Mmm...Processed Chemicals....

Looks like Tom's in trouble again, and all because he just couldn't resist celebrating National Junk Food Day. I feel like a guy with as much money as he's got could afford to just keep a stockpile of snacks on hand, couldn't he?

Today is also the anniversary of both episodes "The Misery Chick" in 1997 and "Jake of Hearts" in 1999. Tommy Sherman died in one and Jake had a brush with death in the other. And in both, Daria has to deal with people pestering her even more than usual. Death sucks when you're an introvert.

Fandom News!

• Imagine Stacy at Schloss Morgendorffer.


• Discuss the upcoming documentary film My Old School.


• What do you consider Daria's most touching scene(s)?

A Junky Sort of Day

Tom chose the wrong way to celebrate National Junk Food Day, because Jane is most likely going to kill him and use his remains as an alternate art project. Enjoy plenty of ZooZoo Drops, Juicy Joes, fries, pizza, and whatever else you can find today!

Today is also the anniversary of "The Misery Chick" in 1997 and "Jake of Hearts" in 1999. Both episodes dabbled a little on the dark side, with Tommy Sherman dying in one and Jake having a brush with death in the other, but I don't remember a lot of junk food in either.

Fanfic Update!

• Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 42): "Erin had wondered if she would ever get used to sleeping in a moving bed. Now Athena’s gentle rocking seemed so relaxing, she wondered if she would ever be able to sleep in a steady bed again."


• Heavenly Wuss (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by Lady Evil (COMPLETE!): "'Look, maybe we just jumped into this dating stuff too fast.' said Daria. 'Maybe we need to take a break.'"


• Journey into Misery, by Captain Marbles (part 4): "It was a dark and stormy night, and in Sloatstown, somewhere in the Midwest, thirteen people - seven women and six men - sat around a round table marked by a pentagram in a darkened room lit only by thirteen black candles."

"Darwin's the monkey guy, right? I like monkeys."

Joey, Jeffy, and Jamie are making an effort to recreate the Scopes Monkey Trial, which was decided on this day in 1925. I think they might have missed the point just a bit, but I'll give them points for trying.

Today is also National Junk Food Day, so it's time to load up on ZooZoo Drops, Juicy Joes, or whatever your unhealthy food of choice might be. Mrs. Johanssen will probably have some chocolate if she can get her hands on some. As for Daria and Jane? As if you had to ask. Pizza, of course!

Finally, this is the anniversary of both "The Misery Chick" and "Jake of Hearts," which aired on this day in 1997 and 1999. Both episodes delved into issues of death and mortality, both only one of them ended with Jake wishing a merry Christmas to a garden gnome.

Fandom News!

• Discuss the news about Senator John McCain's brain tumor.


• Vote in the Deadliest Warrior poll between Lucas McCain and Grizzly Adams.


• Read Roentgen's take on the new TV series from HBO: "Confederacy".


• Kuriamo22 is looking for Daria and Mack fanfics.

I'm Sure the Fashion Club Hates this Holiday

Tom just celebrated National Junk Food Day by stuffing his face full of gummi bears. Jane's about to celebrate by killing him for eating her art supplies. Let's all grab some ZooZoo Drops and Juicy Joes and watch the carnage unfold!

Speaking of brushes with death, today is also the anniversary of both "The Misery Chick" in 1997 and "Jake of Hearts" in 1999. Tommy Sherman died, and Jake nearly joined him two years later.

Fanfic Update!

• ASPS, by PrecambrianStudios (part 71): "On a Saturday morning, Gage, wearing only a set of black briefs, sat on a stool in Harris Studios, where he patched up an old leather jacket."


• ASPS 2, by PrecambrianStudios (part 17): "Nevertheless, Roan was a people person and she knew it; that was also why she was a chief recruiter for the Mafia. She'd managed to induct seven new members in the past year alone."


• Daria, Jane, and a new sick sad world, by SpookyZalost (part 1): "Daria was heading back to Lawndale, a place she hadn't been since she left this dump to move on with her life nearly a decade and a half ago."


• Is This Adulthood?, by Princess_Pasta (part 9): "I ran my hands under warm water and scrubbed them with dish detergent while my mind wandered to more important matters. Specifically, where the hell Daria was."


