Saturday, December 31, 2011

Get Ready for the Countdown!


It's New Year's Eve! (Or for some of you in fandom by now, New Year's Day!) Are you ready to watch the ball drop? Or are you planning to be mostly incoherent by that point, taking a cue from Jesse over there? Or you could observe the day with a couple of New Year's Daria fanfics, Nemo Blank's The Mighty Quinn and Disco316's When the Ball Dropped.

However you plan to celebrate, stay safe and have an awesome 2012!

Fandom News!

Friday, December 30, 2011

Brrrrr!




In honor of the cold winter weather (at least in the Northern hemisphere), here's a very chilly caption contest for everyone!

Remember the drill--post your captions in the comments!

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Go Fish!


Happy Card Playing Day! Why not celebrate by playing a family card game like we (never) used to?

Today is also the birthday of comic book writer and co-creator Stan Lee, born in 1922 and still a True Believer! There have been tons of comic book crossovers in Daria fandom, Marvel and otherwise. Rather than having me list them all out here (and have I mentioned I'm lazy?), how about you post your favorites in the comments?

Meanwhile, I'll update everyone on the latest fanfic!

  • The Author as a Lesbian, Season 4, by DeacBlue (part 5): "Sandi nudged Tiffany, who appeared to drop something next to Quinn. She got down from her seat and picked it up, dropping a lit firecracker in Quinn's shoe. It went off, just as Tiffany took her seat again, and if Quinn had been looking, she would have seen Sandi switching one of her beakers."

  • Be Careful What You Wish For, by Doggieboy (part 5): "Suddenly the TV set turned on and the image of a puppet appeared on the screen. 'I see you’re both awake,' the puppet said. 'Let’s play a game.' 'Oh, crap,' John said as his face went pale. 'What’s wrong?' Jenny asked, her voice quivering. 'I don’t understand what he means by "playing a game".' 'Unfortunately, I do,' he said." (SFMB)

  • Chaos Theory: The Esteem of the Cynic and the Eccentric, by Walter Kovacs (parts 0 and 1): "'Haruhi? What do you think?' asked Helen as she scowled at Haruhi. In a cheerful tone Haruhi piped up with 'It was cool being interviewed by sick, sad world about uranium in the drinking water! I even got a free sick sad world DVD set out of it' Jake just sighed and shook his head after hearing Haruhi's response. 'No, kiddo about the move' asked Jake who was regretting asking Haruhi." (Part 1)

  • Daria - Double Down, by neonhomer (parts 14 and 15): "Daria got up and walked up the stairs, and into her room, closing the door behind her. She slipped out of her clothes of the day, and put on a night shirt. She then turned the light off, laid down in bed, put her glasses on the table beside the bed, and closed her eyes. When she did, all she could see was an image of Quinn, laying on the ground, with Sandi standing over her. She snapped her eyes open." (Part 15)

  • Daria is Victorious (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Attention, all students!' Ms. Li said. 'As the principal of such talented students, it is my great pleasure to announce that several of our students have been offered the opportunity to apply for a one-year term studying at the acclaimed Grove Hills Conservatory of the Arts!' 'Oh, no,' Daria sighed, looking up from her coffee. 'This could suck.'"

  • Daria Of Kleenex (Iron Chef: What's behind Alter Egos?), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "'I'm Zhengdong, he's Sameer. We're friends of your father, but that's not important right now. We need to get you someplace safe before-' Zhengdong was interrupted as the window of the dorm, and a large part of the wall, was staved in by some invisible force. '-That. RUN!!!'"

  • Daria/Power Rangers: Watching the Watchmen, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Geez, he seemed so nice when he started yesterday,' said Rose. 'Bad day?' 'Started?' asked Daria. 'That’s Tommy, the new kid. Didn’t you notice? Wait, forgot who I was talking to.'" (Part 9) (Part 10)

  • Dear Judith, by DeacBlue (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked over to see what could be a carbon copy of herself, but wearing a black catsuit and a long red cloak. 'Well, I often wear green jackets, but I don't think that I've been "snot-nosed," since we all were. I might try red and black though - if Jane doesn't give me trouble for horning in on her "look." What's your name?'"

  • A Johnny X X-Mas Special, by peapotmaster (parts 1 and 2): "'What’s up, Johnny?' the dog spoke. 'Are you pondering what I’m pondering?' Johnny asked the talking dog. 'Yes, and stop with the Pinky and The Brain reference,' replied the dog." (Part 2)

  • Squandered Snowflakes, by Lord Yellowtail (COMPLETE!): "Because she was Amy Jones and she was freaking brilliant. She deserved better. She deserved recognition: crowds cheering because she had skirted the establishment and changed the world for the better and gotten freaking loaded while she did it. If she ever met anyone smart enough to invent a time machine, she’d do whatever it took to go back in time and push herself in front of a train. With my luck, Power Girl would show up to save me. Oh, God."

  • Unnamed story (just a little something...), by oni (parts 1 and 2): "'So have you watched MTV lately,' asked Jane with an amused grin. She had time off from her animatior job at Cartoon Network, so she decided to spend christmas and the next few days off with Daria at her home in Boston." (Part 2)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Ms Morgendorffer? Did you get contact lenses?'"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "Kate looked at Jerome, and then to the array of steel tanks that were standing up in the bed of the pickup truck they had rented from Happy Herb's Rentals. Each tank was connected to an electronic valve that could be operated from the cab and had a nozel that was angled upwards and pointed backwards."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "(That Evening, at the Morgendorffer house - Helen, Daria, and Jake are at the kitchen table, playing a board game. It's Daria's turn.) Daria - Well, now, I am looking for someone to negotiate with. I have some bricks I can offer... Jake - I'll take them!"

  • Unnamed story (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "(Jake is riding in the Core Shuttle along with his daughters on the way to school; Quinn is to his right and Daria to the left) Jake - Girls, I just want you to know your mother and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new colony -- especially for you, Daria, right? Daria - Did we move?"

