Thursday, June 29, 2017

Say Cheese!


Tom would just like to take this opportunity to wish everyone a happy Camera Day, but also to remind you all that if you wish to record your loved ones on camera then it's best to get their permission first. Quinn further adds that if you are requested to stop zooming, then for the love of God stop zooming! Oh, and she also wants to make sure everyone knows that her pores are both cute and tiny.

On another note, today is the anniversary of the episode "Gifted," which first aired on this day in 1998. Although Daria and Jodie ultimately decided against attending Grove Hills, more than one fanfic has explored what might happen if one or both had decided to go there after all. It generally does not end up being an improvement over Lawndale High, which supports Daria's point that "life sucks no matter what, so don't be fooled by location changes."

Fanfic Update!
  • The Absolute Bastard, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "The stocky man with heavy-lidded eyes stepped out from the armored guard post (to the eyes of most, it may as well have been called a 'bunker'), and let his eyes run over the old, yet well-kept pickup truck before he looked up to see the driver - a slender young man in a Navy service uniform." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Atlas Scowled Or How I fell in love with the Free Market (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "It was a dark and rainy night in New York city whose lights reflected off the dark low clouds. Daria quietly sat in the living room of the luxury hotel room she was staying at during her business trip."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 18a): "Daria counted on Jessie Markham's friendship as a given. Jessie was one of the people that made Highland tolerable, that they could talk about things that didn't involve boys or football, and that they'd both be there for each other."

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (COMPLETE!): "The two women rode up in the elevator and walked to Mr. Bergen's office. As they walked past the secretary Daria noticed that the door was open."

  • The More Things Change (Iron Chef: The New Canon), by Two-Eyed Charlie (parts 9 and 10): "It was now late Saturday evening, and a noticeable layer of rainwater covered every inch of the island of Manhattan." (Part 10)

  • Of Inhuman Bonding, by Kristen Bealer (part 4): "The Fashion Club was settling into their sleeping bags (or, in Sandi's case, the bed). No one had spoken above a quiet murmur since they'd come into the room, and no one had spoken directly to Stacy at all. Stacy said nothing, but the viciousness with which she was punching her pillow left no question about how she felt."

  • Second Chances, by Lady Evil (part 5): "I wonder if he's forgotten. Jane thought as she walked up the steps. If he's asleep, I'm never bothering with him again! Before she could knock, the door opened and there was Jesse, wearing running shorts, sneakers and very little else."

Tuesday, June 27, 2017

Are They Keeping Track of the Visions in Their Eyes?


Jane and Trent are looking cool for Sunglasses Day, although I think wearing them at night might impair their vision a bit. Then again, when you're the reluctant guests at a hellish family reunion, perhaps you don't really want to see much.

Fandom News!

Sunday, June 25, 2017

Chief Mack Daddy


Mack is looking fairly content as Sitting Bull on the anniversary of the Battle of Little Bighorn, which happened on this day in 1876. If General Custer was anything like Kevin Thompson, then I can understand Mack's good mood here.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Boxing Daria," which aired on this day in 2001. There weren't any epic battles or charges, but Daria did end up in a horrific multi-car crackup, whispering Tom's name over and over in a desperate bid not to slip into a coma. Oh, wait. That was only in Tom's imagination.

Fanfic Update!
  • And You Are? (Iron Chef : Daria and Helen have the same age), by neonhomer (part 2): "Helen sat up, and shook her head, trying to clear the fog in her mind. 'What a nightmare!' As she forced herself to focus, she could see she was sitting on what seemed like a park bench. 'Where am I?'"

  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 28): "'We got all but twelve of them,' said Chris Haggard. 'What do we reckon they will do?' asked the superintendant."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (parts 16c and 17): "When they reached Sonora, they didn't go directly to their motel; instead Jake drove to the caverns. The caverns weren't actually in the town of Sonora, but west of it. To get to the Caverns, they had to drive west of town on Interstate 10 for 14 miles." (Part 17)

  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 16): "'I have something to tell- well, show you- and don't freak out okay?' Daria said into the phone that she held level with her face."

