Friday, June 23, 2017

Feeling in the Pink


Quinn is celebrating in her room, also known as The Temple of Pink, for National Pink Day. I think Daria would rather keep her distance from this one, but she might like National Columnists Day, considering that was her chosen profession in her future story from "Write Where It Hurts." Perhaps she could write a column about the homicidal urges triggered by the color pink?

Fandom News!

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

They Only Do the Fashionable Yoga Poses


The Fashion Club is getting surprisingly physical for International Yoga Day, but I suppose they've gotta work off those carrot sticks and diet soda somehow. Too bad Daria went off the air before the advent of selfies, or the girls would most certainly be posting pictures of themselves working out on social media for National Selfie Day. I think we're all grateful for that missed opportunity.

Fanfic Update!
  • 600 Years Afterward..... (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'I think it's a time capsule.' 'What's a time capsule?' 'Oh, it's some thing people did back in, uh, 19th, 20th century. You bury it for a few decades and they can see what the past was like. A no-tech Wayback.'"

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (parts 15 - 16b): "It was early June. The children were bored and restless behind their desks, even the better-behaved ones. It seemed like forever until the school bell rang in the later afternoon, but it finally did ring." (Part 16a) (Part 16b)

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 35b): "'Those were two of the assistants from the production team for Miss Betty and Sally M', Rod said in answer to the question Dylan had just asked him. 'I was giving them directions. Mr Chung's given them a room to work from.'"

  • The Gift (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "Daria sat down at the kitchen table next to her sister for breakfast like any other morning. Helen entered the kitchen glues to her phone per usual but stopped and was agape at what she saw."

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 6): "Daria walked into the building at 8:59 am. Hattie was waiting for her in the lobby. Looking at the clock on the wall Hattie exclaimed, 'Good Morning, Daria. You are the first one here. If the others aren't here in 6 minutes they will be out of the running. Are you ready to do some work today?'"

  • Magician's Code, by Crow-Black Dream (parts 1 - 5): "Charles 'Upchuck' Ruttheimer III was and always had been too poetic for most people. Partnered with flaming red curls and freckles peppering his large dimpled cheeks, this tendency toward speaking in flowery prose proved too much for any one of his peers for as long as he could remember, regardless of his inherent cheerful disposition." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)

  • A Silver Penny, by Shiva (parts 1 and 2): "'Oh, honey? Don't drink from that big bottle in the kitchen; it's silver nitrate.' Jane's father said from within the only bathroom in the house." (Part 2)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "'OK, students, settle down!' Ms. Li called from the podium. As the student body ignored her, she grew increasingly agitated, until finally snapping."

Monday, June 19, 2017

Kiss and Tell


Helen is having a hard time dealing with the fact that today is National Kissing Day, but I think she'll get over it. Honestly, she looks less like she's shocked and more like she's trying not to throw up. Daria and Tom might need to work on their technique.

Jake, meanwhile, is probably having a fantastic National Martini Day, and might even have taken the opportunity to make an entire pitcher, with or without a visit from Aunt Rita. Don't forget the olives, Jake!

Fandom News!

Saturday, June 17, 2017

Or You Could Holler at Your Vegetables


Jeffy's in it to win on National Hollerin' Contest Day, and while he's doing pretty well I think he's going to have a hard time defeating either Jake or Mr. DeMartino. Still, points for effort. I can't help but wonder if he's channeling a little bit of suppressed rage at Quinn right now.

Today is also Eat Your Vegetables Day. If you brought a bag of vegetables to the "Food in Film" Festival to throw at the screen during Andre Sakarynsky's Last Meal, then you might want to save a couple of them for a snack.

Fanfic Update!
  • Of Inhuman Bonding, by Kristen Bealer (part 2): "'What do you mean, you don't have it?' Jake demanded at the hotel check-in desk. 'One room, king-sized bed. Morgendorffer. "M" as in--' 'I've got this, Jake,' Helen said, stepping forward and gently guiding Jake to the side."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "This year's Lawndale High Talent Exhibition had been interesting to say the least. Everyone was still talking about Sandi Griffin's boarder-line X-rated Burlesque performance of The Scorpions' 'Rock You Like a Hurricane'."

Thursday, June 15, 2017

No Cookie is Worth THAT!


Okay, Daria, we get it. It's Smile Power Day. Now please, for all of our sakes, tone it down a few notches! You're freaking us all out here.

Today is also Global Wind Day and, fortunately, it's referring to the energy source and not Jane's oldest brother. I think the idea of multiple Wind Lanes all over the world is even more disturbing than Daria's smile.

Finally, on this day sixteen years ago, something significant happened in Angelinhel's story "61501." I'm not going to spoil it by telling you what it is, though!

Fandom News!

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

What's Cooking?


Jake's whipping up a special meal for National Kitchen Klutzes of America Day, but I don't think he'll have any takers to try it. I sense a pizza delivery order in the Morgendorffers' future. Don't worry, though, Jake; after turning your tongue black with Kitchen Sink Stew, the hot dog fiasco, and almost burning the kitchen down entirely, I think you've got the title all sewn up.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 27): "As Carrie and Kira sat in yet another motel, they channel surfed, seeing the burning farm on every news channel."

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 35): "Lawndale High was the first school in the whole State with bomb-sniffing dogs. What a coup! That would help to cement Mr Chung's reputation."

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 5): "Back in the cubicle Daria worked on completing her piece about the paintball fieldtrip. Daria looked at the clock on her computer when she finished her work. There was about 15 minutes left until the deadline."

  • The More Things Change, by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 8): "I would love to tell you that, when I finally got to my apartment, I entered with all the vigor of victorious General and marched towards my destiny like the subject of a religious painting."

  • Of Inhuman Bonding, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "'God forbid I should count on anyone!' Jake raged at no one in particular, furious that Helen had backed out of going to the Eatertainment Conference with him."

