"It's only a matter of time."

Happy Make Your Dream Come True Day! Daria would like her whole family to do something together. Something that'll really make them suffer. I suppose dinners at Pizza Forest and hours at UFO conventions are a pretty darn good start to that dream.

Any ideas on what Daria's actual goals in life might include? Becoming a writer is a popular one, and her future story from "Write Where It Hurts" gave us some touching insights into what she wants her family to be like, but what else might Daria wish for? Aside from pizza, that is.

In the meantime, here's the latest fanfic update:

• The Best Laid Plans (Iron Chef: The Big Three-Zero), by Yogi (COMPLETE!): "'Well, I turned 30 today and what do I get for my birthday? ANOTHER bunch of CIA assassins that I had to dispose of. Yay me. Not that this was unexpected, since the doomsday weapon is only weeks away from completion. I really hope they don’t call my bluff since I want to RULE the world, and after that thing goes off there wouldn’t be much left to rule. I think I can angle it so that at least half of Hawaii remains untouched so in the worst case scenario I at least get to retire in a nice place....'"


• Between The Boards (Write-off Challenge 7, Round 3), by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "'My name is Quinn Morgendorffer. Does this school have a hockey team? I played on the jay-vee team in Lawndale despite being in eighth grade.' 'Yes we do - but nobody goes to their games because they never win.' The black-haired boy replied. 'That's because I haven't joined the team yet.'"


• By any Means Necessary (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by Yogi (COMPLETE!): "It had only been two days, and Jodie was already close to snapping. She had barely bit back several profane comments towards the congressman she was volunteering for, had almost slapped her sister for taking the fresh pancake at breakfast where there was already one on the table, and had made a rather undiplomatic comment about the quality of a yearbook page." (Extra scene by NightGoblyn here)


• Daria/Dorian 12: Spring Breaks, by LadieT (part 3): "Drinking milk straight from the carton, Jake took his own sweet time driving causing Helen to become enraged. With about an hour left to go, Helen forced her husband to pull over so she could drive the rest of the way. In the backseat, Dorian and Quinn looked at each other and shook their heads. They knew they were going to be in for a long weekend."


• Free (Iron Chief: Daria cries...), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane stood down the block, faces painted vivid orange from the light of the blaze. Gas cans and rags sat in the decaying back seat of Trent's car, and though the remains of the wine bottles that crashed through nearly every window on the ground floor of the main building would eventually be found, there would be no fingerprints to incriminate them."


• Fugitive Chapter 2: The Blues, by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "Before, she had thought of him as a killer robot -- a rather cute and nice killer robot, but a robot nonetheless. But in that instant he wasn't like that anymore, not in her eyes. She saw something different, something completely different. This sad, lonely guy, sitting in a rusted car on a junk yard, this was neither a killer nor a robot. He was a survivor. A fugitive. A guy fucked over by destiny." (Part 2)


• Ghost Girl: Chapter One, by Pumpkin Panic (COMPLETE!): "You see, Daria was no ordinary jaded sarcastic teenager. She had a gift... or more accurately to how she felt about it a curse. She could see, talk to, and even touch ghosts. So in a place such as historical Lawndale she might be a bit uncomfortable." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8)


• Ghost Girl Chapter 2, by Pumpkin Panic (parts 1 - 6): "Jane was the second ghost she hadn't sent off to the great beyond. She didn't seem to want to go. She was content where she was. She didn't annoy Daria or haunt anyone and Daria reasoned that's why she hadn't done it yet. The truth was though it was because this was the first person that she had really connected with ever and Daria didn't want to lose her best friend over some silly technicality like she was dead." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)


• God Save The Esteem ep17: Bits and Pierces, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'You... you haven't been to a funeral, have you?' pleaded Helen. Willow laughed. 'Oh no, no, we just had to come straight from work.' '...work.' 'InterVestMint Bank up in Baltimore,' said Dingo. '...bank.'" (Part 3)


• I Don't Side Stories: Luhrman, by OverlordMikey (part 1): "He sighed and opened his desk. Inside was a tiny box, like the kind one would keep a ring in. Inside a small diamond he had planned to give Erin. 'I wouldn't want to miss the wedding of the century.' I can only hope something catches fire, like the groom."


• Jane Morgendorffer, by LadieT (part 33): "As the rest of the Morgendorffers approached, Jake saught sight of Rita and had the urge to run to the airport bar. Helen grabbed his hand and led him towards the bench her two siblings were sitting at. Rita and Helen gave each other a short hug. Rita looked at her at her newest niece and only nephew. She studied Daria then moved to Trent, but her eyes kept going back to Daria. Making a face of some digust, Rita backed away from the Lane siblings."


