Wednesday, January 17, 2018

A Penny SAVED is a Penny--ARGGHHH!!!

Mr. DeMartino (or perhaps a distant ancestor) is trying his hand at science experiments instead of history lectures in honor of Benjamin Franklin's birth on this day in 1706. Either that, or he's trying to find a cheap source of electricity to save on his utilities bill. That man seriously needs a damn raise.

The deadline to nominate for the 2017 Daria Fanworks Awards is tomorrow! Choose your favorite Written and Visual works before it's too late!

Fanfic Update!
  • Creak, by Jim North (part 9): "After making sure all the lights were off and nothing was exploding or leaking gas, she grabbed her jacket, locked up the house, and settled into the musty interior of her car once again. She made the loop around the drive, giving the house one last visual inspection before pulling down to the street and getting underway."

  • God Save The Esteem: Punk is Dead, by Charles RB (part 8): "'We have gathered here not to mourn Jake Morgendorffer but to celebrate the life of—' 'No we're not, we're at a funeral!'"

  • Iron Chef: Truth or Dare, by Roentgen (part 2): "Quinn was terrified of the possibility of what could happen next. Which was worse, the Truth or the Dare? She kept thinking about it. 'The longer you wait,' Daria said with a smile, 'the worse it gets.'"

  • Priorities (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn is asleep in her bed while the curtains are drawn shut. Her alarm clock goes off. She opens one eye, then the other before reaching over and hitting the 'off' button. She slowly sits up and yawns." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Quinn's Skin (Quinn, Season 3), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn and Jim are having breakfast. Quinn is eating Model Crunch while Jim is having eggs and bacon. Quinn: How can you eat that junk and not gain wieght?" (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (part 19): "December barrels ahead in a blurry haze and January sits in waiting, fresh and new with the promise of revival. Daria still feels trapped by the cold embrace of winter."

  • Tales of Lawndale - Festivus Frustrations, by Eduard Tubin (part 1): "Daria had noticed Amisha spending more time in his demon form when at home. He flew down the stairs and into the kitchen past her father, landed ext to the coffee and Jake didn't notice."

  • A Three Hour Tour, by Jim North (part 3): "While his first mate was getting settled in with the passengers, Tony was busying himself with making sure everything was in tip-top shape before they headed out."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries : Thread #2), by Roentgen and Brother Grimace (parts 92 and 93): "'So when do I get to make my "debut"?' Karen asked. It was hard to get Jodie's attention. Karen looked down at what appeared to be a carburetor lying at her feet, along with several socket wrenches, with a paper of mathematical drawings pinned by one of the wrenches. 'Hey, Jodie?'" (Part 93)

Monday, January 15, 2018

God Save the Queen of Sarcasm!

Daria looks very uncomfortable on the anniversary of Queen Elizabeth I's coronation on this day in 1559. I'm sure Daria would give us all the royal wave (or maybe something less polite) if only she were able to move even the slightest bit.

I hope that crowns count as hats, because today is also National Hat Day. This is probably one of Helen's least favorite holidays, based on her belief that she looks terrible in hats, but if Eric tells her to wear a hat then by God she will wear a hat!

Time is running out for the 2017 Daria Fanworks Awards! If you have any favorite written and visual works, please nominate them today!

Fandom News!

Saturday, January 13, 2018

I'm Not So Sure About This One....

Daria questions the veracity of my claim that today is International Skeptics Day, but since she's fandom's favorite skeptic I should think she of all people would know this holiday for sure. Enjoy the day, but remember to double check any claims you hear, okay?

Today is also Make Your Dream Come True Day, and Daria's probably just going to drag her family back to Pizza Forest to make them suffer again. Better that one than the one where people walking down the street burst into flames, right?

You still have time to nominate your favorite written and visual works for the 2017 Daria Fanworks Awards! If you've already sent one set of nominations, you can still make additional ones!

Fanfic Update!
  • Camping 'Trip (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Jim has just accidentally eaten glitter berries and Quin is in a panic. Jim: Are you sure? I feel fine and I didn't see those berries on the chart I printed out." (Part 3)

  • Creak, by Jim North (parts 6 - 8): "As the shock receded, however, the reality of the situation began to settle in and images of imminent water damage started to dance through her head." (Part 7) (Part 8)

  • Drake And Jane Diaries, by James the Lesser (part 5): "Dear Diary Ms. Li is up to something. What, I'm not sure yet. She is holding a meeting on Superbowl Sunday that she doesn't want anyone knowing about."

  • Iron Chef: Truth or Dare, by Roentgen (part 1): "It was Christmas and everyone was just a little sauced. Not really drunk, but friendly enough for most of the social barriers to fall."

  • A Meeting of Consequence, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Robert Towns entered the small cafe which lay in the middle of the shopping area which lay between the two universities. It wasn't busy, so he went to the counter and ordered the unusual drink that he had to order."

  • Skeletons, by CaffeineAddict94 (part 2): "The last time he saw Daria was the funeral. The rain is what he always remembered the most."

  • Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (parts 17 and 18): "Dread welcomed Monique from sleep. It followed her through her morning rituals and even hung around while she tuned her Fender. It grew bigger and more persistent the longer she tried to ignore it until she was forced out of the apartment." (Part 18)

  • This is my stop, by Honey-On-Toast (part 12): "Jane's head bolted up, a reflex, as if she'd fallen asleep in the car or in class. All around her, everything seemed to be warped and morphed in a hallucinatory drug-induced trance state."

