Thursday, February 21, 2019

Cards and Cars


Tiffany's ready to tell your future for Card Reading Day, but I don't think any of us would live long enough to get through an entire tarot reading at her pace. Still, she'd make a fortune if the phone hotline charges by the minute.

Stacy's Is It College Yet? alter ego will also enjoy today, because it's also the anniversary of NASCAR! I have no idea how Future Stacy might end up a racecar driver, but I suppose anything that pisses off Sandi would be fine by her.

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 20): "'So how's the writing coming along?' Jane asked Daria, who was visiting and typing away on Jane's used electric typewriter."

  • The Crooked Smile, by YouthofOz (parts 1 - 3): "(Lawndale High hallway. Students are leaving their classes at the end of the day.) JANE: You know, they say when you're born, you only have a finite amount of heartbeats left." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Daria The Temptress, by WildDogJJ (part 3 and 4): "Around noon Jane woke up with a headache and a mild case of nausea. Damn hangover!" (Part 4)

  • Freefall, by atiyatortilla (part 5): "Jamie sat in the car for fifteen minutes before he finally cut the engine."

  • The Janes Must Be Crazy!, by TheBrodsterBoy (COMPLETE!): "It was a dark night. Jane paced around, carefully thinking to herself."

  • Life That Dare Not Speak Its Name, by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "It was odd having Daria and Jane following them around, filming them. Sandi felt like she was on the defensive, justifying their empty actions and hollow routines - okay, the Fashion Club wasn't curing diseases and stopping wars but they were having fun." (Part 15) (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 19) (Part 20) (Part 21) (Part 22)

  • No Rain, by Lady Evil (part 35): "'Those are some nice flowers.' said Dr. Becky. 'Thanks.' said Daria. 'Trent gave them to me.' 'That friend of yours?' 'We're not friends.'"

  • The Other Foot, by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "'There you go, Miss Morgendorffer,' said the teacher as he handed over the form. 'It'll only take a minute.'" (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

  • Rude Awakening: The Cynical Ones Could See That Coming!, by DIsaac (part 1): "There are things in life that are so obvious. To the point that if anyone pays attention to what is happening that would get it with immediate effect!"

Tuesday, February 19, 2019

Heliocentrism is Reeeeeeally Shiiiiiny....


I would say that Tiffany is helping us celebrate Nicolaus Copernicus's birth on this day in 1473, but I don't think she even knows who that is. Indeed, the idea that the universe revolves around anything that isn't Tiffany is probably too much for her brain to handle.

This is also the anniversary of the episode "Fizz Ed" in 2001, which contains one of the greatest Daria moments in history: Ms. Li's axe-wielding breakdown. It really doesn't get much better than that.

Fandom News!

Sunday, February 17, 2019

It's Not Over Until the Butterfly Sings!


Daria seems to have gotten a little confused about the anniversary of Madama Butterfly on this day in 1904. Of course, if you'd like to join Mr. DeMartino in the automotive department, the Payday performance of the opera will begin shortly.

Speaking of singing, this is also the anniversary of the episode "Daria!" in 1999. None of the singing was exactly opera-quality, but we did get to hear Jake rhyme "Lexus" and "solar plexus." Try topping that, Puccini!

Today is also Michael Jordan's 56th birthday, and I'm sure Mack's father is happy about the occasion. Mack's feelings are likely less enthusiastic, given the grief he's had to endure over his middle name.

Fanfic Update!
  • Changing Lanes, by midnightabyss86 (part 19): "Stacy squinted her eyes in annoyance, as she finished her practice exam."

  • Daria's Great Adventure, by dmsfanman (part 20): "Anton sat at the conference table in his wheelchair. Also present were Mia, Erwin, and the others who had interrogated the prisoners."

  • Daria the Invincible, by TheBrodsterBoy (part 2): "'So, run this one past me one more time amiga?' When Daria had called Jane on the phone, telling her she was indestructible and was gonna profit off it, Jane wasn't quite sure what to think."

