Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Don't Take Tom up on Any Offers, Though. Just...Don't!


Since today is Go For a Ride Day, perhaps Daria would like to finally reveal just whose car she was getting out of at the end of "The Big House." No? Then I suppose the debate will just have to rage on in fandom for the rest of eternity, I guess.

In other news, this is the anniversary of the posting of the earliest Daria story currently available on Fanfiction.net: paperpusher's "Her, Uh, Cane," posted on this day in 1998. There are just a few more fics up there now, though.

Fandom News!

Monday, November 20, 2017

Maybe It's Just a New Type of Cheer


Even if Brittany wasn't being portrayed in the style of a Picasso painting, she'd be more than absurd enough for Absurdity Day. I can't help noting that, even in cubist form, Brittany is still bursting out of the picture plane.

Fanfic Update!
  • David M., by ST91 (part 3): "'Please Karen, get out of the bathroom!' said a shrill voice. 'No! I'll stay here forever!' said Karen Jones."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 13): "It was a weekend conference in Houston. The oil industry bust had hit the regular Texas economy hard, and the savings and loans had been particularly hard-hit, with S&Ls going broke left and right."

  • The Heart of the Matter (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "Quinn is in the office in back seated at a desk. She is working on a chart. From her POV we see that she is scheduling shifts for the next week. Cut to the door and we see one of the boutique employees, Beth, stick her head in. Beth: Quinn, someone wants to talk to you." (Part 2)

  • The Move, by dmsfanman (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane watched as the movers left and closed the door behind them. Turning around Daria surveyed her tiny apartment, which was now filled with furniture and other stuff."

  • Runaway Daria : Where No Cynic Had Gone Before, by Waylander (part 3): "Daria was tying shoelaces when Hepzibah entered her cabin. 'Looking forward to see Bosconia, aren't you?'"

  • Sweet & Sour, by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "The brick wall beside Anthony 'Bloodshot' DeMartino held him up better than the adrenaline pumping through his body could. He wanted to keep moving. He wanted to live. He wanted to finish the job."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 62): "'One reason I feel that the Legion - and metas, and the prospect of alien life forms, in general - were accepted was because of the circumstances. The circumstances are very important."

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Sorry, Daria, the DNA Test Says Otherwise


It's National Adoption Day, and it's pretty obvious from the expression on Daria's face that she's hoping at least one of them is adopted. Don't worry, Daria; in another ten years you can at least claim cousin status instead.

Today is also National Vichyssoise Day, so head on over to Chez Pierre and watch the phony French waiters try to pronounce it. Remember to send it back if it comes out cold!


The PPMB is down (again) as of this posting, but when it returns you can check out the latest...
Fandom News!

Thursday, November 16, 2017

That Can't Be Good For His Heart Condition, Either!


Mr. DeMartino needs to get with the program, because it's the Great American Smokeout and those cigarettes aren't cheap. Unless Payday has started giving them away as free samples, which honestly wouldn't surprise me.

Today is also National Fast Food Day, so Jake will probably stop off at the Beef 'N Cake for a tasty burger, provided their refrigeration issues have been worked out. Daria and Jane might opt for something safer, like pizza or cheese fries.

Fanfic Update!
  • Edicius, by elainefr (part 4): "'Hey.' 'Hey.' 'Come on in,' Jane moved to the side to allow Daria entry into the Lane home. She hadn't been doing much of anything and was debating within herself on whether or not she should try diving into a painting or going for a run or something."

  • The Heart of the Griffin, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Sandi Griffin woke up with a start. She was sitting up in her bed, drenched in a cold sweat."

  • Old Friends (Quinn, Season 2), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "A panoramic shot of Quinn's high school graduation. Zoom in to show Quinn at the podium with the award she's just received." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Scenes in a High School Hallway, by Roentgen (part 1): "Jane and Daria waited at their locker. 'So,' Daria said, 'did Tom catch up with you?' 'He thinks you're mad at him. He said he was going to talk to someone. I don't know who. I just wish I knew who.'"

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The World of Adventures), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "In the darkening sky's above the South Pacific Daria was beginning to re evaluate her career as a reporter for The Boston Barnicle. Her editor thought this trip would have been a nice working vacation for her."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The World of Adventures), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "The riverboat pulled up along the bank. 'Look Daria,' Jake said. 'The point is, the first day of a new school is bound to be difficult.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 61): "'People ask why I wasn't there. I'll tell you why. The President. I had expected to be deployed some way by USAES.'"

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Once Upon a Slumber Party....


Daria's gotten into the spirit of Young Readers Day, but I'm not sure if the other girls feel the same way. It could be Daria's melodious reading voice or it could be the subject matter, but either way this is clearly not the evening those kids had in mind.

Today is also World Diabetes Day, so be sure to keep Jane's warning in mind:

Mr. O'Neill - You know what they say, a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down.

Jane - Not if you're diabetic.

Fandom News!

Sunday, November 12, 2017

You Can Still Have an Extra Quart of Grease, Though!


Don't ask me how Daria and Tom can possibly look so sad when they've got pizza on National Pizza With Everything (Except Anchovies) Day. Maybe they just really, really like anchovies? And here Daria thought they didn't have enough in common. Shows how much she knows.