  • A Three Hour Tour, by Jim North (parts 1 and 2): "Anthony DeMartino sucked a large breath of salty air in through his nose, held it, and then expelled it from his mouth with a great deal of satisfaction." (Part 2)

  • Troperrific (Iron Chef: Very Tropic Fic), by nightbeast37 (part 1): "'So, how's your story going?' asked Jane. 'It's going great,' answered Daria, in her deadpan, snarky tone. 'It would've been finished by now, but Mr O'Neill suggested that I tone it down, make it lighter and softer as he says.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries : Thread #2), by Roentgen (parts 90 and 91): "Trent Lane felt that he was being brought to the Principal's Office. He recalled the string of events that brought him to where he was right now. On Saturday, he came to Daria's room and told her that he wanted to quit." (Part 91)

  • We Need To Talk (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn and Jim are seated at a table on a dinner date. Jim: Quinn, have I mentioned how beautiful you are this evening? Quinn smiles." (Part 2) (Part 3)

Thursday, January 11, 2018


It looks like Daria has been on the receiving end of Step in a Puddle and Splash Your Friends Day, but someone should tell Jane that the puddle should be full of water, not paint. This is not likely to end well, but fortunately Jane is a fast runner. Go, Jane, go!

Please remember to nominate your favorite works for the 2017 Daria Fanworks Awards. Click to find the rules and links to the nomination forms for Written and Visual works.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, January 9, 2018

Hey, Little QB Buddy!

Kevin's wishing a happy birthday to Bob Denver, who was born on this day in 1935. If there's one person in pop culture that could rival Kevin for incompetence, it would be Bob Denver's well-known character Gilligan. As far as I can tell, no one has written a Daria/Gilligan's Island crossover. All I want to know is, why not?! After all, today is also Play God Day, and what better way to play God than to manipulate the lives of your favorite fictional characters?

Don't forget to nominate for the 2017 Daria Fanworks Awards! Read the rules and nominate your favorite Written and Visual works.

Fanfic Update!
  • Blizzard, by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "So these here six strangers moseyed into the old town o' Tristram, armed and dangerous (and wet). ('This never happens in the game!' – 'WE KNOW!!')."

  • Camping 'Trip (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (part 1): "Jim and Quinn are seated at the table having dinner. Quinn: now that Dad's back and Erin is working there I have more free time on my hands. Jim: Glad to hear that it's all working out. I wish I wasn't so busy with my job lately."

  • Creak, by Jim North (part 5): "The dreamless void's hold was deep, but when Burnout next opened her eyes, the nighttime sky hanging outside her window suggested that it had also been brief."

  • Daria in: A Bad Night Can Always Get Worse, by TheBadWolfDoctor (COMPLETE!): " Oh, yeah, said Daria's brain, more than an hour too late for the information to be of any practical use to her, we moved to a different town, didn't we?"

  • Drake And Jane Diaries, by James the Lesser (part 4): "Dear Diary Jane is moving in. My mom won custody. My best friend, and girlfriend, will be living with me."

  • Erin's Flight (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Jake is reading a newspaper while Helen is reading some legal briefs. Jake puts down the paper. Jake: Helen, I forgot to tell you, but Erin is staying at Quinn's."

  • God Save The Esteem: Punk is Dead, by Charles RB (part 7): "Jake had made a few specific demands in his will for his funeral procession: 1) A cardboard coffin so that he could easily break out of it 'in case I've just been sleeping really heavily' 2) The corpse needed to have five dollars in its hand 'to pay Charon and have some change after' 3) While a normal hearse was requested, it had to be blaring "Die Die My Darling" out the window at full blast 'because it has the word Die in it'"

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 18): "The next morning, Helen started to make her arrangements for the trip. She began by reviewing her travel documents first. Everything was in order."

  • How cliche could you get?, by starwater09 (part 8): "I don't know how, I don't know why but someone is definitely screwing with my life. Daria thought to herself with a sigh as she watched Kevin drive away."

  • Model Student (Scream Scenes), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "Every part of Jane's brain was screaming at her to turn around, go back outside, and call the police, the fire department, the coast guard, any and everybody she could possibly get."

  • The Most Evil Daria of Them All... (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "There are many universes, there are many clusters of universes, some focus on specific periods of history, others are just dead husks, others still are dumping grounds for leftover waste from civilizations that use dead univereses as landfills, but a few find their focus on specific people."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries : Thread #2), by Roentgen and Brother Grimace (parts 86 - 89): "Danny, You can congratulate me because I stopped using the 'I' at the end! Yay! You get pouty when I use 'Dani' or 'Danni' and I got it right for once!" (Part 87) (Part 88) (Part 89)

  • Winning (Iron Chef: Very Tropic Fic), by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "SETTING: TRENT LANE and DARIA MORGENDORFFER lie curled up together on the bed in Daria Morgendorffer's room in Lawndale, Maryland/Texas/California. It has the same feel, but is neater and there are a few additions. Her computer is clearly new, there is a vanity against one wall, and her open closet is filled with fashionable clothes."

Sunday, January 7, 2018

The Fashion Club Really Rocks!

The Fashion Club is getting delusions of grandeur--or at least more so than usual--for Old Rock Day. Quick, someone call Sandi old and watch the fireworks!

Today is also International Programmers' Day, so I'm sure the Fashion Club will be extra excited to learn that they have to share the spotlight with a bunch of (ugh!) computer geeks!

Fandom News!

Friday, January 5, 2018

Where's One Stone When You Need It?

Jake and Helen are being especially weird for National Bird Day, but I suppose what two consenting adults do in their spare time is their own business. Meanwhile, Mavis, Venus, Elvis, Chloris, Clovis and Posh continue to miss their colleague, Travis. For the record, I don't mean the canary that got stuck in the mall's air filtration system. I mean the singing cowboy, who also happens to be a birdbrain. At least Travis the canary never sang off-key country music.

