfic Update!
  • Bobbie Caller, by Meester_Lee (part 1): "'Class,' said Mr. DeMartino, 'we have ANOTHER student today! Would you WEL-come Ms. Bobbie Caller.'"

  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 17): "Jamie and Quinn sat in silence, as they drove to Stacy's house. The only noise was a Guys2Guys song playing on the radio. Now that Quinn was alone with Jamie, she had a million things she wanted to tell him, but the weight of their recent conversations embarrassed her too much to express her feelings."

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 8): "Tom started sizing up his wife with his eyes. He stated, 'You look amazing in that dress, Daria.' He walked over put his arms around her and kissed her neck."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 3): "Saturday morning once again found Erin standing in front of the DORA LEE COMMUNITY LIBRARY 'I'm spending all my weekends at a library', Erin thought as she entered the library she had helped create."

  • In the woods, no one will hear her scream, by Rémi (part 1): "The Morgendorffer are walking in the forest with camping gear. Daria is playing a harmonica while walking. Helen : Is she going to hurt our ears for long ? Quinn : Probably. That's her depressed tune."

  • Superiors, by ST91 (parts 2 - 4): "That morning, when the alarm rang, Daria Morgendorffer had to make an inhuman effort to turn it off." (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Turnover (Hiding in Plain Sight), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "What had infuriated President Trump most was that, in what the media sources from other nations were calling 'The Exodus',* was that all of the best people, the ones that he'd constantly insisted to voters that he would only hire to enact his programs, had fled to other nations, escaped to either the various off-world habitats or to other worlds, or had gone underground in order to become parts of the ever-growing resistance movements against the Trump Regime." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (Hiding in Plain Sight), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Jane Lane never imagined that she'd be doing spy stuff. Yes, she did it in the Legion. And yes, she had heard stories. But in terms of the actual cloak-and-dagger crap, dead drops, phony papers, etc., no, that was something else entirely."

Saturday, August 11, 2018

The Joke's On Them


It looks like Washington and Lincoln just shared a funny exchange in honor of Presidential Joke Day, but don't get too excited. It was probably just another snarky remark about Arbor Day's shoes.

Today is also the anniversary of the opening of the Mall of America, and to celebrate you could visit any repository of human greed and debasement of your choosing. Just remember that you parked in Fmossthree, okay?

Finally, it was on this day in 1999 that the episode "Just Add Water" first aired. It's kind of a middling episode, fandom opinion-wise, but we did get to learn about Mr. DeMartino's super-hilarious gambling problem and see a very dated Titanic movie reference. So there's that.

Fandom News!

Thursday, August 9, 2018

"It's a richer tone!"


Trent and Jesse are busy enjoying some Zappa in both analog and digital for Frank Zappa Day. Sadly, I think the nuance (like most things) is lost on Jesse.

While those two get out the aluminum foil, Daria will instead be celebrating Book Lover's Day by--what else?--reading a book. I might recommend Thoreau's Walden, which was published on this day in 1854. Did you know he was Jane Fonda's father in real life, too?

Fanfic Update!
  • California Screamin' (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn is driving while Jim is in the passenger seat and Storm is in the back seat. Quinn: So, which exit do we take again? Jim: 17. We take a left on Van Nuys, then a right on Ventura followed by a right on Sherman Oaks." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Cards, by tafka (COMPLETE!): "'Um, since we're like not an official club any more, I thought instead of looking at back issues of Waif, we could play a card game.' Stacy said, rummaging through her bag."

  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 16): "'Quinn! Your date is here!' Jake called across the house. 'Date? Where? I can take him!' said Jamie, looking around frantically. 'Uh...' 'Daddy, I told you,' said Quinn, coming down the stairs and putting on a light jacket, 'Jamie and I are just going out to study.'"

  • Dear Diary, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Dear diary, That tour at Middelton College turned out stranger than I thought it would."

  • A Simple Afternoon, by PrecambrianStudios (part 1): "As Jane put the finishing touches on her latest painting—a pale woman, evocative of the best Gothic revenants—Daria walked into her room and tossed her backpack onto Jane's bed before flopping face-first into her quilts. 'Shoot me. Right in the head.'"

  • Superiors, by ST91 (prologue and part 1): "The scientists had said that everything would be fine. They had assured that there would be no damage to things or people. They were wrong." (Part 1)

  • Tom Riddle's War, by Meester Lee (COMPLETE!): "Tom Riddle sat with his father and his mother and listened to the wireless. The King was giving a speech, a speech which in so many words said that the British people would band together, stand up to tyranny, defeat the Nazis, then go on to create some post-war utopia where all would live in peace and plenty."

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

"Swim, you cow! Swim!"


Jodie looks uncharacteristically serene for Esther Williams's birthday, and the way that alter ego is drawn I'm not entirely sure if Jodie is jumping into the water or rising up out of it. Either way, it's nice to see her doing something fun for once in her overworked life.

