Saturday, May 23, 2015

She's More Thick-Skinned Than I Thought!

Ms. Barch isn't very happy about World Turtle Day, although there's very little in life that she is happy about, so nothing new there. Still, this might explain why it took her husband more than twenty years to leave--it's not like turtles are known for their speed, after all.

Fandom News!

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Yeah, He Wishes He Was That Cool

Mr. O'Neill pities the fool that doesn't know today is Mr. T's 63rd birthday. Sadly, Mr. O'Neill seems completely unaware that he is the fool that is to be pitied. Fans of Mr. T may also enjoy Smijey/Smilefax's The Mr. T Trilogy, a Mr. T/Daria crossover.

Speaking of fools, today is also the anniversary of the first airing of "One J at a Time" in 2001. Quinn tried and failed at getting a steady boyfriend while Jake tried and succeeded at catching a squirrel. I'm not sure which of them was better for the experience.

Fanfic Update!
  • Badass, by LadieTAG (prologue): "A shadow of a man sitting in a chair comes across the room like a ghost. The only noise that can be heard is the sounds of Beethoven echoing hauntingly from an upstairs grand piano."

  • The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (part 160): "Tom walked back into his room and closed the door behind him, switching on the light. The clock on the wall read 11:55 pm. He had to be up at 6:55 the next morning. 'Okay, I can do this,' he told himself. 'All I need to do is live on four hours of sleep a night. Daria lived on zero hours of sleep a night, so how hard could this be?'"

  • Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 5a): "'This was a mistake.' Daria was exhausted. The sun still hadn't quite set yet, and the mid-Summer heat was at its peak."

  • A New Beginning, by LadieTAG (part 12): "Amy reached over and gently squeezed Quinn's shoulder. Amy was a little surprised to find out that Quinn had forgiven Daria and that they were working on becoming friends."

  • A New World, by breitasparrow (part 4): "Finally Daria's mind was taken off of all that when Tom spoke up first. 'Well... I think I know what I wanna do,' he said."

  • Really? I'm a Star!, by DIsaac (intro): "Daria Maxwell: I'm Daria Maxwell, I was a child star. Where? (Opening notes of Daria theme plays) DM: Yep, My self titled show, Daria."

  • Sonoma Coma, by jtranser (part 20): "Seated in a booth of GobyBurger, Daria and Jane watched an interview of pop culture media maven Carl Hotoke on the local public access channel while eating Cosmic Burgers with Psycho Sauce...."

  • You'll Know When You Have Kids of Your Own, by metameric1 (parts 4 and 5): "Rusty Michaelson pulled up to the little cottage, stepping off her rail just as the voltage dropped enough to be noticeable. Much better now; it had enough juice to make it over the crown of the hill, and she could pretty much coast all the way down the soft grade to the crappy neighborhood she called home." (Part 5)

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Who Turned Out the Lights?

Someone's recreating New England's Dark Day, which was a strange darkening of the sky that occurred on this day in 1780 in New England and parts of Canada.

It was probably caused by smoke from forest fires, but I wouldn't rule out a sleep-deprived Jake looking for paper towels.

Fandom News!

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Daria's Not the Only One With a Fur Bikini!

Jane is playing the Lady or the Tiger--or Cheetah--again because it's the anniversary of Maureen O'Sullivan's birth in 1911. O'Sullivan was best known for playing Jane in the Tarzan film series, and we know our Jane also has a wild streak. Still, I'm not sure she's quite ready for that pizza with entrails yet.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria: College Pains The Sophomore Year, by James the Lesser (part 8): "Stacy is getting ready for her race. It was the second to last race she'd run in the ASCRA Stock Series."

  • General Semantics, Private Angst, by gwrtheyrn (part 47): "The two Lane siblings looked down at Mr D, sleeping on the living room couch in their tiny Boston apartment, the same couch which Trent himself usually used for that purpose. Trent would have to snooze on their salvaged but mostly operational La-Z-Boy, instead. He'd already slept in it a few times, in the three weeks since they'd found it. It hadn't injured him yet, at least."

  • Lawndale's Finest 3: The Brave and the Bold, by NightGoblyn (part 2): "Scarlett looked over at the kitchen door and saw her best friend, Jennifer, standing there staring at her. It was quite possibly the first time Scarlett had ever seen the other girl's eyes completely open, and Jennifer was giving her the same shocked look her aunt was."

  • A New Beginning, by LadieTAG (part 11): "Daria arrived home after celebrating with Quinn and the rest of the group. Her parents were sitting at the dinner table grading papers while Monique was cooking dinner. Turning around, Monique could tell something was bothering her little sister. Daria sat down beside her mom and sighed."

  • The Phantom of the Library, by neonhomer (part 7): "Angela paced about the room. 'This is all I need. No money, no life, and now to bring this bad memory back up.' She stopped in front of the bookcase, and pulled the 1999-2000 LHS yearbook from the shelf. 'If I would have just destroyed this book, I wouldn't be in this situation.'"

  • Redux, by Princess_Pasta (part 19): "'Alternapalooza.' Shaggy said with quiet reverence, 'It just gets better every year.'"

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Daria (V/O): My world is fire and blood. A long, winding highway in baking sun - men in painted-on Lions colours taking steel footballs - flares in the sky as a convoy advances on an isolated rig"

  • You'll Know When You Have Kids of Your Own, by metameric1 (part 3): "Some of the other kids stayed around to watch, curious as to why Rusty was hanging out with this brainiac chick. Ignoring them, she unfolded the curious machine, which seemed to be made of sections of an old snow ski, hinges and mismatched bolts."

Friday, May 15, 2015

Hard to Tell if Daria's Enjoying the Moment or Not

Jake, Helen, and Daria are sharing a warm family moment for International Day of Families. Quinn is, of course, leaving them to it because she can take a hint. Also, something tells me this isn't one of Jane's favorite holidays.

The Paperpusher Message Board seems to be having some technical difficulties as of this post, but hopefully it will be back up and running soon.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Does This Pot of Gold Make Me Look Faaaat?

Tiffany's doing a lively jig for Leprechaun Day, and that might be the fastest anyone has ever seen that girl move. Still, St. Patrick's Day would like to know if she also has the customary congenital green beer breath.

Fanfic Update!
  • A Break, by digitalpanic (COMPLETE!): "Jane wasn't allowed to like Daria. Well, okay, that's a lie. Let's put it like this: Jane wasn't allowed to like Daria that way."