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 3): "'Hey Ted,' Daria stepped into the gym. One of her classes that day had been canceled due to the instructor getting the flu."

  • Finding a Needle (Hiding in Plain Sight (Alternate LLH, Plot Bunny to Kill)), by RLobinske (part 1): "Michael Fulton used a long-handled gripper to pick up the scrap of paper and bring it to his left hand at the opening of the collection bag resting against the leg of his Ark Museum uniform."

  • Of Inhuman Bonding, by Kristen Bealer (part 3): "'...and no one told her! She did the entire interview with a giant hunk of spinach wedged between her teeth!' Helen was almost bent over with laughter. 'I can't imagine why she's never mentioned that part of her precious Rosalynn Carter interview!'"

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef), by Two-Eyed Charlie (COMPLETE!): "Superman: 'It's just what we feared everyone--Darkseid is on his way to Earth!' Aquaman: 'That galactic tyrant's thirst for power is unstoppable! But why Earth? Why always us?'"

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "In the dark of night in the local cemetery, which for a town like Lawndale had a surprising number of mausoleums and marble tombs big enough to sit on."

  • The Witches of Gideon Thurber High (Hiding in Plain Sight (Alternate LLH, Plot Bunny to Kill)), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Everyone was actually stunned into silence when she walked through the foyer of Gideon Thurber Preparatory Academy that Monday morning."

Friday, June 23, 2017

Feeling in the Pink


Quinn is celebrating in her room, also known as The Temple of Pink, for National Pink Day. I think Daria would rather keep her distance from this one, but she might like National Columnists Day, considering that was her chosen profession in her future story from "Write Where It Hurts." Perhaps she could write a column about the homicidal urges triggered by the color pink?

Fandom News!

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

They Only Do the Fashionable Yoga Poses


The Fashion Club is getting surprisingly physical for International Yoga Day, but I suppose they've gotta work off those carrot sticks and diet soda somehow. Too bad Daria went off the air before the advent of selfies, or the girls would most certainly be posting pictures of themselves working out on social media for National Selfie Day. I think we're all grateful for that missed opportunity.

Fanfic Update!
  • 600 Years Afterward..... (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'I think it's a time capsule.' 'What's a time capsule?' 'Oh, it's some thing people did back in, uh, 19th, 20th century. You bury it for a few decades and they can see what the past was like. A no-tech Wayback.'"

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (parts 15 - 16b): "It was early June. The children were bored and restless behind their desks, even the better-behaved ones. It seemed like forever until the school bell rang in the later afternoon, but it finally did ring." (Part 16a) (Part 16b)

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 35b): "'Those were two of the assistants from the production team for Miss Betty and Sally M', Rod said in answer to the question Dylan had just asked him. 'I was giving them directions. Mr Chung's given them a room to work from.'"

  • The Gift (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "Daria sat down at the kitchen table next to her sister for breakfast like any other morning. Helen entered the kitchen glues to her phone per usual but stopped and was agape at what she saw."

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 6): "Daria walked into the building at 8:59 am. Hattie was waiting for her in the lobby. Looking at the clock on the wall Hattie exclaimed, 'Good Morning, Daria. You are the first one here. If the others aren't here in 6 minutes they will be out of the running. Are you ready to do some work today?'"

  • Magician's Code, by Crow-Black Dream (parts 1 - 5): "Charles 'Upchuck' Ruttheimer III was and always had been too poetic for most people. Partnered with flaming red curls and freckles peppering his large dimpled cheeks, this tendency toward speaking in flowery prose proved too much for any one of his peers for as long as he could remember, regardless of his inherent cheerful disposition." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)

  • A Silver Penny, by Shiva (parts 1 and 2): "'Oh, honey? Don't drink from that big bottle in the kitchen; it's silver nitrate.' Jane's father said from within the only bathroom in the house." (Part 2)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "'OK, students, settle down!' Ms. Li called from the podium. As the student body ignored her, she grew increasingly agitated, until finally snapping."

