Somehow I Doubt Mystik Spiral Plays This One

Jake seems to be rethinking his decision to celebrate National Dive Bar Day, but at least he's getting out and making friends. I gotta say, a small town like Lawndale having not one, not two, but three dive bars (this one plus the Zon and McGrundy's) seems a little odd. What the heck is going on there?

I think Jake would have been better off celebrating World Chocolate Day instead, or at least he would if he could wrestle any of it away from Mrs. Johannsen. She's not one to tangle with; just ask Mr. DeMartino.

Both the episodes "Road Worrier" and "It Happened One Nut" first aired on this day in 1997 and 1999. There were no dive bars or chocolate in either, but we did see a greasy spoon in the first and peanuts hijacked Trent's brain in the second. "You've hijacked my brain, moth to a flame, if you don't release me it'll really be lame."

Eh. Still needs work.

Fanfic Update!

• Boston Sunset, by Yuuuutong (COMPLETE!): "The luckiest thing in Daria and Jane’s life maybe, after graduating from the senior high school, they went to Boston together."


• But You're a Cheerleader, by Bolshevitch (part 2): "It’s 6am and cold. Biting cold. Like God left his freezer open the whole night. Somehow your high school’s bus lot is never very thermally efficient."


• Daria Enrolls At Nevermore: An Experiment, by Meester_Lee (part 18): "After bringing up their luggage, Helen had an idea. 'Let’s take your bike,' she said. 'I assume that you want me to drive,' said Sirius."


• Her Last Words, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (part 88): "All of Layndale and the nearby mountains endured three days of storm with heavy snow and lashing winds, and even though daylight had almost disappeared and the temperature had dropped to alarming levels, soon the storm passed as it followed a path to the North and everything began to slowly warm up."


• Telephone, by Bolshevitch (COMPLETE!): "'Picture this, Daria,' Jane leans beside her friend’s locker, watching her take out an armful of textbooks for English next period, 'me, you, and Kannibal Killers 4: the Re-Kannibalizing on VHS.'"

Nuts and Chocolate, Better Together!

I think Mrs. Johannsen's chocolate obsession has finally gone too far, even on Chocolate Day. I mean, all of fandom knows that I have no room to judge, but even I know that it's better to eat the chocolate than to be the chocolate.

Today is also the anniversary of the episodes "Road Worrier" in 1997 and "It Happened One Nut" in 1999. Both were quite nutty, in that Daria sat on a peanut butter sandwich in the former and sold nuts in the latter. Good news for nut fans, but bad news for Quinn and her pistachio dye allergy.

Fandom News!

• Share your thoughts on Kanye West announcing a presidential run.


• Discuss the deaths of Ennio Morricone and Charlie Daniels.

Crunch Munch Nuts!

Jake's eager to celebrate National Cashew Day with his favorite nut, because "those are what the big guys eat!" Pick up a bag yourself from It's a Nutty, Nutty, Nutty World and be sure to say hi to Daria while you're there. Assuming she isn't hiding in the back room.

Also on this day, "Her, Uh, Cane" by paperpusher was posted on FanFiction.net. It's the earliest story on the Daria list, dated all the way back to 1998. How time flies!

Fandom News!

• Talk about New York State's trouble with bail reform.


• Share your thoughts on the fanfic "Heroes."


• What do you think about "The Elric Saga" coming to TV?


• Discuss Trump wanting the U.S. out of NATO.

Chocolate and Nuts? What a Great Combination!

Anyone care for a chocolate-covered Mrs. Johannsen for Chocolate Day? I'll pass, but only because I have plenty of chocolate stashed away already. You have fun, though!

Today is also the anniversary of both "Road Worrier" in 1997 and "It Happened One Nut" in 1999. Daria sat on a peanut butter sandwich in one and dispensed nuts in the other. Someone working on the show was just nuts about nuts!

Fanfic Update!

• Am I A Grownup Yet?, by jones2000 (part 19): "'We're going to the Hamptons.' 'We're doing what now?'"


• Daria: A Post-Electric Play, by Roentgen (part 1): "'I'm sitting here in a railray station got a ticket for my destination...hmmm hmmm....' Poe finished sweeping the floor. Or at least she thought she had finished sweeping it. All it took was one little wind from somewhere to bring the dust right back into this run-down shack somewhere along the Mississippi."


• Getting By, by EntrancedCat (part 11): "Kevin's mouth gaped on empty air as Tiffany broke their kiss by dropping down from tip-toes. 'What is it, babe?' Kevin asked as Tiffany turned her face from his. 'Is my Honest Abe costume beard tickling you, dollface?'"


• Timmy The Model (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "It's late August so Quinn and Jim are at the mall with Tommy, Timmy and Teddy to do what all parents do in the waning days of summer: shop for back-to-school clothes. They are currently in the pre-teen section of Cashmans. Jim is loaded down with the latest styles for school age boys." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Truth or Dare (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Shiva (part 1): "Inexplicably Daria and Jane found themselves playing Truth or Dare during a sleepover at Jane's place. The reasons for all of this are inexplicable and have no baring on canon beyond what you are willing to believe."

I Want a Damn Chocolate Bar, Too!

Mrs. Johanssen has gotten just a little too into the spirit of World Chocolate Day, but then again I think that's how she'd have wanted to go. I'm sure Daria and Tom will eat a few boxes of Quinn's chocolates in honor of the holiday, and given the opportunity I just might consider indulging myself.

Today is also a double anniversary for the episodes "Road Worrier" and "It Happened One Nut," which aired on this day in 1997 and 1999. Both episodes include an unusually high number of humiliations for Daria in front of Trent, as well as a slightly significant role for rodents--pervert squirrels in one, and escaped gerbils in the other.

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Ravenclaw: The Highland Years, by Meester_Lee (part 18b): "The teachers and children left the small auditorium and went into the first exhibit, the Permian Reef Exhibit."


• Dylan, by J-D (part 36a): "'Thank you! Thank you! Oh, thank you!' Dylan was even more disturbed than he was surprised by what seemed to be an effusive rush of gratitude from Millie."