  • A Few Years Difference, by vlora (part 17): "The pair decided it would be best to find somewhere to talk, not strewn across the front seat of a car. They found a parking spot that wasn't illegal, or as legal as they could get it. Trent walked with the candor of inebriation, while Daria shuffled along in her familiar boots. At least that helped her feel grounded. Heels made her feet feel so vulnerable, and the heels caught in strange ways."

  • Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 4d): "Jane parked Trent's car and climbed out, taking a moment to look around. It wasn't the best neighborhood in Lawndale. Not bad by any means, but not as nice as Daria's. It certainly wasn't where she expected a fashion princess to live."

  • Lawndale's Finest 3: The Brave and the Bold, by NightGoblyn (part 1): "Jennifer put the car in gear and pulled out of Scarlett's driveway, smoothly merging with the nearly nonexistent morning traffic. 'You really need to work on this late thing.' 'I know,' Scarlett said between bites of sandwich. 'It just seems like no matter how fast I move, I always end up behind.'"

  • You'll Know When You Have Kids of Your Own, by metameric1 (part 2): "Oh, crap. Dating? For crying out loud, when did she turn fifteen? And why do I recall those ridiculous rants of Janet Barch so clearly now? (Not with my daughter, you MAN.)"

Monday, May 11, 2015

Her Arm Muscles Probably Feel Just Like Those Clocks

Jane's forging--I mean, reproducing--a work by Salvador Dali, who was born on this day in 1904. Or rather, she would be working on it if her arm didn't hurt so much. Hang in there, Jane. Just a few more copies and that Girl Scout cookie debt will finally be paid.

Fandom News!

Saturday, May 9, 2015

All Aboard!

Helen's chugging along on this lovely National Train Day, and heaven help anyone who gets in her way. I know we have at least one train aficionado in fandom, so this one's for you!

This is also Lost Sock Memorial Day, so if you find yourself coming out of a make-out/laundry room, then check to see if you have a bonus sock on your shirt.

Fanfic Update!
  • Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 22): "Jane skimmed through the pages of Axel's new catalog, smiling proudly when she noticed the tattoos based on her sketches."

  • Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 4c): "Quinn grinned and pointed a finger at Stacy. 'You said "Liz isn't who I'm into", not "I'm not into Liz". That means you have someone you do like.' Stacy froze. Had she said that? Why would she say that?"

  • Life After Daria (Iron chef: The actress who plays Daria), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "When we heard we were doing a interview with Daria Maxwell, The star of Daria, we prepared to interview somebody bitter and angry about being typecast."

  • Video Assignment Chaos, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Brittany Taylor and her friend Andrea Hecuba arrived at one of Lawndale's many small cinemas. 'Ah, we're just in time, Brit,' Andrea said. 'Good,' Brittany said. They were seeing a Russian art film from the 1930's."

Thursday, May 7, 2015

Don't Cry For Me, Llllllawndale!

Happy birthday to the late Eva Peron, who was born on this day in 1919. Although she was a controversial figure, I doubt she was anywhere near as unpopular as Ms. Li. For example, I'm pretty certain she never urged anyone to "give the gift of urine." Or if she did, it definitely didn't make it into the musical.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Atomic Communist Teachers from Marx

Mr. O'Neill is doing his solo performance, "Nothing to Lose But His Chains," again because today is the anniversary of Karl Marx's birth in 1818. It's actually hinted at more than once in canon that Mr. O'Neill is a communist, although nothing ever really came of it. I'm actually a little more concerned about why the man owns his own fake beard.

Today is also National Teacher Day, so let's celebrate our favorite Daria teachers! Hmm. If only a few of them were competent at their jobs.

Fanfic Update!
  • Ah, Hell, by metameric1 (part 31): "'Trent opened the door, smiling at the boy holding the jar of coffee beans still warm from the roaster. 'Morning, Russ. Thanks for the delivery service.'"

  • Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 4b): "Daria looked at the clock and sighed. Three seventeen. Time seemed pass slower as the end of her day grew closer, even more so than in school. Another thing to look forward to in adult life. It was made worse by the complete lack of customers. If someone were here, she'd at least have some amusing idiots to tell Jane about later."

  • Unnamed story (Iron chef: The actress who plays Daria), by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "'Why don't we just call it, Daria Does Dallas?' the exasperated actress asked. The executive said, 'Because some fanfic writer copyrighted the title back in '04 and won't give it up.'"

  • Unnamed story (Iron chef: The actress who plays Daria), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Uh, this isn't the kind of part I would expect you to do? I mean, I remember watching you on TV when I was a kid growing up and....'"

Sunday, May 3, 2015

Daria Would Rather be Feared than Loved, Even if She Could Have Both

Happy birthday to Niccolo Machiavelli, who was born on this day in 1469. Daria's reading his book "The Prince," but I don't think she's ambitious enough to actually take over any countries. Ms. Li, on the other hand? Well, remember what Mr. O'Neill said: "What is it about tyrants that makes them so...I don't know, charismatic? Our own Ms. Li...."

Fandom News!

Friday, May 1, 2015

Who Wants to Hear a Cannibalistic Rendition of Hansel and Gretel?

Daria's going to tell us a few stories for Mother Goose Day, but let's hope she left "Parables of the Way" at home. We don't want any more old people unplugging their respirators.

It's also Loyalty Day, but I'm not sure Daria qualifies to celebrate that one. What with the backstabbing and boyfriend kissing and all. "Betrayal, yeah, a stab in the back. Betrayal, yeah, I'm stretched on the rack...."

Fanfic Update!
  • Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 21): "After the meagre breakfast followed by the obligatory cup of coffee, Amy wondered if she should wake Daria up or let her sleep in peace."

  • Freakin' Friends of Daria, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Дарья, от­пи­ла со­довой и за­дум­чи­во про­из­несла: - Мне прис­нился кош­мар . Джейн воп­ро­ситель­но при­под­ня­ла бровь: - И­ии ? … Жду про­дол­же­ния !"

  • Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 4): "Quinn turned to Daria as they pulled away from the house. 'Thanks again for giving Stacy and I a ride school, Daria.' Daria kept her eyes on the road. 'I'm giving Jane a ride because she has to bring some stuff to school. You two are just lucky you're going to the same place.'"

