Monday, May 31, 2010

In Their Memory

This Memorial Day, we give thanks for everyone in the U.S. Armed Forces, past and present and future. Mack Mackenzie, as General Patton, gives them our best salute.

NEW! Roentgen has added a new Iron Chef for artists: A Daria Design. How would you have drawn Daria if you were designing the show?

PPMB
  • Finn Morgendorffer 48: Filling Sacks of Failure, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 1): As he finished all the smaller applications, Finn’s eyes came across his favorite picture. It was taken when Finn was only 6, back in Highland. He was sitting on his father’s shoulders, and it was the happiest Finn had ever seen his father. I hope you’re proud, Dad, Finn thought.
  • NEW! Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (Part 2): Clarissa pointed to the table. "I'm just getting my picture taken. Do you want to get something to eat after we get our dorm assignment?" Daria shrugged. "Okay. I heard that the room assignments are just temporary, that they let us pick out where we want to live." Clarissa brightened. "I'd like to live in Owen Hall. It's the oldest dorm on campus and they say it's haunted." Daria gave out a snort, then smiled. "Count me in. Maybe the ghosts can give us pointers on what our professors want in our term papers."

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Daria a Saint? She Ain't.

This is the feast day for Saint Joan of Arc, a teenager who had to go through a terrible lot of trouble just to be made a saint. Daria and Beavis provide a reenactment of Ms. Arc's demise several hundred years ago. A sad story it is.

On the brighter side, this is the 102nd birthday anniversary of Mel Blanc, who was the voice actor for so many Warner Brothers cartoons. You rule, dude.

SPECIAL BULLETIN: We bring you "An Open Letter to Heidi Montag from Quinn Morgendorffer," courtesy of Jezebel.com. Be warned that some of the links on that webpage are NSFW and NSF anything else, but the article was too good to pass up.

PPMB
  • The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): As Daria walked out to the exit porch, she saw the new signs posted on the wall. The Authority had declared a State of Emergency at the Labs, and listed its rights derived therefrom: "The Authority has the right and duty to question and demand answers. It may arrest and detain persons whose behavior gives reasonable grounds for such actions. Such persons are to be detained for a period to be determined by The Authority and may or may not be released at the discretion of The Authority. The Authority may establish cordons and curfews requiring persons to stay indoors and not leave without a required permit issued by The Authority. The Authority expects you to have a good day. And it will be checking to see that you do."
  • Morgendorffer, by Lord Akiyama (Part 1): "Rise and shine, Miss Morgendorffer," the first maid managed to say in a sleepy tone. She rocked the other's shoulder back and forth repeatedly until she finally stirred. "It's another beautiful day for her highness to abuse her social status upon by spending more than her given allowance on clothes and eying pathetic suitors for her to manipulate in the evening." (Daria/Blackadder)
  • Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (Part 1): Daria Morgendorffer took a sip of water from the plastic bottle. It was important to keep oneself hydrated during a flight, she thought. She'd read about all of the things that can go wrong while flying. For instance, Deep Vein Thrombosis.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Syncopation Nation

The Daria Fandom Blog II is reliably informed that today is International Jazz Day (always the Saturday before Memorial Day). Enjoy some mellow tunes as the day goes by. Mack does the alter ego at left for famed jazz trumpeter Dizzy Gillespie. A note on how this holiday came about appears here.

I've noticed that a few more of the older Daria fansites have vanished, for whatever reason. I will work on updating the links at left as soon as I can. If you discover a new Daria fansite or notice that an old one no longer works, let me know in the Comments.

Current Topix

FF.net
  • Brittany Wants Daria, by a440 (Part 2): "What a crazy world," muttered Daria. "Why did I have to be born bi? Why did we ever come to Lawndale? Why do I have those feelings for her? Why did one kiss trigger off a girl crush I haven't felt after so many years?"
  • Hard Choices, by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): I'm going to kill her. I'm not being euphemistic here. I am going to go over there, break into her house, and then I am going to kill Daria Morgendorffer. (SFMB)
PPMB
  • Finn Morgendorffer 47: Hell is Homecoming, by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): On the day of Homecoming, Finn was all ready in his tuxedo at the float. A heat wave was making the formal wear unbearable, but Finn reasoned he could take his jacket off once the parade got started. Stacy had already arrived, and she was positively stunning in a long, champagne-colored dress. She had let her hair down and curled it. The two matched perfectly, it would be a good float. But, before the parade started, Finn needed to check on the football float.

Because It Was There

Fifty-seven years ago, Mount Everest was successfully scaled by a two-man team, Edmund Hilary and Tenzing Norgay. Tiffany does the alter-ego honors for this day. (As always, thanks to Pinhead and UU for the image!) When asked why he climbed Everest, Hilary is said to have replied, "Because it was there."

This day is also a holiday that no longer exists: Oak Apple Day. You are not required to celebrate it, but if you do, it doesn't count.

PPMB
  • The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (Part 31): Daria opened the paper: 87. God. Damn. It. Daria's deadpan curved into a frown. It was another goddamned B-plus, and barely a B-plus at that. Dammit, what the hell do you want from us on these things?
  • John Lane 46: Substitute Plans, by RLobinske (Part 3): Jodie stood at the blackboard and said, "Otherwise, consider me the same as Mr. DeMartino… without the eye problem." Kevin Thompson said, "Cool. Does that mean we can call you Mrs. DeMartino?"

Friday, May 28, 2010

Brittany Gets Ahead

An interesting historical footnote here, included only because it is mentioned on the Sick, Sad Life Planner CD.

Today is the 272nd birthday anniversary of Joseph-Ignace Guillotin, a doctor who is incorrectly believed to have invented the guillotine. Yes, he did write something about making executions less painful and more efficient, and his idea had to do with cutting off heads, but others had invented it before the French set up a committee to design a better one. And yes, Dr. Guillotin was on that committee. The good doctor made a witty but unfortunate comment about the device his committee was working on, and the joke became so popular his name became attached to the device forever after.

On the SSLP CD, Daria has a witty comment of her own about the guillotine. Mr. DeMartino thinks about it when he reads the morning newspaper. And Ms. Li... well, enough said.

New Hope for the Wretched?

Punk rock singer and Mohawk-wearer Wendy O. Williams (of the Plasmatics) was born this day 61 years ago. One of the wildest rock stars of the punk scene, Ms. Williams was also a movie and stage actress, macrobiotic cook, gypsy dancer, animal rehabilitator, and health food activist. (The title for this entry comes from one of the Plasmatics' record albums.)