Monday, June 19, 2017

Kiss and Tell


Helen is having a hard time dealing with the fact that today is National Kissing Day, but I think she'll get over it. Honestly, she looks less like she's shocked and more like she's trying not to throw up. Daria and Tom might need to work on their technique.

Jake, meanwhile, is probably having a fantastic National Martini Day, and might even have taken the opportunity to make an entire pitcher, with or without a visit from Aunt Rita. Don't forget the olives, Jake!

Fandom News!

Saturday, June 17, 2017

Or You Could Holler at Your Vegetables


Jeffy's in it to win on National Hollerin' Contest Day, and while he's doing pretty well I think he's going to have a hard time defeating either Jake or Mr. DeMartino. Still, points for effort. I can't help but wonder if he's channeling a little bit of suppressed rage at Quinn right now.

Today is also Eat Your Vegetables Day. If you brought a bag of vegetables to the "Food in Film" Festival to throw at the screen during Andre Sakarynsky's Last Meal, then you might want to save a couple of them for a snack.

Fanfic Update!
  • Of Inhuman Bonding, by Kristen Bealer (part 2): "'What do you mean, you don't have it?' Jake demanded at the hotel check-in desk. 'One room, king-sized bed. Morgendorffer. "M" as in--' 'I've got this, Jake,' Helen said, stepping forward and gently guiding Jake to the side."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "This year's Lawndale High Talent Exhibition had been interesting to say the least. Everyone was still talking about Sandi Griffin's boarder-line X-rated Burlesque performance of The Scorpions' 'Rock You Like a Hurricane'."

Thursday, June 15, 2017

No Cookie is Worth THAT!


Okay, Daria, we get it. It's Smile Power Day. Now please, for all of our sakes, tone it down a few notches! You're freaking us all out here.

Today is also Global Wind Day and, fortunately, it's referring to the energy source and not Jane's oldest brother. I think the idea of multiple Wind Lanes all over the world is even more disturbing than Daria's smile.

Finally, on this day sixteen years ago, something significant happened in Angelinhel's story "61501." I'm not going to spoil it by telling you what it is, though!

Fandom News!

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

What's Cooking?


Jake's whipping up a special meal for National Kitchen Klutzes of America Day, but I don't think he'll have any takers to try it. I sense a pizza delivery order in the Morgendorffers' future. Don't worry, though, Jake; after turning your tongue black with Kitchen Sink Stew, the hot dog fiasco, and almost burning the kitchen down entirely, I think you've got the title all sewn up.

Fanfic Update!
  • Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 27): "As Carrie and Kira sat in yet another motel, they channel surfed, seeing the burning farm on every news channel."

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 35): "Lawndale High was the first school in the whole State with bomb-sniffing dogs. What a coup! That would help to cement Mr Chung's reputation."

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 5): "Back in the cubicle Daria worked on completing her piece about the paintball fieldtrip. Daria looked at the clock on her computer when she finished her work. There was about 15 minutes left until the deadline."

  • The More Things Change, by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 8): "I would love to tell you that, when I finally got to my apartment, I entered with all the vigor of victorious General and marched towards my destiny like the subject of a religious painting."

  • Of Inhuman Bonding, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "'God forbid I should count on anyone!' Jake raged at no one in particular, furious that Helen had backed out of going to the Eatertainment Conference with him."

  • That Bitter Memory (Hiding in Plain Sight (Alternate LLH, Plot Bunny to Kill)), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "The young woman - barely into her teens, with the occasional spot of acne and the lanky, awkward appearance of someone going through their growth spurt - brushed dirt from the sleeve of the painfully canary-yellow prison uniform she wore as she picked herself up from the ground."