• Of Inhuman Bonding, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'Wow, Helen! It's beautiful up here!' Jake said, staring in awe at the view. Helen, meanwhile, had noticed that they were directly on course to crash into a tree."


• Shadows of a Timeless Song, by Dennis (part 14): "If Daria thought she and Hermione had reached some sort of rapprochement, the train ride back to Angelsey disabused her."


• Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (parts 25 and 26): "'Funny,' Karen said, 'I thought these uniforms were a lot thinner. At least, they look thin on TV.' Karen shifted her weight back and forth. Even though she had filled out in the right places since she had started training, she was still slightly self-conscious about her body." (Part 26)

Now She IS a Damn Chocolate Bar!

It turns out you really are what you eat, as Mrs. Johanssen demonstrates today, which happens to be Chocolate Day. It also happens to be one of my all-time favorite holidays.

This is also a double anniversary for episodes, as both "Road Worrier" and "It Happened One Nut" aired on this day in 1997 and 1999. Interestingly, both episodes feature Daria's unpleasant interactions with nuts. In the first, she sits on a peanut butter sandwich. In the second, she has to sell nuts while--ugh--smiling.

Fandom News!

• Tell everyone about Halloween costumes you've worn in the past.


• candy_darling has started a petition to get MTV to put Daria's original music back on the DVDs.


• Princess_Pasta shares her Daria impression in a short video.


• Minecraft fans can discuss the game in a new Weapons of Mass Distraction thread.


• tafka posted a new Iron Chef in Creative Writing: How Nice?

Mmmm...Random Holidays....

Great news, everybody! It's Chocolate Day! I don't think I need to tell you how to celebrate this one, so go crazy. And remember to share!

In non-chocolate-related news, this is also the anniversary of both "Road Worrier" in 1997 and "It Happened One Nut" in 1999. Fortunately, both episodes feature peanuts, and peanuts go well with chocolate. Everyone wins!

Fandom News!

• Please clear your unwanted attachments to make space on the PPMB.


• Share your favorite pop-rock tunes from the 80s.


• acidcooch88 is looking for a Ranger Thorne fanfic.


• Check out the new Daria cosplay thread in The Easel.

"I don't need a damn doctor; I need a damn chocolate bar!"

It's Chocolate Day! If you need me to tell you how to celebrate this one, then there's just no hope for you. Besides, I'm about to start my own observance of the holiday myself.

First, though, I should mention that today is also the anniversary of both "Road Worrier" in 1997 and "It Happened One Nut" in 1999. Both featured peanut products of some kind--the peanut butter sandwich Daria sat on in the former, and Trent's all-consuming craving for peanuts in the latter. I would also like to point out that peanuts go very well with chocolate.

Fandom News!

• List your ideas on topics that drive people crazy.


• Can you explain the discovery of the Higgs boson to a seven year old? Heck, can anyone explain it to this twenty-something blogger?


• Discuss Daria in "Quinn the Brain," and whether or not it's an example of Daria's hotness.


• Are Tom and Jane together again? Check the link in the thread to find out.


• Talk about--or just shudder at--the latest UK reality show "Geordie Shore."


• Two new Iron Chefs have been posted in Creative Writing: Ms. Kinnikufan's Helen Morgendoffer, M.D. and thatLONERchick's Termination Fail.

Of Music Festivals and Nuts

It's a double episode anniversary today: both "Road Worrier" and "It Happened One Nut" aired on this day in 1997 and 1999, respectively. Two of my all-time favorite lines from Daria came from each of those episodes. The first is "You have to pee, Daria? You can pee behind those trees. See those trees? You can pee behind there!" and the second is "Hey, look! Monster trucks and naked models! Naked, naked, naked!"

Both lines, I've found, are extremely versatile and can be quoted in a wide range of situations.

Anyone have a particular favorite line from either episode? Quote it in the comments while I post the latest fanfic!

• Another Lawndale's Episode, by Silver (part 2): "Things have a bad habit of getting weird when you're not looking. It's sort of like when you sign up for a lit course, and the teacher shows you an episode of South Park instead of going over the reading. That was a fairly accurate descriptor of Daria's morning. Except about a thousand times weirder. After all, mecha do not typically park themselves in front of a sane school on a sane Earth."


• Blood of Doves (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by thatLONERchick (parts 2 and 3): "In perfect sync, the duo eased silently through the shop, checking every shadow for The Employer's men as well as Stacy's friends. The only sound was their shallow breathing as the pair traversed the rows of the seemingly-abandoned art store, and the occasional splat of a drop of sweat hitting the floor. Finally they reached the storeroom door, and Stacy rolled her eyes. Her shoulders sagged visibly, the only clue to her immense relief. It, unfortunately, would be short-lived." (Part 3)


• A Cookie Story (Non-Daria), by Doggieboy (COMPLETE!): "Inside the wrapper was a single chocolate chip cookie. And definitely not the Nabisco/Keebler 'excuses' for a cookie, either. This cookie was large and had at least thirty chocolate chips. This wasn't something to be munched on at the mall, or absently ate while behind the wheel. No, this was something to lose yourself into, to savor its moistness and its chocolate goodness."


• Daria and the 'Rangers' (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria stalked alone through the streets of Angel Grove. Ever since the sudden move to the new city without Jane, she had been bereft of companionship and, to her dismay, sank into depression. Sure, the town was a nice place to live -- after all, giant monsters regularly demolished it. But with Jane around, it just wasn't the same thing. Suddenly, and peculiarly, she saw a star fall from the sky. She had to rub her eyes to confirm there wasn't just an unusually-shaped piece of debris in them."


• Daria is Raven's Apprentice, by project pegasus: "Raven: Daria, if things don't turn out well, I just want you to know that I'm sorry. Daria: Hey, this isn't all your fault. Raven: (smiling) Really? Daria: Yeah, we were dumb enough to follow you into this death trap, so in a way this is our faults too."


• Daria, or the Confession of a Single Lonely Male, by Arena del Sur: "My heart is feeding with the constant roar of the engine, exerting for turn four wheels without regret. In the hours of rural sacrifice they are seeing us, like an unattainable dream getting lost, getting lost. In the constant taking and bringing my pajarillo verde, adrift, driving the Accord I'm in full shining, living this dream."


