Are There Any Operas About Boy Scouts?

Better not accuse these kids of being Reds, because it's Boy Scout Day and they're only here to help old ladies cross the street and sell popcorn! And maybe be Reds. You never really know.

This is also Opera Day, so be sure to catch the command performance of Madame Butterfly in the automotive department at Payday! Pick up some free snacks while you're there, but don't let Mr. DeMartino catch you.

Fanfic Update!

• Song From An American Movie, by ladyevil (part 8): "'Stop filming this!' Tori yelled at the camera. 'I said stop filming this, you little slut!'"

John Jacob Jingleheimer RUN!

Better pay your cookie debts now, because it doesn't look like those cute little girls are going to take no for an answer on National Girl Scout Cookie Day. Jane, I'm looking at you. Pay the girls before they tear you apart!

Then again, those Girl Scouts should be defending their turf because today is also National Boy Scout Day. I do not want to see that fight go down. Sugar and spice my ass.

Fandom News!

• RIP, Christopher Plummer and Leon Spinks.


• ipswichfan is searching for a story.

Disclaimer: Cookies Do Not Contain Girl Scouts

Jane had better look out, because it's National Girl Scout Cookie Day and she's in danger of incurring another Girl Scout cookie debt. Of course, perhaps she's safe from the temptation since her Girl Scout deprogramming, but you can never be too careful.

Today is also Boy Scout Day, and 1950's Jake will probably lead his troop in a rousing chorus of "America the Beautiful" before someone accuses them of being Reds.

Fanfic Update!

• Aunt Daria (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by Meester_Lee (part 1): "The taxi slowed down, then pulled into the driveway at 1111 Glenn Oaks Drive. A well-dressed, auburn-haired girl got out of the cab and walked back towards the cab’s trunk. The driver opened the trunk and lifted out three suitcases and set them on the concrete."


• Daria and Jane Learn Geography NOW!, by brothergrimace1 (COMPLETE!): "Jane: I changed my mind. (Daria looks at her) I'm okay with Quinn helping you out with this one."


• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 27): "Daria’s next class was Defense Against the Dark Arts. She looked forward to it with a mixture of worry and anticipation."


• Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 34): "After work Erin waited till only Michelle was left. 'Do you still want that wine?' Erin asked."


• Everything to Fear But Camp Itself, by Lady Evil (part 5): "'Well, hey, look at this sexy thing!' said Jake, pulling out a negligee. 'When were you going to surprise me with this?'"


• A Gentle Push From The Nest, by brothergrimace1 (COMPLETE!): "'Rossalyn! A friend of yours from school is here to see you!"


• Mine, by Vukodlak (part 13): "Quinn stood in front of the mirror holding up various skirts seeing which one would complete yet another perfect outfit."


• Naked Eyes (Daria and Quinn), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Daria was sitting on the couch writing on her laptop. Her cat, Godzilla, was curled up next to her. Something seemed to grab the cat's attention as he suddenly scurried off of the couch and onto the floor." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "Daria Barksdale sat in the passenger seat of her older sister's convertible, watching the East Coast landscape fly by—far faster than it legally should be."

Scout's Honor!

Ex-Girl Scout Jane probably already knows this, but today is National Girl Scout Cookie Day. You'd better pay up unless you want those adorable little thugs beating down your door!

In an interesting pint-sized battle of the sexes, today is also Boy Scout Day. Jamie, Jeffy, and Joey (or at least the 1950's fantasy versions of them) will celebrate by singing "America the Beautiful" and driving a young girl to accidentally entomb herself in a bomb shelter.

Fandom News!

• Keep up with the PyeongChang Winter Olympics.


• Discuss the news that Cape Town is running out of water.


• Talk about the Easter Eggs in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2012).


• Vote in the Deadliest Warrior poll between Hordak and Mon-Star.

Is This How Jane Used to Spend Her Time in the Girl Scouts?

Better watch your backs! It's National Girl Scout Cookie Day, and if those pint-sized thugs are any indication of how to celebrate the day, I think I'll pass. Interestingly, today also happens to be Boy Scout Day, so it looks like equal opportunity shakedowns are in order. Lock your doors, people!

Fanfic Update!