  • Quinn's Code 13: A Night at Kristen's, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "Quinn Morgendorffer. Cindy Brolsma and Stacy Rowe arrived outside their friend, Kristen Leung-Bell's, house. They were going to have a sleep over. It had been organised the previous afternoon after they had all decided that it would be a good opportunity to get to know each other better, particularly Stacy."

  • Unnamed story (Iron chef: The actress who plays Daria), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Whoa.' 'Tell me about it,' The Director said, eyes still wide and glazed over by the raw emotion of the young actress' performance on her audition tape."

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

He's a Maniac, Maniac on the Floor!

Jake's cutting a rug for International Dance Day, although I think Helen and Quinn really wish he wouldn't. I mean, never mind the effect the vigorous activity might have on his still-recovering heart. What if the neighbors saw him dancing like that?

Fandom News!

Monday, April 27, 2015

Once Upon a Time....

It's National Tell a Story Day and young Daria's making a big impression on her sleepover friends. Of course, if slumber parties aren't your thing, then you can always read to seniors at the retirement home or put a modern spin on an old fairy tale to impress the Gupty kids.

Fanfic Update!
  • ВСЁ СТРАНЬШЕ И СТРАНЬШЕ, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Позвонила Квин. Оказалось, что она в Бостоне. Как то необычно тихо и смущённо попросила о встрече. Лучше вместе с Джейн."

  • Daria: College Pains The Sophomore Year, by James the Lesser (part 7): "Daria wakes up when she feels Conner moving next to her. 'Hey.' She reaches over and grabs her glasses."

  • НЕЧАЯННО НАГРЯНЕТ ..., by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "В гостиной повисла напряжённая тишина. Дарье вспомнилось с каким энтузиазмом когда-то отец вызвался быть судьёй, а Хэлен всю ночь не спала - рисовала "скрижали" с семейными "заповедями" для Дарьи и Квин."

  • Lies of Life, by Princess_Pasta (part 6): "He was reminded of the reason he avoided Dega Street as much as possible. There were too many painful memories, too many things that liked to slap him in the face and let him know that he wasn't over it."

  • Mysteries of Lawndale 02: The First Party, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 5): "'I see,' Sandi said. 'I see that she's spending more time with the Mystery Club, rather than the Fashion Club! I have to do something about it.' She didn't know what at that time though..."

  • The Spoilsport Agenda: Erratic Pulse, by Silver (part 1): "The room was lit poorly, by two sources. One, the dim, stormy light of the impossible place that lay between worlds. The other the light at the base of the hologram, a constantly shifting fractal."

  • The Spoilsport Agenda: Fallen Angels and Sharks, by Brother Grimace (part 2): "After the word got out that a lot of us were tossed out, the job offers started coming in."

  • Threes Company (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "Daria, Jane, and Tom exchanged worried glances before they turned to address their families."

Saturday, April 25, 2015

So...Genetically Modified Penguins?

Sandi's trying out statement in honor of World Penguin Day, which some Daria fans are more interested in than others. Cough.

This is also National DNA Day, and the school nurse is ready to collect your DNA samples and take your voluntary urine sample. Let's just hope Ms. Li isn't planning to unleash any unholy abominations on us.

Fandom News!

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Is She Wearing a Wig or Did She Dye Her Hair Again?

Jane's looking a little less than adorable for Shirley Temple's birthday. The late actress was born on this day in 1928, and I'd just like to see anybody try to convince Jane to sing or tap dance. Then again, Nathan got her to wear a snood, so....

It's also William Shakespeare's birthday (in 1564) and the anniversary of his death (in 1616). I'm not going to even try to list all the Daria fanworks that cross over with or reference Shakespeare, because then we'd be here all day. You can post your favorites in the comments, though!

Fanfic Update!
  • ВАРИАЦИИ, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Джейн никак не могла понять саму себя — на самом деле у них с Томом всё шло к тому чтобы расстаться. Напряжение между ней и Слоуном только росло, а она не могла не замечать, что Тома явно и недвусмысленно тянет к Дарье. Надо было быть слепой чтобы не заметить."

  • Fallen Angels and Sharks, by Brother Grimace (part 1): "As everything was getting settled – and I woke up after the best week-long 'Fuck you, Judith, you're dead as TV dials and we're still here!' party the universe will ever see – every single Ringbearer that joined in with me to go after Judith was summoned to the Sky Vault Avalon."

  • Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 3): "'This is just wrong,' Jane grumbled to herself as she walked through the mostly empty parking lot, 'Going back to Lawndale High, on a Sunday.'"

  • NMI (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'So, how is it going "Naomi"?' Jane asked. 'Ha ha,' Daria said. 'At least my middle name isn't a joke from a bad Tom Hanks movie.'"

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Out of a luxury private jet came Tom Sloane, his sister Elsie, and for some reason Charles Ruttheimer III, who was talking to the others."

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

God Save the Teen

Brittany is looking very regal as Queen Elizabeth II, who is celebrating her 89th birthday today. We'd all be in a lot of trouble if Brittany ever ended up in charge of an entire country, mostly because she'd probably require everyone to attend pep rallies. Ugh.

Fandom News!

Sunday, April 19, 2015

Please Do Not Operate Bicycles While Tripping!

Daria's gotten into the spirit of Bicycle Day, although I should point out the holiday has less to do with bikes than with LSD. Still, that means today's probably an important one for Coyote and Willow Yeager, not to mention their dog, Leary--who is named after Timothy Leary.

Fanfic Update!
  • Ah, Hell, by metameric1 (parts 29 and 30): "'...So that's where she's at. She understands the situation but her heart is another matter. Trent wants to make it special for her, but they can't do it themselves while they're touring... I say this is the cure.'" (Part 30)

  • Another thrilling weekend in suburbia, by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "Another thrilling weekend in suburbia. I sink further back into the couch and flip through the channels. Nothing good is on, not even anything worth mocking."

  • ASPS, by PrecambrianStudios (part 82): "When he decided that he had walked far enough, Gage Thystun sank down onto the curb and took a bite out of his sandwich. After he swallowed, he said out loud to nobody in particular, 'Well, that could have gone better.'"

  • The College Diaries, by CaffeineAddict94 (part 2): "The sound of a door slamming shut woke Natalie Redmond from her light slumber, startling the slender redhead so much that she almost toppled out of bed."