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Say, Kids! What Time Is It?


Happy birthday to the late Marlene Dietrich, who was born on this day in 1901. Ms. Barch's alter ego on the right is of the actress/singer, but I don't think she can pull off the look nearly as well as Dietrich did.

Today is also the anniversary of the 1947 debut of Howdy Doody, beloved children's show icon and oddly similar in appearance to Upchuck--or so Andrea thinks in "Fair Enough."

Fandom News!

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Ho, Ho, Ho!


Merry Christmas! "X" is feeling a little disgruntled at the lack of gingerbread cottages, but I hope the rest of you have an excellent holiday or, if you don't celebrate Christmas, an excellent day!

Helpful fan Charles RB has pointed out that Daria appeared in a Christmas issue of the Beavis and Butt-head comic book, where she tries--and fails--to teach the moronic duo the meaning of Christmas.

And if that isn't enough to get you in the holiday spirit, why not check out this list of Christmas-related Daria fanfics?


Saturday, December 24, 2011

...Not a Creature was Stirring, not Even an Economics Teacher!


It's Christmas Eve, everybody! Santa is loading up his sleigh with gifts for all the good boys and girls, and soon he'll be on his way, guided by his trusty reindeer...possibly including a fairly disturbing Mrs. Bennett, who is apparently into the furry subculture as well as the Fuzzy-Wuzzy Wee-Bits.

Fanfic Update!
  • A Considered Reaction, by DeacBlue (COMPLETE!): "'I liked it, too.' Daria glared at him. 'That's not funny!' 'I know.' 'Yeah, but you're the one who didn't have the brains to break up with Jane first, and there's this little uninvited trip here.' She opened the car door. 'Get out of the car.'"

  • Daria - Double Down, by neonhomer (part 13): "They turned a couple of corners, and came into a room. As they walked in, Quinn was laying on a hospital bed, with various wires and tubes connected to her. 'Oh my God, QUINN!' screamed Helen as she ran to her younger daughter’s bedside."

  • Daria/Power Rangers: Watching the Watchmen, by Charles RB (part 7): "'Um, guys?' Amelia, manning the monitors, sounded worried. 'We’ve lost the comms channels.' 'Reboot the equipment before panicking,' said Jodie. 'I did reboot it,' said Amelia. 'Hmm. Either the Power Rangers realised we were listening and changed their frequencies, or we have an equipment failure. Check we can pick up anything else?'"

  • Hard Choices (Reposted), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "I'm going to kill her. I'm not being euphemistic here. I am going to go over there, break into her house, and then I am going to kill Daria Morgendorffer."

  • My Idea Of How Dye! Dye! My Darling Should Have Ended (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Daria: I'm really sorry for everything, and I wouldn't blame you if you punched me right in the face-! Jane: Okay. (Jane punches Daria right in the nose)"

  • A QB Grows in Lawndale, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "At home that night, Kevin found that his mother had left to run some errands, leaving him and his father alone in the house together. He could hear the TV on in the living room. He took a deep breath and made his decision. I gotta do this. If I wait any longer, it'll never happen."

  • Quinn's Code 05: Morgendorffers vs. Amazon, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "'Yes, the geek may be interested in the contract! We have to like, be sure that she won't get it,' Sandi said. 'Remember what happened at the Mall of the Millennium, Sandi!' Tori said, referring to an incident two weeks before. Sandi glared at Tori. “Yes, I do, Tori. But I won't be talking to her.' 'How are you going to sabotage her chances?' Tori asked, wondering. Sandi developed a scheming look, and smirked. 'I will have to like, figure that out,' she said. Tori sighed."

  • Sloane, M.D., by InvisibleDan (COMPLETE!): "Cameron: We've started her on broad spectrum antibiotics but her fever isn't going away. Sloane: You start everyone on broad spectrum antibiotics and it never works. paces around the room How about some old world medicine? Bleed her with leeches. Maybe it will get the evil out. Foreman: Leeches? Sloane: Next step is drilling a hole in her head if I can't come up with something else. I'll be back later."

  • Thankful Snark (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'What's keeping Daria?' asked Tom. 'Well, last time we spoke, she said she was going to watch some of the old Muppet films. Heh, I wonder how she took all the heartwarming endings about-' The door burst open and Daria, her face split with a genuine smile, strode in singing...."

  • Trying Something New, by BrownEyedBagel: "She had everything she needed; she was determined to go forward with her plan. She spent the week working up the nerve to attempt it and refused to back out now. She was determined to jump into the plan head first."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by GlitterShrooms (COMPLETE!): "Daria: Is this thing on? Testing. 1. 2. 3. Testing. Great. Now after yet another damn year of extensive fan fiction, there is something I've come to realize. I Daria Morgendorffer, a.k.a. the Misery Chick, have a lot of love interests, and I mean a f**king lot."

Friday, December 23, 2011

A Holiday for the Rest of Us!


Happy Festivus, everybody! Celebrate by airing grievances, displaying feats of strength, and observing the traditional aluminum pole. Although I don't think you have to observe that last one the same way Upchuck is.

Today is also HumanLight, a holiday for secular Humanists. I don't think you need a pole for that one, so celebrate comfortably, Upchuck!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Some Day Her Paints Will Come....


Jane is looking especially happy (and out of character) because today is the anniversary of the premiere of the Disney film Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs in 1937. If Tom was freaked out by Jane's kiwi-flavored lip gloss, then this image would probably send him straight over the edge.

It was also on this day in 2002 that Karen and Derek held their wedding/vow renewal in Richard Lobinske's Falling Into College story "Christmas in White." Seems to have worked out for them so far, so congratulations to the happy couple.