  • That Bitter Memory (Hiding in Plain Sight (Alternate LLH, Plot Bunny to Kill)), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "The young woman - barely into her teens, with the occasional spot of acne and the lanky, awkward appearance of someone going through their growth spurt - brushed dirt from the sleeve of the painfully canary-yellow prison uniform she wore as she picked herself up from the ground."

  • Unnamed story (Hiding in Plain Sight (Alternate LLH, Plot Bunny to Kill)), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'This is what we live for,' Chief Petty Officer Morris said. 'We are facing the most dangerous game. This jabrone, whoever he is, he isn't facing some gun-toting thug. He's facing the Navy Seals. The best of the best.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 22): "Daria had told the Legion the prognosis on Bai Zheng. The plan was to depart at 5 pm and head back to the tower."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "'OK, class,' Lawndale's history teacher Alexander Jericho announced, 'We have a new student joining us today. Daria Morgendorffer, please raise your hand.'"

  • A Young Cynic's Mix (Black Daria), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "The woman finished putting sunscreen on a tow-headed boy of about five and directed him to play where she could see him. She stood up and smiled at Jake. 'So you're new in town? I'm Melody Ratzlaff.'"

Sunday, June 11, 2017

Aloha! I Mean, If That's Okay With You, Sandi


Stacy's got the moves for Kamehameha Day, a Hawaiian state holiday, but I think Sandi might have a few words for her on the subject of her fashion choices. Then again, after Stacy's turnabout at the magic show, she might keep her mouth shut on this one.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode Prize Fighters," which aired on this day in 2001. Daria, Jodie, and Upchuck compete for a scholarship while Jake finds a few hundred new ways to prepare hot dogs. Care for a wasabi gummy-fish imported from Tokyo?

Fandom News!

Friday, June 9, 2017

"All hail, Pippi Longstocking!"


Daria's reliving one of the least enjoyable moments of her life, as seen in the episode "Pinch Sitter," which aired on this day in 1997. It was a very educational episode: we learned about Jake's distaste for Couples Therapy Night, we used the word indemnification in a sentence, and we found out that Hitler ate sugar. Not to mention getting just a little too much information about Helen's personal life.

Fanfic Update!
  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 15): "My decision isn't meant to be malicious; I hope that you believe that. If anything, this decision is made out of complete and total pure love for all parties concerned... Look at you, so small, so perfect."

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 2): "'My Daria, you've been improving drastically,' Aunt Amy walked up to her niece who was practicing with Ted. Daria grapped with Ted as Amy watched. Finally, she managed to get a grip around Ted's waist and throw him to the floor."

  • Remote Control (Daria and the Gang Thread II), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'So, guess what?' Robert said. 'I'm going out with Quinn Morgendorffer.' Robert expected some congratulations, high fives, even balloons falling from the ceiling. They could have least rang a bell in his honor. Instead, his co-workers Roberto and Ross gave his a perplexed look."

  • That's awful, but is it art? (Iron Chef: Vulgarity), by tjdolf (COMPLETE!): "The scene is Da Foe's art class. Upchuck comes in, bringing a huge canvas in wrapping paper. The rest of the class are already there, painting away. He unwraps it and places it on an easel, away from the viewers."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 20 and 21): "'It would be interesting,' Jodie Landon said, 'to talk to a two-thousand year old man.' 'Yeah, I suppose so,' Jane said." (Part 21)

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

"Ding-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling? A-ling?"


Mack doesn't seem to be enjoying National Chocolate Ice Cream Day, but it might just be because that appears to be strawberry. Don't worry, though, in a few years he'll team up with Kevin to make millions on Bro and QB's Firstdown Fudge.

But looking back at the past, today is the anniversary of Beau Brummell's birth in 1778. Brummell's upper class status, good looks, and fashion sense would probably have the Fashion Club swooning, but I'm afraid the age difference is a little too insurmountable.

Fandom News!

Monday, June 5, 2017

Economists and Environmentalists


Mrs. Bennett just asked the class what economist was born today, and it's a trick question because there are two of them: Adam Smith in 1723 and John Maynard Keynes in 1883. The real trick, of course, is that practically no one in that classroom has ever heard of either of them.

Today is also World Environment Day, so, you know, don't pollute or anything. After all, "fashion is fun and everything, but we should really do something about the rainforest and stuff."

Fanfic Update!
  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 4): "Mr. Bergen's office was in stark contrast to the rest of the building. It was large and clearly he liked leather furniture. His taste also included oriental rugs and antiques – and not antiques as in old half-broken office furniture!"

  • The More Things Change (Iron Chef: The New Canon), by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 8): "Back in the Bronx, Brittany was ordering the two of us food and simultaneously calling up to Kevin to make sure everything was alright with him and the kids."

  • A.R.C CHAPTER 9 Babysitting, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Shortly after dinnertime the phone rang at the Hecuba home. 'I got it, this must be Daria.' Andrea said before answering the phone."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Captain Marbles (COMPLETE!): "Jane was flying through the air in that super outfit from her fifth season alter egos as the announcer's voice filled the air:"

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "The four girls, two of whom were feathered, walked into the building. Despite the tree growing through the center, the walls were still lined with bookshelves, all of which were filled."

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Happy Happy Birthday Birthday, Ginsberg Ginsberg!


So, this blog post was supposed to be posted yesterday. I'd like to give you an exciting explanation involving ninjas and bare-knuckled fistfights, but the reality is that I just forgot about it. So, just pretend that you're reading this yesterday. It's a very special time-travel episode of the Daria Fandom Blog!

Daria's doing a special reading of "Howl" in honor of Allen Ginsberg's birth on this day in 1926, but it's not going over so well. Maybe if she threw in some Melody Powers references it would be better received.

I don't think she should try reading it a second time, even though today is National Repeat Day. Instead, she should join Jane in a nice round of echolalia. Echolalia.

Fandom News!

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Got Milk?


Jake's going all out for World Milk Day, but I hope he doesn't spill it. Not because I'm worried he'll cry over it (although he might), but because I fear he'll set the kitchen on fire again if he tries to clean it up.