  • Daria/Power Rangers: Watching the Watchmen, by Charles RB (part 16): "Tick, tock. A second Org had attacked Turtle Cove; infantry held it for three tanks with A10 air support to arrive and hit it with sustained fire, with the loss of only eleven servicemen (four of them in a tank crew) and twenty nine civilians."

  • Lies of Life, by Princess_Pasta (part 5): "Dega Street was exactly what Daria expected: grungy, dirty, and very faux-punk. She wasn't surprised to see that Lawndale made some sort of effort to cater to its alternative population, no matter how small that number may have been."

  • What if? What if? What if the town blew away?, by BrittaBot (part 1): "Just a few hours ago her school had broken out into song. Now, her world was falling apart."

Friday, April 17, 2015

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na Bat Jane!

Jane's doing an approximate impersonation of Batgirl for Bat Appreciation Day, and I don't think anyone can appreciate them the way Jane does: "I've always wanted to sleep upside-down and spread rabies." Whether or not she likes to use sonar to locate insects to eat is not mentioned, but I will note that her brother appears to be nocturnal. Perhaps battiness runs in the family!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Jodie da Lawndale

Jodie's being pulled in even more directions than usual today because it's the anniversary of Leonardo da Vinci's birth in 1452. In addition to drawing the Vitruvian Man, which Jodie is being depicted as, da Vinci was a painter, an architect, a sculptor, an engineer, and so much more. If Jodie's parents catch wind of all his extracurricular activities, Jodie will never have a moment's peace.

Fanfic Update!
  • Ah, Hell, by metameric1 (parts 26 - 28): "Daria looked around the lovely space that she had called her office sadly. All her books and mementos that were to make the move were packed away safely, a few boxes dropped off at a charity, and a few items had made the trip back to Lawndale with her parents." (Part 27) (Part 28)

  • The College Diaries, by CaffeineAddict94 (part 1): "Pepperhill University was ranked at number ten on the list of the best schools in West Virginia, the campus itself both beautiful and historic. While academics were still a main focus, most of the students attended for the wide variety of social opportunities. Included in that number was Quinn Morgendorffer."

  • Consequences, by ST91 (part 9): "'You want what?' asked Ms. Li. 'You heard right, Ms. Li. I want my brother off the team.'"

  • Doctor Who: Season 8.5 (Chapter 1), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "'Thing is, since I found out that Gallifrey wasn't destroyed, I haven't done anything about it,' the Doctor said."

  • Fifteen Years Later, by Meagana (part 2): "Helen was weak, it had been a day since the heart attack, she was lying there, but still on her blackberry, or trying too, she couldn't do much in her current state."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "'Quinn Morgendorffer, as author of the essay 'Academic Imprisonment', the High Council of Fashion finds you guilty of unfashionable intellectualism and treason against the ways of Fashion. As such, we strip you of the right to be fashionable. You are now and forever branded heretic, cast out as neither brain nor fashionista. You are, now and for the remaining days of your life, a hipster! Doomed to be too fashionable for intellectualism, but too intelligent for fashion!'"

  • Y Esto Es Mystik Spiral II, by taitolin (COMPLETE!): "-pensar que cuando miraba los programas de la tele donde mostraban la vida de los famosos yo pensaba porque no... algun dia... y asi paso mi vida pensando en que algun dia haria algo..."

Monday, April 13, 2015

And Then Celebrate Winning the Game by Playing the Harmonica!

Daria's enjoying a nice, prison-focused board game in honor of Scrabble Day, and I don't think it's surprising to anyone that she's winning.

Interestingly, today is also the anniversary of Thomas Jefferson's birth in 1743. The episode that Scrabble picture was taken from, "The Big House," also featured several quotes that may or may not have been from him (or was it Stalin?).

Fandom News!

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Sweet Ade-Quinn!

Joey, Jeffy, and that other one are singing for Barbershop Quartet Day, although they really need a fourth member if they want to be accurate. Regardless, unless they know any Boys 'R' Guys tunes then I doubt Quinn will be impressed.

This also happens to be National Submarine Day, which provides a good excuse to read The Blue and Yellow Submarine by the late, great Decelaraptor. Not that you need an excuse--it's an excellent story!

Fanfic Update!
  • ASPS 3, by PrecambrianStudios (part 5): "'The fourth failsafe?' Karis said as Michelle paced nervously back and forth across her room, her artificial eye buzzing loudly. 'What’s that?'"

  • Consequences, by ST91 (part 8): "From that moment on, things went well for Clint and Jane. Over time their bond grew stronger. Until one Friday night, taking advantage of the fact that Clint's house was free, they decided to go all the way."

  • Great Professor Dario Ch. 1, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "'Nice to meet you Ms. Lane, I'm Dario Morgendorffer. Mr. Morgendorffer is my father.' 'I imagine so. If you were my patient, my presence here would be useless. May I come in?'"

  • The Many Doctors - Chapter 27, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "'No way. This is too mad. You're telling me I can phone anyone, anywhere in space and time on my mobile?' she asked. 'Yes,' Felicia said, holding up her own phone."

  • Notes, by metameric1 (part 20): "Wow, it's been awhile. Things are going nuts around here."

  • ТРЕТИЙ СОН ДАРЬИ МОРГЕНДОРФФЕР, byShad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Пе­чаль­ный го­лос док­то­ра: «Мне очень жаль ... Мы сде­лали всё, что мог­ли ... Но ...» Блед­ный как сте­на, к ко­торой он при­валил­ся, Трент. Су­дорож­но сжа­тые ку­лаки. 'Дже­ни­ии ...' По­белев­шие кос­тяшки паль­цев."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): "DARIA (VOICE OVER): I'll never forget the weekend Jane died."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): "'Yo, Mack Daddy—better get out here,' Kevin called from the hallway. Mack cuffed Daria to the bed. 'I told you not to call me that,' he replied."

Thursday, April 9, 2015


Upchuck is living out his greatest fantasy--and the Fashion Club's greatest nightmare--in honor of Hugh Hefner's birthday. The Playboy publisher turns 89 today, and I have little doubt that Upchuck would love to follow in his footsteps.

Today is also National Cherish an Antique Day, so it's time to gather up all of your old valuables. I don't care if it's a pink water pistol, a peanut-butter sandwich from the tank, or a complete 1985 California Raisins posable eraser set; start cherishing them all!

Fandom News!

