How Many Bottles Are On the Wall?

I see that Brittany is bringing out another round for National Beer Day, but I hope she reminds Kevin that he shouldn't smash beer mugs on his head like he does beer cans. I hope Quinn won't be upset that Brittany appears to have usurped her role as Keg Queen!

Then again, perhaps Quinn is busy with Helen, celebrating Motherhood and Beauty Day! As long as they stay far, far away from any runways they should be just fine.

On the subject of modeling, today is the anniversary of both "This Year's Model" in 1997 and "I Loathe a Parade" in 2000. Technically the latter didn't have actual modeling, but the Fashion Club was sure posing a lot on their float!

Fanfic Update!

• Devil Woman, by mystikexplosion (part 2): "Daria arrived at Jane’s house, finding a note on the door. It read 'Went for run. Be back soon. Door is unlocked.'"


• Homecoming, by davidfalkayn (part 20): "Immediately after rematerializing, Jake patted himself down, 'Is everything there? I’m not missing anything am I?'"


• Spider Quinn 08 The Three Misfits, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "It was early evening at Lawndale High. Principal Angela Li was working late. There was a knock at her door."

Nature Abhors a Vacuum, and So Do I!

Looks like Helen didn't get the memo that today is No Housework Day, so she needs to put away the vacuum and relax. Helen, "relax" is the thing where you stop working and just enjoy yourself. It'll be difficult for you at first, but I'm sure you'll get the hang of it.

Today is also the anniversary of both "This Year's Model" in 1997 and "I Loathe a Parade" in 2000. Both featured Quinn getting utterly humiliated, but the latter had return appearances of both Ted and Tad! What are the odds?

Fandom News!

• Celebrate some good news for the Wisconsin Supreme Court!


• loqdnun shares a Sick, Sad World run by bots.


• It seems the Daria Fan Channel on Youtube got deleted.

Bottled Up

I think Jesse has taken National Beer Day much too far, but I guess he doesn't seem upset about it. I suspect Kevin's going to be celebrating this one, either by smashing cans on his head or singing all the way down from ninety-nine. Anyone else doubtful that he can count to ninety-nine at all, let alone backwards?

Today is also the anniversary for the episodes "This Year's Model" in 1997 and "I Loathe a Parade" in 2000. The Fashion Club got plenty of chances to pose in both, and Daria managed to torpedo their efforts both times. Everyone got to use their strengths!

Fanfic Update!

• And So The American Experiment Begins, by Lady Evil (part 5): "Helen went upstairs to get her daughters. 'Girls, both of the boys are here. Oh, Quinn, you look lovely! That hairdo is so cute!'"


• Common Ground (Linn's short stories (or ficlets, drabbles...)), by Linnofthewoods (part 3): "'I can't believe I'm doing this,' Daria spoke to Godzilla as she brushed her hair. 'I'm going into a movie theater full of little kids just so I can watch something I love way too much from my childhood.'"


• The Creation of Beauty, by Crow Jones (part 3): "Quinn looked in the mirror at the damage her sister did yesterday. Her cheek had completely healed from the initial slap that she had landed, that was good."


• Daria and Jane Discuss... Why the Morgendorffers Don't Celebrate Easter (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Closing Walls of Schloss Morgendorffer and Casa Lane), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "JANE: 'Hey Daria.' DARIA: 'What Jane?' JANE: 'You know that Easter is tomorrow and I was wondering...'"


• Daria on the Trail (Daria Landing In Another Fanfiction: An Experiment), by Meester_Lee (part 3): "Oh, boy, she thought. I’m definitely back in the Wild West era."


• A Kiss to Build a Scream On (General "Daria in Morrowind" Thread), by welltemperedclavier (COMPLETE!): "Quinn Morgendorffer, first of her name (so far as she knew), finally had the world in her grasp."


• Too Sexy For Her Brain (The Carbones), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Anderson are hastily throwing their clothes back on. Both of them visibly regret what they did the night before."

But How Many Bottles Are on the Wall?

Brittany's ready to celebrate National Beer Day, and if she hasn't stocked enough for everyone then we can also send Quinn, a.k.a. Keg Queen, out for reinforcements. Unless she's too busy cleaning the house steps with a toothbrush.

Today is also the anniversary of two Daria episodes, "This Year's Model" in 1997 and "I Loathe a Parade" in 2000. I guess we'll never know if Jake ever got his hands on some toilet paper.

Fandom News!

• Kem is looking for information and advice about using apps to sell items locally.