Today is also the anniversary of artist Auguste Rodin's birth in 1840. Rodin is probably best known for his sculpture The Thinker. He is slightly less well known as the sculptor of Steve Taylor's lawn jockey statue.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria of Asgard, by Meester_Lee (part 6): "Phil Coulson thought about his next move. His agents had already formed a cordon around the perimeter of the event, whatever it was, and SHIELD scientists and technicians were now beginning to their examination of the event site to see just what the Hell had happened."

  • Drive Safely (Daria and the Gang Thread II), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "After resolving the issue of having her best friend in a jail cell (with her sister shadowing her to boot), Daria was glad to get the fuck out of Dodge and drive back home."

  • The Heart of the Griffin, by WildDogJJ (parts 7 - 9): "Sandi Griffin was jumpy and on edge. After hearing the tapes of her mother and John Mangano having an affair and plotting her own murder she was livid. It was the ultimate betrayal." (Part 8) (Part 9)

  • The Move, by dmsfanman (part 4): "'Am I getting too old for this?' Daria asked. Tom responded, 'Too old for what?' 'Sugar Tarts for breakfast,' Daria replied in total deadpan while looking at the frosted toaster pastries sitting in front of her."

  • Tales of Lawndale: Daria and The Demon, by Eduard Tubin (part 1): "'What are you?' Jane Lane turned on her bedroom light and saw a small boy watching her television. 'What are you doing here?'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen and Brother Grimace (parts 58 - 60): "'I landed in Puerto Rico that morning on a private plane provided by Dawn Hall. Kyle Armalin had gotten in touch with Dawn Hall - how he did that, I'll never understand - and demanded that the Legion have a PR representative in Puerto Rico.'" (Part 59) (Part 60 by Brother Grimace)

Friday, November 10, 2017

W is for WTF?


Daria's freaking everyone out for Sesame Street's anniversary. The beloved (aside from Elmo, who can get lost for all I care) children's show premiered on this day in 1969, and for an excellent Daria-themed tribute see Mike Xeno's "D is for Daria." It's a little bizarre, like any good fanfic should be, but also surprisingly touching.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

A Good Day to Order Pizza!


Jake's Kitchen Sink Stew should cover both points for Cook Something Bold and Pungent Day, but whether or not anyone will be willing to eat it is up for debate. I think even easy-going mooch Trent might hesitate on this one.

Today is also the anniversary of Hermann Rorschach's birth in 1884. I think we should all celebrate by looking at pictures of a herd of beautiful wild ponies running free across the plains.

Fanfic Update!
  • David M., by ST91 (part 1): "When David arrived in the classroom he saw that all the seats were taken except one in the front row. While he was going to sit, David felt all the eyes on him."

  • The Heart of the Griffin, by WildDogJJ (parts 4 - 6): "John Mangano and his consiglieri, Dominic Valentino, were meeting at the office of their attorney, Eric Schrecter. They were going over the Ultra-Cola case and the possibility that it could lead to federal indictments." (Part 5) (Part 6)

  • Reflections, by Lady Evil (part 1): "Sunday morning, Jane walked by Trent's room to hear him talking on the phone. Once she got over her initial shock of finding her brother awake on a Sunday morning, she listened."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 57): "Mack returned to the barracks at Tolnai. There was nothing, nothing he looked forward to more than a nice hot shower, something that would wash the grime off of him, not just physically but mentally."

Monday, November 6, 2017

This Is "Nacho" Usual Holiday


It's Beavis and Butt-head's favorite holiday, National Nachos Day! Daria's probably telling them to celebrate someplace else, or she might be trying to explain to them that it's traditional to celebrate by obtaining and eating nachos. Either way, I'm guessing it's a lost cause.

Fandom News!

Saturday, November 4, 2017

Mmm, Ancient Egyptian Candy!


Jake's enjoying a nice cereal treat for King Tut Day, but I don't think we'll ever know for sure if King Tut was buried without his diver or his liver. I hope you can live with the suspense.

If that sugary cereal isn't sweet enough for you, this is also National Candy Day. Help yourself to some ZooZoo Drops, Juicy Joes, or--best of all--unauthorized chocolate. Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

Fanfic Update!
  • Fair is Fair and Hunted (Two of Hearts (one-shot)), by Princess_Pasta (snippets): "If the drive over wasn't excruciating enough, Lawndale High's own version of Medieval Times was the nail in the coffin. Damien observed the scene before him as one would animals at the zoo; the only thing missing was his camera."

  • The Heart of the Griffin, by WildDogJJ (parts 1 - 3): "Sandi Griffin was very upset. As she lay in her bed and stared at the ceiling fantasies of killing her mother swirled in her head. She'd been having a nice summer until Linda once again decided to piss on her parade." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • The Move, by dmsfanman (part 3): "Tom and Daria stood in the middle of an empty studio apartment. Daria commented, 'Good God what is that smell?'"

  • They knew why, by tjdolf (COMPLETE!): "When someone kills themselves, it really makes you think. The suicide note only said 'You know why', but that was enough."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Justify My Love), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Helen loomed behind Daria as her eldest squinted into the mirror and did the barest minimum she could do to qualify as 'primping up'. Quinn would have dropped dead in shock at seeing her sister put on any makeup at all."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The New Canon), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "'Jane, I'm so sorry. I know I was supposed to back on Thursday but I've had a meeting and there may be more to this site than we thought so I may be in Dubai for another month. I know we were due to go out for dinner that I'll have to postpone again. Unless you want to eat here, I can book you a flight.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 56): "I think the most depressed I ever was in Puerto Rico was when I realized how long we were going to be there."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "Tad and Tricia sat quietly for several moments after watching the Star Compass disappear over the falls. Tricia, embarrased from dropping it, said queitly, 'It's fine... it's fine... There is an old saying. Everything taken from the Abyss will eventually return there, be it an object or a life.'"