  • Daria The Temptress, by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "It was a sunny Sunday afternoon on the North End of Downtown Boston." (Part 2)

  • Edicius, by elainefr (part 13): "'Tom?' 'Thought you might want some dessert.' He held up the doughnut laden bag. She smiled and allowed him entry. He handed her the bag and kissed her on the cheek as he came in."

  • The Greasy Fry (Daria and the Gang Thread II), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'You know Jodie,' Quinn said, 'the funny thing is that I wasn't always an intellectual.' 'I suspected as such,' Jodie said. 'You always seemed to be a bit too put together.'"

  • Life At First Sight, by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "Sandi Griffin didn't believe in love at first sight. It was a stupid idea. Yes, you could want something when you first saw it, or like it. But love? You couldn't love something right away." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13)

  • Life That Dare Not Speak Its Name, by YouthofOz (parts 1 - 3): "It was two weeks since the paintball fiasco." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Reason Awakens (Iron Chef: Four Post Fashion Scenarios), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "In the short history of the Fashion Club at Lawndale High many teenage boys had marvelled at the shortness of chief accessory officer Tiffany Blum-Deckler's mini-skirts even as many teenage girls whispered behind her back about the length of leg Tiffany was disposed to expose to assay the limits of Lawndale's lax dress code."

  • A spring afternoon (Iron Chef: The Return of 7 item list story game AKA CHOPPED: PPMB STYLE), by JPAGC (part 2): "There was no sign of Jake when Daria and Jane passed through the foyer, though the mess of card boxes and wrapping styrofoam remained. Jen went directly into the kitchen, opened a cupboard an took out two mugs."

  • Switch (Extended Play mix), by frogfarm (COMPLETE!): "MORGENDORFFER KITCHEN, the evening of the concert. HELEN is rapidly shuffling through paperwork and stuffing it into a briefcase. JANE-in-DARIA stands at the counter with her, looking flummoxed. Also slightly more arty than usual, in a tie-dyed shirt and hip hugger jeans."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 169): "It had been a long meeting, and the members of Chapter One were in a morose mood. Sandi knew it, and she hadn't gotten to the big news yet."

  • Winter Is Coming, by Meester_Lee (part 12): "That might have been the highlight of Friday evening at Schloss Morgendorffer except that the phone rang as the Morgendorffers were finishing up dinner—a mixture of home-cooked vegetables and pre-cooked roast chicken that Helen had picked up from Lloyd's."

Friday, February 15, 2019

Daria, Look Out! He's RIGHT BEHIND YOU!


It's Singles Awareness Day, and Daria is all too aware of her singleness right now. Of course, before long it'll be Jane's turn to be single and by the end of the series all three of them will be.

You know, I have a better idea. How about everyone just celebrates one of my favorite holidays, Half-Priced Candy Day? Much less depressing, plus there's candy. Everybody wins!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, February 13, 2019

Who Wants a Freeeeee T-Shirt?!


Don't look now, but Bing and/or the Spatula Man is gearing up for World Radio Day, even though literally everyone wishes he wouldn't. If you'd like some good radio, check out "Free Radio Lawndale" by Ken Tremberth and Erin Mills. It's unfinished (pitchfork jab), but a fun read.

I doubt it would help their act, but the Z-93 duo might benefit from better nicknames. If so, this is the day for it, because today is also Get a Different Name Day. In the wise words of Jake Morgendorffer, "Then you walk away. You change your name, move to another state, get some ID. It's not too late to start over, Daria, it's not too late! You're still a young man! You don't have to live with your mistakes! Get out while you can!"

Dibs on "Esmeralda."

Fanfic Update!
  • A Big Slice of Trouble! (Iron Chef: Drug Front Pizza), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Tiffany, dear, are you sure this video you saw was accurate?' Sandi asked. 'Yeahhhh, Sandi,' Tiffany assured her one-time leader. 'Mom and Dad say Alex Jones is the smartest man on the Internet.'"

