Thursday, April 8, 2010

"Who'd like a candy bar?"

Back in her Highland period, Daria appeared in the Beavis and Butt-head episode "Candy Sale," which premiered on MTV on this day 15 years ago. Daria had a nonspeaking role, but oddly she fell for the transparent ploy that "Mister Candy" uses to get the kids to sell candy bars for the school. Maybe this kind of stuff made her more cynical later in life. (Click on the class pic to enlarge it and see what everyone is doing while "Mister Candy" talks. No wonder Daria wanted to get out of Highland as fast as she could.)

  • NEW! Endings Are Beginnings, by Dark Kuno (COMPLETE!): I sat in my hotel room and stared at the screen of my laptop. The cursor blinked back at me, unmoving as it had for the past hour. I leaned back in my chair and let out a frustrated sigh. Nothing. That’s exactly what happened, as it had the five times I tried before to produce anything of value for this assignment.
  • Falling into College: The Clip Show, by RLobinske (Part 2): "Welcome back, you’re just in time to see the introduction of one of our more unusual friends and Jane’s first college roommate.
  • Finn Morgendorffer 41: It's Called Boston, by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): “Do we have to go anywhere?” “No. We’ve got time. Or we could check out that jetted tub.” “Jane, we tried that, it didn’t work as well.” “Practice makes perfect.”
  • FORMER MTV STARLET INJURED IN ACCIDENT, by LOTR_Dan (snippet): Brittany Taylor—the blonde bombshell from MTV's Daria and more recently E!'s Tracking Taylor—revived injuries to her neck after a nasty collision on the 5 North.
  • NEW! Holiday Air, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "Eleven years after 'Depth Take a Holiday' aired, it is still controversial, so I'm going to ask the most obvious question: Are you real holidays or just actors?" "We're real, dammit!" "For those that truly believe."
  • The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (Part 22): "That segment that Merritt assigned where she asked us about comparing Edward Rochester from Jane Eyre to Max De Winter. I'm getting the impression that Merritt wants us to tie that in with du Maurier's views on sex. What do you think?" "I think we're almost thinking the same thing. After all, you have to put down what the prof wants. Individual thinking? God knows what you'll get for a grade."
  • NEW! It’s What’s for Dinner, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): “Hello!” Daria shouted as she opened the door at 1111 Glen Oaks lane. Not that she had any particular desire to see her family, but there hadn’t been any food at Jane’s and it was well past dinner time. No answer. She sighed and opened the door wider. Turned out the family was at home.
  • Miss Scarlett's School for Boys, by Respite (COMPLETE!): “Hey,” he said, as nonchalantly as he could manage. “Hey yourself,” Daria answered. “If you're looking for my friend, she had to—” “No, I—I wasn't looking for your friend. My name's Tom.” Tom stuck his hand out to Daria in greeting.
  • NEW! Moon Shot, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): “I heard,” said one such unfortunate, as the band and some of the crew gathering in the hotel room to wind down after the show, “that if you cut up one of these horse pills and take just a little bit with another stimulant like coffee, you get a really nice kick that lasts for hours. And you don’t crash.”
  • THOMPSON'S LOCKER ROOM RAGE—CAUGHT ON TAPE, by LOTR_Dan (snippet): Thompson, who has not been seen since the incident, is currently being sought by law enforcement.
  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Ouch Time), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): "You know, kiddo, I'd like to believe that you're aware enough even now to know that there's nothing sadistic in my actions." (Daria/Kill Bill)
  • Up With Chuck, by Ticknart (COMPLETE!): The business world knows Mr. Ruttheimer as a ruthless axe man; buying internet companies, cutting them up, keeping the parts that he likes for himself, and then selling the left-over pieces. He's also built his own news search site, designed around an algorithm he developed early in his college career. Most of you visiting this site, though, know him as "Upchuck" from the late 1990s MTV hit series Daria.

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