• Talk about the Powerpuff Girls reboot.


• Read and discuss Gene Wilder's thoughts on the costume design for Willy Wonka.

Well, That's It, Then. Helen Finally Snapped.

Happy National No Housework Day! For some of us, that's just about every day. As for myself, well, let's keep that between me and the dust bunnies, okay?

Today is also the anniversary of the original airings of both "This Year's Model" in 1997 and "I Loathe a Parade" in 2000. In both episodes, the Fashion Club find themselves in awkward situations, so Daria probably enjoys them quite a bit. Except for that whole Tom foreshadowing thing at the end of "I Loathe a Parade."

Fanfic Update!

• Birthday Surprise (Iron Chef: Daria character wins lottery prize), by DeacBlue (parts 2 - 7): "Daria looked down at Jake, then kneeled until their eyes were level. 'Jane and I are getting married.' Seeing the blood drain from his face, she started to giggle and waved her hands. 'No, no, that's not it, but I got you, didn't I?' Jake's mouth opened and closed a few times, and his face flushed. Finally, he was able to force out a reply. 'I guess you did, kiddo. But what's the news?' 'Well, Dad, did you hear about the lottery drawing yesterday?'" (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)


• Blast (Iron Chef: Getting Ready for the End of the World), by The Angst Guy (COMPLETE!): "The coming dust storm was awe-inspiring even in these apocalyptic times. The vast wall of rolling yellow was miles away but now it reached from the horizon to the sky's zenith, reducing all before it to insignificance. Dry air blew errant strands of sun-bleached hair over Brittany's face as she slowly chewed a bit of salty jerky, watching the storm's approach."


• Clique Swap, by psychotol (parts 29 and 30): "Sith Warrior: Meets another Sith Warrior 'What’s the situation?' Another Sith Warrior: 'Darth Krayt wants Quinn, Stacy and Tiffany killed.' Sith Warrior: 'I was hoping he’d order that.' Sith Warriors: Run off." (Part 30)


• Daddies Here Sweetheart (Iron Chef: Getting Ready for the End of the World), by Gnome (COMPLETE!): "'Hey kiddo,' slipped past his lips as he past the threshold. Bloody footprints left behind, showing his path. She raised her head and looked at him with her beautiful green eyes, auburn hair sticking to her sweat covered face. He raised his the double action revolver and leveled it at her. 'Don't worry kiddo, daddy will make everything fine again.'"


• Daria DeMartino: Esteemers with the DeMartinos, by Reven384 (part 4): "'That’s all well and good but I never said I’d get you the bugs. We can’t just spy on people,' Helen said. 'Come on now you’re a lawyer,' Daria said. 'Fine I’ll go grab some out of my room,' Helen said."


• A Distant Lawndale (Part Two), by Arena del Sur (part 1): "I was weakened with the long march. I wasn't trained to survive in the jungle, soon I came down with fever. But a soldier from Buxton took care of me. His name was Robert. –Don't worry, my man, I'll stay with you... Here, take my part. –Thanks, Robert... But you have to eat too... –Forget it! I'm not going to let you die in this ****!"


• Dylan, by J-D (part 3b): "Harvey had got as far as pointing out an old bell tower that made Dylan think of Charles Whitman, when Kris asked to be shown where the sororities were. 'Don’t you mean the fraternities?' 'Oh no', Dylan said, 'my brother knows exactly what he’s looking for.'"


• Girl Grope (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'The entire point of all of you here is that you five together make...the ultimate girl band!' The five looked at each other...and then starting laughing."


• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin’s Genie (Chapter 7), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "At 11:30 after she had come home from the Zon, Daria heard the phone ring in her room. She picked it up. 'Hello?' 'This is Daria Morgendorffer?' the person asked him a strange accent less voice. 'This is she, and you are?' Daria asked, suspiciously. 'You do not need to know at the moment, Daria.'"


• Lawndale School of Magic (IC : Daria and the School of Magic), by Reven384 (part 1): "'Did we move?' Daria asked. Daria scowled a bit. Somehow even in a world with magic where being stupid could get one killed looks still played far to big a role in popularity. Which was why Illusion spells were so popular. It was an easy school to learn and the stupid gravitated towards it. She looked at her sister with a mixture of disgust and pity."


• A Mothers Love, by ash_blackfire (part 11): "'Miss. Barksdale, have a seat.' a man in his mid forties with glasses and a slight belly said Amy entered the room. ' Your case is strange to say the least. The Lanes are like a myth around the offices here. You added another page to the growing book of "Lane Tails" we have. You also offer part of a conclusion to one as well.' the man said with hope and slight sarcasm in his voice."