Why the MTV artists decided to use Sandi Griffin as the model for W.O.W.'s alter ego (at right) is beyond me, but Sandi carries it off rather well, except for wearing her light blue blouse instead of the two strips of electrical tape that Ms. Williams wore on stage. Sandi has her limits, I suppose. Sandi's pose appears to be a modification of Ms. Williams' appearance in a 1982 press photo.

Writer, journalist, and former WW2 commando Ian Fleming was born 102 years ago today. He is best known for creating the action hero James Bond, whom Mack Mackenzie honors in his From Russia with Love jet pack outfit (at left). Lt. Cmdr. Fleming planned and took part in Operation Goldeneye during the war, and the name was later used for one of the more recent Bond films.

The Dionne Quintuplets, the only batch of five identical twin sisters to ever survive to adulthood, appeared on this world 76 years ago today. They had a rather unhappy life, I am sorry to report. They later formed part of the background inspiration for this Daria fanfic.

Finally, we also remember math genius Alan Turing, who submitted a paper for publication 74 years ago that changed the world, as it eventually led to the invention of modern computers. The paper was called "On Computable Numbers, with an Application to the Entscheidungsproblem," and I have no idea what it was about. I don't think even Daria would know. Click the link to read it, and good luck. (Turing and Ian Fleming, by the way, knew each other well. Small planet we have, isn't it?)

BRAKING N0OoZ!
PPMB
  • Finn Morgendorffer 47: Hell is Homecoming, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 6): The day before the Homecoming Parade was the day they announced the Homecoming King and Queen. They did it in homeroom, so, unfortunately, Finn had to stomach it with Timothy O’Neill. The man had always been a bit splotchy-eyed from crying ever since Barch was arrested.
  • General Semantics, Private Angst, by Gwrtheyrn (Part 26): On a squishy carpet in Re'lax, dead Daria sleeps, dreaming....
  • Into the Fray, by Minx (Part 11): “Whoa, easy there, Rambo,” Sam chuckled as he lurched forward from the pressure. “We both know you’re not going to shoot me.” “What makes you so sure?” Trent said through gritted teeth.
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Special: Tokusatsu Team Up! by LSauchelli (continued): Daria and Green carefully eyed the older Daria as they walked to the wish-granting Artifact. Green was doing everything in his power not to try to pummel the Planeswalker. Daria had to keep a constant mental reminder that if he even tried, Urza would probably kill him without breaking a sweat.
  • Robert, by OverlordMikey (preview): "I swear, Robert, mother and father would turn over in their graves if they knew how you let yourself be used by those shameless little hussies from that Fashion Club."
  • Sister, by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): Jane arrived home and noticed Penny getting ready to leave. "Hey, Penny." "In a hurry—got a plane to catch." "Yeah, I just wanted to say..." Jane mumbled the last part. "What?" Penny asked.
  • Tales of the Ringbearers: Bad Apple, by Doggieboy (preview 2): "We've got a problem."
  • Unnamed story (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by Doggieboy (COMPLETE!): "Your money," one of the men said. "We're broke," Daria said, her voice seemingly small. Both pistols aimed at her and one of the gunmen said, "Too bad."
  • Unnamed story (Write-Off Challenge 3, Round 3), by LSauchelli (COMPLETE!): Jane knocked on the door to the red-brick house and was surprised when almost immediately it appeared to open itself. She almost jumped back when a green-faced Quinn Morgendorffer motioned her to come inside.

Thursday, May 27, 2010

A Real Blast from the Past

Forty-eight years ago, about this time, a fire was started in a garbage dump in Centralia, Pennsylvania. The intent was to get rid of some garbage. The fire instead spread to a nearby coal seam, as the dump was located in an abandoned mine pit. The fire continued to burn underground and in time produced sinkhole collapses and poison-gas emissions from cracks in the ground, and the town was almost completely abandoned. It is today one of the most famous modern ghost towns created by technology and not by economic or population changes.

Today is also the 76th birthday of writer Harlan Ellison, whose works have changed the intellectual landscape of the world. Indeed, even Daria fanfiction has been inspired by his works, to include: "Movies and Moonflower" (in which flower-child Helen Barksdale once got stoned with him), "And I Must Scream" (a nightmare future in which only a handful of humanity survives), and "Mad Dog" (in which one of his stories offers a clue about an evil influence). Thank you, Mr. Ellison!

PPMB
  • The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): "Daria, the new Director wants to see you and your staff in his meeting room in fifteen minutes. Lock it all down before you go." "April, does he want us to use Quiet Passage Protocol?" "No. He wants everyone to see you walking down the hall to his office." "That doesn't sound good. Can you tell me anything more?" "You have excellent extrapolation skills. Use them well. Also read your fortune cookie."
  • Finn Morgendorffer 47: Hell Is Homecoming, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 5): According to Daria’s speech at graduation, pizza was the world’s greatest panacea. And Jane knew that was so much the case. The dough, sauce, and cheese said no words to her, but once it was inside her, everything felt so much better. Heh, like Finn, Jane thought. What a crude joke.
  • Judith Strikes!: Opening Gambit, by Erin M. (continued): "I was a sophomore in college when it happened," said Heather. "One second I'm droning on and on about 'Middleton's time-honored tradition of tomfoolery,' the next, I've levitated an idiot frat boy and got guys in uniforms cornering me in my dorm room. They offered to send me to the HIVE, I said yes, and here we are."

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

What If... Sick, Sad World sometimes got it right?

In the movie Men in Black, the agents famously read tabloid newspapers to find out what was really going on in the world. In Daria, Lawndaleans have the Sick, Sad World TV show. What if one or more of the SSW shows was actually correct (most likely by accident), and an extremely oddball thing happened that would soon affect the lives of Daria and Jane?

Think back on some of the SSW bits from various episodes. What if there was such a thing as an enchanted kiss that could go horribly wrong? Or family ghosts who hung around to annoy their descendants? Or canine call girls? (Eww!)

A number of fanfics have sprung from this idea, such as this delightfully infamous example. Many SSW quotes are given at this website (a fanlisting), a good selection to choose from if you decide to write something in this vein. See what madness can be created.

Remember: Trent's urban legend about Metal Mouth was correct! Strange things can and do happen in Lawndale. Perhaps even enchanted kisses gone awry...