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Just Don't Let Kevin Start Singing about Beer on the Wall

It's National Beer Day and Brittany's already making the rounds. Kevin's probably knocked himself out trying to smash the glass mugs on his head, thinking they're beer cans, and don't worry about running out; the Keg Queen is on her way.

Also, the episodes "This Year's Model" and "I Loathe a Parade" first aired on this day in 1997 and 2000. Two unsolved mysteries: did anything ever come of Kevin's modeling career and did Jake ever get his hands on some toilet paper?

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by TheTuxedo (part 1): "'We have a new STUDENT, Trent. Seeing as SHE'S already introduced herself, it's ONLY FAIR if you introduce yourself to her.'"

  • Consequences, by ST91 (part 7): "Things were not going well for Clint and Jane. Now mind you, their date wasn't a disaster, but it was full of embarrassed silences and awkaward behavior."

  • Fifteen Years Later, by Meagana (part 1): "Daria life was perfect 15 years after High School, but it would do."

  • Jane's First Game (Iron Chef - Jane plays Football), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "After Jane's literal verbal dissection of Ms. Li at that assembly. I thought she would be shunned by Li. She wasn't."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "Daria sat at the small table on the generously sized, dome-covered balcony. Luxuries like this were few amongst the Data Angels, available to those who'd managed something truly impressive."

Sunday, April 5, 2015

Joey's Easter Surprise

Happy Easter! I don't have any pictures of the Easter Bunny, but here we see Joey providing everyone with plenty of Easter Eggs. Um, you go ahead. I'll pass.

On a less creepy note, please enjoy these Easter-themed fanfics and fanart from the Sh33p's Fluff website: Fandom News!

Friday, April 3, 2015

Like Helen Would Miss Work Even If It Wasn't Fun

Helen's clearly enjoying herself, possibly because it's Don't Go to Work Unless it's Fun Day and I'm not sure she makes any distinction between "work" and "fun." I guess if that makes her happy, who am I to question her priorities, life choices, and/or sanity?

Passover begins at sundown tonight, so "Chag Sameach" to the Jewish Daria fans out there.

Fanfic Update!
  • A Boring Summer, by ST91 (part 7): "Ground, please swallow me up! Dario pleaded mentally after hearing Brittany giggling."

  • Daria: College Pains The Sophomore Year, by James the Lesser (part 6): "Daria is walking to the parking lot from class when she sees Tony. They had not spoken since he had broken up with Mary. 'Uh, hey.' 'Oh, hey Daria. Just out of class?'"

  • Getting out of Mandatory Summer Activities (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "Daria walked down the back alley to the Good Times Chinese takeout restaurant while carrying a suitcase in addition to her backpack."

  • In Defense, by neonhomer (COMPLETE!): "Under the carport, Trent paused as he closed the umbrella, shaking the water from it, before placing it into a plastic bag. He turned to follow after Jane, who was standing in front of the double wooden doors, hand on the handle, unmoving. 'Janey?' 'I'm okay, Trent.' 'No, you're not.'"

  • Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 2): "Jane stood back from her latest work, tapping her finger against her cheek, trying to figure out why she wasn't satisfied. Her brother poked his head in her door 'Hey Janey, Daria's on the phone,' he said in his usual raspy voice."

  • A Nutty Day at Work, by HetaliaLove88 (COMPLETE!): "Daria Morgendorffer had been forced by her mother to begin to work at Nutty Nutty Nutty World a few days ago. Unfortunately, she worked alongside Kevin Thompson, who still hadn't learned to read the labels on the tubs of nuts in the little stand that the both of them worked at."

  • Redux, by Princess_Pasta (part 18): "Quinn didn't expect to have anybody barging into her room while she was getting ready but, then again, she didn't know what to expect anymore."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "The duo sat down heavily at one of the empty tables in Good Times Chinese Restaurant. They looked the odd pair, the scrawny Trent Lane and the much stouter 'Mack' Mackenzie."

Wednesday, April 1, 2015

April Fool!

Aunt Amy is in a silly mood for April Fool's Day, the day when you cannot trust anything anyone says to you, under any circumstances. Including me. Bwa-ha-ha-ha!

So, remember back on this day in 2007 when all the inanimate objects in the world came to life and plotted their secret takeover? Good thing Jane Lane was able to warn us ahead of time.

Fandom News!

Monday, March 30, 2015

"Ooh-la-la! Doctor, I have a pain."

It's National Doctor's Day, so this might be a good time to get that weird rash looked at. Just don't ask about Mrs. Sullivan, who just lay there and...never mind.

Jane would also be interested to know that today is the anniversary of the births of both Francisco de Goya in 1746 and Vincent van Gogh in 1853. We know from "The New Kid" and "Art Burn" that she has an interest in both of those artists, so she has twice the reason to celebrate.

Fanfic Update!
  • Great Professor Dario Ch. 1, by ST91 (part 7): "So Dario ascended the stairs, walked to the room of his parents and knocked on the ajar door. 'Come in.' Said a hoarse voice from within. Dario came in and as always, at the sight of his father lying in bed, a deep sadness took possession of him."

  • The Hallowed Halls Takes a Holiday (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "After St. Patrick's Day couldn't convince him with the beer breath trick, Cupid took Tom's hand and said in a smooth voice, 'Now, you should feel relaxed and warm...'"

  • Lawndale and Sandi Griffin's Genie: Future Excerpt 1, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "Chipmunk's Dream Chip was standing outside Lawndale High. She could see that the school buildings were still intact. She knew that there was something inside, that needed to be dealt with. She was prepared to go in and find it, and if necessary, take it out. She started walking towards the office."

  • Lies of Life, by Princess_Pasta (part 4): "If she wanted to get Daria to talk, they'd have to go somewhere that she couldn't hide. Helen made a mental note to take a day off of work; Daria had become her top priority."

  • My Dad the DirectorXXX, by macrossfan89 (part 2): "It had been several months since Daria Morgendorffer's family secret had been revealed on national television. As she had expected she soon had to suffer the questions of dozen of horny male classmates, and deal with disapproving stares from her fellow female students."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef : MMORPG, Lawndale style), by Waylander (part 7): "The Gnoll warrior, already used to Darlene's evasive fighting, wasn't ready for the girl throwing herself at his feet and thrusting the knife upwards with all the force she could muster. Critical Hit!"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Somehow, Mack managed to pull away from a fiery embrace with Elsie and her overly skilled tongue ('We must be honest with ourselves,' as his uncle would always say)."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Daria: You have two cows. Nobody buys your milk because they think the cows are weird."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "Daria relaxed. Her hands let go of the control yokes as the mekton toppled backwards, sending the machine and its pilot into freefall. Above her, the first of the long-dormant anti-satellite cannons flickered, then flared to brilliant light."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "Dr. Richard Meriton, Chairman of the Maryland State Board of Education, calmly looked up from the papers in front of him and stared at Angela Li. 'Do you know why you were asked here today, Ms. Li?'"

