Bang!

Something tells me Daria's not really that into Pistol Patent Day, but that may just be because the specific pistol is pink. I wouldn't want to touch that with my bare hands, either.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Partner's Complaint," which aired on this day in 2000. No pistols were involved, and considering how many people lost their tempers it's probably a good thing.

Fanfic Update!

• A Criminalé Summer, by LadySparrow (COMPLETE!): "Jane called Daria soon after getting off the phone with Tom, and gave her the update on the fire’s investigation."


• Daria: Spin the Bottle, by Meester_Lee (parts 4 and 5): "Daria lay flat on her back and staring at the ceiling. Hellfire and damnation, she thought. I thought I left all that crap behind when I left Highland, and here it is coming back to smack me in the face." (Part 4)


• Doctor Who - Changes in Time and Space, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "'Unscheduled off world activation!' Sgt. Harriman called out as the gate activated. 'Closing the Iris.' The Iris closed."


• Lawndale Homecoming, by LadySparrow (parts 1 - 3): "Daria looked outside her apartment window in New York on a Tuesday afternoon, as she pulled the last cigarette out of its pack and lit it up." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Lawndale Splendor, by Two-Eyed Charlie (COMPLETE!): "NOTE FOR HIERONYMUS BOSCH: All right Jane, here we go. First new script in a while but...well, you'll see why."


• Made in America, by ladyevil (part 9): "Alfred woke up at five in the morning to the ringing of his phone. 'Hello?' He grumbled, having answered with his eyes closed."


• The Youngest Barksdale (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "Daria arrived at Lawndale High twenty minutes before homeroom. It was larger than her old school, but then that was a rather small (and exclusive) school."

Aw, Shoot!

As if anyone needed one more excuse to avoid Upchuck, now he's packing heat to celebrate Pistol Patent Day, or the anniversary of the day Samuel Colt patented the revolver in 1836. Without that weapon, Daria could not have been accidentally framed for Kevin's murder in her dream sequence and--you know what? I'm going to stop now before that sentence gets any weirder.

In other news, today is also the anniversary of the episode "Partner's Complaint" in 2000. Jane and Daria made their peace over Jane dating Tom, but if only they'd known how much worse things could get. I guess we should be glad they didn't have any revolvers, huh?

Fanfic Update!

• The Crooked Smile, by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "(Daria and Jane walk to school. Daria hums happily to herself, skipping as she walks.) JANE: I'm surprised you're even getting out of bed. Or using a toilet properly." (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16)


• Daria's Makeover, by Meester_Lee (part 6): "Daria presented her note to the school nurse and got an endorsement excusing her from PE. After that, it was back to classes. Her afternoon was—different."


• Daria The Temptress, by WildDogJJ (parts 5 and 6): "Daria and her boyfriend, Paul, were relaxing in the apartment she and Jane shared. They sat on the couch watching TV." (Part 6)


• The Date, by elainefr (part 8): "Daria lay on her back looking up at the ceiling of her room. Things were going well for her on all fronts."


• Freefall, by atiyatortilla (part 6): "It was 2:00 in the morning when the rousing chorus of ‘It's Gonna Be Me' startled Tori awake. She nearly fell from the couch as she scrambled to locate her silver flip phone."


• Home, by Rémi (part 4): "A bookshop in Lawndale. Daria and Quinn are searching the sets of shelves, picking books as they do."


• Journey into Misery, by Captain Marbles (parts 1 and 2): "Daria awoke to the grating sound of pop music coming from her sister's cell phone. She wondered for the umpteenth time what had possessed her to come along on this family retreat to Norway, of all places - then she remembered." (Part 2)


• Life Is A Four-Letter Word, by YouthofOz (part 1): "Quinn Morgendorffer was good at not thinking about troublesome things. It was a brilliant skill that let her compartmentalize life, focusing life into certain areas where it was best needed."


• Right in the Genes (Iron Chef: The Daria Gene), by nightbeast37 (COMPLETE!): "Helen, Jake and Daria literally rushed inside the doctor's building just to have a 'little talk' with him. Jake was still quite skeptic on Daria having her own gene, so he felt that if he talked to the doctor about it, they could sort it out once and for all."


