A Feisty Barbarian!

Happy birthday to the late Robert E. Howard, creator of the character Conan the Barbarian. Howard, born in 1906, probably had something a little more fearsome than Upchuck in mind.

Fanfic Update!

• Across Space (Iron Chef: Throughout The Ages), by neonhomer (COMPLETE!): "Daria stood up, straightened her uniform, and spoke. 'Romulan vessel, this is Captain Daria Charles, of the Federation Starship USS Charlestown. You're well into Federation space and you better have a damn good reason for being here.'"


• The Amazing Adventures of Captain Invincible!, by Erin M. (part 3): "'What were ya readin', anyway?' Applejack asked. 'Musta been pretty interestin'. Some new history o' magic book, or somethin'?' 'No, nothing like that,' Twilight answered. 'It was--' She trailed off as she realized what she was about to say. Applejack noted the change in Twilight's mood. 'Twi? You okay?' she asked."


• And On That Day it Ended, by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "It had not been a chance meeting. She had come home to visit her parents, perchance see old friends. He had been there waiting for her, perched on the doorstep. His flannel shirt and dark denim pants had thrown her at first, as with his thicker build and very alert eyes. Then he had smiled, and she had seen the boy she had known all those years ago. It was a sweet reunion."


• As Though She Had Done It All Before..., by Shiva (part 1): "The last thing that Daria saw as she breathed her last was a picture of herself in High School, standing next to Jane in front of her old high school... There was darkness, a brief sense of nothingness, then a flash of white light. Then everything came into focus."


• Bromwell or Bust, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "She tore open the envelope, lips moving silently as she read the letter. Finally, it hit home and she sank to her knees, tears leaking from her eyes: She would not be going to Bromwell."


• A Child of the Acorn, by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "Jake viewed himself in the living room mirror. He exuded a ruddy vanity as he applied the last of the war paint to his cheek and tied the green bandana around his head, fitting perfectly with his camouflage outfit. An amateur Rambo among suburban men, he supposed."


• Club Crisis (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "The club was jumpin' and the beat was thumpin' and all the attractive young people wearing little were getting funky - except Artie, who shouldn't have really been there - when something changed in the air. Literally."


• Daria and Jane: On Gun Protests (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Jane: 'Say Daria, you think these rednecks will figure out that America will never ban guns?'"



• Daria the Unicorn (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "The Cynical Duo were walking to school as per the script when Jane turned to her bitter friend and asked out of the blue, 'Say Daria, what was the most embarrassing thing you ever did to your parents?'"


• Fallout Runaway Mirror (Iron Chef: Funhouse Mirror Time (AU Crossovers with Canon)), by Vukodlak (part 1): "They were calling it the crossover. One day you'd be strolling along and you'd run into yourself from an alternate world, time who knew. So far they had calculated the existence of at least 967 alternate realities. The person would come and then after hours, day's maybe weeks return home as if nothing had happened. They called these people The Visitors or AU's"


• Going Buckwild (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'We gonna have ourselves a ball too-night!' Daria shouted from the driver's seat. She straightened out her Daisy Dukes, pulled her pigtails taut, and gripped the wheel with flying vigor. This was going to be one hell of a night."


• Heroes and Villains Part One: The Incident, by Reven384 (part 4): "'Tom this is John Doe it has been taken care of. I will meet you at the agreed meeting spot,' he said. 'Good I will have your reward,” Tom said."


• How DeMartino and DeFoe Got Together, by Gnome (COMPLETE!): "The small smile on her face at the good deed she was doing for the rest of us slipped from her face as she saw me about to destroy her chimes. She gently lowered the tray onto the table and said, 'good afternoon Anthony,' before she started to walk out of the room. That is when I decided that I was going to be a complete idiot. I jumped off the table and said, 'why did you have to bring in this damn thing?'"


• Jagged Little Pill (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "Jake scrolled down his inbox. Funny how some new-fangled system comes out with all the junk from the last one, times twenty, he thought."


• Life is Like T-Rex, by -sam (COMPLETE!): "'"First, I would like thank you all for coming in. Second, I am reminding all of you that this briefing is classified Top Secret, so no running off to our friends at the Prophet. Now with that out of the way, the Auror Office has reason to believe the Death Eater Jason Thomas Harris is going to attempt an attack on the Hogwarts Express when it returns from Hogsmeade.'" (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20) (Part 21) (Part 22) (Part 23) (Part 24) (Part 25) (Part 26) (Part 27) (Part 28) (Part 29)


• Mad Dog V.S.........., by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Millhouse (Mad Dog) Morgendorffer had his prey in his sights: a small horse across the plains."


• The Market (Iron Chef: Throughout The Ages), by Gnome (COMPLETE!): "She was perusing the wares of a traveling merchant, and James could not take his eyes from her."



• Reflection In A Bright Shop Window (Iron Chef: Funhouse Mirror Time (AU Crossovers with Canon)), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "Her reflection in the shop window was her, but not her. The woman reflected in the shop window was a few years older, late twenties maybe. Instead of her usual red shirt, black shorts and boots she wore a beautiful fifties sea green dress tightly nipped in at the waist before flowing out wide, a white scarf on her neck and a pair of heels so high Jane had no idea how she was still standing."


• TDJS CH.4 Boston Baby!, by ST91 (parts 1 and 2): "Helen awoke with a start, sweating and her heart pounding. 'Helen are you okay?' Asked a worried Jake. Helen gasped for a few seconds then said, 'Yeah Jake ... I'm fine. It was just a nightmare.'" (Part 2)


• Through the Fire and Flames (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'Well, men,' he started, casually removing cotton balls from his ears, 'that was terrible. And this is coming from someone who forces his guests to listen to "Baby" on an infinite loop.' His voice, while inhumanly deep, retained a crisp tinge of humor in its malice. 'Let me introduce myself. I am Satan. I suppose it seems pretty obvious what I'm going to do next.'"


• Trents Night Off, by Gnome (COMPLETE!): "So here I am, sprawled out on the couch, the first flick with a bald guy clutching a handgun I found in Lackluster video playing on the screen, a six-pack of watery brown liquid that calls itself beer and a bag of generic chips close at hand. And most important, a pipe full of a subtle blend of Rusty Venture and Purple Joy ready to be lit. That is why I reacted a tad poorly when the door slammed open and the sounds of heavy boots striking the threadbare entryway."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Funhouse Mirror Time (AU Crossovers with Canon)), by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "It was so FRUSTRATING! They were so CLOSE! How dare the committee pull their funding at this crucial moment. They'd be able to work out the bugs in the system soon, she was sure of it! If they'd only let her try a human subject, from inside someone would be able to control..."



• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Quinn took a sip of water, and turned to her fellow Fashion Club member. 'Your momma's such a ho, your dad asked mine if he was watching Entertainment Tonight, and my dad said "right after you leave for midnight bowling!"'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Lord Voldemort,' she cooed, 'Give me some lovin' with that snake-face of yours!'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "The size nine steel toed boot crashed into the face of Dan Hibiki. It had, like many of Daria's attacks in the last few minutes, caught him mid-taunt."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'You have no idea how long I've been waiting to share these moments with you, Daria,' she said, a weak smile entering her expression. 'Without you, I was just another idiot girl gallivanting all over the countryside. But I'm not. Now that I have you.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "Jake looked at the scattered metallic devices lining the family driveway. His smile waxed despotic at his creation. Do-it-yourself squirrel traps, he thought. Let's see the little bastards get out of these.."


• Want, by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "I think I may be in love. At least I think that is the term I should be using. I want to be around her as much as I can. I want to hear her voice whenever she speaks. I want to be there whenever she needs a hug or shoulder to cry on. Yes. I believe I am in love with her."


• We Are One, by PrecambrianStudios (part 14): "I am Quinn and she is mine her body is mine and my own we have shared nothing we have lost everything Lawndale La Cueva Highland Lawndale reborn they appear in front of my eyes in the land of Morpheus and everything is one the one with the scars the weak one the smart one the rebellious one the supportive one we are same and unalike I am a freak I am not unique I am unique I am Daria her face is mine I turned like a coward I am who I am our hearts beat in tandem"

Be Especially Aware of the Fashionable Penguins

Happy Penguin Awareness Day! Look! A penguin! Be aware of it!

Today is also the anniversary of the birth of Italian film director Federico Fellini, born on this day in 1920. Fellini is best known within Daria because of the infamous film festival in "Fire!" that kicked off Jane's suspicion of Tom and Daria. Oh, Fellini. You don't even know what chaos you caused.

Fandom News!

• The lists of nominated visual works and written works are up. Time to get your votes in for the 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards!


• percussivemaintenance is making fandom famous! Find out how in the thread.


• See where MartinUK is visiting next and let him know if you can meet him there.


• PrecambrianStudios has an idea for creating a Daria audio show.


• Discuss an oversight in the episode "Monster" as pointed out by J-D.


• Shiva posted a new Iron Chef in Creative Writing: Party at Casa Lane.

Media Shout Out!

An article in Animation Magazine discussed Daria and Is It College Yet? on this day in 2002. The writeup was much more complimentary than Val ever was. Check it out to see what Glenn Eichler had to say.

Fanfic Update!

• Dylan, by J-D (part 17a): "When Rod had shut the front door behind him, Dylan went through to the kitchen. His parents were both taking a pull at their respective drinks, so Kris spoke first. 'Cousin Edwin's getting married. Twenty-one's too young to be fitted with a ball and chain.'"


• Glasses and Lipstick (chapter 3), by oni (part 1): "As she came to a stoplight, Linda saw something a little further down the street on the left side. Sitting in the front parking lot of one of the town's cheap motels, was Jake's car."


• Guilt, by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "'Oh boy kiddos! Can you believe it! Berlin!' Jake cried joyously to the night, as various Germans stared at him like he was a lost puppy. 'I can't wait to try out the jelly doughnuts!'"


• Love at the Time of Cynicism (Iron Chef: Throughout The Ages), by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Daria Morgendorffer walked disconsolately in the park of Liverpool. She had just learned that her father had been planning, for a long time, her betrothal. It's not fair, she thought as she walked through the trees, it is not right. What right do they have to decide my life?"


• The Mageborn Cynic : Daria & the School of Magic : Part 2, by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "By the time Chancellor Li had summoned the town council and leading Guildsmen to a meeting to report on the true events of the day it was really too late. The story had stretched and grown until it bore little or no relationship to the facts. One word was now spoken not just with awe but with abject terror: Hellsbane!"


• The Mageborn Cynic : Daria & the School of Magic : Part 3, by peetz5050 (part 1): "It was their captain, the kinetic, that interested her though. He was her classmate, Michael (Mack) of Clan Mackenzie. He was also one of the students earmarked for her to give special instruction to, a potential archmage. He did indeed have some skill."



• RA Holiday Special : The Holidays are just Crazy!, by DIsaac (part 12): "DANI: OK, she has officially lost her ever loving mind! JUDY: Strangely, this isn't the worst. You should have seen her after that Brett Strand guy broke up with her. (Car speeds up again) DANI: (nervously) Stacy, this isn't NASCAR. STACY: Sorry, but the daily allowance of f**ks that I give has been reached for the day. Try again tomorrow."


• The Ravaged Land, by PrecambrianStudios (parts 1 and 2): "Either the pilot really sucks, or something was in the complimentary soda, Daria thought as she sat down next to Jake in the plane seat. She looked out the window: fog obscured any possible view of the ground." (Part 2)


• Sonoma Coma, by jtranser (part 4): "'O.K., Jane, it starts out the usual way: selected members of our faculty interview promising applicants interested in Dream Psychology and push the Breede experience for all its worth. The kids ask us all the usual earnest generic questions about our department which we answer with profound sounding wordlike noises. After 15 minutes of such scripted reassurance, It's our turn to ask the questions and decide if they're going to get in.'"


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Daria picked up her phone. 'Speak quickly.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Jane held the banana in her hand with a hungry curiosity. 'What should we do with it?'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Decked out in a waitress' outfit, along with Jane, Quinn, and Jodie, Daria grumbled, 'I can't believe I'm doing this.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "The ocean stretched out to the ends of the earth and beyond, the ripples cascading into the distance with each gust of wind. Intelligence, however, stretched merely to the middle of the raft, as Daria and Kevin found themselves stranded on the briny."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "As Daria passed by Quinn's room, something struck her as...odd. The normal study in regurgitated pink was replaced by a dim light emanating from the darkness. One focus of the eyes later, she discovered the source. Quinn sat at her computer, all but engrossed by whatever she was looking at."


• We Are One, by PrecambrianStudios (part 13): "'Pops! Where'd you put my medication!' Gage called from the kitchen inside Harris Studios. He furiously searched around the cabinetry, which only made his headache worse. Dammit, where the hell is it? I know I put it somewhere on the counter...."

The Rrrowring Twenties

On this day in 1919, the Eighteenth Amendment was ratified. This signaled the start of Prohibition the following year, which ended drinking in the U.S. forever. Ha. Fortunately for old timey bartended Upchuck, as far as I can tell drinking became even more popular than ever.

Today is also National Nothing Day, which we observe by...doing nothing, I suppose.

...

There. Holiday observed. You're welcome.

Fandom News!

• Roentgen wonders about the ages of Sam and Chris Griffin during the series.


