Down with All Hands

"Just Add Water" celebrates its 11th birthday today, having premiered on MTV that long ago. Much has been said here about that episode, so it will not be repeated. The unaired pilot episode of Daria, "Sealed with a Kick," is 15 years old, and fanfic character and Daria love Michael Fulton is 29. I forgot where I discovered that last bit of info, maybe someone can tell me the story in which that date appears.

I took yesterday off, so sue me.

NEWZZZ!!

• Charles RB asks, is it better or worse for Erin and Brian to have stayed married?

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• Anticipation, by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "Six days until graduation and I will NEVER have to step inside Lawndale High again!" "I know. And then, come September, the Big City, the Bright Lights, the separate boyfriends!" "I hate you. Sheesh, you steal one boyfriend, and they never let you forget it." "What are friends for? Hey, what's with the waterworks, amiga? You OK?" "Yeah. Just a bit emotional since the other day. Had a session with the therapist and it went places I didn't expect. I've been thinking a lot lately about what it means to have a friend like you."

• The Camera I, by Brian Taylor (Part 1): The lens cap is removed. The camera begins recording an image of a dining room table after a party. Covered in shreds of wrapping paper. Paper plates. Plastic forks. A half-eaten chocolate cake. It pans up to reveal a weary housewife bent over the table, shoveling wrapping paper into a trash bag. She has dark hair and ruddy coloring, and she looks to be in her forties. "Stately Barksdale Manor," intones Amy dramatically on the narration. "Where even as we speak, Edie Barksdale, put-upon housewife by day and crimefighting dynamo by night, is preparing to do battle with her trickiest opponent yet—Wraps McGee, the sinister shrinkage king of suburban Virginia!"
• The Dam Bursts, by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "So, wanna come in?" "No, not today. I'm kind of bushed. I need a nap." "OK, call me later if you want. 'Bye!' "'Bye!" She discovered several thick envelopes in the mailbox, all addressed to her, from several of the colleges she'd applied to. Including Bromwell. Collecting her mail and leaving the rest in the box, she went in and up to her room. She stared at the acceptance letter from Bromwell. She smiled to herself in satisfaction.
• Daria/Dorian 6: Christmas Chaos, by LadieT (Part 6): "Jane, you broke up with your boyfriend and ended up on crutches thanks to me." "True, but I got a better boyfriend out of the deal." Jane kissed Dorian's cheek. "As for the crutches, blame the three doofuses for that. Besides, if I wasn't hurt, I wouldn't be having the best Christmas I have had in years." Dorian gave her a quick kiss as he heard the front door open.
• Dimwits & Dragons, by Ken T. (Part 4): The thunder of thousands of feet filled the air as Daria and Jane ran alongside each other, desperately trying to keep up with the horde. The draw of the Hunger was very strong now. Something deep inside Daria wanted to find a sword, a stick, anything, and start swinging it. All that little twerp gave her was a useless hat... wait a minute. She was able to pull a mallet out of that hat. Where did it go? (Daria/Dungeons & Dragons: The Animated Series)
• Finn Morgendorffer 55: Dreamer Without a Cause, by HolyGrail2007 (Parts 7 and 8): “Well, before that, we’re going to a film festival. Daria’s got a film playing.” “Really?” Jodie was completely surprised by that one. “That’s... that’s great. She made one, you said?” “With a film-making club she joined earlier this semester.” “Yeah, I was surprised, too.” “You’re going too, Finn?” “Jane asked me to come, Daria didn’t.” (Part 8)

• Jane Lane: Ace attorney—Turnabout Teacher's Pet, by LSauchelli (Parts 11 and 12): Jane was nervously going one more time through the court file when the Judge called for everyone’s silence and attention. “Order! Order!” He looked professional and solemn for a second, but Jane knew better now than to be fooled by his appearance. “This court will now begin the re-trial of Jane Babin, accused of murdering Superintendent Carwright.” “OBJECTION!” shouted Jane at the top of her lungs. (Part 12) (Daria/Ace Attorney game)
• The Lane That Wasn't, by LadieT (Part 17): Jane stared nervously at the old man. He gave her a reassuring smile. She leaned over, staring down into the blackness. Jane was about to walk back to the bench. The old man stopped her. "If you walk away, the hole will close. I will not be able to open another one. There is nothing to be afraid of. You cannot physically get hurt. I know that it looks like complete darkness, but it's just the way to enter your subconscious. The decent takes less than a second. Now, remember, your five minutes starts the moment that Jane wakes up. Good luck. I will see you upon your return." Jane summoned all her courage. She closed her eyes and jumped.
  