Also on this day in 1997, The Washington Post published an article about Daria. It's an interesting look at the show from the early days, and if you haven't read it yet I recommend it.

Fanfic Update!
  • And You Are? (Iron Chef : Daria and Helen have the same age), by neonhomer (part 1): "Helen Morgendorffer sat at her desk as she was shuffling papers into order. 'Oh sure Eric, I'll be more than happy to come in late and finish the Hansen case.' She said aloud."

  • Division I Recruiting, by Brother Grimace (part 1): "Mack Mackenzie glanced over at the pretty, light-skinned Black girl with the mass of shaggy, brownish hair tied back into a heavy ponytail. He noted that her friends kept turning her back towards him and the cadet beside him, and her blush kept getting deeper each time she made eye contact with him."

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 3): "In the conference area Hattie was setting up submarine sandwiches on a long side table. She had brought the sandwiches in from a nearby deli. A couple of the other writers were already there and looking over Hattie's shoulder."

  • No Bad Deed Goes Unrewarded (Iron Chef: Mack's Dark Side), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Mack was fuming as he walked to school. How dare she? he thought as he stormed down the street. It's bad enough that she decided to dump me completely out of nowhere, but over the phone? First thing in the morning? She couldn't even wait another hour to tell me to my face?"

  • On The Road, by elainefr (part 42): "'I really wish that you hadn't gone there Quinn,' Stacey told her over the phone. 'Max has enough going on- with the tour- and stuff.'"

  • Tyranny of Evil Men (Iron Chef: Mack's Dark Side), by Two-Eyed Charlie (COMPLETE!): "Mack pushed open the door of Lawndale's lone Blockbuster, a VHS copy of Muppet Treasure Island tucked under his arm, and quietly made his way to the return slot."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "Far away in some medieval Fantasy setting. 'So let me get this straight....' Jane muttered turning to Daria and Tom."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "'Good news, everybody!' Jane yelled to the gathered Daria cast. 'We're getting a new show!' 'What? That's amazing!' Jake said. 'When! Where!'"

  • What really happened to Tommy Sherman (Iron Chef: Mack's Dark Side), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "Tommy Sherman laid at the base of goal post in Lawndale's stadium barely conscious with the detached goal laying nearby. He had hit it going all out like many times in the past during his glorious high school career, however he never expected it to break like it did."

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Honest Andrea


Andrea's looking very stately in honor of the Lincoln Memorial, which was dedicated on this day in 1922. Either she's rejected the goth lifestyle in favor of an unusual fad or she's found a clever way to get out of working at Payday.

It was also on this day in 1431 that Joan of Arc was burned at the stake. The event was remarked on by Daria and Jane in the episode "Arts 'N Crass":

Jane: You're a real Joan of Arc, you know that?

Daria: Yeah...and I think I just ordered a stake.


Fandom News!

Sunday, May 28, 2017

Vroom, Vroom!


Stacy's thrilled to race in the Indianapolis 500, which starts today! I shudder to think what Sandi would say about her clothes and dirty face, but take a look at Stacy and consider whether or not she cares right now.

Today is also the anniversary of the birth of Ian Fleming, whose James Bond character undoubtedly played a part in inspiring Daria's Melody Powers stories. If I remember right, Upchuck is also a fan, which makes me wonder what his reaction to Melody would be. On second thought, perhaps we're better off not knowing.

Finally, today is the anniversary of the episode "Life in the Past Lane," which aired on this day in 2001. We got to meet Nathan, who is among the least-liked characters in fandom. But hey, at least he's more popular than Ken Edwards!

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 26): "The corridors around the dormitories had gotten a bit smoky with that acetylene cylinder had been burning away until Carrie telekinetically shut it off from the washroom."

  • Daria's Life's Lottery, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "At least Jodie's at Grove Hill. There's one friendly face – also Upchuck's there, heyoooo – in amongst a sea of assholes." (Part 8) (Part 9)

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 1): "And so it began. After four years of high school, Daria was finally where she wanted to be, in college."

  • Fidelity, Integrity, Bravery And So On... (Hiding in Plain Sight), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Happy birthday, Carlyle.' Julia Carlyle didn't even look up as Tobias Fornell tossed a package onto the table next to the chaise lounge on which she reclined. 'Nice furniture, kid. Teak?'"

  • Greater Love, by arandomshipper (part 2): "A typical family dinner that night saw Jake alternating between blissful inanities and sudden angry outbursts, while Helen's attempts to start meaningful conversations were constantly interrupted by phone calls."

  • Slap, by elainefr (part 1): "Slap! The sound could be heard from across the room where Jane was standing and talking two new prospective dates at the party that she was attending."


Friday, May 26, 2017

Ride, Janey, Ride!


Jane's blasting off into space in honor of the late astronaut Sally Ride, who was born on this day in 1951. The first American woman in space, the third woman in space, and the first known LGBT astronaut. In the words of Ms. Barch: you go, girl!

If space travel isn't your thing, today is also the anniversary of John Wayne's birth in 1907. I know Jake was a fan, as his collectible coins can demonstrate, but do we have any fans out there? Show of hands in the comments!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, May 24, 2017

We Are Not Amused...Hey, Ziggy!


Jake is looking regal for the anniversary of Queen Victoria's birth on this day in 1819, but I have a feeling Quinn is mortified. Not because her father has taken up cross-dressing, but because that dress is soooo two centuries ago!

Hopefully she'll be able to take her mind off things with a visit to Chez Pierre for National Escargot Day, but please don't tell her what that means. She's had a hard enough day as it is.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 25): "Carrie and Kira were now dressed in a spare set of their clothes and equipped with their Mac 10s, and were packing the rest of their stuff up."

