Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Because It's Been Awhile....

Caption this image in the comments!

Monday, March 2, 2015

The Kook in the Book

Today is a Ted-a-riffic day, because both DeWitt Clinton, the American politician that Ted DeWitt-Clinton was likely named after, and Theodor Seuss Geisel, better known as Dr. Seuss, were born on this day in 1769 and 1904. I have no idea if Ted's ever read "The Cat in the Hat," but I'm sure his parents would condemn it as an empty offering of society or something like that.

Also on this day in 1998, the episode "Quinn the Brain" first aired and taught us that Daria and Quinn should never venture outside of their prescribed roles. Until season four, anyway.

Fandom News!

Saturday, February 28, 2015


Daria and Jane are busy observing Public Sleeping Day, or they would if Quinn would finally give them some peace. Trent seems to prefer sleeping in private, but I have no doubt he's nodded off in public before. Possibly even while onstage.

Also, happy birthday to Geoffrey Arend, who voiced Upchuck and turns 37 today. He also voiced one-time characters like Ken Edwards, Leonard Lamm (the Ultra Cola exec from "Fizz Ed"), and the Assistant Bursar from "College Bored" ("You play the ponies, Jake?"). He must have had a talent for playing the sleazy guys...let's hope he's not like that in real life!

Fanfic Update!
  • The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (part 159): "The senior leadership of Tops had reached out to Jill. They wanted to speak to Quinn as soon as possible. Jill guessed what it was about. Clearly, Quinn was going to be invited back into Tops in a big way."

  • Quinn's Code 12: Stacy the Brain, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "The teacher then said, 'Stacy? Was there something you wanted to say?' Stacy looked at her table and the tables nearby to ensure that she wasn't mistaken. 'Um, I didn't get my essay back,' she said, her heart racing."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Brian Taylor (COMPLETE!): "'What is this,' said Barry. 'Wow,' said Daria. 'What a mansion.' 'Captain Morgendorffer, where's Chris?'"

  • We Can't, by probablyprocrastinatingnow (part 1): "Jane swore as the red paint dripped toward the bottom of the canvas. 'Stupid paint. Not doing what I want it do.' Daria appeared in the doorway. 'So Jane Lane isn't a talented as we assumed.' she droned monotonously."

Thursday, February 26, 2015

Once Upon a Cynic

Daria's prepared for Tell a Fairy Tale Day, and if we're lucky she'll favor us with her personal spin on Hansel and Gretel ("So the witch tore Hansel's arm off, popped it in her mouth, said, 'Hey, pretty good,' and within minutes had devoured the rest of his body, leaving only the lower intestine for fear of bacteria....") or Cinderella ("So Cinderella skipped the ball and asked her fairy Godmother to make her the first woman president...."). But make fun of her outfit and she'll shove that goose somewhere very unpleasant instead.

Speaking of unpleasant encounters, it was on this day in 2001 that the episode "Sappy Anniversary" first aired, exposing Daria's relationship insecurities for everyone (except Tom, at first) to see. We also got to see just how unbelievably inept Jake is when it comes to technology. Yikes.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Time to Discover the Eunice Inside!

Why is Daria putting contacts in again? Why, all the better to watch "Through a Lens Darkly" with! The episode originally aired on this day in 1999, and I'm sure Daria is really thrilled about reliving that pleasant first encounter with contact lenses. At least the dogs of Lawndale will rest a little easier knowing her peripheral vision is improved now.

Fanfic Update!
  • Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 20): "Herb was getting frustrated at the lack of progress made by his latest pupil. Jane couldn't get past the candle exercise, no matter how hard she tried."

  • Daria: College Pains The Sophomore Year, by James the Lesser (part 4): "Daria pulls in to the driveway early in the morning. She is worried when she doesn't see Jane's car."

  • Mack of All Trades, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'We did it! Woooo!' Kevin cheered, slapping Mack a high-five as they walked off the football field a few days later. 'We're gonna be Glenfield Gladiators!'"

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "Jon Stewart sat at his desk on The Daily Show trying to put forth his usual jovial attitude, 'Today marks the 112th day since Empress Morgendorffer... "ascended" to the "Presidency".'"

Sunday, February 22, 2015

Eat My Dust, Sandi!

Stacy's ready to race the Daytona 500, which is taking place today! Stacy may look like she's making the "I'm number one!" sign, but I suspect she's actually tracing the outline of a clothes hanger. There must be outlet shopping nearby!

This is also Walking the Dog Day, but that's a little risky considering you never know when Daria's going to get behind the wheel.

Fandom News!

Friday, February 20, 2015

I Don't Think I Want Him Handling My Mail

Mr. DeMartino looks either happy or deranged--or maybe both--because as a history teacher he knows that on this day in 1792, George Washington established the U. S. Postal Service. Whether or not Mr. D would be happier as a postal worker than he is as a teacher is open to interpretation, but on the plus side he'd have to deal with Kevin a lot less.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria and the Gang Presents: 1950 (Daria and the Gang), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Daria: Okay, this is a weird thing to start off with in 1950. Ingrid Bergmann's illegitimate child. Tom: As opposed to Ingmar Bergmann's illegitimate child. No one cared about that."

  • Don't you dare (IC : Ms. Morris is Upchuck's aunt), by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "It was a day like many others at Lawndale High and Janet Barch was in the teacher's lounge busy grading the last test of science. At some point, however, someone came in and closed the door."

  • Mack of All Trades, by Kristen Bealer (parts 3 and 4): "The more he thought about it, the more he wanted the underwear to be far away, as far as he could reasonably get them. He thought about all the possible places in Lawndale that one could dispose of unwanted junk and finally settled on the city landfill as the most fitting location." (Part 4)

  • Reaching Skyeward (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Excuse me.' Daria leaned into the conversation like the proverbial grey cloud. 'This is Grant Ward, the kid who firebombed the synagogue?'"

