Roses are Red, Your Soul is Dead....

Good news! Andrea is going to regale us with a few rhymes about rotting flesh in honor of World Poetry Day. This is good news because the alternative was to listen to Quinn's latest masterpiece about greasy fries.

If you're in the mood to laugh instead, you could always take Jane's advice and watch poetry being read by puppets to celebrate World Puppetry Day. Just imagine, gorgeous sonnets being recited by puppets flailing their skinny little puppet arms!

Daria might be interested to know that today is National Teenager Day, so there's an entire holiday just for her and her fellow teens. However, the holiday doesn't include getting the day off school, so I doubt she'll be very impressed by it.

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Morgendorffer vs Velma Dinkley, by kllngjk2 (COMPLETE!): "Lawndale, Maryland. Daria Morgendorffer just returned home from a Alice Cooper concert; she went there with Jane Lane, her close friend."


• Death of a Muscle Car, by wilddogjj (parts 1 and 2): "Quinn, Jim, their son Timmy and his girlfriend Q were gathered in the driveway. Jim was less than thrilled." (Part 2)


• Quinn-tessential, by riotsquirrrl (COMPLETE!): "Oh God, how embarrassing. She realized that she had fallen for her sister's boyfriend. Quinn trudged up the stairs to go to her room."


• Spider Quinn 15 The New Challenges, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "Jamie looked around as Mr. Elders gave a tour of the Solarium. 'It looks more like a lair than a solarium.'"

Better or Worse than a Vogon? You Make the Call!

Happy World Poetry Day! In celebration, let's all take a moment to enjoy a dramatic reading by Jeffy:

The greasy fry,
It cannot lie;
Its truth is written
On your thighs.

Brings a tear to your eye, doesn't it?

Fanfic Update!

• The Amazing Adventures of Captain Invincible!, by Erin M. (part 5): "'It's not just that she read the stories, is it?' she asked. 'Spike, what's really bothering you?' The dragon took a deep breath and let it out with a sigh. 'It was supposed to be a surprise.'"


• Daria and Co. (Are Forced To) Read 'My Immortal' (Iron Chef; You're Standing on My Immortal Now with video), by Shiva (part 7): "Then as Jane turned to her friend to offer sympathy, but no pills, a chime echoed through the room and a small table appeared in front of the computer. On it were several bags full of pot, some pre-rolled joints, a bong, a bunch of pipes, and lighters."


• Daria and Jane: On Michelle Shocked (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Jane: 'Say Daria, what do you call a female alternative folk singer who once dated a woman and a mere decade later launched a 'God hates fags' rant that Fred Phelps faps too?'"


• Daria/Dr. Who: A Cynical Earth, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "'Oh, my,' Kate said. 'That means that any one of us could have our minds controlled.' 'Or all,' Daria said. The Doctor said, 'Ace, please tell me that you're still carrying around Nitro-9.'"


• Darius Taylor (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Shiva (part 1): "'Well we did it Brit,' Darius said while holding up a can of Ultra Cola in a mock toast, 'We survived our first year at Fielding.'"


• Full Frontal (Not in That Way) (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'Well, you see,' replied Doug, 'me and Charlene have been trying to give Kevin here a start by getting him a squeeze. Thing is, though, most of them...aren't exactly his type. You think you got any for him?"


• Gag Name Reflex (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'Will the following people please come down to the principal's office?'"


• Gay Pride, Weak (Scenes No Daria Fanfic should have: Delightful and Naughty), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "That's when I woke up, diary. I know that Sandi's not that way - if anything, Stacy is, or she's just so damned horny that she's ready to go with anything that she feels reasonably safe with, and I can see that, more than anything else."


• The Great Genderswap of Lawndale!, by Shiva (parts 3 and 4): "In the Landon's not-quite-a-mansion-but-close home, Joey Landon was sitting with his new kid brother Raphael and their little sister Evelyn as their New Dad, Michael Landon talked on the phone to their, well..." (Part 4)


• Losers No More, by Shiva (part 13): "Since it was Friday, the Snarky Foursome's time had already been consumed by the need to help put the gym together for the dance in advance for Saturday."