• Brittany and a Pernicious Problem, by Bill Bruford (COMPLETE!): "It was mid morning when they hit the slopes, well one of them did, the other shuffled along trying to keep balance. After many shoot downs of James's idea of chariot scythes on ski's, they began." (Part 5) (Part 6)


• Fashionably Five Oh, by psychotol (part 1): "Sandi wound up her run around the village she had been moved to."

If Only They Could Sing a Little More Quietly!

Happy Boy Scout Day! Daria--I mean, the Bad Grades House Girl--is less than impressed by their performance, but today is still the 102nd anniversary of the founding of the Boy Scouts of America.

Fanfic Update!

• After the Disaster :: Chapter 3, by Fhujeth_x (part 1): "That voice. It was one she hadn't heard in so long. One so familiar. A voice so trusting. The voice of a friend she had put a good seven years of her life into. Brooke..."


• Armored Cynic Daria, Episode 1: Esteem Rising, by RX-87 (part 3): "HELEN: Quinn! Both of you stop it. Now you both need to start heading to school, it starts in less than an hour. QUINN: But Mo-ommm! It's the middle of the afternoon. HELEN: Maybe it was in Highland, but here it's morning. QUINN: Ugh. Can't we have a day off to get settled in? If I go to school now I'm going to be all tired and puffy-eyed by the end of the day. Oh God, and it's my first day! What kind of first impression would I make?!"


• The Author as a Lesbian, Season 5, by DeacBlue (parts 11 and 12): "Helen put her hand on his shoulder. 'Frank, all I can tell you is that, by some strange roll of the dice, my daughter grew up as a very intelligent, self-sufficient young woman. She has also been far more social, and more importantly, happier, since she met Jane and your daughter. I have had to accept that she knows what she's doing, and that if she put herself in harm's way, it's to protect someone without whom she wouldn't be the same person. As someone once said, "There are things worth risking, and sometimes giving, everything for."'" (Part 12)


• Black Dress (IC: Without you...), by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Despite a month having passed, Quinn still couldn’t believe that what happened was true. Every morning she woke up hoping it was all a bad dream. But, unfortunately, it wasn’t. That tombstone in the cemetery was the proof that everything was real; that her friend was dead."


• Cinderella (Iron Chef - Homework assignments - Fairy Tales), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "Once upon a time there was a young maiden with brown hair and really frumpy clothes. She lived with her wicked step-mother and two mean red-headed step sisters. She had a daddy once too who really loved her and bought her lot of nice stuff, but he’s dead now. I’m not sure why - actually no he’s alive, but off doing daddy stuff in a country to the east."


• Coffee (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "The only thing she knew was that she had to kill him."


• Daria & Son 3: Freakin' Friends Redux, by Erin M. (part 1): "CHARLENE: It's what I do. MARK: When you aren't...what ARE you doing over there? CHARLENE: Making coats. Mark reaches over to Charlene's desk and picks up a small brightly colored patchwork coat. MARK: For dolls? CHARLENE: Hamsters."


• Hansel and Gretel (Iron Chef - Homework assignments - Fairy Tales), by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "Once upon a time... there were these two kids, named Hansel and Gretel. They were really poor. They were so poor they lived in like, a cottage in the woods. They didn't even have plumbing OR diet soda - so they were really fat."


• Into the Black, Into the Blue (Chapter 1), by Lord Yellowtail (part 1): "'Is something the matter, Ditzy Doo?' She smirked, not unkindly. Another few moments of jocularity. It shall all come crashing down soon enough. ... It was nice, having a friend."


• A Moment of Regret (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "'She's in surgery right now, that's why I called you. I figured she would want to see you when she wakes up,' Quinn said. You mean if she wakes up. Jane nodded. Looking over at the Sloanes, Jane asked Kay 'Are you here to check on Daria, too? Where's Tom?' Kay stared down at the floor. 'Angier and Tom were in the pile-up as well.'"


• A Mothers Love, by ash_blackfire (part 8): "'Jane, What is your dad’s name?' 'Vincent, why?' 'I think that you should meet someone.' Daria said with a smirk 'Ok, can it be after we have a pepperoni with 4 times the pepperoni?' 'Yes, it may just change your life'"


• A New Beginning (IC Runaway Daria), by LadieT (parts 1 and 2): "Looking at the well-worn copy of Black Beauty that was now in her hands, she thought about her mom, dad, and sister. They had gotten in a big fight over her unwillingness to make friends. In her six-year-old anger, she packed up some clothes, a blanket, and most of her books and what little bit of money that she had hidden in her pillowcase, climbed out her window and left." (Part 2)


• Sandi :: Well... This Sucks :: Chapter 1.5, by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "The others tests had come back normal. The blood results had come back fairly normal. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Sandi was just as fine as she had been the day before the animal attack. Fine for Sandi, that was. Minus some scarring on her left shoulder and upper arm."