  • Unnamed story (An Old Idea Revisited), by Robyn (part 1): "Evelyn Loken and Jane Lane walk into homeroom and put their bags on the floor. Jane reaches for her sketchpad and Evelyn reaches for a spiral notebook which she uses for a combination of artwork and noting important activities for school and extracurriculars."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef : MMORPG, Lawndale style), by Waylander (part 5): "Darlene, welcome to Altherra! The introductory message transformed into a stylized map of the central continent (in Daria's opinion, it looked like an upside down version of Africa that had an encounter with a giant meteorite)."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "Jane walked into the lab, and noticed A) The whole lab is full of metal coffee mugs which come up to her knees and B) Daria is sitting at a computer looking depressed."

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Just Don't Go to See Her Pastels Afterward

Jane and Alison are celebrating National Drink Wine Day, but I'd suggest Jane scale back a little bit. You never know when a predatory artist is going to try to get in your pants.

Fandom News!

Monday, February 16, 2015

Lincoln and Washington, Bros for Life

It's President's Day, and both presidents are surprisingly excited about it considering the two of them have to share one holiday. Still, as long as nobody wears sandals I guess everything will be fine.

Also, "Arts 'N Crass" first aired on this day in 1998. Highlights of the episode include learning about the extra quart of grease in the pizza recipe, witnessing Helen's moment of triumph, and seeing Brittany's unlikely art contest win. (Seriously, how awful must the other entries have been?!)

Fanfic Update!
  • ASPS, by PrecambrianStudios (part 81): "Wearing a long, emerald-green trenchcoat and a deerstalker cap that barely hid her sunglasses, Karis Chapman tailed Ben Nielsen, making to keep at least fifty feet behind him. Her searching was almost over; she knew he had the answer."

  • Mack of All Trades, by Kristen Bealer (part 2): "Keeping his eyes closed, Mack thought, If he keeps saying his lines in that monotone, I won't need any angels. His dull acting will put me to sleep just fine. And opening night is in three days! I almost feel sorry for the audience."

  • Rising with the Machines... Cynically, by Kuriamo22 (part 3): "The next day Jane noticed Daria was acting a bit quieter than usual as they walked to school on that rather chilly morning. Jane glanced at her friend and noted she looked deep in thought as she stared blankly forward."

  • Unbearable (Daria and the Gang), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "The doorbell rang at the Morgendorffer residence. 'That's for me!' Quinn cried from upstairs. But before she could bound downstairs and get to the door, Jake was already ahead of her. He always liked his chats with Quinn's dates, where he could rap, homie to homie."

  • The Unique, by EntrancedCat (part 2): "'Yondah lies da castle of my foddah. That's got to be the most boring castle ever,' she decided."

Saturday, February 14, 2015

"Everything is cool. Everything is love, baby."

Cupid's looking a little down because it's Valentine's Day and the only date he could find is that Irish midget again. For those of you who are in happy relationships, happy Valentine's Day! For those of you who are not, well, happy half-price candy day eve!

In the meantime, here's some Valentine's-themed fanfic for you to enjoy!

Fandom News!

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Evolution of a President

Andrea's wishing Abraham Lincoln a happy birthday, as the famous U.S. president was born on this day in 1809. And now I'm trying to imagine how the Gettysburg Address would have gone over if Lincoln had started out by calling his audience rotting bags of flesh.

Sharing a birthday with Lincoln, even down to the same year, is Charles Darwin, and in honor of the naturalist who shaped the theory of evolution we celebrate Darwin Day today as well!

Fanfic Update!
  • Butt Frenzy (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked up from her copy of Butt Frenzy and saw what was causing all the noise."

  • Daria: College Pains The Sophomore Year, by James the Lesser (part 3): "Daria wakes up in the back of her car. She is curled up with Conner. 'Ow.' Her back and neck hurt after sleeping in an uncomfortable position the whole night. She has a headache, a clear sign of her hangover."

  • Daria on the Sideline, by dmsfanman (part 8): "Daria walked into the classroom – her classroom – and looked at all of her freshmen."

  • A Day at the Zoo, by piratecaptainatheart (COMPLETE!): "Daria thought it would just be a normal, quiet day in her padded cell of a bedroom; watching Sick Sad World re-runs, trying to block out the sound of her sister's Fashion Club meeting and generally just avoiding doing any of her Summer college work, but everything changed when the doorbell rang."

  • Going Home, by ablackberrywinter (COMPLETE!): "'I can't believe I let Jane talk me into this.' Daria mumbled to herself. At twenty-eight years old, Daria felt that she couldn't be coerced by anyone in this world. Anyone except for Jane Lane, of course."

  • Mack of All Trades, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "'It's just your middle name, so no one even has to know.' 'I'll know,' Mack argued, slouching forward and crossing his arms as they sat on his front porch. His life was totally ruined at the tender age of twelve, and it was all his dad's fault."

  • Spirit Stick, by Brother Grimace (part 16): "'Excuse me. We're still here.' The Ringbearers turned back; they had the good grace to look slightly embarrassed at forgetting that they were in the company of survivors of that world's Reanimate crisis."

  • Stillborn, by Katin (COMPLETE!): "Jane was extra oxygen in a coffin. "Was" being operative. Daria breathed her in too quickly and now she's gone. Daria was suffocating without her."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "The group sitting around the table just stared. And stared. And stared. After nearly three minutes of dumbfounded silence, Tom broke the silence."