• Daria/Power Rangers: Watching the Watchmen, by Charles RB (parts 1 - 3): "Daria found herself making sarcastic remarks and Quinn-baiting comments on auto-pilot as she tried to figure out a way for all the facts and rumours to make sense. The rest of the family decided it must be a hoax designed to terrorise them – “It's that dastard Saddam, he's fighting dirty this time!” cried her dad – but she could tell her parents wanted to believe it was a hoax rather than actually believed it. It was all confusion and conjuncture until the next day. That was the day a walking skeleton invaded an amusement park on live TV and the Power Rangers stopped him." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Daria the Hoosier, by Doggieboy (part 7): "The woman sat down in a nearby rocking chair and leaned forward slightly. 'You can talk to me, Daria,' she said. 'I may be an adult, but I can listen well and not be judgmental. After all, I do remember what it's like being a teenager.' She waited a few seconds, then added, 'I know that you and Jim are friends, but I also understand that there are some things girls just can't talk to guys about.' She smiled. 'Besides, it's better to get it out of your system.'"


• Daria's Big Hit (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by DIsaac (part 2): "Daria's Blog, The Hollywood Cynic is required reading for lovers of gossip and all thing of pop culture. So her job don't suck too much. It could have been worst - she could have been a teacher."


• Emerald Twilight, by Erin M. (parts 1 - 3): "A cruel smile crossed Rita's face. It was a small smile, but it was infinitely more terrifying than the cackling laugh which usually heralded her good moods. 'I'm more than all right, Fenster. In fact, I feel better than I have in years.' Rita swept an arm around the observation deck. 'I awoke with a moment of clarity, dear Fenster. I felt like my old self again. Like I did before that sanctomonious severed head imprisoned me. And finally, FINALLY, I was able to think clearly about our continued problem with the Power Rangers.'" (Part 2) (Part 3)


• The Enemy (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane were walking along, being sarcastic and whatnot as always. Suddenly, Jane turned her head as they were passing a park and saw a lone chicken standing by the monkey bars. It narrowed its blank eyes at the artist and seemed to sneer. 'Wait a minute,' Jane said, snarling. 'I know that chicken!'"


• Five Minutes to Midnight - 11:55, by untra (parts 12 - 16): "'Um, I... I believe I, uh...' My heart began to race, and the walls began to shake a little. The fluorescent bulbs above seemed brighter all of a sudden, and I continued to stammer mindlessly. Jane reached her hand out and placed it on my shoulder. 'Close your eyes and say what you feel,' Jane whispered." (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16)


• Green Dragon Rising, by Grifter74 (parts 1 - 3): "Grasping her anger like it was a physical object, Daria adjusted her bag and started to head to her new house. As Daria made her way down the stairs, she was bumped into and stumbled down the last few steps. She saw a flash of green cloth, felt a steading hand, and heard a mumbled apology. Glad to have a subject to unleash her anger on, she turned toward her victim, when a cry of 'Amiga' distracted her as she was pulled into a hug." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Homeless Daria Episode 3: A College Try Gives Me Blisters, by RX-87 (parts 5 - 8): "'Hey, Jane?' Daria said, meekly. 'Yeah?' 'I really am sorry about the other day.' 'It's nothing, don't worry about it. It's cool if you want to have more friends than just me. That'd be pretty creepy, me wanting to keep you all to myself.' Jane laughed." (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8)


• Jane Morgendorffer 2: The Middle School Years, by LadieT (part 3): "One afternoon in early October, Penny took a chance and invited Daria and Trent to spend the night. Much to everyone's surprise, Daria and Trent said yes. That Friday, after school let out, Penny picked up Daria and Trent and brought them back to their place. Daria still refused to go into her old room, so Penny decided they would crash on the living room couches after watching a couple of movies."


• Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: Cats Night Out, by RLobinske (part 2): "Even over the din of the party, Stacy's sensitive ears picked up the sound of purring and she quietly moved away from the party to seek out the sound. 'I'm so jealous of Daria finding those cute kittens,' she said to her self while listening, and also using her heightened smell to locate the cats. 'Oh,' Stacy said, surprised to see Fran almost asleep between the felines. 'That's where you got off to.' Fran said, 'Hi, Stacy. I'm still not comfortable around crowds, but I found a couple of friends to keep me company.'"


• Not So Different 58: 'Takes A Licking ...', by J-D (COMPLETE!): "The trouble was that although Sonny wasn't talking about the story to Jane or to Tom, he couldn't stick to a resolution never to refer to it again. He found himself raising the subject of his writing ability with his father. Luckily it only set the man off on a rant about the lack of qualification of teachers for judging such things, the specific he had in mind emerging as a teacher at his military school who hadn't liked a song Cadet Morgendorffer had written for a school musical. Sonny abandoned his father mid-rant. He would be better off letting Tom read the story."


• Not So Different 59: Stretching Limits, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Enjoyable though it was seeing Li squirm, Sonny did feel slight misgivings of his own at becoming a strikebreaker. He quelled them with the reflection that it wouldn't take much experience of his presence in the faculty lounge to make the principal desperate to settle with the union on any terms. Besides, he had to think about the effect on Quinn."


• Not So Different 60: False Impressions, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Sonny held up a hand to check her. 'Does Quinn look really bad in this picture?' 'Well—um—I guess so—I mean, I don't know—Quinn said it made her face look like one big freckle and—' Sonny held up his hand again. 'Your secret and your picture are safe from me. On condition I get the chance to look at it some time.' Stacy nodded breathlessly."


• Not So Different 61: Rivals For Attention, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "'Mom, now that Quinn ... says she's got a steady boyfriend, are you going to invite him to dinner as well? You know, to encourage her? You did tell her that once she had a steady boyfriend you'd love to invite him for dinner, and that's when she got one. And with her history she probably needs the encouragement.' 'You want to encourage your sister and her new steady boyfriend? That's what you want? Out of pure altruism?' Sonny looked at his mother. 'You're not going to believe that, are you.'"