• A Resentful cynic ch. 2 No party . No problem, by ST91 (part 1): "I never thought that I would say it ... at least not before being in Boston with Aunt Amy ... but I'm happy. Moving to Lawndale was the best thing that ever happened to me. But let me put things in order."


• Salted Popcorn (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "As Daria walked out of the movie theater, she licked the last of the salty taste from her fingers. She just LOVED movie theater popcorn."


• Sandi :: Well... This Sucks :: Chapter 14, by Fhujeth_x (parts 2.5 and 3): "Melissa Jel walked through the corridors of the hospital at an impatient pace, trying hard to find her childhood friend and flatmate, Kristen. Sure living with a ghost was weird, but Kristen needed a place to watch her television shows and keep herself entertained while waiting for something to happen in her stagnant afterlife. 'This can't be happening.' She looked around as she hoped to find her ghostly friend, 'Michael didn't tell me they'd be in this town.'" (Part 3)


• Shipwrecked, by Solaris (part 1): "She spun around, coming face to face with a tall man in dark robes standing a dozen feet away from her. 'Who are you? What's going on?' she asked. 'Isn't it obvious? You're having a dream.' 'No, I've experienced lucid dreams before, and they never felt like this. Besides,' she said, pointing up, 'those are my dreams.' The man smiled, 'Correct. This is a place one step removed from dreams. Well spotted. This may prove to be very promising.'"


• Star Trek: Daria - Resurrection, by echopapa (part 1): "To Cadet Daria Morgendorffer: Change of orders. All other assignments suspended for 48 hours pursuant to collaboration with FNS reporter re: interviews. Daria read an addendum at the end of the message: Make the Academy look good, Morgendorffer. It's good to know that the spirit of Ms. Li lives on, she thought wryly."


• To Annoy a Mockingbird. Chapter 05, by BF110C4 (part 5): "'Daria, why are you giving him the stats of my computer instead of yours?' 'Your old dot matrix printer is already on its lasts legs, and all the extra work I have forced on it does not help at all, so I thought about getting a new one to replace it.' Almost at once Daria became aware of her mistake. Jane face was showing her anger for everyone to see and her words held some real venom on them. 'Look I don’t need your god damn charity, just leave that thing there and leave me alone with you’re on it. Okay?'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria/Real Steel), by Waylander (COMPLETE!): "The newly-painted Black Knight stepped into a massive tunnel that led into the arena. The robot stepped into the light and the crowd cheered. His opponent stepped into the arena and received a similar greeting, mostly from the former football players and cheerleaders. The two machines stopped to face each others."


• Unnamed story (PLOT BUNNIES: free to good home), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part ): "'A short-cut?' Daria asked, with incredulity. 'Yeah,' Tom said. 'I doubt it, the layout of Lawndale is such that the only way to get to my place from here any quicker would be to fly or go under the ground,' Daria said. Tom smiled 'Funny you should mention that, Daria,' he said. He lead her towards the basement... Daria wondered what Tom was up to."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by GlitterShrooms (COMPLETE!): "'I can explain!' cried a weeping Daria. 'No bother!' screamed Jane. 'I've finally figured it out. You turned my hair carrot orange just so you could finally have your Scooby Gangbang fantasy. I should have figured it out sooner when I saw Tom buy that ugly ascot.'"

Three-In-One Day!

"This Year's Model" got its first airing on MTV 13 years ago today, with Daria in her triumphant prime, and "I Loathe a Parade" appeared 10 years ago, with Daria in a less-than-prime state. Damn heart smart chili! On top of that, this is the 16th anniversary of the Beavis and Butt-head episode, "Water Safety," which featured Daria as well, the tiniest of ninth graders at Highland High. (Save the episode quickly, people. It's pretty funny! Daria has some great moments.) We know for a fact now that Daria can swim and is "drown proofed."

For what it's worth, this is also World Health Day. Do something good for yourself. Speaking of which, this is also No Housework Day, and a Helen Morgendorffer from another universe is our mascot for that. She looks weird as a homemaker, doesn't she? Must be the eyes and her... um... never mind. (Click on any image to enlarge it greatly.)