  • Daria's Life's Lottery, by Charles RB (parts 5 and 6): "You've never had a friend before. You weren't sure you ever would. You even inherit your first real crush on Jane's brother, who's a lazy bum but boy is he hot." (Part 6)

  • In August Company, by ninjamouse1 (COMPLETE!): "'Now Angus, what do you see?' Mrs Manson, school counsellor of dubious credentials, no confidentiality agreement at all and terrible trouble with names in general, held up a picture of two silhouettes, one male and the other female, talking."

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 2): "Hattie and Daria walked into the writers' suite. The first thing that Daria noticed was the large conference table in the center of the room near the door."

  • The More Things Change, by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 7): "While Brittany and I were heading to an unoccupied table that just so happened to be coated in a wide variety of condiments, Jane was working her way into Queens to pick up her husband."

Monday, May 22, 2017

A Day for Andrea and...the Other One, I Guess


Daria's wishing Andrea a happy World Goth Day, although neither of them seems very enthusiastic about it. Come to think of it, maybe that's the point.

Today is also Buy a Musical Instrument Day, so this would be a good time for Daria to buy a new flute to replace the one Jake ran over. You know, just in case she feels like playing "Pop Goes the Weasel" again. Because that's a thing that would happen.

Fandom News!

Saturday, May 20, 2017

How Hard Could it Be?


Tom's inviting everyone to join him for Be a Millionaire Day, because of course it's just that easy. Then again, you know what? I'm going to check with my bank to see if they'll go along with this one for me.



Okay, I checked. They won't.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (parts 23 and 24): "Dave didn't have a radio, when exorcising the possessed, it was important to have as few loose items on ones self as possible, so just the safety scissors, or just the blowtorch, or just the CS intravenous syringe, whatever he was using (in this case he was carrying a scalpel and a CS spray)." (Part 24)

  • Daria's Life's Lottery, by Charles RB (parts 1 - 4): "You're already lucky in life's lottery: your parents are both educated middle-class white people in the United States of America, in the second half of the 20th century." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 1): "Tom opened one eye and was enjoying just lying there in the bed. The cool air in the room and faint smell of bleach in the hotel sheets filled his senses."

  • The More Things Change (Iron Chef: The New Canon), by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 6): "I didn't immediately regret walking into Nicoll's Bed and Breakfast, which I've taken as confirmation that I was, at the time, suffering from severe head trauma."

  • Suckered, by arandomshipper (Giveadogabone) (COMPLETE!): "The last bell rang. Daria didn't move from her desk, in no hurry to go anywhere. She just continued to read her novel. She expected no interruptions."

Thursday, May 18, 2017

Don't Forget to See The Salivary Gland Tumor!


Why not swing by the Museum of Medical Oddities for International Museum Day? Come for the skull crusher, stay for the Sliced Man. Ewwwww....

If that's not your idea of a good time, there's always the option of having a family reunion in honor of Visit Your Relatives Day. Uncle Max will be happy to explain why you're a no-good bum while Grandma Lane just wants to know what the hell is wrong with you. On second thought, I'd just go to the museum.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

Let Them Eat Kitchen Sink Stew!


Jake hasn't lost his head yet, but since I'm pretty sure he's portraying Marie Antoinette here I'm sure it's just a matter of time. The ill-fated monarch was married to Louis XVI on this day in 1770, and we all know how that turned out. Quinn knows, too, although she's more interested in wine glass shapes.

On this day in 1999, an article about Daria appeared in The New York Times. Yes, it starts out discussing Dawson's Creek but it gets to Daria eventually.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 22): "The witchfinder team met Gary as he was taking a break. 'Alright boss?' asked one of them."

  • Her First Mother's Day, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Daria. I didn't hear you come in.' 'Side-effect of not always wearing the old boots, anymore. I see you got Quinn's present.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 19): "Mack knew he should put his pants in the hamper. It was the adult, mature thing to do but he was feeling neither adult nor mature."

Sunday, May 14, 2017

Happy Mother's Day!


I think Helen is overcompensating for Mother's Day, and it really doesn't matter, anyway--even if the rest of her family was at home instead of on a date, schmoozing a client, and eating pizza with Jane, they'd probaby die of shock to see Helen home from work. She's still one-up on Jane's mother, though, since Helen is at least in the same country as her own children.

Fandom News!

Friday, May 12, 2017

It's Like Groundhog Day Only Weirder


Quinn is checking to see if the calendar has any other dates besides May 12, which seems to always be displayed no matter what episode. Among others, that's apparently the day Daria moved to Lawndale and the day of the infamous Kiss. It could be an anomaly in the space-time continuum that will destroy life as we know it...or it could be that the Morgendorffers can never be bothered to change their calendar. Could go either way.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 21): "The witch finders finally got their restraints off and picked up some nearby weapons, sneaking upstairs. It was daylight out, and there was nobody downstairs."

  • Daria/Wild Wild West Crossover: Night of the Short-Skirted Cynic (Iron Chef: Daria Team-Up), by Meester_Lee (part 1): "She wondered later how her life might have gone if she'd turned down Tom Sloane's invitation to go on a cross-country trip to Wisconsin with him and his friend Bart."

  • On The Road, by elainefr (part 41): "'Pregnant?' Max looked at Quinn's imposing figure standing before him with her arms crossed over her bosom and wearing an all-white Chanel Suit with soft gold adorning her ears, neck, and ankle."

  • Unnamed story (A bit of a story about a strange shipper), by 11tee (part 1): "'You what?' Jesse looked at his father with incredulous eyes. 'I have a date tonight.' Mo looked at his son as he worked the hand-cleaner over his fingers. 'Something wrong?'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 17 and 18): "A group of cadets watched as a helicopter landed at the secure heliport controlled by the USAES. The heliport was marked not with the standard 'H' symbol but instead with a double helix and the roman numeral XXIV." (Part 18)

Wednesday, May 10, 2017

It's the Helen Express!


Helen's on the right track (get it?) for National Train Day, which is the anniversary of the pounding of the golden spike in 1869. I'm sure plenty of Helen's courtroom opponents have felt exactly like they were facing an oncoming train, and I do not envy them one bit.