• Mine, by Vukodlak (part 10): "After the whole kiss incident things had been awkward between Jane and Daria but after a summer apart they'd been trying to patch things up but the guilt was making it impossible for them to return to normal while Daria had come clean of her betrayal right away Jane had only just worked up the courage to confess her own."


• Old Shoe (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, uh, Jane,' Quinn said. 'It's Quinn.' 'Yeah, I know who you are,' Jane said. 'So what do you want?' 'Jane, I kissed your boyfriend.'"


• Passion For Fashion (Iron Chef: It's always the quiet ones who...), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "Tiffany Blum-Deckler knew that if anyone from the Fashion Club could see her now, she'd be kicked out immediately. Part of her thought that wouldn't be such a bad thing."


• Tambourine Girl, by ashk09 (part 1): "Not for the first time that night, Stacy Rowe wondered what the hell she was doing stomping her hooves out here; the mud was ankle-deep, and her dark blue tennies were glomming into the mire so much that she was probably going to have to be air-lifted to safety once the concert came to an end."

Got Any Juicy Joes?

Snackers rejoice! Today is National Junk Food Day, and Daria and Tom are sharing some "borrowed" candy in celebration. Have some junk food of your choice today...dibs on the chocolate!

This is also a double anniversary: "The Misery Chick" and "Jake of Hearts" both aired on this day in 1997 and 1999. Tommy Sherman died and Jake had a brush with death. Just goes to show you that life is short...eat more junk food.

Fanfic Update!

• Break the Storm (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by SacredDust (COMPLETE!): "Jane Lane won't remember it, but it is her at her very best. Everything she loves about being an artist will trace back to this day."


• Bro!Tom learns he has a....... (IC: Tom Sloane, Lax Bro TAKEDOWN!), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Ok so I had just finished tellin' my Pops all about this hot slam piece that I nailed the night before when he dropped a HUGE ass bomb on my ass!"


• Crossed Spiral (IC: Hell is Crossed People), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Outside the building, Daria and Quinn could hear random screaming. 'That doesn't sound very good.' 'You go first.' 'You go first.' 'Together.'"


• The Dale of Lawn, by Wassersauefer (part 17): "Everyone knew that it had just been a question of time before the Warlock and the Archmage would clash, Overlord Daria and Archmage Theodor. Despite all their forces, all their plots, all their carefully laid out plans, in the end it had to come down to a simple, or not so simple, match between two masters of the magic arts."


• Daria+Stacy fluff, by Astrocar82 (part 5): "Daria and Jane were walking to school feeling that the world may be a slightly less crappy place than they had previously thought."


• DW: Doctor & Sarah 01: Deadly Assassin, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Inside the TARDIS, the Doctor saw Sarah leave the console room into the corridors. He turned to the scanner. 'Right outside the capitol itself. I'm in trouble now.'"


• Dylan, by J-D (part 23c): "'You're not medieval', said one boy, looking Rod up and down, in his modern-day dress. 'No', said Rod, 'but you'd be surprised what information we can come up with just the same', and Dylan realised what was going on."


• Earlsteemsters (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: MY EYES THEY BURN!!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "The window exploded and three bullets embedded themselves next to O'Neill's head."


• Forty (Of All The People That Won't Be Missed), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "'Look at that fancy car honey.' 'I see it baby' 'Let's go get it.'"


• Is it the 41st century yet?, by baelparagon (part 2): "'Stacy Report.' A voice came out of the vox caster in her room, causing the young women to jerk up 'L-Lady Inquisitor?' 'No, it's the flying Dutchman. How close are we to transit?'"


• Love is Strange, by Shiva (part 5): "The next morning proved to be a welcome relief from half-remembered dreams best not dwelt on."


• A Man and His Box, by ThanatosRW (part 7): "'Don't worry, Ms. Landon. I've stopped it by reversing the polarity of the neutron flow.'"


• Movie Night with Jane, Todd and Trent (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Why, oh God WHY?!), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "Jane loved movie night, the whole ritual of it."


• My Little Quinny, by SacredDust (part 1): "'Listen girls,' Quinn said firmly. 'You know as well as I do that we need a good grade on this project to pass Multimedia Studies class, and it's due tomorrow morning. We HAVE to sneak into the AV Room! It's the only way!'"


