Sweep the Leg, Sandi!

Sandi is practicing her martial arts so she can be ready for International Ninja Day. Or she's preparing to take back control of the Fashion Club by any means necessary. Any. Means. Necessary.

Today is also the anniversary of Walt Disney's birth on this day in 1901. If you want, you could celebrate by taking his cryogenically frozen head to a picnic!

Fandom News!

• Vukodlak posted a new Iron Chef: Oh no he’s hot now.


• Erin M has an odd question about "eep!"


• Share your ideas for a misguided KFC romance novel.


• cfardellbrenorenz29 started a new thread for his art.

Give 'Em a Hug and Take 'Em to Disneyland!

Daria's tolerating a hug from her parents for Global Hug Your Kids Day, but I have a feeling she's glad this is a once-a-year kind of thing. Jake and Helen seem pretty content, just as long as neither of them ruin the moment by saying something stupid like, well, anything.

Today is also the anniversary of the opening of Disneyland in 1955. In addition to Jane's ambition to one day work for Disney, I think it's a safe bet that Kevin will one day win a Super Bowl and announce that he's going to Disneyland. Or Narnia. I wouldn't put anything past that guy, honestly.

Fandom News!

• tjdolf is looking for The Fashion Club Massacre by Roentgen.


• Pay your respects at the passing of George Romero, Bob Wolff, and Martin Landau.

Booze and Disney--They Go Together Surprisingly Well!

Jodie's celebrating Repeal Day in the traditional flapper style, because it was on this day in 1933 that the last necessary state ratified the 21st Amendment and repealed Prohibition. Now Jodie is free to drink as much as she likes, as long as her parents don't catch her at it.

Today is also the anniversary of Walt Disney's birth in 1901, and without him and his cryogenically frozen head we'd have no humorous additions to the picnic game in "The Road Worrier."

Fandom News!

• Offer your sympathy and discuss the circumstances of the fire in Oakland, California.


• Keep up with the Eurozone crisis and share your thoughts.


• How do you feel about people who get tattoos, body art, or...? Discuss it in the thread.


• Szcz posted a new Iron Chef in Creative Writing: Hippypunk.

Booze for All!

Brittany's here to celebrate Repeal Day, the day that Prohibition was repealed and alcohol could once again flow freely (not that it ever really stopped). Better grab a cold one before Kevin beats you to it!

Today also happens to be the anniversary of Walt Disney's birth in 1901, and without him and his cryogenically frozen head, the "I'm Going to a Picnic" game in "Road Worrier" would have been far less interesting.

Fandom News!

• How evil are you? Take the quiz and find out!


• Discuss the most recent mass shootings and what could be done to stop them.


• Talk about the impending return of Samurai Jack on Toonami.

Jane Lane and the Seven Dwarves

Jane's getting in touch with her cuddly side because it was on this day in 1955 that Disneyland opened its doors for the first time. As a result, Kevin Thompson knows exactly where he's going to go after he wins the Super Bowl.

Fanfic Update!

• Critters, by Snow-Kitty (COMPLETE!): "He heard rustling from branches above his head, and glanced up for a moment, his eye bulging in annoyance, to see the source of the irritating noise. His face lit up when he noticed three squirrels sitting in a row on one of the branches."


• Daria and Jane: In The 'Unethical' Experiment (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: No longer in the 1%), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "


• Daria: College Pains Redux, by James the Lesser (part 17): "Daria sees Luke's new car pull up to the gates. 'You're two minutes late.'"


• I do (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: No longer in the 1%), by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "'So Amiga' Jane said with a smile. 'I always knew you'd end up as my sister-in-law and today is the day, mwahaahaahaaa!'"


• Possibilities, by Sureia (part 9): "Matt ignored the shout and continued straight upstairs. He would not look back and he would not slam the door to his room. He would not give her the satisfaction."


• Renewment, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "Seated on a lounge chair under an umbrella in the back yard, Helen deleted a file, set her tablet computer aside and rolled her head back in frustration. 'Ugh! That was worse than Twilight fanfiction.'"


• Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part III), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Without any warning or provocation Tom politely pushed past Angela Li and cut her speech for the Lawndale High graduation ceremony short. He glanced up to the sky and uttered a silent prayer for himself and those around him. He muttered an apology for what carnage he would soon unleash upon the world."


• Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part III), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Moar food! MOAR!' Tom Sloane bellowed at his skinny, starving servants as they gathered even more food for their morbidly obese master."


