Why Does Upchuck Look So Natural as a Piñata?

Once again it's Cinco de Mayo, which does not mean "Put the mayonnaise in the sink." The Fifth of May is good for doing all kinds of things that involve eating Mexican food, which is my favorite sort of food. If you are of the drinking persuasion, you may do so. Just be careful. Party hard and remember your history. (Thanks to Pinhead for the image.)

Oh, and Karl Marx is 192 years old today. Jake would remember him, if no one else does. (He got a copy of Das Kapital from Helen in that wedding anniversary flashback in "Sappy Anniversary.")

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• NEW! Daria: Battle and Glory, by OverlordMikey (Contest Version): Ms. Li nodded. "Yes the students," she said, unconcerned. "Who did you have in mind?" "No one in particular," said Mike. "Students will get their parents' permission and two will be chosen." He paused for a moment. Li was obviously thinking about the cash and didn't question him about her students' safety, although she may have just assumed it was taken care of. After all, any lawsuits would be directed at them, not her. Still, his bosses would kill him if he didn't give the entire speech. "Our fighters are trained to fight safely in these situations. You have no fear." Ms. Li was already looking over the contract with a pen in hand. By the time he finished speaking she was signing. They shook hands and the deal with the devil was complete, although Mike wasn't entirely sure which of them was the devil in this situation. [See also here.]
  
• Finn Morgendorffer 45: Quarter Past Midnight, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 2): “Finn, I’m sure some brotherly advice would be very helpful.” Helen added. “Let’s see...never drink from a cup that’s been sitting. Always put your hand over your cup when you’re not drinking it. Never accept a drink from anyone, girl or guy, unless...” “Finn!” “What? I’m just giving her the advice you didn’t mention. Come on, didn’t you go to parties in college.” Finn protested. “And hey, that was back in the 70's. Didn’t everyone at college parties back then do all sorts...” “You don’t need to finish that sentence!” Helen returned sharply.
• Parents Are People, by Legendeld (Part 4): "Because of our parents," said Amy, "your mother doesn't believe that a man who doesn't hit a woman or drive drunk, has a drinking problem. As long as Jake didn't cross those lines, she couldn't see it as a problem." "So Mom let him drink because she though it was ok." Quinn was slightly confused. "So why is that a problem?"
• NEW! Shining Star: Temporal Conundrum, by RLobinske (Part 9): Archangel stiffened and said, "Uh-oh." Daria said, "I don't like the sound of that." "I just sensed a dimensional disturbance. And close." Richard said, "Daria, is there a Good Time Chinese restaurant in town?" "No, why?" "That would've made things a lot easier," Archangel said. "But I can manage."
  

An Octomom, She Isn't

Nine years ago today, TV Guide published an "interview" with Daria Morgendorffer that covered the then-upcoming movie Is It Fall Yet? and her life in general. One question she was asked, and her response, are worth noting.

• Q: Do your career goals include working with children?
• A: Well, I don't plan to pursue "trapped in a living hell" as a career, so no.

Daria has expressed feelings like this before, and it is interesting that her parents have even come close to saying the same for themselves, in responding to a long-ago question from a viewer.

Given her parents' comments, it seems likely Daria will eventually (reluctantly?) have one or two kids. Or she might not, and just opt for favorite aunt status with Quinn's kids. It is interesting that in "Lane Miserables," she imagined a future in which she and Trent had one child. This was about a year of Dariaverse time after she imagined herself childless and married in "Write Where It Hurts."

Also on this day, just three years ago, astronomers finally figured out what a planet is, but then they forgot to include Pluto. Dwarf planet, indeed [shakes fist at sky]. SOCIALISM IS TO BLAME! However, there is a movement afoot to fix this horrible injustice.

One hundred and ten years ago was born a man with a passion for books and writing (no doubt a role model for Daria). Jorge Luis Borges is acclaimed for his fantastic works, and something of him has even crossed over into Daria fanfiction. Scissors MacGillicutty's unfinished "In Dreams" has Daria and Jane discover Borges' Library of Babel in the Morgendorffer family's attic. (You may read what Borges said about the Library here.)

Enjoy the day. Oh, and if you are looking for a new Iron Chef, Lorenzo Sauchelli presents: Daria's Little Helper.

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• John Lane 42: Legally Halloween, by Richard Lobinske (Part 1): "Okay, you win. We'll go to Brittany's party. But to warn you, there's as much chance of me wearing an Emma Peel catsuit as there is of you wearing one."
• The Runaway, by Aloysius (Part 1): Pete shook his head and smiled as he watched the boys move off. Therefore, he didn’t see a pajama-clad brunette climb into the back of his trailer and hide amongst the boxes.
• Scarlett the Fairy, by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): This is a story about Scarlett the Fairy, and her quest to get her favorite food by far: muffins. Scarlett, you see, is a fourteen-inch tall fairy, with straight red hair that extends to her shoulders in somewhat helmet-shaped haircut. The hair, many times, covers at least one of her eyes and she’s been known to give people and other fairies (as well as other imaginary creatures) a cryptic smile.
• Wristcutters: A Daria Story, by Charliefox2012 (Parts 1 to 3): The awesome fanfic from FF.net makes its way to PPMB. Read and enjoy.