• Rise of the Atoner, by macross (parts 7 and 8): "The first two weeks after the shootout had been the hardest for Courtney." (Part 8)


• Something (Slightly) Wicked Chapter 2, by macross (part 4): "'Mom's working late on some discrimination lawsuit, and won't be back till eight, and Dad's in D.C. till at least 8:30. Why do you ask?' she asked. Ally grinned, and produced a small zip-lock bag from her satchel, containing two very fat joints. 'Cause I thought we might have some fun,' the freshman girl said."


• Tom Sloane, Lax Bro, by Shiva (part 13): "in the safety and comfort of his bedroom, Mack is calling someone on his cellphone"


• T&T (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: MY EYES THEY BURN!!), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Tom Sloane opened the front door of Sloane Manor, having been waiting for the doorbell to ring. On the stoop was a Chinese-American girl in a blue dress who looked at him with vapid cow-like eyes and drawled, 'Hiiii Toooom!'"


• Turnabout is Fair Play (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "What do you think of when you think of Heaven?"


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: MY EYES THEY BURN!!), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "'Okay,' Jane admitted plainly. 'Maybe messing with that weird amp Wind built for Trent wasn't the smartest thing we could have done.'"


• Unnatural Born Killer (IC: Todd and Jane Ianuzzi -Takedown), by LadieTAG (COMPLETE!): "'Uncle Todd - Uncle Todd - is that you? Help us, please ... please help us,' A voice echoed in the room." (Part 5)


• Untitled Random Story #3 (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: MY EYES THEY BURN!!), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Into the fire she swallowed their hate."


• Victor Morgendorffer, by Shiva (part 17): "It was dinner time once more in the House of Morgendorffer. 'At least it's not lasagna,' Victor told himself with a small amount of relief as he nibbled at the meatloaf on his plate."


• Where Did Quinn Go?, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, cinna-babe! Aren't you that hot little Quinn chick from the Legion?'"


• Xerxes DeMartino, by Shiva (part 10): "The car ride to Sloane Manor was proving to be a rather tediously annoying experience. At least from Xerxes's perspective."

Junk Is Meant to Be Eaten

Not only is today National Junk Food Day, certainly beloved of Our Heroine Jane and her sidekick Daria, but it is also a double Daria episode anniversary. The last episode of the first season, "The Misery Chick," and the third-season episode "Jake of Hearts" both premiered on this date 13 and 11 years ago, respectively.

Today is Racial Harmony Day in Singapore, and we give them our best. Marshall McLuhan, who studied the development of mass media and coined the term "global village," was born this day 99 years ago.

And now for the news.

No0OZ!

• Daria appeared on the cover of AM New York recently and was there discovered by Chris Tucker, who announced it on PPMB with help from Jim North.
• Check out the Daria motivational posters, courtesy of NoName999. NEW! Even more motivational posters are being posted from assorted contributors! Party on!
  
• The Daria forum on Television Without Pity is now up to 55 pages. Awesome. Join the talk.
• NEW! Nu art: "South Park Daria," by GlitterShrooms; "Daria Is the Word," byDestiny18au.
• NEW! Charles RB brings to PPMB a new thread for fannish infighting: Upchuck: Threat or Menace?
• MUCH NEWER! Wraith's Sick, Sad World website has updated!
• MUCH MUCH NEWER! Kristen Bealer has discovered the ultimate home for bibliophiles like us Daria fans. Oh. My. Gawd....
  

FF.net

• MUCH NEWER! The InDark, by Mediancat (Parts 28 and 29): Mrs. Kruger seethed, but inwardly realized she had no choice. Though she was chafing to get another shot at killing Daria Morgendorffer, she could dematerialize; she was not a teleporter and had to get to Salt Lake City the old fashioned way. Salt Lake City? she'd asked in disbelief, as though no one ever got assassinated in Utah.