Fanfic Update!
  • The Author as a Lesbian, Season 4, by DeacBlue (part 4): "Jen flipped her ponytail over her shoulder. 'We've been really clear on what she's done that she shouldn't. And we aren't talking about any of that stuff right away. But if she stays stupid, then yeah, she'll deserve what she gets, and we're going to give it to her. Nobody fucks with our family and walks away unbroken.' 'Okay,' Quinn said in a small voice. 'So can we do something to help Stacy?' 'I think that we can, though you'll need to take a step back,' said Daria. 'You see...'"

  • Camp Pu, by Smijey (part 3): "'I'm just...I'm just so scared, Daria, and you won't tell me anything, and I fell on my butt. Why did you smash up Mr. Potts' wall, Daria? You'll get in big trouble.' Daria sighed. 'Look, Amelia. I don't want to say anything until I know for sure what's going on. I have a lot of hints what's going on...and they scare the hell out of me...but I don't want to scare you or Quinn if it turns out I'm wrong. Okay?"'"

  • End of Innocence, by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "She knelt in front of the body to admire her work. The face was a horrid mess, even more gross than having an allergic reaction underneath too much blush that didn’t go with your eyes. His limbs were twisted in directions they had no business going in. The cold smile came back. He couldn’t hurt anyone anymore. Crowbars can do a lot of damage, especially if you used the pointy end."

  • Fallout Lawndale: 2289, by Vukodlak (part 2): "Daria sat tied to a parking post next to a dumpster in the raiders makeshift camp in back of the Goodtime Chinese Restaurant. At least they fixed her leg she mused looking at the bandages. Daria tried to keep her focus on her pain rather then her fear of what might happen to her. She’d been there for hours, it was already dark and there was no sign of Jane or anyone from home. Maybe they couldn’t find her; maybe they’d never find her or worse what if Jane didn’t make it."

  • I Wanna Take You For A Ride (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "'Get out of here, kid! I'll handle him!' Shouted a tall, wiry, gun-toting woman dressed in what appeared to be fetish gear. As Daria pulled back to the sidelines to tend to her wound the air was filled with the sound of gunfire."

  • John Lane 52: From the Last Step to the First, by RLobinske (part 2): "Curious, Jodie stood up from her seat and walked to the front of the room to wave her hand in front of the still figure of their science teacher, Ms. Barch. 'No response.' 'I think you broke her,' Mack said."

  • LLH Alternate Future - 09 - It Never Ends, by psychotol (COMPLETE!): "'Actually,” said Armalin as he entered the custody area followed by Callisto and Cybelle, “You know what you’re like, and are projecting it onto the feared other, all the mutants ever did was exist.' 'You’re a mutant too, aren’t you?' said the scientist. 'Yes I am, and I’m about to make your fears come to life.'" (Part 10)

  • A QB Grows in Lawndale, by Kristen Bealer (part 15): "Once all the orders had been filled and the kids ran off with sticky faces, Mack dropped his head in his hands and sighed. 'How the hell do you do it, man?' he asked. 'I've seen nothing but feral, demonic children since I started this job, but you walk up and suddenly they're practically human. What's your secret?'"

  • Quinn's Code 05: Morgendorffers vs. Amazon, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "'I probably shouldn't be telling you this, but we feel that Quinn is something quite special!' 'We think she's pretty special, too, but so is my other daughter, Daria. She hasn't got any extracurriculars.' 'Daria, but she is so plain!' 'That's my final offer,' Helen said. Then the phone was disconnected from the other end..."

  • Unnamed story (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by peapotmaster: "SUSAN: You must be Daria Morgendoffer of Lawndale? MARY: Our loser of a brother told up about you. DARIA: Is your brother named Johnny Quest...I mean Test?"

  • Unnamed story (IC: reading the newspaper at a wedding), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "'But, but, I'd just scored a contract with City Hall!' Jake choked out after Daria had mentioned the contents of the paper she was holding, having no desire to interact with her father's side of the family. Or any side, really."

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Happy Hanukkah!


Rabbi Trent reminds us all that Hanukkah begins today at sunset. May all those in fandom who celebrate it have a wonderful Festival of Lights! Trent actually stands a chance of being awake for this one, but let's hope he doesn't decide to write a song for the occasion.

Fandom News!

Sunday, December 18, 2011

"I baked these cookies for you!"


Happy Bake Cookies Day! Helen and Rita are getting into the spirit, just as long as the chocolate chips are already in the dough.

Incidentally, I could easily have actually tossed in that creepy framegrab of Daria with the plate of cookies from "Sealed With a Kick." Consider my forbearance to be an early Christmas gift to you all.

Fanfic Update!

  • All Points (Something I bashed out....), by neonhomer (part 4): "'Captain. I need these people of my sickbay. They are wreaking havoc down here.' 'I would assume you mean our guests.' Said Picard. 'Yes Captain. Her husband and younger sister will not leave her bedside. Captain Cullen is attempting to run the show down here. Captain Lane is doing her best to keep her at bay, so Dr. Pulaski and I can attend to Captain Morgendorffer.' Said Crusher."

  • The Author as a Lesbian, Season 4, by DeacBlue (part 3): "They were just coming out of English when the incident happened. Sandi had seen the three girls, and as they came together, knocked Tiffany into Jen. When both girls fell to the floor, she yelled, 'Fight! Fight!' until she saw Daria take a step close to her. Jane helped Jen up, then whispered into Jen's ear before they embraced. After several seconds, they pulled apart, just in time for the school security to show up. "

  • A Cautionary Tale (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "The car went silent. Sandi looked at Quinn with narrow, cold, eyes. 'Quinn Morgendorffer...are you insinuating that I am the kind of person who....breaks wind?' It was the kind of look that had destroyed freshmen and sophomores and cast them to the depths of unpopularity. It was the look of judge, jury and executioner. Even Quinn was afraid of THAT LOOK."