• Without Warning, by Princess-Pasta (part 18): "Summer descended upon Lawndale quickly, bringing with it sweltering heat and high humidity. The only consolation for Jace was the fact that school was out."


• You and I, We're Angels (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: No longer in the 1%), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "Drowning, apparently, was supposed to be a pleasant sensation. She wouldn't know. All she'd thought as she had sunk was that she couldn't let go. Never let go."

Please Don't Let Her Start Singing....

On this day in 1955, Disneyland opened its doors and began welcoming small children and Super Bowl winners for years to come. Jane seems surprisingly happy in her role as the Disney version of Snow White, but then again she did say she wanted to get a job with Disney in "Look Back in Annoyance." Maybe she's just trying to kiss up.

Fanfic Update!

• Death Comes to Another Lawndale, by PrecambrianStudios (parts 1 - 3): "John sat up in bed and stretched. He checked his clock and saw that it was time for a shower." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Dylan, by J-D (part 23b): "'Congratulations on getting the lead in the play’, Dylan said to Kris. Their father looked up from his dinner. 'What play is that?’"


• The Fate that Summer Lane Deserved, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Just roll her over, it's how Hendrix died.'"


• Flush With Love (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: MY EYES THEY BURN!!), by SacredDust (COMPLETE!): "'Pssst.' Jane looked up from the sink where she was washing her hands. 'Psssst! Hey. Over here.'"


• Great Professor Dario Ch. 1 A fresh start, by ST91 (part 2): "'Come on mom,' said an embarrassed Dario, 'I did not do anything special, it is also for this reason that I came back to live with you, to help you in every possible way.'"


• How Not to Make a Tequila Sunrise (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "He tried in vain to hit back, and Todd was about to knife him in the neck when a grey-tuxedoed man stepped out of the kitchen, irate."


• The Ianuzzi's Meet the Man and the Boss (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "The sun dripped on down all across the New Mexican desert, and in their new disguises Todd and Jane Ianuzzi lapped up the heat, the latest Daft Punk single blasting out of the truck they stole from that guy they killed on their way out of Highland."


• I'm ACTUALLY the craziest of them all (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "I knew they faked their death when I heard the news and I knew where they were coming too. You see Tom wasn't the only guy me and Jane shared. little did Little Janey know. I was her."


• I'm Tagging With the Band: Meeting Daria, by Shiva (part 4): "It had only been half an hour, but to Amy it felt like days. 'Well it isn't everyday that you fall face-first into a rabbit hole Amy.' A bemused voice whispered in the corner of her mind."


• In the Executive Suite After Dark... (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: MY EYES THEY BURN!!), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "It had been a hard road, but President Tom Sloane, the 48th President of the United States was now settling down for his first night in the Executive Suite of the White House with his wife, Daria Sloane (nee. Morgendorffer)."


• Invasion of Privacy, by GDTSP9 (parts 1 - 7): "'Girls, I just want you to know your mother and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new town -- especially for you, Daria, right?' Jake glanced at Daria in the rear vision mirror only to see she was looking away. He wondered why Daria never seemed to look directly at her parents." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)


• Jane's Aunt Lois (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: MY EYES THEY BURN!!), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "On day at the local Pizza Prince in boring old Lawndale, the Snarky Duo, Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane were eating pizza, drinking coffee, and in Daria's case also reading a newspaper."


• A Little Bathroom Reading (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by SacredDust (COMPLETE!): "The hallway was dark as Jane and Todd Ianuzzi crept into the Morgendorffer home to slaughter its inhabitants. It might've had something to do with all the lights being off."


• Minds Touched by Madness, by welltemperedclavier (COMPLETE!): "You’re onto something big, she told herself. Picasso could have only dreamed of revolutionizing art this way. Her work hailed as the voice of a generation manifested on canvas, the freedom to do as she wished, following the purity of vision." (Part 7) (Part 8) (Epilogue)


• The Mob Rules (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "There was a limo parked horizontally in the road, effectively blocking it. Todd’s eyes jerked open. It looked strangely familiar; if he let his imagination go, he would have thought it was the same one from Glen Oaks Lane."


• National Insecurity, by SacredDust (part 2): "Mack is gone. I'm not going to fool myself. I know where he is. They've taken him in for questioning and we know what that means--he's not coming back for a long time."