Today is also School Nurses Day, so today would be a good time to have the never-seen Nurse Chase have a look at that skin rash. Although, given that she seems to be a bit squeamish, you might be better off leaving her alone.

Fandom News!

Monday, May 8, 2017

Who Needs to Find Chechnya on a Map, Anyway?


Mr. DeMartino just got the bad news that there's no money in the budget for new supplies, so he'll have to stick with the ones made on this day in 1945, also known as V-E Day. I'm sure nothing important has happened since then, so he'll probably be fine. Frankly, most of his students won't learn anything regardless of how up-to-date the textbooks are, anyway.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic (Non-Daria), by psychotol (part 20): "It was hard to make any assumptions about the time of day that the witchfinders would abduct Carrie and Kira, night time would mean fewer people around to witness the event, but if just one person sees something happening at night it's more suspicious than if it is seen in daylight."

  • Daria (and other characters) on the Defiant Round Robin, by EntrancedCat (part 55): "Admiral Daria studied the ship which had slowly come up on them. 'Another boat which sort of looks like some fifties idea of a spaceship. Didn't I read somewhere that the Borg actually got it right in Star Trek? A cube, cylinder or sphere are the most logical shapes for an interstellar vessel.'"

  • Graduations, by dmsfanman (COMPLETE!): "As Tom walked out of the last presentation of his college career, he looked at his phone to check the time. Looking at the display he was a little surprised that he had not had a text or voicemail message from Daria while she was underway."

  • The More Things Change, by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 5): "There are a few things out there that I expected to happen to me at some point in my life. At least one of them involved drugs and a high-speed collision with a farm animal (don't ask)."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 16): "'He's headed this way,' Stacy said. 'Okay,' Quinn said. 'Stand back everyone. I'm going to hit him hard.'"

Saturday, May 6, 2017

It Would Be Hard NOT to Observe This One Without Getting Dehydrated


Daria's enjoying Beverage Day, and everyone else is encouraged to choose their own favorite to drink. Jake is trying to decide between a martini and some nice, calming milk while Ms. Li is demanding that everyone drink soda, soda, SODA!!!

Just make sure the drink you choose is not diet, because today is International No Diet Day. The Fashion Club can stop obsessing over their appearances and hardly not eating anything at lunch today. Yes, Tiffany, I'm looking at you.

Fandom News!

Thursday, May 4, 2017

How About "Narcoleptic Fireman" For a New Band Name?


Trent's all set for International Firefighters Day, but I don't think I'd trust him to save my house. If he didn't fall asleep holding the hose then the flames would inspire him to compose a new song about moths.

Today is also Star Wars Day for all you Star Wars fans out there. Judging by the not-insignificant number of Daria/Star Wars crossover fanfics out there I think it's safe to say there are quite a few in fandom!

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 19): "The 4 man witchfinder team picked the lock on the back garden gate, dressed in high visibility jackets, hardhats with the logo of a local power company, things that might be dismissed as while unusual, could be fairly legitimate in their presence."

  • Fork In The Road (Pasta's Never-ending Ideas Thread!), by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "No matter how much time passed, Lawndale never changed. Brittany Taylor kept a steady pace as she jogged down the block, the crisp morning air energizing her for the day ahead."

  • Graduations, by dmsfanman (part 2): "It was late on Wednesday morning when Daria stood in the kitchen of her university apartment and surveyed the scene. She rubbed her temples. This headache was really annoying her."

  • A Griffin Story: Pregnancy, by Meester_Lee (parts 7 and 8): "'I've been waiting for over fifty years,' said Alcie. Linda gulped. 'Is she going to be a witch?' she asked fearfully." (Part 8)

  • The More Things Change, by Two-Eyed Charlie (parts 3 and 4): "Saturday morning greeted me with all the pleasantness of a terrorist attack." (Part 4)

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 14 and 15): "'Antigua?' Sandi said. 'Where the hell is Antigua?' 'Island in the Carribean,' Charles said, as the other members of the Legion climbed into the Gridrunner behind him." (Part 15)

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

"They're so cute when they smile at you. Hello, precious!"


Andrew Landon is proud to remind everyone that today is Baby Day, and maybe if Michele gets the chance she'll remind him that he has two other children as well. Just to rub salt in the wound, today is also Brothers and Sisters Day. Given how most of the siblings on Daria get along, I don't know if many of them will be celebrating this one.

Today is also the day Jake's frozen waffles expired, so be extra careful if you indulge today. If you'd rather play it safe, you could have some Johnny Cakes instead in honor of the anniversary of "Stonewall" Jackson getting shot by his own men in 1863.

Fandom News!

Sunday, April 30, 2017

Be Honest: What Do You Think of Sandi's Hair?


Sandi's not really getting into the spirit of Hairstyle Appreciation Day, but when your stylist is a psychotic nightmare Quinn then I guess it's hard to be appreciative. I gotta say, though, that the short hair kind of suits her. Maybe it's just me.

I have a feeling Daria's going to enjoy National Honesty Day, but I don't think the same can be said about the people around her. Neither of these things are exactly new sensations, though.

Fanfic Update!
  • A Blast from The Past, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Miss Morgendorffer! Mister White! How wonderful it is to see the both of you!' Quinn froze in mid-bite of a crunchy ring as the familiar voice rang out behind her; at her side, a pair of mini-eggrolls dropped from Jaime White's suddenly-numb fingers."

  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 18): "Carrie watched the news as the report that the FBI were raiding all the locations held by Tigerswan for conspiring to sell US military tech to Iran."

  • Daria (and other characters) on the Defiant Round Robin, by Kuriamo22 (part 54): "Lt Commander Daniels sat quietly at his station on the bridge as he monitored the time stream for any anomalies or changes while sipping some coffee. Thing's had been relatively quiet for the last few weeks which suited him just fine."

  • A Griffin Story: Pregnancy, by Meester_Lee (part 6): "Linda Griffin's hope that bouts with morning sickness would be few and far between were soon blasted to shards. For the next several weeks, she started to have sickness bouts at least twice a day."