PPMB

• An American Girl in Paris, by Quiverwing (COMPLETE!): I waited for Quinn Morgendorffer at Le Ciel De Paris, a comfortable and elegant restaurant on top of the Montparnasse Tower. It has one of the most beautiful panoramic views overlooking Paris, and not surprisingly, it was the place she had especially chosen for our lunch date. Quinn arrived thirty minutes late. She explained she had a meeting at Chanel that morning that concluded later than expected. She had to rush home to change and later struggled to find a taxi in the busy Paris afternoon. “The only rule is don't be boring and dress cute wherever you go. Life is too short to blend in,” she said with a giggle.
  
• The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): The Shot was detonated. As the plutonium went supercritical in four dimensions, a brilliant blue flash initiated a strange pyrocumulus cloud in the shape of a double Moebius loop propagating through the various realities and associated alternate dimensions, then, just as quickly, disappeared. It was in that moment, as the peculiarly dilatated flash spread across the desert floor, Daria could see the true nature of the planet Earth. Instead of the comforting curved horizon denoting an oblate spheroid with water, rocks and people spinning around its star, she could look down over the edge to see the backs of four enormous elephants holding up the flattened Earth as they stood on the shell of a tortoise whose size dwarfed theirs as he floated in space, his eyes fixed on the burning Mandelbrot set that replaced the sun. [Wow....]
• NEW! Finn Morgendorffer 41: It's Called Boston, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 5): “That’s nice.” All of the men still seemed to have their eyes on Finn, and they didn’t even look at Jane. She knew what was coming, but it was so funny to watch it unfold in front of her.
• NEW! Ring-a-Ling, by Doggieboy (Part 3): “Lovely,” the policewoman said and frowned. “Some pathetic loser, sitting at home in his underwear...or naked, getting his jollies off while scaring women with his equally pathetic fantasies. I’ll just have to make sure the Taser is all charged up when we finally arrest his freaky ass.”
  

Time for the Dog Days... But Not for DVDaria!

The poodle that appeared on Sick, Sad World in the episode "I Loathe a Parade" now appears here to celebrate the beginning of the forty Dog Days of summer. Gave her a peppermint look to go with her shoes.

BREAKING NEWS!

Are all episodes of Daria coming out on DVD at last? It looks that way! It'll be in late 2010, however, and without the music, but we can't afford to be picky. Click on the following links for details. The screen capture at the bottom of this post is lookin' good!

• TV Shows on DVD
• DVDaria
• PPMB
• SFMB
  
• More breaking news here, from Kara Wild
  

Kafkaesque author Franz Kafka, beloved of Daria so much that she has his picture hanging in her room above her work desk, was born this day 126 years ago. Read The Metamorphosis!

An interesting digression on writing for money vs. writing fanfiction for free appears at Fortress CINCGREEN. It's worth your time to read.

A new Iron Chef is up at PPMB: Shemale Westerns with Space Porn Girls! Get your story started right away!

FF.net

• Commitment Issues, by Fringeperson (Part 5): Jane pulled Daria up short as they left school for the day. Trent’s car was parked out front, and Trent was standing beside it, arms crossed and probably looking cooler than he had for quite some time. Considering the number of teeny-boppers standing fifteen feet away, whispering and giggling and giving him furtive glances.
  

PPMB

• Apocalyptic Daria: Scarlett's Tale, by Doggieboy (Part 11): Scarlett lay in the darkened alcove and held the still warm light bulb to her chest. She struggled to control her breathing as her pursuers entered the house and began their search for her. (SFMB)
• Daylight: Falling from Grace: I Should Have Been Home Yesterday, by Disco316 (Part 9): As they made their way down Lakeview Drive, Quinn, Sandi, and Stacy kept their voices down, but they couldn’t help but talk amongst themselves. “Finally, one more corner and we’ll be there,” said Sandi. Stacy frowned at Sandi. “Keep on the lookout," she said. "My bad feeling about all this hasn’t gotten any better.”
• Hard Riders & Raw Hides, by TAG (COMPLETE!): Tedi and Tomi were working tables that dark, stormy night in the Slippery Saddlehorn Saloon, waiting for customers who never came... [a shemale Western with space porn girls!]
  
