Thursday, April 30, 2020

Mack Daddy Blows It


Mack's giving it all he's got for International Jazz Day, but he'd better take a breath before he passes out. I don't recall a lot of jazz references on the show, but I could definitely see a few of the characters as fans. Who on Daria do you think would be a jazz aficionado?

It was also on this day in 1803 that Thomas Jefferson signed the Louisiana Purchase. This nearly doubled the size of the country and was a big factor in the doctrine of Manifest Destiny. If you don't know what Manifest Destiny is, just ask Daria. She'll concisely and unemotionally sum it up for you!

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Tuesday, April 28, 2020

Staaaaaar Light, Staaaaaar Bright....


Tiffany's doing a little stargazing for International Astronomy Day! Knowing Tiffany, she's probably spending less time looking for Sirius and Proxima Centauri and more time seeking Kim Kardashian and Taylor Swift.

Today is also Great Poetry Reading Day, so if you'll wait just a minute Andrea and Quinn will be here to recite some of their favorite classics about rotting flesh and greasy fries. Hey, where are you going?

Fanfic Update!
  • Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 37): "The following day passed quite normally ... at least until lunchtime. Daniel, as usual, sat alone, eating his food in relative tranquility. At some point, however, a strange thing happened; he heard a female voice calling him."

  • Daria of Morsang-sur-Orge, by Rémi (parts 16 - 18): "Jeanne : Admit it, Trente : we’re lost. The night was falling, and they were still in the middle of the forest, whith no visible road or path to follow." (Part 17) (Part 18)

  • Nauseating Prize, by Lady Evil (part 2): "Tom stood on the Landons’ doorstep with a bouquet of white roses, mayflowers and anthurium. He worried for a minute if a gift of white flowers would be taken the wrong way."

  • Unnamed story (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Tom looked at the strange box. It was a small puzzle box that Jane has given him in order to show that there were no hard feelings."

Sunday, April 26, 2020

We Always Knew She Was Twisted


Although Ms. Li is clearly taking National Pretzel Day too far, I'm not going to even try to correct her. You see, in order to do that I'd have to have my eyes open and I am not about to look at that.

Today is also Hug an Australian Day, but in light of current events I'm going to go with a polite nod in the general direction of our Daria fans from Australia.

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Friday, April 24, 2020

It's the Fascist Club


I think the Fashion Club might have misunderstood the point of Fashion Revolution Day, but I'm not about to tell them. Not when they're armed, anyway.

Since this is also World Day for Laboratory Animals, we should spare a thought for the poor mouse from "The Lab Brat," whom fandom has named Roger. I sure hope that traumatized little guy found a good home. Preferably one without young, sadistic boys in it.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria of Morsang-sur-Orge, by Rémi (parts 14 and 15): "Daria (deadpan) : The famous thermal baths of Aachen, build by King Charlemagne with the techniques and lore of antiquity. I was told it was a marvel worthy of the Romans of old, and that I should see it with my own eyes. Well, about the « seeing » part, I’ve a slight problem..." (Part 15)

  • Daria: Spin the Bottle, by Meester_Lee (part 1): "Daria looked at the novel she was reading and scowled. It was a Nineteenth-Century classic that she’d probably have thrown at her in some future college-level English Literature class."

  • Daria: Winter Is Coming, by Meester_Lee (part 16): "Daria was not a morning person, and when she finally rose, she not only saw that there weren’t any clean and dry towels left in the upstairs bathroom, but that there wasn’t much hot water left, either."

  • The Death of Tom Sloane (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by OzFerret (COMPLETE!): "The doctor sat at the large mahogany desk that dominated his office. There were the obligatory degrees and certificates decorating the wall and the usual Medical book case of the usual medical books, but it was the desk that drew ones attention."

  • Nauseating Prize, by Lady Evil (part 1): "'OK, Tom, here’s the deal.' said Jane. She took the box of chocolates and take out bag from his hands. 'I get dinner, you get lost!' She slammed the door in his face."