Fanfic Update!
  • Creak, by Jim North (parts 1 - 4): "The young woman stared intently at the flier, carefully reading each word as the cherry slowly burned down the length of her cigarette." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Damn it Daria. No one understands, by Ranma (part 1): "'Daria!, get up damn it!' came an angry but familiar voice from the bottom of the stairs."

  • Erin's Flight (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "We see Jake and Quinn at the desk in Jake's office. The healthier lifestyle he was forced to pursue after his last heart attack has slimmed him down to his old self and de-aged him somewhat. Quinn is bringing him up to date on the business now that he's ready to retake the reigns." (Part 2)

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 17): "It was one of those morning commutes. Helen Morgendorffer had driven in from the southwest and had been caught up in a traffic jam on Interstate-35."

  • Match Made (Pasta's Never-Ending Ideas Thread 2), by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "'I thought the whole point of getting breakfast was to relax'. Across the table sits her best friend, Jane, who is half-way through a bacon omelette and on her way to her third mimosa of the day."

  • Off Day, by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, mamacita, what's the haps?' Daria looked up from her desk to see the lanky form of her best friend leaning against the doorframe. 'Hey, Jane,' she said. 'Nothing.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries : Thread #2), by Roentgen (parts 82 - 85): "The Legionnaires - 'Blue Team' - opened the doors to the top of Legion Tower. They could see the lights of Lawndale far off in the distance and the only noise in the air was the faint drone of military helicopters." (Part 83) (Part 84) (Part 85)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "Life is hard and for suffering. Even for Tom Sloane, though he would be the first to admit that as straight white male with no health problems in one of the highest income brackets his life was somewhat easier than most."

Wednesday, January 3, 2018


Daria and Jane are all set for Festival of Sleep Day, and ask that you please celebrate quietly or, better yet, elsewhere. I don't know if this holiday has a patron saint, but if it does my money's on Trent.

Today is also Humiliation Day, and I could start pointing out places in Daria where characters were publicly humiliated, but then we'd be here all day. For now I'm going to go with Daria getting splattered with paint during the Homecoming parade and leave the comments open for everyone else to post their favorites.

Fandom News!

Monday, January 1, 2018

I Hope They Don't Want That Flag in a Hurry

Tiffany's showing some hidden skills as Betsy Ross, who was born on this day in 1752. If that's a new fashion she's working on, then I think Sandi might need to have a word with her about mixing primary colors during daylight hours.

Today is also New Year's Day and National Hangover Day, and I have no doubt that the two being on the same day is no coincidence. Have a happy (but quiet) new year!

Fanfic Update!
  • God Save The Esteem: Punk is Dead, by Charles RB (part 6): "Day brought with it Aunt Amy and Erin Chambers with tired eyes and tired faces. Amy and Helen embraced like they hadn't seen each other in an age, and Daria took an instinctive step back when Erin tried to do the same with her."

  • If Elected, I Will (Not) Serve, by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "Daria hadn't eaten all day, so she took a break from her computer to get some pizza. Which meant, of course, that she got the Secret Service agents to get some pizza for her."

  • I Now Pronounce You Upchuck and Stacy (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn and Stacy by some mirrors while a seamstress (the same one from I Don't) works on Stacy's wedding dress. The dress is similar to the one Erin wore in I Don't." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Karen and Quinn Do a Promo! , by Captain Marbles (COMPLETE!): "'Shouldn't that be "Quinn and Karen?" I've got seniority, you know!' 'Let's just do this thing while I'm still young!'"

  • The Raid on Scarlett the Dark Fairy (An Alternate 'Hiding In Plain Sight/LLH-Universe Fic), by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "This a tale of one of our favorite fairies, and how a particular New Year's Eve changed everything for her."

  • Skeletons (Pasta's Never-Ending Ideas Thread 2), by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "The world spiraled around him while he stood motionless, still, the only movement coming from the steady rise and fall of his chest. Bitter wind tore at his face like shards of glass and he cast his dark eyes up towards the sky, searching for an answer in the blanket of clouds."

  • Trent Boosted (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'I didn't take your brother for the mechanically talented.' 'Neither did I Daria, neither did I.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries : Thread #2), by Roentgen (part 81): "Quietly, Quinn Morgendorffer entered the elevator at Legion Tower, having just arrived back in Lawndale after her Christmas in New Mexico with Danielle Todds's parents."

  • Ylem On Cookies, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Hello, Bonnie. Love your place.' Ylem frowned. Bad enough to be interrupted now, here, by her... and I hate it when she calls me that."

Saturday, December 30, 2017

He's Grrrrrreat!

If you think Jesse is an odd choice to emulate professional golfer Tiger Woods on his 42nd birthday, then let me explain the flawless logic. Although Jesse doesn't seem like the active, sporty type, he does like Frosted Flakes, and the Frosted Flakes mascot is named...drumroll...Tony the Tiger!

See? It makes perfect sense.

Fandom News!

Thursday, December 28, 2017

"Deal me in."

Mack is inviting everyone to join him in a game of poker for Card Playing Day, and the Future Morgendorffers are just about to start a game of Hearts as well. Perhaps the rest of us should follow their example! Unless you would rather not share a heartwarming family moment, in which case fair enough.

I, meanwhile, will be celebrating National Chocolate Candy Day, and don't ask me how that's different from any other day. It just is, okay?