Fandom News!

Sunday, August 5, 2018

Okay, Upchuck, Now Put Some Damn Pants On!


Upchuck is about the last person any of us wants to see celebrating National Underwear Day, but there he is. On the bright side, at least he is wearing underwear. It's all in the minor blessings, really.

On a less disturbing note, today is both Friendship Day and International Forgiveness Day, which are both appropriate to Daria and Jane's relationship.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 45): "Ms. Crowe and Miss Purcell contacted Lillian a week after their first visit. Lillian was pleased that Ms. Crowe had learned enough about No-Maj customs to call ahead by telephone instead of simply apparating onto her doorstep unannounced."

  • InValidaTed (The Ted Zone), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'So what was that all about with Mr. O'Neill? Who was on the phone?' Ted turned from his locker to see Daria talking to her friend across the hall."

  • Of Microwaves and Electric Keyboards, by Souless Familliar (part 7): "Daria started moving towards the closet, where her keyboard resided, dainty and slender hands reaching towards the handle, pulling it open to reveal the keyboard, which Jane figured had seen a lot of use as the ivory keys had faded into a slightly dull colour."

  • On The Road, by elainefr (part 48): "'We need to talk.' Damn, this can't be good. Jesse muted the television and looked up at Valerie's tall form."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 19): "On seeing his adoptive daughter entering the kitchen for breakfast wearing her cheerleading uniform, Jake called out, 'Mornin' kiddo! I didn't know there was a game today?' 'No, Apa, There isn't.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen and Brother Grimace (parts 142 and 143): "The HARDLY WORKING was sailing along in the Gulf of Mexico, a beautiful sixty foot fiberglass yacht. The passengers had been invited and were for the most part trying to enjoy themselves, although most felt as if they had been dragged there." (Part 143)

Friday, August 3, 2018

Are There Ninety-Nine Bottles Of It On the Wall?


Looks like Brittany's been named Keg Queen this time, which means she's serving the drinks on International Beer Day. Either that or she's following in Ashley-Amber's footsteps as a St. Peter Girl beer model.

If you'd like something to go with your beer, today is also Grab Some Nuts Day so you should feel free to munch the nutty, nutty. I'm assuming--hoping--that the holiday refers to stuff like almonds and pecans, anyway.

Finally, today is the tenth anniversary of the episode "Write Where It Hurts," from 1998. In that episode, Daria struggled with writer's block. A struggle that many in the Daria fan community know all too well!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, August 1, 2018

No, Tiffany, That Mountain Does Not Make You Look Fat


Tiffany's celebrating National Mountain Climbing Day, but I hope she's being careful because the thinner air at that elevation might cause mental deterioration and--oh, never mind. On the bright side, if she falls off and lands on her head, there's not likely to be any serious damage.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 7): "Daria had insisted that the person to help Tom exit the hooch was going to be her. They stood in the airlock wearing their surface suits."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 3): "Erin finished typing the document, saved it and sent it to the printer. With that task complete she sat back with a contented smile. The job was going well. She was most of the way through her third week and she felt she made a Valuable Contribution."

  • Knight in shining armor, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Upchuck's car. Upchuck is driving. Daria and Quinn are huddled together at the backside. However, Daria has composed herself and put up a stoic front."

  • Return To Highland (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "There's a thin layer of snow on the ground and Christmas decorations on all the houses because it's December. Quinn and Jim are in the driveway loading their luggage into Quinn's car. They are obviously going on a road trip." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Brother Grimace and Roentgen (parts 140 and 141): "Danny stepped out of the bathroom in Quinn's apartment, dressed for the very first time in her Elite Academy uniform. 'So - what do you think?'" (Part 141)

Monday, July 30, 2018

I'll Be--Gahhh!


Jake's either a time-traveler from the future bent on destroying all squirrels or he's got a cool new cosplay for Arnold Schwarzenegger's birthday today. Then again, there's no reason it can't be both.

Meanwhile, Daria and Jane are probably celebrating International Day of Friendship by...eating pizza and watching Sick, Sad World, I imagine. It's not like either of them is into arbitrary holidays, after all.

Fandom News!

Saturday, July 28, 2018

But Don't Call Him a Cowboy Until You See Him Ride


Travis is here to tell us that today is not only National Day of the Cowboy, but also the anniversary of the episode "Speedtrapped," which aired on this day in 1999. I'm not sure Travis has very fond memories of that one, though--he very nearly became roadkill thanks to Daria's sudden homicidal urges. I mean, Travis and his country music were annoying, but not run-him-over-with-a-car annoying.