• A Spring Afternoon, by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "Later, Daria, alone in her room, worked on another problem. This time it regarded strings attached to weights and how much potential and kinetic energy was being displayed."


• Together, by atiyatortilla (part 1): "From a young age, Tom realized that his life had already been mapped out for him."


• You Want It Darker, by MedusaLSM (part 6): "At the weekend she was moving in with Daria for a while, volunteering as catsitter to Godzilla so Daria wouldn't have to keep dragging her ass across the city to babysit Jane at night then return to her actual dependent in the afternoons."

Guns and Guardian Angels

Upchuck is using very dramatic means to wish Samuel Colt, the inventor who made mass production of the revolver possible, a happy birthday. This may be a dubious honor, but think of it this way: without the revolver, Daria wouldn't have found that pink gun in her locker in "Murder, She Snored," and the episode would not have been created!

Huh. I'm not sure if I made a point for or against there.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Groped by an Angel," which aired on this day in 2000. No revolvers featured in that episode, but Quinn almost got crushed by a falling lamp and later completely ruined her new jeans, so that was pretty fun, right?

Fanfic Update!

• 5 Fanfics that Daria Morgendorffer Bookmarked (And One She Didn't), by Blake C Stacey (BlakeStacey) (parts 1 and 2): "'And you promise me that this is actually a thing people do to food?' Jane sent an eyebrow as high as it could go, fixing an inquisitive, perhaps slightly accusatory stare upon Daria." (Part 2)


• Everyone Needs a Stereotype, by YumeSin (COMPLETE!): "'This one?' asked Jane, showing Daria her old lady and the Tiger painting. They had been picking out things to hang in their dorms, cross checking with each other if it had been good enough to hang on a wall that was most likely going to be puked upon by their drunken roommates."


• Interview Powers (Iron Chef - the Raft Interview), by tjdolf (COMPLETE!): "The Bromwell interview had been shaky, but for the Raft interview she was mentally prepared. Trying to be. She knew what she was supposed to do. Pretty much."


• The More Things Change (Iron Chef: The New Canon), by Two-Eyed Charlie (parts 17 and 18): "There was shouting again, exactly like when I rode the elevator up to Jane's apartment. And like at Jane's apartment, the origin of the commotion just so happened to be exactly where I was going." (Part 18)


• Morning Run, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, Mackenzie.' 'Hey, Carlyle.' Julia smiled as she kept pace with him as they jogged along the length of the quarry beach below where Legion Tower stood, the reddish-orange light of the half-risen sun casting long shadows as they ran."


• Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 28): "Daria and Jane were watching TV during a combined 'fun run'. It was a fun run because each was wearing a sensor array and each of them were running on an uphill treadmill and wearing pressurized masks that could change the atmospheres they breathed as they ran."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by Sureia (COMPLETE!): "'Well? What did you do with the potion?' Quinn the Enigma shrugged, shuffling her feet awkwardly as the druid council stared at her in silent and occasionally tittering judgement."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward.....), by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "One afternoon, during Road Worrier, Jane and Daria were standing next to a field. 'What is Jessie doing?'"


• Unnamed story (World's Medium-Sized Crossover), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Mack and Stacy were sitting in a bar. It had been a long time since either of them were in high school, but Mack had that sinking feeling. He had been her boyfriend for four years and he felt that he had paid for it, sometimes in blood."

Rrrrr...Draw!

It's Pistol Patent Day, the anniversary of the day Samuel Colt patented his revolver in 1836. I'm not sure if Upchuck with a gun is scarier than Upchuck without one, but I'd feel better if he wiped that cheesy grin off his face.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Partner's Complaint," which first aired on this day in 2000. I think Jane should be glad Daria wasn't carrying a pistol when she kept going on about Tom, although they did work things out in the end. Without pistols, I mean--although that could be a fun AU fic.

Fanfic Update!