Fanfic Update!
  • Ashley The Seal, by Brother Grimace (parts 1 and 2): "Ever have that strange feeling where you're not sure if you're awake, dreaming or in a really good fantasy - and you don't even care? Welcome to where I am, right now." (Part 2)

  • God Save The Esteem: Punk is Dead, by Charles RB (part 5): "Daria left a night full of punks to enter a house full of punks. You may think there are only two but the smell of puke was akin to an entire squat of crust punks on its own."

  • The Grace Kelly of Our Day... (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "The dress was fitted and tight in places that Daria tried not to think about too much, her hair had been styled and tied back into an elaborate bun, the borrowed jewelry from the Prince's collection felt strange on her fingers, wrist, neck, and the less said about all of the makeup on her face and neck the better."

  • My What Big Teeth You Have, by Anonymous (COMPLETE!): "Daria woke up in the forest, naked and covered in mud. This was not okay."

  • Reflections, by Lady Evil (part 12): "Jane lay face down on the ground as the sound of musket fire filled the air. Play dead she thought. That's what they're paying you for. Just lay on the ground and do nothing. Gotta say, this is the easiest buck I ever made!"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 79 and 80): "James Brown tunes were playing overhead on the tannoy - Daria didn't know that the Godfather of Soul played so much Christmas music. She had to admit that she was enjoying a little bit of Christmas spirit." (Part 80)

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Boxing Brittany

I think Brittany's got the wrong idea for Boxing Day, unless this is how she always goes shopping. I suppose the boxing gloves would be an advantage in beating other people (the Fashion Club, for example) to the best deals at Cashman's.

Today is also the start of Kwanzaa, which the Guptys apparently celebrate for some reason per "Pinch Sitter" and Kinesha's First Kwanzaa.

Fandom News!

Sunday, December 24, 2017

'Twas the Night Before....

Christmas, I mean "X," is a little on edge because tomorrow is his big day and he's still got a lot of work to do to get ready. I don't know how he'll manage to juggle his Christmas responsibilities along with his hiphop-punk-electronica band, but if anyone can do it, he can.

Perhaps he should relax with one of those cottages made of gingerbread as well as some eggnog for National Eggnog Day. Just make sure the nog is in season, because the last thing we need is another wacky hallucination-based Daria episode.

Fanfic Update!
  • David M., by ST91 (part 6): "David was in agony. He was tired, sweaty, and every muscle in his body begged for mercy."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 24): "Daria awoke in fright on New Year's Day from a dream where a single day kept repeating itself over and over again. She put out her hand to touch her younger sister's shoulder to reassure herself that this was 1988, not 1987 all over again."

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 37b): "Despite Rod's assurances, Dylan was worried when he saw the two Attorney-General's investigators still showing their faces around school that day, or at least as much of their faces as their dark glasses didn't hide."

  • Freakin' Friends Forever, by Princess_Pasta (parts 3 - 5): "Jane to Daria I haven't heard from you in a few days but I know you're the model college student and you're probably sleeping in the library." (Part 4) (Part 5)

  • God Save The Esteem: Punk is Dead, by Charles RB (parts 3 and 4): "The memorial for Jake raged on at the Zon. The club was a trashed mess and covered with sweaty, half-drunk arseholes and the toilets had clogged up days ago, and as well as the normal day-to-day running it was hosting a memorial for Jake." (Part 4)

  • How cliche could you get?, by starwater09 (part 7): "'Hello Street that hasn't changed one bit.' Jane says with fake esteem. 'Hello Shop that never gets any business but is still open.'"

  • If Elected, I Will (Not) Serve, by JoeMerl (part 2): "Daria was quickly relocated from her isolated Montana cabin to an isolated Montana motel. This seemed redundant, but apparently the Secret Service agents were able to secure it better, being stationed in rooms on either side of her."

  • A Silver Penny, by Shiva (part 3): "Daria Morgendorffer stepped through the entrance of Cedars of Lawndale, her father having dropped her off and was currently looking for a parking space."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 77 and 78): "Charles Ruttheimer and Quinn Morgendorffer walked into the empty meeting room. Both still wore their Legion uniforms, because neither had bothered to change out of them when returning from outdoors." (Part 78)

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Meester_Lee (part 1): "Daria Morgendorffer sat uncomfortably in potions class. She wished that she'd kept her subjective age; she felt it undignified to have been de-aged four years and thrown in with eleven year-old."

Friday, December 22, 2017

But Will She Make a Dainty Garland for Her Head?

Quinn's warming up to sing her solo from Madama Butterfly in honor of Giacomo Puccini's birth on this day in 1858, and I hope it goes better than the last time she got onstage for a performance. Hide the turkey legs, everyone! Of course, since the performance (according to Mr. DeMartino) is taking place in the automotive department at Payday, she might need to be more concerned about tire irons.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Fa La LA La La!

I know, it's disturbing to see Daria happy, smiling, and singing with a significant other, but let's just consider it a Go Caroling Day miracle. I'm sure she'll be back to her grouchy, snarky self soon. In the meantime, perhaps we should find out if she does any requests. "Christmas at Ground Zero" is a personal favorite of mine!

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 23): "Her dad put a Menorah in the window a day later. Since it was in the middle of Christmas season, Daria didn't think anyone along Whirlwind Drive would pay much attention to what her Dad put in the window or much care. But the girl across the street did."

  • Daria Rewind: 2017 (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane were in front of a Skype cam in Jane's bedroom chatting with Tori Jericho. 'So Daria and Jane I heard that 2017 was a crazy year for you,' Tori said to them from her studio in New York."

  • Defiant Round Robin Spinoff - Other Characters Appear in Lawndale!, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Daria and Jane had fallen asleep watching Science Fiction B-Movies. Then Daria vanished, only to be replaced by another young female..."