Fanfic Update!
  • Hunters and Lingerie (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn has just placed a tray of fudge brownies on the counter and is coating them in chocolate frosting. In front of her is a camcorder on a tripod. She finishes coating the brownies." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Knight in shining armor, by Rémi (parts 1 - 4): "Daria and Brittany are sharing a table in Ms. Defoe's class ; Daria is effortlessly drawing, while Brittany is having a tough time. Brittany : Perspective is hard." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria the Unreliable Narrator), by Szcz (COMPLETE!): "'So. What is next?' 'I think about something very impressive. Like a Brodway style musical. I can make some good special effects.'"

Thursday, July 26, 2018

Aunts at a Picnic


Amy and Rita are arguing about which of them has more right to celebrate National Aunt and Uncle's Day, and it's actually kind of hard to decide. I mean, Rita's not great but Amy barely recognized her own nieces at Erin's wedding, so I think it's a bit of a toss-up. Honestly, I just want to know why there are so few uncles on Daria.

On the subject of nasty blow-ups, today is also the anniversary of the episode "Fire!," which aired on this day in 2000. By blow-ups, do I mean Jake accidentally setting the kitchen on fire or Jane and Daria hurtling headlong toward disaster with Tom? Why not both?

Fandom News!

Tuesday, July 24, 2018

Two Wildly Different Humor Styles


Jesse's going to need yet another new shirt pretty soon as he impersonates Gallagher on the prop comic's birthday. I don't know if that's a greased-up Camp Grizzly watermelon or not, but either way things are about to get messy.

Speaking of comedy, today is also the fifth anniversary of the "Daria: High School Reunion" trailer from College Humor. The trailer was sadly fake, but now that there's a Daria revival in the works, maybe we'll finally get to see more of our favorite snarky teenager soon.

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 14): "Quinn tapped her foot, as she sat at the breakfast table, and clicked the pen she was using on and off with angry impatience."

  • A colossal jerk (Iron Chef: Daria the Unreliable Narrator), by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Daria : Excuse me. Tommy : You're kidding, right ? You think I'm going to talk to you ? (looks at Jane) You, maybe. Like, four hours into a kegger."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 44): "Lillian Barksdale sorted through her mail, setting the personal letters aside from bills, advertisements, and the usual assortment of charities pleasing for money."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 3): "Erin drifted awake. She allowed sounds to wash over her. The soft and rhythmic click that her fridge produced. The muted hum of the traffic outside. The muffled conversations below as the purchase of flowers took place."

  • I would put roses round our door (Iron Chef: Daria the Unreliable Narrator), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "'So, I met someone today. A guy.' 'Oh, that's good.' Her sardonic voice bounced around the pizza place, hollower than usual."

  • Old Friends/Bookends (Iron Chef: Daria the Unreliable Narrator), by Two-Eyed Charlie (COMPLETE!): "Jane never could get the hang of empathy, not until she met Daria. Then it was as easy as staring in the mirror, because to Jane, Daria was pretty much her worst fears brought to life."

  • Rise of Weirdness, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "It was early in the morning, but the Winchester Library of Magic was already busy, with more than a dozen people browsing the shelves."

  • Silent treatment, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "Jake is driving his daughters to school; Quinn is riding shotgun, Daria is in the back seat. Jake : Girls, I just want you to know your mother and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new town -- especially for you, Daria, right?" (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria the Unreliable Narrator), by OzFerret (COMPLETE!): "Please understand that I do not break student confidentiality lightly. I am driven to do so by the need to protect students everywhere."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria the Unreliable Narrator), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'So, welcome to Self-Esteem,' Timothy O'Neill said. 'This is sort of a group format. I know that all of you have been mandated to come and I know you don't want to be here. I suspect that there's a lot of anger.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 139): "An ambulance pulled up to the front of Cedars of Lawndale. A young woman, known for her celebrity and her side ponytails, watched as the back of the ambulance was unloaded."

Sunday, July 22, 2018

Lock Up Your Ritalin!


Today is Ratcatcher's Day, and it looks like at least one person could use some help in that department. Jake has a similar problem, except that his rats have fluffy tails and like to knock over his garbage cans.

Fandom News!

Friday, July 20, 2018

Not the Most Dignified Way to Feed a Sweet Tooth


Jane has the right idea for National Lollipop Day, but I think she's less likely to eat the candy than she is to whack whoever tricked her into wearing that dress and wig over the head with it.

Speaking of Jane, today is also the anniversary of the episode "See Jane Run," which aired on this day in 1998. Perhaps Evan, having eventually being revealed as a jerk, will be next in line for a candy clobbering.

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (parts 11 and 12): "'Um, I hope my parents didn't give you the third degree while you were waiting for me,' said Daria, as she and Trent drove out of her neighborhood. 'I would have been down sooner, but once Quinn saw that the only shoes of mine that she could match to your eyes were my combat boots, there was no stopping her.'" (Part 12)

  • Cuckoos On Infinite Earths, by Smijey and Erin M. (parts 24 and 25): "Janice knew that she was dreaming, this time. It didn't help." (Part 25)

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 2): "Erin hung her outside coat on the rack and placed her bag under her Desk. Still shivering she looked around the office. Why does anyone live this far north? It is so cold. They cannot all be escaping their grandmother."