  • Daria and Jane are Forced to Save Xmas, by JohnnyStyle (COMPLETE!): "Guy Fawkes day had forgotten that the Immaculate Conception day, Saint Nick's day and a few others had booked the band for a party up on the ski slopes on the Island's single mountain. And that it was the very next day. He didn't want it to go back to how it was before. They needed to make it to that gig and for that they needed Xmas."

  • Daria - Double Down, by neonhomer (part 12): "'Hi Quinn.' Said Stacy, but the usual perkiness in her voice was gone. 'What’s wrong?' asked Quinn, as if she didn’t know the answer already. 'Come... inside... Quinn.' Said Tiffany. Quinn walked in the house, and Tiffany closed the door. They walked over and sat down on the couch. 'Sandi... is... planning... to... put... you... on.. a... fashion... sabbatical.'"

  • God Save The Esteem ep 38: Highland Lassie, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Soon after she left, a News 7 special report about a major disaster cut into the TV. 'Damn it, Beavis, change it back!' 'I didn’t do this!' protested Beavis, worried at the back of his mind that there must be some guy with a hook for a hand phoning from inside the house like in that thing. 'The situation here is positively apocalyptic! A freight train has derailed, causing a potentially TOXIC gas leak!' ('Huh huh huh') 'As a precaution, a twenty-block radius of North Highland is currently being evacuated!'"

  • Lawndale and Sandi Griffin’s Genie (Chapter 6), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "At the library, one of the middle school kids came up to Quinn. 'I think I have found something,' he said, as he held out a book. 'What is it?' Quinn asked, as she took the book. 'It’s a book of legends. My teacher says that all legends have a kernel of truth to them,' he said. Quinn thought. She remembered Mr. DeMartino and possibly at least one of her teachers back in Highland saying something similar. She looked at the cover. 'Selected Arabian Legends.'"

  • LLH Alternate Future - 09 - It Never Ends, by psychotol (parts 7 and 8): "Quinn could continue with this course of action, and it might make Kristi complacent, but Quinn also considered the need to find out what was really going on with Kristi, interrogations were all about psychological manipulation, and part of that was getting the subject to suspend disbelief, so this probably was not an interrogation as such. It could also be an attempt to brainwash Quinn, but forcing Quinn to live like a baby? ... ... There was plenty of junk science in the field of psychology. Quinn decided to go with her current plan, draw Kristi in, knock her out, steal the keys and get the Legion in. Although she would seriously want to find her clothes or ANY adult clothes before anyone gets here, because this was seriously wrong." (Part 8)

  • Maternity Surprise (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by lordscissorhand (COMPLETE!): "The Barksdale family always wound up in a Mexican standoff for this sort of thing. Everyone just waiting to shoot their mouth off at each other, hoping to mortally wound the others ego. This was exceedingly awkward for Jane, who still couldn't figure out why she was along for this ride. Rubbing it in was the fact that her father was there, but her mother wasn't. Although the landscape as she had been coming in was percolating some ideas."

  • A QB Grows in Lawndale, by Kristen Bealer (part 14): "Kevin tried to cross one strand of the lanyard over another and found himself holding a great big snarl instead. He tossed it onto the table and stood up. 'Mr. O.?' he asked. 'Yes, Kevin?' The teacher came over. 'I think that Kristin's right.' Before Mr. O'Neill could argue, he pushed forward. 'It really is hot, and this camp would be a lot more fun if the kids got to go outside and do stuff sometimes.' 'I appreciate your concern for the children," Mr. O'Neill said in that tone of voice, 'but it just isn't safe for them out there!' Kevin almost considered putting the man in a headlock."

  • Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "'...When the last roll of thunder diminishes off into the fading ozone, the dude will step out in a purple and white velour jumpsuit embroidered with the Philosopher's Union Logo and Sophos, the union mascot! Yes! And he'll also be wearing a weasel fur top hat with a propeller! And then...' 'Whoa, Jane! Stop! I'd still rather have someone on the order of Kierkegaard.'"

  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Pt.III), by jtranser: "'Have you ever woken up one morning, your brain enshrouded in a gray fog, and looked at your possessions and collections, all neatly catalogued and arranged and come to the conclusion you needed to get rid of them?'"

  • Tigresses of Lawndale (Reposted), by taishigi (parts 13 and 14): "Daria slid into one of the kitchen chairs. 'Hey,' she responded. 'Do you have some more music for me?' 'We do, but that's not why I needed to see you,' Trent said. His shoulders slumped. 'I hate to ask this, but we need a favor.' '"We" being the band?' Daria asked. She knew Trent would have been less shy if Jane needed something, while if the favor was merely for himself, he likely would not have even asked." (Part 14)

  • Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "The psychedelic vision Daria and Tom shared faded away as the shaft of magnetically contained plasma reduced Tom's body to atoms."

Saturday, December 17, 2011

The Fashionable Aviator


On this day in 1903, the Wright brothers made the first successful airplane flight in history. Quinn is ready for her take-off, but only if it doesn't mess up her hair, okay?

Today is also the beginning of the Saturnalia festival, so party on!

Fandom News!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Miami QB!


Happy 62nd birthday to Don Johnson, star of the 80's crime show Miami Vice and inspiration for Kevin's alter ego on the right. Note the lack of shoulder pads, too.

Today is also Bill of Rights Day, which commemorates the ratification of the Bill of Rights on this day in 1791. Celebrate by, um, not quartering soldiers in your house, I guess.

Fanfic Update!
  • All Points (Something I bashed out....), by neonhomer (part 3): "'Thank you Captain Picard. This is my brother Trent Lane, and Dar...errr, Captain Morgendorffer’s husband.' Jane motioned toward Trent, then to Quinn. 'I’m Commander Quinn Morgendorffer, Captain Morgendorffer’s sister.' 'I wasn’t aware that Daria was married.' Blurted Sheridan without thinking. Picard turned to face Sheridan, and was beginning to speak, but Trent cut him off. 'It’s a long story sir.' Said Trent."