  • Freakin' Friends Forever, by Princess_Pasta (parts 1 and 2): "Daria to Jane My transition into adulthood started at 7:00 AM and ended after my mom broke down in tears in the middle of the Raft parking lot. I would've taken photos but I still have a shred of dignity (not much but some)." (Part 2)

  • God Save The Esteem: Punk is Dead, by Charles RB (parts 1 and 2): "Across New England, as the news reached them all, every punk-owned business and record store raised a flag so they could lower it to half-mast." (Part 2)

  • How cliche could you get?, by starwater09 (part 6): "God I hope she gets here soon! Daria thinks to herself shivering as she waited outside in front of her car at the train station. 'Finally.' Daria says in relief as she sees her sister approaching her with three luggage bags."

  • Leverage (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "'Let it go, let it go And I'll rise like the break of dawn Let it go, let it go That perfect girl is gone!' Sang Daria to her six year-old son, who smiled with glee at his mother's performance."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 75 and 76): "'Oh the weather outside is fright-ful! But the fiii-iiire is so DEE-light-fullll!' Quinn practically danced, singing as entered the lobby of Legion Tower, barely carrying six shopping bags." (Part 76)

Monday, December 18, 2017

Jamie's Made a Pig of Himself

What better way to celebrate an oddly-specific holiday like National Roast Suckling Pig Day than with an oddly creepy alter ego like this? I think this is one of those pictures that, no matter how curious you might be, you really don't want to know the full story.

Today is also the anniversary of two 1998 essays by Michelle Klein-Häss, "A Question of Gratitude" and "Control Room UPDATE: A Direct Route Has Been Opened!!!." Nothing earth-shattering, but an interesting peek into what the fandom was like almost twenty years ago.

Fandom News!

Saturday, December 16, 2017

I Mean, I Like Chocolate Too, But Even I Have My Limits!

Mrs. Johanssen has clearly taken National Chocolate Covered Anything Day much too far and covered herself in chocolate. Not only is that going to be really hard to clean, but I'm not sure if she's able to breath. Still, maybe if she's coated in the stuff it'll keep her from eating it against her doctor's orders.

Today is also the anniversary of Jane Austen's birth in 1775, so I can pair two of my favorite things in one day! Of course, we know Daria's an Austen fan as well, based on her parody story during "Write Where It Hurts." I'd bet anything that snarky Elizabeth Bennet is her favorite character, too.

Fanfic Update!
  • Band of Mothers, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Tiffany, who had been staring at her smartphone for the past few minutes, looked up. 'Should I go next?' 'Please do,' Quinn said with a sigh."

  • Coffee, by Zetor (part 1): "Stacy took a generous pull from her mug, savoring the lighter accents in the bitter flavor as the coffee warmed her body. Grabbing a latte from the drive through at Starbucks in the morning was fine, but a fresh roast at an independent shop was something else entirely."

  • Daria and Jane's Family and Family and Family and Family Thanksgiving, by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "Daria put down her knife from the task of dicing the onions to Jane's exacting specifications. 'Arg,' she addressed the classical music announcer on the radio. 'Just play some music; I don't care about your allegedly fond memories of your grandmother's spaetzle.'"

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 22): "It was now mid-November. Quinn's seventh birthday was coming up soon, and Quinn was already deep into the planning process of how she wanted to celebrate it."

  • Daria the Rich Bitch (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Jane glanced at her best friend Daria as her head dipped down for a moment and heard a familiar snorting sound. 'I thought Pablo said his connection couldn't get the good stuff until tomorrow?'"

  • Night Witches, by Panzerfaust 150 (part 13): "President Reagan walked into the Situation Room for the morning military briefing. So far, NATO was holding, just, though there were a few bright spots, along with a few bad ones as well."

  • Rage of Aquarius, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Jake, Helen, Quinn and Jim are having Sunday dinner at the table. The food is clams in spicey tomato sauce served over linguine with a huge plate of antipasta as a side dish." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • A.R.C Chapter 10 Imprisoned, by ST91 (parts 4 and 5): "'Soo will you ...' started to say Andrea before Charles stopped her. 'Yes. Today. During lunch time. I'm thinking about where to take her this weekend.' 'Yeah! Way to go Charles!' said Jane." (Part 5)

  • Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (part 16): "The SUV sped down the highway, thankfully unimpeded by any traffic. Helen was, unusually, in the passenger's seat. Then again, nothing about this situation was usual."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 72 - 74): "Helen and Jake stepped into Quinn's room at Legion Tower. 'Oh my God!' Helen said. 'What? What?' Jake cried. 'This...this's horrible!' Helen said." (Part 73) (Part 74)

Thursday, December 14, 2017

The Next Cheerleading Practice is Going to Be Odd

Brittany knows that today is International Monkey Day, but she looks more like a gorilla than a monkey. Still, points for trying.

It's possible that she's just being assertive in getting Kevin to take her to Chez Pierre for National Bouillabaisse Day, but I don't think she'd fit through the doors in her current size. No, Brittany, that wasn't a crack about your weight or your boob size. Please put me down now.

If Chez Pierre is too expensive for Kevin at the moment, he could just take her to his old employer, It's a Nutty, Nutty, Nutty World, for a Roast Chestnuts Day snack. Assuming the place is still in business after losing its only two employees in one day, that is.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

Save the Internet!

I'm interrupting our usual Daria-related blog posts today for an important message.