• Sandi :: Well... This Sucks :: Chapter 2, by Fhujeth_x (parts 1 and 2): "It felt good to be back in school, with her usual clique of snobby, fashionable girls. Sandi walked with pride down the halls of Lawndale High as Stacy, Quinn, and Tiffany followed behind her in their usual manner of vanity. All eyes on her. That's what Sandi wanted. She was back, she was better, and she felt damn near great since." (Part 2)


• The Skelton Girl, by oni (part 3): "She turned her head in Daria’s direction with a pleading look in her eyes, and asked, 'Did anything happen at school for you Daria?' Daria looked at her mom for a couple of seconds, considering a sarcastic comment to end the conversation, but a sudden impulse in her decided to take the high road. 'Actually yes it did, mom. We had a new girl in some of my classes,' she replied."


• Twelve Weeks (Angst-Off!), by Angelinhel (COMPLETE!): "Okay, one good thing is there's no traffic at 4 am. He was running red lights. I had gone from trying not to to sob to a cold, dead feeling. As cold and dead as the towel I was sitting on. This was not the first time."


• Unexpected (continuation from Nemo Blank's unfinished story), by mmmdraco (part 2): "Pulling a hand up to her mouth, Jane started to gnaw on a thumb nail. 'What the hell happened to my brother?' Daria sighed. 'He's still in there, Jane. He's just got a little more polish on him, a slight militant bent to how he does things now... and some secrets we need to make sure we don't ask him about.'"


• Unnamed story (A genderswap never before done), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Well, my history teacher hates me because I know all the answers, but there are some interesting idiots in my class.' 'That's great, poppet!' Daria's father - sleek, emaculate, the suit that walked like a man - gave the merest hint of a wince, and then calmly said: 'Like your mother says, you shouldn't judge people until you get to know them.'"


• Unnamed story (IC Runaway Daria), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "'Mheh. Heheheh. Hey, Butthead?' 'Uhh... Yeah, Beavis?' 'Remember that chick we went to kindergarten with?'"


• We Only Hurt the Ones We Love (IC Runaway Daria), by deneich (part 1): "As she stared at the freshly placed glass of soda while sitting in a well worn booth of a down-scale chain restaurant; Daria had to admit, that of the many possibilities her decision to end – unannounced – her estrangement and return to her family might involve."


• With An "Uh", And An "Um", by mmmdraco (part 20): "Daria took a deep breath. 'Actually, I'm buying the champagne, and it's not just for you. While I'm very proud of your achievement, and the fact that your nap has made you able to function more like a human being again, I also want to celebrate the fact that I have an agent who wants to take me on. I got the contract in the mail today.'"

"No one will ever accuse these kids of being Reds!"

Today is the 101st anniversary of the founding of the Boy Scouts of America. Aside from the appearance in "Legends of the Mall," shown on the right, the only real reference made to the Boy Scouts in Daria is that Jake and Rita's boyfriend Paul were in the Scouts together as boys. However, without the Boy Scouts we probably would not have had Girl Scouts, and Jane would never have had to endure hearing the song "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt" while going on hikes. And who wants that?

By the way, has anyone ever written a story about Jake in Boy Scouts? If not, they should. Like, right now. I'll wait. (checks watch)

While we wait, here's the latest fanfic:

• Another normal day in Lawndale, by JPAGC (part 9): "Jane watched her closely. Her long experience being a teenage semi-outcast had taught her that, in some rare occasions, more popular classmates would secretly approach and confide in her, usually to relieve tension about a test, parent's expectations, friendships or pour their hearts out about girlfriends or boyfriends. It was as if being a semi-abandoned semi-alternative teenage artist led others to the conviction she was discreet and available. She didn't quite understand it, but she didn't mind nor complain, as she though these things kind of protected her of being a complete outcast and thrown to the wolves."