• John Lane 48: A Boston We Will Go, by RLobinske (part 3): "'I don't think I'll need to worry too much about the fraternity and sorority houses, but they're on the other side of the matching dorms, following a nice, early twentieth century sensibility of not allowing boys and girls to live too close together.' 'And it gives more opportunities for streaking across the quad,' Amy said. When John and Daria looked at her, she said, 'Hey, I started college in the seventies. We did things like that. And before you give me any more looks, your generation will find something just as stupid to do.'"


• Lawndale Rumble, by TheExcellentS (parts 6 - 10): "O'NEILL: 'Thompson is unloading with those trademark shoulder tackles on Ruttheimer!' BARCH: 'You know, it's taking every fibre of my being to stop myself from getting up and giving both of them the business.' O'NEILL: 'I've seen you give the business. I don't think my scars have fully healed yet.'" (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10)


• Life Beyond Highland (Iron Chef: Lawndale State), by LadieT (part 10): "Seeing the redhead, Stacy signaled for Quinn to join her and her friends. In her mind, Quinn began to try to feel out the two people standing with Stacy. The taller Asian woman seemed very uninterested and focused more on her nails than on Quinn. The brunette on the other hand, stared intently at Quinn and scowled. Great, she sees me as competition. This isn't high school anymore bitch, get over yourself." (Part 11)


• Lingering Hours, by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "As the melancholy notes sang through the still air of that Wednesday night, Daria thought of a boy with dark hair and a gap-toothed smile, eyes which seemed to shine liquid green under the summer sun. She thought of long games of tag, scavenger hunts, trading books on rainy afternoons. A smile touched her heart at the memory of the fourth grade talent show, the vision of him in that single spotlight, playing his favorite song."


• Mise-en-Sandi, by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'I got permission to use Pepperhill High School for a $10,000 fee. I can shoot there whenever I want to. I have the run of the place and the limited assistance of the faculty.' Jack stood back, framing an imaginary scene. 'We're at high school. We have the jocks, the brains, the nerds, the mean girls.' 'Did you know that Sandi was in one of those girl cliques?' Roy said, trying to derail Jack's moment of triumph. 'She was in something called the Fashion Club.' 'No shit?' Jack said. 'Roy, why are you holding back? I knew that Sandi was fashionable but didn't know anything about a "Fashion Club"?'"


• My years with Daria, by CR85747 (COMPLETE!): "Whatever the case, the day-- sometime in February, I think-- when I found out during a particularly unnotable rerun of B&B that Daria – that's her name!-- was leaving Highland (apparently after particularly a profound session of plastic surgery) to star in her own show seemed to make sense to me."


• Oh, By The Way, by RLobinske (part 1): "Daria smiled at her father and then asked her mother, 'What about Quinn?' 'Their flight was delayed and they'll call when they land. Quinn said something about having an announcement to make. Do you have any idea of what she's talking about?' Helen said. Daria shook her head. 'Not a clue, Mom.'"


• Quinn's Code - Story 1: The Esteemsters Code, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "'I mean that new girl has, like, turned everything upside down. She is popular despite her being a geek! We need to, like, put her in her place, before previously unpopular people become popular as a result of her example,' Sandi said. 'Ok,' Stacy said, not sure what Sandi had in mind. She watched Sandi eat up her food at a high speed. When she had finished eating Sandi got up. 'Come on, We're going to put that geek in her place.'"


• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (part 39): "At the moment, however, she had her friend Stacy over to spend the night. She was kneeling at the other end of the bed, holding a mirror to her face and trying different varieties of lip gloss. It was Halloween night, but neither of them had dates. The funny thing was, neither of them cared. They were content to hang out together."


• Running High, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Quinn was only dimly aware of pain in her bare feet as they slapped against the gravel-strewn sidewalk, focused as she was on following Jake's car. It was pulling away from the house, but as it slowed to turn down another street something in Quinn clicked and she forced her legs to move a little more...a little closer...a little faster...and she made it."


• Spirit of the Game, Nature of the Beast, by HolyGrail2007 (parts 7 and 8): "'Oh, that's wonderful dear. It's so nice that she's making friends her first time in this country.' His mother was all smiles as the food was brought out. 'She seems a very nice girl.' Tom neglected to mention where the two of them went on their night out. 'A night out' to Kay Sloane meant dressing up, the opera, and such. While Tom never discounted the importance of culture in a society, such things were not for him. 'I'm sure a night of pizza and bowling was worth the fun.' But leave it to Elsie to rain on someone else's parade." (Part 8)


• Super Daria Bros. (Iron Chef: Super Daria Sisters), by project pegasus (COMPLETE!): "DeMartino: AAARGH! You call THAT shooting a fire flower?! I was in Vietnam! My piss burned more after visiting the red light district of Saigon! Kevin: Oh yeah? (Kevin get right up into Mr. DeMartino's face with his fire flower). This will teach you to make inappropriate jokes about aggressive Western imperialism. (Kevin unleashes his fire flower full blast)"


• Unnamed story, by Kael Seoras: "All those people...they're cheering so loud...she's...popular? Gay and popular? And look at her smiling, glowing with happiness! Maybe if I would come out, I could still be popular...and happy..."