In just two days, the Federal Communications Commission is going to vote on rolling back regulations that stop internet service providers from blocking or slowing sites in order to force customers to pay premium prices. Those regulations, known as "Net Neutrality," keep the internet open and allow everyone equal access to information online.

If you live in the United States and want to keep our internet fair and open, please call the FCC at 1-888-225-5322, your senators, and house representatives and ask them to support Net Neutrality.

Sunday, December 10, 2017

What About Library Rights?

This moment of "Awwww!" is brought to you by International Animal Rights Day, and those rights include the right to be adorable. Today is also Human Rights Day, so I guess that pretty much covers every living thing on Earth aside from the vegetation. Unless today is also Plant Rights Day and no one told me.

Just because I'm a librarian and can't resist the chance to geek out a little, today is also the anniversary of Melvil Dewey's birth in 1851. You know, the guy who invented the Dewey Decimal system? A really cool anniversary for fans of library classification systems? Shut up, it is too cool!

Fanfic Update!
  • Band of Mothers, by Kristen Bealer (part 2): "Quinn was using her phone to take multiple pictures of Acai flipping through one of Madison's copies of Junior Waif Magazine. "#futurefashionista!" she giggled, posting all of the pictures on Instagram."

  • Come Together, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "The slim, dusky Frenchwoman, who wore the uniform of the National Gendarmerie (a branch of the French Armed Forces) and the rank of Chef d'Escadron (the equivalent of a Major or a Lieutenant Commander in the U.S. Armed Forces), shook her head as she walked around to the back of her desk."

  • David M., by ST91 (parts 4 and 5): "After spending some time at the PC writing his stories about Melody Powers, David decided to go to bed. As he undressed, his gaze fell on the reflection in the mirror and as always he saw the damn strapping he hated so much." (Part 5)

  • Evening, by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "Jake surveyed the remaining of his cooking work and the relatively empty kitchen and sighed. 'I'm alright,' he said to his wife. Helen let go of his arm. Jake wobbled a little, but remained standing. 'Maybe we should go to bed,' he said, looking at his wife."

  • Lust for Life, by elainefr (COMPLETE!): "'You're almost there. Here, let me give you a hand.' He knelt and extended a hand to her climbing form. They'd made it to the top of the makeshift structure in The Strawberry that those that had dared to brave it boasted a breathtaking view of Lawndale."

  • Night of the Short Skirted Cynic, by Meester_Lee (part 4): "'You did?' asked Daria. 'When?' 'During the war, while I was in the Cavalry,' West replied. Daria looked at him and thought silently. Assuming this is 1875, that would be the Civil War, she thought."

  • Now, They're Legal, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Colonel Armalin?' Armalin turned from the opened glass case next to a bookshelf (where he kept his Team Banzai jacket with Blue Blaze Irregular patch) as a thirty-something woman with long, chestnut-hued hair stood at the entrance to his office. "

  • Thanksgiving With The Barksdales (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Jake and Helen are seated at the kitchen table. Quinn is there as she frequently stops by to cook dinner (and make sure Jake eats healthy). Quinn: I told him that he needs to offer healthy choices on the menu, not just the usual greasy stuff, because of the anti-fried food firestorm caused by that movie. He seemed to see the light of reason." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Brother Grimace and Roentgen (parts 68 - 71): "So, two days after Revelation Day, we're are all eating in the Camp Tolnai dining facility. (Sergeant Major Nemec said - and Mags agreed - that it would look better if we Legionnaires ate with the military types.)" (Part 69) (Part 70) (Part 71)

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "She could barely think over the pain, the great burning coming from her abdomen where she had been shot. She could barely hear the rush of air escaping from the compartment over the sound of her ears ringing and the blare of the low pressure alarm."

Friday, December 8, 2017

Boxing Gloves and Ugly Sweaters Do NOT Mix!

Stacy's ready to box someone's ears for Take it in the Ear Day, and she seems extra eager, so I'd suggest that Sandi make herself scarce. Just to be clear, I am choosing to assume that the holiday refers to getting punched in the ear because the other possibility is

It's also possible that Stacy is preparing to go after some major fashion criminals because today is National Ugly Christmas Sweater Day, and I'm sure the Fashion Club is not impressed.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

"I Think That I Shall Never See...."

Happy birthday to the late poet and library namesake Alfred Joyce Kilmer, who was born on this day in 1886. I'm not entirely sure why the writers went with Kilmer for the library name, although it's possible it has something to do with the lone tree growing on the library property. Any ideas out there?

Today is also the anniversary of Altamont, the free concert that ended in deadly violence. According to Jake, he not only attended the concert but somehow got a refund. I wouldn't mind seeing a fanfic based on Jake's experience at the concert, but perhaps some stories are better left to our imagination.

Fanfic Update!
  • Band of Mothers, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "Quinn pulled into the driveway and parked. She checked the social media apps on her phone one more time, then eyed the house in front of her warily and wondered if she could come up with a last-minute excuse to bail. God. I'm feeling pissed off and I haven't even laid eyes on Sandi yet. Next time we get together, I'm smuggling in booze."

  • Come Together, by Brother Grimace (parts 1 and 2): "No one saw the small, saucer-shaped craft simply flow into existence, as if it was heated wax that poured from nowhere into an invisible mold set perfectly atop the plateau and became a perfect form in an instant." (Part 2)

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 37a): "The girl in the row in front turned round to look at them. 'Didn't you make the video about the Kris Brocklethwaite story?' she said. 'What', said Dylan. 'Are you talking to us? I don't like the sound of that.'"