• Just Friends, by Pinkminx (Part 12 or 13 or something): Daria's face fell slightly and she mentally chastised herself for it. "Are you and Monique still together?" she asked, thankful that her tone had remained indifferent. Trent shot a crooked smile toward her. "Why, you want seconds?" He let out a soft laugh and coupled it with a stifled cough. (FF.net)
  
• Lawndale's Finest, Detective Stories 2: Daughters of the Demon, by NightGoblyn (Part 3): Elsie stood in the dorm hallway, the door to her room open in front of her, and stared in shock at what she was seeing. Her keys slipped through her numb fingers and thumped on the carpet, and Nat glanced up from the book she was reading. “Come in, close the door,” Nat said quietly. She closed the heavy, leather-bound volume she’d been reading and set it aside.
• One Shot, by Pinkminx (COMPLETE!): The lights of the emergency vehicles lit up the darkened street casting streams of blue and red into the night. The noise from the idling engines drifted through the open window and mixed itself with the hushed voices of the strangers that filled the cramped apartment. "Was the door open or locked?" the soothing masculine voice asked. (FF.net)
  
• Regifted, by Ajar (Part 7): “Look,” Marina said in as stern a voice as she could muster. “If you don't do this, nobody will know who you are. You have to have enough name recognition that people will pick you.” At this point she was flustered and sweating but still maintained her smile. “If go this alone and let things stay on the back burner Graham will win, and that's something that neither of us wants to happen.”
• See Me After Class, by Disco316 (Part 1): Ryan Mickelson stood at his locker putting his books into his backpack. From behind him, Michael “Mack” Mackenzie and Kevin “QB” Thompson approached. “Hey Ry-Guy!” said Kevin. “You ready to watch us cream Oakwood?”
  
• Tales of the Ringbearers: With New Responsibility, by Richard Lobinske (Part 5): The longer it will take to reach your goal, when impatience is the path you follow. The words of his old master reminded Richard of one of his oldest weaknesses as he ignited his light saber and the orange blade emerged. Just in time, he let go of direct conscious control and rolled his wrist in an arc to deflect a burst of ice crystals fired at him by Audrey. He extended the motion into a long, sideways jump to evade a telekinetic punch from Niles. Richard landed and dropped low, gesturing with his left hand to stop Don Javier's telekinetic grasp.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Worse Possible Breakup Scenario), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "I'm sorry. I just don't think the two of us should stick together anymore."
  
• Unnamed story (Scenes That Should Be: Brains for Rent), by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): "When I was a little girl, I used to think there were monsters in my closet. I'd cry, and my Mom and Dad would come in and tell me that everything was okay, that there were no such things as monsters."

Whoa, What's the Parade All About?

Seem to have slept through some things here, sorry about that. (Because I'm posting late, those of you playing the Daria Fandom Drinking Game are required to take a drink right now.) What's been going on, hmmm....

Thanks to Brother Grimace for jump-starting me with the post about dogs. I like dogs. Thanks, man!

"This Year's Model" and "I Loathe a Parade" both premiered on MTV two days ago, on the 7th. Missed it. Still gives me shivers, the penguin snuff porn in the latter. TYM appeared 12 years ago, and ILAP 9 years ago. I think.

Two Beavis and Butt-head episodes featuring Daria premiered this week as well: "Water Safety" on Tuesday (15 years ago) and "Candy Sale" on Wednesday (14 years ago). Daria doesn't say anything in the latter, but she apparently sells some boxes of candy (complaining about it all the while, no doubt).

MDetector5 has begun posting seriously interesting fan art of Brittany and Quinn in bikinis. They are worth examining, purely in the name of science of course.

Oh, yeah, zombies. Here is more data for those writing Ringbearer stories about zombies. BRAAAIIINS!

Roxanne M has another Iron Chef: The Sloanes Are Broke! Think about it, and write.

There is a lot of fanfic to catch up with, so stay tuned.

Caption Contest!

What is Daria looking at?

(Give your answer below in Comments.)

Subliminal Messages in Daria

Some years ago I had a class in Mass Media and began to wonder about the use of subliminal advertising in TV, movies, magazines, and so on. Corporate marketing people have been very clever about slipping subtle messages into seeming innocent pictures, and recently I began to wonder if this had ever been done with our favorite show, Daria.

At first I just laughed the idea off, but after a while I began to investigate whether certain scenes were carefully altered to offer the viewer more than was expected, such as that famous Jessica Rabbit scene about which I am not going to say more, or various rumors about suggestive scenes in Disney's Aladdin. Could this have happened with Daria as well?

Take "I Loathe a Parade," a shot from which is shown here. Is there something about Daria's posture or look that has a certain prurient or risqué quality to it? Because for some reason I feel really hot and bothered looking at this shot, and I can't figure out why. I suspect there has been foul play here courtesy of the Daria animators, having included some subliminal obscenity to upset the audience, but the buried imagery or words are not evident to me. Further investigation is called for, and I shall report on my findings as they become clear. Stay tuned.