  • It Came from the Comment Section, by Blake C Stacey (BlakeStacey) (COMPLETE!): "JANE: What the Hell happened to you? DARIA: Mr. O'Neill. He found these people who redraw cartoon characters for what they consider 'realism.' I think I preferred it when the Fashion Club chased me down with cream rinses and Scrunchies."

  • On The Road, by elainefr (part 40): "Trent ran his hands over the smooth leather of the journal that she'd given him for Christmas. He traced the imagery of a spiral with his name under it, knowing that Jane must have helped in that aspect and smiled."

  • A.R.C CHAPTER 9 Babysitting, by ST91 (part 4): "Back home from school, Daria had no desire or mind to study so she sat on the sofa and watched an episode of her favorite show, Sick Sad World. It was a concentrate of trash TV, the ideal for relaxing and emptying the mind."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 10 - 13): "The Legionnaires, prior to their arrival in Washington, had had a long conversation about what to do for fun. The options for being under eighteen in Washington, DC were rather limited. Even more so for Legionnaires." (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13)

Friday, April 28, 2017

No Vogons, Please!


Andrea would like everyone's attention for National Great Poetry Reading Day. Even if you aren't in the mood for poems about rotting bags of flesh, remember it could always be worse: the poem could be Quinn's.

Today is also Kiss Your Mate Day, but Daria might want to keep her distance from Tom right now. Helen's probably racing over at this moment with some snacks. Brittany and Kevin, meanwhile, should probably try to come up for air pretty soon.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Marianne, the Only Woman More Overworked than Helen


Marianne is just trying to remind Helen that today is Administrative Professionals' Day and would it be all right if she picked up a card for herself on her lunch break? Helen really doesn't care, because as far as she's concerned Marianne is basically background noise anyway.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 17): "Jennifer Honey walked through the living room to get to the kitchen, turning the TV onto the news so she could hear some events that had occurred as she had her breakfast."

  • Daria (and other characters) on the Defiant Round Robin, by EntrancedCat (part 53): "Daria Victoria and Danielle Todds wordlessly agreed to keep Daria Judith between them as they walked to the turbolift."

  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 14): "Daria stood at the window to her apartment looking but not really seeing the traffic outside. So much had happened since she had left Lawndale..."

  • Graduations, by dmsfanman (part 1): "Tom Sloane checked his phone and the display showed him that he had only about 20 minutes to get to Daria's apartment. He was nearly running from the arrival platform to the 'T' – Boston's subway."

  • High School Never Ends, by Princess_Pasta (part 7): "Bloomingdale's was quiet for a Thursday afternoon which left the three of them to search in peace. Sandi was armed with her father's black card and a lot of patience."

  • On The Road, by elainefr (part 39): "'Hey sis,' Quinn greeted the smaller woman once the door was answered to the apartment that her sister now shared with Jane."

  • A.R.C CHAPTER 9 Babysitting, by ST91 (part 3): "Back at home Andrea found her mother sitting at the kitchen table buried under a mountain of paper."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 9): "A lone car pulled up at The Tower. Getting out of the car was a young woman with a pressed shirt, military slacks and wearing a beret emblazoned with some sort of arcane insignia."

Monday, April 24, 2017

I Think This Little Guy Needs More Than One Day to Recover!


Poor Roger (as fandom has named him) is not having a very good World Day for Laboratory Animals. Then again, you probably wouldn't like it if you'd had to spend any amount of time with Brian Taylor, either.

Today is also Fashion Revolution Day, and I hope someone has told the Fashion Club that the day is about making changes in the fashion industry and not bloody conquest of people who wear last season's styles.

Fandom News!

Sunday, April 23, 2017

Hooray!


The Paperpusher's Message Board is back up and running! Thank you to everyone who worked to fix the issues, especially Scissors MacGillicutty. If anyone is having issues with how the board displays, please try clearing your browser cache or going to the user control panel and switching the style from prosilver to subsilver2 and then back again.

Saturday, April 22, 2017

Tom Just Kant Stay Awake


Poor Tom is really trying to appreciate Immanuel Kant on the 293rd anniversary of the philosopher's birth, but I just don't think it's going to work out. If only Kant had livened up the book with a gunfight or a fur bikini, Tom might have been able to stay awake. But then we'd have had no wacky hijinks involving school rumors, so perhaps it's all for the best.

Today is also Girl Scout Leader Day, so let's all take a moment to appreciate the poor soul who had to take Jane Lane and a bunch of girls singing "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt" on a hike. Hey, I just thought of Mr. DeMartino's dream job!

Fanfic Update!
  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 12): "'Ah,' Daria winced at the sting of the alcohol that she was dabbing on her cuts. 'Damn Zon and their broken bottles and stupid me, for getting into a fight over a guy. This is so high school.'"

  • This is my stop, by Honey-On-Toast (parts 10 and 11): "The washing up was more of just a task of physical work, it was persuading Quinn to participate. There was nagging, exchange of sarcasm, bribery and finally it was done." (Part 11)

Thursday, April 20, 2017

Putting the "High" in High Five


President's Day (or Days?) are celebrating National High Five Day, which makes me wonder if the actual National High Five Day is feeling a little annoyed about having his or her day co-opted.

Today is also 4/20, and I have a sneaking suspicion that Trent might be celebrating this one. PSA: don't attempt to high-five while stoned. Just...don't.

Today is also Volunteer Recognition Day, so this would be a good time to volunteer to help hospitalized kids with art projects or read to senior citizens. Also, preferably not while stoned.

The PPMB is still unavailable, and Scissors MacGillicutty has an explanation and progress report.

Tuesday, April 18, 2017

The Amazing Juggling Jodie!


Jodie is celebrating International Jugglers Day, although I think she's more accustomed to the metaphorical kind of juggling--extracurriculars, volunteer work, etc. Gotta say, though: she's doing a good job there. Does "expert juggler" carry any weight on college applications?