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by ashk09 (COMPLETE!): "So engrossed was she in observing Daria and Maud's conversation about speleology - literally, they had been discussing nothing but the formation of caves for the past hour - Jane didn't notice a figure descending from the ceiling like a bat."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Director Fury, the Council has made a decision.'"

  • When love takes another path CH.4, by ST91 (part 1): "'Tom, are you awake?' asked Daria. 'Yes, unfortunately I can't sleep.' 'Neither can I. Tom, what do you think will happen now?'"

  • Y esto es Mystik Spiral, by taitolin (COMPLETE!): " insatisfacción que siento no es ajeno al que muchos de ustedes lo habrá sentido en algún momento de sus vidas, esa emoción que nos daba ahora nos causa aburrimiento... Trent doblo el papel y lo desecho en el cesto de basura, otro discurso mas que no le convencía."

Saturday, March 28, 2015

Weed Appreciation Day

Trent just found out that it's Weed Appreciation Day, and he seems pretty happy about it. Of course, that's not actually the kind of weed this holiday is celebrating, but why ruin it for him? Besides, he looks like he might have a song lyric brewing.

Fandom News!

Thursday, March 26, 2015

Dude Looks Like a Fashionista

Sandi's wishing a rocking happy birthday to Steven Tyler, who turns 67 today. Quinn would be the first to tell you what a big mouth Sandi has, but the huge belt and striped bell bottoms are a new addition.

Speaking of Sandi's downfalls, this also happens to be the anniversary of "Lucky Strike," which aired on this day in 2001. Quinn finally, finally admitted that Daria was actually her sister, and everyone but Sandi failed to give a crap.

Fanfic Update!
  • Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 1): "Daria sighed and sat up. She glanced at her clock and saw that it was three thirty-four. Cursing the fact that her very important lounging was being cut short so that Quinn could get a ride to her friend's house, she grabbed the remote and turned off the TV."

  • Jane Scores (Iron Chef - Jane plays Football), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria walked with Jane as they travelled to their favorite pizza place after another day at Lawndale High. 'So.' Daria began. 'So?' Jane asked. 'How was football practice?' Daria finally asked."

  • Lies of Life, by Princess_Pasta (part 3): "'So, you have everything in your notes, right?' Quinn asked as her and Jane exited the school, 'And you can bring them in tomorrow?' Jane nodded, 'Yeah, you'll be out of there in no time.'"

  • Loves Me This Much (Iron Chef: Quinn's Trashfreak out), by macross (COMPLETE!): "She looked down at her hands; they were starting to turn white from the constant nervous wringing. 'Any minute now,' she thought. 'Any minute now she'll walk through the front door and I'll finally tell her that I know'."

  • QB-Wave Feminism, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "The team thought this over and agreed, in gutteral noises, that this random girl was indeed a slut. That was when Kevin coughed. 'Dude, that's not cool.'"

  • The Return of Mike Mavinsky, by PerkyGoth14 (part 1): "In the year 2020. It was for the 20th anniversary of Cartoon Cartoon Fridays and many people came back for the reunion."

  • The Spoilsport Agenda: Multiversal Breakdown Tsunami, by Erin M. (part 1): "Judith opened her eyes again, now back to their normal brown. She leaned over the table, her face bathed in the blue light. A grin crossed her face. If I lose, they are absolutely going to shit themselves over this."

Tuesday, March 24, 2015


Upchuck is happy to celebrate the birth of one of his idols, Harry Houdini, who was born on this day in 1874. Houdini is one of the world's most famous magicians, although I don't think any of his assistants wore sparkly costumes and non-waterproof mascara.

Today also marks two anniversaries, because both "Cafe Disaffecto" and "The Lost Girls" aired on this day in 1997 and 1999. We didn't see any magic shows in either of those episodes, although Daria did demonstrate a pretty impressive degree of mind control over her fellow students in the former and made an aging narcissist disappear in the latter.

Fandom News!

Sunday, March 22, 2015

"Help! Whoa! I'm drowning!"

Sandi doesn't seem to be enjoying World Water Day, but don't let that stop you from celebrating. In fact, that might be all the more reason to celebrate! I have no doubt Quinn is doing exactly that, but once Sandi gets out and dries off she'll definitely pretend otherwise.

Fanfic Update!
  • ARC ch. 7 Another day, another pain, by ST91 (part 3): "Daria, this time you have to admit that you're in a very bad shape. Thought the bespectacled girl looking at her reflection in the mirror."

  • Daria Plus, by Smijey (part 2): "Daria walked out of Mrs. Manson's office, deep in thought. Having nothing better to do, she'd once again plunged into New Game Plus, and this time toed the line to her memories of the initial playthrough."

  • Esteem de Tres (I.C./Discussion - Third Morgendorffer Sister à la Helen), by GlitterShrooms (part 1): "'Daria! Quinn! Let's go! I'm not gonna be late because of you two!' shouted Helena Jasmine, or HJ for short, up the staircase."

  • General Semantics, Private Angst, by gwrtheyrn (part 46): "Tony DeMartino, still without scheduling that long-overdue knee repair, discharged himself from Cedars of Lawndale two days later."

  • The Kiss (IC: Challenged by D), by dmsfanman (COMPLETE!): "Tom came up behind her, pulled her auburn hair back on her right side and gently kissed her neck. Then he put his arms around her slender waist and said quietly in her ear, 'What are you thinking about Daria?'"

  • Medical Test (Iron Chef: Start In The Middle of an Action Sequence), by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): "Blood is black when you're using night vision goggles to see."

  • Misery Machine, by NightGoblyn (part 9): "A few days later, the evening of the poster competition rolled around. Jane borrowed a clunky black van from one of her brother's band mates, and ferried the group down to the civic center."