• PIGS in Space (Plot Bunny Murder), by Roentgen: "'It must be some really crappy holiday,' Daria said. 'Listen. What kind of - ?' 'I'm not a bloody holiday,' the young man said. 'I'm England!' 'England?' Daria said. 'The entire country? That's not even possible.' 'Why not? You accepted Cupid and St. Patrick's Day, why not a country?'"


• Rita's Revenge (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "Rita's eye twitched and her teeth clenched. “Sure Brian, but aren't you forgetting something?” He looked at for a moment with a stupid ass look on his face like he was king of the world. She wanted to say “Listen you ugly pea-brained cave-man at the very least you could say please!” but she just shrugged and got up and got him the beer, however Rita had different plans..."


• Rude Awakening Ep. 7: Don't Sign Me Up!, by DIsaac (part 1): "JODIE: Alright, I have one more thing to cover before we are done. We need to talk about our company's involvement in the community. (EVERYBODY groins with disgust at the idea)"


• Singed Rainbow!verse Short: Daria's Revenge, by Lord Yellowtail (COMPLETE!): "'Jase? Jason! Snap out of it, bro,' Zack whispered under his breath, his normally wide and shining grin tight and grim. 'Time to face the music.' Jason suppressed a cringe, both at their fate and Zack's horrible sense of humor. He was the Red Ranger. He would not show fear in the face of his enemy. 'I can't believe I didn't see it coming,' he bemoaned."


• Unnamed story (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by JohnHWatson (COMPLETE!): "A ragged young woman, ignoring the armed agents, walked up to the glowing, apparently iced-over old Galaxie and slipped into the driver's seat. She caressed the steering wheel, and smiled seraphically. Trent Lane shouted out, 'Janey! What are you doing?' 'I thought I'd take it for a spin!' she called, happily."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef - Jodie the Inventor), by Chris Tucker (parts 3 - 6): "Jane's 'office' was huge. 20 feet on a side. Half the room was taken up with a drafting table and blackboards, and several lab tables. Bookcases full of reference works and journals lined the walls. The other half was graced with a large steel desk, a low table with several chairs around it, more bookcases and an ancient, battered leather couch. An equally ancient refrigerator and a complex of laboratory glassworks and a Bunsen burner filled a small table. It was the can of coffee and the bag of sugar that was the indication that the glassware was some manner of coffee maker." (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)


• Unnamed story (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'What the hell?!' the raven-haired girl screamed in shock and anger. Even though she had already been curled into a ball in the corner of the room, Stacy somehow managed to shrink back even further in the face of her girlfriend's sudden fury. 'It's- it's not-' she stammered. 'I didn't-'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by midnightstorm (COMPLETE!): "Jane looked at Brittany oddly. 'Brittany, what are you doing?'"


• Your Local News, by Lord Yellowtail (COMPLETE!): "VJ shook her head to clear her thoughts, and turned back to look at the TV. She only had a few seconds to stare at it before her Daddy squeaked and fumbled for the remote and turned it off, and her eyes went wide. 'Daddy,' she said, padding over to him on bare feet, enjoying the feeling of carpet between her toes and making sure to avoid the spilled martini, 'who's Eric Sch -- Schrec --' she huffed and gave up, pushing her bushy hair out of her eyes in frustration. She couldn't figure out how to pronounce that. 'Who's that Eric guy, and why were they showing him with a picture of Mommy?'"


• Zombie Cards...or, A New Weapon, by Doggieboy (part 1): "For a few seconds, she listed carefully, but could only hear the people inside the school building. Many people criticized Angela Li for the money she spent in making Lawndale High an actual fortress. That included soundproofing. When it all came in handy, however, many people praised her for her insight and dedication in seeing it through. Which made her trip to New York City the day before the dead rose kind of ironic."

"My neck modeling career is over!"

It's National Pistachio Day! Crunch some pistachio nuts with your lunch. Buy them by the bunch. Send them to friends far away to munch. Especially send some to Quinn, who is allergic to the dye and will most assuredly appreciate the gesture!

In the meantime, though, pull up a bowl of pistachios and enjoy this fanfic update!

• Bound to Highland, by RLobinske (part 3): "Helen walked down the hallway to them. 'I'm sure you couldn't help but hear. I don't think we will be hearing from my family any time soon.' 'So, we're not going to the wedding?' Quinn asked to confirm. 'If Mother had her way right now, we wouldn't be allowed in the same state.'"


• Cafe Digesto (Pie, Pie, My Darling), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Why can't I just sell chocolate door-to-door?' Daria swallowed, to prevent the sudden influx of drool from escaping and making her look like an ass. 'Well, Ms. Morgendorffer, I took the liberty of examining your permanent record, and it seems there was an...incident in your past related to candy fundraising.'"


• Canto Tre, by untra (COMPLETE!): "I had packed only a few things I really cared about. Just some shirts, a pair of jeans, a few dark skirts, boots, socks, a sweater, and an olive green jacket. I brought a few old VHS tapes, a few CDs, and about fifty of my favorite books. I packed a small box of my favorite stationary. I took a few old videogames I no longer played and an old desktop computer. Everything else I threw away."


• Daria is Raven's Apprentice, by project pegasus: "Staci: Was that when she and you were fighting over Aaron Carpenter, former lead singer of the Eromenos Boys? Hilary Dorff: (embarassed) Yes, it was. Staci: Didn't he turn out to be gay or something?"


• Day of the Daria, by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "'"Could be worse?"' Daria said, turning and pointing the shotgun at a spot where Tom's legs meet his body. 'How could they be worse, Tom?! We're trapped in the middle of a zombie apocalypse and my sister is lost out there somewhere, Not to mention the lack of food and ammo we currently have. How could it be worse?!' Panicking as he realized the safety was off on Daria's shotgun, Tom quickly backpedaled. 'Your right, it can't get much worse than this.'"


• Dreams, by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "The Highland Dream and The Greyfield Dream both start the same way. She is sitting in her refrigerator box 'house', reading her favorite book, 'Black Beauty'. She hears her father calling her name."