The PPMB is still experiencing difficulties, but remember that you can watch for updates at the Paperpusher's Message Board Twitter Account.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 16): "The scene of the crash and the shootout was now cordoned off and being examined when Mike Freeman showed up, the superintendent was overseeing the CSIs as they photo'd and bagged items and uniform were interviewing witnesses including the occupants of the house that had been included in the crime scene because of the bullets that had embedded themselves in the roof."

  • Dear World, You Suck, by blockedthewriter (COMPLETE!): "Halfway into a pepperoni slice at Pizza King, Jane drops the confession like a trembling grenade."

  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 11): "Trent entered the room and saw her. She sat up in one of the emergency room beds with the other two curtains drawn on each side to give the other patients their privacy."

  • To Be A Big Brother, by arandomshipper (COMPLETE!): "They think I'm oblivious. Janey and Daria both. I probably am. Just not about that."

Sunday, April 16, 2017

The Little Imitator


Mr. O'Neill is about the last person I'd expect to portray Charlie Chaplin on the anniversary of his birth in 1889. For one thing, Chaplin was funny on purpose.

Also, happy Easter to everyone who celebrates it! Please enjoy this list of Easter treats courtesy of the Sh33p's Fluff website: Fandom News!

Friday, April 14, 2017

The View From Below


Daria doesn't quite have it right for Look up at the Sky Day, because right now she's looking up at the ceiling. It could be that she's waiting for the library roof to finish caving in, but if that's the case then I don't think it's wise to stay underneath it.

Today is also Ex Spouse Day, although I doubt Ms. Barch will want to celebrate. Unless the celebration involves ranting and raving, although for her that just means today's a day that ends in "Y."

Finally, this is the anniversary for the episodes "The Lab Brat" and "Of Human Bonding," which aired on this day in 1997 and 2000. Jake did a lot of bonding in both episodes--with Kevin in one and with Daria in the other. I sometimes wish there was more fanfic centered around Jake and Kevin hanging out. Hint, hint.

As if this post, the PPMB was not functioning, but hopefully it will return soon so everyone can enjoy this...

Fanfic Update!
  • High School Never Ends, by Princess_Pasta (part 6): "The smell of cinnamon was the first thing that greeted Stacy as soon she left her room. She padded her way into the kitchen, the prospect of food enough to shake off the cloud of sleep."

  • The More Things Change (Iron Chef: The New Canon), by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 2): "Glass Café sits in a part of Hell's Kitchen that never fails to make me wonder how I can manage my rent month in and month out."

  • A.R.C CHAPTER 9 Babysitting, by ST91 (part 2): "Thoughts. Daria had several of them in mind. The unplanned trip to the hospital and the modeling agency ordeal had distracted her but now the doubt had returned to haunt her."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 6 - 8): "Daria put down her English textbook. She had two hours of exercise scheduled for that afternoon, more close-order combat training. She realized the necessity but hated the time-suck." (Part 7) (Part 8)

Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Perhaps If He Heaves Another Big, Melodramatic Sigh?


Sorry, Wind, today is Big Wind Day, and you don't qualify. I would imagine the hurricane-that-almost-was might, though, and if we're counting big windbags then we could include Tommy Sherman, Terry Perry Barlow, Andrew Landon, Timothy O'Neill...and way more than I'm interested in counting right now.

Fandom News!

Monday, April 10, 2017

Add "Fore" to Jesse's Four-Letter-Word Vocabulary


Jesse's taking up an unusual hobby for Golfer's Day, but I suppose there's no canon evidence that Jesse doesn't like golf. Although I assume most golf clubs require shirts, which could be a dealbreaker for Jesse. Jake, our canon golf enthusiast, is probably playing a few holes today, unless his client caseload is too heavy for him to get away. Heh, I almost got through that with a straight face!

If golf isn't your style, then you could also celebrate Siblings Day by spending some quality time with any brothers or sisters you have. Daria has considered her options and would like to borrow a golf club, please.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria (and other characters) on the Defiant Round Robin, by EntrancedCat (part 52): "Daria Victoria opened Sisko's cabin's door and ushered Daria Judith and Danielle in without ceremony. 'I haven't had time to call in the decorators and make the place mine,' she explained needlessly as the two new arrivals took in the sparsely decorated room."

  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 9): "'We ne-' 'Don't say we need to talk,' was her quiet request. She sat beside him, not touching, on the sofa."

  • The More Things Change... (Iron Chef: The New Canon), by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 1): "I looked at the script, then I looked at the powdered-up, black haired bimbo of a man parked behind the 'host's desk' on the sound-stage."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 4 and 5): "John Dynell and Hiraoku Fukunaga completed their tour. Dynell was amused by the behavior of Fukunaga's employees. Having never seen their boss on the factory floor, they initially ran about like a bunch of headless chickens, trying to outdo one other in obsequiousness." (Part 5)

Saturday, April 8, 2017

Drawing Birds, Drawing Birdbrains...Same Difference


Jane's got the right idea for Draw a Bird Day, even if Claude and Romonica don't care for the honor. Daria, having far less artistic talent, will probably settle for flipping the bird instead.

Fandom News!

Thursday, April 6, 2017

Scots and Sports!


Joey's decked out in Scottish style for National Tartan Day, but if he thinks Quinn will be impressed by bagpipes I suspect he's going to be disappointed. Then again, Quinn might find herself drawn to the shrill, wailing notes.

Since today is also National Student-Athlete Day, Joey's football teammates can also join him on the field. I think Joey might want to change out of the kilt first, though. I foresee too many potential embarrassing mishaps otherwise.

Fanfic Update!
  • The Call, by dmsfanman (part 1): "Tom Sloane was sitting at his desk trying to keep his eyes open as he went over his group's final presentation for their class on strategic business planning."