  • Star Trek: Emerging Enterprise, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "'That must have hit a nerve, Jim,' Bones said to his Captain and friend. 'That is for certain,' Jim Kirk said. 'They are most likely people from the real universe who were sent into the simulation to investigate the situation with the Enterprise,' Spock said."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Astrocar82 (COMPLETE!): "'Do you have any rat poison?' Tom Griffin asked as he walked into a hardware store."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "The Doctor spun around to see Daria staring at him with a seductive twinkle in her eye. He immediately thought, 'Oh no. Not now, why does this always happen to me?'"

Friday, March 20, 2015

This Spaceship is Reeeeeeally Shiny

Tiffany is about to celebrate Extraterrestrial Abductions Day by kidnapping us all and taking her to her home planet so she can ask us repeatedly if things make her look fat. Kind of makes the horror of probing pale in comparison, doesn't it?

Come to think of it, it actually makes more sense than it should that Tiffany could be an alien. Honestly, I'm surprised there aren't any (or at least many) fanfics exploring that possibility. Perhaps she was the one those agents in "The Lawndale File" were really looking for!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Hopefully Old MacDonald's Not About to Get Sued

Helen is getting back to basics on National Agriculture Day, but I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for any hand-kneaded bread. The girls are getting liberated, after all. Trent might be interested, though, if he ever takes Tom and Daria's advice about becoming a farmer who's paid not to grow crops.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria Plus, by Smijey (part 1): "Daria blinked. "What the hell?" she said aloud. She was in a formless void, black as far as the eye could see."

  • ПОСЛЕДНЯЯ ПОСЛЕДНЯЯ(?) ГЛАВА, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "На самом деле, вылазка в парк, была для подруг краткой передышкой, возможностью, на очень короткое время, вынырнуть на поверхность, глотнуть свежего воздуха, словно двум пловчихам."

  • ПОСЛЕДНЯЯ (?) ГЛАВКА, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Солнце пробивалось сквозь листву и Дарья, голова которой лежала на животе Джейн, прикрыла глаза. Разноцветные пятна плавали в темноте под веками, а рука Джейн, в это время ласково теребила волосы подруги."

  • Lies of Life, by Princess_Pasta (part 2): "Jane Lane looked up from her sketchbook in time to see the late arrival. The slender red-head standing in the front of the classroom was far too well-dressed to be lumped in with the rejects in Mr. O'Neill's self-esteem class."

Monday, March 16, 2015

"Stupid five-sided building!"

Jake, Helen, and all of their hippie friends are channeling their energy in support of the episode "That Was Then, This Is Dumb," which aired on this day in 1998. In addition to those flashbacks, we learned an awful lot about Jake and Helen's past in that one, most notably that Helen used to be famous for her oatmeal pumpkin seed loaf. We also found out that there exists at least one boy who's impervious to Quinn's influence.

Fandom News!

Saturday, March 14, 2015

Definitely Don't Hold This One Tightly in Your Hand!

It's Learn about Butterflies Day, and Daria appears to be taking the direct approach to learning. Jane's not interested, because she's learned as much as she cares to about butterflies from her mother.

For the math geeks out there, this is also National Pi Day--3/14! Have some pie, either dessert or pizza, but make sure you calculate the circumference before you eat it. If you're not already aware, today at 9:26:53 it will be 3/14/15 9:26:53, which corresponds to 3.141592653, the beginning digits of pi. Geek on, my friends!

Fanfic Update!
  • ПРЕКРАСНЫЕ УТРА, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Том на­пил­ся. Пер­вый раз в жиз­ни. Ут­ром по­нял, что в пос­ледний."

  • ХОЛОДНЫЙ ДОМ, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "... Дарья открыла глаза ... Она ушла из своей палаты ранним утром и свернулась в этом кресле клубочком не только чтобы быть поближе к Джейн. Больничная кровать оказалась вампиром — Дарья чувствовала себя не отдохнувшей — скорее наоборот — ослабевшей ... И этот сон ..."

  • A Boring Summer, by ST91 (part 6): "As the first act of his work as a tutor, Dario asked Brittany which were the subjects in which she had difficulty and of these, which were the most difficult topics. Once he learned that Brittany had difficulty in all subjects except PE and that for each subject there were many topics not clear to her, an hour and a half had passed and the situation wasn’t very good."

  • #eyepatchgate (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Joe Adler sidled up to the witness stand, at which sat the cool, composed Daria Morgendorffer sat. He had her dead to rights, and nobody, not even that shark lawyer of a mother she had, could do anything about it."

  • Lies of Life, by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "'I'm sorry, Daria, there's just nothing I can do.' 'You don't understand. I need this grade. All I'm asking for is a few more days. Three at the most.' 'My hands are tied. I'm sorry.'"

Thursday, March 12, 2015

Plant a Flower at Camp Grizzly...and Skip Will Trample It

The Tommy Sherman Memorial Tree/Crutch is celebrating Plant a Flower Day, in one of the odder canon events during the show. If you'd like, feel free to plant one in the ground, which would probably be easier.

This is also the anniversary of the episode "Camp Fear," which aired on this day in 2001. Not only was this episode notable for introducing Amelia, but it also showed us animated versions of two Daria fans: Michelle Klein-Hass and Erin Mills. Sadly, neither of them got to try Earl and Barbara's no salt, no grease, no taste potato chips.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Some Middle Names are More Worthy of Pride Than Others

Mack and Jodie are leaping for joy because it's Middle Name Pride Day and, well, they're the only characters on Daria who officially have middle names--Jordan and Abigail. Of course, I doubt Mack's really feeling all that proud of his middle name, but let's just allow him his moment of happiness.

Today is also a triple anniversary, because it was on this day that the episodes "The Invitation," "Depth Takes a Holiday," and "A Tree Grows in Lawndale" first aired in 1997, 1999, and 2000. Bonus points to anyone who can come up with a good connecting thread among those three episodes, because I'm coming up blank.

Fanfic Update!
  • "Aw Mama...Can This Really Be The End?", by Scissors MacGillicutty (part 37): "The man took off his straw hat and set it on the blue and white seersucker jacket folded by his side on the bench. Looking out the window, he smoothed his thinning white hair, and called to the young man seated at the counter to his left, 'Eton?'"

  • Consequences, by ST91 (part 6): "Clint was nervous. The idea of having an official date with Jane terrified him."