Thursday, November 2, 2017

I Think Quinn Pushed Her Sister Too Far This Time!


Daria's giving everyone fair warning for Plan Your Epitaph Day, but I'd hurry. She seems pretty eager with that shovel.

Besides, death is the theme of the day since it's also All Souls' Day, a day to remember the dead. Considering that's Quinn's name on the gravestone, I don't think that'll be a problem. The most popular girl at Lawndale High is unlikely to be forgotten any time soon, right?

Fandom News!

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Boo!


Today is not just Halloween but also Carve a Pumpkin Day, although it seems like maybe you should have done that at least a day or two before Halloween. Perhaps this is a holiday for procrastinators and lazy people? Trent, they're playing your song.

If you want to get into the Halloween spirit the Daria way, check out this list of Halloween-themed fanfics. The list hasn't been updated lately, so please feel free to share any recent favorites in the comments!

Fanfic Update!
  • How cliche could you get?, by starwater09 (part 4): "It was a warm, quiet and peaceful morning. The kind of morning where you just wanted to lay in bed all day without worrying about a care in the world. And since the morning was also a Saturday nothing was going to stop Daria from enjoying this wonderful peace."

  • The Move, by dmsfanman (part 2): "Tom and Daria walked through Penn Station pulling their bags behind them. It was like walking through a beehive there was so much activity."

  • Quinn, Episode 13: Farewell, Lawndale High, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn, Jake, Helen, Daria and Jane are eating dinner. The meal is salad and cold vegetable sticks. Jane: Thanks for letting me stay here while I'm in town. Helen: Jane, it's the least we could do." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • 2nd February (Iron Chef: Brittany & Daria Swap), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Daria Morgendorffer awoke. It seemed that it was the radio that woke her... with a song by Sonny and Cher. 'Something about this is familiar.'"

  • Ted Dance Party (The Ted Zone), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'...So, who can tell me where the Barbary Wars were fought?' DeMartino asked a class that was mostly half-asleep. 'Stacy!' Stacy's head jerked up, eyes wide. 'Uh...the Malibu Dream House?'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 55): "@jacairac Saw Quinn Morgendorffer fly by me. Not with an airplane! Levitating! Here in PR! #nlc1 #puertorico - Jacaira C. Maranda (believed to be first social media ever about Legionnaires openly using powers)"

Sunday, October 29, 2017

Jake's Feline Brave Today


Jake's in for a rough time for National Cat Day, because I don't think Mr. Whiskers is in the mood for his shenanigans. Really, is anyone ever in the mood for Jake's shenanigans?

In fact, for all we know, Mr. Whiskers is trying to celebrate Hermit Day and (like Daria) would far prefer to be left alone. Come to think of it, that's pretty much every cat, every day.

Fandom News!

Friday, October 27, 2017

She's Aliiiiiive!


Jane's going with a new look for Frankenstein Friday, and at least this one she can't blame on Daria. I guess she seems happy with it, so who am I to argue with her?

Kevin's probably thrilled to know that today is also American Beer Day, but I know a few beer snobs that won't be interested. Just remember, Kevin, don't crush the can on your forehead unless it's empty!

Fanfic Update!
  • Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 31): "Monique was stretched out on her old sofa, reading the book and drinking a cup of coffee. She wasn't sure why she was assigned an essay about The Movement."

  • Quinn, Episode 12: There Can Be Only One, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn and Kevin are having their latest tutoring session. The subject is the Vietnam War. Quinn: So, can you tell me some of the reasons we became involved in the war in Vietnam. Kevin: Um, It had something to do with that guy, the one who was President after World War II..." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 54): "'When I looked out the window as we were landing at Tolnai, in Puerto Rico, I didn't see any leaves on the trees. The grass was still green but the trees were bare. That was when my heart sank and I knew we were in for it.' -- Stacy Rowe"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Helen's voice rang through the cavernous Morgendorffer living room. 'Daria! Sandi's at the front door!'"

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Ewww, Greasy Punks


Kevin's looking...unusual...for Punk for a Day Day. I can't quite put my finger on it, but he definitely looks different. Maybe it's the new shoulder pads.

Today is also National Greasy Foods Day, so it's basically open season on junk food for Daria and Jane. Cheese fries, extra-greasy pizza, a burger squishing around your toes; go have whatever strikes your fancy!

Fandom News!

Monday, October 23, 2017

Now THAT'S Mental in the Morning!


Daria and Jane are wishing everyone an unnaturally cheerful good morning to everyone on TV Talk Show Host Day. Seriously, what's going on with Jane's grin? I think it's trying to eat my soul.

On this day 15 years ago, the Fashion Club made a cameo appearance in the online comic strip Mall Monkeys! I'm sure they were horrified to be included in something as (ugh) geeky as a web comic.

Fanfic Update!
  • Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 30): "KA-BOOM! Quinn wrinkled her nose at the memory of her sister practicing Earth magic in the backyard. Daria was shattering the rocks and making them explode."

  • Dammit Daria, by SexshiTiTePaNtZ (part 9): "A stained mattress, a lamp without a shade, a pair of tarnished silver candlesticks, chunks of candle wax melted down the sides of each stick and stuck to the surface of a beat-up dresser."