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 20): "'Are you certain about this, young lady?' demanded Agent Flemming. 'Because making false statements towards the government is a serious federal crime.'"

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 18): "'Good news, szereto.' Elizaveta said as she spoke to her girlfriend over the phone. 'Anya and Apa agreed to me staying home instead of going camping with everyone else.'"

  • Strange Love (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Jim is opening presents in front of his parents, Tony and Gina. Also present are his brother, Chris, and his Uncle, Vito. It's Jim's sixteenth birthday. Jim opens one. It's a video game." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen and Brother Grimace (parts 137 and 138): "Sandi Griffin and Mack Mackenzie waited in the office reserved for them at the Legion Academy. 'Do you think that she knows what's coming?' Sandi said." (Part 138)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by OzFerret (COMPLETE!): "Jane Lane paced nervously around the quickly drawn meeting room. She was too agitated to sit. Where was he? He should have been here 15 minutes ago. This was a typical power play and it did not bode well."

  • The Wrath of Con (formerly Aurora), by Lady Evil (part 19): "Danny answered the door one Saturday to find Artie on his porch with a large grocery bag. 'Hey, Danny!' he said. 'Wanna make 520 bucks?'"

Wednesday, July 18, 2018

He Really Does Wish He Were an Oscar Mayer Wiener


Kevin's taking National Hot Dog Day to quite the extreme, but I must say it's a pretty appropriate alter ego when you think about it. At least we've been spared the Oscar Mayer Wiener Song, which I'm sure is part of his repertoire alongside such classics as "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall." Jake, I'm sure, has ordered another crate full of hot dogs to celebrate, unless he just typed in the wrong product number again. Damn fuzzy computer screen!

Fandom News!

Monday, July 16, 2018

Yesssssss, Eric?


Helen's really gone all out for World Snake Day, and there's a lawyer joke in there that I am definitely not going to stoop to make, no sir. Cough.

Today is also Global Hug Your Kids Day, and while Jake and Helen were known to give their kids the occasional hug on the show, I think Daria and Quinn would rather wait until Helen looks a little less like a boa constrictor.

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 9): "'A couple of best friends sharing shots... of gunfire! Vice Presidential Gunplay next on '"Sick, Sad World!"' Jane clicked off the TV, when she heard a knock on the door. 'Yo!' she called, allowing Trent into her room."

  • Disturbia (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "There is a "For Sale by Bank" sign in the front yard. A Prius pulls into the driveway, which is on the right side. This is followed by Jim's 1987 Camaro IROC-Z." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Jodie are best friends), by Szcz (COMPLETE!): "It was a boring young Democrats panel. Though there was an unusual element. The place. It was an Appalachian resort in '30 style. No. Not in style, it was an well functioning '30 resort with an original Art Deco building (like in Tim Burton's Batman, but not so grim)."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 136): "Rain was pouring over the windshield of the Gridrunner. Daria couldn't look outside and see the runway if she wanted to."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XV: A New Era In Crossovers), by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "'So now our allies, the Tramani, think of Quinn as a hero who saved their planet.' Li said, looking over the report."

Saturday, July 14, 2018

No Nudes is Good Nudes!


I have no idea how Jane talked Daria into observing National Nude Day, but it looks like Daria is already regretting her decision. Just remember the sage advice of Brittany Taylor: only do a nude scene if it's crucial to your character.

Today is also the anniversary of both episodes "The Teachings of Don Jake" and "Lane Miserables," which aired on this day in 1997 and 1999. Both episodes gave us an extra glimpse into Jane and Trent's family, and neither one was very flattering.

Fandom News!

Thursday, July 12, 2018

Metalmouth Should Consider Green For That Touch of Exotica That Many Young Psychopaths Crave


Mr. DeMartino is celebrating Different Colored Eyes Day, although I don't know if "bulging" counts as a color. I suppose "bloodshot" does, though. He might want to have a talk with Quinn about colored contact lenses, which of course will lead into a conversation about changing hairstyles and getting a whole new wardrobe and oops I think the eye just popped out entirely.

Of course, I should point out that the picture is technically of Metalmouth, which is appropriate because today is also the anniversary of the episode "Legends of the Mall," which aired on this day in 2000. Metalmouth made his only appearance there, as did the Rattling Girl of Lawndale and the House of Bad Grades. Lawndale sure is full of urban legends that were never ever mentioned again, huh?

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 8): "'YOO HOO! SIS!" 'Agh!' Quinn woke up with a fright. Her head was throbbing. The sunlight pouring through her bedroom window hurt her eyes."