  • Daria's Makeover, by Meester_Lee (parts 4 and 5): "Her first stop after passing through the door was the security checkpoint, which today was held by a pair of oversized fence lizards. They scanned her ID and let her pass through." (Part 5)

  • Fatal Distraction (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Sandi is watching TV in the living room when the doorbell rings. She gets up to answer. It's Lisa. 'Hi, Sandi.' Sandi said 'Hey, Lisa.' 'Can we talk?' 'Sure.'"

  • Freefall, by atiyatortilla (part 4): "Friday arrived and with it came the news of Quinn's disappearance."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 169): "5 am. The alarm went off in Tiffany Blum-Deckler's apartment near the campus of Nova Vitae."

  • When I Grow Up, by Lady Evil (COMPLETE!): "Sister Martin had her Kindergartners gathered in a circle for Circle Time. 'Alright, boys and girls,' she said gently. 'Today, I want to teach you a new word. It's "vocation". Can you say "vocation"?'"

  • Winter Is Coming, by Meester_Lee (part 11): "The school week ended and everybody was exhausted, despite the fact that Lawndale High's remaining roofing remain in place. Daria and Quinn got picked up after school while Jane remained behind for practice."

Monday, February 11, 2019

"Beautiful, beautiful tryptophane!"


It may be Don't Cry over Spilled Milk Day, but it looks like Jake is neither spilling milk nor crying. Which is good, because the last time he spilled milk he nearly burned the entire house down.

Today is also National Inventors Day, so if there's a gadget you think the world needs then you'd better get cracking. Andrew Landon would like to remind everyone that "folding coffee cup" is already taken.

Fandom News!

Saturday, February 9, 2019

Anyone For Metal Dentures?


Mr. DeMartino appears to be observing Toothache Day, although I'm sure he'd rather not be. Also, given a choice between a toothache and putting up with Mr. O'Neill, I think I'd just live with the toothache.

In happier news, today is also National Pizza Day. If you need help figuring out how to celebrate this one, you don't deserve to call yourself a Daria fan.

Fanfic Update!
  • Beware the Fan that Feeds You (Iron Chef: Fictional Reaction), by TheBrodsterBoy (part 2): "'Smiley, don't tell me you broke the non canonizer?' 'Sorry Man, I'm not sure if turning that thing is on is a good idea. Have you seen some of the stuff in the Daria fandom multiverse?'"

  • Bye the Way (Iron Chef: We Were Young, Once), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "It had been four years of blood and sweat, and sometimes the blood wasn't no metaphor."

  • Cards (IC: Daria Meets God), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked at the business card and read it. Name: God Age: None Occupation: See Name 'Have card, will travel, service with a smile!'"

  • Comeuppance (Iron Chef: The Return of 7 item list story game AKA CHOPPED: PPMB STYLE), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "Everything in Linda Griffin's life has had one simple goal, Not to make herself look bad to anyone. By anyone she meant everyone. Her family, Her co-workers, Her Friends. So it was a shock to be here at her funeral today."

  • Daria's Makeover, by Meester_Lee (parts 1 - 3): "'And here we are,' said Jane. 'So this is Scarlett's house?' said Daria, raising her eyebrows skeptically. 'This is the place,' said Jane. She pressed the doorbell." (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Daria the Invincible, by TheBrodsterBoy (part 1): "Dear Diary, I used to be Daria Morgendorffer, from Lawndale Pennsylvania. I am a 18 year old girl, and I thought that was all. Up until about a few months ago, I thought I was just a normal girl. Cynical, Sarcastic,....well, perhaps not normal, but nothing special."