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 10): "'Hey guys,' Daria said as she met up with Karen and Ted at practice. 'Hey Daria,' Karen waved. Today, the women's self-defense class only seemed to consist of Daria, Karen, and Ted, thanks in part to that day being a rather rainy and dreary day."

  • The Morgendorffer's Shadow, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "There was a small conference room on the third floor of Legion Tower that everyone had taken to calling 'The Box'."

  • The Move, by dmsfanman (part 1): "It wasn't often that Daria had a headache, but now was one of those times. She was seriously thinking of taking something for it."

  • Quinn, Episode 10: Sisters Gone Wild, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Stacy, Quinn, Daria and Jane sunbathing on the beach. Stacy is wearing a blue strap bikini while Quinn is in a pink string bikini and Daria is in a leopard print string bikini. Jane is in a red strap bikini that has a push up top for the purpose of making certain...features appear bigger. The sight is one of Upchucks dreams come true." (Part 3)

  • Quinn, Episode 11: Acceptance, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Quinn, Stacy and Tiffany having lunch at their usual table. Sandi is still not on good terms with them. Stacy looks happy. Stacy: I got back my college acceptance letters today. I was accepted at both State U and Lawndale State. Quinn: Stacy, that's great." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 53): "'I don't understand this,' Helen said. 'I don't even know why you're telling me this. For God's sake, Daria – what are you doing?'"

Saturday, October 21, 2017

Blow, Mack Daddy, Blow!


Mack's giving it all he's got in honor of the 100th anniversary of Dizzy Gillespie's birth. Gillespie played a vital role in jazz music, although of all the Daria characters, Nathan is probably the most likely to appreciate it. Unfortunately.

Today is also the day that, fifty years ago, Jake and his hippie friends tried to Levitate the Pentagon. It didn't go so well, particularly for Jake's toes.

Finally, it was on this day twenty years ago that the first Daria VHS tape was released. It featured not only the first three episodes of the show but also the unaired pilot, "Sealed with a Kick."

Fandom News!

Thursday, October 19, 2017

Burn, Baby, Burn!


Check out the high-tech visuals on Daria's first (and only) computer game, "Daria's Inferno," which was released on this day in 2000. I still own it, but haven't played it in quite a few years. Those steam tunnels...they haunt me.

Today is also Evaluate Your Life Day, and in the immortal words of Jake: "Then you walk away. You change your name, move to another state, get some ID. It's not too late to start over, Daria, it's not too late! You're still a young man! You don't have to live with your mistakes! Get out while you can!"

Fanfic Update!
  • Edicius, by elainefr (part 3): "'I don't see what this has to do with helping me.' Trent looked down at her and couldn't help but to smile."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 12): "The big change came when both HJ and Daria were too young to understand what was going on. HJ had been living with Helen, Jake, and Daria for half a year now and had settled in."

  • Layabouts, by Anonymous (COMPLETE!): "'I'm bored.' Daria gazed up from her book at the tall, thin woman a few feet away from her. She looked like she was about to fall asleep while standing."

  • Quinn, Episode 8: Quinn's Addition, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see a very nervous Stacy holding the package that she recieved from Ms. Barch. It has been resealed."

  • Quinn, Episode 9: The Legend of Mad Dog Morgendorffer, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Mr. DeMartino standing in front of his class. Mr. DeMartino: Now, class, despite recent EVENTS leaving the school without an ADMINISTRATION we still have to teach. So I'm sorry to DISAPPOINT YOU if you were hoping summer would start THREE MONTHS EARLY." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Quinn, Episode 10: Sisters Gone Wild, by WildDogJJ (part 1): "We see Quinn, Stacy and Tiffany by Quinn's locker. Quinn has just gotten her stuff out as they are getting ready to go home. The three J's approach. Joey: Hey, Quinn, can I drive you somewhere? Jeffy: I'll give you a ride home. Jamie: I'll give all three of you a ride to the mall."

  • Second Chances, by Lady Evil (part 9): "Friday night found Jane laying in bed with Slash and talking on the phone with Jesse. 'His show should be on Z93 in a few minutes.' said Jane. 'You gonna listen?'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 52): "Daria woke up. She looked at the clock, and performed some arithmetic. She had slept for a total of eight hours. God, I thought I'd have slept for days after coming back from Mexico."

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Mmm...Oxidation!


Jake's not so thrilled about National Pasta Day, but who could blame him? Perhaps he'd be better off with a simple frozen lasagna. It's also possible that he's celebrating Wear Something Gaudy Day, although I would think the holiday refers to clothing rather than food. We'll have to let the Fashion Club make the call on that one!

Finally, happy birthday to Mike Judge, born on this day in 1962. Without Mike Judge, there would be no Beavis and Butt-Head, and without Beavis and Butt-Head there would be no Daria. So I guess it's like of like he's Daria's grandfather? Or maybe not.

Fandom News!

Sunday, October 15, 2017

Watch Your Step!


Daria forgot her white cane for White Cane Safety Day, but fortunately she has a seeing-eye Jane as a backup. Or she could try just wearing her damn glasses.

Today is also National Grouch Day, which also suits Daria pretty well. It could also apply to Mr. DeMartino, Michele Landon, Mad Dog Morgendorffer...and pretty much half the cast of Daria, when you really think about it.