• Daria/Dorian Ch. 13 Paper Towels and Open Flames Don't Mix, by LadieT (part 1): "Dorian was sound asleep after spending several hours working out with Mack and the three Js. The Daria side of his brain, however heard her father's screams. Dorian, this isn't a social call. The house is on fire so GET YOUR ASS UP AND GET US OUT OF HERE! Dorian grabbed his glasses and bolted out of bed. He ran into Quinn as he left his room. His parents were already heading outside. Helen was on her cellphone calling the fire department. They met out by the curb as their neighbors started to gather around. A few minutes later, sounds of sirens blaring filled the air."


• Daria is Raven's Apprentice, by project pegasus: "Daria: (to Jodie) Boy, things sure have changed since I left. Jodie: More like since Sandi left. Raven: That's right. Arrowette put an arrow through her head. Jodie: Thanks for the expository material." (Another part here)


• Fugitive Chapter 7: Britpop, by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "In front of him stood a middle-aged man, probably the owner of the shop. His smile seemed somehow off, as if he was incredibly pleased to see someone in his store. He had a neatly trimmed beard of short raven black hair and equally black scalp hair, styled like a proper gentleman from way back would have done it. He wore a white shirt decorated with quillings, a black shiny black vest, black pants and round, black sunglasses. But what he really looked at was the man's walking stick, decorated with a shiny, skull shaped knob on the tip. For a moment he thought the eyes of said skull were shining."


• Galahad (Iron Chef: Mary Sue), by Cap: "Daria held up a hand stopping the flow of adjectives. 'For a teenager,' she began. 'Galahad's good looking in a traditional masculine manner. He's also intelligent, a gentleman in the truest sense, surprisingly sophisticated, very talented, amazingly patient and unfailingly kind but will stomp the crap out of anyone I ask him to.' 'Ooooh, sounds perfect,' Jane cooed. 'When do I get to meet him?' 'Graduation,' Daria replied peevishly."


• Genesis, by VPrad (part 4): "Next to her car stood the person responsible for Trent's current condition, the woman who had destroyed his mind, Daria Morgendorffer, and behind her, her sister Quinn. Without saying a word, Jane walked towards her. 'Hello Jane.' Daria said softly when she was close enough. Without saying a word, Jane threw a hard punch to her face that sent her glasses flying. The impact of Jane's fist caused Daria to fall to the ground. 'I told you this would happen if I ever saw you again.'"


• God Save The Esteem ep20: Bearing Gifts, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "She found the table easy enough. She could see her grandmother and the Fielding professor, the latter clearly bewildered, the former freezing in mid-greet and only just keeping down a look of horror. Grandma Barksdale had not expected Daria to turn up in her usual clothes, combat boots and all. And she certainly hadn't expected Daria to have a shock of bright-green hair."


• Holiday Roadtrip, by Chris Tucker: "10 minutes later, having SLOOWWLY made it to the exit, they were able to pull into the parking lot of a gas station/diner. The three girls got out of the car and stretched. 'You know, we could just stay here. There's a gas station and a place to eat. We have cell phones and a computer. I say we just live in the car, transfer to the University of Phoenix and finish our college educations online. It'd be faster than trying to get back to Boston.'"


• The House of Cards, by Doggieboy (part 3): "Robert walked into the bathroom to relieve himself and wash his hands one last time before he left. When the door crashed open and a flash-bang grenade went off, he cried out in shock and looked into the mirror as his eyes turned black in color. Despite the shock to his ears, he heard two men rush into the room and turned to face them."


• How to Train Your Daria, by Hyrin (part 2): "'I still can't get over that: there are dragons here! Real dragons. That's cool.' 'Why are you surprised? Didn't you read the information that we got when we signed up for this program?' Jane's smirk answered that question. Daria sighed. “The people who live here are the descendants of a group that broke away from the Vikings 300 years ago to hunt dragons. It was three years ago that the fighting between the two groups finally stopped. Now, the dragons are integrated into their society and you're asleep so I'm going to shut up now. A light snore was Jane's only reply."


• Lawndale Seven Chapter One, by Wassersauefer (part 2): "Highland had never been this fun. There she couldn't even get into the clubs, here they only took a good look on her and let her in with a smile. Even if the big bouncer was really intimidating, with all the spikes on his head and his arms bigger than her body. One minute she was dancing very close with a boy she didn't even wanted to know the name of, the next moment she got handed a pink drink by someone. She mouthed a thanks, it was way to loud to talk, before she took a sip. It tasted sweet and had a funny aftertaste."