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (parts 15 and 16): "The fuss about HJ's scar now behind the Morgendorffer family and the remainder of the fall term at J. Frank Dobie Elementary School went by without incident. HJ and Daria applied themselves with connecting letters with sounds, symbols with numbers, and stringing letters together to form words and were soon reading and doing arithmetic at levels well beyond many of their school-mates." (Part 16)

  • How cliche could you get?, by starwater09 (part 5): "'Hey Daria how's your day been?' Alex asked as she approached her friend in a bit of a huff. To Daria Alex looked exhausted but that was to be expected since she did have two tests plus an essay due that very same day."

  • Prometheus/Lingchi, by LongSnakeMoan (part 3): "The shadows from the soft light of the skittered and shifted from the breeze through the window, beeps and the rumble of trucks a distant soundtrack. The precious picture lightly gripped in her left hand, Jane used the right to scratch the fuzz on her head, the bristles oddly reassuring."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 66 and 67): "Daria had prepared the way ahead of time for Tom's return to Camp Legion. He arrived in Puerto Rico and immediately went to work. She started him on the 'heavy lifting' duties and figured that for the first few days he could work alone under the direction of the SPC and the Corps of Engineers." (Part 67)

Monday, December 4, 2017

Don't Ask What She Put in the Cookies

Daria's baked some supposedly "heart-shaped" cookies for National Cookie Day, but I don't think I'm willing to eat anything given to me by someone smiling that creepily. Seriously, she just needs to not smile like that. Ever.

Speaking of not smiling, the Fashion Club will not be happy to learn that today is also Wear Brown Shoes Day, because no one tells them what shoes to wear. What if brown doesn't go with their outfit? What if the brown shoes have too much heel or not enough? What if they're (gasp) comfortable?!

Fandom News!

Saturday, December 2, 2017

Vive la France! Or At Least the Female Half.

Barch looks less than thrilled that today is the anniversary of Napoleon's coronation as emperor of France in 1804. It could be that she shares a common historical interpretation of the man as a tyrant and a despot, but I think the key word in this is "man." 'Nuff said.

Fanfic Update!
  • Fashionable Reunion (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn, Stacy and Sandi have just discovered that the check out girl is Tiffany. They're all visibly shocked. Quinn: Tiffany!?! What are you doing here? Tiffany: IIIII...wooorrrkkk...heeeerrrrrree."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 14): "Six year-old HJ Morgendorffer walked through the doors of J. Frank Dobie Elementary School with his cousin Daria in Ruskin, Texas. School had started, and Aunt Helen and Uncle Jake were counting on him to do well."

  • My Night At Quinn's (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see a six year old Quinn walking in her pajamas from her room to the master bedroom. Quinn: (Thought VO) I can't sleep. Maybe Mom and Dad can help. She opens the door to the master bedroom and gasps." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Night of the Short-Skirted Cynic, by Meester_Lee (part 3): "'I don't think it will convince you, but my phone does have a camera function,' said Daria. 'Let me take your picture.' She picked up her device and held it to her face. She then pressed a button on her device."

  • A.R.C Chapter 10 Imprisoned, by ST91 (parts 2 and 3): "Charles's mood did not improve the next morning. His mother, seeing him so sad, asked him what the problem was but the redhead boy just said, 'nothing important mom.' Only my dreams being shattered." (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 65): "'Listen. I'm not desperate. And the Legion is not desperate. But I think that in the long run, he'll be helped more by being with the Legion that he will by being on his own.'"

Thursday, November 30, 2017

A Modest Blog Post

Daria's getting to know the pint-sized versions of the Lawndale folks in honor of the 350th anniversary of Jonathan Swift's birth on this day in 1667. I think Swift's biting satire would have been very appealing to Daria, but I also think the way O'Neill is pointing directly up Daria's skirt is incredibly creepy.

On the subject of birthdays and satire, today is also the anniversary of Mark Twain's birthday in 1835. We know for a fact that Daria's a fan of Twain's, judging by the Mark Twain T-shirt she wears as a nightgown and her comment about Huckleberry Finn being an American classic. She seemed less enthusiastic about Huckleberry Hound, though.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

It's Not Easy Being a Fashionista!

The Fashion Club is observing Giving Tuesday, but they're dismayed to learn that they have to give the clothing they've collected away to (gasp!) other people. As far as those girls are concerned, "giving" only refers to other people giving things to them. I fear those orphans will never get the ankle boots they so desperately need.

Fanfic Update!
  • Fashionable Reunion (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "We see Quinn pushing a shopping cart through the aisle. The cart is loaded with an assortment of healthy foods. Quinn: (Thought VO) God, with all the junk food I found in the house it's no wonder Dad got fat and had another heart attack. I swear, if it weren't for me no one would eat healthy." (Part 2)

  • The New J (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Ext. Shot: A strip club, the name of which is being changed from "Pleasure Palace" to "Cafe Risque", afternoon We see a black Lincoln (Jake traded up from the Lexus) pull into the parking lot. We see Quinn exit the car and enter the strip club." (Part 3)

  • Night of the Short-Skirted Cynic, by Meester_Lee (parts 1 and 2): "She wondered later how her life might have gone if she'd turned down Tom Sloane's invitation to go on a cross-country trip to Wisconsin with him and his friend Bart." (Part 2)

  • Prometheus/Lingchi, by LongSnakeMoan (part 2): "The people who'd made this torture had been from a magazine, one of those magazines that released two issues a year for bands full of musicians you'd never heard of, wearing clothes that cost the earth from designers you'd never heard of, making movies you'd never see or want to see."

  • Reflections (formerly Second Chances), by Lady Evil (part 11): "Jane met up with the elderly lady she had seen holding the clipboard at the library. Today, she was dressed up like pictures Jane had seen of Betsy Ross or Martha Washington."