• Love is Strange, by Shiva (part 2): "As her new manager at It's a Nutty, Nutty World! continued ranting about the glories of his Nutty Empire, or whatever, Daria found that not even snark was saving her from the horror. The horror..."


• LSD, by PrecambrianStudios (part 1): "'Now girls, I just wanted you both to know that your mother and I are really proud of you both for being so patient in Highland. We know it was frustrating for you both, but hey, things might be looking up!'"


• Mack the Esteemer, by Shiva (part 18): "'...And then Ms. Li came onto the announcements saying that we all have to volunteer our time to get some coffee shack going, otherwise we'll all be suspended.' Just as Daria began to get very irritated with her sister for not knowing when to shut up, Helen gasped. 'What?!'"


• My Sister and Me, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Jodie scowled at her leader. 'I never treat my sister that way.' 'Trust me - you're missing out. Besides, it's memories for later that you can laugh about. When was the last time you and your sister actually did anything together - embarrassing or otherwise?'"


• Operation Glitterberries: Interlude II, by BF110C4 (part 1): "'Jane, I'm Captain Burns of the Lawndale Police Department Major Crimes Unit and I need to talk with you about Daria.' All that was gone from my mind when the man came in and said those words."


• Playing With a (Daria-Specific) Trope (Scenes No Daria Fanfic should have: Delightful and Naughty), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "Daria wasn't sure what to make of the situation. She'd never been much for the dating scene, or the popular one. And it perturbed her a little just how easily her best friend could fit into both."


• Rude Awakening Ep 13: The Hiring Game, by DIsaac (parts 2 and 3): "DARIA: Wait, WMOT? ... Isn't that the chick that said all that crap about immigrants? JODIE: Is that the same one that called her listeners the dumbest listeners to ever walk the earth? And that one of her grandparents allegedly has connections to Mussolini? JANE: Yep, this one is strictly for snark purposes only." (Part 3)


• Timmy, by PrecambrianStudios (part 1): "'You familiar with a little boy with brown hair, looks about kindergarten age?' 'Oh.' Her voice had taken on a solemn tone. 'Tim O'Neil?' 'I guess. Kids looks miserable. Did something happen with him?'"


• We Only Hurt the Ones We Love, by deneich (part 15): "'Jane when we spoke after school on Friday, was there something that you neglected to tell me?' A vacant stare was Jane's only reply, so I continued with, 'concerning Quinn, perchance?'"


• Where Did Quinn Go?, by Brother Grimace (part 1): "The ongoing mystery we are faced with is the disappearance of Quinn A. Morgenddorffer. There is a slight disruption – a 'skip' in the record-keeping ability, if you will, of the (REDACTED FOR SECURITY PURPOSES) within the (REDACTED FOR SECURITY PURPOSES)."

"Yeah, I just found out that poems don't even have to rhyme. How easy is that?"

Happy World Poetry Day to you all! Andrea is reading us one of her lighthearted classics, so let's sit back and enjoy!

I'm here.
But where are you?
Sure, I see your body.
Anybody home in that rotting bag of flesh?

Ahhh, poetry.

Fandom News!

• Share your thoughts and good wishes for Townsville in Queensland, which was recently hit by major storms.


• Deref will be heading off to Viet Nam soon. Send him your best wishes (and demands for pictures)!


• oni wants to know if anyone else is interested in noir films.


• Two new Iron Chefs have been posted in the Creative Writing forum: jtranser's Getting Ready for the End of the World and Walter Kovacs's Removing the 3 Js.

"I think I feel a poem coming on. (burps) Sorry, false alarm."

It's World Poetry Day! Quinn would like to share the following poem, as read by Jeffy:

The greasy fry,
It cannot lie;
Its truth is written
On your thighs.

Let's all just take a moment to let the brilliance sink in, shall we?

Okay, enough of that. Now for the latest fandom news!

• The Recipe Exchange Thread has been revived! Share your favorites there.


• tafka is looking for any fellow pole students to share with.


• Discussion is underway about Green Lantern: The Animated Series and other comic book-related subjects.