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Which PayDay Aisle are the Umbrellas in?

Andrea's got you covered if it rains, which is good because today is Umbrella Day! Of course, if it doesn't rain then she's going to look pretty silly. But this is the girl who willingly left a party with Upchuck of all people, so who knows how her mind works?

Fandom News!

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Is This How Jane Used to Spend Her Time in the Girl Scouts?

Better watch your backs! It's National Girl Scout Cookie Day, and if those pint-sized thugs are any indication of how to celebrate the day, I think I'll pass. Interestingly, today also happens to be Boy Scout Day, so it looks like equal opportunity shakedowns are in order. Lock your doors, people!

Fanfic Update!
  • Brittany and a Pernicious Problem, by Bill Bruford (COMPLETE!): "It was mid morning when they hit the slopes, well one of them did, the other shuffled along trying to keep balance. After many shoot downs of James's idea of chariot scythes on ski's, they began." (Part 5) (Part 6)

  • Fashionably Five Oh, by psychotol (part 1): "Sandi wound up her run around the village she had been moved to."

Friday, February 6, 2015

The Sultan of Sensitive

Mr. O'Neill is smiling because today is the 120th anniversary of George Herman "Babe" Ruth, Jr.'s birth. I think Lawndale must be a football-only town, because I can't recall a single instance of baseball being mentioned on the show. Let me know if there's a reference I'm forgetting in the comments!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Makes Sense; Kevin's Not Very Focused, Either!

Kevin looks even more pleased with himself than usual because on this day in 1789, George Washington was elected president of the United States. Or, as Mrs. Stoller put it, "And so, the people asked George Washington, 'Will you be our new king?'" Whether or not the newly-elected president then scolded a teenage girl for being late to class is anyone's guess.

Fanfic Update!
  • Brittany and a Pernicious Problem, by Bill Bruford (parts 2 and 3): "KNOCK....KNOCK KNOCK 'Come in' Brittany answered the knocks, same apathy plaguing her voice." (Part 3)

  • Doctor Who: Season 8.5, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (prologue): "The Doctor awoke, for real this time as the 'dream crab' expired. 'Clara!' He called out. He scrambled to the TARDIS, which soon dematerialised."

  • E-mails, by BeingFearless (COMPLETE!): "From: Daria To: Jane HELP. I'm bored. TV doesn't work. Come home."

  • Rising with the Machines... Cynically, by Kuriamo22 (part 2): "Daria stood next to an empty street surrounded by darkness.Suddenly she saw of the nearby tree's along the road lit by a flash of blue lightning. She spun away from it in fear to see a bright white light blind her."

  • Slow Flows the River, by UU (part 1bis): "The second most important person in the second most important country in the world cared neither about the bitter cold and the snow falling on his face nor about the most important person shuffling by."

Monday, February 2, 2015

Did the Angel See Her Shadow?

Quinn's filling in for the late Charlie's Angels star Farrah Fawcett, who was born on this day in 1947. The Fashion Club did an homage to the classic TV show in "Murder, She Wrote," although as I recall it was Tiffany who got to model for the famous poster.

This is also Groundhog Day, during which a large rodent is expected to predict the weather. In case you're wondering, Punxsutawney Phil saw his shadow, so it's six more weeks of winter for us. Hooray.

Fandom News!

Saturday, January 31, 2015

As Long As She's Not Painting Reproductions Again

Jane's celebrating Inspire Your Heart with Art Day, but really, that's every day for Jane. Except when it comes to submitting portfolios to art schools, anyway.

Fanfic Update!
  • Brittany and a Pernicious Problem, by Bill Bruford (part 1): "'James Vincent' The man in the white coat said while looking out the bay window in his office. 'You have an outstanding academic record, and two years of work in the medical field already'"

  • The Conformists' Guide To Being Goth, by breitasparrow (COMPLETE!): "All right, douche bags. Listen up. We're getting sick and tired of being lumped in with those stupid vamp kids and, worst of all, the fucking emo wannabe-conformist assholes that have been plaguing our town ever since that prank show tricked us with plants and shit."

  • Daria: College Pains The Sophomore Year, by James the Lesser (part 2): "Quinn is in the house in Lawndale alone. Her parents had moved with LJ to the house in Odenton. They left her some money for food and expected her to look after the house while a Realtor showed the house to potential buyers. Of course her first thought was to throw a party."

  • Daria/Power Rangers: Watching the Watchmen, by Charles RB (parts 14 and 15): "Here was the problem with her bombshell: there was nothing that could be done about it. She made sure to say that. 'Nothing can be done about, nothing can be done about, nothing can be done about. There an echo here?'" (Part 15)

  • НАД СНЕГОМЪ, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "Энтони ДиМартино почувствовал, что лежит на чём то мягком. Мягком но не холодном. Ему вообще не было холодно и то, на чём он лежал, на ощупь не походило на снег."

  • Lawndale & Sandi Griffin's Genie: Future Excerpt 2, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "As Jennifer, Sandi, Sam and Chris entered another room, they found a person there."

  • Lost in Translation and the Misuse of Punctuation (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by GlitterShrooms (COMPLETE!): "It was a beautiful, sunny day in the quiet suburb of Lawndale, and Ms. Daria Morgendorffer was all alone in her room."

  • Midnight in Manhattan, by Noktuo (COMPLETE!): "My second and last night with Quinn, I swear. Jane sipped hot chocolate, looking from the height of San Remo's north tower at the snow-blanketed Central Park down below."

  • Rising with the Machines... Cynically, by Kuriamo22 (part 1): "After looking around the room Daria asked to no one in particular, 'What the hell? How did I get home?'"