• The Flab Brat (Pie, Pie, My Darling), by Smijey: "'Look what I made, Kevin!' Quinn called out. Daria and Kevin turned at the same time, to behold Quinn, bearing a chocolate cake on a platter. 'CAKE!' Daria roared, and lunged forward. Quinn, seeing the inhuman look in her sister's eyes, shrieked and accidentally tossed the cake in the air."


• For Better or For Worse, For Richer or For Poorer, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "Erin lifted her hand to read one word: 'INTELLIGENCE.' 'Ohhh,' she murmured. 'You mean you work for, like, the--' Brian shook his head quickly to silence her, then took back the napkin and dunked it in a water glass. 'I can't go into details here. However, my apartment is secure. If you'd allow me to escort you there, it should be safe to explain.'"


• General Semantics, Private Angst, by gwrtheyrn (part 36): "The Monstrator, in her heart of hearts, felt disaster drawing near. Far from ensuring peace, her mission seemed certain to be the spark to set off open war. Enro apparently thought that he had a chance to conquer the Galaxy by force. Even without her agents' reports from the locus rem, it would have been obvious that the dreadful man had deliberately provoked the current crisis. But there was something he wanted, something he didn't have yet. She wasn't sure what it was, but had a good idea where to look for it."


• Illumination ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "Daria opened her eyes and looked at her father's concerned face. 'Judith...' she whispered. Jake nodded gravely. 'This has been a long time coming, kiddo,' he said. 'Things are moving and they're going to accelerate soon. There's people trying to slow her down and even stop her, but they know deep down they won't be able to.'"


• Invaders, by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "As bullets bounce off my skin, I rush forward and grab one of them by the face. He screams as my fingers find their way into his eye sockets, popping the squishy orbs within. I easily haul his larger form over to the nearest wall and smash him into it and then through it, sending out a spray of brightly painted concrete, followed by his slightly crushed body and then by me as I compress my body down to fit through the hole."


• Is It 'Mania Yet?, by TheExcellentS (COMPLETE!): "O'Neill: 'Thompson throwing the big punches as only he can here.' Barch: 'Yeah. Everyone else's punches actually hit once in a while.' O'Neill: 'Are you watching the same match that I am?' Barch: 'This match is still going? I was hoping to catch a nap before Upchuck's public execution... er... I mean title match.'" (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)


• Lawndale Seven Chapter Two, by Wassersauefer (part 1): "There had been happy times in the live of Tiff'aany, called Tiff by most. She remembered when she had been playing with her brood sisters and brothers, when she had time to be a child and when she had gotten her first birthday present. Sometimes she even remembered the face of her mother and sometimes she dreamed of a gentle voice singing softly to her and strong arms rocking her to sleep. Back when she had been named Blum, before her gift had been noticed."


• Life After Highland (Iron Chef: Lawndale State), by LadieT (part 18): "'...I knew we weren't going to be anything more than a house band. So I quit and decided to focus on school. Trent felt as though I was abandoning my dream - I tried to explain to him that, for me, being a musician was a hobby. I should have never accepted his marriage proposal.'"


• Mad Dog's Legacy Chapter 1: First Impressions, by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "'I've got this paper my mom told me to give you if anything like psych tests came up.' She pulled out a sheet of paper and handed it to Li, who skimmed over it quickly. 'I assure you, our test has nothing to do with this at all. If your mother has an issue with this, tell her to call me, but in the meanwhile you will take the test just like the others. 'Dammit,' Daria whispered, too softly to be heard." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)


• Mad Dog's Legacy Chapter 2: Party Animals, by Hyrin (parts 1 and 2): "Brittany looked up and, for the first time, realized who she was sitting with. 'EEP! Please, don't hurt me! I'm sorry that Kevvy was such a jerk to you in class, but that was still really mean of you to call me that...that....mean name!'" (Part 2)


• Promises, by LadieT (part 6): "Jane sat down and gently took Quinn's hand. She gazed around the room for a moment, watching and listening to the machines that surrounded her sister-in-law and friend. Then, she stared down at the petite red-head who was lying on the bed in front of her. Jane fought back the tears as she looked at the casts and the bandages and the breathing tube that was forcing air into Quinn's lungs."


• Quinn's Code - 02: Invite of the Geek, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "He turned to Quinn. 'Hey, Quinn, what about you?' 'You want me to go to your girlfriend's party?' she asked. 'Sure!' Kevin said, unfazed. 'Sure,' Quinn said. 'My first real party in Lawndale! I hope it doesn't get as rough as those in Highland!'"


• Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "'Sounds good to me. And speaking of dark nightmares, Upchuck just walked in. And he seems rather agitated!' It was an understatement. His eyes were rapidly moving from right to left and back, quickly scanning the bar and lounge areas to see if some vicious enemy was parked in the shadows waiting for him to get within range and drag him by the freckled neck to a waiting car and hideous death. He breathed a small measure of relief when he saw no one matching that description."


• Second Rate ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "JUDITH: If I'm gonna get my ass kicked by a version of a co-dependent little twerp who followed me around at summer camp, I want her to at least be competent about it. AMELIA: (fumes) JUDITH: Awww...whatsa matter? Is widdle Amelia gonna cwy? Come on, get mad. I've seen you scared. Let's see what you're like when you get pissed. Come on...COME ON, YOU STUPID BITCH! LET ME HAVE IT! OR ARE YOU JUST A COMPLETE FRAUD?"


• Someone Else's World, by Charles RB (parts 1 - 4): "She was so busy thinking about that, she noticed, too late, that her mother was watching her, and looking distraught that she wasn't eating. Daria froze – she rarely saw her mother like this, never felt comfortable or sure how to resolve it – and realised, too late, that was entirely the wrong move. Helen looked sadder and sadder, and finally couldn't look at Daria. She thinks I'm doing this deliberately. Why would-" (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)


• Squad 88 (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Attention, students - this is your principal! As you are well aware, this is something we have expected for a long time! Return to your classrooms immediately, and do not, I repeat, do not leave the school grounds until we can be sure that we can return all of you to your homes safety. Just remember, students - your peaceful behavior brings glorrry to Llllllanwdale High!'"