• Acquainted (Ideas!), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "The brisk wind hit Daria Morgendorffer full force as she rushed from the parking lot, the icy chill tearing through her auburn hair as she hugged her gray peacoat closer to her body."


• Action Stories #6: Struck by Lightning, by NightGoblyn (parts 1 - 3): "'Ugh,' Quinn said, wrapping her arms around herself. 'Out of the fire and into the icebox.' She pulled out her Legion phone and powered it up, frowning at the small 'no service' icon." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Invader Quinn Season Three, by Anguirus1955 (part 1): "'No! NOOO!!! You'll pay for this,' Miss Bitters said into the phone. 'Well, students, despite my moral outrage, Principal Li is allowing you all to celebrate Valentine's Day today,' Miss Bitters said to her class with clear distaste in her voice."


• Take a Walk in my Shoes, by DIsaac (part 5): "To say it was a normal at Lawndale High the day after that shooting star was a flat out lie. Things were Topsy Turvy."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef : MMORPG, Lawndale style), by Waylander (part 14): "Darlene wasn't sure what to expect as she approached the wrought-iron gates of the Old Cemetery. Was it going to be infested with zombies? Or she was supposed to find a passage to a secret dungeon in one of the old crypts?"

Put 'Em Up!

Happy Pistol Patent Day! This holiday celebrates the anniversary of Samuel Colt patenting his "revolving gun." Daria is thrilled, I'm sure.

Today is also the anniversary of the airing of "Partner's Complaint" in 2000. Daria and Jane work on a class project with different people because they're mad at each other over Tom. I think a pistol would have made the whole argument much simpler.

Fanfic Update!

• Agreement (IC: Criminals of Lawndale), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'You're wrong.' 'Oh, I don't think anyone wants to hear any more self-righteous—' 'No, I mean you're wrong that I didn't plan to fight,' interrupted Daria."


• As Though She Had Done It All Before..., by Shiva (part 4): "But sleep didn't come right away. Instead Daria found herself in a lucid state between being awake and dreamland. Strange flashes and images began to fly in her dimming vision once more, but they were all much to quick to make any sense. Then sleep claimed her."


• A Cynical Earth, by RLobinske (part 5): "Cheerfully, the Doctor circled around the center console, operating controls seemingly at random. 'Next stop, Piccadilly Station.' Teasing, Dorothy said, 'Are you sure we'll get there, Professor?' 'Have I ever arrived at the wrong location?' 'Frequently.'"


• The Dale of Lawn, by Wassersauefer (part 12): "'You actually plan on besieging them?', she asked with a deadpan voice. 'Yes', answered the brown haired overlord without turning around. Silence followed as the others seemed to wait for an explanation but she gave none."


• DW: The Many Doctors, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 13): "'So, Felicia is in an earlier version of the TARDIS?' Jia'hale (now dry but still au naturale) asked as she entered the console room. The Doctor pointedly made eye contact with Jia'hale as he said. 'Yes, she is. Now we need to find out which earlier version.'"


• Freewheelin', by peetz5050 (part 16): "'Quinn was talking about how you changed, you know, since your accident of course but even since you came to Lawndale, she says you used to avoid people before and stayed on your own but you seem friendly enough to me. Were you really that... I don't know, what's the word? Not lonely but.. a loner, were you a loner?'"


• Free Will (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Okay, Jodie. Let's use a test subject to see which of us is right. Brittany, you believe in the laws of science, right?'"


• The Game of Six, by Erin M. (prologue): "Celestia smiled and let out a small sigh of contentment. Yes, things were going to change now that Twilight Sparkle was a princess. The ivory alicorn was certain her faithful student would have questions needing answers soon enough."


• Hanami, by Staticblast (COMPLETE!): "Life had become very cold for him. His love had left him, traveled to a place he could not yet follow."


• Heroes and Villains Part Three: The Madness of Quinn Morgendorffer, by Reven384 (parts 1 and 2): "Daria watched as the feed cut to what was on the tape. It was her sister! Daria stood up and had to fight her elation at finding out her sister was alive. What happened next would turn that elation into nausea." (Part 2)


• Heroes: The Dark Side Of The Moon, by Brother Grimace (part 1): "WAYNE JOHNSON lies asleep in a recliner, a HUGE terrycloth robe wrapped around him like a blanket. Black, in his mid-thirties, there is a look of peace on his painfully ordinary face."