  • Fatal Distraction (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "Michael Jordan MacKenzie is at the bar checking out the ladies. One woman catches his eye. This woman is a beautiful brunette wearing a sexy yet tasteful red evening dress that accentuates her curves. She walks up to the bar and orders a drink." (Part 2)

  • Freefall, by atiyatortilla (parts 2 and 3): "The last day of Quinn's life was the beginning of a new chapter in Jamie's." (Part 3)

  • Right In The Genes (Iron Chef: The Daria Gene), by nightbeast37 (part 1): "The mood was tense inside the Morgendorffer household. Daria had been left with such news that would've just about surprised anybody who didn't see the world the way she saw it."

  • A spring afternoon (Iron Chef: The Return of 7 item list story game AKA CHOPPED: PPMB STYLE), by JPAGC (part 1): "The early Spring afternoon was one of clear skies and unblocked Sun, a promise of the future warm days, just after the cold of the recent Winter."

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Brother Grimace and Roentgen (part 166 - 168): "'The sleek, silky catamount inches closer down the partial path along the beautiful, hilly Southern California landscape - sliding past littered branches and moving over broken rock and loose soil with unwavering skill towards her unsuspecting prey,' Rossalyn monologued in her own mind as she approached Greg from behind, a wraith composed of active psychoplasmic energies invisible to the naked eye and unnoticed by the still-chuckling student, Esra's jacket still in hand." (Part 167) (Part 168)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "Football, it had to be said, wasn't this big in Texas. When Highland High or the Cowboys won, the residents had never rioted, looted, and generally caused the kind of havoc that required the Maryland National Guard to be called in."

Thursday, February 7, 2019

Let Me Guess Who Came Up With This Holiday....


I see Quinn's friends have been celebrating Send a Card to a Friend Day, unless those are all just cheerful death threats from Sandi. I suppose Stacy is still giving away her cards for free, because I don't think she has the backbone to try to charge anyone for them.

Today is also the anniversary of Laura Ingalls Wilder's birth on this day in 1867. She wrote the Little House books, which were referenced twice on the show: once when Travis stole a story from the TV show based on the books in "Speedtrapped," and again when Jane referred to Earl and Barbara as "Little Hell on the Prairie."

Fandom News!

Tuesday, February 5, 2019

Turns Out Science DOES Know a Few Things, Quinn!


Let's wish the Al Roker look-a-like from "Daria!" a happy National Weatherperson's Day, and hope that people are more willing to listen to him the next time he predicts a hurricane. If nothing else, a crisis may be averted when Daria and Jane don't end up trapped in close quarters with Brittany and Kevin.

Fanfic Update!
  • Burning Ambition (IC: Song based stories), by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "Sandi Griffin stopped punching her pillow. It wasn't fighting back nor screaming in pain, so punching it wasn't doing anything for her."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 54): "Daria put aside her bad dream and tried to come to grips with another irritant: Valentine's Day."

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 18): "Erin's phone rang. Answering she heard Michelle's frantic voice. 'Erin. Are you there?' 'Yes, Michelle. What's the matter?' 'Gregor. It's Gregor. He's been trying to call you. But he only has your desk number.'"

  • Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 26): "'So, Mr. DeMartino, how did you end up in this location?' asked Upchuck. Both Beavis and Butt-head looked at each other and then towards DeMartino. The two of them had no idea who the older man was but given how Upchuck seemed to know who he was, they were somewhat willing to listen."

  • Fifteen minutes (IC: Random Alter-Ego Tales), by tjdolf (COMPLETE!): "(The usual suspects are in Jane's room as usual, Jane is painting a wheelbarrow green with pink flowers, Daria is reading Art News.) Jane: This hippie style is not for me."

  • Fire In My Hole (IC: Song based stories), by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "Jane had started work early that morning, even before daybreak. It was going to be 45 degrees in the shade today according to the weather forecasts and she had to take advantage of that - at least before the weather took advantage of her."