  • A Night In Manhattan: A Griffin Story, by Meester_Lee (part 1): "It was one of those kinds of visits, with business that couldn't be done quickly and settled during the course of a morning or an afternoon. He'd have to stay over. It was also the sort of visit that required a measure of anonymity, so he chose to conceal himself in crowds and take a hotel room in a Muggle part of New York."

  • Origins of the Ringbearers - Michael, by Brother Grimace (part 3): "Angela Li – all eighteen years and five-feet three of her, with the face of a runway model and the air of a puppy acting as if were an attack dog – stood her ground in front of Mark Schindler's desk."

  • РАЗГОВОРЫ ..., РАЗГОВОРЫ ..., by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Дарья не могла винить Линди. Она сама, Дарья-«мозг»-ботан конченный, не заметила как младшая сестрёнка выросла — впервые стала сопереживать другому, вынула голову из тряпок и увидела, что непраильно подобраные(не под цвет глаз) носки ещё не трагедия, а вышедший из моды галстук не мировая катастрофа."

  • Physical Teducation (The Ted Zone), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "That could be me, he realized with growing hope. Perhaps I could enroll in some kind of sport and get my name in the newspaper! And then everyone at school would notice me!"

  • Runaway Daria : Guardians of the Galaxy (IC Runaway Daria), by Waylander (COMPLETE!): "As the leader of the infamous Ravagers, Yondu Udonta was a business man first and foremost. He had been accustomed to all forms of depravity, and barely batted an eye at his customers' outrageous requests... at least if the price was right."

  • Spelling It Out (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'A school-wide spelling bee to foster academic awareness and pride.' Daria's foul mood was fully evident even to Principal Li and Mr. O'Neill, who were standing at the edge of the auditorium stage as they watched the proceedings."

  • Spirit Stick, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Well... that isn't good.' Valkyrie felt her Ring's defensive shield snap into existence; in the cool, early evening air alive with the shimmer of the Aurora Borealis, she saw the momentary twinkle of a crystal-blue oval surround Archangel as his shield activated."

  • The Ultimate Showdown (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Jane passed the note to the new girl who sat across from her in the self-esteem class. 'You slam?' she'd written."

  • Unnamed story (Mr. O'Neill, Asshole), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria kept one ear open as Mr. O'Neill lectured to the children making tchotchke after tchotchke. 'Now, I want each of you to think of the blue lanyard as representing how you feel on the inside, and the green as how my wallet feels on the inside. Picture --'"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "Daria awoke with a start. Correction: A start and the greatest great-grandmother of all headaches. Her hands shot to her head, and she stifled a cry of pain."

Sunday, March 8, 2015

So Much for the Lawndale Businesswoman's Alliance

Stay out of Linda Griffin's way today--she just found out she has to share International (Working) Women's Day with Helen Morgendorffer, and the fallout is not going to be pretty. Also, please don't mention the holiday to Michele Landon; she's a bit sensitive about the subject of women and careers. And about everything else, too.

Fandom News!

Friday, March 6, 2015

A Toothy Problem

Mr. O'Neill is sharing some bad news in honor of Dentist's Day, which is probably that he's no better as a dentist than he was as a teacher. No wonder Mr. DeMartino--I mean, Metalmouth--lost all of his teeth.

On the other hand, those of you who can still chew food can enjoy National Frozen Food Day, and bonus points to anyone who has frozen lasagna for dinner. Just be sure to thaw it out first, okay? Not everyone has hand-forged steel dentures to eat with.

Fanfic Update!
  • ВСТРЕЧА, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Квин чувствовала себя ... не в своей тарелке. Что отдавало дурацким каламбуром - потому что в этот момент она сидела за столиком кафе как раз над тарелкой и задумчиво ковыряла вилкой в салате."

  • Correspondence, by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "Dear Mr. DeMartino: I write in response to your letter of the 9th February. Before I address its contents, I should state that I personally find its allegations as of being of a particularly grave nature."

  • Daria: College Pains The Sophomore Year, by James the Lesser (part 5): "Jane is with... She never got his name. She had never given him hers. This was just two people helping others and when they needed it, helping each other."

  • The Daria Hero, by EntrancedCat (part 1): "Daria put a bit of hustle into her walk to 111 Howard Drive. Although she was very much looking forward to that night's entertainment she also steeled herself for Jane's likely reactions."

  • Unnamed story (IC: Mr. O'Neill, Student Guidance Councilor), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Attention, students! I have the honor to announce at this mandatory all-school assembly that Mr. O'Neill is being promoted!'"

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef : MMORPG, Lawndale style), by Waylander (part 6): "Gnolls started the assault without the preliminary bombardment; ignoring the hail of arrows from the squad of Elven archers and several Dwarven crossbowmen, they placed ladders up against the Drammarstard walls and started climbing. The Healer jabbed her elbow into Darlene's side, 'Don't stand here gaping at me! You can either help us or stay out of the way!'"

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Reject a Daria Character), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Dear Mr Thompson I'm afraid that we do not have a place at LSU for you."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Reject a Daria Character), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "Dear Mr. Lane, We regret to inform you that your partially completed application will not be considered for admittance."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Reject a Daria Character), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Dear Mr. Ruttheimer, It pains me to write that we will not be able to offer you a place in the class entering Augusta University this fall."

  • We Can't, by probablyprocrastinatingnow (part 2): "Jane picked up a handful of soggy popcorn.'Eww, Daria. There's like a gallon of butter on this.' Jane put the food in her mouth anyway, because it was food and she was Jane."

  • What is Fashion?, by Smijey (part ): "'Like, it's like I can't trust anybody to tell me what fashion is,' she mused aloud. 'Things keep going wrong.' She walked past a Kay Jeweler's. 'I wish there was a way to ask, like, God, or the universe, or whatever, what I should be doing.'"

  • When love takes another path, by ST91 (parts 2 and 3): "It was a cold evening in late autumn and Jake Morgendorffer, freshman at Middleton College, was walking around the campus. He didn't know where he was going because anger guided his steps." (Part 3)

  • Woes (IC: Mr. O'Neill, Student Guidance Councilor), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "'Now, I want you to tell me all about your feelings following this recent disastrous event. It must've been catastrophic for you, being at the epicenter of it all.' 'Dude, I didn't even know we had a library!'"

  • You're History! (Iron Chef: DeMartino History Class), by dmsfanman (COMPLETE!): "Daria walked through the door into Mr. DeMartino's classroom. Jane followed on her heels and the two sat down in the front row on the side of the classroom nearest the door."