Friday, February 28, 2020

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz


Daria and Jane have fully embraced Public Sleeping Day, but I'm afraid they have a long way to go to beat Trent's record on this one. I prefer to do my sleeping in private, if only to avoid Sharpie-related shenanigans.

Today is also Floral Design Day, so why not join Quinn in making a dainty garland for your head? Singing is optional.

Fanfic Update!
  • Choice and Chance for a Barksdale (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by EntrancedCat (part 2): "(Jake is driving his daughter, Quinn, and sister-in-law, Daria, to high school; Quinn is riding shotgun, Daria is in the back seat) Jake - Girls, I just want you to know your mother, uh, and Helen, uh, and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new town -- especially for you, Daria, right?"

  • Play It Again, Darling (Random Pairing Challenge 2020), by nightbeast37 (COMPLETE!): "'So what are you up to?' Daria asked Trent. 'Did some mid-level rock band turn up at your doorstep and request your services for 3 months? Or are you going for a so-called co-headlining tour with Bush?'"

  • The Seduction Of Quinn (Daria and Quinn), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Quinn are sitting on the couch watching TV. Cut to the TV screen and we see a handsome man and a beautiful woman make out passionately while a dead body lay on the floor with multiple stad wounds. The man had a blood soaked knife in his hand." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • The Stories in D, by Lady Evil (part 1): "'Ma belle Melody,' Gaétan sighed. 'How these raging flames highlight your hair and make your eyes sparkle.'"

Wednesday, February 26, 2020

Someone Munched a Bunch of the Wrong Lunch


Poor Quinn is not having a very good National Pistachio Day, but only because she's allergic to pistachio dye. I guess she can kiss that neck modeling career goodbye!

Today is also Tell a Fairy Tale Day, and the Gupty kids are eager to hear your new takes on the old classics. Bonus points if they include useful life lessons about child support and permanent records.

Finally, the episode "Sappy Anniversary" first aired on this day in 2001. Daria found out that Tom isn't the romantic type, and we found out that Jake likes to give malformed candles as gifts.

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Monday, February 24, 2020

Bet You "Cocktail" is One of His Favorite Movies


It's World Bartender Day, but I think Upchuck is severely underestimating the amount of beer needed for people to want to spend time around him. The correct amount is "approaching deadly levels of alcohol poisoning."

Poor eyesight would also help, which is why it's fitting that today is the anniversary of the episode "Through a Lens Darkly" in 1999. Of course, even without her glasses Daria knows better than to trust Upchuck. The question is, does Eunice?

Fanfic Update!
  • Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 17): "Jennifer laid on her bed, her socked feet planted on the wall behind her headboard. She had been in that position for the better part of the last two hours, bouncing a small rubber ball at the wall between her feet, and catching it on the rebound."

  • Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 33): "Quinn did everything she could to distract her grandmother ... and things worked for a while."

  • Everything to Fear But Camp Itself, by Lady Evil (COMPLETE!): "Back at Camp Grizzly, the paramedics were waiting. Tiffany, still sleeping, was whisked off to the nearest hospital. The police took Mr. Pott’s statement and asked about the missing boys. Allen and Link were presented."

Saturday, February 22, 2020

He's the Guy Who Cut Down the Cherry Tree With His Teeth, Right?


Kevin's ready to party for George Washington's birthday, but I dare you to ask him who Washington was. Bonus points if he answers "the dollar guy."

Of course, perhaps Kevin would surprise us all by actually getting an answer right! It could happen, because today is also World Thinking Day. We can always hope for a miracle, right?

Fandom News!

Thursday, February 20, 2020

Down, Boy! Bad Vibes!


It's Love Your Pet Day, but Helen doesn't look like she's feeling particularly affectionate toward Leary right now. A handful of Daria characters have pets, but very few of them appear onscreen. It's a shame, though--a Daria episode revolving around pets could have been amusing. Ah, well. I guess that's what fanfic is for!

Fanfic Update!
  • Choice and Chance for a Barksdale (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by EntrancedCat (part 1): "Newly minted fifteen-year-old Daria Barksdale yawned after her nap and smoothed down the pleats in her short black skirt. She left her room and padded down the stairs of her Baltimore townhouse."

  • Daria: High School Reunion, by Serrallonga (part 9): "DARIA: Are you kidding me? TOMMY: See by yourself (he extends his hand). I'd explain, but it will be faster and more explicit if we do that Vulcan mind-reading thing. Please?"

  • Edicius, by elainefr (part 24): "'Good morning ladies,' Helen walked into the Lane household looking around the next morning. Jane and Daria traded smirks while each taking a sip of the coffee that Trent had made after making a run to the all-night grocery store."

  • A Girl and Her Cat, by neonhomer (part 2): "'So, who pays for the pizza this time?' Asked Jane as she finished her slice and reached for another one."