Fanfic Update!
  • An Annoying Paradise, by Resop (part 2): "Daria and Nichijo breath heavily at the bus stop. 'Why did we run for three bus stops when we could have just took the first one?'"

  • Dammit Daria, by SexshiTiTePaNtZ (part 8): "'Thats the last one for this haul Max.' Nick shouted from the driver's seat of the Tank. The black van guzzled like a drunken tiger when Nick playfully floored the gas pedal, 'Come on Trent get in!'"

  • David M., by ST91 (part 1): "A blue Lexus crossed through the streets of Lawndale to the local high school. Driving was Jake Morgendorffer, father of David and John Morgendorffer, his two 16 and 15 year old sons."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 11): "The end of October already? Helen went through her day planner. She used paper; she suspected that she'd continue to use paper throughout her career. She worked for the Goblins and magic interfered with electronics."

  • How cliche could you get?, by starwater09 (part 3): "'I...have to go.' Was all she managed to say as she picked up her things and jetted out of the café before Kevin could say anything else."

  • Jodie's Interview (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'You know I didn't really mind that Senator DeWitt-Clinton liked my porno.' Jodie explained to the reporter, 'But what pisses me off is that he didn't pay for it. He just watched it on a free site. It takes a lot of hard work to make quality content for sale, and it really eats into my paycheck to have it stolen by online pirates. I've got bills too you know?'"

  • A Night In, by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "'Momma Quinn, Momma Quinn,' Lacey called insistently, her small hands shaking her mother awake from where she stood at the side of the bed."

  • Quinn, Episode 7: Intervention, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Jake at the stove working on another experimental dish. We see tentacles hang over the edge of the pot that he is stirring. At this moment, Quinn comes in. She sees what her father is doing and scrunches her nose in disgust." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Quinn, Episode 8: Quinn's Addition, by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "Ms. Barch is giving a lecture on mating habits in the animal kingdom. Ms. Barch: So, class, while most non-animal life forms reproduce asexually most of the animal kingdom engages in sexual reproduction." (Part 2)

  • Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (part 15): "Daria slowly padded her way over to the shower, turning it on full blast. She stood back and watched as the room slowly became shrouded in steam before she climbed in."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 51): "Without power and in the darkness of night, the helmet lights of the rescuers in their orange suits provided most of the illumination, save for one lone electric generator connected to a very powerful light poking its finger in the night sky."

Friday, October 13, 2017

Eep!


Jane and Daria are just a little bit nervous about Friday the 13th, but they should really know better than to give in to superstition. After all, today is also International Skeptics Day! Still, if I had to attend a school run by Ms. Li and interact with students like Kevin and Upchuck, I might feel a certain amount of dread about every weekday--so maybe their fear doesn't have anything to do with the date.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Party On and Get Out of the Closet!


Although today is It's My Party Day, I seriously doubt that Daria's willing to claim the party as her own. Any party of Daria's would clearly be a party of one, and even that might be too crowded for her taste.

Today is also National Coming Out Day, so if any Daria characters would like to confirm their place in fanon by revealing a previously-unknown sexuality, this would be the appropriate time. If you go by fanfic, that potentially includes every single character. Every. Single. One.

Fanfic Update!
  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 18): "Daria impatiently looked through the candy bars trying to find the one that just had to have."

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 9): "'Hey Daria,' Jane said on the phone. 'What's going on?' asked Daria. 'I'm not too shabby,' Jane replied. 'Things are getting pretty interesting between Eric and I.'"

  • Quinn, Episode 6: Sappy Holidays, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Mr. O'Neil in a crazy costume. In a lame attempt at political correctness he is wearing a stereotypical African robe (Kwanza), a fake white beard (Christmas) and a yamulka (Chaunakah). His attempt at multi-culturalism is a testament to his cluelessness." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 49 and 50): "Daria - "M" - wore her psionic regulator. She hated the thing, but she realized that she'd have to wear it if the Legion were going to make their incognito rescue mission a success." (Part 50)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "All, my board is thinking of firing me. All I'm asking is to let me take the Mel Gibson option - let me get into heavy therapy and counseling, whether it be in a facility or somewhere else. A good twelve-step program."

Monday, October 9, 2017

What Rhymes with "Fire"?


Trent's all set for Fire Prevention Day, although I think Jane would be fine with just following the family rule about not starting fire in rooms without fireplaces. Trent should probably stop by the Morgendorffer house, though, just in case Jake's trying to set a roll of paper towels on fire again. Unfortunately, I'm sure Trent will either get distracted by some song lyrics or fall asleep before he does anything useful.

Fandom News!

Saturday, October 7, 2017

Thrift Sales and Card Making? It's the Cheapest Holiday Ever!


It's time to head to the flea market for International Frugal Fun Day, although if Upchuck is there I think a lot of the fun is going to be absent. It could be a good opportunity to pick up a new Annette Funicello album, though!

Today is also World Card Making Day, and for once I think we've found a holiday that wasn't invented by greeting card companies. Stacy will still probably be giving her cards away for free, though.

Fanfic Update!
  • Burned Out, by Wrabbit75 (part 9): "Sitting on her bed as she looked down at the lyrics she had written in her notebook, Jennifer snorted in disgust. It's all just crap! She thought to herself as she paged through the assorted works."