• If Daria was re-cast, who would be in it? Wouter asks for everyone's thoughts on voice actors.


• Two new Iron Chefs have been posted in Creative Writing: PrecambrianStudios's The Sheldon Quotation Theorem and SinisterExaggerator's One Line at a Time.


• breitasparrow has an announcement about her commissions.

Looking Back, Eleven Years Ago

It was on this day in 2002 that the special "Look Back in Annoyance" aired on MTV. It was, in Daria's words, "a cheap-ass clip show," but we did get a few fun tidbits like Daria's fling with 'N Sync and Jane's aspirations of working at Disney.

Be sure to nominate for the 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards! Time is almost up!

Fanfic Update!

• Blue's Reflection, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "She stared at her reflection, her blue eyes having acquired wisdom during the whirlwind that was her career, her blond hair flowing down, the elaborate stage makeup having been cast aside for the moment."


• A Cynical Earth, by RLobinske (part 3): "Dorothy looked around and quietly said, 'Why were you here and where have you gone?' 'Who was here?' Daria asked. That caught Dorothy's attention. 'Somebody I used to know in my younger days – much younger.'"


• Daria's Voyager, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "'Daria Morgendorffer, I served with your father on the Al-Batani. I wonder if we could go somewhere and talk.' 'About What?' 'About a job we'd like you to do for us,' the Captain asked. Sarcasm showed heavily in her tone."


• Daughters of Lies (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "'Witches are bad, right?' Old Man McGrundy stared at the youth for a moment, then sat on his log with a weary sigh. 'And where did you hear that, girl?' The blond opened her mouth to respond, but was preempted. 'From your father, no doubt.'"



• The Divine Cynic, by PrecambrianStudios (part 2): "Gods? Huh. How about that. And I'm a half-god. That probably comes with some perks. Now if only this dream could go on forever. However, why would my dreams include Quinn?"


• Dylan, by J-D (part 16): "Coach sighed. 'Kris, if you flunk Language Arts there's nothing we can do to keep you on the team.' 'Then we just have to make sure I don't flunk Language Arts, right? You can have a word with Ms FitzPatrick, right?'"


• Heroes and Villains Part One: The Incident, by Reven384 (part 2): "'The less you know the better,' John Doe said, 'But don't worry the only people who know you are involved are me and those guys who were chasing you. So if you want me to get to them in time to help you should leave me be. I promise you when this is over no one will know what happened tonight and you can just live your life.'"


• The Mageborn Cynic : Daria & the School of Magic : Part 2, by peetz5050 (parts 10 and 11): "'Lady Daria is correct, there was an archmage among our foes though I cannot distinguish one mage from another based on their magics alone.' Anthony added." (Part 11)


• The Night Helen Saved Christmas, by Aloysius (part 4): "A raven-haired young woman clothed only in a black, hip-length satin robe stretched out on the bed and yawned. Then she sighed as she propped herself up and sipped from an opened bottle of Coca-Cola. She said, 'Dammit, Jake, did you really think that she'd still be pining for you? It's been more than a year since you dumped her, you know.'"


• Quinn's Code 07: The Grounded Geek, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 5): "'Time for gaming then.' she thought. However as she turned on the X-Box, there was sudden burst of music and the house vibrated. She knew what it was; Daria playing her music with the amplifiers turned up to the highest settings. Very annoying."


• TDJS Ch.3 Kung-fu party, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Although Helen had told him to call for any special needs, Dario felt the jitters grow as he approached Lawndale High. Instinctively, he took Jane's hand who, noting her boyfriend's growing nervousness,squeezed his hand reassuringly. 'Don't worry, I'm sure that nothing will happen and if anything does, I'll be by your side.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Sheldon Quotation Theorem), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'Oh, hey, Daria,' she started, 'could you help me out with something? I desperately need some wood right now.'"


• We Are One, by PrecambrianStudios (parts 11 and 12): "Jake uttered a moan, which suddenly turned into a scream. 'Yow! My eyes! Helen, I'm blind!' Helen peered at them.'Oh dear, Jake. You burst your blood vessels in both of them. Again.' Daria whispered to her twin, 'You mind getting the camera?' 'Yes, I do, actually.' 'Fine. Damn you.'" (Part 12)


• What The Photographer Did (Iron Chef: Random Pairing Challenge!), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "The doorbell rang. Erin Chambers, wearing her wedding gown, days away from her vow renewal, happily and energetically bounced up from her couch and answered the door to her apartmen. A blond, bespectacled young man in a blue polo shirt stood on her porch. He was holding a camera."

Still Better than Bing and the Spatula Man

Happy birthday to radio personality Howard Stern, born on this day in 1954. I'm not convinced Jesse is the most appropriate person to impersonate the shock jock, though, since Stern is known for saying things that are rude and controversial and Jesse is known for saying, well, "cool." And sometimes "Yeah." I suppose I could see Jesse getting on the air just so he could air Mystik Spiral songs, though.

Fandom News!

• Nominate your picks for the 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards! Have you nominated yet? How about now? Or now? Done yet?


• Deref discusses the fires in his part of Australia.


• Whatever happened to the Paperpusher? Roentgen is wondering.


• CR85747 considers whether Daria is a left-brain or a right-brain.


• Daria got a mention on an episode of The Soup. Check it out!


• Kem asks for people's thoughts about the Oscar nominees.


• Three new Iron Chefs have been posted in Creative Writing: CR85747's Iron Chef Iron Chef, Roentgen's Perfumes based on Daria characters, and JoeMerl's Random Pairing Challenge!.

Find a Hallmark Card for That!

Today is Houseplant Appreciation Day! Time to show your houseplants how much you care about them, perhaps simply by watering them. (This is not recommended if your houseplants are plastic.)

Have you nominated for the 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards? If not, why not? What, are you chicken or something?

Fanfic Update!

• The Amazing Adventures of Captain Invincible!, by Erin M. (part 2): "I wonder who else he wrote into his stories? Maybe I could just take a quick peek. No, Twilight! You swore you wouldn't intrude on his privacy again. Leave it alone!"


• At the Dinner Table (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'So Daria how was school today?' Helen asked while setting down the roast beef she had lovingly prepared for her lovely family."


• A Cynical Earth, by RLobinske (part 2): "After the man fled, Dorothy turned and saw Daria. Eyes still lit with anger at the other employee, she said, 'I will not tolerate people hiding things from me.' Caught a little off-guard, Daria said, 'I completely agree.'"


• The Divine Cynic, by PrecambrianStudios (part 1): "The first thing Daria felt as she awoke was a pounding headache. When she opened her eyes, she found that her glasses were gone and that she laid in a very comfy bed, that just so happened to be located in an infirmary."