• Unnamed story (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "'FOR LAWNDALE!!!' With an epic warcry Kevin Thompson, Champion of said town, charged forward, axe held high above his head and his scale mail darkened by the massive amounts of gore and blood that had splattered onto it."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Quinn's Pat-a-Cake), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Well?!' bellowed Grand Lord Sponge, glaring down from the throne in his flagship. 'What is the status of Agent Chocolor? I want to know if this blue world is something to capture for the empire!'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Quinn's Pat-a-Cake), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'WHO DARES SUMMON M- oh hey, Quinn. What's up?' 'Hi, Annidax the Dark Unholy! Sorry to bug you or whatever, but I'm really really needing, like, something to get Kevin Thompson to pay attention to me, right?'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Quinn's Pat-a-Cake), by Jim North: "Quinn was thinking hard as she walked. Very hard. As hard as she could think. How was she going to get Kevin Thompson to notice her?" (Continued by Pumpkin Panic)


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Quinn's Pat-a-Cake), by Pumpkin Panic (COMPLETE!): "'I Really like chocolate cake, Johnny.' Quinn purred into the phone. 'It's Jamie. I meant thats awesome. I love chocolate.' This was a lie. He was really allergic to chocolate but Jamie was already looking theough the cabinet for cake mix but couldn't find any. 'It's my favorite.' Quinn continued. 'I wish I could have some.' 'I'll have one ready in an hour!' Jamie said pulling out the ingredients to make a cake by scratch."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Quinn's Pat-a-Cake), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "For over a year that small cake sat in the pack of the fridge, hidden in its little box completely unnoticed. Then one day Jake while rummaging through the fridge came upon the package."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Big Three-Zero), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "'I swear this is the last damn time I'm doing this' a five month pregnant Daria grumbled as she waddled into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of orange juice. Her husband came up behind her and gave her a warm hug cradling her body against his. 'You said that last time' he smiled kissing her neck, 'and the time before that'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chief: Daria cries...), by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "'I still don't know how Quinn won that year-long vacation. She claimed she never entered that contest.' Helen says as she wraps her arms around Jake. 'I'm sure she must have forgotten that she did it. Besides, she'll have a great time in Antartica watching the breeding habits of penguins.' Jake responds with a smile on his face."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by VPrad (COMPLETE!): "The woman turned around to face the figure lying beside her. She brushed away a lock of her beautiful auburn hair that was covering her face. She looked peaceful while she was sleeping. Her lover couldn’t stop thinking how beautiful she was, even when she didn’t intend to. Her big round glasses were lying in the nightstand. The artist loved how they looked on her, even though her significant other wasn’t so convinced about that. She would to say that she was talking more as a girlfriend than as an artist."


• Unnamed story (Whatever happened to Tommy Sherman), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "Tommy Sherman: I'm not dead! Morty the Mortician: Here -- he says he's not dead! Principal Li: Yes, he is."


• Worldburner: The Fixer's Finest Hour, by Charles RB (parts 2 - 4): "He'd been browsing the media and again found no signs of Judith, though he was now curious to know whether President Bradley was a commie destroying the economy & weak on terrorism or a great figure sorting out Afghanistan & fighting poverty. Oh well, next- The sky caught fire. No... something in the sky was on fire. Lots of somethings. 'Ah, that'd be the lovely Judith then...'" (Part 3)(Part 4)


• Worldburner: They Were Nine, by Erin M. (part 1): "It had been three months since Judith and her army from hell had come to Lawndale, burning everything in sight and killing anyone they found. Once the police and sheriff's departments had been wiped out, the survivors had gone to the one truly secure place in the town. Lawndale High. For once, all the security precautions Angela had installed in the school were actually useful. The school, plus the surprising contents of Mr. DeMartino's gun collection, enabled the survivors to hold out for almost a week."


• Worldburner: This is My BOOMSTICK!, by Brother Grimace (part 1): "'Ladies and gentlemen - this is the Armalite PFT-JK-11 concussive-force energy weapon - our own personal design,' the man said, holding up a rifle-style weapon with a non-reflective, black-matte finish that screamed "military issue" to those present in uniform. 'She’s designed for one thing – to kill every unholy bastard that’s fool enough to put itself in your sights.'"