• Lost in Translation (Scenes No Daria Fanfic should have: Delightful and Naughty), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'The school received a call this morning from a Mrs. Johanssen,' started Ms. Li. 'She said...WHO THE HELL IS THAT?' The duo turned around to follow her eyes. There was a tall, bald man, who looked somewhat like Keegan-Michael Key."


• Mack the Esteemer, by Shiva (part 17): "'Heh,' Jodie laughed out loud, 'When I told Rachel she'd have to fight for her independence, I'd didn't think she'd have to do it so quickly.'"


• Mine (Iron Chef: Fresh takes on Veronica Morgendorffer), by Vukodlak (part 1): "Jane opened Daria's door and her mouth hung open with shock. If Jane hadn't seen it with our own eyes she'd never have believed it. There was Daria cradling her baby sister Veronica in a carrier sling gently rocking her back and forth and cooing at her."


• A New Man, by SinisterExaggerator (part 2): "He eased himself out of bed and picked up the phone. A gruff voice greeted him on the other end, with a jaded color that could only belong to a newspaper editor. 'Uh, Morgendorffer...I've kinda got some bad news. Well, for you.'"


• Of Hearts and Minds Book II: Present, by mac (part 3): "Quinn was almost power-walking as she sped out of the cafeteria, the news she just heard repeating in her mind. Daria and Kevin are working together on a project. I'll need to wait a few days, let some time pass, then use this to my advantage."


• Sexy Daria: The Misery Sex, by Shiva (part 2): "Jane smirked as she and Scarlett got comfortable on the floor nearby. 'Well,' Jane began to explain, 'Tommy Sherman was the Quarterback that won the State Championship about three years ago for our school.'"


• Tom and Quinn Have a Little Chat... (Scenes No Daria Fanfic should have: Delightful and Naughty), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "While waiting for Daria to come downstairs, Tom Sloane found himself sitting next to his girlfriend's sister, Quinn. He decided to break the fourth wall by asking, 'I wonder why there aren't more fanfics of us as a couple."


• Unnamed story (Another bit on my Addams crossover), by Ranger Thorne (parts 4 and 5): "'They walked? No running or screaming, this time?' The last to speak was a thin woman who seemed slightly younger than Helen. Shee was pale, with her equally pale blond hair cut short. Pale eyes looked with amusement and disappointment as she looked at Quinn. 'Aunt Amy,' Quinn said, with a slight frown, 'it is tradition to wait three days to cause a riot in a new school." (Part 5)


• Unnamed story (IC: Criminals of Lawndale), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Quietly, the SWAT team carefully and quietly advanced up the apartment stairway to number 211838. The night helped them stay discreet; if any of the other residents knew that they there was a dangerous psychopath right next door, they'd run away screaming and the target would probably escape unnoticed. No, this had to be done very, very quietly."


• Unnamed story (IC: Words Don't Kill People. I DO.), by mac (COMPLETE!): "'Guns don't kill people. I do.' Steve yelped. She was BEHIND him! 'Does my voice annoy you?'"


• Unnamed story (IC: Words Don't Kill People. I DO.), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "'This can't be good for me....' Trent said as he and the rest of Mystik Spiral and the Harpies all smoked their joints together in the back room of the Zon on a circular couch. 'But I feel great!'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic should have: Delightful and Naughty), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "'Jane, you are not going to believe this.' 'What?'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic should have: Delightful and Naughty), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "Quinn looked deeply into the eyes of her latest squeeze-for-a-night, Jimbo or Jambalaya or whatever his name was."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic should have: Delightful and Naughty), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "Daria examined the photographs in Jane's living room. 'Ever notice your father's porno 'stache?' asked Daria."