  • Raw Deal (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by Lady Evil (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, Butt-Head!' said Beavis. 'I'm glad we quit our jobs at Burger World!'"

  • Worth the Trip, by Zetor (part 3): "Daria eyed her niece with a measure of respect as the girl wolfed down chili fries at what a more responsible adult might consider an unhealthy pace."

Wednesday, April 22, 2020

Kant Keep His Eyes Open


Poor Tom just doesn't find Immanuel Kant, born on this day in 1724, to be very exciting reading. Of course, everyone knows that "Critique of the Power of Judgment" is the real page-turner.

I would wish Marianne a happy Administrative Professionals Day, but she's far too busy to stop and listen. I'm sure Helen will ask her to send herself a nice flower arrangement, though.

Fandom News!

Monday, April 20, 2020

Cough, Cough!


I think it goes without saying that Trent is aware that today is 4/20. Don't try to tell me that his cough is hay fever. Although, come to think of it, I hope that cough isn't anything else, either!

Today is also Volunteer Recognition Day, so let's take a minute to thank all of those people who give their time to help others. Even if Ms. Li isn't forcing them to do it.

Fanfic Update!
  • Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 36): "'Well, this was surely an intense school council's meeting. I didn't expect it to be so crowded. ' Daniel said when, after almost two hours, he and Jodie left the classroom."

  • Daria: Winter Is Coming, by Meester_Lee (part 15): "Daria spent the early afternoon in the living room, despite her strong desire to retreat upstairs."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 37): "Erin realised she had been asleep when a bump woke her."

  • Lucky, it's Past, by Lady Evil (part 5): "Daria looked around at the interior of Phineas T. Firefly, the restaurant Trent had brought her to."

  • Silver Linings (Iron Chef: QUARANTINE!), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "Daria slowly panned the web camera over her tools before bringing the focus back to her face. Tom smiled at her over the marvel which was the internet."

  • Sitting at Home (Iron Chef: QUARANTINE!), by JPAGC (part 2): "'Hello, Dad?' 'Hey, Kiddo!' Jake Morgendorffer's voice came loud and cheerful through the phone. 'How are you?'"

  • Unnamed story (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by Lady Evil (part 2): "'...Fifty-two bottles of blue milk on da wall!' it continued to sing. 'Fifty-two bottles of blue milk!'"

Saturday, April 18, 2020

Setting a New Record


Daria and Jane would be enjoying Record Store Day an awful lot more if Upchuck wasn't participating. They'd probably be happier if he at least took his hand out of his pocket.

This also happens to be Newspaper Columnists Day, so take your pick between Future Daria's "preaching to the converted" column of outrage or the Ask Brittany advice column. Decisions, decisions.

Fandom News!

Thursday, April 16, 2020

The (Not-So) Great Educator


Mr. O'Neill's hoping that if he dresses as Charlie Chaplin on the comedian's birthday, then maybe it will feel like his students are laughing with him, not at him. (Spoiler alert: they're not laughing with him.)

Today is also National Stress Awareness Day, so be sure to tell Jake that you're aware of his stress. "Stressed? Why do people keep telling me I'm stressed? If I weren't stressed, I'd get stressed by everyone telling me I'm stressed!"

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria of Morsang-sur-Orge, by Rémi (part 13): "Roland took seriously his promise of helping Daria to study, as he apparently took seriously any duty he accepted. In fact, « serious » and « dutiful » were the two words coming to Daria’s mind when she thought about the paladin."

  • Farewell, by browneyedbagel (COMPLETE!): "'I’ve been told that art is subjective. You can hang a painting on a wall for fifty people to look at, and it’s very reasonable to assume that there will be fifty different points of view about the significance of the art.'"

  • Unnamed story (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by Lady Evil (part 1): "Tom Sloane woke to a feeling of blood rushing to his head. 'Where am I?' he groaned."