• Nurse Goodnsexy Meets the Legion! (The Adventures of Nurse Goodnsexy), by Shiva (part 2): "'Oh sugah!' Nurse Goodnsexy said with a giggle as she zipped her uniform back up with a hint of the limberness she had used to the max not all that long ago, 'This has to be one of the better receptions I've ever gotten!'"


• Only Love Can Kill The Demon (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "They'd picked up the hitchhiker on the way into Leeville."


• Random lines (Ever used Mystic Spiral kind of lyrics in real songs?), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "Trent made a break from looking at the cracks in the ceiling to stare, once again, at his song notebook he was holding. However, it hadn't changed from last time, a few minutes ago. It was still blank."


• The Ring of Fire (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by SacredDust (COMPLETE!): "I guess if the police stopped me they would see a nice, innocent looking 16-year-old girl with short blonde hair and blue eyes. Someone who could be their daughter or their niece, and a cop's daughter to boot. They would let me slide. What I'm about to do, though, is anything but innocent." (Part 2)


• Rise of the Atoner, by macross (parts 4 - 6): "Her head was killing her. That was Courtney Lane’s first coherent thought as she started to come to." (Part 5) (Part 6)

• Something (Slightly) Wicked Chapter 2, by macross (part 3): "The girls made their plans for their shopping destinations for the afternoon. Ally informed Scarlett and Daria of a great vintage clothing and record store, that had some amazing finds from the 70’s and 80’s, 'it’s called the Funky Doodle, it’s a few stores down from Stacie’s Dad’s Tattoo parlor on Dega Street.'"


• Sweet Dreams, by RLobinske (part 1): "Forming burger patties, Michael said, 'Do we have a clue yet?' 'Clue about what?' Daria said, though she suspected. 'What we're going to do for our anniversary? It's only 24 days away.'"


• Tom Sloane, Lax Bro, by Shiva (part 12): "I woke up on the floor about a foot away from my bed all. So I crawled to the nearest bathroom and had a jolly in the toilet."


• Tonight's the Night (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "They climbed into the van but before he could start it something came from behind and clamped over her nose and mouth. She struggled to breathe but it was no good, she went weak immediately then... blackness."


• Trentacious D (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: MY EYES THEY BURN!!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Some time ago, the Spiral boys were pushing the Tank (the engine had fallen out) down a long and lonesome road."


• Unexpected Hookup: Relative Madness, by Shiva (part 11): "Apocalyptic. Such a funny looking word to convey pure horror."


• Unnatural Born Killer (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by LadieTAG (parts 1 - 3): "The figure appeared in the bedroom of Jane and Todd Ianuzzi without making a noise. In his hand was a tiny ball of red light. He stared at the two in disgust, knowing what they had done." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• The Dale of Lawn, by Wassersauefer (part 16): "Back on the way to the overlords tent Jane whispered into Darias ear: 'I take it we will attack soon?' 'No', she only answered without looking up. 'They will attack us.'"


• Night Witches, by Panzerfaust150 (part 4): "The usual security around the base was a few USAF Security Policemen, armed with their ubiquitous holstered .38s in near perfectly creased OG fatigues, boots and badges shined to a gleaming standard, standing by the main gate and checking IDs and giving razor sharp salutes, and giving the kids of base personnel more jaunty ones once they were satisfied with your bona fides. Not today." (Part 4 on PPMB)


• Wild and Wonderful (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Sing me a song, sweetpea. Sing me a song, so I know that you love it.'"

Have a Mug of Feisty Beer!

It was on this day in 1933 that the Twenty-first Amendment was ratified, ending Prohibition. That means old-timey bartender Upchuck is free to serve you as much booze as you like! I'm not sure I'd trust any bartender with a smile like that, though.

Also on this day, Walt Disney was born in 1901. Without him we would have fewer saccharine animated movies, fewer gigantic amusement parks, and the gang would have had to come up with a different "C" thing to bring to the picnic in "Road Worrier." You know, looking at the sequence of the game, it appears that Jesse is the one who came up with "the cryogenically frozen head of Walt Disney." That seems like way more syllables than Jesse is usually capable of.

Fandom News!

• Talk about the latest developments in US aviation news.


• Check out a new article about fashion and glasses. Daria would be mortified!


• Anyone experienced eye floaters? Share your opinions and information in the thread.


• The honey badger: most badass animal? Talk about it at the SFMB!


• What do you think of Youtube's new look? Share your complaints or compliments in the thread.


• What films have you watched that are different the second time around?


• It's that time of year: share your favorite trivia about holiday songs.


• HolyGrail2007 has an idea for a new story and is looking for opinions on it.