  • Coffee, by Zetor (part 2g): "'I guess so,' Stacy agreed, giving Daria's hand a final squeeze before letting go and standing up. 'I'm going to go take the turkey out. Can you take those to the kitchen?' she asked, gesturing to the now mostly empty plate and mugs on the coffee table."

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 6): "Daria watched as the last bucket of regolith was poured on top of the High Oxygen Outland Central Habitat or HOOCH for short."

  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 20): "'You two seem better,' Jane spoke to her sister in law while they shared a glass of tea for Jane and water for the extremely pregnant mother to be."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 1): "Erin held the paycheck in both hands and read her name again. They would have the bank details in their system next week. 'Yes. Finally getting my own life back' she thought."

  • Jenna – Just your regular spellslinging gal, by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "A lot of stories begin with a tragedy. Or a joke. One of the two is the classical move in storytelling and often set's the entire theme for the story which will follow." (Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Quinn The Matchmaker (Quinn, Season 5), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Daria is in her room reading a book. Her look is a little different. Her glasses are wire frams but instead of a sweater or a bulky green jacket she's wearing a green t-shirt that, while not super tight, does reveal that she has curves." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Brother Grimace (part 135): "'Oh, my. That's a sight that brings back memories.'"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "'I don't like this red one. It makes you look...tacky.' 'Nathan, I like this dress. You know, red lips, red soul, favourite colour and all that jazz.' Jane smiled as she saw herself."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by OzFerret (COMPLETE!): "Trent listened to the stranger on the phone. Trent replied. 'I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my sister go now, that'll be the end of it.'"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "'Have I mentioned your dad's modifications to the staircase are much appreciated?' Daria asked Jane as the pair stared out the window."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria was unpacking her stuff in her dorm room at Raft when a knock came at the door. 'Come in, it's unlocked,' she called out."

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Hot as Helen


Helen's doing a visual representation of Death Valley on this day in 1913, when the record hottest temperature there was recorded: 134 °F (56.7 °C). The next time you're sweating out the summer heat without air conditioning, remind yourself that it could be worse. By which I mean you could be wearing an embarrassing outfit like Helen's in public.

Fandom News!

Sunday, July 8, 2018

Just Don't Paint a Video Game


Jake's taken Body Painting Day to an extreme, or at least I hope that's just body paint. If those are tattoos then he and Helen are going to have a serious disagreement as soon as she gets home.

Daria, meanwhile, is settling in for some quality time with Cannibal Fragfest for Video Games Day. Unless Ted talks her into joining him in some virtual reality, that is.

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 6): "'I'm just saying that if I were your consultant, I'd give your line something a bit more... edgy! Like The Elegante,' said Jake, throwing around his fall-back pitch to his latest client."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (parts 42 and 43): "The Morgendorffers were tired after their drive from Coalton, their adventures at Gettysburg, and dinner at Pizza Forest. Still, a good night's sleep did wonders—at least for some people." (Part 43)

  • My Breast Fiend, by Smijey (parts 7 - 9): "Darius rang the doorbell; within moments, Brittany answered. 'Darius, you're here!' she said happily. 'I'm so glad. Now we're even!' 'This is Jane --' Darius said, trying to introduce his friend." (Part 8) (Part 9)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Brother Grimace and Roentgen (parts 133 and 134): "Daria smiled at the image of Michael Fulton - now, First Lieutenant Fulton, U.S. Air Force - on the view-screen in the Conference Room; her phone was on a cradle set on the table before her, which connected it to the screen. 'So, you're getting to stay with the assignment you wanted all along?'" (Part 134)

Friday, July 6, 2018

A Rash of Artwork


It's Frida Kahlo's birthday, and Jane has found a special way to mark the occasion. Also...is that Trent's head on the deer in the Wounded Deer painting? I feel like maybe there's something significant there, but I'm not a psychologist.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Ill," which aired on this day in 1998. That strange rash was never adequately explained, and the mystery haunts me to this day.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, July 4, 2018

Happy Fourth!


Jane's feeling patriotic for Independence Day, and to all the Daria fans in the U.S., I hope it's a happy one for you! I'm not sure exactly what the Holiday Island version of Independence Day would be like, but I assume alcohol and pyrotechnics would be involved. If you're in the mood for a holiday celebration then feel free to start with this selection of Fourth-of-July themed fanfics:

Fanfic Update!
  • Aurora, by Lady Evil (part 18): "'What are you gonna do tonight?' Jane asked Trent in their living room. 'Play hockey, I guess.' he said. He was wearing the red and black jersey and pads the station provided for him."

  • Because I Got High, by ladylace616 (COMPLETE!): "The group decided to watch the movie Pineapple Express together one evening."

  • Cuckoos On Infinite Earths, by Smijey and Charles RB (parts 20 - 23): "'Girls, I just want you to know your mother and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new town,' Janice Walker told her two daughters." (Part 21) (Part 23)

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 19): "'So, uh, these two are Beavis and Butt-head?' Tom looked at the two, scratching his head. Kevin and Tom both examined Beavis and Butt-head."