  • Unnamed story (Hiding in Plain Sight (Alternate LLH, Plot Bunny to Kill)), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'This is what we live for,' Chief Petty Officer Morris said. 'We are facing the most dangerous game. This jabrone, whoever he is, he isn't facing some gun-toting thug. He's facing the Navy Seals. The best of the best.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 22): "Daria had told the Legion the prognosis on Bai Zheng. The plan was to depart at 5 pm and head back to the tower."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "'OK, class,' Lawndale's history teacher Alexander Jericho announced, 'We have a new student joining us today. Daria Morgendorffer, please raise your hand.'"

  • A Young Cynic's Mix (Black Daria), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "The woman finished putting sunscreen on a tow-headed boy of about five and directed him to play where she could see him. She stood up and smiled at Jake. 'So you're new in town? I'm Melody Ratzlaff.'"

Sunday, June 11, 2017

Aloha! I Mean, If That's Okay With You, Sandi


Stacy's got the moves for Kamehameha Day, a Hawaiian state holiday, but I think Sandi might have a few words for her on the subject of her fashion choices. Then again, after Stacy's turnabout at the magic show, she might keep her mouth shut on this one.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode Prize Fighters," which aired on this day in 2001. Daria, Jodie, and Upchuck compete for a scholarship while Jake finds a few hundred new ways to prepare hot dogs. Care for a wasabi gummy-fish imported from Tokyo?

Fandom News!

Friday, June 9, 2017

"All hail, Pippi Longstocking!"


Daria's reliving one of the least enjoyable moments of her life, as seen in the episode "Pinch Sitter," which aired on this day in 1997. It was a very educational episode: we learned about Jake's distaste for Couples Therapy Night, we used the word indemnification in a sentence, and we found out that Hitler ate sugar. Not to mention getting just a little too much information about Helen's personal life.

Fanfic Update!
  • Decisions, by elainefr (part 15): "My decision isn't meant to be malicious; I hope that you believe that. If anything, this decision is made out of complete and total pure love for all parties concerned... Look at you, so small, so perfect."

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 2): "'My Daria, you've been improving drastically,' Aunt Amy walked up to her niece who was practicing with Ted. Daria grapped with Ted as Amy watched. Finally, she managed to get a grip around Ted's waist and throw him to the floor."

  • Remote Control (Daria and the Gang Thread II), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'So, guess what?' Robert said. 'I'm going out with Quinn Morgendorffer.' Robert expected some congratulations, high fives, even balloons falling from the ceiling. They could have least rang a bell in his honor. Instead, his co-workers Roberto and Ross gave his a perplexed look."

  • That's awful, but is it art? (Iron Chef: Vulgarity), by tjdolf (COMPLETE!): "The scene is Da Foe's art class. Upchuck comes in, bringing a huge canvas in wrapping paper. The rest of the class are already there, painting away. He unwraps it and places it on an easel, away from the viewers."

  • Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 20 and 21): "'It would be interesting,' Jodie Landon said, 'to talk to a two-thousand year old man.' 'Yeah, I suppose so,' Jane said." (Part 21)

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

"Ding-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling? A-ling?"


Mack doesn't seem to be enjoying National Chocolate Ice Cream Day, but it might just be because that appears to be strawberry. Don't worry, though, in a few years he'll team up with Kevin to make millions on Bro and QB's Firstdown Fudge.

But looking back at the past, today is the anniversary of Beau Brummell's birth in 1778. Brummell's upper class status, good looks, and fashion sense would probably have the Fashion Club swooning, but I'm afraid the age difference is a little too insurmountable.

Fandom News!

Monday, June 5, 2017

Economists and Environmentalists


Mrs. Bennett just asked the class what economist was born today, and it's a trick question because there are two of them: Adam Smith in 1723 and John Maynard Keynes in 1883. The real trick, of course, is that practically no one in that classroom has ever heard of either of them.

Today is also World Environment Day, so, you know, don't pollute or anything. After all, "fashion is fun and everything, but we should really do something about the rainforest and stuff."

Fanfic Update!
  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 4): "Mr. Bergen's office was in stark contrast to the rest of the building. It was large and clearly he liked leather furniture. His taste also included oriental rugs and antiques – and not antiques as in old half-broken office furniture!"