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Nerds and Towels Go Together Like Fish and Bicycles

Today is Nerd Pride Day, hooray! And in a closely related development it is also Towel Day. Let your inner nerd and its towel out for a stroll. Be proud of who you are. Then knock it off, it's embarrassing to see you like that. Jeez, what's wrong with you? Daria, below right, shows us the proper use of a towel on Towel Day. Artie at left is the nerd poster child for today.

A list is being prepared of all the fanfics released in the last few days. Check back for details and be patient. (Finally done with PPMB and FF.net!)

More additions have recently been made to Things Students Still Are Not Allowed To Do At Lawndale High. A great thread.

If you want to join the Judith Strikes! shared world proposed by the great Erin Mills (one of two Daria fans who appeared on "Camp Fear" as cartoon characters), he provides more background info on two items all writers need to know: the Locket and the Cloak. Erin has also provided the opening scene for the shared world stories. Go to it!

Recent Iron Chefs
  • Iron Chef by CR85747: Daria meets Daria. Have Daria Morgendorffer meet a fictional or real-world person who also has the same first name of Daria.
  • Iron Chef by OverlordMikey: Genderbent wha!? "I was thinking, there have been a lot of gender bending with Daria characters, but I don't remember ever seeing one where Daria (or another) wakes up as the other gender, much to the shock of those around her/him and themselves. (Normally it seems to be either a dream or a retelling.) How will people cope!? How will they themselves cope!? Will they return to their original gender? Write it and tell me!"
  • Iron Chef by Wouter: Daria's children, your view. How would Daria be as a mother, what would her kids be like?
FF.net (COMPLETE!)
  • The InDark, by Mediancat (Parts 1 and 2): Here I am and am no I. Not quite, thought Daria Faith Morgendorffer, but Delany put it better than she could. 'Course, when he wrote it, he had more experience than Daria did—actual and age-wise. In her case, it's: here I am and am two I's.
PPMB (COMPLETE!)
  • Delivery Day Deferred, by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): "The gas station burst into flames!" Quinn said, waving her arms emphatically. "Gas stations are not supposed to burst into flames!" (Ringbearer/Daylight/Judith Dariaverse crossover)
  • The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): In her office, seated at her desk, Daria read her lecture notes again. It was a moonless night, the wind was out of the North and the Chancellor's dog, tied up in the Quad, was rasping out its weird bark signifying the presence of strangers.
  • Eye of the Beholder, by Yogi, Glittershrooms, OverlordMikey, et al. (Part 3): Angela Li sat over a model of Lawndale. No one knew of her evil plans. "I already have everything complete except for those few in my way. Well, there is one more—" She looked at a model of the Sloane’s. "I need to get control of the Sloane family if my plans are to come together." Of course, that shall be easy.
  • Falling into College: The Clip Show, by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): Holding a copy of Val between finger and thumb as if it were a dead rat, Daria tossed it in the garbage and said, "I guess we couldn't get away without a final set of annoyances. You know, I still wonder if we didn't get some unexpected help. As much as I appreciate it, the idea is still..."
  • Finn Morgendorffer 47: Hell is Homecoming, by HolyGrail2007 (Parts 1 to 4): "If I’m Homecoming King, someone’s going to have to take the quarterback’s spot on the float. And I sure as hell am not going to let it be Kevin.”
  • John Lane 46: Substitute Plans, by RLobinske (Part 2): Mack said, "What are we going to do about teaching? How do we handle the students?" "In your case," John said, "I'd recommend a cattle prod. Watching Boys P.E. is more a matter of making sure that they don't wreck the building than it is of actually trying to teach them anything."
  • Old Kid, New Man, by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): I meet Ted in a nice and quiet vegetarian cafe/restaurant located in San Jose, California, his current living place. He smiles and stands when I approach and I am momentarily taken aback by his changed appearance from the teenager who had appeared in the Daria show to the man before me: Ted is taller and rougher, has grown a disheveled beard and his hair is longer and seems slightly unkempt. He is also wearing a formal business suit. But his handshake is strong and frank, and his smile open and carefree, just like the teenager one can see in the episodes. We sit, me for a coffee and him to have lunch, the only time is has available for this interview.
  • Siblings, by LOTR_Dan (COMPLETE!): "It's my fault they're dead, you know. It's my fault they went out into that storm." [What happened after things went wrong in "Antisocial Climbers."]
  • Tales of the Ringbearers: Bad Apple—The Second Raid, by Doggieboy (Part 1): Electro-Shock looked away, his expression pensive. "If this is a Ringbearer's house," he muttered, "then God help you all when he comes back." He moved towards the front door. "God help me when he comes back." (preview here)
  • Unnamed story (Falling into College: The Clip Show), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Reading the PPMB thread off his laptop computer in the office of the Psych Detective Agency, Gus Burton looked across the room at the sound of Shawn Spencer and the attractive Latina's argument getting louder and louder. "It blew up the Floating Continent in one shot the very first time they used it!" the woman almost shouted, the blueberry cake donut in her tightening fist falling to pieces. "The Argo was built from the remains of a World War II battleship, while that THING is the size of a small moon!"

No Cameras, Please

Just got home from vacation, still pretty bleary and a little brain dead. What's been going on since I was gone... got to have a most excellent Dariacon with Brother Grimace, only a week after having a most excellent one with Richard and Louise Lobinske, so I totally rule. Well, okay, THEY rule, but I get to rule a little bit.

The Midwest Dariacon 2010 is still on! Come and party!

Kara Wild has let us know that Anne D. Bernstein is teaching a class on animation. Whoa, that would be the best class EVER!

J-D asks, how often do certain Daria characters appear in the show? Check out his math and add your own thoughts.

J-D also has a few questions about "Gifted," regarding Ms. Li's behaviors. Post your own views. And he notes that gender-bender fanfics are often seen in the Daria fandom but not often anywhere else. Do you recall gender-flip stories in other fandoms?

Wouter asks, know of any celebrities who have Daria-like traits? If so, post about them.

Dark Kuno opened up a big can of win when he asked other writers about their least favorite part of writing a long serialized story. Got a ton of answers and debate. Good show.

Quiverwing has researched the issue of who on PPMB has the largest amount of no life, based on number of postings. And the winners are...

ART!!!
Moar l8r when my brain works again.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

To Prom or Not to Prom



A couple years ago, TAG located this B&W alter ego of Daria in a prom dress, even though the show never featured a prom-based story.

So, besides her usual refusal to have contact with her fellow Lawndale High students, why else did Daria avoid going to the prom?