  • My Breast Fiend, by Smijey (part 6): "'You can't go!' Quinn cried out. 'You'll ruin everything!' Darius gave Jane an I-told-you-this-was-a-bad-idea-now-can-I-just-get-into-a-bathtub-with-a-plugged-in-toaster-oven look, but she paid him no mind."

  • Options, by Brother Grimace (parts 9 - 11): "'Hey! Asshole! Move your fucking crutches!' Luttrell Ingram Thompson (he went by his full name, as he hadn't been close enough to anyone in years to have picked up a nickname, or any other term of friendship or endearment) left his train of thought at the sound of the voice, and moved his forearm crutches from where they had slipped out into the aisle of the bus." (Part 10) (Part 11)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (parts 131 and 132): "For the second year in a row, the Legionnaires prepared to meet in their new space-age meeting room. Daria joked that it was the 'room from the future'." (Part 132)

Monday, July 2, 2018

Keep Watching the Skies!


Either Daria has a secret she's never told us or she's gotten really into that UFO convention this year. Either way, it's a good way to celebrate World UFO Day, unless you're Artie, in which case a better way would be to panic and go hide under your bed.

If any UFOs do show up, perhaps they'll return Amelia Earhart, who disappeared on this day in 1937.

Fandom News!

Saturday, June 30, 2018

Why, Helen, You Grow Lovelier By the Day!


Helen and Jake look surprisingly cute together, which is weird because Rhett and Scarlett from Gone with the Wind had a very unhealthy relationship. Still, the book was published on this day in 1936, and considering how often the book and/or movie were referenced on Daria it would be wrong not to mention it today.

This is also the anniversary of the episode "The Big House," which aired on this day in 1997. I still want to know the story behind the "No pimple pads in the toilet" rule.

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (parts 3 - 5): "'Oh, so that's what you meant,' said Stacy, who was looking through Quinn's closest for an outfit to borrow for tonight's party." (Part 4) (Part 5)

  • First contact, by OzFerret (COMPLETE!): "His heart pounded in his chest, drowning out all other noises. He shook his head. 'How was he supposed to listen for intruders with all this noise?' he wondered."

  • My Breast Fiend, by Smijey (parts 4 and 5): "Darius opened the front door reluctantly, as he always did on school days, and was surprised to see Jane standing there in her running clothes. 'Hey, Darius!' she greeted, in a tone far too cheerful for before noon. 'Today, I'm going to help you start training your speed!'" (Part 5)

  • Options, by Brother Grimace (parts 7 and 8): "'Get up, small person.' Julia Carlyle opened her eyes, and saw - for the last time - the sun shine into her dorm room on the tenth floor of Schmidt Hall... her home, more or less, for the last five years." (Part 8)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 130): "The Ad-Hoc Committee on Admissions to the Legion Academy met. They had received hundreds of applications from metahumans all over the world. From this list, they would have to whittle the final number down to just twenty-five."

Thursday, June 28, 2018

Pierced Brains, Anyone?


Daria's showing off her tribute to International Body Piercing Day, and Jane looks distinctly unimpressed about it. No need to worry, though: I'm sure E.T. and his magic healing powers will take care of that soon.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Psycho Therapy," which aired on this day in 2000. No one got pierced, but a lot of egos got punctured in that one. That group role-playing session...damn.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, June 26, 2018

Thank Goodness for Quinn's High Pain Tolerance for Hair-Care Treatments!


Let's wish a happy Beautician's Day to Jozu and all the other long-suffering workers who have to endure Quinn's endless prattling as they do their best to make her look perfect--or at least cuter than Sandi. If you visit the beautician today, remember to tell them which show you want your style from. Or you could just offer to buy some scissors from them.

Today is also National Chocolate Pudding Day, and I join Brittany and Daria in hoping that your pudding doesn't have any skin on the top. Ewwww.

Finally, happy anniversary to Jake and Helen, who made their "Vows of Commitment" on this day in 1975. I hope Jake got Helen something better than a misshapen hobbit candle this time.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cuckoos On Infinite Earths, by Smijey (part 19): "Daria and Jane hadn't expected to be watching the new Pope's address live, but then again, back in high school they had campaigned the yearbook staff to have her be titled Most Likely To Be The Literal Anti-Christ."

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 5): "Daria stood looking out over the rim of the crater recording video. The display in her helmet showed the view through the camera attached to her chest plate."

  • Jersey Sure (Quinn, Season 4), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Jim's Camaro driving along the street. Cut to inside and we see Jim driving while Quinn's in the passenger seat. They're on their way home from a night out. Quinn: Thanks for taking me to Cest La Ve, Jim." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Proof through the Esteem, by WalterKovacs (COMPLETE!): "'Girls, I just want you to know that your mother and I both realize it's not easy moving to a new town,' started Jake Morgendorffer from behind the wheel of his car."