PPMB

• NEW! And the Number One Top-Ten Reason to Love the Telephone, by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "The transplant took. She's making new blood cells on her own... No, don't thank me. It's her. She should have died several times... Slowly. Very slowly. She doesn't have a lot to work with right now." [Part of the "Season in Hell" series]
  
• NEW! Bedside Consultation, by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "So, how are you feeling today?" Words do not exist, she wrote. "Yeah, it's rough. But, really, you are doing well. You're losing weight, to be expected, but not as fast as you could be. That's good. It shows you're absorbing nourishment, no matter how fast you're voiding it. No sign of infection at the feeding tube site, I see. Any pain at the site... well, any pain other than the usual?" [Part of the "Season in Hell" series]
• NEW! Daria and Trent Forever, by Malakite (Part 3): Jane herself couldn't quite believe what she was doing, to the extent that she was thinking about it at all. Making eyes at and chatting up her best friend's dad while her best friend was sitting right there, interjecting the occasional snide double entendre, was really not how she had planned to spend her time here.
  
• Daria/Dorian 5: Mountain of Truth, by LadieT (Part 2): Dorian flipped through the book. He choose a heavy jacket, first-aid kit, and a new sleeping bag. He would let Jane use it and if he could fit into his old one. He knew hers was not in good condition, especially if the weather became bad. He gave the catalog to his mom. Helen placed the order for overnight delivery. "Hey, Dad, can I borrow your camping backpack?" Dorian asked as he shut off the television. "Sure thing, kiddo. It's in the garage." Dorian headed for the garage, pulled out the oversized backpack, and went to his room. He leaned it against his desk while he made a short checklist of what he wanted to put in it. Rather be safe than sorry. Who knows what Ms. Li has got planned. A few minutes later, he heard a knock on his door. He opened it. Quinn and Jane came into the room. They looked at the backpack. "See, I told you he went off the deep end," Quinn smirked. (Part 3)
  

• Daria: Hunter 6—Infectious, by Jim North (continued): Jane tried to stand up, but her muscles didn't want to listen to her. She wibbled, she wobbled, but she couldn't get up. Consciousness decided to ditch her for a few seconds, leaving her back on the ground to start all over again. And start all over she did. She had to stand, had to help. "Now that was just STUPID, now WASN'T it, Miss Lane? JUST what I would EXPECT from a sidekick!" That voice, that hated voice! Jane gritted her teeth, pushed herself up with all her might, and punched DeMartino in the leg.
• Finn Morgendorffer 53: Purely Magnetic, by HolyGrail2007 (Parts 5, 6, and 7): “Actually, I was planning a trip down.” Jane informed him. “Daria and I are coming down for a weekend.” “Really? Well, that’s nice. Would be nice to see you again. What weekend?” “Prom weekend.” “Oh!” Finn tried not to sound overjoyed that he would at least have someone to hang out with. “Why’s that?” “No reason.” Jane was as hard to read as always. “You’ve got a reason. Tell me.” “A Jane reason.” Jane replied evasively. (Part 6) (Part 7)
  
• LAST CALL NEWESTER! First Born, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): At the Birthing Center, they found the medic and the ambulance driver in the waiting room. The nurse at the duty station said, "Friends of the Adlers?" "Yes," Daria said. Jane said, "The military escort tipped you off." The nurse chuckled. "That, and Mrs. Adler is the only woman in labor." "Ah," Jane said. "That too." (Last part) (FF.net)
  
• Grove Hell 2: All the Lawndale People, by Charles RB (part 2): Jane was the best artist in school and had a rapport with art teacher Miss Defoe—both of which meant Jane felt compelled to enter the contest. She’d been grouchy until she’d realized her painting could show student life sucked. “Yes,” said Daria. “Got any ideas of what I can do?” “No.” “Come on, you’re the most negative person I know.” “A photo of Kevin and Brittany, and the words ‘America’s Future’.” “That’s too negative.” (FF.net)
• The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (Part 45): Sue smiled, fairly satisfied with Misha's effort and her own finishing touches. "I'm coming back with blood, Misha. With blood!" "Good luck!" Sue marched out of the bathroom. Elsie Sloane, if you're wrong about this, I'm going to make the rest of the year a nightmare for you.
• Judith Strikes! The Best Halloween Ever! by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): The young woman known as Judith barely had time to scream as Daria Morgendorffer’s spring-loaded bed flipped over, around on one side, and smacked her face-first into a padded wall in the blink of an eye! “GAH—!” Judith choked out, as the bed fell away from her. “DA—” The curse was choked away as the bed slammed back into her, driving her back into the wall! “You little bi—” The bed struck again with a room-rattling WHAM! “I’m gonna ki—” WHAM! “You’re gonna pay—” WHAM!
• NEW! Kabti-Ilani-Marduk, by Malakite (Part 5): Daria giggled a little at the face her Dad was making.Then she leapt toward him and wrapped her arms around him. This caused the boat to rock back and forth gently as he told her how wonderful she was and how she was his favorite in that warm soothing voice. It was a paradise on a beautiful lake under a perfect sky. She purred gently as she buried her head in his chest. Then there was a horrible piercing crack of thunder and Daria lept up...
  