  • A Lane’s Return to Lawndale (), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Summer Lane looked at Lawndale from the roadside. She usually hated returning to the place. This time was no different."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by Zetor (parts 2 and 3): "As she and Amy pulled up to the hotel, Daria spotted her other sisters, Rita and Helen, standing at the entrance alongside their significant others." (Part 3)

Tuesday, February 18, 2020

What Could Go Wrong?


Jane and Alison are ill-advisedly celebrating National Drink Wine Day, but as long as Jane keeps a level head and...never mind.

Today is also the anniversary of the publication of The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn in 1885. Daria would like to remind everyone that Huckleberry Hound is a complete different character who was not created by Mark Twain.

Fandom News!

Sunday, February 16, 2020

And the Winner Is...Fashion!


Stacy is thrilled to be named the winner of the Daytona 500, which is taking place later today. You can talk about dirt and grease and broken nails, but that's about the happiest I have ever seen Stacy so let's not ruin it for her.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Arts 'N Crass," which aired on this day in 1998. It was preceded by the Daria Day Marathon, and if you like fourth-wall breaking and metahumor then this will totally be totally your jam.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 28): "One class had Daria worried: Potions. Potions had acquired the reputation as being one of the toughest classes at Hogwarts: the professor wasn’t just strict, but also extremely sarcastic and demanding and was reputed to favor Slytherin, the House he headed."

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 35): "Tom and Darren were back to looking at each other through the windshields of their respective rovers. Tom reflected on how being a pioneer on the infinite frontier of space seemed to involve a tremendous amount of waiting and boredom."

  • Everything to Fear But Camp Itself, by Lady Evil (part 7): "'Well, here we are, Camp Grizzly.' said Bruno. 'How ya feeling, Kina?'"

  • A family Secret, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "« Can I come in ? » Quinn was surprised both by Daria’s hesitant demeanour and her embarassed question."

  • On the curb (Random Pairing Challenge 2020), by sarcasticsponge (COMPLETE!): "One early morning in Lawndale saw one Tom Sloan driving slowly around town contemplating about his life several months after Daria broke up with him."

  • T.A.Ts from a Magazine (Random Pairing Challenge 2020), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "'Ohhh,' Brittany Taylor cooed appreciatively as she studied the document enshrined on the wall. 'Great Prairie State University! I’m going there you know! Or maybe you don’t? But Ms. Manson, this says you, philosophiae doctoris uh, do philosophy. I thought you were a psychologist.'"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "It was a tuesday morning in Lawndale. In the Morgendorffer household, like countless homes across the US, this meant that its occupants prepared for yet another working day."

Friday, February 14, 2020

"Everything is cool. Everything is love, baby."


Cupid's feeling a little down, perhaps because he's worried that Valentine's Day has become less about love and romance and more about commercialization and corporate profit. Or he's just tired of walking around in an oversized diaper. If you'd like to know what Daria thinks about Valentine's Day, look no further than her editorial "What I Think About Valentine's Day," published in The Huffington Post.

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Wednesday, February 12, 2020

Whatever You Are, Be a Goth One


Andrea is even more stone-faced than usual, but it's only because today is Abraham Lincoln's birthday. Of course, he now has to share a holiday with George Washington instead, which may be why he's so grumpy on Holiday Island. Let's wish the sixteenth president a happy birthday, and whatever you do don't wear sandals around him.

Fanfic Update!
  • Burnt Wonderbread (Random Pairing Challenge 2020), by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "Jane didn't hate her dormmate. Usually. Marissa was pretty chill for an art history major, and never hassled her about the various projects, class assigned and not, that she brought into their small room."

  • Everything to Fear But Camp Itself, by Lady Evil (part 6): "'Kinda wish I brought my phone.' Link said after a while. 'I could pass the time playing Sweetie Smash.' He smacked his head as he realized what should’ve been obvious. 'Or, duh, call someone for help!'"

  • Glass Houses, by atiyatortilla (COMPLETE!): "Through everything, there’d always been lasagna."

  • More Her Type (Iron Chef: Random Pairing Challenge 2019), by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "Timothy had never expected to fall in love with Janet. Even during their relationship he could hardly deny that it was unusual. Not bad, mind you, and much more...passionate than any of his previous experiences dating, but their eventual breakup, while painful, was not fully unexpected."

  • Sunshine, by Ray by Another Name (COMPLETE!): "It was a foggy day in Boston, the air smelled vaguely of fish and the bus was - per usual - stuffed like a sardine tin."

Monday, February 10, 2020

It's Raining, It's Pouring, the Old Goth is Snoring


Andrea's ready for Umbrella Day, although she'd be better protected if she actually held the umbrella fully over her head. Ah, well, it doesn't seem to be raining so I guess the umbrella is just for show.

Fandom News!