Hi Ho, Janey-Oh!

As Daria's Sick, Sad Life Planner informs us, Disneyland is 55 years old today. Our Heroine, Jane Lane, takes on the role of Walt Disney's Snow White for the occasion, PLUS! the real Snow White from Disney for artistic comparison. Very clever, these MTV artists.

Charles RB offers up a new Iron Chef: Jane is Daria's imaginary friend. Ooooo...

NEW! RLobinske has updated the 2010 Big List o' Daria Visual Fanworks! Great works on display to the world! Hooray!

PPMB

• Apocalyptic Daria: Scarlett's Tale, by Doggieboy (Part 19): Scarlett didn’t know what time it was when she finally woke up. She laid still as she oriented herself to the darkened teacher’s office that was now their room. Roger's right arm was draped over her right side and his thumb was hooked into her panty waistband. My shirt must have rode up, she thought as she chuckled, or he made it ride up. Dirty boy. She smiled and carefully pulled his hand free. I wonder what the schedule is for the showers here.
• The Continuing Adventures of an ANGRY!!! Young Man, by Charles RB (Part 3): In military school, they’d taught him how to survive against all odds. On the football field, he’d learned how to endure great pain. As a high school student, he’d had to put up with lots of idiots. All of his skill and learning would be pushed to the test once more. It was time for History class with Mr. Thompson.
• Daria/Dorian 4: Partner's Compromise, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "...and, in conclusion, this project taught us many valuable lessons about financial transactions in the real world." Mack looked around the room. "Yeah," Kevin said, "like never leave a cash down payment." Kevin burst into tears. "Oh gosh, don't let them see me like this." The next thing anyone knew, Kevin was running out of the room. Mack watched in confusion as Kevin left. "Umm... thank you very much." Mrs. Bennett took a quick glance at her door before allowing Mack to sit down. Jodie gave him a sympathetic pat on the back. He just sat and shook his head. "Now Dorian and Jane will talk about budgeting a wedding."

• Finn Morgendorffer 53: Purely Magnetic, by HolyGrail2007 (Parts 2 and 3): “I’m just getting ready for Prom right now.” Finn returned, carefully steering the conversation. “Really? I’ve already got my dress picked out,” Stacy gushed. “Please say I can show you. Ohmigod, it’s totally great. Kyle totally thought so too, it’s going to match him perfectly!” “Kyle? Kyle Stentson, the junior on the soccer team?” “Yeah, he asked me, offered to buy my ticket...” “How does a guy who can’t even go somewhere ask you on a date?” “Finn, is there something about Kyle I should know?” Stacy asked innocently. (Part 3 here)
• First Born, by RLobinske (Part 6): "Good afternoon," Derek told the crowd. "Here's your chance to share your stories about friends and loved ones that served their country and are no longer with us. My thoughts are with everyone who ever served in the 21st Infantry Regiment, Massachusetts National Guard. From it's inception as the 21st Massachusetts Volunteers in 1862 to those currently on station in Iraq. All of you are by buddies." He stepped back and motioned to Daria to step forward. She crossed the stage and had to pull the microphone down to be heard. "I'm thinking about my grandfather, Nathan Morgendorffer. He was a Marine in the Korean War that landed at Inchon and was later wounded at Chosin. He was... he was never the same afterward."
• Grove Hell 2: All the Lawndale People, by Charles RB (part 1): Grove Hills had, in the frightened tones of people who are expecting lawsuits or (worse) bad press, informed the Morgendorffers’ that Daria had “run away” with a strange crew. So when Daria turned up at their house the next morning in the company of different strangers and with a dirt-covered skirt, Helen had screamed her head off. After she found out Daria had just gone to a concert, Helen just screamed. A lot. “I can’t BELIEVE you, young lady, this is COMPLETELY unacceptable you’ve put ME down, you’ve let your FATHER down and worst of all you’ve let YOURSELF down, you’re going straight back to Grove Hills—” “Hur hur hur, she said we’ve gone down on someone. Heh heh heh heh!” (FF.net)
  
• The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (Part 44): "Hi," said the stranger. "Megan Eastman." "Kiki Morgendorffer," Quinn said. "Morgendorffer?" Eastman asked. "Are you related to Daria Morgendorffer?" "Oh... no. No, it's entirely a coincidence. I'm an only child." "Well... good," said Megan, not entirely convinced.
• Judith Strikes! Educator DeMartino in "Malled!" by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): 1997! The rise of youth crime has forced teachers and the police to be merged into one… Only hard men can keep discipline! Hard men like EDUCATOR DEMARTINO! (Daria/Judge Dredd)
• Judith Strikes! Mack Dynamite vs. the Crimson Phantom, by Erin M. (Part 3): Mack Dynamite's eyes flashed open and he rolled out of bed just as the katana came swinging down and embedded itself in his mattress. He got to his feet, moving automatically into a fighting stance. Across the bedroom, Judith stood at the foot of his bed, arms folded, a smirk on the visible portion of her face. "Nice reflexes," she said.

• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (Part 17): "I was thinking we should concentrate around the Fenway or Kenmore Square. But... check this out, Jane. The Orange Line goes right near your school too. It stops at a station called 'Ruggles'." "You know, Daria, we could live anywhere we want. My dad says that the North End is really nice and they have fantastic Italian food." "Really?" Daria did a search for apartments there. "There are some good deals there." She went onto Wikipedia for more information on the North End. "Oh cool! Take a look at this, Jane. The North End was where the Great Molasses Disaster happened." "Molasses Disaster?"
• Unnamed story (Behind the scenes in a Daria fanfic), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): Jane eased the gag out of Tom's mouth. "Yeah, sorry about this, but..."
• Unnamed story (Behind the scenes in a Daria fanfic), by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): Stacy was beside herself with happiness. Micky, her very favorite uncle, was coming to Lawndale to film a segment for his cable TV series, Appallingly Filthy Working Conditions! on the Discovery Channel....
• Unnamed story (Behind the scenes in a Daria fanfic), by rglovejoy (COMPLETE!): After high school, Sandi moved out to California and moved in with her flamboyantly redheaded Aunt Kathy...
• Unnamed story (Behind the scenes in a Daria fanfic), by rglovejoy (COMPLETE!): Daria and Jane sat in the cheap plastic chairs, waiting. Jane passed the time playing computer solitaire while Daria flipped through this week's issue of the Economist. Jane's computer beeped.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Jane is Daria's imaginary friend), by Minx (COMPLETE!): "Now answer me," said Daria to Jane, "why do people think that I'm you?"
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Jane is Daria's imaginary friend), by Roxanne M (COMPLETE!): Artie was hunched in front of his computer screen. An odd assortment of lights were blinking on the display. "You wanted to see me, Artie?" He flinched and turned. "Claudia, I wish you would stop sneaking up on me." (Daria/Warehouse 13)
• Unnamed story (Raft College: The First Year), by rglovejoy (COMPLETE!): "Hey Daria, I wanna make these ginger cookies for Christmas, and we're all out of molasses. Could you pick some up when you go to the store?"
  

Who Watches the Watchmen?

Today is the 56th birthday of Alan Moore, creator of Watchmen, V for Vendetta, The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, and many other graphic novel and comics lines that have been crossed over with Daria by inventive fanfic writers. Thanks, dude! And thanks especially for Jane Lane's grandmother (or, you know, great aunt), Silhouette.

Oh, and Mickey Mouse is 61 years old today. Can you feel Daria's excitement?

Oh, well. Moar l8r.

It's a Small World After All

Were it not for Walt Disney, born 107 years ago today, we would not have "The Disney World Story" by Invisigoth Gypsy, or the cryogenically frozen head of Walt Disney from "Road Worrier," or that damn mouse, whatever his name was. Thanks, man. Good job with the cartoon movies, too.

Daria doesn't look all that happy with the presentation. Tough noogies, she needs the work.

I have almost completed a revamp of the Daria Directory, with more and shorter categories for easier finding of things, plus more noises, brighter images, etc. And more buttons, too. Because Lawndale Online is currently off-line, I used an archived version of the webpage for the Daria Chat IRC stuff, but it will be replaced when the website is back up.

Bullwhip Sandi?

The last in the series of possible patrilineal ancestors for Sandi Griffin is a very unusual one: Eric Griffin, better known as "Bullwhip" Griffin, from the Walt Disney movie of the same name. Once a Bostonian butler, Bullwhip joined the California Gold Rush and became rich and (on a smaller, more local scale) famous. His (fictional) story is described elsewhere, but part of it includes a hunt for a treasure map. Did Bullwhip leave behind his own map to secret riches, which Sandi discovers among her father's papers one Saturday afternoon?

The movie, by the way, is a lot of fun. A wacky minor legend worthy of being Sandi's ancestor.