Looking Down the Barrel of a Gun

Happy Pistol Patent Day! Today is the anniversary of the day that Samuel Colt received a patent for his Colt Revolver pistol. Daria is surely quite glad of that, although I think Quinn should be feeling a bit nervous right now.

This is also the anniversary of the original air date of the episode "Partner's Complaint," in which Daria finally made her peace (sort of) with Tom. The beginning of future horrors, right there.

Fanfic Update!

• After the Disaster :: Chapter Five, by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "Tiffany quietly stared at the bottle of medication in front of her, contemplating what life after death was really like. If people would miss her or even care. She knew Brooke wouldn't care... her parents might... but they'd be better off without having a mentally deficient daughter slowing them down. They both had bright careers ahead of them and knew what they were doing... and Tiffany couldn't stand to let them just bring them down." (Part 4) (Chapter 5.5)


• At the Crossroads... (Chapter 6), by oni (parts 2 and 3): "'Joking aside Sandi, I am afraid of your mom. When I called here last Friday, she picked up and really chewed me out over the phone,' Stacy said in a serious tone. The girl with pigtails adjusted her clothes while Sandi sat upright. The older brunette went for a kiss on her girlfriend’s lips and slowly pulled while she replied, 'I’d protect you if my mother tried to attack you in anyway, baby.'" (Part 3)


• Clique Swap, by psychotol (part 2): "Scene: Lawndale Airport, Stacy, Quinn and Tiffany are stood next to their suitcases, each holds a Legal sized folder, their parents vehicles wait nearby, each fashion clubber’s mother stood next to their respective vehicle. Voiceover: 'The day for the swap has arrived. Any minute now the spacecraft carrying the Sith will arrive.'" (Part 3)


• Daria - Double Down, by neonhomer (part 29): "'Tilly? This is Tristan....' 'HOW in the HELL did you get my phone number? I don’t even know this number yet!' 'I lifted it from your file in the guidance office.'"


• A Distant Lawndale, by Arena del Sur (part 4): "Why I am not my name... Why I am alone and I can't be... Because today I've been born. Just today sun burnt me, and the wind of living wake me up. It's almost Zen, don't you think?"


• God Save The Esteem ep40: This Is No Fun, by Charles RB (part 1): "He knocked on her door. 'Open up, it’s the Thought Police.' Nothing. Tom pushed the door open and Daria was sitting next to her computer. The screen showed a Wikipedia page but her eyes showed no sign of reading anything. Her clothes were crumpled and several days old, her hair uncombed."


• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin’s Genie (Chapter 6), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 6): "Meanwhile, Dennis was plotting. 'More than an earthquake!’ he thought. ‘A volcano!’"


• Living up to your Potential, by BF110C4 (parts 1 and 2): "Her parents were going to be out all night, on one of the few parties from a friend of theirs that was actually fun, to end on a local hotel to continue the celebrations long after the party was over, of course since in this particular reunion they weren’t any politicians or powerful people to impress with her accomplishments she wasn’t invited, leaved behind to take care of her sister Rachel and her little brother Evan." (Part 2)


• My New Life, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "'I swear it to you Quinn. You'll pay for this .' said Dario while they were returning home 'Oh come on Dario . It was only two outfits .' 'TWO OUTFITS ?! Quinn you and your little friends used me as a mannequin for over an hour.'" (Part 6)


• Return of the Runaway 01, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "'Name?' 'Lillian Adams.' 'And why are you after the Morgendorffer's information?' 'I happen to know where their lost daughter, Daria, is.' 'Oh, but many people may come claiming to know where Daria is.' 'Of course, but I know the proof that the Morgendorffer's may have required.'"


• Rude Awakening Ep.10: Sandi vs The EPT, by DIsaac (part 3): "CHIPMUNK: Guys... Sandi is expecting. DARIA: A raise? CHIPMUNK: A baby. She's pregnant!"


• Sandi, Meet Sandi (Rude Awakening X-Tra: You meeting You), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "SANDI: Answer me this.....I'm a model? RA SANDI: No. SANDI: Well there is no more to say. (Sandi gets up from the table when RA Sandi grabs her arm.) RA SANDI: Oh no you don't......You aren't control this conversation! SANDI: What do you want? RA SANDI: To tell what's REALLY up. A reality check you might say."