• Summer Fling, by GingerLove84 (parts 2 and 3): "TIFFANY: Hey Saandiii. Isn't thaaat the guitaaar playeeeer you said you were datiiing? SANDI (flustered): Tiffany dear, you must have misheard me. TIFFANY: Why is heee with Daaariaa? Did she steeeeal him? (Bt) That's sooooo wrooooong." (Part 3)


• Unnamed story ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Raskolnikov (COMPLETE!): "The man held the doll for a moment, and he took out something from his pocket. Clenched in his fists, as if he was hiding something precious from a harmful presence, he took whatever he had in his hand to his mouth, and for a moment it looked like he was going to kiss it. But no, less than an inch of his apparent goal, he stopped the trajectory of his hand and held it. He breathed on it. And then he put whatever he had in his hand inside the doll, and started digging on the hard ground with his bare hands."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Objectivization of Women), by Raskolnikov (COMPLETE!): "'Considering that... let's start the first Fashion Objectivism Club meeting. The first issue of the day: tangerine or orange? I think that-' With the sound of the Word 'orange' Stacy started sobbing desconsolately. 'What is it now, Stacy?', Sandi asked with impatience. 'Sorry... It's just... I miss Quinn! Why she couldn't see the truth?! Why did she have to abandon us??' Her sobs started to increase in volumen until they become a high-pitched bawling."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chief: Amnesia), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "The first thing I remember is pain. Blinding pain. I remember that I threw up because of how much my head hurt. I remember crying and whimpering, begging, praying for death so that the pain would stop. I open my eyes, and through the horrible blur I make out a face. Black hair, or is it brown? Wait, its two faces, staring down at me. Am I on the ground? Yes, I am. How did that happen?"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chief: Amnesia), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "She scoured her mind and began to panic as she found huge gaps, completely empty. No name, no past, no sense of self, no anything. There was knowledge, but it was all generalized. She knew what a car was. She knew how a light bulb worked. She knew how the concept of Manifest Destiny had been used to justify the Spanish-American War. But everything about herself was gone. Simply (help me help me oh god help me) gone."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "After dinner, everybody put on their best clothes to greet Mad Dog's brother, and waited. Finally, after half an hour, there was a knock on the door. Mad Dog put on a scowl, walked over to the door and, after a moment, opened it. A ball of yarn hit him squarely in the face. 'Meow meow, brother!' came an effeminate voice."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "She blinked. Her eyes darted around the room, took in the sterile white walls and beeping equipment, the paper-thin gown that barely hid her body from indiscriminate display and realized she'd found herself in a hospital. Her mind was a whirlwind of panic when she realized she didn't even know who She was, or how she'd come to be in the situation she found herself. So she blinked; it was all she could really do."


• What Did You Do During The War, Daria?, by echopapa (part 1): "Jane watched as her friend's face became solemn. It's still strange to watch this, she thought. I've seen lots of people take serious stuff so lightly, but she puts her very heart and soul into it every day. Daria held out her hand so that the ring was touching the battery. 'In brightest day . . .' she began."

"Sometimes you feel like a nut...."

Daria and Jane, wearing peanut outfits for It's a Nutty, Nutty, Nutty World at Lawndale Mall, are our mascots for National Nut Day. The image is from Pinhead (thanks!), from the Sarcastathon 3000 retrospective of Daria episodes. (More on National Nut Day here. More on where this post's title came from here.)

Psychologist, futurologist, dolphinologist, author, and LSD guru Timothy Leary, for whom Willow and Coyote's three sequential dogs were named, was born this day 89 years ago. Awesome actor Jeff Goldblum was born today 57 years ago.


FANDOM NuZ!

• Angelinhel has come up with a killer Iron Chef for Halloween, based on the Stephen King story, The Mist. Nice.
  
• Brother Grimace has located a clever cartoon "tribute" to Daria on YouTube.
• On PPMB, GlitterShrooms asks the musical question: What if the show was "Beavis, Butthead, and Daria"? Post your answer there.
• Ninetwelve needs help with the casting call for his next fic, "Night of the Living Daria."
• Remember to read Quiverwing's post about the rules for the 2009 Daria Fanworks Awards.
• Want to get a fanfic of any fandom as a Christmas gift? Read what surprises Coonassblondie has in store, on SFMB.

Got caught napping while a busload of new fanfiction rolled into town...

PPMB

• Finn Morgendorffer 9: Legends and Losers, by HolyGrail2007 (Parts 1, 2, and 3): All four guys stood on the field for an extended moment, clearly lost in their own thoughts. Finn’s brow furrowed when he received the news from Coach Gibson. So... he died, Finn thought.
• Invisible Love, by Charliefox2012 (Parts 5 and 6): “So,” Quinn said with a smile, scrutinizing Duncan. He looked at her confused. “What?” “How was your date with Jane?” Quinn asked smirking. (FF.net)
  
• John Lane 43: We're on a Mission, by Richard Lobinske (Part 2): "Lucky bastard." "Very lucky." "That's not what I meant. I have to endure and entire day of mother/daughter bonding and you get to stay at home, ignoring Dad while he watches football."
• Regifted, by Ajar (Part 20): “Now, we need to get ready for class. Remember, we need to be close to each other continuously. That includes your shower.”
• Two Halves 5: Mall Rat Blues, by Dark Kuno (Part 1): “Good grief,” stated Jane as she closed the front door of her house behind her. “I’m not the biggest fan of air-headed perky model types but that was pretty bad, even for an air-headed perky model type.”
• Unnamed story (Halloween IC: The Mist), by Disco316 (COMPLETE!): "What's that mist coming our way?" "Oh God! Let's get out of here!"
  
• Unnamed story (New Jane shipper fic - untitled), by Coonassblondie (Part 1): Jane sighed again as she habitually glanced at the bed where her best friend, Daria Morgendorffer, would normally lie, reading a book while Jane painted. Jane caught another unspoken comment and swallowed it past the lump that was forming in her throat.
• Unnamed story (TMI+20: Lawndale after Three Mile Island goes BOOM!), by TAG (COMPLETE!): "Brittany and Kevin, creators of a new generation of humanity. This is their story."
  