  • Crime Scene (Iron Chef : Total Recall), by JPAGC (part 1): "Detective inspector Tommy Sherman had long ago concluded that all crime scenes are bad, and he had never encoutered a colleague who would not agree. But this really takes the cake."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (parts 9 and 10): "There was little to do until Petunia Dursley returned. Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall did regale them with stories about Lily and James Potter from their school days." (Part 10)

  • Quinn Episode 4: Beauty Quinn, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Stacy and Upchuck, who were just caught making out by Quinn, shake nervously while Quinn stares in total shock and disbelief. Quinn: OHMYGOD!!!! Upchuck...your...hand...on her ass....Stacy.....arms around him.....kissing...with tongue.....EWWWWW!"

  • Quinn Episode 5: When Fashionistas Attack, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Quinn at her desk studying for a test. Camera zooms in to reveal a somewhat frustrated look on her face. Quinn: (Thought VO) Leave it to Mr. DeMartino to schedule a test on Monday." (Part 2) (Part 3)

Thursday, October 5, 2017

Beats Dying in an Influenza Epidemic


Do you think Mr. DeMartino is happy that today is World Teacher's Day? Well, look at that face and then you tell me how he feels.

It might make him feel better to know that today is also Do Something Nice Day...except that sounds like the kind of holiday Mr. O'Neill would come up with.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, October 3, 2017

Mr. Green Jeans Better Watch Out


Brittany has extra bouncity-bounce today for the anniversary of Captain Kangaroo's premiere in 1955. It seems like a fitting match, considering a children's show is probably the most complicated thing Brittany's capable of following.

Fanfic Update!
  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 8): "It was still light outside. Once the woman stood up, Helen frowned. The woman had a horsey face and a long neck. Her hair didn't match, either."

  • Lawndale Wendigos (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'So Daria?' Jane asked while wiping the blood off her face, 'How do you feel with your new dark powers?' 'uh...' Daria breathed while giving a thousand-yard-stare at the pile of corpses in front of them, 'I feel pretty good... I feel like I'm... invincible rather than invisible, you know?'"

  • Quinn Episode 4: Beauty Quinn, by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "We see freshman Sam Griffin seated at one of the computers. He is alone and stares intently at the screen. We don't see what he is looking at but we hear... Male Voice: (coming from computer) Ugh...Ugh...you...like...that...Ugh...Ugh...dontcha...." (Part 2)

  • Stargate Delicately Balanced Daria, by Meester_Lee (part 3d): "Daria had no idea as to where she should go or what she should be expected to do after she left the Quesnir's sick bay. 'So what now?' she said. 'Now we wait,' said Lieutenant Poole."

Sunday, October 1, 2017

You Can't Get Old Without Birthdays!


Quinn is living one of her worst nightmares for International Day of Older Persons, but the good news is that she's got a geriatric Joey, Jeffy, and Jamie to carry her dentures and turn Wheel of Fortune on for her. I'd also kind of love seeing Quinn and Sandi as senior citizens in the nursing home, sniping back and forth and critiquing the other old folks' clothes.

Also, happy birthday to Sarah Drew, who voiced Stacy Rowe and was born on this day in 1980. Instead of cake, I'll offer some birthday cookies in honor of National Homemade Cookies Day. Don't worry; they aren't shaped like hearts.

Fandom News!

Friday, September 29, 2017

Regular or Decaf?


Daria's all set for National Coffee Day, as long as Quinn doesn't catch her and start lecturing her about dark circles. She might want to save her lecturing for Jake, anyway, because today is also World Heart Day and I think I saw him getting the cooking pot out a few minutes ago. That can only end badly.

Finally, G'mar Tov to anyone observing Yom Kippur tonight.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 30): "Matilda looked at reports of robbery of small stores. You want to fight a war, you have to get money from somewhere, they picked up grenades from those white supremacists, and some cash and ammo."

  • Drake And Jane Diaries, by James the Lesser (part 3): "Jane... Went to her mom. She ran, hitchhiked, and whatever else until she got to her mom. She's nuts. Maybe back in the seventies you could hitchhike without ending up chopped to pieces but today... I'm just happy she's safe."

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (parts 5 - 7): "There was a different receptionist at the front desk when she came in the following day. The receptionist did not take it well when Helen stated her business." (Part 6) (Part 7)

  • Life Cycle (Defect/Bug), by TalkingAnimals (COMPLETE!): "You feel...small. You wish you had a better emotional vocabulary; you actually wish you had a better grasp on your whole emotional register, period."

  • A Place On Earth (Pasta's Never-ending Ideas Thread!), by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "Daria Morgendorffer didn't wonder about the afterlife. By the time she was ten years old, she'd come to the conclusion that God didn't exist."

  • Quinn, Episode 2: New Horizons, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Quinn, Lindy, and Jane sitting on the floor. With the aid of Jane's trusty glue gun the three of them are making multi-colored mirror frames." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Quinn, Episode 3: Sibling Anxiety, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see a woman with graying red hair watching a baby play with letter blocks on the floor. The small child has on a green shirt and black overalls." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 48): "'This wouldn't be a very difficult alteration to do,' Danielle Todds said. 'And I could make it permanent.'"

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Why are you making me do this for you again?' Daria asked. 'Dah-r-i-AAAH? Who doesn't wish to be able to talk to animals?' Quinn said."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!) by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "'Now then,' Ms. Li explained, 'The two of you are all ready to be students here at Lawndale High. But there's one last thing.' 'Is this another test?' Quinn asked with a frown. 'Or is it more story time pictures?'"