  • Star Trek: Emerging Enterprise, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "'So, what is happening? There are error messages saying that the Enterprise is "out of range" and there is a role player on New Australia stuck in her Holosuite without communication? And more importantly, how could this happen?' CEO Robert Findlay asked."

Thursday, January 29, 2015

Magnumdorffer, P.I.

Daria's sporting a new look in honor of Magnum, P.I. star Tom Selleck, who turns 70 years old today. As far as I know his character never investigated any murders involved high school quarterbacks being beaten to death by a golf club, but I haven't actually seen many episodes of the show. Perhaps if he did, the whole thing turned out to be a dream sequence.

Fandom News!

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Cake? Curiouser and Curiouser!

Quinn's serving up a delicious dessert for Chocolate Cake Day, but I'm skeptical that she actually baked it herself. Still, cake is long as it isn't a lie.

Also, happy birthday to the late Charles Lutwidge Dodgson, also known as Lewis Carroll, who was born on this day in 1832. I would list the Alice in Wonderland/Daria crossover fics that have been written, but there are so many that the genre has been given its own page on the Dariawiki! Check the stories out at the link.

There's still time to vote for the 2014 Daria Fanworks Awards! See the written and visual nominations and choose your favorites.

Fanfic Update!
  • ASPS, by PrecambrianStudios (part 80): "The door flew open suddenly. Wehrung and Michelle both jumped as Ethan, looking somewhat emaciated, strode in and immediately went over to Wehrung's computer. 'Bastard,' he sneered."

  • "Aw Mama...Can This Really Be The End?", by Scissors MacGillicutty (part 36): "Vitale interrupted the general counsel for the DPH. 'Stop right there, sport. "Situation?" That's what you're calling what's happening in Worcester?' Audio from the speakerphone was only adequate, but the contempt in Vitale's voice was plain to hear."

  • It Began with a Taste (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "It began with a taste, such a simple thing really. It wasn't even anything exotic, just a piece of chocolate. But there was something about it... Something unusual..."

  • The Many Doctors, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 32b): "Soon, the Doctor and Laranna returned to the console room. 'Ah, Vincent. You're here,' the Doctor said. 'Hi, Doctor,' Vincent said. 'Mandy here, says that Amy isn't here?' 'Yes... She's found the person she lost...'"

  • May I have a Cheeseburger?, by metameric1 (part 11): "Dearest Weevil, I am speechless. Well, not really."

  • Self-Esteem Class in Room 101 (Would Mr. O'Neill...), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): "'I realize how harsh and cruel the world may seem to be,' Timothy O'Neill said, addressing his self-esteem workshop. '"Seems, Mr. O'Neill? Nay, it is,' murmured Daria."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Ranma (COMPLETE!): "Scrick Scrick Scrick... 'nyan, nyaaaan' Scrick Scrick Scrick 'nyan, nyan.' 'What the hell is that' said Daria as she reached the bottom of the stairs."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): "'So this has all been Ms. Li's doing . . .for how many years?' Daria seethed. 'Three years.' Jane replied. 'Three wonderful years.'"

  • Unnamed story (Would Mr. O'Neill...), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Gina Plemmons, a dark-skinned girl with a sturdy build and long brown hair wearing a football jersey walked into Principal Li's office. 'Excuse me, Ms. Li,' she said in an affirmative tone."

  • What is War good for? (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by DarkDranzer (COMPLETE!): "Brittany: 'Um Mr. DeMartino?' Mr. DeMartino: 'What is it BRITTANY?' Brittany: (twirling her hair) 'I was thinking why do we need war to solve our problems with other countries?'"

Sunday, January 25, 2015

Today is NOT Opposite Day!

Daria and Quinn have switched outfits because today is Opposite Day, and everyone should not do and say the opposite of what they normally would. Also, Daria is overrated, fanfiction is for losers, and I hate chocolate.

Not only that, but on this day exactly one hundred years ago, the first transcontinental telephone call was made. This is a red-letter day for both Helen and Quinn, who would probably wither away and die without their phones.

Fandom News!

Friday, January 23, 2015

A Rare Glimpse of Bootless Feet

Daria's just checking her shoe size to make sure she's still a six and a half B because today is Measure Your Feet Day! Of course, as Quinn can tell you, if your shoes are too small you should wear them anyway if they make your legs look hot. Take that advice with as much salt as you require.

The 2014 Daria Fanworks Awards Written and Visual nominations are now posted, so go forth and vote for your favorites! Go here for more information.

Fanfic Update!
  • Damnation, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Then Daria woke up and discovered, to her vague annoyance, atheism had been wrong."

  • Daria's Dates (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Indigo (COMPLETE!): "At Lawndale High, Daria and Jane are standing in the hallway; Daria is telling Jane all about her date with Ted."

  • An Old, Dirty Shame (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Sam Griffin couldn't believe his luck, he and his brother had heard the whispered conversations for years but had had nothing solid to go on. At least until one fateful day when they found a residual check in the mail and had goggled the company name and hit pay dirt."

  • Slow Flows the River, by UU (part 1): "'The Shah didn't drink Ultra Cola at all.' 'He didn't?' Having finished her shredded chicken with lemon grass soup, Amy Barksdale tucked into a plate of giant prawns with enthusiasm."

  • We Are One, by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "'I think....' he and Ethan turned around and looked at the dressmaker's dummy in the corner of Gage's room. It was adorned with the initial version of the bright-red formal dress he had designed for the twins. 'I think this could be the start of something beautiful.'"

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Daria Doesn't Appreciate the Pervert Ones Who Stare at Her, Though

Those rats with fluffy tails want to remind everyone that today is Squirrel Appreciation Day, and that peanut butter is always welcome as a gift. I have no doubt Jake will be appreciating the little guys with extreme prejudice.

