You Wouldn't Like Him When He's Sensitive!

Mr. O'Neill's getting into the spirit of National Comic Book Day, but I think he's off the mark for this one. The wimpiest Daria character as one of the all-time strongest comic characters? I don't think so. Is there a comic book character out there called Spineless Man? Because he could totally nail that one.

Fanfic Update!

• The Creek Gang visit Lawndale, by sonofapreacherman (COMPLETE!): "The phone in the Morgendorffer's house rang. Before Quinn had the chance, Daria answered it. 'Hello' 'I see' 'What's your ETA?' 'Alright, but you should probably tell her that yourself' Daria handed the phone to Quinn"


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 17): "Daniel and Quinn were walking toward Lawndale high when three guys ran past them and stopped them. 'Hey, Quinn, can I carry your books?' 'Hey, Quinn, can I carry your ... pencil?' 'Hey, Quinn, can I carry your, uh, um ... got anything else?'"


• Happy Adversity, by Lady Evil (part 12): "'So, what did you think of the play?' asked Tom as he drove up to the Morgendorfer house. 'It was very, um....' I didn't understand a freaking word of it! 'Interesting.'"


• Lawndale High: The Next Generation - season 1, by Peridaniel (part 2): "Philip and Amy both stood by the front doors of the school, watching as rain pounded against the ground along with an occasional flash of lightning accompanied by a distant boom of thunder."


• Lawndale's Newest Cape (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Meester_Lee (COMPLETE!): "'Hello, everyone! I'm Linda Griffin and I'm interviewing Lawndale's latest Cape.' A girl wearing a skintight red-and-white body-suit with a capital C on her chest, her face concealed by a mask stood next to Ms. Griffin."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Nathan Is One Of Us), by Youth of Oz (COMPLETE!): "'According to this,' said Dave, disinterest and contempt warring in his voice, 'Daria's coming back in "Daria and Jodie" about her black best friend coping with modern PC-virtue-signalling, glass ceilings and other prejudice.'"


• Very down under (Iron Chef: Send a character on a nice vacation), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "The old wind wheezed around them, in a sibling sound akin to a constant whip. Helen closed its hood closely, until only a small opening to her face was possible. Despite the layers of wool, polyester, leather and cotton of her clothes, she felt far from warm."

"O'NEILL... SMASH!...... HAVE A NICE DAY!"

Marvel-ous comics-miester Stan Lee is 81 today. Tim O'Neill appears here as the Incredible Hulk in his honor. (Thanks, UU and Pinhead!)


NEW ART NEWS FLASH!

• VLORA EXCEEDS THE SPEED OF COSMIC EPIC WIN!!!

It's Time For . . . DOCTOR SCIENCE!

Today marks the twenty-ninth anniversary of the nuclear accident at Three Mile Island, near Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, which resulted in a release of radiation that affected only one person: a young English teacher named Timothy O'Neill, who was driving by the Three Mile Island nuclear plant on his way to take a job in the Lawndale school system. As a result of his exposure, Tim mutated into a fearsome half-ton creature of unlimited rage and might. Self-esteem issues caused him to go on a rampage and destroy the cities of Altoona and Scranton before heading toward Lawndale, where he taught Language Arts and headed the Drama Horizons club until April 2002, when he was laid off due to budget cuts and destroyed Wilmington, Delaware.

This has been "One Minute with Doctor Science." We now return you to your regularly scheduled Internet surfing.