Or did she go and swore everyone to secrecy???

Friday, May 21, 2010

Road Warriors

I will be away for a few days (family visit) but will soon return. Look for posts from the other contributors here. And have a great weekend!

Oh, and I added a few new stories to the previous post before I left. Good reading!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Welcome to the DFB2! (a message for the new fans)

From the time MTV announced it was releasing the Daria DVD set, this blog's followers have more than doubled in number, and it has now collected over 165,000 hits. Lots of new fans and former fans were drawn in by the DVD set. You are always welcome here, and the fandom is glad to have you.

It might help to say a few general words about this blog and the Daria fandom's other party places on the Internet.

This blog was set up about 2.5 years ago, long before anyone know of the DVD release, as a multipurpose watering hole for this fandom. (Yes, there was a DFB before this one, but is is now inactive.) The giant links directory at left was put together to help people find the current hot spots as well as get nostalgic over the long-ago sites of glory. A lot of the Daria art here was recovered from long-extinct MTV and fan sites using the WayBack Machine, which is why it looks official (it was, at one time) but possibly unfamiliar. The sounds bites that play when you click on certain images came from the Daria's Sick, Sad Life Planner CD and various WAV collections online. And my colleagues and I add little notes about famous (or stupid) things that happened each day, usually related to Daria or just quirky enough that Daria would have liked them seeing them on Sick, Sad World. This blog thus imitates the SSLP, which also announced interesting anniversaries and holidays.

The main day-to-day function of the DFB2 is to list newly completed Daria fanfiction, as much of it as can be found. I might have missed a few recent stories, sorry, but am fixing that. If you know of a website where new Daria fanfiction is appearing, let me know.

EXTRA NOTE: I also frequently update and correct postings in the blog, so check back in every so often to see what's new, especially looking for NEW! tags.

And you can comment on anything Daria-ish here using the Comments section below each post. Try to stay current, because not many people will backtrack to read it.

The main message board for actual written conversation is at the PPMB (see links at left). Going off topic at least once in every thread is a requirement.

Any questions or comments are welcome. Glad to have more fans here! Now let's see if that Mystic Spiral TV series can get going...