• Sandi :: Well... This Sucks :: Chapter 6, by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "Marz's voice picked up with a sign of joy, relief even, but he tried to hide it, 'Oh? What's been going on?' He had an idea that Sandi was a werewolf but before making a drastic move he had to be sure... Then he could continue with his plans of... well... Revenge." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)


• Stacy is a Horrible....... Torturer (Iron Chef: How did we get here?), by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "Ah, a nice morning to start another imperfect day of... Where's Sandi? She knew she fell asleep next to Sandi but... Glancing at the handcuffs she was wearing, Stacy Rowe sighed, 'Aww... she got away....'"


• Unnamed story (PLOT BUNNIES: free to good home), by Roentgen (plot bunny): "'Now Daria,' Jake said, 'the entire family is counting on you.' 'I know that, Dad,' Daria said somberly. She didn't bother remarking to Jake the graffiti 'OTHER SIDE' that she saw marked on a wall near a telephone poll. Maryland, frankly, was not safe, too Southron to ever really relax. She felt the family should have kept going until they hit Vermont, but Helen's mother wanted them close to Virginia."


• We Only Hurt the Ones We Love (IC Runaway Daria), by deneich (part 6): "No one will ever accuse me of being a huggy, touchy-feely sort of person, but, hearing the tone of Jane's voice screaming need and apology far more strongly then her words ever could; I, spontaneously, without a thought, turned and wrapped Jane in a strong, reassuring embrace. Feeling Jane tense noticeably my reaction was to lessen the intensity of the embrace – stupid acting without thinking, then, just as I was about to release my hold, Jane relaxed, Gently placed her hands on the small of my back and melted into our now mutual embrace."


• X-men: Daria’s Evolution, by Reven384 (part 5): "Quinn’s eyes darted around looking at the grey walls that held her. There was nothing else. It was almost too dark to see. She had wires and tubes coming in and out of her body. It hurt so much that she cried sometimes. But the electric shocks were worse. She did as she was told simply to avoid the electric shocks, but even without the shocks she was in constant pain."

It's Okay to Cry, and It's Okay to...Draw!

On this day in 1881, the Gunfight at the O.K. Corral was fought between Frank McLaury, Tom McLaury, and Billy Clanton on one side and Morgan Earp, Virgil Earp, and Doc Holliday on the other. This happened more than a century before O'Neill came up with the O.K. to Cry Corral, and I think we can all agree that the camp would have been much more interesting if there'd been a shootout involved.

The Angst Guy crossed Doc Holliday over with Daria in Death Takes a Holliday, which is worth a read--especially for those interested in the Old West.

The PPMB is currently experiencing technical difficulties, but I'll post the fanfic update that I had as of last night. Obviously the links won't work until the board is back up, but when it does I will also add whatever I may have missed in the meantime. So...enjoy some fanfic fragments for now!

• The Author as a Lesbian, Season 3, by DeacBlue (part 3): "Daria was unsurprised when, later, the intercom said, 'Ms. Morgendorffer, Ms. Burns, and Ms. Lane report to the office after lunch.' All three girls looked at each other and shrugged. Once they entered the office, Ms. Li motioned from her door. 'Come in, ladies.' When they were all seated, she continued. 'I'm sure that you're all aware of why you're here today.' 'Actually, we're not,' Daria said in a dry tone."