  • Daria/Dorian Ch.16: Sugar High, by LadieT (part 2): "'You would think that with the hush money Ms. Li was given, we wouldn't be having these problems.' The reply was in Dorian's voice, but Quinn and Jane both knew who said it. 'Yeah, but knowing Ms. Li - she spent it on some piece of unnecessary and insane security equiptment. As if the Great Zombie Uprising would ever come here,' Jane smirked trying to cheer Dorian up. 'True, we are lacking their primary source of food. Speaking of food, maybe a little lunch will help me out. Nothing greasy though.' Dorian said."

  • Daria - Double Down, by neonhomer (part 11): "'I'm going senile.' Said Daria dryly. 'Wh-hy do you say that?' asked Quinn, looking at her herself in the mirror. Daria turned to Quinn, taking Quinn's hands into hers, and looking up into Quinn's eyes. 'Tell me I am not cracking up. Tell me I didn't just dream up the past four days.' 'You're not cracking up Daria, you didn't dream up the past four days.' Said Quinn, trying to match Daria's monotone voice."

  • Fallout Lawndale: 2289, by Vukodlak (part 1): "'Try not to blow us up' Jane was only half joking. These decaying engines from 2077 have a habit of exploding if you put enough bullets in them. 'Relax Jane so long as no one shoots the cells we'll be fine.' She pulled the first glowing cell out and put it into a lead lined case. 'These nuclear engines only explode from weapons fire never from simple impacts.' 'And yet your wearing a radiation suit' 'I didn't say this job was completely safe did I?' Jane couldn't see it but knew Daria was smirking."

  • God Save The Esteem ep 38: Highland Lassie, by Charles RB (part 3): "She’d prided herself on walking alone, ignoring the herd, and not caring to look back, and while she knew that meant she’d have no real ties to the old hometown, she’d never expected to want any. Returning to Highland for a bit was a sobering experience. It was only when Daria could see it and remember that she realised how little ties she had to the place, how few people would have been bothered she’d left. "

  • LLH Alternate Future - 09 - It Never Ends, by psychotol (parts 3 - 6): "As Daria and Jane emerged from the sewers at their initial ingress point, the sanitation worker asked them 'Whoa, what the fucking hell happened down there?' Jane looked at Daria, and Daria asked Jane 'What do you reckon? Walked into the stairs or fell down a door?' Jane's clipped tone spoke volumes as she responded 'Daria. ... I'm covered in faeces and bruises, and am SO not in the mood, right? ... Shut the hell up, and fly us home.'" (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)

  • A QB Grows in Lawndale, by Kristen Bealer (part 13): "When they arrived at the camp, Mr. O'Neill led everyone into the activity room for introductions. 'Greetings, and welcome to the Okay to Cry Corral,' he announced. 'I'm Uncle Timothy, and together, we're going to take a journey to the land of self-discovery. A land where it's okay to laugh, and it's okay...to cry.' Kevin hoped none of the kids were going to cry. He never knew what to do, and their faces got all goopy and gross."

  • Tigresses of Lawndale, by taishigi (part 12): "'I just got off the phone with them. I did ask them not to say anything, although I don't know if that will do any good or not. Tiffany also asked that I thank you and give you a hug.' 'Could you just say you did both?' Daria asked. 'I could, but . . . but I think I could use a hug,' Quinn admitted, a little teary. 'This has been scary, Daria.' Daria said nothing, she just lifted her right arm, and Quinn scooted over. Daria wrapped her good arm around Quinn's shoulder, and Quinn tucked her feet up on the sofa and laid her head on Daria's shoulder. Daria rested her head against Quinn's."

  • Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "Thomas Sloane blinked as he looked at the upright rectangular glass and metal box as it stood near the edge of the mesa. 'I know what that is,' he said. 'But what the hell is a telephone booth doing out in the middle of nowhere?'"

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Guilty Pleasures Redux), by ash_blackfire (COMPLETE!): "Daria couldn't keep her slight smile off of her face on her walk home from the CD store. As she passed Quinn's room she could hear her singing along with her music... Gwar in the same low gut grunting. 'She thinks she is here by her self.' Daria's smile got bigger ever so slightly. She would torment her later, she had more pressing matters on her mind."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "The camera focus on the door of a dressing room. Suddenly, the it opens and an orange-skinned, glassed- eyes muppet puts his head in. Scooter: twenty seconds to curtain! Mystik Spiral, twenty seconds to curtain!"

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Monkeying Around at a French Restaurant


Today is Monkey Day! Kevin will be happy to know this, considering his statement in "The Old and the Beautiful" that he likes monkeys--particularly Curious George. Apparently his mother isn't so much of a fan, though.

This is also National Bouillabaisse Day, which could be useful knowledge for anyone planning to dine at Chez Pierre tonight. That may include one or more of the three Js over there, but if they plan to dress as monkeys then I think Quinn will pass on that date.

Fandom News!

Monday, December 12, 2011

See You in the Funny Papers, Mr. D!


The Katzenjammer Kids, the longest-running comic strip ever, first debuted on this day in 1897. Mr. DeMartino is The Captain from the strip, presumably chasing after some students who couldn't tell him what year the War of 1812 began.

Fanfic Update!
  • All Points (Something I bashed out....), by neonhomer (part 1): "'Open a channel.' Said Daria. 'Open.' Said Davies. Daria straightened her uniform, but only out of habit. They couldn’t see her. 'Romulan vessel, this is the Federation starship USS Lawndale, Captain Daria Morgendorffer commanding. We are prepared to evacuate you and your crew to the Lawndale.'"

  • The Author as a Lesbian, Season 4, by DeacBlue (part 1): "'Oh, look,' sneered Sandi. 'It's the dyke and her artgeek girlfriend.' She put her finger to her lips and looked at the store that they had almost arrived at. 'Isn't she the girl that was so naive that she still believed in Santa Claus when she was twelve? and after that Christmas, painted all those ugly pictures of Santa Claus? and -' She was stopped by Daria's hand in front of her face."