• Have you seen the Dr. Who Comic Relief Special? Share your thoughts in the thread!


• A new game in the Weapons of Mass Distraction forum: guess the cartoon character.


• CR85747 started a thread to talk about My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.


• Filming has started on the movie The Hobbit. Any thoughts?

A Good Day with an Awkward Name

Another day with a lot going on. Let's see, it is the UN-mandated International Day for the Elimination of Racial Discrimination (a worthy goal but such a horrible title), and also Humans Rights Day in South Africa and Harmony Day in Australia. The latter two get special awards for being succinct and on target. We should talk to the UN about the too-long-a-name issue. They have a lot of awkwardly named holidays and really need to work on that.

It is the 58th anniversary of the Moondog Coronation Ball, which was the very first rock & roll concert ever. (The guys of Mystik Spiral fill in as mascots here.) The MCB was held in Cleveland and was kind of a successful failure, as you will see when you read the link.

Finally, with the able assistance of Andrea (below), we celebrate World Poetry Day. Write a Daria poem and post it on PPMB or FF.net today. Stretch your boundaries. Blow some minds. Make some rhymes. There you go!

NEWZ!!

• Work continues on the magnificent Best of Daria Fan Fiction on FF.net! Go go go!
• NEW! Gene wishes to know what great description (best descriptive phrase) you have read lately that impressed you.
  

PPMB

• Finn Morgendorffer 38: Fractures, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 2): “Aunt Rita?” Finn’s voice called from the couch. “What are...” Helen started, but Rita interrupted. “Oh, Helen, it’s awful. Ralph left me!” Rita exclaimed. “He... what? Oh, that bastard!” Finn shouted.

• From the Fractured Life of Stacy Rowe, by Respite (COMPLETE!): But then, just like every other bastard, he doesn't call, and it's five o'clock somewhere, and I'm halfway through my soaps and a bottle of Smirnoff when his bitch comes pounding on my door yelling my name like I'm going to come out if she keeps yelling. And so I had to do something, or my neighbors were going to hate me even more than they probably did already.
• NEW! Gimme the Prize, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): Anthony DeMartino warily entered the alley behind the Good Time Chinese restaurant. He could feel the other immortal waiting. The electric feeling was unmistakable and the accumulated power, intoxicating. There can be only one...
  
• Mata Dari, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): It was the irony of the thing that Daria hated the most. The most accomplished wordsmith Lawndale High had seen in at least a decade was, less than a year short of her thirtieth birthday, working as an accountant.
• Morning Next, by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "Okay, so, everything makes sense then," Jane said with a nod. Daria glared at her. "No, everything does not make sense!" she said. "Where did we get the sushi? And the gum? And this hotel room? And the penguin?!" (FF.net)
  
• Project Runaway, by Disco316 (COMPLETE!): Stacy Rowe had run away from her home over the weekend for reasons nobody could determine. Her parents said they couldn’t find any sign of why she had left, and nobody had seen her since Saturday night. At school, Quinn had suggested to her other friends, Sandi Griffin and Tiffany Blum-Deckler, that they should go out searching for her after school. Sandi’s response was to suggest that the Fashion Club should not lower itself to searching in unfashionable areas. The ensuing argument left both Sandi and Quinn upset, and left Tiffany primping at a mirror; at least, that’s the last either had seen of her before leaving.
• Unnamed story (March Madness Round 1, Match 1: Minx vs Jim North), by Minx (COMPLETE!): “I did it. I told you. Eleven a.m. on move-in day. Those crayons were useful.” Jane said. Daria could hear the smile in her voice. Daria’s brow furrowed, ‘Eleven a.m. on move in day? What the hell was she on about…?’ As Daria thought, a snippet of a long forgotten conversation slipped into her mind. “Wait a minute, you’re not referring to… I mean you didn’t… Crayons?” Daria said in disbelief.
• A Very Special Daria, by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): Jane’s eyes began to twitch. Something was way off. A dream? No, that can’t be right. Brain-washing? Then how could Brittany have been affected? The Twilight Zone? No, there’s color. I must have died! Was I really bad enough to be sent to hell though? Hmmmmm—don’t answer that.