Perverted Squirrels!

"Road Worrier" appeared for the first time 12 years ago, and "It Happened One Nut" 10 years ago. Time flies, doesn't it?

The Roswell UFO incident took place in New Mexico 62 years ago today. Wonder if one of Artie's ancestors was kidnapped there. In a related event, SF writer Robert A. Heinlein was born 102 years ago today. A few Daria crossovers exist with Heinlein connections, particularly this masterpiece.

PPMB

• Cold Comfort, by Doggieboy (Part 11): In the hour and a half since Daria left the house, the skies had darkened slightly and the rain was spotty. She climbed up, then down, several hills on her hike to the northwest and finally came to a rusted chain link fence that blocked her from making any further progress. She saw a sign a few hundred feet to her west and moved towards it. (SFMB)
• Daylight: Fallen from Grace: I Should Have Been Home Yesterday, by Disco316 (Chapter 10): Mr. Secretary: As you are likely aware, on 1/1/2000, an ELE occurred that simultaneously destroyed every electronic device and electric wire in the Washington D.C. area. We have since determined that the area of effect includes, at the least, all of the northeastern states and several to the south. We have yet to find an unaffected region, and fear that this may have been a global event.
  
• Daylight: When Worlds Divide, by Lorenzo Sauchelli (Part 3): Kyle Armalin kicked the door open and stomped his way to Daria’s desk. He was breathing hard and glaring daggers at her. Daria calmly stared at the boy in front of her. She waited for him to tell her what he was up to. When that didn’t happen, so she decided a raised eyebrow was in order. Kyle growled under his breath. “You’re one irritating woman, did anyone ever tell you that?”
  
• Legion of Lawndale Heroes Special: Tokusatsu Team Up! by Lorenzo Sauchelli (Part 11): “You mean, that crazy-ass bitch could pick up that weapon and open a hole to another dimension or something?”
• Rolling the Dice, by Ajar (Part 1): “What if the bet was about me accomplishing something that would be satisfying if I succeed?” “Such as?” “Perhaps I get someone at school to do something they'd never do. Something only a brain would do.”
• Tales of the Ringbearers: With New Responsibility, by Richard Lobinske (Part 7): The base commander paced back and forth in his office. "Pardon my skepticism, but the Corps of Ringbearers has explored the Multiverse for over nine hundred years and we've never heard the slightest thing about your agency."
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Great Flood), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "And I can't go out with Corey and Cliff on the same night, so Sandi told me to get Stacy to sub on the date with Corey, but Stacy's got a date with Robert, and anyway, she doesn't like Corey, and I don't want to make her go out with someone she doesn't want to go out with, but then..."
• Unnamed story (Second Coming of the New Ideas Thread), by Trscroggs (Part 1): “At ease men,” The general began, “We have a live one this time. And it isn’t going to be a pretty one.” The general let the men shift uncomfortably for a moment before continuing. “This time we’re going after an actual Guardian, class unknown.”

Sometimes You Feel Like a Nut...

If I told you today was both National Nut Day and the 88th anniversary of the birth of LSD advocate Dr. Timothy Leary (for whom the Yeagers' German shepherds were named), you would probably believe me, and that's good because it's true. You can celebrate National Nut Day by clicking here and getting some ideas, but frankly it's okay with me if you only pet a dog for Dr. Leary's birthday and not, you know, take drugs or stuff. Dr. Leary is buried in Earth orbit. Seriously. Anyone remember the Moody Blues' song about him? Anyone remember Dr. Leary talking with dolphins, or trying to? They don't talk much. Oh, and superstar Jeff ("Must Go Faster!") Goldblum is 56 today, being one of my favorite actors up there with Will Smith.

More stuff soon. Must go faster.

PPMB

• Blood, Sweat, and Cheers, by Kristen Bealer (Part 8): The look on Brittany's face was unreadable, but it made Daria feel strangely nervous.
  
• But Why? by Legendeld (Part 1): “Leave me alone!” Daria cried out as she inched closer to the edge of Lawndale High School’s roof.
• Daylight: When the Ball Dropped, by Disco316 (Part 1): “Okay," said Stacy, "so if I have this straight, I spend the night with you in your fallout shelter. If anything happens, we’re safe, and we don’t die virgins."
• The Other Side of Time: Unfinished Business, by The Sidhe (continued): Bad news travels VERY quickly.
• Snuff the Rooster, by Cypher (continued): “Wet Willie!”
• Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (Part 2): "Careful,” warned Daria. “That scrunchy might be loaded."

Shipper's Delight

"Road Worrier" premiered on MTV just eleven years ago today, and "It Happened One Nut" did the same nine years ago at this time. Both are favorites of Daria/Trent shippers. I thought the latter was funnier, though the former gets higher ratings from fans.

My favorite scene in RW is when Jane can tell Daria is thinking up sarcastic remarks but doesn't dare say them aloud. My favorite scene in IHON comes when Daria and Jane walk through the Lawndale Mall looking for jobs but, of course, deliberately miss all the "help wanted" signs. And I loved Joanna. I need to use her in a fanfic sometime. If you have a favorite scene from either episode, or a favorite line of dialogue, put it in the Comments section for all to admire.

By the way, both episodes' pages on DariaWiki need some work. Please contribute! I'll do my part soon. (LATE ADD: Okay, I added something. Your turn.)

Fanfic Quiz: In Brother Grimace's story, "The One Day We Forget," who died on this day in 1976?

Richard Lobinske has again updated the 2008 Visual FanWorks Listing. Outstanding! How far behind am I on updating the fanfic list? Oh. Better get to it this month.

I forgot earlier to mention that C.F.'s masterful essay on Outpost Daria about Daria's role in Beavis and Butt-head has been updated! Read and celebrate!

Few recent stories have inspired the level of feedback and argument/discussion that "Common People" has managed to ignite. Kudos to NightGoblyn for whacking the hornet's nest. You rule!