FF.net
  • Secret Plans and Clever Tricks, by Fringeperson (COMPLETE!): Every Saturday that Quinn had a date, Daria slipped into the overly pink and frilly room, tip-toed her way to the closet, and removed something. It didn't matter much what, but she carefully picked things that she was certain Quinn wouldn't miss – that is to say, things she had bought long enough ago she had probably forgotten about them. This item she then carefully photographed and folded, then put up for sale over the internet. As a small support for her father, she carefully divided the money from the sales and deposited a third into his bank account. Admittedly, Quinn would probably just spend it before their father even noticed the money had gone in, but Daria figured that if it spared her another trip into some national park where they would try to be one with nature, and just end up high on berries, then it was worth it.
  • Technicolor Dream, by Miss Pennyfeather (Part 2): Trent sank his head under the pillow and stopped thinking. Soon he'd be in dream land and he'd forget everything about this unannounced interruption into his otherwise peaceful, uneventful life. He wasn't sure whether he had locked the front door, but he didn't care. He was going to fall asleep. But one eye remained open, one eye refused to close. He was staring at the darkness around him and he was thinking. Was it the music that was getting to him? Was it the gig? Was it the fact that he couldn't remember his mom's face? Was it the annoying mail box in front of their house? The name "Mystic Spiral" made him depressed too, but it had never caused personality deviations before.
  • That's What You'll Take to the Grave, by Mediancat (COMPLETE!): After two rings, the person on the other end picked up. "Hello?" "G, it's Daria. I got a favor to ask." "Certainly. How can I be of assistance?" "Tell me what you know about todhunter demons." (Daria/Buffy the Vampire Slayer) [Story completes saga begun here and continued here.]
  • While the Bat's Away: The Substitute, by Echopapa (continued): After Principal Li gave Ms. Dahl directions to her classroom, she closed the door behind her and went over to the picture window overlooking the Lawndale High campus. True, she could see more by studying the security monitors, but sometimes there was nothing like surveying things one's own eyes to give one a feeling of power. Another crisis averted, she thought. My efforts to keep Laaawndale High running smoothly never end... "Eh?" Her reverie was interrupted by the beeping of her phone. (Daria/DC Justice League)
PPMB
  • The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): The magazine was one of Daria's guilty little secrets, one she indulged in only when at conferences out of town, away from anyone she knew. She'd go to the local book/magazine store, pick up a copy, pay for it, have it sacked and then take it directly to her car. Later, in her hotel room, she'd fix a mojito, turn on her mp3 player loaded with Martin Denny tracks, stretch out and read the latest issue of Modern Popular Culture Magazine. Within were such articles as: "Desperate Suburban Homemakers and Desensitized Robots equal Disappointed Love!", "Astral Freakout", "Repressed Hostility and Guilt: Your House Plants Know!"
  • NEWER! The Ephemeral Ties that Bind, by Thecoffeeguru (continued): "Well, let me introduce myself. My name is Mrs. Manson and I am the student psychologist at Lawndale High. It is my job to..." "What kind of school employs a psychologist? Shouldn't you be an ex-hippie with a made-up certificate in motivational counseling?"
  • LAST NEWEST! Eye of the Beholder, by GlitterShrooms (Part 2): After a brief phone call, Helen stood up in her office. She looked around with a smile. It was that time of week. Walking around, Helen closed her office’s blinds, and dimmed the lights. It wouldn’t be too long before she heard that sacred knock. Knock. Knock. “You can come in,” Helen said. Sandi Griffin entered the room wearing her French maid costume.
  • MOAR NEWEST! Falling into College: The Clip Show, by RLobinske (Part 10): Seated at her computer desk, Daria looked over her shoulder and sighed. "You know, after all this time, I should be used to the weird feeling that someone is about to do something very strange to me. Alien adoptions, supernovas, long-term amnesia. You name it, someone's done it to me. That's why I subscribe to Angst Guard. So that no matter what is done to me, I can bounce back in the next story as good as new."
  • Finn Morgendorffer 46: Shields Up, by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): It did not take long for rumors to spread at the school. After all, Barch was unexpectedly gone. While the males of the school may have been grateful for it, they were also curious. After all, if something could be done to get rid of Barch just like that, anyone would want that sort of power. Finn wasn’t sure if he should tell the truth. Stories got distorted very easily...
  • The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (Part 30): The students in Goodlet's class still segregated themselves. There were the "brains," who were a small group to themselves. There were the "average" and there were the "low" —Quinn's natural group, consisting of herself, Patty Clark, and a girl named Madeline de la Rosa. Each group approached the material at a different level; Quinn, Patty and Madeline approached at "survival." Even so, Quinn found herself listening in to the other two groups. And, amazingly, Quinn could actually understand what they were talking about. The really smart kids were riffing on the material, their questions half-reinforcement and half "can you top this?" as if they were trying to give each other an impossible exam that would be even worse than Goodlett's. (FF.net)
  • Into the Fray, by Minx (Part 10): "From what we’ve been told, they use the women and children as bait and bargaining chips to get the men that are fit enough to fight to cooperate.” Trent paused and looked at the three girls. “Which is why we need to be careful. For all we know this guy is using you three as bait and fooling you into thinking he is a good guy, to lure us out of hiding.” “Why would they go to all of that trouble? It sounds like a waste of time; this isn’t one of those cop drama movies or whatever,” Quinn said. “Really? ‘Cause last I checked we were running around in a would-be war zone. Didn’t it cross your minds that this Sam guy is playing the good cop role, promising to bring back news on your folks so that we would welcome him back, only to realize that it was an ambush?”
  • LAST NEWEST! John Lane 46: Substitute Plans, by RLobinske (Part 1): Ms. Ruiz paced back in forth in Principal Li's office beside Ms. Barch and Mr. DeMartino. "Might I remind you that was part of what made me agree to hire on to your school?" Ms. Barch cut to the subject at hand. "Do we get our raise or not?!" Ms. Li calmly said, "Better! A new coffee maker in the teachers' lounge."
  • NEWEST! Judith Strikes! Opening Gambit, by Erin M. (Part 1): It was a dead world, and had been for some time. Civilization had its time and had moved on, quietly and with little fanfare. There were still some traces though. A few buildings still stood relatively undamaged and were still structurally sound. One of these was a large, red brick, two story house on a quiet suburban street. While a majority of the windows were shattered and blown out, the rest of the house was still intact. The lawn was yellowed and dead. If anyone was still around to look in the garage, they would have found an old red SUV sitting in there, also long dead form disuse. The interior of the house wasn't much better. The elements had taken over in the years since the end and the furniture was rotted and unusable in most of the house. In the living room were the remains of six human skeletons, all jumbled together in a pile in the center of the room. They, too, hadn't been disturbed in years.
  • NEWER! A New Set of Rules, by Dennis (Part 12): The next two days were only slightly more productive than her library foray, so Daria was in what could charitably be called a foul mood when the wall buzzer heralded Kevin's arrival for his study session. She expressed her irritation by greeting him over the intercom with a hearty, “What the hell are you bothering me for?” His puzzled response, “Uh, to meet your for our tutoring session?” did nothing to reduce her annoyance, but rather than unleash a blistering string of profanities, she turned around and stalked from her room without further speech. On her arrival at the check-in desk, Kevin gave her an attempt at a mollifying smile, but she chose not to accept it. Without even looking at him, she signed him in and turned back to the hallway with a grumbled, “Come on, dumbass.”
  • Shining Star: Temporal Conundrum, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): Ringbearer Jane led the others to the Gateway CafĆ© just off the main plaza of Terra Beacon One. "Now everybody, just have a seat and order what you want, on me." Daria said, "Where are you going?" "I've got to go explain to the Ringmasters why I've brought four unauthorized persons and a car here. I'm sure that they've noticed by now and… they'll have questions." "Blame it on me," Daria said. "Oh, I will," Jane said. (FF.net)
  • NEW! A Sick Sad Interview, by Abe (COMPLETE!): How did I get myself into this situation, anyway? Oh yes, of course: Jane. "Hey, they've got positions available for a junior reporter/interviewer and an assistant animator/graphics artist! With any luck, we can work there together!" and "Come on, it's Sick, Sad World!" So we get hired, and they stick Jane in a cubicle in an office building, doing stuff only very distantly related to her art, and send me all the way out to this one-horse town to interview some nut-case.
  • LAST NEWEST! Tracksuits, by Malakite (Part 7): Quinn made her way back to the STET's main hallways, then stepped past the dozens of people who had received the glorious gift of early Renewal. Most of the recoverable wounded had already been removed for processing, along with the obsolete. After a few minutes of growing irritation at getting yet more blood on her boots, she found the man she was looking for, "supervising" a clean-up crew. With her friendliest voice she called to him. "Hello, Preacher." "Ah, good day Agent." He paused, then with his gaze sweeping over the bloodied piles, added, "or perhaps not so good."
  • NEW! Unnamed alternate ending (Finn Morgendorffer 46: Shields Up), by Brother Grimace and TAG, continuing a story by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): Twenty years later, Finn woke up in his bed to find a frazzle-haired figure beside him, holding a two-handed axe high over her head, The mad figure looked down in triumph. "Never make an enemy you can't kill," hissed Angela Li.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Lights Out

A mere 230 years ago today, many colonial Americans in New England became convinced that Judgment Day was at hand. They had good reason for thinking so, as the light literally went out of the day. As much of New England settled into an unexpected twilight, panic set in. The event became known as New England's Dark Day of 1780. Click the link to find out what the cause was. Interesting science footnote. Daria at right provides a reenactment. (Okay, that's actually from "The Teachings of Don Jake," but what the heck.)

Veteran fanfic writer Erin M. has a New Shared World Proposal: Judith Strikes! One Daria in the multiverse has gone rotten to the core. What can be done about her? You can help... by writing the story!

NEW NEWZ: Glenn Eichler has another animated show in development. Read more here!