Saturday, February 8, 2020

Disclaimer: Cookies Do Not Contain Girl Scouts


Jane had better look out, because it's National Girl Scout Cookie Day and she's in danger of incurring another Girl Scout cookie debt. Of course, perhaps she's safe from the temptation since her Girl Scout deprogramming, but you can never be too careful.

Today is also Boy Scout Day, and 1950's Jake will probably lead his troop in a rousing chorus of "America the Beautiful" before someone accuses them of being Reds.

Fanfic Update!
  • Aunt Daria (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by Meester_Lee (part 1): "The taxi slowed down, then pulled into the driveway at 1111 Glenn Oaks Drive. A well-dressed, auburn-haired girl got out of the cab and walked back towards the cab’s trunk. The driver opened the trunk and lifted out three suitcases and set them on the concrete."

  • Daria and Jane Learn Geography NOW!, by brothergrimace1 (COMPLETE!): "Jane: I changed my mind. (Daria looks at her) I'm okay with Quinn helping you out with this one."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 27): "Daria’s next class was Defense Against the Dark Arts. She looked forward to it with a mixture of worry and anticipation."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 34): "After work Erin waited till only Michelle was left. 'Do you still want that wine?' Erin asked."

  • Everything to Fear But Camp Itself, by Lady Evil (part 5): "'Well, hey, look at this sexy thing!' said Jake, pulling out a negligee. 'When were you going to surprise me with this?'"

  • A Gentle Push From The Nest, by brothergrimace1 (COMPLETE!): "'Rossalyn! A friend of yours from school is here to see you!"

  • Mine, by Vukodlak (part 13): "Quinn stood in front of the mirror holding up various skirts seeing which one would complete yet another perfect outfit."

  • Naked Eyes (Daria and Quinn), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Daria was sitting on the couch writing on her laptop. Her cat, Godzilla, was curled up next to her. Something seemed to grab the cat's attention as he suddenly scurried off of the couch and onto the floor." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "Daria Barksdale sat in the passenger seat of her older sister's convertible, watching the East Coast landscape fly by—far faster than it legally should be."

Thursday, February 6, 2020

The Sultan of "Yeah"


Jesse's up to bat in honor of Babe Ruth's birth on this day in 1895. I'm surprised to see Jesse not only engaged in something more active than strumming a guitar but actually wearing a shirt. What has he come to?

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Tuesday, February 4, 2020

But Maybe Not THAT Mailman


DeMartino's eager to accept your gratitude on Thank a Mailman Day, but I don't recommend it. He seems to be channeling his inner Metal Mouth.

Today is also the day George Washington was elected president in 1789, at which point he apparently told a young lady that she was tardy. At least, that's what Brittany thinks. In real life I'm sure he was actually much more focused.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria of the Milieu: Chasing Wormtrails, by Meester_Lee (part 1): "Wilmington! That was one of the hot stories this week. Every journo who could had dashed off to Wilmington with pens, paper, laptops, cell phones, and video cameras to interview the latest arrivals from Earth Gimel."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 26): "Daria looked at her pocket-watch. It was time. She knocked softly on the Professor's door. 'Come in,' he said."

  • Daria the Vampire Slayer: Hell Comes To Texas, by Charles RB (part 12): "The first Daria knew of the situation was when she arrived at school to find the police already there, dragging a number of people away."

  • Edicius, by elainefr (part 22): "'Come on, breathe damn it!' (v/o) His voice sounded very far away. 'That's it; you can- do it-'"

  • The Engineer and the Time Lady, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "The next day, Alpha returned to Nina's quarters. Nina soon came to the door. 'Good morning,' Alpha said cheerfully."

  • Everything to Fear But Camp Itself, by Lady Evil (parts 3 and 4): "'You got a lot of stuff in these boxes.' Link commented as he helped Helen open one. 'I thought we got rid of all our old stuff before we left Highland.' said Helen. 'Amazing what accumulates in just two years!'" (Part 4)

  • Journey Into Misery, by Captain Marbles (part 3): "Daria stood beside the hospital bed fingering her Norse hammer amulet nervously, staring down at her best friend and partner in crime, Jane. Fellow Cynic and Artiste Extraordinaire."

  • Sympathy for the Sloane, by YouthofOz (part 5): "It was even money over who was more terrified as Tom bolted through the cellar door and wrenched the door shut behind him."

  • Tell Me I'm a Wreck, by conquerlove (fullbrightness) (part 1): "The phone call at two AM was anything but pleasant. I had fallen asleep after trying to write a new article for the magazine I work for; the topic, Heating Up or Cooling Down, was about relationships of all things."

Sunday, February 2, 2020

"Go, teams, go!"


Looks like the football team is getting a head start on celebrating the Super Bowl taking place later today. Or they're just really excited about the school review meeting Ms. Li announced.

For those less interested in sports, today is also Groundhog Day! You know, the day where we expect a large rodent to accurately predict the weather? Oy. Maybe we'd all be better off going to that school review meeting.

Fandom News!