PROBLEM: For reasons unknown, someone has posted a Danny Phantom story to the Daria section in FF.net. Any ideas on how to get it (re-)moved?


FF.net

• Box to the Future, by Smileyfax (Part 6): Things just get worse and worse, spiraling totally out of control. I love it. (Doubt that the Morgendorffers' home in Highland had two floors, judging from the pic in "Boxing Daria," but who cares. Much goodness here.)
• The Long Shot, by livingsacrifice22 (Part 1): "Oh, get off it, Quinn. You had nothing to do with Stacy's new-found love or whatever." But Quinn doesn't agree, and she becomes a matchmaker. You know this is going to end badly, so start reading!

PPMB

• Calling Calliope, by Dennis (Part 1): It's Tiffany. On Dega Street. With an old acquaintance from "Lucky Strike." OMG OMG OMG.
  
• The Cynic and The Defender, by Doggieboy (Part 6): The knife in his back came as a total surprise.
• New Life, by legendeld (Part 9): “Your folks are really cool,” Trent said after arriving at the restaurant. “They’re sex fiends,” Quinn grumbled.
  
• Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): "I charge extra for stupidity." —Luhrman. [Another immortal fanfic line!]
• Too Late, by legendeld (COMPLETE!): Angst. It's not just for breakfast, lunch, and dinner anymore. Mmmmmmmmmmm.
  

A Cold Frosty Sundae with Nuts

It's snowing outside. I thought we were done with that crap. Rats. Let's see, what's new online. . . . billions and billions of webpages and nothing's—oh, here we go:

Richard Lobinske presses on his mysterious journey into the outer limits of the twilight zone of DariaWiki, adding new pages everywhere. Thanks, man!

The Current PPMB Debate: The importance of the cartoon format to Daria, put forth by Operculum. Add your opinions on how it would have been different if it had used live actors.

From the depths of Fortress CINCGREEN comes an examination of Quinn and Sandi's roles in Daria, and which one is truly more popular.

An all-female (as far as I can tell) message board/blog page/whatever devoted to Daria has turned up, on a site called, um, Team Sugar. Okay, sure, why not. Enjoy.

Richard Lobinske updated the 2008 Visual FanWorks Listing today. Thank you again! Enjoy the fruits of the artists' harvest.

Two significant honors that the Daria show won in its time: In TV Guide's list of the 50 greatest cartoon characters of all time, Daria is #41, just above Wonder Woman. Not bad! And Daria was chosen as one of the "Top 10 Cartoon Nerds Ever" in a poll conducted by G4 TV, which of course is geekness cubed to the nerd power.

And the PPMB updates!

PPMB

• Avalon, by legendeld (Parts 4 and 5): Heading into X-Men territory, crossed over with King Arthur. A wild ride in progress.
• Daria d'Arc, by LSauchelli (Parts 2 and 3): God continues to micromanage Daria's reality, with unexpected results.
• Falling Into College 61: Latitudes, by Richard Lobinske (Part 22): Jake, Michael, Mike, and Q form a karaoke singing group right after Quinn gets laid. These events are not related.
• John Lane 33: Tiptoe Through the Ivy, by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): Daria reveals her deepest secrets, but Quinn remains dirt-free. Then, family role-playing: “Helen? Jake? Hello? You’re upsetting the other guests.”
• A Little Vacation, by Doggieboy (Part 16): Daria tells her mother the truth. And her mother believes her. What miracles lie ahead?
• The Misery Chicks, by NightGoblyn (Part 15): Great spot to leave us hanging at the end, NG!
• My Sons, by legendeld (Part 6): “I can’t believe my parents think I could be pregnant,” Daria said as she tore through another slice of pizza.
• The Other Side Of Time: And All That We've Won, by The Sidhe (Part 4): Southern Comfort time with the generals.
• Size Does Matter, by BlackHole (Part 17): The Teen Titans remain suspicious, and the student body remains amazed.
• Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): The assassination of Grand Duchess Daria Yakovlevna, formerly Morgendorffer, as written by parties yet unknown and performed by snipers, animal murderers, bikers and inmates to be named later, only the bikers turn out to be the good guys, I think.
• Turnabout Confusion Part II: All the King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): Some people like to twist the knife. Some people deserve the extra twist.

Finally, we have Scenes That Should Be: Brains for Rent (more strangeness), and the ever-popular...

• Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Have: Dawn of a New Horror (continued): Come on, get up, get down with the sickness!!!

More tomorrow. Party on, ppl!

A Reaction You Didn't Expect

The screencap at right is a revealing one, because it shows the only time in "It Happened One Nut" that Quinn Morgendorffer expresses fear at being within arm's reach of a boa constrictor. In fact, when she later discovers Joanna the python has escaped, she doesn't run off. She places a half dozen puppies on a table out of harm's way, taking time at one point to walk over and look into the empty snake container, wondering aloud how it could possibly have gotten away once she took the lid off its cage. Other people in the store run. She doesn't.

Still later, she is still in the pet shop with the snake still on the loose somewhere inside, organizing the Three Js into a search party to capture the boa. When Joey is caught by Joanna and is running around Lawndale Mall screaming with the snake wrapped around him, he passes right by Quinn, who doesn't blink an eyelash and merely watches him run off, pursued by the other two Js and the store owner.

We have definitely underestimated Quinn's willpower, fearlessness, and poise in the face of danger. She probably gets that from dating so much. (She did once run away when she thought the Rattling Girl was coming, but she was afraid then of becoming unpopular, not of losing her life.)

Alien Nation

Looking for an extraterrestrial alien for your next science-fiction Daria fanfic . . . but you want the alien to be in canon? Well, look no further. Daria presents several different aliens in addition to the standard greys (which appear in The Daria Diaries). From "Esteemsters" (at left), we have the model of a giant purple insectoid alien at the UFO convention in Lawndale, at the show's end (Daria and Helen shown for size comparison), and from a SSW show on "It Happened One Nut" we have the four-legged green alien with three eyestalks, looking for a bathroom (at right). Several other alien species appear on the show, but we'll content ourselves with these for now. (The green alien supplied the basic idea for the nuke boxes in "A Hard Days' Night.")