Tuesday, April 14, 2020

She's Probably a Lot Smarter Now


Brittany has traded in her pom-poms for flippers in honor of National Dolphin Day, but I notice she kept the ponytails. Kevin's in for a big surprise on their next date.

Today is also Ex Spouse Day, but don't tell Ms. Barch. Unless you want to hear a long rant about lazy good-for-nothing layabouts.

Finally, today is the anniversary of both "The Lab Brat" in 1997 and "Of Human Bonding" in 2000. Speaking of bonding, I still wish there were more scenes in the show of Jake and Kevin together. That's a friendship that should have been explored!

Fandom News!

Sunday, April 12, 2020

Have an Eggs-celent Easter!


Joey's just making a big batch of Easter eggs for everyone, but I think I'll pass. I'll gladly accept any chocolate bunnies you have to offer, though!

Today is also Big Wind Day, but unfortunately Wind Lane only qualifies as a medium-sized Wind at best. However, the big, wet rainstorm would certainly count.

Fanfic Update!
  • Betrayal (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "Sir Kevin Thomson and Her Ladyship Jodie Landon dragged a barely conscious Thomas Angier Sloane into the great hall where he was roughly thrown to the ground before his wife Princess Daria Morgandorffer Sloane."

  • College Disorientation, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'Okay, this is an informational sheet Push Comes to Love sends around to 600 leading colleges. It's called "My Personal Goals and Aspirations,"' the instructor told the college prep class."

  • Daria of Morsang-sur-Orge, by Rémi (parts 9 - 12): "A week before Pentecost, Jacques of Morsang-sur-Orge was seen journeying on the road toward Aachen, with his company of servants, squires and knights." (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12)

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 31): "Gradually, life at Hogwarts began to acquire a rhythm. Herbology on Monday followed by electives and study hall, Charms and Transfiguration on Tuesday, Defense Against the Dark Arts on Wednesday followed by flying lessons in the afternoon, and the dreaded Potions class on Thursdays."

  • The Definition of Mercy (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "Sweat runs down his face. The air is running out. Or rather, the breathable air is running out."

  • Edicius, by elainefr (part 27): "'Hey.' 'Hey.' They smiled at each other. He held out a small bouquet of flowers to her. She registered clear surprise and took them."

  • Lucky, it's Past, by Lady Evil (parts 3 and 4): "'OK, all you rockin’ rugrats!' Vixx Vinyl said into the microphone." (Part 4)

  • Midwife Crisis (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn had just been run over by an 18-wheel tractor trailer. She'd seen it coming but, rather than get to safety herself, she shoved Jim out of the trucks way." (Part 4) (Part 5)

Friday, April 10, 2020

Fore!


Jake's not going to let a little darkness or a wedding-related family crisis get in the way of his game on Golfer's Day! Jodie might join him, too, but not voluntarily. (Does she do anything voluntarily?)

Today is also National Siblings Day, so this would be a good day to call your sibling-if you have one--and gloat about that Hawaiian vacation or argue about which one was Mother's favorite. Yes, Quinn, "cousins" count as well.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, April 8, 2020

Who's Going to Draw Chiquito?


Jane is clearly enjoying Draw a Picture of a Bird Day, which is about the most specific holiday I've ever seen. There's no way I can do nearly as good a job as she did, but I suppose I'll give it a try. It'll look like a bird if you tilt your head and squint and have never seen an actual bird before!

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria: In Another World?, by starwater09 (part 6): "Daria was currently walking through the Lawndale Mall with Jane who was in search of some much needed clay for an art contest that would be taking place a few months later when she noticed Brittany Taylor walking out of 'Gimme Some Skin' with none other than Robert Johnson."

  • Daria of Morsang-sur-Orge, by Rémi (parts 5 - 8): "Quentine was finishing to compose a bouquet of flowers for their mother, when three young men, mounted on beautiful palfreys, came riding by." (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8)

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 30): "Daria’s thought upon awakening on her second Sunday at Hogwarts was that it looked to be a repeat of the day before, howbeit with a chance of rain and probably without a picnic. She didn’t have classes, she did have schoolwork, and she wanted to catch up on her reading."

