I Hope She Won't Be on Top of the Pyramid!

Kevin had better get appreciating for Appreciate a Dragon Day, or at the very least stop hitting on Angie for the love of God! Do you have a death wish, man?

If dragons aren't your thing, how about gorillas? Today is the anniversary of Dian Fossey's birth in 1932, and without Fossey there would be no Lawndale High School Dian Fossey Award for Dazzling Academic Achievement in the Face of Near-Total Misanthropy. And does anyone else besides me really want to find out the story behind that award?

Fanfic Update!

• Cuckoos On Infinite Earths, by Smijey (part 28): "'I still can't believe you invited me to dinner with your family,' Daria said. 'Well, it is Christmastime,' Janice -- or Ms. J, as she was publicly known -- dismissed."


• David M., by ST91 (part 7): "Saturday morning was the time of the week that David loved most. The start of 48 hours without school or gym; only time dedicated to himself."


• IncorporaTed (The Ted Zone), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Mr. DeMartino stood in front of the classroom, holding a stack of papers. 'Here are the results of your career aptitude tests,' he was saying. 'If any of you have the misfortune of getting "teacher" for a result, be advised that, per Ms. Li, suicide attempts are not permissible on school grounds.'"


• Iron Chef: Truth or Dare, by Charles RB (part 9): "'Dare,' he said. Sandi had been really, really fixed on asking him 'truth' and seeing what she could shake loose. 'Fine. I dare you to... er... Okay, you have to sing a showtune.'"


• Moments of Transition, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Here, take this. You look like you could use it.' Jaime looked up from the high-backed, solid wood bench he sat upon to see a young, college-age woman stand in front of him, a paper coffee cup in hand."


• The New Courtier (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "She should never had sought out the book."


• No time for Q&A session (World's Shortest Crossover XV: A New Era In Crossovers), by Walter Kovacs (COMPLETE!): "It's easy to lose track of say two teenage girls in the middle of a mutiny while all kinds of chaos both on earth, as well as on board the United Earth ship Aratrum is going on. This fact is why Daria and Jane were able to wander the corridors of the ship without anyone asking questions."


• Thank U, by Lady Evil (part 31): "Jake parked the car in front of the house, he and Helen not wanting to go in for a while."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by TheBrodsterBoy (COMPLETE!): "'Hey Daria, you here?' Jane had become very concerned about Daria's recent disappearance. She hadn't showed up for pizza."


• When Mom's Away (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Daria is speaking with her oncologist regarding her cancer. Quinn is there to provide support. The doctor, a gray haired man in his fifties, said 'So, after you recover from the hysterectomy we start you on chemo. Any questions?'" (Part 2) (Part 3)

Gimme a D! Gimme an R!

Be sure to show the proper respect to Brittany today for Appreciate a Dragon Day! Kevin failed to do so, and you don't want to know what happened to him.

This is also the anniversary of Dian Fossey's birth in 1932, so today would be an excellent day to either win or hand out an award for dazzling academic achievement in the face of near-total misanthropy.

Fanfic Update!

• Another Day, by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "Quinn's alarm started blaring the local top twenty station, gradually pulling her from her sleep. Yawning, she reached over to her nightstand, turned off the radio, and grabbed the book she'd left there the night before."


• Invader Quinn Season Two, by Anguirus1955 (parts 3 and 4): "'I'm sorry, girls, but I have to work on thanksgiving, and Jake has to go to that conference in Connecticut,' Helen Morgendorffer said to her daughters at the kitchen table. 'But... you guys didn't spend Thanksgiving with us last year either, or the year before that, or the year before that,' Stacey said with disappointment." (Part 4)


• James the Lesser Presents Vinny Lane, by James the Lesser (part 13): "Is she seriously going on a date with this guy? The thought wouldn't leave Vinny's mind after Daria told him she would be, hanging out, with Ted DeWint-Clinton."


• The Kelsington Conspiracy, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (prologue): "It had been a long day for Corrine Hendricks when she managed to get home at 5:30. While most of her students had been well behaved, there were a couple in year 8 who seemed determined to make it as difficult as possible for her to teach them."


• Maternal, by Indigo (part 3): "'Settle down people' Laura Dominguez advised her new class. She was more adept at commanding a classroom than her predecessor and soon had everyone's attention."


• Perception, by Princess_Pasta (part 4): "The ride to Daria's house was uneventful. Kevin was preoccupied by the events of the afternoon, having dealt with his fair share of headaches that day."