  • No Rain (continuation of Thank U), by Lady Evil (part 34): "Goddammit, Trent! Jane thought as she lay in bed and listened to her brother's radio show. What possessed you to play hits from the 80's?"

  • Unnamed story (IC: Daria Meets God), by Dark Kuno (COMPLETE!): "Hovering 10,000 feet in the air, she looked down on the squad of enemy soldiers a thousand feet below her on their flight sleds."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Ghost in the Skull), by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "Melody regarded the document in her hands keeping her new face neutral. If these writings were what they thought she was, she was facing someone who knew her every last trick and gambit."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Return of 7 item list story game AKA CHOPPED: PPMB STYLE), by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "'Hmmm. Anchovies. How utterly wonderful. The day was going really badly but now? Oh, let joy be unconfined.'"

  • Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Brother Grimace (parts 164 and 165): "Jaime walked into 'Homeroom' - so nicknamed because it somehow became the place where the students at the Legion Academy gravitated towards after breakfast and before classes - and looked around." (Part 165)

  • You Know You've Done Something Wrong, by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "Jane very cautiously approaches Sandi and prods her shoulder. Seems real enough, as does the withering look Sandi shoots Jane for her presumption." (Part 37) (Part 38) (Part 39) (Part 40) (Part 41) (Part 42) (Part 43) (Part 44) (Part 45) (Part 46) (Part 47)

Sunday, February 3, 2019

A Holiday for the Birds


While I'm glad that Helen is so enthusiastic about Feed the Birds Day, I really don't think she needed to take it quite that far. Jake seems to appreciate it, though, so I guess it's all good.

In other news, today is the day of the Super Bowl, so go, teams, go! If Super Bowls aren't your thing, I'm sure you can find an exciting school review meeting to attend instead.

Fandom News!

Friday, February 1, 2019

Mmm...ABC Gum!


Grant Clinton has a special treat for us all to celebrate Bubble Gum Day! I don't actually recommend trying it, though--it's already been chewed by Ted, and I don't think anyone wants kook germs. I hear it's contagious!

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (parts 52 and 53): "It was her second Christmas as Mistress of the Black family townhouse at Grimmauld Place. Even after over a year and a half after learning that she was its owner, Daria sometimes still had difficulty accepting that she owned it." (Part 53)

  • Edicius, by elainefr (part 11): "'Thanks for everything but you've got to stop.' He looked at her. And she thought, perhaps he didn't know what he was doing. Maybe it was an unconscious need to protect and for that she was truly grateful."

  • The Heavy Duty (Iron Chef: Drug Front Pizza), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "JANE: So do you remember that night when we didn't order from Pizza King? DARIA: Ohhhh. I remember that night!"

  • Thank U, by Lady Evil (part 33): "Well, here I am. Jane thought. Back at Pizza Forrest. She was nursing a Coke as she sketched Schizo Squirrel dressed like Sammy Squirrel. That was a mind screw, Schizo trying to be another squirrel for once."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Daria Gene), by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "Daria listened patiently while the very-excited-looking medical practitioner concluding his oh-so-credible speech."

  • Upper Crass (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Tom is showing his study to Chan. Chan is visibly impressed by the volume of books. 'You well read, Tom.' Tom said 'Thanks, Chan. I try.'" (Part 3)

  • Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 18): "Erin ended another unsuccessful phone call and looked at her watch. Three Thirty-Five. Is there enough time left?"

  • Transaction Complete (Daria and the Gang), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Bart and Milhouse virtually sprinted to The Android's Dungeon."

  • You Know You've Done Something Wrong, by YouthofOz (part 16 - 35): "My turn already? Oh, I was rather enjoying that. I was looking forward to the witty repartee of the three girls on the bus. If they take the bus." (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20) (Part 21) (Part 22) () (Part 24) (Part 25) (Part 26) (Part 27) (Part 28) (Part 29) (Part 30) (Part 31) (Part 32) (Part 33) (Part 34) (Part 35)