• Life As We View It, by GingerLove84 (parts 1 - 6): "(Cut to Daria near the door. She's got her boots on now and has already carried her bags to the car. She pauses, looking hesitant. Sighing, she steps out the door and starts to lock it, jumping as her cell phone rings. Flipping it open, she puts it to her ear as she locks the door.) JANE: The apartment will be fine Morgendorffer. You haven't forgotten anything, lock it up and go." (Part 2)(Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)


• Life Beyond Highland, by LadieT (part 15): "Before Daria could answer, Professor Barch entered the room. Daria just nodded and focused her attention to the woman at the front of the class. The middle-aged woman gave a long scan of the room before spending the rest of the class going over the safety rules for the class. The one thing Daria realized early on was that the teacher really hated the male students in her class. Great, just what I need. A whacko nut job professor near dangerous chemicals. Remind me to find the local Army/Navy store and see of they have a hazmat suit in my size."


• LLH Alternate Future 06 - Please Give Me Your Full Attention, by psychotol: "'MISSING, NUCLEAR, MATERIAL, BRITTANY!' said Jane. ... 'We have no choice. We spare anyone from finding that in favour of anything even finding one of our own ... ... ' 'Missing fissile nuclear material,' said Jodie, 'enough for forty critical masses, up to thirty eight nukes. On the plus side,' said Jodie."


• Oh, By The Way, by RLobinske (parts 4 and 5): "When Jake stepped forward toward Quinn, he bumped into Helen. When their eyes met, they saw the overloading emotion in the other's eyes and at the same time, Helen said, 'Heart Attack!' while Jake said, 'Stroke! The exclamations broke Jake and Helen from their shock. A sudden, huge grin formed on Jake's face before he said, 'I'm going to be a grandfather!'" (Part 5)


• Promises, by LadieT (part 4): "Jane and Jake sat quietly on opposite sides of Cleo's bed. Every so often, Jake would turn and look at Jane and see the concern on her face. Unlike Helen, Jake didn't hate Jane. He wanted his oldest daughter to be happy and if Jane made her smile, then he was satisfied with that. He was more upset over the fact that Helen had denied him one of the few things he had wanted to do in life, walking Daria down the aisle at her wedding."


• Quinn's Code - Story 1: The Esteemsters Code, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 7): "'What are Mom and Dad arguing about, Daria?' she asked. 'Better to ask her than to try to ask them,' she thought. 'I suggested to Mom that we go to Pizza Forest for Dinner like we used to,' Daria said, matter of factly. Quinn had also seen the Lawndale franchise of Pizza Forest near the Mall the previous day. 'The place with the singers! No wonder they are arguing, Daria. Most of the people hired to be the singers can hardly hold a note!'"


• Random fic, by GingerLove84 (COMPLETE!): "Her husband was at a gig, something he did mainly for fun these days. He'd long ago surrendered to the fact that his band was not going to support his family. But the gigs still gave him a rush that nothing could replace. Daria had stopped joining him after the baby was born, but she remembered the excitement of gig night well. There was always something magical about watching him on stage, and it always brought back the memories of the night that changed her life forever."


• Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "O.K., Daria, just how hot was it 60 million years ago?' 'I dunno, Jane, let me check the paleothermometer....' 'Paleothermometer? I've never heard of it.' 'It's one of those ideas that didn't go quite far enough. You know, like the Small Bang Theory. Still, the invention has some positive uses....'"


• Spirit of the Game, Nature of the Beast, by HolyGrail2007 (parts 19 and 20): "While she truly didn't care anymore for them, it only mattered because of Tom. Bianca didn't want to tarnish the opinion of the one person whose opinion actually mattered to her. Her one friend here, who didn't see her as some lust object or an agent of sabotage to be used. He saw a person, a friend. A feeling Bianca could barely remember, but she liked it." (Part 20)


• Unnamed story (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by peapotmaster (COMPLETE!): "Daria: I am Daria, and I didn't know I was related to some barbarian named He-Man. Magical powers were given to me when I lifted up my sword and said: "By the Honor of Grayskull!""


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The USA and Canada mine, So how did I do it?), by Cap (COMPLETE!): "Daria closed the heavy drapes turning around in disgust. She snapped her fingers at the nearest flunky."