Today is also the anniversary of the original airing of Is It College Yet? in 2002, which also marked the end of the Daria series as a whole. "It's like the end of an era!"

Fandom News!

Monday, January 19, 2015

"Nothing says 'be mine' like a pounding heart beneath a floorboard."

Daria's enjoying a nice romance novel by Edgar Allan Poe, who was born on this day in 1809. One of Poe's other well-known works, "The Raven," has been referenced in Daria fanfic at least twice: The Cynic by Steve Mitchell and A Raven, Nothing More by Lew Richardson.

Fanfic Update!
  • ASPS, by PrecambrianStudios (part 79): "'These mixers always suck,' Vivian Deblasio moaned to her assigned partner, Hero Dressler, who felt very much like moaning herself."

  • ASPS 3, by PrecambrianStudios (part 4): "She pulled up a chair next to him and sat down in it, and stared hard at her brother's face. 'I know you're faking it,' she said. Ethan remained limp."

  • "Aw Mama...Can This Really Be The End?", by Scissors MacGillicutty (part 35): "Although none of his family appeared to be at home when he arrived there in the early afternoon, Bunk Moreland took all the care he usually would to creep into his house when everyone was there and asleep in the middle of the night."

  • The Many Doctors, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 32): "As soon as the the older Doctor and his companions (including Tamsin) had left the TARDIS, he set it in motion, leaving the Heights of Oranui behind. He turned to Laranna. 'I guess we should search for Felicia too. What do you think?'"

  • The Snoozeroom (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "In the front row, a girl in a field jacket raised her hand. 'Yes?' 'Hi. I have a question: are you from an alternate timeline?'"

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Start In The Middle of an Action Sequence), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): "Even as the manager of the Good Times Chinese Restaurant was yelling at Chris, a BTR-80A personnel carrier came roaring down Payson, but before it came to a halt, Snoop stood before it, drew her Glock 41, and fired two rounds at it."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "It was one of those scenes that required a world to be tinged with just a little extra insanity, one of those spots the Gods of Chaos had said 'meh' and dumped a little of their excess power on their way into work in the various Warhammer universes one day."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover XIII - Crossovers are Magic!), by Milo (COMPLETE!): "A flying car enters the Morgandorfer garage. At the same time, a newspaper boy throws the Lawndale Herald to the front door. Its headline reads 'Mutant Plague Averted'."

Saturday, January 17, 2015

But What Will the Electricity Do to His Eye?

Mr. DeMartino is apparently trying out a new career path in scientific experimentation in honor of Benjamin Franklin, who was born on this day in 1706. I'm not sure he's getting any better job satisfaction than he did as a teacher. Then again, it probably isn't a whole lot worse, either.

Fandom News!

Thursday, January 15, 2015

Cuchi Cuchi!

Helen is dressing a little differently for work in order to better emulate Charo, the singer who was born on this day in 1951. I'm sure Eric will be appreciative of the outfit, although I'm not sure how much the singing will help her win that big lawsuit. It probably doesn't matter, though--she won't get through the first verse before her cell phone interrupts the concert.

Today is your last chance to send in your nominations for the 2014 Daria Fanworks Awards. You've got until 11:59 PM (23:59) UTC, so don't wait any longer!

Fanfic Update!
  • ПОД СНЕГОМ, by Shad_Tkhom (COMPLETE!): "они брели согнувшись под ледяным, хлещущим снегом по лицу, ветром."

  • Virginian Sisters: Horse Riding, by Szcz (part 1): "Quinn Morgendorffer walked through the cold streets of New York. Somewhere in Greenwich Village, she found a small café and entered. Seated at a corner table, Tom Sloane said, 'Hello,' and asked, 'Coffee?'"

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

"Just close your eyes and imagine what you want."

Daria appears to be celebrating Make Your Dream Come True Day by fantasizing about Trent with a graying mullet. Never knew she was into that kind of thing, but there ya go. So, what's a dream that you'd like to see come true? Bonus points if it involves making family members suffer.

Fandom News!

Sunday, January 11, 2015

The Flighty Quinn

Quinn is prepped and ready to follow in aviation pioneer Amelia Earhart's footsteps by flying solo from Honolulu, Hawaii to Oakland, California. Earhart became the first person to successfully complete that flight on this day in 1935, so Quinn is (gasp!) years behind the fashions on this one.

Fanfic Update!
  • "Aw Mama...Can This Really Be The End?", by Scissors MacGillicutty (parts 33 and 34): "Jesse had been wondering through the condo complex calling the gardener's name for more than a half hour. He had never explored it before this morning." (Part 34)

  • A Boring Summer, by ST91 (part 5): "Dario had just put down the phone when he suffered an assault by his father. 'Ahahahah, well done son!' said Jake giving Dario a vigorous series of pats on the back. 'Ouch! Dad, stop!'"

  • DW: Doctor & Sarah 01: Deadly Assassin, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "Shortly after the TARDIS appeared in the museum the Doctor emerged. 'What a way to travel. But which way the Panopticon?' It had been a long time since the Doctor had left Gallifrey..."

  • The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (part 158): "The contingent of the Lax Bros made their way to the roof of The Excellence Club. It had been a long way to get there."

  • Sailor Jupiter Buries the Past (Tales of the Shadow Senshi), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "Makoto spun in place and smashed the side of her foot into Sailor Venus's face. Minako staggered back across the room, caught her balance before she fell, reached down to the sheath strapped to her thigh and pulled the long serrated knife from it."