  • It's Only A Pandemic!, by DIsaac (part 4): "(Chipmunk is in the office when she gets an email from Corporate!) CHIPMUNK: Jodie, Come quick. We have an email on high."

  • Lawndales future elite, by rvgonzal (part 6): "Monique glared at Trent and then choked out 'Yea, continue...' 'I think we'd better start again. Trent, repeat after me. I, Trent...' continued the minister."

  • Lucky, it's Past, by Lady Evil (part 2): "'I wonder what they put in these school hamburgers.' Jane mused at lunch. 'Whoever lost the Kentucky Derby, probably.' Daria guessed."

  • Midwife Crisis (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "Quinn was in the home office talking on the phone. 'What do you mean you can't watch the kids!? We've been planning this for weeks!'" (Part 2)

  • Necessities, by EntrancedCat (part 2): "Quinn held Jim’s arm as they emerged from PayDay to keep him from overly exalting about snatching the last two-thousand count box of sanitizing wipes and the last twelve-hundred count jug of vitamin C gummies."

Monday, April 6, 2020

At Least He Isn't Playing Bagpipes


Mr. O'Neill is prepared for Tartan Day, but there are at least three things wrong with this image.

1. "O'Neill" is an Irish name, not Scottish
2. There's no way Mr. O'Neill could lift that claymore, let alone wield it
3. WHY THE HELL IS HE NOT WEARING A SHIRT?!

Ahem. To all Scottish (or Scottish-descended) fans, wear those plaids with pride!

Fandom News!

Saturday, April 4, 2020

Squeak!


Everyone make sure your rats are well-medicated for World Rat Day! If not, they might not be able to solve the maze Daria and Kevin (ha!) worked so hard on.

Today is also Tell a Lie Day, so here's a doozy for you: Daria and Trent make the perfect couple and belong together forever!

Ugh. Now I just feel dirty. The bad kind of dirty.

Fanfic Update!
  • Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 19): "Standing in line to the locally owned, Playhouse 99 movie theater, Jennifer stared at Daria in shock. 'Let me get this straight, he wanted you to watch her spawning?'"

  • Daria of Morsang-sur-Orge, by Rémi (parts 2 - 4): "The sisters were greated in the dungeon hall by their family. Their two brothers, Hugues and Arnaud, were already sitted at table and eating their breakfast with an hearty appetite. Hugues had an amused smile on his lips." (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • It's Only A Pandemic!, by DIsaac (part 3): "(Kevin is doing what he does every night, watching all the games he can while he works his show. He is reading about The Blue Jackets being the first team to play without fans after The Governor there banned crowds of less than 100 people. Also that same day The NCAA announced that the March Madness Men's and Women's Tournament would be played without fans. That was going to be the topic until...)"

  • Lucky, it's Past, by Lady Evil (part 1): "Life would change forever for Ms. Li that Monday afternoon."

  • Seriously!? (Iron Chef: QUARANTINE!), by Vukodlak (part 1): "The anticipation was now over it had been announced that starting Monday, Lawndale would be on lockdown. So where ever you wanted to shelter-in-place you were to be there by then."

Thursday, April 2, 2020

Don't Let Those Peanuts Hijack Your Brain!


Okay, I do not recommend that Daria and Jane proceed with their planned celebration of National Peanut Butter and Jelly Day! Nothing good will result, I promise.

However, they should go right ahead and observe International Children's Book Day, especially if Daria still has her copy of Black Beauty. Jane might enjoy looking at (and critiquing) the illustrations instead.

Speaking of artwork, the episode "Art Burn" aired on this day in 2001. Jane experienced a major case of burnout, Trent had to suffer the trial of (ugh) real work, and Brittany never did find out what happened to that three-legged elephant.

Fandom News!