• Li Don't Like Mondays II, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "ALERT! ALERT! A SHOOTER IS RAIDING THE SCHOOL -" Tinny recorded sounds of a gun came over. "EVERYONE TO DRILL POSITIONS!" "Oh darn," sighed O'Neill. "Oh well, lockdown is in session, class!" Daria felt a brief surge of panic, only to notice the rest of the class looked... well, bored. That struck her as odd. "Jane? I know this class is boring, but has it really put everyone in such a stupor that they didn't hear we're being shot at?"
• Li Don't Like Mondays II (Alternate Ending), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): Daria turned her head and looked behind her at the offending freckle faced male. Her cold glare got a twiddle finger wave back from the boy in response. She turned her focus to her phone as she thumb-tapped a response on her keypad and sent it back: "dismembering & disposing of ur corpse creep" A few more quick thumb taps and the offending number was blocked before Upchuck's face had a chance to fall as he read the reply.
• MST version of TAG's "Daria 2007: The Girl from Hope" by Charles RB (Parts 3 and 4): [Won't spoil it for you!] (Part 4)
• No Child Left Behind, by Malakite (COMPLETE!): Mr. DeMartino had barely started in his rant about being interrupted for complete nonsense when Quinn (and everyone else) heard-or rather felt the explosion.Some of the tacky things on the walls fell off, as well as a cup near the edge of DeMartino's desk.
• Stardate: Esteemsters, by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): It was time for Worf to enter the simulation. Wearing a white shirt that had seen too many washings and a loose black tie, Worf strode forward confidently. "You shall remain seated," he growled. "Class...there is a new student in the classroom. Her name is Daria Morgendorffer." He paused. "You will greet her." The crowd mumbled almost inaudibly. It did not please Worf. "I stated... you will greet her!" He brought his fist down upon the desk, almost putting his hand right through the cheap wood. The class was... more enthusiastic, and the response was more genuine.

• Unnamed story (Daria/Dorian 6: Christmas Chaos), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT A LEOPARD SKIN BIKINI AND A CAN OF WHIPPED CREAM!"
• Unnamed story (The Hallowed Halls of Fielding), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): In the private hell of his darkened room, Anthony took another swig of the vodka. Again, his mind screamed at him that he should have had the damn balls to become a mariner like he'd dreamed. But he'd been scared. And so he'd meandered and now...
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Misery Chip), by smk (COMPLETE!): Data, carefully following his PADD display, "Esteem... a teen. They do not really rhyme, do they? The sounds do not quite mesh. And that, in fact, is often the case when it comes to a teen and esteem. The two just do not seem to go together. But we are here to begin realizing your actuality and when we do, each and every one of you will be able to stand proudly and proclaim, "I am." Now, before we... " Since Data had been too focused on his PADD to notice her raised hand, Troi spoke up, "Excuse me. I have a question. I want to know what 'realizing your actuality' means."
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Modern Day Daria), by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "BOMBSNIFFING DOGS? Are you serious?" "Yes, I saw the truck outside the school when Quinn and I were driving to the mall." "What the hell is Li thinking? Bombs? At 'Laaaaaawndale High'?" Jane's impression of Angela Li was spot on. Her impression of Angela Li in the throes of orgasm was always a hit in the girl's bathroom. "Really. You realize this means more cuts to the academic. music and arts curricula, right?"
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Modern Day Daria), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "So when you were my age, did you treat your mother with respect and listen to her?"

• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Ouch Time), by Derek (COMPLETE!): "We are the Borg. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated." "Heh heh, they said 'ass', heh heh." (Star Trek TNG/Beavis and Butt-head/Daria (maybe))
• The Vision of the Burning Cities, by jtranser (continued): Ensorceled in slumber, Christopher Atkins found himself walking slowly across a enormous, intricately woven carpet which seemed to stretch out all the way to the horizon. As he moved, he became aware of a peculiar sound coming from the area of his feet. Looking down, he noticed that the small sections of weave were rippling around his shoes...
  

No Cameras, Please

Just got home from vacation, still pretty bleary and a little brain dead. What's been going on since I was gone... got to have a most excellent Dariacon with Brother Grimace, only a week after having a most excellent one with Richard and Louise Lobinske, so I totally rule. Well, okay, THEY rule, but I get to rule a little bit.

The Midwest Dariacon 2010 is still on! Come and party!

Kara Wild has let us know that Anne D. Bernstein is teaching a class on animation. Whoa, that would be the best class EVER!