• The Mageborn Cynic : Daria & the School of Magic : Part 2, by peetz5050 (parts 8 and 9): "Steven smiled back and said. 'Lady Daria, it is an honor to make your acquaintance. I just a short while ago had the privilege of welcoming your sister, Lady Quinn, and her escort, Lord Geoffrey of House Dawmare, please proceed indoors out of this chill, my daughter is eagerly awaiting your company. Please, everyone, come inside.' Steven noticed that even though Lord Trent was quick to offer his arm to Lady Daria he seemed somewhat distant and perhaps even cold in his expression." (Part 9)



• A New Beginning, by LadieTAG (part 7): "Quinn stared at her sister for several moments. She saw the sadness mixed with kindness and hope in the older girl's eyes. Then, she realized that this was the first time in almost decade that she had seen her sister. Not just a decade, the first time ever."


• President Sue Bee (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Mein People!' President Sue bellowed into her microphone, 'The time is at hand for a NEW and GLORIOUS SOCIETY!'"


• RA Holiday Special : The Holidays are just Crazy!, by DIsaac (part 11): "JANE: Didn't your family do Thanksgiving? JESSE: Me and my sis try to avoid it. Besides, we do Christmas big in our family. JANE: Aren't you NOT avoiding it by being here? JESSE: I'm here for moral support... And pie. Mostly pie."


• Rocky Horror? (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'Okay, Daria, just sit still for a moment here.' Jane could no longer take Daria's complaints about not being able to hear her. 'One...two...three!'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Fresh takes on Veronica Morgendorffer), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Daria stared at the thing in the vat in curiosity. 'That's me.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Brain Camper (COMPLETE!): "[Daria puts her head on the shoulder of the girl next to her] Daria: I love you."


• The Walking Dead: The Tale of Lori, by PrecambrianStudios (part 1): "Lori's breath caught in her throat. A small girl in a nightgown clutching a stuffed bear emerged from behind one of the derelict vehicles. Her head down, she quietly shuffled in the opposite direction. Lori considered for a moment calling out to the girl, but thought to herself, I can't let anyone drag me down. And the girl is probably one of them. It's time to go, Lori."


• We Are One, by PrecambrianStudios (part 10.5): "'Do either of you want a future?! What you two did could be seen by colleges for the rest of your lives! It's going to take me months to-' 'To what, mom?' Daria inquired flatly. 'Do you intend to punish us by having us exonerated by the legal system?'"

"See something you like or just browsing?"

Happy Male Watcher's Day! Jane is celebrating with great enthusiasm, but I suspect Daria would not join her.

Also, happy birthday to the late (or is he?) Elvis Presley, born on this day in 1935. Whether you're a fan of Young Elvis, Old Elvis, or the bird from "It Happened One Nut," let's all take a moment to wish The King a good one--wherever he is.

Fandom News!

• You still have one week left to nominate for the 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards. What are you waiting for?


• Kara Wild outlines the board policy for "hard swearing" and YouTube videos.


• Jeremy Garrett has a question about the Daria IRC chatrooms.


• Share your biggest disappointments in gaming in the Weapons of Mass Distraction forum.


• Wouter posted a new Iron Chef in the Easel: 57 channels and nothing on...

Awwwww!

Jake and Helen certainly look cozy together, because today is Cuddle Up Day! So go ahead and snuggle with anyone or anything you like. Daria will probably choose a book.

Today is also the day that Joan of Arc is often presumed to have been born in 1412. I wouldn't recommend cuddling up to her, though, as things could get a little warmer than you might like.

Please remember to nominate your favorite fanfics and art for the 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards! If you don't nominate, who will?

Fanfic Update!

• Abattoir Blues (1): The Hitman and Her, by LongSnakeMoan (part 10): "I look across her stance, from that determined face to those taut, slim arms and her flat stomach. Now she's put some weight on and lost that gauntness she has a body that most girls would kill for and almost immediately that familiar prickle of shame runs through my stomach for looking at her like that. I hope to God she never finds out what a low life scumbag I am."


• The Affectations of Nicholas Nebula, by Boz-pot (part 1): "Nicholas Neville Nigel Nebula, known as 'Hildebrand' by his parents, was twenty-nine years old. He disliked his pet-name, but disliked even more the long alliterative name with which his father, who was ob­sessed with what he called 'The Number N', had chosen to christen him. "


• The Amazing Adventures of Captain Invincible!, by Erin M. (part 1): "Twilight Sparkle had a dilemma. It wasn't a large dilemma, exactly. The fate of Equestria wasn't at stake, nor did the lives of innocent ponies hang in the balance. It wasn't that kind of dilemma. It was a dilemma much worse than that."


• Daria and Stacy (IC: Stacy Morgendorffer), by Shiva (part 2): "Striding in with Daria was a girl with short cut black hair, ear piercings, red lipstick, a black shirt that was mostly covered by a red lab coat, shorts with black leggings, and combat boots. 'Hi Daria!' Stacy said as they approached, Kristen and Cindy wore twin facial expressions of surprise at seeing Lawndale's resident loner, Jane Lane in the company of another human being."


• Daria's World, by baelparagon (part 1): "'I think I'll do fine dad, though I don't know if others will see it that way. See you dad.' As Daria walked off Jake was happy to pull away and get lost in his usual oblivious haze at his daughters positive words. A small part of him couldn't shake the cold effect his daughter still had on him, but this part as always was ignored along with reality."



• Glasses and Lipstick (chapter 2), by oni (COMPLETE!): "Meeting eyes with Quinn, Sandi recognized the calm facial mask that Quinn was putting on display to her right then since it was the very look the she herself wore most of the time at school. 'God, she's pissed,' Sandi thought to herself before trying to talk. 'Quinn... look, I'm,' she closed her eyes for a moment and let out a strained sigh, '...Sorry, ok? I know I shouldn't have snapped at you like that but I was angry.'"


• Go Long (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Ahem.' Kevin looked up. It was Anthony DeMartino, looking at him. 'Oh. Hi, Mr. D. Or...Anthony...or whatever the hell. I mean, you're not my teacher...not anymore...so I guess I can call you what I want to, huh?'"


• Got a Little Captain In Ya? (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Daria was forced back into the waking world since there was an inconsiderate jackass beating on her skull."