Wednesday, September 27, 2017

In the Absence of a Can Opener, You've Got to Try Every Option


While today is Crush a Can Day and Daria is probably getting desperate, I really don't think that strategy is going to work. If only Kevin, master of crushing cans on his head, were here. And that's not a sentence you see very often, is it?

Fandom News!

Monday, September 25, 2017

A Good Day for Books!


Kevin is reading his favorite comic book for National Comic Book Day, and I'm just shocked that I was able to use "Kevin" and "reading" in the same sentence. On second thought, it's very possible that he's just looking at the pictures. However, anything that puts Kevin in close proximity to books of any kind is to be admired.

Also on the subject of books, Banned Books Week began yesterday and I encourage every one of you to follow Daria's lead in fighting censorship. You could even maybe do more than yell at the TV if you feel like it.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 29): "'Tonight we have the first of many alternate party leaders debates, we have Carrie, Spine And Soul, we have Jill Stein, Green, Gary Johnson, Libertarian, Evan McMullin, Better For America, and Darrel Castle, Constitution, now, let's start this with a brief intro statement by each candidate, what are your parties about? Jill?'"

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 8): "'Hi, you must be Quinn's new boyfriend!' Jake opened the door. 'I'm pleased to meet you finally, Mr. Morgendorffer!' Kenneth Malone smiled. 'I'm Kenneth.'"

  • The Fights You Can Win, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "I hate leg lifts. I really hate leg lifts... 'Oh, stop bitching in your head about how much you hate doing leg lifts, Daria!'"

  • Quinn, Episode 1: Burger World, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We first see Quinn walking on a sidewalk. Her pace quickens as the music picks up. Next, we see her in the halls of Lawndale High talking with the former Fashion Club. This is followed by her being praised by Mr. DeMartino while Sandi stares daggers at her." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (part 4): "'We can set up another meeting tomorrow, if that's convenient,' said Minerva. Helen thought about her schedule. 'I'd be willing to talk again tomorrow, but I'm not sure we can do much business. It's a weekend, and I suspect that this MACUSA takes the weekend off like everybody else.'"

  • Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (part 14): "A light dusting of snow had already begun to blanket the ground and Monique cast a wary glance at the sky, keeping her fingers crossed that she wouldn't get snowed in at the library. She wasn't sure why she was even bothering; she was probably the only one crazy enough to show up."

  • Star Trek: Voyager: What a Choice Leads To, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "Interplexing beacon detected. Initiating interface. Vessel Identified. Designation: USS Voyager. Alert!.Unit is not Seven of Nine Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix 01. Kes gave a small smile and began to search for the navigational data..."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 47): "To: Legion NLC1 Core Fm: Daria Morgendorffer Re: Results of voting; Upcoming Legion Meeting"

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Jane Would Prefer NOT to Celebrate Alison


Alison's here for Celebrate Bisexuality Day, but given her behavior toward Jane I'm not sure she's the best representative for this holiday. Unfortunately she's also (as far as canon tells us) the only representative available for this one. Oh, well. There's always fanon.

In lighter news, today is also Checkers Day. While the day doesn't actually refer to the game, I'd like to think Tom is sitting down with his uncle for yet another tedious afternoon at the Cove. Checkers is also known to canon as Kevin "King me!" Thompson's version of chess.

Fandom News!

Thursday, September 21, 2017

A Day for Grateful, Peaceful Hobbits


Helen is holding a brown lump of something vaguely hobbit-shaped in honor of J.R.R. Tolkien's book The Hobbit, which was published on this day in 1937. She should probably at least try to feign appreciation for the present, though because today is also World Gratitude Day. At the very least, I suggest she not start a war over it, because this is also International Day of Peace.

Fanfic Update!
  • An Annoying Paradise, by Resop (part 1): "'Are you even listening to me?' Startled, Asamura Daria (1) looks up from her book and looks at her sister, Asamura Quinn (2), through large glasses. 'Who are you again?'"

  • Neutral Ground, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked around at the slightly grubby, worn nature of the tiny mom-and-pop joint, which would have looked out of date in the 1970s, as David Allen (dressed smartly in his 'service dress blue' uniform - identical to the uniform worn by active-duty Naval officers, but with USAES insignia) followed her through the door." (Part 2)

  • Sonoma Coma, by jtranser (part 25): "'Begin the Gathering of Livestock' '...B-b-but that's insane, Daria!'"

  • Stargate Delicately Balanced Daria, by Meester_Lee (parts 3a - 3c): "The Quesnir came out of hyperspace at the edge of the star system above the plane of the system's plane of the ecleptic, then slowly made its way in-system, firing off probes towards two of the three large gas-giants that orbited what Earth astronomers would have classified as a G-class star well beyond the distance separating Jupiter from Earth's own sun." (Part 3b) (Part 3c)

Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Yarrrr! Have a Swashbucklin' Day!


Upchuck is being an extra-scurvy dog for International Talk Like A Pirate Day, because his personality alone just wasn't enough to drive everyone away. Instead, he had to add words like "wench" and "landlubber" to his vocabulary to make himself especially repulsive. In honor of the holiday, please enjoy Shane Greentree/Gregor Samsa's pirate-themed fanfics, "Esteemarrs!," "I Don't (Like Landlubbers)," and"The Plunderin' Of Don Jake."

Fandom News!

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Friends, Frenemies...Same Difference?