• The Esteem of Haruhi Suzumiya, by Walter Kovacs (parts 3 and 4): "DeMartino gazed at Haruhi in a mix of despair and irritation. Then he turned to another student, a black-haired girl with azure eyes who was wearing a red jacket, a black shirt, grey shorts, black leggings. 'I have to apologize to you, Ms. Lane' 'Apologize for what?' 'I never thought I'd meet any students as irritatingly sarcastic as you or..' he turned his eyes to an oriental boy in a green T-shirt 'Your brother Kyon' He took a few deep breaths. 'But apparently the two Morgendorffer sisters are even worse.'" (Part 4)


• Five Minutes to Midnight - 11:56, by untra (parts 1 and 2): "Jane is real, I'm sure of it. Because right now there is glass on my lap and my adrenaline is racing again and the mild northeast wind brushes hair into my eyes, and somewhere down the line someone will have to pay for that side view window. The gun is a revolver of some kind, I think. I don't know much about guns, but I know it holds six bullets. And now it has five. I take a deep breath and squirm uncomfortably as I realize glass shards are getting into my skirt, are brushing against my legs." (Part 2)


• God Save The Esteem ep36: Occupational Hazard, by Charles RB (part 3): "'And then after the pitch, you say you want some fucking money. In those words.' Jake thought it over. 'Maybe say "bastard" again too, you may have to wing that one.' 'I see. And this has worked.' 'YES!' cheered the punks. 'Do you think this possibly might be because you are physically intimidating and the loan officer was afraid you'd hurt him if he turned you down?' 'Nah,' said Jake. 'I did a pie chart.'"


• In My World, by 45Ranger (parts 5/6): "'Well, Daria! As long as you have your hand raised... Last week we began a unit on westward expansion. Perhaps you feel it's unfair to be asked a question on your first day of class.' Daria quirked an eyebrow at this and fixed her gaze on the man. 'I doubt it would make a difference if I did. Ask away.' 'Daria, can you concisely and unemotionally sum up for us the doctrine of Manifest Destiny?' 'Concisely? Yes. Unemotionally? I can try.' Her voice dripped with sarcasm."


• Is It Halloween Yet?, by peapotmaster (part 1): "Meanwhile, at Lawndale High, the students are continuing to decorate the school for the Halloween dance this Saturday, and as usual it’s mandatory. 'Let me get this straight, Daria, you saw a ghost in your kitchen?' Jane Lane asked me. 'What’s next, Kevin will be dating Bigfoot?' 'I’m serious, Jane,' I replied. 'It couldn’t be Quinn, with her figure and all.'"


• Rocksteemsters (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "The cougar-skin topped vehicle sailed down the dirt road at an amazing 60 miles per hour, powered entirely by Jake Morgenboulder's racing feet. He managed to avoid the giant flying insects as he drove, and for a man born in an ancient era he was surprisingly able to hold a conversation."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef - In the movies), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "JANE: Trent... (Trent smiles.) TRENT: Be sure and write - or whatever it is they do up there. (Daria starts the lift.) JANE: Daria! Daria, wait! (Daria stops the lift as Jane runs over, and steps upon the lift. Jane hugs her, and they both look upward as the lift starts up once more.)"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef - In the movies), by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "In the background, Angela Li's car explodes, with Li in it. Closeup on Inspector Morgendorffer's battered and bruised face. 'A girl's got to know her limitations.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef - In the movies), by Grifter74 (COMPLETE!): "Daria lifted her Mother's sword once more as she pressed the wound, Count Schretcher the six-fingered man had given her with her other hand. With a wry smile, she said, 'Hello, my name is Daria Morgendorffer. You killed my mother! Prepare to die.'"

BANG!

Today is the 206th anniversary of the last second-to-the-last time that a Vice President of the United States got away with shooting someone while still in office. VP Aaron Burr plugged former cabinet member Alexander Hamilton in the most famous duel in USA history (not counting wild gunfights like at the OK Corral). Hamilton died but got his face on the $10 bill as a consolation prize. Burr's feat remained unchallenged until February 2006. No Vice President of the Fashion Club has ever shot anyone, so far as can be proven.

Also on this date, 31 years ago, Australia was destroyed when the American space station Skylab landed on it after reentry. NASA was fined $400 for littering as a result, but NASA refused to pay because, hey, it was Australia.

And this is the 10th anniversary of the day that Outpost Daria was foxed. Oh, boy. Moar shortly.