• The Lane That Wasn't, by LadieT (Part 2): We were on our way back to the school to destroy our poster. I remember heading out the front door saying, "I call shotgun." Daria turned to me, "Fine, but I claim it for the trip back." Trent was leaning against the front of the car. He had a small grin on his face. "I see Janey beat you again at shotgun, Dee." Jane's brow creased. I don't ever recall Trent having a pet name for Daria. Jane began to think about the conversation they had in the car. Daria was never this talkative around Trent. Even as we were getting out of the car, after I warned him to go park, Daria playfully slapped his arm and made a 'you better stay awake' gesture. He nodded and let out a slight laugh. Another look of confusion fell over Jane's face. I don't get it. Daria would never touch Trent much less slap him. I need answers and the two people I feel will give me straight answers can't. One is not here and the other is unconscious. Jane let out a long, frustrated sigh.
• MOST NEWESTER! My Heart Is Going Boom Boom Boom! by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "Jake! How're you doing? The flight was OK? No trouble getting a cab?" "No, no. Everything went well." "Good. So, we'll be officially discharging Daria in about 30 minutes. Paperwork, you know. So. She's in remission. She's not cured. We never use that word with cancer. But the prognosis is damned good." Mac watched Jake carefully. This is usually when they lose it. Hang in there, Jake, she needs father to be strong for her right now! [Part of the "Season in Hell" series]
• NEW! Pizza Run, by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "You know, when that favor is called in, it's going to be a whopper!" "Probably involving shovels, the dead of night and a convincing alibi about the sudden disappearance of Sandi." (MUCH MUCH NEWER! Part 2) [Part of the "Season in Hell" series]
  

• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (Part 18): "And while we're on the subject, what about the way you'd always be busting on Tom?" "What the hell're you talking about?" "It's a bone I've been meaning to pick, Daria. I thought you gave him so much shit about his money and his parents' connections while you two were dating. Okay, granted me and Tom were having problems before we stopped seeing each other, but I never had a problem with his money. I think if anyone had a right to feel resentful, it would have been me. He was even kind enough to get his folks to write a letter to Bromwell to try to get you off the waiting list. I didn't say it at the time, but I thought you were being an ass, being all resentful like that. He wasn't doing that because he was showing off or doing it as an act of charity. He did it because he loved you and he wanted you to be with him. Is that so freaking hard to understand?"
• Three-Edged Sword, by NightGoblyn (Parts 5 and 6): Tom glanced up, relief flickering across his face before fading back to worry. "Thanks for not locking the door," Daria said dryly, glancing around the living room. "Where's Jane?" "In her room," Tom said. "Probably still crying." "Oh." Daria stood quietly for a moment, fidgeting and watching Tom as he stared silently into the playpen. "What are you doing?" "I decided to spend some time with the only women in this house that don't hate me," he answered quietly. (Part 6)
• Who's the Bitch Now? by Chris Tucker (Parts 1 and 2 and 3): Seven months before graduation, the Season of Hell began very simply: "Where the hell did THAT come from?" she thought, as she was taking her morning shower. Yes, it was a lump in her breast. Yes, the biopsy indicated cancer, and malignant. And NOT the usual type of breast cancer. The next day, the doctor gave the family the bad news. All Daria could recall were the words "Cancer," "VERY aggressive," "Begin treatments NOW!" and "Chicago hospital." (Part 2) (LAST CALL NEWESTER! Part 3) [Part of the "Season in Hell" series]
• Unnamed story, by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): The two women watched the amazing images on the TV. "You know, we can say we knew her 20 years ago, when she was just another high school student."