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  • Falling into College: The Clip Show, by RLobinske (Part 9): Holding a box, Jane stood next to an easel and yelled, "Not just no, hell no! I'm not going to do it. No freakin' way!" With a shake of her head, Jane slung the box and stormed off the set. The box bounced off a sound stand and came to rest face up, so that "Jane Lane Paint-By-Numbers Set" could be clearly seen. From somewhere else on the sound stage, a voice said, "Okay, we scrap that one."
  • Finn Morgendorffer 46: Shields Up, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 7): “I’m here because of one of your teachers, Janet Barch, my son’s biology teacher.” “Ah, yes. Truly a remarkable woman.” “What’s remarkable is the fact that she’s even allowed to teach here. She flunked my boy yesterday for no reason.” “As I understand it, your son did not do his project. That’s grounds for failure, and unacceptable at Lawndale High.”
  • Kismet, by Sara Winters (COMPLETE!): This was a bad idea. The minute Daria saw Trent in her bedroom doorway, she knew that. And yet, she couldn't say anything when he invited himself inside to wait for Jane. Still, there was no excuse for the ribald thoughts that flew through her mind when he lay on her bed and smiled over at her. Trent remarked on her mattress as he placed his hands behind his head and crossed his legs. Daria had pictured getting Trent into her room alone before, but hadn't given any real thought on where to go from there—mostly because the idea itself was as improbable as Brittany being accepted into Mensa. (AoOO) (FF.net)
  • Parents Are People, by Legendeld (Part 6): Daria waited until the first movie was starting before she turned to Quinn and asked, "How long have you been calling Amy Mom?" Quinn looked at her more than a little confused. Jane answered. "A few days at least. They've been getting along really well." "Really?" Quinn looked a little surprised. "I didn't realize I was doing it." "There isn't anything wrong with it," Jane said firmly. "Amy is being a pretty good mom to you two." "I guess." Daria said and she snorted before speaking. "Hell, I thought I would be the favorite with Amy."
  • Tales of the Ringbearers: I Hate the Desert, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "You seem to have the habit of—attracting attention. It seems that everywhere you go, you happen to find the worst possible kind of trouble. Courtney, you’ve run into Zombie Legionnaires three times!"

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

The Museum's Muse

Hi-yo! It is International Museum Day, and we remember Daria's favorite museum at right. International Museum Day. Why not, sure.

A major canon character from Daria died in an alternate universe, 25 years ago today. Who was it?

An original supervillain battling the Legion of Lawndale Heroes appeared in the LLH universe five years ago today. Who was it?

The DVD set continues to sell hugely. Congratulations to everyone who bought a copy!

Monday, May 17, 2010

Now Hear This!

Today is all sorts of days: International Day Against Homophobia (IDAHO for short), World Information Society Day, and the 56th anniversary of Brown v. Board of Education. It is also the 71st birthday of Gary Paulsen, an award-winning author of books for young adults (and older adults, too). I met him a few times and love his work. An excellent guy.

Most importantly, today is Monday. Don't forget it.

And we have some EXCELLENT fanfic for today!

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  • The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): It was very dark in the car. For the sake of her remaining sanity, Daria refused to look at whatever was in the passenger seat. Unfortunately, she couldn't shut off her hearing as the slobbering breathing sounds were clearly audible and accelerating their frequency as the indefinable mass began moving toward her like some sort of vile animated gelatin.
  • Finn Morgendorffer 46: Shields Up, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 5): “Well... well thanks.” Finn smiled. “It was actually really nice to meet you.” Finn stood up, and shook Teresa’s hand, then Bruce’s hand. The husband and wife stood up, paid for their coffees, and left in their car. For a second, Finn sat there, unsure of what to make of everything. The recruiters didn’t actually make him an offer yet, they just expressed their interest. They could turn him down... but still, Shields University. Finn already knew it was a fantastic football school, but according to Teresa it took the upper echelon of grades from high school. Grades that Finn now had. And there was prestige.
  • The Game Called Life, by Trscroggs (continued): “One again,” Daria said, “I am reminded that I need to be more specific with requests.” “You asked for a ‘simple life’ this time,” the old man replied. “What could be simpler than a pastoral farming village?”
  • General Semantics, Private Angst, by Gwrtheyrn (Part 25): Dr. Sloane chuckled as they turned to go. "I've been so stupid, all these years. Now that I've seen you in action, it's obvious why the AIs like you. I shall follow your example henceforth, O sensei!" "Happy to have been of service, I guess," said Daria, dubiously. It seemed to her to be nothing but a little ordinary courtesy, which AIs, unlike humans, usually deserved.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Where There's Smoke, There's [cough cough cough]

A mere 22 years ago today, the Surgeon General of the United States declared nicotine was as addictive as heroin. Since then, it has been discovered that tobacco companies have been deliberately increasing the amount of nicotine going into their product.

What would life be like if we lived in a narco-democracy? That's a society in which all voters are addicted to a substance provided to them by the government or a government backer, which is guaranteed to always win elections and have public support (or acquiescence) because no addicted person will vote against them. Good thought for a speculative Daria fanfic, maybe?

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  • Daria's Escape, by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): The dark-haired man smiled at her and said, “We don’t have much time, Daria, but do you trust me?” She decided to be honest with him. “About as much as I trust any government official.” He shook his head slightly and looked at her for several seconds. “You’re going to have to trust me—fully—for the next several minutes if the two of us are going to get out of this alive.” (Daria/The Wild, Wild West)
  • Daria: Tom Was There, by OverlordMikey (Part 1): Tom noticed a red-and-black flash from the corner of his eye and stopped the Pinto. Looking out his window, he saw Jane Lane on the sidewalk. He waved and she noticed him, then came over to the car window. "Hey, amigo," she said with a grin. She noticed Elsie in the other seat. Elsie was looking away from her. "And howdy, Elsie." Elsie turned and glared at her. "Still angry, huh?" asked Jane. "Hey, it was an accident. How was I supposed to know your mother would take me seriously, let alone actually try square-dancing." "I had to spend my weekend with mother... square dancing. As far as I am concerned—" Elsie turned her head away "—you're dead, Lane."
  • Finn Morgendorffer 46: Shields Up,by HolyGrail2007 (Part 4): “I’m here to teach, not bring in funds. If I see Finn fail, he will fail.” “And if he doesn’t fail?” “That’s my decision.” Janet replied. “I appreciate the concern, Angela, but I’m sure that certain... events... from two years ago would agree with me. That fiasco with the damn Ultra-Cola was bad enough. I’m sure Superintendent Cartwright would love to know why you kept calling that soccer player to your office.” Janet smiled evilly.
  • The Hallowed Halls of Fielding, by Roentgen (Part 28): The seniors, having stopped their swims, shouted out encouragement. "Come on, DeeDee!" DeeDee? thought Daria. DeeDee? Not this again! "You can do it, DeeDee! Just concentrate!"

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Off Today

Having a little Dariacon (aren't they all?) at Wonderfest today. Will return later. Enjoy your day!