• Heroes and Villains, by Reven384 (parts 1 and 2): "It was just another night for the students of Lawndale high. They never paid any mind to the large truck that was about to pass them bye until the explosion knocked them to the ground. All four girls screamed as a purple gas filled the air enveloping them." (Part 2)


• RA Holiday Special : The Holidays are just Crazy!, by DIsaac (parts 9 and 10): "JANE: Corny? But corny and holidays go together! MACK: Well, it starts corny. And then the boards games comes out and everybody get competitive. JANE: How competitive? MACK: So competitive that we don't bring up Jenga since that controversial game a couple of years ago. They said my brother, Jermaine... Jane, no Jackson jokes..." (Part 10)


• Sandi's Fate (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "On the dark streets of Atlantic City, a pair of twenty something bitter cynics were driving down a road, snarking the hell about the hookers on display."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Quinn looked up through the tittering laughter directed at her from several points in the room, and fixed the offending speaker with a look that made Eric take two steps back from the table."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Daria, I'd like you to meet Justin Bieber. Justin, this is Daria Morgendorffer.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked at her grandfather, and her grandfather looked at her. Nine years old and judging him. How dare she?"



• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Jane smiled, briefly, and then pulled the silenced Colt out of her jacket. 'I don't think I heard that right. Did you say "I'm your bitch, Miss Lane"?'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "Daria unwrapped the birthday present from Jane and looked into the box."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Ranger Thorne (COMPLETE!): "The conversation between siblings was suddenly brought to an end when Trent and Jane turned to look at the door to their house as it swung open."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Can you believe it, Sandi?' Quinn said. 'I found a bottle of crappy wine in my sister's room. I think she's becoming an alky!'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Jane, I kissed Tom.' Graham said as he approached the artsy girl."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "Daria stirred. Her elbow bumped the near-empty bottle of Captain Morgan's Spiced, which in turned tumbled off the bed. Her head throbbed with the excess of liquor, and she opened her eyes as far as she could without the light being painful."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "The Washington State forest was aglow with the pale forms of Edward Cullen and family, friends, and lover (because at this point, polygamy would sort of compromise the whole 'sacrificing one's humanity' pact)."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "Tom sighed happily and held Daria's still form closer."


• When A Daria Meets A Mary Sue (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Many years later, Daria would look upon MS Day with a mixture of feelings that she would then proceed to wash down with a fifth of vodka, regardless of where she was and what she was doing."

Not Just a Good Idea...It's the Law!

Happy birthday to the late Sir Isaac Newton, born on this day in 1643. Newton had many achievements and accomplishments, but he was best known for formulating his theory of gravity. Bad news for Sandi. Good news for Stacy.

On the bright side, now Roger won't be quite so lonely on that cow.

Fandom News!

• The 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards need your nominations! Go on--you know you want to! And don't forget that the deadline is January 15th.


• Learn about and discuss the gigantic Aeroscraft in a new thread.


• Discuss an article about the show Knightmare.


• PrecambrianStudios has a question regarding non-Daria fanfics.

Cynic from Another Planet

Today is National Science Fiction Day, celebrated on this day in honor of author Isaac Asimov's birthday. Daria's getting into the spirit of things, although this won't help those "atomic Communist from Mars" rumors.

Don't forget to nominate for the 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards! The deadline is January 15th.

Fanfic Update!

• A Cynical Earth, by RLobinske (part 1): "Going around her desk, Dorothy also sat down, while letting one hand rest on a wood and glass case set on the wall. Inside the case was a worn leather jacket covered with patches, including a prominent 'A' centered on the back. Dorothy looked across the desk and said, 'Welcome to A Charitable Earth.'"


• Daria and Stacy (IC: Stacy Morgendorffer), by Shiva (part 1): "Stacy used the rear-view mirror to check on her big sister, in her combat boots, ratty jeans, black Nine Inch Nails shirt, glasses, but nicely combed auburn hair. She unknowingly returned Daria's smirk from earlier and thought once again, 'God my sister's cool.'"


• DW: The Many Doctors, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 11): "The Doctor emerged from the TARDIS. 'What happened, everyone got captured?' he asked. 'Yes, we all put up a fight, but they were all captured,' Daniel said. 'We were lucky to escape!' Lana said. 'Right, one rescue party coming up!' the Doctor said."


• Dylan, by J-D (parts 15c and 15d): "When they asked the man behind the counter about the shark, he pointed to a display case that housed only one huge tooth. 'What?!' exclaimed Rod, and Dylan could see that he was working himself up into a synthetic burst of outrage, the kind that Dylan recalled so well from their memorable trip to the Mall of the Millennium. He grabbed his friend by the sleeve and whispered in his ear." (Part 15d)


• Forever Together, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "The years had passed and it showed. Her face was furrowed by deep wrinkles and her hair, once black as pitch, had turned white as snow. Only her eyes had kept the same shade of sapphire blue they had when she was young."



• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin's Genie (Chapter 8), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 6): "'You must be mistaken,' Quinn said, trying not to cave. 'Why do I do that?' 'I'm not mistaken!' Linda said. 'You are!' Nicole dared. 'I'm not mistaken. There is damage to my house and my sons both said that you were there!' Linda said."


• Luna and the Moose, by Erin M. (part 5): "He snorted and stood up straight, straightening his vest. Time (and moose, apparently) waited for no pony. Less than three hours until dawn, with no guarantee the ambassador wouldn't show up unexpectedly early. He let out another sigh and turned to head for the west tower."


• The Mageborn Cynic : Daria & the School of Magic, part 2, by peetz5050 (part 7): "Lady Quinn, wearing a travelling cloak, stepped forward first and dipped her a curtsey. 'Lady Joanna.' She began. 'Forgive me but I must depart. I have a prior invitation to attend dinner at the home of Lady Tio-Fan. I tried to get out of it because I wished to meet you properly and get to know you but you know what Royalty is like, she would not be gainsaid. She orders us around like servants sometimes I don't know who she thinks she is! It's not like she's even a member of our Royal family! But she...' 'Quinn!'"


• Musical Theater, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'So, The Hobbit beat out Django Unchained and Les Miserables!' Daria sat up from her comfy chair in the middle of the commons area. 'Why would you care about that, Quinn?'"


• My New Nemesis, by Brain Camper (part 2): "Jane: Is that makeup or has 'The Infamous Thing' kept you up again? Daria, in a low, tired tone: Yeah, I borrowed makeup from Quinn just so you would ask me that question."


• The Night Helen Saved Christmas, by Aloysius (part 3): "The first children had been bused in, and it wasn't quite what Steve expected. He had braced himself for a bunch of running, screaming kids - a bunch of brats, truthfully - but these kids came in slowly, very few walking under their own power. Several were in wheelchairs, and a couple used walkers. Children using walkers?, he thought. Good Lord, what happened to them?"


• One (More) Little Thing, by peetz5050 (parts 21 and 22): "'Stop feeling so sorry for yourself and get rid of that, we need to talk!' Jake looked at her, then down at his glass, then back at her. 'Slainte!' He said and downed the whiskey. 'There, all gone. What is it now? I paid those bills as we agreed, I haven't forgotten anything.'" (Part 22)


• Operation Glitterberries, by BF110C4 (part 11.2): "The worst part was that, as far as her body was concerned, the exercises he recommended were far more challenging that she expected. She was weak, and that was going to be a problem that she would need to live for a while until she could condition this new body to the old one's standards."