  • The Cupboard, by Vukodlak (parts 1 and 2): "It turns out there was a Zon in afterlife but to get past the Bouncer you had to tell him an interesting story about how you died or be a hardcore punk but they tend to have interesting deaths anyway. Three new arrivals in the afterlife are trying to get inside." (Part 2)

  • Deck The Halls (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Daria!' Brittany shouted from the bedroom. 'Huh?' Daria was working on her reading for her graduate English seminar. 'We have to go downtown and buy a Christmas tree!' 'We do?' Daria said, not looking up. 'Did some horrible federal law get passed?'"

  • John Lane 52: From the Last Step to the First, by RLobinske (part 1): "Daria said, 'I know it is almost unheard of these days for someone to become engaged at our age, but sheesh, this ring seems to be sucking the brains out of everyone within fifty feet. I swear that the average IQ of Lawndale High has dropped thirty points since I stepped on campus.' Mack said, 'That, and causing guys within fifty feet to become unduly paranoid.'"

  • LLH Alternate Future - 09 - It Never Ends, by psychotol (parts 1 and 2): "'Are you going to cause problems Daria?' asked Stacy. 'Problems for whom?' asked Daria. 'That means "yes",' translated Jane." (Part 2)

  • Quinn's Code 05: Morgendorffers vs. Amazon, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "That night Sandi Griffin looked in her mirror after cleaning her teeth. 'I'll will win that modeling contract! The Geekendorffer will not get it!!' She decided to find a way to sabotage Quinn's chances. 'There is no way that she will be allowed to win,' she thought with a slight frown."

  • The Real Legion (LLH Mini), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'I'm Jasper Wells, Miss Morgendorffer,' the man said. 'Quest Industries - Global Public Affairs. I’m with the Entertainment Division, and I used to work with ZNN. Miss Hall sent me to talk to you about the possibility of a reality show featuring the Legion.'"

  • A Song About a Quail (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria's face suddenly had a huge, out-of-character grin on it as she spotted another camp alumni who was drawing near. 'AMELIA!' she cried out. 'DARIA!' Amelia returned. The two embraced warmly."

  • Tigresses of Lawndale (Reposted), by taishigi (part 11): "Seeing Amy still looked stunned, Daria realized what she should do. She took Amy's hand and asked, 'Are you my mother?' 'No,' Amy replied, her eyes wide. 'Aren't my parents alive? Solvent? Non-abusive, and even, in their own clumsy way, at least somewhat caring?' Amy nodded. 'And, whatever our private opinions, aren't they legally sane?' 'I suppose,' Any conceded. 'Then I absolve you of any moral dilemmas.'"

  • The True Story of How Tiffany Blum-Deckler Destroyed the Fashion Club, by ticknart (COMPLETE!): "'And it’s such a shame,' continued Sandi, 'that all my years of training went to waste.' Tiffany took a non-committal sip. 'I mean, seriously, what is Stacy thi--' 'I think,' interrupted Tiffany, taking the straw out of her mouth and speaking slowly, 'that she looks cute.'"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Charles RB (part ): "KILLER: I'm KILLER QUINN, the PRINCIPAL of this high school - and Educator Burnout here says you jerks DIDN'T DO YOUR HOMEWORK! Time for PUNISHMENT! BURNOUT: Yuhhhhh... ERIC: B-But we weren't told of any homework- Panel 2. Extreme close-up of Killer Quinn with a chainsaw! KILLER: EXACTLY!!"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "'Lisa, don't you think I would know if I had a tattoo?' Sandi frowned as she and the cheerleader walked out of the girl's showers, wrapped in towels. 'Something like that would be a fashion don't of the lowest order!'"

Sunday, December 11, 2011

I Wonder Who Gets to Lead?


Happy Tango Day! Daria is joining the celebration, somewhat unwillingly, with her unusual partner.

Today is also the anniversary of the day UNICEF was established, back in 1946. Not only has the organization provided much-needed help for children around the world, but it also gave Eric Schrecter someone to wrongfully sue in "One J at a Time."

Fandom News!

Friday, December 9, 2011

Happy Birthday, Mack Daddy!


Happy birthday to Kevin Daniels, born on this day in 1976! Daniels was the second of three voice actors to play Mack on Daria, spanning all of the third season appearances of the character. I bet Mack himself wished he could trade off with two other people in dealing with Kevin.

Fanfic Update!
  • God Save The Esteem ep 38: Highland Lassie, by Charles RB (part 2): "Trent opened the door and looked at Amy Barksdale. 'Whoa. You look different without your jacket, Daria.' 'Daria? I thought you were out until mblblbbl hi'"

  • Jane Morgendorffer 2: The Middle School Years, by LadieT (part 5): "'Thanks Quinn, I really needed this. I know you aren't having a good time - ' Jane was stopped in mid sentence by Quinn. 'That's not true, I miss spending time with just you. You're my big sister. I love Daria and Trent, but you come first. You go shopping with me and I know how much you hate that, so it's only fair that I should go running with you sometimes. Besides, I know you've been feeling a little lonely since Daria's been hanging out with Danny. I just wanted to remind you, that well I'm here for you.'"

  • Life After Highland Ch. 2: 3 of Swords, by LadieT (part 1): "Jane was stunned at how similar in appearance Daria and Amy were. It sunk into Jane's mind that if the drinking water in Highland hadn't stunted Daria's growth, she would almost be a mirror image of her aunt. Hell, if I didn't know better, I would have thought that Amy was Daria's mom instead of Helen."

  • Mission: Unfashionable, by JPAGC (part 2a): "At the urge of a motion and look by Jodie, Quinn also joined the group. The other young men and women looked at one another in the sudden quiet Hall. Quinn looked around: all the other, veteran, students were all quickly scurrying away, keeping quiet and clearly avoiding looking in the Principal’s direction. 'Miss Landon, are all the new students here?' asked the Principal. 'Yes, Miss Li,' said Jodie in a quiet voice."