J-D asks, how often do certain Daria characters appear in the show? Check out his math and add your own thoughts.

J-D also has a few questions about "Gifted," regarding Ms. Li's behaviors. Post your own views. And he notes that gender-bender fanfics are often seen in the Daria fandom but not often anywhere else. Do you recall gender-flip stories in other fandoms?

Wouter asks, know of any celebrities who have Daria-like traits? If so, post about them.

Dark Kuno opened up a big can of win when he asked other writers about their least favorite part of writing a long serialized story. Got a ton of answers and debate. Good show.

Quiverwing has researched the issue of who on PPMB has the largest amount of no life, based on number of postings. And the winners are...

ART!!!

• Richard Lobinske has produced two superb renditions of Daria in a prom dress for a story he wrote, "Promise in Green." Thank you!

Moar l8r when my brain works again.

Off Today

Having a little Dariacon (aren't they all?) at Wonderfest today. Will return later. Enjoy your day!

And talk amongst yourselves. Think of a topic.

Moar Aprl Phule N00Z!!11!!111!

This post will fill up as the day goes on, so check back when possible.

Brother Grimace just reminded me of a little prank he pulled a year ago that almost sent me into Intensive Care. Such a booger. Very glad he's still around because I'm going to drop carnivorous ants in his pants at some undefined point in the future. Love you, man!

Richard Lobinske has just announced that he is going to rewrite his epic Falling into College series with all of the Daria characters as undead flesh-eating ghouls, as per the recent Pride and Prejudice and Zombies novel. Not to be outdone, Roentgen and Brother Grimace announced they were going to rewrite the entire Legion of Lawndale Heroes epic in the same manner, then were stunned to discover that Kristen Bealer had already done so. Rumor is that the dispute will be settled by dance-off instead of arm-wrestling, once it became known that Kristen could bench-press 400 lbs.

Kara Wild has left Daria fandom to write My Little Pony slashfic. Probably for the best.

smk has announced she is changing her name to SMK because of problems with her spell-checker.

Australian Daria fans are being asked to have their fanfiction and fan art appear upside down on the Internet in order to allow fans in the northern hemisphere to view their work in the correct perspective. So far no one has complained.

PPMB updates on the 4/1 situation may be found here.

ALERT! Angelinhel has started an April Fool's Day Iron Chef on PPMB! Go and see!

N00Z UPDAT!!!

• Jim North has cooties. Ugly ones. Click here and see.
  
• South American and South African Daria fans have asked whether they, too, should turn their fanworks upside down for the benefit of those of a northern hemisphere persuasion. They have been told no, this is an April Fool joke on Australia, but they objected so much to being left out that they too are now mandated to turn their fanworks upside down.
• Jim North's cooties have destroyed New Jersey. Details on these and other stories at twenty past the hour.
• Liz Ruiz wants moobs.
• PPMB is in mourning now that the last man-whore in North America is retiring.
• A link to artwork for Kara Wild's first My Little Pony porn novel has been posted above. NSFW or anything else. But you'll click it anyway. You know you will.
• Anne D. Bernstein has posted new artwork. This is not actually an April Fool thing, but enjoy it anyway.
• Jim North's cooties are now on strike and demanding a dental plan.
• NEW! Here is a review of Daria 2: The Curse of the Misery Chick, which came out last year. See if you agree with the reviewer.
  

Stay tuned for further updates. You may of course add your own news updates to Comments below.

Endings and Anniversaries

The end of an era has come. Richard Lobinske's epic Falling into College series has concluded. (I missed that little point over the last day or two, still believing there was more coming. Silly me.) If you have been a fan of this series, post your comments at the link. What epic series will he create next? The fandom awaits with baited breath.

"Malled" premiered 13 years ago today, and "The F Word" 10 years ago. Jake reminds us that Angus Young of AC/DC turns 55 today, still rockin' away too.

Today is Thomas Mundy Peterson Day in New Jersey, Cesar Chavez Day in the southwest USA, and Hanami (flower viewing day) in Japan. It's the 126thth birthday anniversary of astronomer Adriaan van Maanen (famous in Daria fandom because of this shared world). The Motion Picture Production Code that prevents us from seeing cartoon boobs on TV was enacted 80 years ago today. And this is the 414th birthday anniversary of philosopher René Descartes, who said "I think, therefore I am" and won a little mention in Daria fanfiction for that.

Tomorrow... we have a lot of jesters. Stay tooned.