  • To me, To you, by Bill Bruford (COMPLETE!): "Quinn walked by the same shop everyday and she always wondered what did it sale and why. It was a run down old place with a cracked window with no display, what could be sold here and why."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Start In The Middle of an Action Sequence), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "Glass shattered. Sandi Griffin of the House Griffin spun, cocking the hammer on the pistol in her hand. It was a weighty thing, and it was questionable if the bullets of a pistol could even hurt the intruder. Thunder roared, and Sandi jumped again, squeezing the trigger."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Anthony, I know that you're having a hard time accepting that Janet and I are getting married, but-' 'Shut - up.'"

Friday, January 9, 2015

Thou SHALT Not....

Mr. DeMartino seems to be full of godlike rage today, but luckily for Kevin it's only Play God Day--he doesn't really have any supernatural powers. Unless you count keeping his eye in its socket all this time as a supernatural power.

Jane, meanwhile, will be taking the opportunity to "make them crawl, I tell you. Crawl!" Then again, she probably does that pretty much every day.

Fandom News!

Thursday, January 8, 2015

Time to Nominate!

Just a quick reminder to send in nominations for the 2014 Daria Fanwords Awards. The deadline is January 15th!

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

He's Cruising the Information Superhighway!

Jake's thrilled because he just found out that today is International Programmers' Day. Of course, Jake is the furthest thing from a computer programmer you can get without including inanimate objects, but we'll let him enjoy his moment anyway.

Fanfic Update!
  • A Boring Summer, by ST91 (part 4): "That morning Dario was lying on the living room couch in a sort of semi-coma due to the heat. From the open windows not a breath of air came inside and the old fan was of no help too. This heat wave will be the death of me. If only I could find a documentary on Antarctica maybe I could survive until tonight."

  • Fall (Iron Chef: Start In The Middle of an Action Sequence), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "CRACK! Stacy had never heard the sound of someone's nose breaking in real life. Stacy was also positive that she'd never punched someone before."

  • Family Ties (Iron Chef - Characters haunted by their embarrassing pasts), by DarkDranzer (COMPLETE!): "'Hey Ant, you in the mood for a trip down memory lane?' Vinny DeMartino asked while waving an old sepia-toned photo. His younger cousin sighed as he packed another musty box, 'Not REALLY but I have the FEELING that you're going to DRAG me on one ANYWAY.'"

  • Fly (Iron Chef: Start In The Middle of an Action Sequence), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Quinn's eyes widened in slowly mounting horror, head tilted upward so that she was unintentionally looking down her nose at the apparition some twenty feet away."

  • In the midst of her nightly routine (Something Special), by Bill Bruford (COMPLETE!): "As the news ended and infomercials began, Stacy sat on the edge of her bed, brushing her hair."

  • In Vegas Without Any Logic or Reason, by DIsaac (parts 1 - 3): "Daria woke up, Mouth dry, hungover. She decided that celebrating her freedom from Raft in Vegas was in order." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Pages From a Notebook, by Strumwulf (part 13): "Daria woke to her alarm going off, and took stock of her situation."

  • Sisters and Friends, by metameric1 (part 24): "After a long moment, she sat back up and looked at him. 'Do I manipulate you?' He laughed. 'Like a ball of silly putty.' 'Please don't let me do that.'"

  • The Uniqe, by EntrancedCat (part 1): "Daria stumbled on the jagged reddish-brown scoria, thankful for her heavy black boots. For lengths of several hundred yards the trail had occasionally narrowed with sharp rocks in ankle-high chunks and sheets scraping against her black jeans and boots on both sides."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Start In The Middle of an Action Sequence), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Crunch. Chomp. Chomp. Chomp. Chew. That's important."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Start In The Middle of an Action Sequence), by TheTuxedo (COMPLETE!): "The sand underneath Trent's head was softer than any pillow. He half opened his eyes and saw the brilliant blue of the sky, dotted with fluffy white clouds. He grinned at his luck, waking up to a sky like this."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by GDTSP9 (COMPLETE!): "Kevin groggily opened his eyes, seeing a blurry, blue sky. After a few seconds, it wasn't so blurry. He felt like he had been tackled by an entire team of football players, five times in the last five minutes. As he slowly got to his feet, he realised he was covered in molasses."

Monday, January 5, 2015

Tweet, Tweet!

Helen has prepared a nice holiday dinner for Jake in honor of National Bird Day, and I suppose it's not actually that much worse than Jake's usual cooking. I just hope Quinn doesn't send any more canaries to their doom at the pet store.

Fandom News!

Saturday, January 3, 2015

Let's Hope the Rash Doesn't Come Back

Today is Humiliation Day, and judging by the way Daria's blushing I suspect she's participating. That, or Trent just walked by without a shirt on. Although that second one isn't as likely because today also happens to be Festival of Sleep Day and I seriously doubt Trent's going to pass that opportunity up.

Additionally, J.R.R. Tolkien was born on this day in 1892, and I know we've got quite a few Lord of the Rings fans out there. To celebrate, I got you a very lumpy candle that may or may not be a hobbit.

Remember to nominate for the 2014 Daria Fanworks Awards!

Fanfic Update!
  • ASPS, by PrecambrianStudios (part 78): "Hero Dressler sat on the roof of Warville, clutching at the scarf as she waited. Her overcoat did not help to keep out the biting chill of winter, and every so often a gust of icy wind would blow strands of her hair into her face, and frost would begin to accumulate on her glasses. She checked her watch again. Twenty minutes to midnight."

  • Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (COMPLETE!): "Since the day Aunt Amy decided that her student's 'magical muscles' need proper rest, Daria was bored out of her mind. The proven methods of dealing with boredom weren't working."