• RA Holiday Special : The Holidays are just Crazy!, by DIsaac (part 8): "JODIE: You two have no morals. ALISON: What are morals? MELODY: I'm a politician. We don't even know what word is. Does it have a creamy center?"


• The Remember That They All Served Affair, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Julia was caught between an abject state of awe and near-total embarrassment as she recognized all three of the men standing with the Legion Advisor – the two speaking to her, from her independent studies work at Quantico during her time as a Cadet Second Class, and the last - from her roommate Sherrie Klein's work, as she built a cornucopia of different tech-devices; lately, for medical purposes..."



• Undying Love part 2, by BrownEyedBagel (part 2): "Mad Dog was enjoying what he was seeing. All he saw was scores of people who were willing to take up arms and use them without regret or remorse in defense of their loved ones. It brought back some fond memories of his time in the military."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Armed Teachers), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Defoe withdrew something from her cabinet and displayed it to the class, some of whom suddenly tensed: an 18th century musket."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Daria slowly started to leave the room with a grim resolve. She looked at Jane and sighed heavily. All the hard work and planning; all the laughter and tears and everything in between ripped apart by one lone incident."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "She smelled what was happening a nano second before her ears registered the sounds. A familiar siren song for anyone that lived among the rock n' roll set."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "As Daria and Tom exited the pharmacy card section, they looked down to notice a magazine strewn upon the floor. As they perused the pictures inside, the subject matter soon became clear."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "She tried moving her arms. With a thud, she hit...something. If some cosmic entity is playing games with me, she thought, he has my sense of humor. But if Dante is to be trusted, they're not tricksters as much as they are incinerators."


• Unnamed story (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by LadieTAG (COMPLETE!): "'Hey Jane - can you hand me that book over there?' Daria asked pointing at the rather large book sitting on her nightstand."


• What's Going On?, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Jane wasn't quite sure at first what the hell was going on, even after she downed three pots of coffee (and leaving the teacher's lounge quite barren of that special liquid) and rubbed her eyes very hard."


• Worldhopper: Ring Shadow, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "He hung up the phone and looked around his command post. 'It's out of our hands, now. If any of you want to pray, this would be a good time.'" (Part 7)

Happy New Year! Yeah.

It's New Year's Eve, which means we're almost at the end of 2012. Time to party hard and make those New Year's Resolutions! Jesse's is probably something along the lines of not getting trapped in beer bottles anymore. Or "cool." Either one.

Fandom News!

• Please be sure to nominate your favorite stories and art for the 2012 Daria Fanworks Awards!


• Reese Kaine muses that we're not alone in Deep Thoughts.


• MartinUK has good news for Douglas Adams fans.


• Share your favorite poetry in a new thread.


• Brain Camper wonders about Iron Chefs in the Easel.

2012 Daria Fanworks Awards Needs You!

The 2012 Booties needs your nominations!   Please help us recognize the best in Daria fan created art and stories, as determined by the fandom.  Nominate early and nominate often - and when the time comes, vote.


Full rules and deadlines are here.

Haven't Had One of These Lately....

Caption this scene in the comments!

The Fruitcake is Making Fruitcake!

Happy National Fruitcake Day! Jake's just about to whip us up a nice batch himself, although I wouldn't recommend trying it. Then again, I wouldn't recommend trying most fruitcakes, period.

Fanfic Update!

• The Double D Dilemma, by Smijey (part 1): "Daria walked up to her locker and opened it. She had told Jane she needed to get a few books from her locker after the self-esteem class, but really she had just wanted a quick few bites of one of the candy bars within before she got home and had a proper post-lunch pre-dinner meal. Just as she reached her hand in, the door of the locker was violently slammed shut, almost catching her fingers. Before she could react, she was shoved forcefully into the locker next to hers."


• I'm Dreaming of a Trite Christmas, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "On the last weekend before Christmas, Helen insisted that the family go out caroling. 'Caroling?' Jake asked doubtfully. 'Caroling,' Helen replied, determination in her voice."


• My New Nemesis, by Brain Camper (COMPLETE!): "[Shot of the inside of the Morgendorffer home at night. All is quiet, serene. Shot to living room: all is quiet. The kitchen: all is quiet. The hallway: after a prolonged silence, the steady whine of an infant is heard. It pierces the night with a shrill, crying scream. Cut to Helen in a nightgown, hair completely frazzled, sleeping a good meter away from Jake. Both groan]"


• The Night Helen Saved Christmas, by Aloysius (part 2): "'Just so you know, this is nothing special, or personal,' the brunette said as her gaze moved back to his face, 'but it has to be done.'"



• RA Holiday Special : The Holidays are just Crazy!, by DIsaac (part 7): "JODIE: Hey, you brought it up. But yes, I'm ready. ALISON: To take out that stick firmly planted up your ass... JODIE: You do know that you totally didn't whisper that. ALISON: Glad you noticed."


• Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Pt.III), by jtranser: "As she watched from concealment, Daria felt her mask of sanity quickly slipping from her frightened face. At that moment, a strong hand gripped her wrist as a familiar voice whispered in her fear: 'And now it begins.'"


• Unnamed story (IC: Daria Muyo!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "The Great Fire of Lawndale had burned down most of the city, leaving the Morgendorffers and the Lanes homeless. Elsie had suggested that the Morgendorffers and the Lanes move into the Sloane Mansion, as a joke. However, Kay Sloane wished to show the Sloane charitable spirit and the Morgendorffers now living with them, along with Jane and her brother Trent."


• Unnamed story (Scream Scenes), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'No.' Jane looked up from her lunch, a bit of which she was still in the process of chewing. 'Hmm?' 'I said no,' Daria repeated with a frown."


• We Are One, by PrecambrianStudios (part 10): "Quinn tapped her foot nervously. The Gupty's were once again completely silent and her pig-tails made her feel silly. She had to do something, this silence was torturous."

Also Known as "X." Short for "X-Mas"?

Merry Christmas! Mrs. Bennett is getting into the spirit in ways we'd probably all rather not think about, and you can celebrate the holiday with this list of Christmas-related Daria fanfic. I'm sure there have been more holiday stories written since last year, though, so feel free to post about them in the comments!

Fandom News!

• Share your wishes for a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.


• Brother Grimace asks what is the gateway discipline of Science?


• RLobinske shares an article about the dating of Christmas.


• Two new Iron Chefs have been posted in the Creative Writing forum: echopapa's Armed Teachers and punkrocktoy's Daria Muyo!

For the Rest of Us!