PPMB

• Daria/Dorian 4—Partner's Compromise, by LadieT (continued): The conversation between the three was broken by Quinn's whistle. Dorian and Jane looked up and saw the off-white bridal gown and smoky light gray tuxedo in Quinn's hands. Jane jumped up and walked around the dress. Quinn stopped her and held the dress up in front of her. The effect on Dorian was instantaneous. She would look beautiful in that dress. I don't believe I just thought that. Yet, I can't take my eyes off of her. (FF.net)
  
• Finn Morgendorffer 52: With Extra Bitters, by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): “We’ll get along just fine,” Henry remarked. “Ooh, you wanna know what this dinner party needs, Daria? Civilians. I mean, if they’re trying to have an assassination, what really brings it home for the viewers is the chaos and screaming and trampling. So you gotta have people screaming and diving for cover and praying to Jesus and all that. Two competent people to stop the assassination, one person who knows about it, everyone else needs to be screaming and scared and crapping themselves.” Henry delivered this information with a lot of cheerfulness.
• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (Part 15): Daria bounced over the lunar surface, following Sam towards what he described as a large depression. Sam had told her that there was something really cool inside; she could not begin to guess what it might be. Everything she'd seen so far was exquisitely cool. Her spacesuit, for example, was not a bulky Apollo-era apparatus; instead, it was a skin-tight one-piece garment with a clear plastic bubble over her head. The outfit reminded her of the covers of pulp science-fiction magazines, with attractive blonde space girls being threatened by all manner of unspeakable alien monsters. Despite feeling a little self-conscious about the suit, Daria was having a good time, leaping far higher than she possibly could on Earth.
• True Blood, by Project Pegasus (COMPLETE!): "Have you been doing heroin... without me?" "Leave me alone." "Answer me! What have you been doing?" "Selling my body." "You're selling your body for drugs?!" "No, don't be ridiculous. I'm selling my blood plasma at the local blood bank. I get sixty bucks a visit." (Daria/Teen Titans)
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Crossover the Pond), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): A serene lake, no ripples. No wind. Only the occasional sound of a seabird. All is calm. All is bliss. All is peace. Suddenly, Sandi Griffin bursts out of the water, coughing and gasping for breath as she crawls up onto the beach, sea weed and plants hanging from her clothes and hair. She staggers to her feet and walks unsteadily towards the camera. "Make me wait under the freakin' water for two freakin' minutes," she mutters. "Can't be any ripples, she says... Seven freakin' takes in a row... Pants and shoes are wrecked... I swear I'm gonna—" (Daria/Monty Python's Flying Circus)
• NEW! The White Fox, by Lord Akiyama (Part 1): "I dunno about you, but I'm finding this whole thing really creepy," Jane said. "Tell me about it," Daria said. "The likelihood of you and I having the exact same dream are slim to none." "I refuse to believe what apparently happened yesterday was real," Jane stated firmly. "I refuse to believe any thing that has happened in life is real," Daria stated herself. "Doesn't make them any less true." "Good point," Jane noted after a moment's though. "But generally speaking, there's no way that Holiday Island actually exists and that we encountered the living embodiments of St. Patrick's Day, Cupid, Halloween, Christmas, Guy Fawkes Day, and the like."
  

Politics in the Good Old Days

A mere 254 years ago, Aaron Burr was born. He grew up to be the first (and last) Vice President of the United States who was legally allowed to shoot his political opponents dead. Sadly, the laws were changed after Burr's famous duel with duel-loser Alexander Hamilton (former Secretary of the Treasury), and now Vice Presidents are only allowed to shoot people by accident. I am not sure if Kevin (at left) is supposed to be Aaron Burr, but it's the closest alter ego there is to him, so it will do.

This is the 115th birthday anniversary of Babe "The Big Bambino" Ruth, not the candy bar but the baseball guy. The candy bar was not named for him. It's a long story.

And this is the 58th anniversary of the most peculiar royal succession ever, when Princess Elizabeth climbed into a giant treehouse in Kenya and was there notified that she had just become Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom. She went up a princess, came down a queen. And people say there's no such thing as magic. Disney must have had a hand in this, you know he did.

And if you're heading over to Facebook's Daria page, the official one by MTV, say hi to one of our own! Thanks, Kara!