  • Community of Creativity, by LadieTAG (parts 4 and 5): "There was a long silence before Max decided to speak. 'Trent, Trent are you okay man?' 'Are you sure it's her? I mean none of us have seen her since..'" (Part 5)

  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 15): "'So, Cassandra White, it says here you were discharged for disregard for the presence of civilians?' 'Yeah,' said the woman before the interviewer, 'they're all Islamic, fewer Muslims, smaller pool for terrorists to come from, am I right?'"

  • Daria (and other characters) on the Defiant Round Robin, by EntrancedCat (part 51): "Daria froze in the captain's chair as she heard a familiar voice from the turbolift... 'Damn, girl. You looking better than ever.'"

  • Good Things Come In Small Packages, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Lawrence! What in the name of God did you just do?'"

  • High School Never Ends, by Princess_Pasta (parts 3 - 5): "There was a beat up composition notebook buried at the bottom of Jane's messenger bag, next to discarded gum wrappers and broken pencils, which doubled as makeshift sketchbook. She eagerly pulled it from its confines." Part 4) (Part 5)

  • Statement of Intent, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "My final year. Cadet First Class Yaniv Ernet was proud of the image that gazed back from the mirror."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 1 - 3): "Jodie Landon woke up and took a good look around the laboratory. Her body felt exhausted and she began to run through her algorithm of reasons that could account for the fatigue." (Part 2) (Part 3)

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Everyone Should Have a Seeing-Eye Jane!


Daria's getting a little help for Walk Around Things Day, which is better than her solo attempt at Walking Into People Day. I'm sure her bruised fellow students appreciate the switch, too.

Today is also School Librarian Day, and while I don't believe we ever see any librarians at Lawndale High I couldn't resist the shout-out.

Fandom News!

Sunday, April 2, 2017

Words, Pictures...and PBJ!


Daria's helping her classmates celebrate International Children's Book Day, but I don't think that's the kind of book the holiday creators had in mind. If you'd like to read a children's book today, why not pair it with a sandwich for National Peanut Butter and Jelly Day? Daria will probably pass on that one, since her last experience with peanut butter sandwiches didn't go so well.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Art Burn," which aired on this day in 2001. Jane almost filmed a Waterworld post-apocalyptic video, almost lost her passion for painting, and almost uncovered a forger's plot. So many lost opportunities!

Fanfic Update!
  • The Date, by elainefr (part 6): "'How was the Country Club?' Jane asked of her best friend once they'd each settled into the comfortable positions in her room, doing what they loved to do."

  • From Both Sides, by mailorderannie (COMPLETE!): "Daria crossed her arms. 'So where did you hide it?' 'Huh?' Michael's eyes lost some focus."

  • I May Go Pop, by tafka (parts 1 - 3): "Daria looked at her schedule and sighed. Modern History tute again. She wouldn't have minded if the research assistant wasn't such a misogynist jerk who seemed to take great pleasure in baiting her into ridiculous arguments." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • The Lost Girl, by Hammyham (part 2): "The one good thing about being back at Lawndale; Jane is back too. Her room had been turned into a new studio for her Mom (the kiln set on fire in the basement), but luckily Trent had vacated his room a couple of years prior so she could have his."

  • A.R.C CHAPTER 9 Babysitting, by ST91 (part 1): "In Lawndale and its surroundings there are many restaurants and clubs. For some of them it's a miracle to still be open despite the health inspector, but others offer the highest level of services."

  • Shadows of a Timeless Song, by Dennis (part 14): "A thousand questions, many of them rude, boiled up in Daria's mind, but for once, she held them in. With a puzzled shrug, she walked through the door, which Ron closed and locked behind them."

Friday, March 31, 2017

Happy BIRTHday, Mr. WALKen!


Mr. DeMartino wants to wish Christopher Walken a happy birthday, particularly because the character is supposedly based on Walken. I don't think I've ever seen Christopher Walken reach those DeMartino-levels of rage, but then again he's never met Kevin Thompson.

Today is also the anniversary of the episodes "Malled" and "The F Word," which aired on this day in 1997 and 2000. Both featured teacher-accompanied mall shopping for Quinn, but otherwise there isn't a whole lot of common ground between them.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

This Holiday Really Belongs to Ruttheimer the Prestidigitator


Although it's Smoke and Mirrors Day, I don't think a seance in the girls' restroom is quite the intended method of observing the holiday. Then again, there's smoke and there's mirrors. I guess I can't fault the logic there.

If frozen bread and cellophane wrappers are more your speed, you can celebrate National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day with Earl and Barbara! Enjoy a two-dollar cookie and some echolalia--echolalia--while you're at it.

Finally, we wish a happy anniversary to Ted Dewitt-Clinton, who appeared for the first time on this day in 1998 in the episode "The New Kid." We didn't see much of him after that episode, but he still had an impact in fandom.

Fanfic Update!
  • The Date, by elainefr (part 5): "'What's say we go out for a celebratory pizza and you stay over. I passed my test with flying colors, thank you for your help.' Jane suggested to Daria while Daria exchanged books at her locker between classes."

  • From Both Sides, by mailorderannie (part 11): "The Justice of the Peace glared at the intruder. 'Young man, this is not an appropriate time to bring objections to this union! In granting a license, the state has affirmed that there is no legal bar to this marriage. If you had any other objection, you should have brought it up to the bride and groom well before this time.'"

  • High School Never Ends, by CaffeineAddict94 (part 2): "'There's no way that this is decaf'. 'Well, er, no. It's, um, half-caf'. 'Stacy, you know what caffeine does to my face'."

  • The Lost Girl, by Hammyham (COMPLETE!): "'Goddamnit Helen, where will my golf clubs go now Daria's home?' I put down my suitcase on the bed I vacated seven years ago and sighed."

  • Someone had to do it, by Rémi (part 8): "The family was sitting around the kitchen table, sharing a meal of microwaved lasagna while Quinn babbled about the nose job of some girl at school."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "She's thin, in an almost unhealthy way. Frail, perhaps. Quinn's mind speaks these thoughts to her, fingers feather light as they trace over the outline of a bruise on her bedmate's arm."