  • Unnamed story (All-Purpose Creative Writing Thread: Seven), by Aloysius (part 1): "David looked at the growing white mass ahead of them and froze in shock. His son, Nigel, saw his father's expression fall momentarily, then it solidified again as he looked at his family and the other refugees gathered around him."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Jodie are best friends), by Roentgen (part 2): "The car pulled up to the dual garage of the Morgendorffer residence. It was a Jaguar XJ30. Daria could see through the window that Andrew Landon and Jodie Landon were ready to pick her up."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by peapotmaster (COMPLETE!): "DARIA: Dad, what is the name of this camp again? JAKE: Your mom said it is called Camp Campbell."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "'More coffee! Please!' Charles shouted. 'Daria?' Jane asked, noticing Daria had yet to touch her drink. 'I've never had coffee.' Daria answered, 'Amy said a young lady shouldn't drink stimulants.'"

Sunday, June 24, 2018

She Doesn't Have Time for Happy Thoughts


Jodie's apparently joined the Mythical Creature Club in time for International Fairy Day, but I don't think even a magic wand will be enough to get her parents off her back. Still, the wings will be nice for when she's running late for a school activity, so it's not a total loss.

Speaking of activities, today is also Swim a Lap Day, so join Sandi for a dip in the pool and see if you can shed some of that awful above-one-hundred-pounds weight. I'm sure Quinn will be there to hurl abuse--I mean, offer supportive encouragement.

Fandom News!

Friday, June 22, 2018

Girls Just Wanna Be Retro


The Fashion Club is taking some fashion tips from a few decades ago in honor of Cyndi Lauper's 65th birthday! Of course, if they actually hear "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" then I'd suggest that they run, because it means Metalmouth is sure to be nearby.

Today is also Carson Daly's birthday, and he's best known within Daria canon as the voice of David Sorenson from Is It Fall Yet? David was notable in being among the very few guys to resist Quinn's charms, as well as to actually earn Daria's respect.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cuckoos On Infinite Earths, by Smijey (part 18): "At the Hoover Dam, Janice took her first opportunity to split off from the tour group, dragging Beavis behind her, and marched into the nearest bathroom. 'Heh-heh, hey!' he protested as she locked the door."

  • Fading Memories (Quinn, Season 4), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn Morgendorffer is running scared in a large cave with lakes of molten lava all around her. The screams of unbearable pain can be heard all around her. Her path is suddenly blocked by a red skinned monster with a pointed tail, bat wings and huge horns." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 18): "'Wow, this place looks... Orwellian,' Tom's eyes widened. He had just pulled up in front of Highland High and to the surprise of all three Lawndale residents, Highland had been transformed from a seemingly impoverished small town school to a more modern institution."

  • Jodie the rebel (Jodie Landon - Rebel), by Wassersauefer (part 1): "It wasn't like she had planned it all along. Unlike what she usually did, this time Jodie simply acted. Normaly she would take long hours of thinking every decision through, making lists with pros and cons and finally settling on a course of action, always going for the best outcome possible and the most effective way of reaching it."

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 17): "'This could get to be a habit, szereto.' Elizaveta smiled as she caressed the cheek of the girl lying in bed next to her. 'Then it's a habit I don't ever want to give up.' Angie smiled back as she gave her girlfriend a kiss."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Jodie are best friends), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'God, I hope that's not the booster society again,' Quinn said, disgusted. Wow, you show up the first day and they're all over you."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 129): "It was going to be an early breakfast for Charles Ruttheimer. He was on an early flight to Massachusetts, to complete his final act as Deputy Leader for the Legion."

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

"It's a tooth."


Daria and Jane have made a questionable decision to celebrate the anniversary of Jaws's 1975 premiere by paying Joanna a visit. I would think it would be more fun to actually watch the movie than to watch some poor delusional woman act it out for them, but to each their own.

Fandom News!

Monday, June 18, 2018

Maybe Just Stick to Pizza Instead?


Jake must have decided that it's safer to be sushi than to eat sushi, which is true of Tokyo Toby's, anyway. If you decide to eat sushi today, be sure to avoid any restaurant with questionable health ratings!

Speaking of Jake's disastrous experience with Tokyo Toby's, today is the anniversary of the episode "My Night at Daria's," in which poor Jake not only got food poisoning but had a very uncomfortable couple of days after Daria and Tom got caught sleeping together. Literally.

Fanfic Update!
  • An Annoying Paradise, by Resop (part 9): "Daria reaches into her locker to get a book. 'Dar-Dar!' 'What is it, Manako?' 'Which song would you like to do?'"

  • My Breast Fiend, by Smijey (part 3): "Mack led Darius into the weight room, a room just off the gymnasium that Darius had never been inside before. 'I'm sorry about laughing, Darius. It's just, well...you, you know?'"