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• An End to War, by The Sharpie (COMPLETE!): “It has been thirteen years since that day. As the fires burned above ground we were some of the lucky few who were in The Caves. I wasn't supposed to be there, but my company convinced the government that since I helped write a key part of the new program I should help install it,” Daria told her daughter....
• NEW! Anti-Trope, by Minx (Chapter 2 COMPLETE!): "So how was Bobblehead Bobby? Will you be seeing him again?" Dean asked. "I doubt it," Jane said with a smile. "I like my men with a normal head to body ratio." (FF.net)
  
• Finn Morgendorffer 40: Higher Learning, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 3): “So, when do you suppose they do the brainwashing?” Daria asked. “Freshman orientation," said Tom. "That way, even the dropouts send in their last dime.”
• Lawndale's Finest: Action Stories #4—Power Struggle, by Jim North (continued): Then, just as she was ready to reach down and reset the entire system, windows began to pop up, close down, and move around, seemingly at random at first but finally in a pattern that she recognized as all the command attempts she had been making before, all executing at once. "No no no no!" she screamed, grabbing the sides of the monitor and shaking it in frustration. When the window containing the article she had been writing shut down without saving, she slumped forward to rest her forehead against the screen.
• NEW! There's Something Furry in Denmark, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): Over the next couple of weeks, Jane noticed odd changes in her behavior. Her leg would start bouncing whenever she had an itch. She felt the urge not to use a spoon when eating something out of a bowl. If Trent played a high pitched note, she would have to cover her ears. She tried to block the strange occurrences out of her mind. (FF.net) (OD)
  

Thirteen

In Richard Lobinske's Falling into College series, Daria Morgendorffer met Jane Lane on October 14th, 1996. Happy 13th anniversary!

This is World Standards Day, whose website is not up to standard, at least using Firefox. (Can you spot the errors in the heading?)

And one of the actors who played James Bond turns 82 today. You go, dude.

Haven't figured out what else to add. Got any ideas? Put them in Comments. thx

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• Anti-Trope, by Pinkminx (Part 2): “I’m here to see the principal,” he said. The woman raised a questioning eyebrow and waited for him to continue. “I’m a new student.” He added, having a feeling he’d be using this line more than once during the course of the day.
• Fat Man's Grave, by TAG and Brother Grimace (Part 3): To stand in the entrance to Daria’s Inner Sanctum and gaze upon its eccentric splendor took my breath away. It was a teenage girl’s bedroom, but you wouldn’t have known it. It was a place where the color pink shriveled up and died.
  
• Our Time Now, by Charliefox2012 (Part 3): “Just trying to bring you out of your mood. You’re no fun once you’ve gotten irritated,” Jane said. “I’m fun?” Daria asked feigning surprise. “You know what I mean,” Jane deadpanned. “Meaning you won’t get any,” Daria said, raising an eyebrow.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Stacy's Mom, Where Are You?), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): Quinn showed up at Stacy's door and tapped her fashionable tennis shoes impatiently. C'mon, Stacy, if I miss a second of Boys 'r' Guys, I'm going to yank out your pigtails. [You are not going to believe this crossover. TAG]
  

A quick semi-tragic note

I won't be at Wonderfest this year. Caught a bad cold or something, coughing all over the place. Damn. Was hoping very much to see Richard Lobinske and wife, go out for pizza, look at great SF/horror/fantasy/dinosaur models, meet the hawt Cartwright sisters (Veronica and Angela). Double damn.

Well, heck, may as well sulk about it.

sulk sulk sulk

Oh, and there's a new Iron Chef on PPMB: 'Shipper Ficlets!

And...

OUTPOST DARIA HAS UPDATED! HUZZAH!

Happy Birthday, Daria! (Part 1)

Today is Daria Morgendorffer's birthday. It's the day that Richard Lobinske picked out for his various fanfics, anyway, so we'll use it for now. Glancing at the birthday photo at right (from The Daria Diaries), we see that Daria wasn't a particularly happy, cheerful, or carefree child even at age one. Quinn's birth was not far away, however, so perhaps she sensed trouble.

Using the most likely birth year for Daria from Richard's exhaustive chronological study, she would be 27 today. This varies, however, even with Richard's stories. Take your pick.

More on Daria's birthday (and her various other birthdays in fanfic) later today. And if you were to meet her today and found yourself overcome with emotion, she has this bit of advice: click here. You were warned.

P.S. Today is also the 145th anniversary of the Gettysburg Address, well worth rereading. It is also World Toilet Day today, but we are not going there despite all the disgusting Beavis and Butt-head pictures and stories I could use, oh the horror. That poor Holiday Island High teen.