And talk amongst yourselves. Think of a topic.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Indiana Trent and the Band That's Thinking About Changing Its Name

Sixty-six years ago today, film writer-producer-director George Lucas was born. Thanks to him, we have more Daria/Star Wars crossovers than you can shake a lightsaber at. I think we can stop with the crossovers, there are enough now, please. We don't have enough Daria/Indiana Jones crossovers, however. My favorite IJ quote? It's from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade: "We do not follow maps to buried treasure, and X never, ever marks the spot."

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  • Apocalyptic Daria: Scarlett's Tale, by Doggieboy (Part 18.5): All three walked together through the field and remained side by side. Neither human said anything, and Scarlett couldn’t detect any discernible thoughts from the cat. Suddenly the field gave way to a city street and the three stopped. The homes around them appeared abandoned and damaged. Most of the cars that were appeared damaged and covered with a film of dust. The girl looked at one house and her mouth dropped open as she recognized the home of her friend, Kristy Barton. We’re in Lawndale... but why?
  • Daria: Hunter 6—Infectious, by Jim North (continued): "My specialties are biology and nanotechnology." Ted reached into a pocket on his lab coat and pulled out a packaged pair of sterilized gloves, tore the plastic seal, and put them on. "Speaking of which, I heard that one of you has gotten a nasty little bite from our ambulatory deceased!"
  • NEWER! Eye of the Beholder, by Yogi (Part 1): “This,” said Helen Morgendorffer, putting a sheet of paper full of neatly formatted text down on the table “Is an example of an ideal resume for college and scholarship admissions.” Daria resisted the urge to yawn, knowing it would only make things worse. She did not want to spend Saturday morning like this. Granted, she didn’t really have anything planned for this weekend, or for any weekend for that matter, but listening to her mother lecture her on her lack of activities was getting rather old. “And THIS,” Helen continued, putting a sheet of paper with much less text beside the first “Is YOUR resume."
  • Finn Morgendorffer 46: Shields Up, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 3): “For this next project,” Janet noted, “you’ll be working in pairs.” Janet had thought of a number of things to say to this recruiter woman that Skinny mentioned was interested in Finn, that useless male. He did not deserve to have such people interested in him. The XY was proof enough of that. But, as she was thinking up the things, she realized she had no idea who this recruiter was... So her approach needed to be different, and that’s when she settled for the one weapon a teacher had: grades.
  • From the Darkness: A Young Artist's Dream, by Civanfan (COMPLETE!): My first impression of Lawndale was a fine image of picture-perfect suburbia. Boring. I was supposed to meet up with whats-her-face at Pizza Prince at noon, but apparently she wasn't under the same impression. I was considering whipping out my knife and carving a Paul Klee imitation into the table, when I heard a voice call me by name. She, an attractive woman of about twenty-seven, had finally showed up twenty minutes late in worn blue jeans, a plaid shirt, and a smock with wet clay all over it. Her hair was in a polka-dot kerchief, and from the look on her face, I knew the first words out of her mouth would be an apology. "I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry!" She covered my hand in clay when she shook it. "I was working on a piece for a charity auction, and I suddenly remembered this interview." I shrugged. That's art, I said.
  • The Game Called Life, by Trscroggs (continued): "What the hell happened anyway?” “Somebody made a wish,” the Old Man said, “on a greater artifact, while standing at a reality fulcrum, during a celestial alignment.”
  • NEW! A New Set of Rules, by Dennis (Part 11): “So, what's Kevin's number?” Daria had tried to make it a joke, but her voice took on a nasty edge. Colleen's smile didn't change, but the tone of the conversation somehow did. “Careful, Daria. If you ask that question again, I just might answer it. And I'm not sure either of us could handle that.”
  • Unnamed story (More Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): Daria sighed deeply as she leafed through the paper. "Cheer up, amiga," Jane said. "It's just one summer of slave labor, and then you're back to the old college grind, right?"
  • Unnamed story (More Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by Disco316 (COMPLETE!): "You know, there's one thing about this satellite that worries me."

Thursday, May 13, 2010

When the Bottom Fell Out of the Unicorn Market

Today is the birthday anniversary of Ole Worm. (That was his real name, pronounced OH-leh VORM, but he also liked to be called Olaus Wormius.) He was a Danish physician, teacher, and perpetual college student who like to collect ancient Scandinavian books. An amateur scientist as well, Dr. Worm is best known (some might say infamous) for proving in 1638 that unicorns did not exist. Until that time scholars could always point to one sort of physical evidence "proving" the existence of unicorns: their whorled horns. Then Dr. Worm showed that these horns actually came from narwhals. That, alas, was the end of the unicorn. (Not that unicorns didn't have problems of their own.) The image at left is of course from the "Charlie the Unicorn" web cartoon.

Today is also the birthday of author Armistead Maupin, who is 66. He is the celebrated author of the Tales of the City novel series that I read years ago on the advice of an excellent friend, and this in turn laid the groundwork for the Pause in the Air series. More about this influence may be read here.

Is Daria returning to The-N? Or something similar? Read and learn.

And here is an image sure to blow your mind, from the legendary S.C. Thank you, man!

NEW GNUZ! Sick, Sad World (the Daria website) has been updating continuously for months, and just did it again! Check it out!

FF.net
Most stories added to FF.net of late have appeared elsewhere, except for one.
  • NEWEST! The Fate of the Duels, by a440 (COMPLETE!): Brittany, in her black blouse and bow, along with her black skirt, arrived at that spot ahead of Kevin, her katana swords in their scabbards, strapped to her waist, the blonde waiting for her adversary, having spent last night in Florida, in what she thought was a clean motel...
Outpost Daria
  • NEWEST! A Stranger in Lawndale, by Belle Book (Part 5): Stacy was stunned by what Derek just told her. When he first talked about Shintoism, kami, and kitsune she thought he was just speaking of fascinating fables that had no real connection to her. Until he told her that he was a kitsune. Now she didn't know what to believe.