  • Nurse Quinn (Quinn, Season 4), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Jim lays unconscious in a hospital bed while a visibly sleep deprived Quinn, wearing the same outfit she wore that night at Chez Pierre, watches over him. Helen enters the room." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 128): "On a Saturday in Lawndale, the commencement exercises for the Lawndale High School Class of '18 were being held in the same location as every other graduation ceremony - the football field."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'You're in a desert, walking along in the sand, when all of a sudden you look down...' 'Which one?' Daria interrupted. Manson sucked breath in through her teeth. 'It doesn't make any difference what desert, Dora, it's completely hypothetical.'"

Saturday, June 16, 2018

So Cute You Could Scream


Looks like Jeffy's going to win that free T-shirt for National Hollerin' Contest Day, unless he passes out from the effort. Still, I'd put money on Jake. That dude's been preparing for this moment all his life, so all he has to do is summon up his least favorite memory of Mad Dog and this contest is over.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Too Cute," which aired on this day in 1997. I don't remember any hollering in that episode, but I'm sure Upchuck felt like screaming when he found out what that blob Daria and Jane were looking at was.

Fandom News!

Thursday, June 14, 2018

QB Chameleon


I'm not sure Kevin even knows who Boy George is, but he sure seems happy as his alter ego on the singer's 57th birthday. Don't get me wrong: I doubt Kevin has anything in particular against new wave, but his musical tastes run more along the lines of "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall."

Fanfic Update!
  • bones cast in a little low, by ashleykay (part 4): "The rain stopped suddenly late on a Wednesday afternoon. As if the sky had choked and stuttered. And the weeks of wet flooded earth was a mirage."

  • Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 11): "Daria flipped on the TV, and was treated to a whole twelve seconds of Alanis Morissette's Ironic video before the signal was lost, to be replaced with static."

  • Coffee, by Zetor (part 2f): "Taking Stacy's lighthearted response as a cue, Daria kept up the shift in mood and dryly joked, 'So, do we have time for another movie, or did revealing our deepest secrets take up too much time?'"

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 41): "The Morgendorffers pulled away from the curb, turned left, then right, then turned left again and onto the main highway leading out of town. There was a sort of finality to this visit, and Daria wondered if she'd ever see Coalton again."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (parts 126 and 127): "Brittany Taylor dropped by the office of Magnolia 'Mags' Regmond, formerly of USAES, the Air Force, and the Pentagon (MAJ, Ret.) Mags was now the public relations officer for the National Legion Chapter One." (Part 127)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Szcz (COMPLETE!): "Helen Morgendorffer disliked to go to an office, so she has chosen the work at home. It could be described as living in an office through, because her home was the Lawndale Social Re-adaptation Centre."

Tuesday, June 12, 2018

Roses Are Red....


Kevin and his fantasy girlfriend (does he really have any other kind, Brittany included?) are happily celebrating Red Rose Day. Meanwhile, Tom should probably fish the roses he got for Daria out of the garbage just in case this is one of the days that she likes sentimental yet meaningless holidays.

Fandom News!

Sunday, June 10, 2018

Have a Spicy Holiday!


Jake is busy in the kitchen on Herbs and Spices Day, but on behalf of his tongue I would like to request that he take it easy on the pepper this time. His last surviving taste buds will thank me.

Fanfic Update!
  • Aurora (formerly Reflections), by Lady Evil (part 17): "Jane and Vixx were in Jane's room getting dressed for Halloween while 'Zombie' by The Cranberries played on the radio. 'Ah, the perfect Halloween song.' said Jane, pinning her hair up. 'A song all about the gang wars in Ireland.'"

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 4): "'So how is life on Mars?' Jane asked."

  • Identity Crisis (Quinn, Season 4), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Jeffy is at a table with his lawyer, a sleazy looking guy with slicked back hair. The judge, a balding fat man with a mustache, is presiding while Dr. Millepedis is in the witness stand. It is a mental competency hearing to determine whether Jeffy, after two years confinement in a psychiatric hospital, can now be safely re-intigrated into society." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Redemption, by atimnie (part 32): "'Alright, Doyle, we want names,' Hank Daniels shouted at Doyle, still in Amos Cunningham's uniform, one arm cuffed to the bolted down chair he was sitting in. 'You can have mine, I was getting tired of it anyway.'"

  • Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 16): "'Thanks for the lift, Mack. 'Night, Jodie.' Elizaveta smiled as she got out of Mack's car. Then, leaning over, she gave Angie a kiss on the lips, 'See you tomorrow, szereto.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (parts 124 and 125): "Daria and Tom sat in the expensive office of the chief executive officer of an important international firm. This wasn't the first such visit that either of them had made to a CEO. Although it was rare that specific Legionnaires had been asked to come for a visit." (Part 125)