Happy Festivus! Make sure you celebrate with the traditional aluminum pole--you can borrow Upchuck's. You can also celebrate by reading Gene's "Bettie and Jack at Festivus," a Daria fanfic about Festivus.

Today is also HumanLight, which as far as I know does not require an aluminum pole. To each his own, I guess.

Fanfic Update!

• Daria's World, by baelparagon (prologue): "Years later Daria would never understand why she did what she did. Maybe it was some misplaced sense of loyalty she felt to her two drones; maybe it was to put this arrogant wannabe gangster in his place. Maybe it was for nothing more than her own amusement."


• The Dire Beginning (Iron Chef: Daria vs. the Mayan Apocalypse), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'This is all your fault, you know,' she said, then paused. She wasn't sure if she expected an answer or not. Either way she didn't get one."


• Dylan, by J-D (part 15b): "Looking around to make sure that nobody was watching him, he manoeuvred out of his pocket the container of dye that Rod had given him. He held it close to his chest, studying it for a minute, and then smacked it hard against his collarbone, where it produced a convincing burst of colour. 'Ms LeBeau!' he called out. 'I'm hit!'"



• The End Zone (Iron Chef: Daria vs. the Mayan Apocalypse), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'So, Mack Daddy, are you worried about the world coming to an end tomorrow?' Kevin asked after football practice, a note of concern in his voice. "


• Hot Bunking (Iron Chef: Daria vs. the Mayan Apocalypse), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Wow.' Tiffany Blum-Deckler sipped from her diet soda, as she watched one of the many flatscreen monitors set up around the room. 'That... must... hurt.'"


• I'm Dreaming of a Trite Christmas, by Kristen Bealer (parts 2 and 3): "The following weekend brought Phase One of Operation: Perfect Christmas. That blustery Saturday afternoon, Helen and Jake bundled up the girls and they set out for the mall. Quinn was thrilled. Daria was not." (Part 3)


• The Night Helen Saved Christmas, by Aloysius (part 1): "Steve sat down in the recliner and adjusted himself in the soft, cushioned material. 'Feels good,' he said and pulled up a wired remote control device from his left side. 'Ah, the massage feature. Maybe I need this after all.' Then he pushed the button."


• Now Read This, by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "For once, a change in clothing is actually somewhat satisfying, Daria reflected while doing homework."


• RA Holiday Special : The Holidays are just Crazy!, by DIsaac (part 6): "ALISON: You sure have a lot of excuses to deal with, Miss Landon. JODIE: What are you saying? ALISON: Are you playing deaf, dumb or blind? Or perhaps a combination of the three?"


• ST: A Tale of Temporal Gifting, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "'Yes, I am Captain Mackenzie Calhoun of the USS Excalibur, often representing the United Commonwealth of Planets in Sector 221. But I am sure you don't want to know about that. I am here because you kept demanding an explanation for Excalibur's course change from me. We have changed course because we are intercepting an unknown ship before it can breach the Romulan Neutral Zone, which I am sure you do not want it do!'"


• Tie Yourself to Me, No One Else (IC: Lyrical Endings), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "The first thing Tom noticed when he opened his eyes was that he was completely immobile."



• Tomorrow (IC: Lyrical Endings), by breitasparrow (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane watched as Upchuck approached Brittany in the hallway, immediately after her umpteenth public breakup with Kevin."


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Like a thief in the night or rather like a teenager sneaking in after breaking curfew, Quinn crept into the house."


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Jane observed the carnage with horror and with sick curiosity. Hundreds of bodies laid in the Zon, some twisted into unspeakable positions, others with pleased looks on their faces. I told Trent not to play Wicked Twister again."


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "Daria sighed. 'I guess this is the part where I should put in some effort to uphold my clever facade of actual human feeling and ask what the hell is wrong with him this time. Besides the usual, I mean.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Armed Teachers), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "DeMartino stood up, and sensing he was about to make a speech, the class groaned under their breath."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria vs. the Mayan Apocalypse), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Brittany gently polished a ceremonial dagger as the clock read 11:59. The end was coming and it meant that thousands upon thousands would die horribly."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Daria went to the toilet, and sat on it."


• We Are One, by PrecambrianStudios (part 9): "'If all else fails, we could just slip some painkillers into the milk. Worked with the Duffins.' Quinn's mind floated back to two years prior, recalling two little twin boys that eventually started jumping on the furniture and swinging forks like swords. She and Daria told them that their milk would make them super-strong. The Duffin's never called them again."

Eep!

Hey, everybody! The world ended! What? It didn't? Well, give it a minute. (Waits) Okay, give it a few more minutes. Aaaaany moment, I'm sure.

Or maybe the world decided it would be rude to end on Karen and Derek Adler's anniversary.

Anyway, while we wait for the apocalypse to finally show up, here's the latest in fandom news:

• Share your favorite bits of Christmas humor in a new thread.


• Roentgen asks for some help with a scenario: The Off-Line Week.


• J-D muses about Jake and facial hair.


• MartinUK asks if anybody has seen Meatloaf recently.


• Smijey posted a new Iron Chef in the Creative Writing forum: Daria vs. the Mayan Apocalypse.

Daria? Caroling? What?!

On this day in 1995, Daria appeared on the Beavis and Butt-head Christmas episode "It's a Miserable Life" as part of a fantasy sequence showing what life would be like without Butt-head. As you can see in the screen capture, Daria would be happy and well-adjusted. There could be no scarier outcome as far as I know.

Fanfic Update!

• Dylan, by J-D (part 15a): "'I suppose you're looking forward to having some fun on the field trip demonstrating the truth of that on some of our classmates.' 'Nah. That's not what I call creative. I've got a plan for giving us an excuse to ditch. Are you in?'"


• Everybody Needs a Hobby (Scenes no Daria fic should have: Write The Lightning), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Jane turned to her new friend Daria as the bad movie they were watching went to a commercial break. 'Say, Daria, do you have any hobbies?'"


• Glasses and Lipstick (chapter 2), by oni (part 4): "When Daria came into the restroom, she found Sandi leaning against the far wall. 'What the hell was that out there Sandi,' Daria asked with the same frown on her face. 'Quinn was just concerned.'"


• I'm Dreaming of a Trite Christmas, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "'Is this a trick question?' Jake replied warily. 'Not at all!' she exclaimed, starting to get excited. 'Maybe this year we could stay home and have Christmas with just us and the girls.'"


• I SAT, Looking On, Powerless, As Everything Crumbled, by Brain Camper (COMPLETE!): "Daria with a hint of distress in her voice: Oh god, how long have I.... [She sees her clock] Oh crap! [Daria runs to her closet and starts throwing things out of her closet in search of something. Even Quinn is taken aback]"


• Life is Like T-Rex, by-sam (parts 9 and 10): "I didn't even flinch when a trio of spells blasted me into an easy chair, bound me to it, and gagged me. I also felt an Anti-Apparation ward fall into place over the room. As always, your aunt's spell work was impeccable." (Part 10)


• Nature or Nurture (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Yeah, well you can laugh. The Barksdale genes are going to kick in on our kids and both of us had better watch out!'"