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  • NEWER! Daria: Hunter 6—Infectious, by Jim North (continued): "Miss Lane, please lower your weapons and step away from Miss Morgendorffer," the male agent said levelly. "You don't fully understand what's going on here." "No, I do fully understand what's going on here," Jane shot back. "I understand that for all you know, she just burned her hand with some coffee before we ever even got here, Agent Jumptoconclusions!"
  • Daria's New Necklace, by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "It's called a behelit. Also known as the Egg of the King. Whoever possesses it is destined to obtain the world in exchange for their own flesh and blood." (Daria/Berserk)
  • NEWER! The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): Unnerved, Daria drove out of Godfrey to a crossroads. Stopping, she looked at the signboards to see if she could find her way home. Each road seemed to intersect each other in a peculiar topological fashion, so that all the roads that were, are and will be pass through the crossroads and frequently exchange destinations. And this is how one gets lost, she thought.
  • Finn Morgendorffer 46: Shields Up, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 2): “Hello, Janet, how was your day?” Timothy asked in that sappy way of his. “Awful," said Janet. "Those new freshman males make we want to vomit. Think they’re so great. Sure, they think they’re flying now, then they’ll run out after 20 years of...” “Oh, Janet, it’s okay. Let out your anger.” “Sometimes I think we should just graduate them now and ship `em off to the next great war or something.”
  • NEWER! The Game Called Life, by Trscroggs (continued): Daria had a very firm glare in place the next time the desk appeared. “That was a dirty trick,” Daria growled while attempting to set the desk on fire with her eyes. “You signed off on it,” the Old Man replied. “While I was ranting to myself, it doesn’t count!” Daria protested.
  • NEW! Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria's children, your view), by Ranger Thorne (COMPLETE!): "I saw two generations of Barksdale/Morgendorffer dysfunction in person," Daria said as she looked out of the screen. "A little digging and I found out that it had been going on with both families for a lot longer than that."

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

The Nurse Is In

Today is International Nurses Day to commemorate the birth of Florence Nightingale, the famous English nurse who cared for soldiers in the Crimean War, fought on the distant planet Crimea. (CORRECTION: I earlier wrote here that FN was an American and cared for soldiers during the Civil War. This was not so much an error as a failure on my part to point out that Ms. Nightingale was also a sidekick of Doctor Who and was able to time travel to the American Civil War after she returned from the planet Crimea. I trust this is clear to everyone now.)

Lawndale High has a school nurse, but she is never seen, even when Daria goes to visit her in "Ill." We do get to see Nurse Chase's door, so we will use that here.

GNUZ!
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  • Before the Deprogramming, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "I'll figure out a way to pay everyone back," Jane promised, "but I think I want to quit the scouts. I...I'm really sorry," she finished. The troop leader looked at Jane sadly. "I wish you'd reconsider," she said. "I know you've had a rough start, but I'd like to think you got something out of your time here." "Well, I got a humongous debt that will probably take years to repay. Does that count?" (FF.net) (OD)
  • Daria: Hunter 6—Infectious, by Jim North (continued): The shooting ceased, then a figure slowly emerged from around the corner and started checking the corpses over. There was a momentary movement from the floor, then another burst of laser bolts tore one of the ghoul's head to pieces and put it down for good. Satisfied with its work, the figure stood up and moved away from the bodies, heading straight for where the women were standing. At first, Daria thought it might just be a trick of the night vision, but as the thing approached, she could clearly see that it was a robotic drone of some type, but not like any she had ever seen before. Even the heavily modified Vexxers the Landons had been building had been normal in comparison.
  • Falling into College: The Clip Show, by RLobinske (Part 8): Jake sat on one of the sofas in the living room, flipping through a white-covered photo album. "I'll let you in on a little secret. Despite her cool outer appearance, my little Daria likes to be the drama queen on occasion. When she does, you can be sure it's something special."
  • Finn Morgendorffer 46: Shields Up, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 1): “Kevin! What are you doing here?” Finn asked once he hurried his way over. “Trying out,” Kevin replied. “Why are you trying out? You were a senior last year. That means you don’t go to high school anymore... wait, did you flunk?” “Hey, shut up!” Kevin remarked. Finn, however, erupted into laughter. “I don’t know what’s more shocking. The fact that you’re a five-year, or that I didn’t guess this would happen.” “Hey, it’s all Barch’s fault!"
  • It's All Virtual, by Yogi (COMPLETE!): It all started with a computer repair bill. Three HUNDRED Dollars. To a college student, this was a fatal blow to any budget, and yet she needed a computer to get any work done. After swallowing her pride and asking her parents for a small loan, Daria decided to take a basic computers class just so she could fix the damn thing when it broke the next time, or at least tell if she’s being ripped off. One class became two, two became six, six became a minor, then...
  • Jacob Morgendorffer, Esq., by CAP (Part 9): “Okay, Daddy,” Helen laughed into the telephone. “Oh, here’s Jake now if you want to talk to him. Okay, I love you, too.” “It’s Daddy,” Helen said extending the telephone to Jake as she stood. Jake nodded wearily then pecked her on the cheek before taking the telephone. With an inaudible sigh, he sat down in the overstuffed chair that his wife vacated. “Hi, Dad,” he said. “How are you?”
  • NEW! The Mack of Mack, by Ticknart (COMPLETE!): Michael Jordan MacKenzie, better known as "Mack" to fans of MTV's reality series Daria just released on DVD, sits at a table just inside Pittsburgh's The Tin Front Cafe. He gets up and waves me over as I scan the room for him, before I even had the chance to take in the charming ambiance. "You're not late," he apologizes. "I was early. I'm always early. I charge clients by the hour, so I want to make sure that they have plenty of time, if they want it. Plus," he smiles, "it's always nice to be out of the office just a little longer."
  • Shining Star: Temporal Conundrum, by RLobinske (Part 11): "Ahhh!" Jane said as she reappeared in to the courtyard of Terra Beacon One. "What the hell just happened?" Daria said, "Your counterpart transported us to a planet in another universe." "Daria," Jane said. "There's no way you can afford this. You must've drugged me."
  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Mother's Day Cards), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): [Won't give this one away!]
  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Mother's Day Cards), by x (COMPLETE!): [Janet: too short to sample!]
  • Unnamed story (More Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by Roxanne M (COMPLETE!): "Helen, I have a new client! Some guy named Red Geen called and wants me to help him market his Duct Tape/Handymans Museum." (Daria/Red Green)
  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Ouch Time), by Minx (COMPLETE!): He was torturing himself, thinking only of the good times they shared. It shredded him inside, but that was good he wanted, needed to feel bad it was the only thing keeping him sane. Sure there had been bad times, that was why she had left him for another man, someone he had regarded as his friend.
  • NEWER! Unnamed story (More Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by Ranger Thorne (COMPLETE!): "Well Daria," Red said as they stood outside the lodge, "I'm sorry about it taking so long to get your boyfriend's car fixed." "Trent is not my boyfriend," Daria reminded him again. (Daria/Red Green)