  • A Boring Summer, by ST91 (parts 2 and 3): "'So it's for this reason that in the past women couldn't have roles in plays.' said Dario to Brittany as they left the movie theater." (Part 3)

  • Calendar Boy (Iron Chef - Characters haunted by their embarrassing pasts), by Snow-Kitty (parts 1 and 2): "Daria looked up to see her friend Jane standing point blank beside her locker. 'Um... are you okay Jane?' she said with trepidation, confused by the underlying bewilderment in her friend's eyes." (Part 2)

  • Daria Joins The Sweet Cake Girls, by peapotmaster (part 1): "Daria sat down on her computer to watch the latest web episode of her favorite show, Sick, Sad World."

  • Forced Impression, by Indigo (part 5): "Quinn waited until the boys had driven away before indulging in her new pastime of gently teasing her sister about boys. 'Well I think one date with Joey will do for now. So Daria, you did it, movie, burger and backseat with a boy. Did you like the kissing?'"

  • A Little Exercise (Iron Chef: Start In The Middle of an Action Sequence), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Daria gasped as she counted the oncoming, gore-caked beasts, blood-flecked foam and pus flying from their mouths like pinkish-white steam trails: Ten... fourteen... twenty... twenty-three... Jesus, who let all the dogs out?"

  • Mine Origins, by Vukodlak (part 7): "After her morning shower Daria stared in the mirror and debating on going back to bed or getting dressed and heading downstairs. On one had she was really hungry on the other hand it was her birthday and she worried what her family was going to do to try and lift her spirits."

  • Outclassed, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): " Sandi crossed her arms. 'This isn't about escaping the class anymore. This is about taking down Mr. O'Neill. Not just as revenge, but as a public service to the school. If we're successful, no one--or at least not as many people--will care about us being put in the class in the first place. We'll be the people who defeated the worst teacher Lawndale High has ever had.'"

  • Padding after dark (Something Special), by Bill Bruford (COMPLETE!): "Drip... Drip... Drip... 'Sam you idiot, why can't you turn off the sink.' Sandi said, eyes wide open taking in the moonlight."

  • Quinn's Code 11: The Geek Hunter, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "'Right, we have Sandi and Tori to deal with,' Quinn said. 'Go ahead!' Stacy said. 'Are you sure?' Quinn asked. 'Yes!'"

  • Unnamed story ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "'Gotta get away from the bears! Gotta get away from the bears!' The words spilled out with each pant as Daria raced across the featureless plain. Sneaking a look behind her, she saw that the bears were still gaining, the massive brown in the lead roaring ferociously."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'You know, Daria - this really isn't that bad.' 'Of course you'd think that - now, you have a reason to be lazy all day!'"

Thursday, January 1, 2015

So Long, 2014!

You'll have to excuse Daria right now. She's still exhausted from staying up late and partying for New Year's Eve. On her behalf, I'll wish everyone a happy new year! I hope 2015 is a great year for you all, and I also hope that you kept your New Year's resolutions realistic.

For those of you out there who are not hungover, here are a few New Year's-themed fanfics to enjoy:

Fandom News!

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Uh...Fore! Yeah.

Jesse's playing a round of golf in honor of Tiger Woods, who was born on this day in 1975. I'm sure he'll be joined shortly by Jake, who loves to play golf but rarely gets the opportunity, and Jodie, who's been forced to take golf lessons by her parents for reasons too stupid to get into right now.

We're nearing the end of the year, and that means it's time to start thinking about nominations for the 2014 Daria Fanworks Awards! Read the rules and discuss written and visual works in the threads.

Fanfic Update!
  • Ah, Hell, by metameric1 (part 25): "Daria brushed a lock of hair out of his face as he lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He'd picked that up from her, something that she did as long as she could remember when she needed to figure something out and hadn't yet gathered up the energy to actually get up and face the world."

  • "Aw Mama...Can This Really Be The End?", by Scissors MacGillicutty (part 32): "Little Natasha Larimer could hardly fit both her hands around the grip of the Glock G20 in her Hello Kitty backpack but once her hands were on it, she could draw, aim, and shoot it with speed and accuracy."

  • A Considerable Amount Of Paperwork, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Quinn looked up from the inches-deep pile of papers next to her. 'Does anyone have an extra-fine point market that I could borrow?'"

  • The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (part 157): "The woman didn't look that much older than him. 'You're Tom Sloane?' 'Yup. You are - ?' 'You don't need to know. Get in. Show me where you're parked.' Tom tilted his head. 'This isn't a kidnapping, is it?' 'You wish.'"

  • Just trying to read Waif, by Bill Bruford (COMPLETE!): "Legs crossed, elegantly reclined on the living room couch. No sounds were being made except for the page turning every now and then."

  • Outclassed, by Kristen Bealer (part 2): "She was expecting geeks and misfits. She was expecting complete and total lameness. She was expecting tedious boredom. She did not expect to see Stacy Rowe staring back at her."

  • Sisters and Friends, by metameric1 (part 23): "'Have you found any possible digs for you and Annie?' Daria pulled the pizza out of the oven, setting it down on the top of the stove to cool a little. 'You're kinda cutting things close.'"

  • Sitting on the Sidelines, by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "When Evan was a baby, his father Andrew's fondest wish was for him to be a football player."

  • Star Trek: Daria - Resurrection, by echopapa (COMPLETE!): "'Yep, typical Jane,' Daria said aloud. 'Here I am in the 24th Century, and I can have everything I ever dreamed. The only thing I can't have is you.' The door chime brought her back to reality, and she could hear her roommate in the next room talking to someone." (Part 17)

  • Star Trek: Emerging Enterprise, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Kazza put her hand on the scanner plate, and her house door opened. 'Welcome home Karen, you have zero messages from your contacts and 1 million messages in your bulk folder,' the computer said. Kazza knew what those million messages would be – spam."