  • Parallel Universes Mystery (Non-Daria), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Chris opened the door of the Interdimensional Time machine onto a lot of confusion... 'This is a problem,' Jess said, as she looked out. 'I agree,' Chris said. 'Hello, you received our interdimensional message?' someone said. 'Yes,' Chris and Jess said together 'Then come with me,' she said."

  • A QB Grows in Lawndale, by Kristen Bealer (part 12): "He turned another corner and looked at the patterns made by the streetlights filtering through the trees as he thought about Link. Why do I even want to pick another fight with Dad? It's not like I'm even sure I wanna do this, anyway. It'd be like I'm making a big deal about something I don't even want. Or at least I think I don't hey is that Daria?"

  • A Rather Interesting Way To Go (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "'So who the poor unimportant sap that kicked the bucket this time? Said Jane Lane, One part of the mortician team that would work to make Tom look good for the show. 'That poor bastard is Tom' said Daria who is the other half of the team."

  • They Don't Cry (Iron Chef: Crazy Pairing Story!), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "'Mmm, Jeff?' Dawn cooed, hoping maybe tonight would be the night things would change. He was in such a good mood tonight. Maybe he'd be up for it. 'Wuzzat, Beautiful?' The muscular young man grunted, not moving from his embrace of his lover's plush body. 'You know there's that school dance coming up?' Dawn said, casually. 'Yeah, so?' Jeffy's tone wasn't at all encouraging."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Jane in your Home Town), by neonhomer (COMPLETE!): "I was heading home from a jobsite, when I spotted a car on the side of the road, with out of state plates, with its four-way flashers on. I slowed down, and pulled over. A girl wearing a red jacket gets out of the driver's seat. 'Yall need help?' I ask as I walk up."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Old Daria.), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "When Daria could take no more of the over-endowed blond bimbo sitting in the chair next to her bed mangling The Aeneid with her squeaky voice (she was the granddaughter of an old classmate, wasn't she? What was her name? Damn senility...), Daria called out to a nearby nurse."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Mack shook his head. 'What he hell's up with Upchuck and your mom, anyway?' 'Well, he saw her in that really skimpy elf-outfit she wore for her Christmas card a few years back-' Jane's laugh warmed the room. 'The one she'd done as a little gag gift for your dad?' Tom joined in on her laughter. 'The one the printers mistook for their cards to be sent out to everyone on their Christmas card list.'"

Thursday, December 8, 2011

"...A date which will live in infamy..."


Mack as Patton is saluting because today is the anniversary of the United States' entry into World War II by declaring war on Japan. It was a response to the Pearl Harbor attack of the previous day, and was marked by Franklin Roosevelt's famous "Infamy Speech."

Fandom News!

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

"I think that I shall never see / A poem lovely as a tree."


Happy birthday to the late poet Alfred Joyce Kilmer, born on this day in 1886. Kilmer is relevant to Daria as the person for whom the Lawndale public library is named, as you can see on the right.

Today is also the birthday of Steven Wright, born in 1955. We'll leave Luhrmann to do his rather good impression of the comedian, although Daria's delivery isn't bad, either.

Finally, on a sadder note, the tragic Altamont free concert took place on this day in 1969. Jake was apparently in attendance, per his remark in "Road Worrier": "Terrible tragedy, but I demanded my money back and I got it." Gouka Ryuu wrote an excellent short scene based on that line.

Fanfic Update!
  • Be Careful What You Wish For, by Doggieboy (part 4): "John opened the phone and said, 'Hello?' 'John?' Tananda’s voice said from the other end. 'You’re not Scarlett.' 'I know that.' 'Well, where is she?' 'Uh, she’s busy.' After a couple of seconds, she giggled. 'Oh, I see.'" (SFMB)

  • Daria 3000: Dye! Dye! My Mutated Abomination (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Don't you get it? The lady or the tiger -- now you don't have to choose?' 'What's a tiger?' Tom asked, clueless. 'A species of big cat. They went extinct centuries ago during the climate crisis of the late 21st,'"

  • The Lady and the Tiger, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): 'Hobbes bounced over and excitedly said, "You came back! You came back!' Daria looked down at the tiger. 'Yes, I'm back and, okay, you're real. There was nothing in the soda glass.'"

  • A New Set of Rules, by Dennis (part 23): "Putting his hands out, he added, 'Come sit with me.' Daria hesitated for just a moment, old fears of intimacy warring with current desire. This is why you wanted Colleen out of the apartment, stupid, she berated herself. Finally, she slid in next to him on the couch and, ignoring the parts of her that said no, pulled his arms around her. She half-smiled at his satisfied hum. 'This is nice,' she said, and meant it."

  • A QB Grows in Lawndale, by Kristen Bealer (part 11): "'Are you having trouble with your classwork?' Kevin waved off the question. 'It's not that. Um, what would you say if I said I was thinking about going into a teaching-type career?' Mr. DeMartino didn't say anything right away. He didn't even move. Then, his eye twitched very, very slightly. After almost a full minute of silence, he finally exhaled and said, 'I would say that sometimes life is just bursting with irony.'"

  • Quinn's Code 05: Morgendorffers vs. Amazon, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "'You know, Daria, right?' Cindy asked. 'Somewhat, I know Jane more,' Jennifer said. 'That's mostly what Quinn said a few weeks ago. I thought it might have changed,' Cindy said. 'It hasn't,' Jennifer said. 'Oh,' Cindy said, as Jennifer turned off Glen Oaks Lane. 'Did you have a pont?' 'Yeah, do you know why Daria is hostile towards Quinn?' Jennifer was silent for a moment as she thought. 'She hasn't said anything,' she said. 'Quinn hasn't either,' Cindy said as she thought."