Helen just gave Linda a call to wish her a happy National Women's Friendship Day, and I'm sure she's already regretting it. Still, as far as I can tell, Linda is the closest thing Helen has to a friend. I mean, aside from her job.

Today is also Wife Appreciation Day, so after that stressful phone call I hope Jake is standing by with a soothing massage to help Helen relax. Or maybe a drink or two...or five. Depends on just how long the phone call lasts.

Fanfic Update!
  • Grab-ass and Gutter Talk, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Randy Novvak brushed back his sandy-blond hair, looked across the packed newsroom (and surprisingly so, considering the size of the area) of Global Gossip Today - and hoisted a smile to his face that would make dried milk curdle." (Part 2)

  • Second Chances, by Lady Evil (part 8): "Danny stormed away from the group to sit on a bench shaded by the cedars the hospital had been named for. How could he have been so stupid? How could he not have seen that a girl like Quinn would only talk to him if she wanted something?"

  • Shameless Self Insert Into Daria, by James the Lesser (part 2): "Daria is careful around Adrian when she hangs out with him and Jane. She knows she should tell him the truth about the gay rumor. The rumor disappeared quickly but his reaction is still etched in her mind."

  • Stargate Delicately Balanced Daria, by Meester_Lee (part 7): "'Hey, Daria,' said Jackie. 'I was wondering if you'd show up.' Daria wasn't sure what sort of crowd she'd been expecting before she sat down next to Jackie."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 45 and 46): "'Charles, no, I don't think this is covering old territory,' Daria said. 'I'm chafing under the limitations that we're being put under. I'm chafing over the limitations that I'm putting on myself. Yes, "this is an open would and I'm not letting it heal". But I think that the whole thing is leaving a sour taste in my mouth. I just can't let it go?'" (Part 46)

  • Where Did Quinn Go?, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "With a saucer with a pair of strawberry cheesecake muffins in hand, Raeleigh York escorted Quinn into the VIP conference room of the Continental Regency Denver." (Part 4)

Friday, September 15, 2017

It was QB Killed the Cheerleader!


Kevin, oddly enough, is taking on actress Fay Wray's most famous role on the one hundred and tenth anniversary of her birth. Either that or he forgot their anniversary again and Brittany is not taking it well.

This is also National Linguine Day, so pasta-loving Jake will be getting out the old cooking pot tonight. I bet equally pasta-loving Trent will be stopping by later to try some of his favorite meal, too. Just don't let it oxidize!

Finally, today is Free Money Day, and I'm sure Tom Sloane will be along soon to pass out some cash to everyone. Very soon. Any minute....

Fandom News!

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

But Is It Unauthorized Chocolate?


Daria and Tom are having a good time for International Chocolate Day, courtesy of Quinn--or rather, Quinn's admirers. I hope at least one of them is a chocolate-covered peanut for National Peanut Day.

Fanfic Update!
  • Shameless Self Insert Into Daria, by James the Lesser (part 1): "Jane Lane and her friend, Adrian Prescott, walk by a car as two girls get out. Jane takes a peek at the two through the crowd. 'Newbies?'"

  • Stargate Delicately Balanced Daria, by Meester_Lee (parts 4 - 6): "'So what do you think we ought to do about it?' asked Helen. 'I don't know,' said Daria. 'About the only thing I've decided is that I don't want to go public. I've seen what happens to people who say they believe in flying saucers and alien abductions. I've got enough problems without the ridicule. I don't want to spend the rest of my time here at Highland High being pigeonholed as a flying saucer nut case.'" (Part 5) (Part 6)

Monday, September 11, 2017

"Helen! What's the number for 911?"


Someone needs to tell Quinn that, although today is Emergency Number Day, it's not a good idea to call 911 for fashion emergencies. She's still ahead of Jake, though, because at least she didn't have to ask anyone for the number.

On a more serious note, today is also the anniversary of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks. Glenn Eichler had some thoughts on how Daria characters might have felt about it in his interview with Kara Wild.

Fandom News!

Saturday, September 9, 2017

An Un-bear-able Holiday


Daria's not too impressed by Teddy Bear Day, but perhaps she's concerned because that particular bear is full of honey instead of cuddly stuffing. Still, beats being surprised by a real bear, in my opinion.

Today also marks seven years since I temporarily took over posting on the Daria Fandom Blog II. No, really, it's a temporary gig, I swear. I can quit any time.

Fanfic Update!
  • Blizzard, by peetz5050 (part 2): "'You'd almost think they were waiting for us to come out of town, wouldn't you?' Daria asked as they battled a fresh batch of ravening revenants which had assaulted the barricades moments before."

  • Clarity, by Brother Grimace (part 1): "Elsie gave the barest shake of her head as she saw who was waiting for her... Oh, being in that cornfield has so lowered you."

  • A Night In, by Zetor (part 2): "Lacey was having a great night. Building and planning the circus had been tons of fun; she was good at putting things together and Lizzy was great at making up stories."

  • A totally normal morning (LLH - Short Entries), by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "It was a totally normal saturday morning. Kelly wasn't hungover, she only ever drank water and soda on parties, she had breakfast and the sun was shining. All in all, it was a very fine day."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 42 - 44): "Angier and Mack were finishing up the 18th hole. It was what Mack's grandmother used to call 'a blessed sunny day'. Even though he was a trained athlete, he was still getting used to the subtleties of golf." (Part 43) (Part 44)