• One (More) Little Thing, by peetz5050 (parts 19 and 20): "Their attention was drawn to the stage. Helen felt her pulse speed up as she saw Daria walk out with a nervous looking Sherman McGrundy in tow. Daria looked over at the sound desk and pointed to one of the standing microphones in front of her. Then she tapped the mike getting a sound on the second hit." (Part 20)



• Revelation (Scenes no Daria fic should have: Write The Lightning), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Jake scrolled through Facebook, skimming over various posts and pictures. He stopped at a photo of two people sitting side by side."


• 'Tis the Season..., by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked up from her keyboard, sensing a presence in the room. The door was still firmly closed and there were bars on the windows so...She swiveled around in her chair and did a double take. An extremely tall man? Woman? Androgynous person with white feathered wings stretching out to touch both walls stood by her bed. S/He also appeared to be glowing slightly."


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Jane wasn't entirely sure what to do. It has been almost an hour since Daria crawled into the cardboard box and she wasn't coming out for anything."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Quinn mused about the situation she woke up in. She was naked in a paddleboat that had obviously been on fire recently and was currently parked on the roof of Stacy's house."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have:Stupid, Silly and Disturbing), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Daria grabbed a massive hatchet and advanced toward Quinn, whose attention was focused on the TV."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have: Write The Lightning), by Brain Camper (COMPLETE!): "[Daria sits in her usual booth in the pizza place. There is a stream of dried blood seeping down her nose. Jane suddenly appears and looks at her friend curiously]"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have: Write The Lightning), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "'Ever wonder what it would be like to reach third base with a married woman?'"


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "'Oh, lay that pistol down, babe.' Tom soothed or tried to as Daria eyed him with murderious intent."


• Worldhopper: Ring Shadow, by RLobinske (part 5): "Eyeing the gate, Richard said, 'I'm too close to quit now.'"

The Cutest Aviator

Happy Wright Brothers Day! On this day in 1903, the Wright brothers made the first successful heavier-than-air flight in Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. Quinn is ready to recreate the famous event, but she's probably insisting on a pink airplane and onboard carrot sticks. Maybe we'll be lucky and she'll just decide to stay up there indefinitely.

Fandom News!

• Temppeli wonders about driving tests around the world.


• Discuss The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey in the Weapons of Mass Distraction forum.


• Dervish has a question about the Sorting Hat in Harry Potter.


• Can you help tagloff locate a story?


• Erin M. invites you to choose your own "Daria & Son" plot!


• PrecambrianStudios wants to know if fandom artists take requests.

Frankly, My Dear, I Don't Give a Dammit!

The movie Gone with the Wind premiered in Atlanta on this day in 1939. Helen and Jake impersonate the lead characters on the right, and I wonder how Daria and Quinn's movie night after "Aunt Nauseam" went. Fanfic potential, perhaps?

Speaking of fanfic, here's the latest update:

• Best Christmas Ever (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'I guess you never had a cool Christmas growing up.' 'Au contraire! We had some great Christmases. Let me tell you about when I was seven....!'"


• Daria the Baller, by Sofa King (part 9): "A quick glance at the Caller ID brightens Helen Morgendorffer's face with a brilliant smile. 'Hello, sweetie!' she says. 'It's been so long since we've talked. How are you?'"


• Dylan, by J-D (part 14): "Dylan shook his head. 'Asking you to enter a poster in the competition is like they're inviting you to prank them. How long has Mr Leroy known you?'"


• Holiday Shore (Scenes no Daria fic should have: Write The Lightning), by breitasparrow (COMPLETE!): "Guy Fawkes Day stumbled into the confession room after a hard night of partying with the other Holidays, knocking over a boom mic and a light fixture on his way to the seat in front of the green screen."


• Namesake (IC: Lyrical Endings), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "He had thought she was the one."


• Not Enough Time (IC: Lyrical Endings), by LadieTAG (COMPLETE!): "Jane Sloane stared down Tom. She had not slept or left his side since she had gotten the call."


• Quinn's Code 07: The Grounded Geek, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "'All rise,' Jake paused whilst everyone rose. 'Please be seated. The court calls the case of the family versus Daria and Quinn Morgendorffer.'"


• Tis the Season to be Jolly (DeMartino and Jake swapped), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "I can tell by the slam of the door that Anthony's drunk. Of course he is. He's been out at a Christmas party thrown by a client and he's never come back anything less than shitfaced yet."


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "This was so not her scene, Daria thought. She sat in the corner of a crowded living room, sippling carefully at a wine cooler while around her, people danced, drank, and passed out."


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "The search has not been going well." (Part 2)


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by LadieTAG (COMPLETE!): "Tom watched as the two rambled down the street. Tom hadn't seen the woman since their senior year in high school - while he had been dating her best friend - the one he cheated on her with."



• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Quinn laid down in the chair in the middle of the small, hot, claustrophobic room, unable to escape or move, her white hands clenching the taut leather."


• Unnamed story (IC: Lyrical Endings), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "'Thanks for helping me out today, Jane.' Daria said as her best friend helped her out of the car and walked her toward the door of the Lenscrafters. Daria took Jane's arm to make sure she didn't bump into anything while she was without her glasses."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fic should have: Write The Lightning), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "The rear end went wide. Tom's jaw flexed, and he found himself grateful that his crew had insisted on his wearing a mouth guard. He was certain that he would've cracked a tooth from how hard he was forcing his teeth together."


• Uranium in the Drinking Water, by BF110C4 (part 2.4): "Kay Sloane first and only living wife of Angier Sloane, Fielding's Steadholder resisted the urge to sight at the antics of the spectacled woman in what was definitely the most austere of the dresses in the entire hall, servants included."

Quinn Only Drinks Fashionable Cocoa, Of Course!

Happy National Cocoa Day! Whether it's cold or warm where you are, today's the day for a nice cup of hot cocoa. Be like that really cute family of teens Quinn saw on TV. You know, the ones who got stranded during a hurricane!

Fandom News!

• MartinUK wished everyone a happy sound engineers day yesterday.


• RLobinske shares an article with thoughts toward a new green movement.


• View the trailer for Pacific Rim and discuss the upcoming movie.


• Which do you think will gross more on Christmas Day, Django Unchained or Les Miserables?


• Two new Iron Chefs have been posted in the Creative Writing forum: Jim North's Lyrical Endings and PrecambrianStudios's I'm concerned about such an important date!