• Stacy Morgendorffer, by Rémi (part 1): "'Can I have a word with you, sweetie?' 'Mooooooooooom' whined the redhaired teen, 'can't you see I am busy? Tomorrow is my first day at Lawndale High and I have to chose my outfit carefully! First impressions are important, you know: I must be part of the popular crowd right from the start!'"


• Stones Have a Way, by EntrancedCat (parts 1 and 2): "Daria Morgendorffer braced herself as she heard someone try to get her attention while she walked to seventh-grade science class in Highland East Junior High." (Part 2)


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'...And so it is written within the Tome of the Bro Code: "For if thou art a male of substance and worth, it is for this that thou shall be a target for all that is woman!"'"


• Vivian, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Daria kept her promise. When she returned home she spoke to her mother about Vivian. Now Helen, as always, was overworked but since her daughter rarely asked for something, she decided to accept."

"Gorilla My Dreams..."

Sorry so late and random with the postings. That's how life goes sometimes.

Today is once again the birthday anniversary of gorilla expert Dian Fossey, whose name keeps getting misspelled in Daria fanfiction. Ms. Fossey became important in Daria lore in Is It College Yet? when Daria got a Dian Fossey award (if that's what it was, an award and not an subtle head-smack) from Ms. Li for (all together now): dazzling academic achievement in the face of near-total misanthropy. More about Ms. Fossey and her relationship to the Daria mythos may be learned here.

Two weeks left to mail in your nominations for the Booties. Check PPMB for the latest info.

Can You Repeal the Laws of Gravity?

A mere 367 years ago, Sir Isaac Newton was born, he who figured out why apples hit you on the head, and Daria's Sick, Sad Life Planner chose to commemorate the event (see at right) with an announcement from historian Brittany Taylor about a little-known discovery with which Sir Isaac is rarely credited. You heard it first here.

After reading through Richard Lobinske's listing for 2009 Daria Visual Fanworks, I have picked out my personal favorites and named them on PPMB. Five artists produced so much superior work, it became impossible to pick anything they did. This group of masters includes: Jim North, MDetector5, Minx, Pinhead, and Vlora. I bow to you all and offer my humble thanks. You make this fandom shine.

A bow to Quiverwing, who achieved Cosmic Epic Win by fixing up more DariaWiki pages than anyone else from the last week of December until now. She is engaged in an immense project to classify all Daria fanfiction by year. Other DariaWiki fan-atics worthy of honor include Disco316, Boandpop, Nighthawk, Brother Grimace, Gouka Ryuu, Kem, RLobinske, Jim North, JPAGC, and Doggieboy. Thank you all!

DariaWiki pages of recent note:

• Dead Daria Fandom Arguments (YES! Excellent!)
• Williamstown University
• Requiem
• A Taste of Hell
• Don't Sweat the Mall Stuff
• Civil War
• Canon Fodder
• Diane Fossey Award
• Home Schooled
• Cassandra (from Highland)
• Amelia (from "Camp Fear")

The One for Whom That Award Was Named

Zoologist and gorilla friend Dian Fossey was born 76 years ago today. An award was named for her at Lawndale High, allegedly an annual presentation. In Is It College Yet?, Ms. Li introduced the award thusly: "I give you the winner of this year's Lawndale High School Diane Fossey Award for dazzling academic achievement in the face of near-total misanthropy... Ms. Daria Morgendorffer!"

Is the naming of the award fair? The Internet reports that Ms. Fossey once said, "I feel more comfortable with gorillas than people. I can anticipate what a gorilla's going to do, and they're purely motivated." The Internet also reports she said, "The more you learn about the dignity of the gorilla, the more you want to avoid people." Given that Ms. Fossey was murdered by humans, not by gorillas, her prejudices do not seem far off target.

Others have pointed out that the image on the award appears to be a golden gorilla posed like Rodin's The Thinker. This is never mentioned in the series, but the picture at right makes the similarity quite clear.

Lawndale Online is still in the planning stages of an upgrade. More data about it here. You go, girl! Uh, website!

The three-day weekend for Dr. Martin Luther King Day was the time when a certain Daria fanfic took place: "Invisible Planet."

It was nine years ago today that Kara Wild posted her essay, "The Helen-Jane-Jodie Connection." Intriguing. Read it.

Now 1,109 fans in the Daria Fan Club.

FF.net

• Daria, Poem Unlimited: The Meme Wars, Part I or I Hope My Body Can Take It, by Project Pegasus (Part 1): The stage is set as the superheroine Daria does battle with the alien space invaders, Tom Sloane and Monique!
• Harry Butt-head, by Deep Metal (Part 1): Deep Metal, a true wizard with B&B stories, has taken on a parody of the Harry Potter franchise. Guess who Hermione is going to be?