  • Something (Pasta's Never-Ending Ideas Thread 2), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "There were few things more comforting than the quiet seclusion of a bathroom stall. Daria Morgendorffer nervously fidgeted with the pen in her hand, desperately wishing she had more to say."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "'You could say that,' Archer said, twirling her finger in her blonde hair. 'It's the first thing I ever owned. A gift from the Lady.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 64): "Dr. Todd Lin, Dr. Jacqueline Musial and Dr. Robert Summers awaited the arrival of their very special guest. All of the doctors - a medical doctor, a psychologist and a biochemist - were members of The Elite, although none on the three had their gifts activated."

Sunday, November 26, 2017

Mmm...Cake and Peanuts!

Quinn's ready for National Cake Day, and I still want to know where she got that cake. I have serious doubts that she baked that thing herself, so did she con one (or more) of the three Js to do it for her? I'm picturing Three Stooges-style hijinks here and I'm a little angry that MTV did not air that (hypothetical) scene.

Today is also the 95th anniversary of the birth of Charles M. Schulz, the cartoonist who created the comic strip Peanuts. For a fun Daria/Peanuts crossover, see Petrel/CINCGREEN's fanfics "New Kids in Town" and "New Kids in Town II: 'Batting Practice'."

Fandom News!

Friday, November 24, 2017

"Darwin's the Monkey Guy, Right? I Like Monkeys!"

I have no idea if Joey, Jeffy, and Jamie have any nieces or nephews, but today is All Our Uncles are Monkeys Day so I guess they'll fit the bill.

They should really get over to Cashman's, because today is also Black Friday and Quinn needs someone to carry all of her shopping bags. Unless, of course, she's decided to observe Buy Nothing Day instead.

Okay, I'm done laughing now.

Fanfic Update!
  • An Annoying Paradise, by Resop (part 3): "Jane looks at Daria. 'Something is wrong.' 'Is my posture off?' Jane crosses her arms and then points down the hall of TFAS from their lockers. 'Don't you see?'"

  • Can You Keep A Secret? (My Annual Thanksgiving Fanfic Release - 2017!), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, lady – that's a cool costume.' Stacy Rowe smiled as the young Black girl – she recognized her as Rachel Landon, Jodie's little sister – passed by and complimented her."

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 11): "'How did it go?' asked Ted. 'Miserably,' Daria sat down at the table where the two were convening. 'Jane reacted... in the only way that made sense.'"

  • The Heart of the Matter (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn, Daria and Helen are at the table discussing Jake's care. Helen: I can handle most of the in-home care. I'll just have to cut back my hours at the firm. The real problem is what the two of you can do."

  • The New J (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (part 1): "We see Quinn seated at Jake's desk. She is wearing a dark blue business suit. On the desk is a small intercom. Quinn is going through financial statements. Quinn: (Thought VO) I didn't know Happy Herb was one of Dad's clients. It explains the cheesy commercials, though."

  • Prometheus/Lingchi, by LongSnakeMoan (part 1): "'Jane, I'm so sorry. I know I was supposed to back on Thursday but I've had a meeting and there may be more to this site than we thought so I may be in Dubai for another month. I know we were due to go out for dinner that I'll have to postpone again. Unless you want to eat here, I can book you a flight.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Brother Grimace (part 63): "'We were in Puerto Rico to cover the Canadian government's efforts to get citizens off the island before Maria hit. Not one of my idea assignments – I never cared for weather stories.'"

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Don't Take Tom up on Any Offers, Though. Just...Don't!

Since today is Go For a Ride Day, perhaps Daria would like to finally reveal just whose car she was getting out of at the end of "The Big House." No? Then I suppose the debate will just have to rage on in fandom for the rest of eternity, I guess.

In other news, this is the anniversary of the posting of the earliest Daria story currently available on paperpusher's "Her, Uh, Cane," posted on this day in 1998. There are just a few more fics up there now, though.

Fandom News!

Monday, November 20, 2017

Maybe It's Just a New Type of Cheer

Even if Brittany wasn't being portrayed in the style of a Picasso painting, she'd be more than absurd enough for Absurdity Day. I can't help noting that, even in cubist form, Brittany is still bursting out of the picture plane.

Fanfic Update!
  • David M., by ST91 (part 3): "'Please Karen, get out of the bathroom!' said a shrill voice. 'No! I'll stay here forever!' said Karen Jones."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 13): "It was a weekend conference in Houston. The oil industry bust had hit the regular Texas economy hard, and the savings and loans had been particularly hard-hit, with S&Ls going broke left and right."

  • The Heart of the Matter (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "Quinn is in the office in back seated at a desk. She is working on a chart. From her POV we see that she is scheduling shifts for the next week. Cut to the door and we see one of the boutique employees, Beth, stick her head in. Beth: Quinn, someone wants to talk to you." (Part 2)

  • The Move, by dmsfanman (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane watched as the movers left and closed the door behind them. Turning around Daria surveyed her tiny apartment, which was now filled with furniture and other stuff."

  • Runaway Daria : Where No Cynic Had Gone Before, by Waylander (part 3): "Daria was tying shoelaces when Hepzibah entered her cabin. 'Looking forward to see Bosconia, aren't you?'"

  • Sweet & Sour, by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "The brick wall beside Anthony 'Bloodshot' DeMartino held him up better than the adrenaline pumping through his body could. He wanted to keep moving. He wanted to live. He wanted to finish the job."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 62): "'One reason I feel that the Legion - and metas, and the prospect of alien life forms, in general - were accepted was because of the circumstances. The circumstances are very important."