  • The More Things Change (Iron Chef: The New Canon), by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 8): "Back in the Bronx, Brittany was ordering the two of us food and simultaneously calling up to Kevin to make sure everything was alright with him and the kids."

  • A.R.C CHAPTER 9 Babysitting, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Shortly after dinnertime the phone rang at the Hecuba home. 'I got it, this must be Daria.' Andrea said before answering the phone."

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Captain Marbles (COMPLETE!): "Jane was flying through the air in that super outfit from her fifth season alter egos as the announcer's voice filled the air:"

  • Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "The four girls, two of whom were feathered, walked into the building. Despite the tree growing through the center, the walls were still lined with bookshelves, all of which were filled."

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Happy Happy Birthday Birthday, Ginsberg Ginsberg!


So, this blog post was supposed to be posted yesterday. I'd like to give you an exciting explanation involving ninjas and bare-knuckled fistfights, but the reality is that I just forgot about it. So, just pretend that you're reading this yesterday. It's a very special time-travel episode of the Daria Fandom Blog!

Daria's doing a special reading of "Howl" in honor of Allen Ginsberg's birth on this day in 1926, but it's not going over so well. Maybe if she threw in some Melody Powers references it would be better received.

I don't think she should try reading it a second time, even though today is National Repeat Day. Instead, she should join Jane in a nice round of echolalia. Echolalia.

Fandom News!

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Got Milk?


Jake's going all out for World Milk Day, but I hope he doesn't spill it. Not because I'm worried he'll cry over it (although he might), but because I fear he'll set the kitchen on fire again if he tries to clean it up.

Also on this day in 1997, The Washington Post published an article about Daria. It's an interesting look at the show from the early days, and if you haven't read it yet I recommend it.

Fanfic Update!
  • And You Are? (Iron Chef : Daria and Helen have the same age), by neonhomer (part 1): "Helen Morgendorffer sat at her desk as she was shuffling papers into order. 'Oh sure Eric, I'll be more than happy to come in late and finish the Hansen case.' She said aloud."

  • Division I Recruiting, by Brother Grimace (part 1): "Mack Mackenzie glanced over at the pretty, light-skinned Black girl with the mass of shaggy, brownish hair tied back into a heavy ponytail. He noted that her friends kept turning her back towards him and the cadet beside him, and her blush kept getting deeper each time she made eye contact with him."

  • The Interview, by dmsfanman (part 3): "In the conference area Hattie was setting up submarine sandwiches on a long side table. She had brought the sandwiches in from a nearby deli. A couple of the other writers were already there and looking over Hattie's shoulder."

  • No Bad Deed Goes Unrewarded (Iron Chef: Mack's Dark Side), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Mack was fuming as he walked to school. How dare she? he thought as he stormed down the street. It's bad enough that she decided to dump me completely out of nowhere, but over the phone? First thing in the morning? She couldn't even wait another hour to tell me to my face?"

  • On The Road, by elainefr (part 42): "'I really wish that you hadn't gone there Quinn,' Stacey told her over the phone. 'Max has enough going on- with the tour- and stuff.'"

  • Tyranny of Evil Men (Iron Chef: Mack's Dark Side), by Two-Eyed Charlie (COMPLETE!): "Mack pushed open the door of Lawndale's lone Blockbuster, a VHS copy of Muppet Treasure Island tucked under his arm, and quietly made his way to the return slot."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "Far away in some medieval Fantasy setting. 'So let me get this straight....' Jane muttered turning to Daria and Tom."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "'Good news, everybody!' Jane yelled to the gathered Daria cast. 'We're getting a new show!' 'What? That's amazing!' Jake said. 'When! Where!'"

  • What really happened to Tommy Sherman (Iron Chef: Mack's Dark Side), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "Tommy Sherman laid at the base of goal post in Lawndale's stadium barely conscious with the detached goal laying nearby. He had hit it going all out like many times in the past during his glorious high school career, however he never expected it to break like it did."