Anniversaries, Left and Right

It's a long list, but here we go:

Daria's second-ever appearance on MTV was a mere 15 years ago today, in the Beavis and Butt-head episode, "Babes 'R Us." If you have the DVD Is It College Yet? you can watch Daria's appearance by unlocking the Easter egg hidden on the disk. (See the link for instructions.) I've seen this film clip and... she looks weird.

The first part of Brother Grimace's "The Sun Will Come Out, Tomorrow" was released eight years ago this month.

Kara Wild posted DWU #20, "Memory Road," six years ago this month.

"Silver Lining," the 24th story in the Falling Into College series by Richard Lobinske, takes place eight years ago at this time, following the events of "Through Lenses Most Bright."

Producer, director, and screenwriter Joss Whedon was born 44 years ago today. He was the creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which we know for a fact (thanks to "Speedtrapped") was one of Quinn Morgendorffer's favorite TV shows.

Want to know about the Trentmobile? Click the link. Want to add more information on it to the DariaWiki? Ditto. A picture would be nice, too.

More later!

Today is . . . QUINN'S BIRTHDAY!

Yes, according to Richard Lobinske's Falling Into College series, this is Quinn's 26th birthday today. Her birthday was revealed in "A Daze at the Races."

Today is also National Tax Day from Hell in the United States and its territories. Either way, Quinn or the government, someone's going to get all your money shortly.

When Only the Best Will Do

The curtain has rung down on the time for nominating Daria fan art for 2007, and a few comments about it are due.

First, Richard Lobinske performed a heroic job of assembling all of the known examples of Daria art, which is a job I frankly didn't pick up because it would have driven me insane. A heartfelt "Thank you!" is sent his way.

Second, but equally important, there was a vast amount of excellent artwork created last year. Much of it was from people I had never heard of before. I was taken aback by the terrific quality of the work overall, and there was an embarrassment of riches in the work I considered truly superb. I had expected a walkover by a handful, but the result staggered me. One more gi-normous "Thank you!" goes out to everyone who contributed.

In particular, the following artists produced certain works that seized my attention in a stranglehold. You should go to Richard's compendium and check out the offerings of: Acidgirl, altrntvgrlfrnd, Angel de Muerte, Beatnikshaggy, Biohazard-Kitty, blackcattlc, breitasparrow, Christ-Off, Christ Oliver, DJ, enigmawing, Esenkas, fyuvix, generationm, graficoslozano, Hershey-chan, ianmsquee, JjAR01, jmao, JNLN, Kajiq, kara-lija, Kara Wild, Kemical Reaxion, Lycissa, Mickychanz, NomadX, pupaazzoso, Richard Lobinske, S.C., seel-dingo, sle3pStar, theEvilTwin, TheHumbleEgo, Wouter, and Zackmolis. I only wish I could do what you do.

It's Saturday Night!

Ahem.

By kind permission of Daria writer Anne D. Bernstein, a link to her Buzzdome Blog ("Things that fascinate me that might interest you") has been added to the list at left. Thanks to Scissors MacGillicutty for bringing this to our attention, and of course thanks to Ms. Bernstein.

Also added at left is a link to Richard Lobinske's 2008 Visual FanWorks Listing, to get the New Year on the right foot. Thank you!

A rather long list of new fanfic is being compiled this evening. It will be posted as soon as possible.

D'OH! [slaps head]

I cannot believe I forgot that the Christmas Mistletoe Daria picture was already drawn out in larger scale by Richard Lobinske almost two years ago. [another head slap] D'OH!


Anyway, the thread in question is "Daria Alter-Ego Outlines on The-N" and it has lots of fun things for you to mess with. Thanks to Richard Lobinske for the pictures and the thread bump (get it? Bump? jeez, it was a joke, c'mon). At right is my attempt to create an image you can turn into wrapping paper if you tile it out in big sheets. Yes, I am a genius, thanks.


Time to head out. Party on most righteously!

Son of Alien Nation (Part 3)

Yes, it is time again for a few more alien lifeforms that you can find in canon in Daria. The yellow-green bipedal insectoid thing that walks in front of the Morgendorffers at the UFO convention in "Esteemsters" could be a human in costume, or it could be an extraterrestrial using the simplest possible disguise: pretend to be a costumed human at a UFO convention.

"The Lawndale File" offers the intriguing idea that Daria and Jane are themselves alien sex goddesses, but Richard Lobinske beat everyone to the punch with "It's That Guy."

Finally, Artie is himself probably knowledgeable about a vast number of aliens, having been kidnapped so often by them. See his cameo on the MTV website, for instance. For all we know, he is an alien.