  • Unnamed story ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "'Gah' Daria woke to a sudden ache in her abdomen and lower back."

  • Waking Up with That Weird Feeling ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "Daria woke up, Mouth dry, hungover. She decided that celebrating her freedom from Raft in Vegas was in order."

  • What Are Eyes The Window to, When The Soul Seems to Have Departed? ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by 45Ranger (COMPLETE!): "Daria's eyelids snapped open. Her eyes, however, saw nothing."

Sunday, December 28, 2014

You Wouldn't Like Him When He's Angry...Or Any Other Time, Really

O'Neill is hulking out in order to wish comic book writer Stan Lee a happy 92nd birthday. Well, he's sort of like the Hulk. Only not green. And not angry. And not smashing anything. But hey! Close enough, right?

This is also Card Playing Day, so if you've been wanting to set up a family card game, today's the day. Bridge? Gin? Hearts? Done!

Fandom News!

Friday, December 26, 2014

Sandi Had Better Watch Out

Someone needs to pull Stacy aside and let her know that although today is Boxing Day, it really doesn't have anything to do with the combat sport. Looking at her expression, though, you might want to wait until she changes out of her fighting gear.

In less violent news, today is also the first day of Kwanzaa. Apparently the Gupty family celebrates this holiday, considering they have the book "Kaneesha's First Kwanzaa" in their library. There's a fanfic waiting to happen, I think.

Fanfic Update!
  • The Aftermath, by metameric1 (part 2): "'Jeez, now she's a total egghead!' The burst of laughter followed Daria down the hall. Some of the people nearby glanced at her, some smirking, but most shared a dark look as they ever so slightly tightened ranks around the smaller teen."

  • "Aw Mama...Can This Really Be The End?", by Scissors MacGillicutty (part 31): "'Detective, please hold for Special Agent Sydnor.' —it's still morning and you're still listening to Mental in the Morning with Bing and the Spatula Man!"

  • The Blackout Menace ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by baelparagon (COMPLETE!): "For the majority of people in life waking up in a strange environment with no idea how they got there would have caused a momentary panic response. For Daria however this was beginning to become a rather unfortunate circumstance"

  • A Crystal Tokyo Nursery Rhyme (Tales of the Shadow Senshi: Rise of the Shadows), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "Rest my child, it's time for bed Time to lay your weary head If awake you try to stay The Shadow Senshi come to play"

  • Daria: College Pains The Sophomore Year, by James the Lesser (part 1): "Lindy sits at the Morgendorrfer home with Little Jake on her lap. 'Your momma is going to be home soon. I hope with good news.'"

  • Dear Daria, by Anonymous (COMPLETE!): "Dear Daria, That's a silly slip. But I told Wren I was writing to my sister, so I suppose that makes it truer than if I was just writing in a journal. And it's not like you'll ever see this or anything."

  • The First Time ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by Indigo (COMPLETE!): "Daria woke earlier than usual that morning. She had wondered what this moment might be like for her ever since she had been old enough to wonder about such things."

  • Last Day (Re: 'Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Daria rubbed her eyes, and groaned as she took in the far-too-bright beam of reddish-orange sunlight and the sound of her mother's piercing, incoherent shrieks."

  • The Morning Aftermath ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by 45Ranger (COMPLETE!): "Daria opened her eyes and quickly sat up in the bed, too quickly judging by the pain in her head. Speaking of pain it was made even worse by what she would swear were explosions going off in her room."

  • Neg Active (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Chuck had been doing it wrong for a while but he knew the real deal now. To get the girls, he needed to be a challenge. He needed to show his superior genes. Just like Alpha V said, he had to bring those 9's down a peg and show he had social capital and then they'd be his. He might even get to... (his mouth went dry) ...kiss a girl."

  • Nuclear Fallout of My Winter Heart, by Anonymous (COMPLETE!): "Jane opens the door to the student services building, and it's still bone-chill cold inside, but at least there's no wind. They check a laminated map to find the office for Raft Roundtable. 'This is all your fault, you know,' Daria tells her, tugging down her scarf to speak."

  •, by Anonymous (COMPLETE!): "What the hell was Jane up so early on a Sunday for? The situation being rare enough, Daria sighed and answered. 'Hello?' 'Daria! Did you see my email? Did you hear the news?'"

  • Star Trek: Daria - Resurrection, by echopapa (part 15): "'Got any basic training stories you'd like to share with the readers?' Jake asked. 'Do you want me to tell you tales about how all of us underclassmen had to muster on the parade ground at 0500 while we were berated and chewed out by a Drill Sergeant from Hell? And then we were made to do PT and run laps until we threw up? Sorry to disappoint you, but none of that happened.'"

  • Unnamed story ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "Daria was, understandably, livid about having woken up in the middle of her best friend's dorm room devoid of both her glasses and her shoes. Any memory she had of the previous afternoon was fuzzy and there was no doubt in her mind that Jane was wholly responsible."

  • Unnamed story ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Ugh, my head...' Daria moaned as she crawled out of bed, on reflex she grabbed the bottle of bourbon on her nightstand and took a swig."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Neuropathology of the Fashion Club), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Oh Quinn!" Stacy said, "I'm glad that we're getting to be real friends. Best friends! Closer-than-best-friends!'"

Thursday, December 25, 2014

Anyone Got Any House-Shaped Food?

Merry Christmas, everyone! Er, I mean, X, short for X-mas. Whatever you call it, I hope you all have a great day either surrounded by loved ones or alone with a TV dinner. Whichever way you choose, here's a humongous list of holiday fanfic to enjoy!