  • Tigresses of Lawndale (reposted), by taishigi (parts 9 and 10): "Quinn realized that she wanted, perhaps even needed, a real friend; a friend like Jane was with Daria. Not that Quinn would want Jane for a friend. At that point all the little pieces jumbled in Quinn's mind came together to form a picture. Quinn wanted to be friends with her sister." (Part 10)

  • Unnamed story, by neonhomer (part 1): "'We’ll take her to the Enterprise. Computer. Transfer the EMH program to the Enterprise sickbay computer. Dr. Crusher, you are needed on the Enterprise, medical emergency. We found Captain Morgendorffer. Picard to Enterprise, medical emergency! Four to beam directly to Sickbay.' Said Picard, giving no one a chance to get a word in. A few seconds later, they were appearing in the Enterprise Sickbay. The EMH reappeared, just as Dr. Crusher was appearing."

Monday, December 5, 2011

Have a Mug of Feisty Beer!


It was on this day in 1933 that the Twenty-first Amendment was ratified, ending Prohibition. That means old-timey bartender Upchuck is free to serve you as much booze as you like! I'm not sure I'd trust any bartender with a smile like that, though.

Also on this day, Walt Disney was born in 1901. Without him we would have fewer saccharine animated movies, fewer gigantic amusement parks, and the gang would have had to come up with a different "C" thing to bring to the picnic in "Road Worrier." You know, looking at the sequence of the game, it appears that Jesse is the one who came up with "the cryogenically frozen head of Walt Disney." That seems like way more syllables than Jesse is usually capable of.

Fandom News!

Saturday, December 3, 2011

I'm Sure Brittany Assumed That Was a Romance Novel, Too


Happy birthday to the late novelist Joseph Conrad, born on this day in 1857. Conrad wrote Heart of Darkness, the book Daria is shown reading at the end of the episode "Gifted." In her words, "A young man's journey into unknown territory brings him face-to-face with the savage brutality within his own soul." It's not quite Jodie's How to Win Friends and Influence People, but it's almost certainly more interesting.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria - Double Down, by neonhomer (COMPLETE!): "'How is that possible?' asked Quinn. 'What?' said Lynn. 'To be a brain and fashionable at the same time.' 'Who said I was fashionable? I just have a little more intelligence than your average carrot.' Said Lynn."

  • Daria on Exchange (Iron Chef: Daria and Jane in your Home Town), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "Jane Lane stepped off the train and looked at the railway station that looked similar to the other railway stations that the train had stopped at since it had left Sydney that morning. 'So this is Armidale? So far it seems to be like Lawndale without the Lawn, and Australian,' she thought."

  • God Save The Esteem ep 38: Highland Lassie, by Charles RB (part 1): "It had been almost two years but Highland still looked the same, and that was a source of great sadness for Daria. Worse, she knew, it would still smell the same, especially around the back of Burger World. 'Now I know it’s not easy for you girls, going back to an old town,' said her father. 'Especially not for you, Daria, right?' 'Snake, dear, we only have to do that speech when we’re moving somewhere new.'"

  • Lawndale and Sandi Griffin’s Genie (Chapter 6), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "Daria and Jane were up in Daria’s room listening to the radio when Helen entered the room. 'Daria, Jane, Dinner is ready,' she said. 'It’s Dad’s cooking, isn’t it?' Daria asked. 'Yes,' Helen said with a sigh. 'We’ll be right down,' Daria said, getting up. 'What do you think we’ll find?' Jane asked after Helen had gone. 'Lot of spices,' Daria said."

  • Lawndale in the Air (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "As soon as she cleared the plane, Daria pulled her chute cord, slowing her rate of descent. She looked and saw her father bringing the plane level and heading in the direction of his new workplace. She looked down towards the school that she would be going to for the next few years and saw Quinn deploy her pink chute, rather close to the landing deck. 'She always was a daredevil,' she thought."

  • A QB Grows in Lawndale, by Kristen Bealer (part 10): "'So screw it. As soon as I get home, I'm going to tell him off good! There's stuff I've wanted to say for a really long time and now he's going to hear it.' Kevin froze. Something was very familiar about the things Link was saying, and he realized that he might have said the exact same thing about himself and his father more than a week ago. And look how that ended up. 'Hey, man, are you sure you wanna do that? Because--' '--Damn right I do!'"

  • Rude Awakening Ep.9: Join The Club, by DIsaac (part 9): "DARIA: If there is no problems. Then my next question is Why in the hell are you bickering in the middle of my station. SANDI: IT'S ALL TIFFANY'S FAULT! TIFFANY: IT'S ALL SANDI'S FAULT! ALEESHA: IT'S ALL QUINN'S FAULT! QUINN: IT'S ALL........WHOEVER THE HELL SHE IS FAULT!"

  • Tigresses of Lawndale (Reposted), by taishigi (parts 6 - 8): "Quinn stood up. 'I am no more an airhead than you are a misery chick. However, I assure you, you used to act that way, or at least give that impression. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to rush to be ready for my date.' 'I think I like her better this way,' Jane said brightly. Daria just mumbled and grumbled and went to call out for a pizza with extra cheese." (Part 7) (Part 8)

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef - In the movies), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "'I couldn’t help it,' Quinn whined. 'It just popped in there.' 'What?' Daria and Jane chorused. 'What "just popped in there?"' 'I tried to think—' 'You picked now to try to think?' Daria demanded."

Friday, December 2, 2011

Send in the (Economical) Clowns!


Happy birthday to Charles Ringling, one of the Ringling Brothers, born on this day in 1863. The Ringling Brothers created one of the most successful circuses of all time, which may be of interest to Daria, who swore to join the circus at the idea of her parents, well...you know. And given Jake and Helen's enthusiasm, I think she just might have to.

Today is also Britney Spears' birthday, although I think even the Fashion Club has lost interest in her by now. Aren't you all glad I went with the Mrs. Bennett circus clown alter ego over the Ms. Barch Britney Spears alter ego, though?

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