Hot Diggety Dog!

Pull up a seat for the hot dog eating contest on this fine National Hot Dog Day, but don't expect to win. Mr. DeMartino is there and he looks ready to win.

If you'd like some dessert as well, today is also Vanilla Ice Cream Day! I prefer chocolate myself, but Mack will pass on the whole holiday altogether. That ice cream truck misadventure really ruined the treat for him for all time.

Fandom News!

• Watch and discuss pre-Beavis and Butt-Head Mike Judge cartoons.


• Share your random Daria thoughts in a new thread.


• Kem is looking for Netflix movie recommendations.

No Weiner Jokes, Please!

Kevin's gone waaaaay too far to observe National Hot Dog Day, but I must say it's nice to see him finally wear something that isn't a football player's uniform. Jake will be setting up his hot dog eating contest at any moment, so I'd clear out before Mr. DeMartino gets here. You don't want to see that.

Today is also National Gummi Worm Day, but whatever you do, do not eat any of them. Jane might be saving them for a special art project.

Fandom News!

• Share the best Beavis and Butt-Head band reactions and roasts.


• Talk about the death of Grant Imahara.


• Watch and discuss the trailer for Star Trek: Lower Decks.

He Really Does Wish He Were an Oscar Mayer Wiener

Kevin's taking National Hot Dog Day to quite the extreme, but I must say it's a pretty appropriate alter ego when you think about it. At least we've been spared the Oscar Mayer Wiener Song, which I'm sure is part of his repertoire alongside such classics as "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall." Jake, I'm sure, has ordered another crate full of hot dogs to celebrate, unless he just typed in the wrong product number again. Damn fuzzy computer screen!

Fandom News!

• Read about the Icelandic whalers who "accidentally" killed a blue whale.


• Discuss songs you vividly remember from childhood.


• Vote in the Deadliest Warrior poll between John Henry and Paul Bunyan.

A Holiday for the Dogs!

Everything's all set up for the National Hot Dog Day eating contest, but feel free to sit this one out if you're not interested in eating any more hot dog slices, hot dog jalapeno hotties, fried wieners, caramel-topped popcorn dogs, and whatever else Jake might have come up. Possibly including desserts.

Today is also Parent's Day, so let's all take a moment to reflect on the excellent parenting skills of Daria characters like, um, well....

Damn. Surely someone had to have done something right? Eventually?

Fanfic Update!

• Angela Li's Departure, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Tension was so thick you could enroll it at Lawndale State. It was the penultimate day, the day before the event the teachers of Lawndale High had stopped dreaming about due to the pain, the day no student could have conceived of. Tomorrow, Principal Li was retiring."


• Decisions, by elainefr (part 17): "Daria looked at her parents and waited for their reactions. Her mother held a perfect poker face, with eyes that seemed to be trying to see into her daughter's brain and figure out something."


• The More Things Change, by Two-Eyed Charlie (COMPLETE!): "Well Mr. Eichler, Mrs. Lewis, I suppose I could say that's the last of my promised story. After all, this pseudo-memoir was only supposed to help explain the genesis of Jane and my comic series. But--and maybe it's just the writerly discipline that's been beaten into me--I don't think I can just leave it off there."


• Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Stacy looked up from her spot on the couch in the common area to see Mack exit the elevator. 'Hi, Mack!' 'Hey, Stacy. Have you seen Jodie?'"


• Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 29): "Karen finished her workout, or if she were being truthful, it finished her."

I Toldeth Thee Not to Call Me That!

Today is Neptunalia, the festival that celebrates Neptune, the Roman god of the waters. Mack is looking majestic as Neptune in this alter ego, although I wouldn't want to be the one who calls him "Mack Daddy" while he's holding that trident.

Jake's also firing up the grill for Hot Dog Day, so come on over for the Hot Diggety Dog Eating Contest! Hey, a man's gotta get rid of a crate full of hot dogs somehow.

Fandom News!

• Talk about the 45th anniversary of the moon landing and share your experience of that day.


• Reese Kaine needs geographical assistance for a future convention.


• Is Daria a hipster? Share your thoughts.


• candy_darling is looking for help with a vague memory of a Daria ad.


• Feeling nostalgic for MTV? You're not alone. Tell everyone about it in a new thread.


• Wassersauefer would like some help with a new story idea: Daria the Super-Misfit.

Who Wants Some Hot Dog Jalapeno Hotties?

Today is National Hot Dog Day, so grab a footlong and--shut up, Upchuck. When everyone's done making their double entendre jokes about hot dogs, the Hot Diggity Dog Eating Contest can begin. I wouldn't enter if I were you, though. DeMartino looks pretty serious about this one.

Fandom News!

• The Daria Fanworks Awards needs a new (non-author) judge for Written Works! Are you up to the challenge?


• Share your thoughts (or apathy) about the new royal baby.


• edwardaveyard wonders what you'd have done if you'd been in Daria's position circa the episode "Fire!"


• ognawk is looking for contestants for a new game, Only Connect: Daria Edition.


• Talk about the upcoming live action Batman/Superman movie in the Weapons of Mass Distraction forum.


• Ranger Thorne wants to know how you keep Daria characters in-character.


• Robyn has a couple of questions about round-robin fanfics.

Anyone Got Any Ketchup?

Today is National Hot Dog Day! Jake has a few recipes to share if you need inspiration, but he doesn't recommend buying them in bulk. He also doesn't recommend you go up against Mr. DeMartino in a hot dog eating contest. That man is in it to win it. Just look at his game face.

Fanfic Update!

• The 180 Degree Turn Ch. 1: New Page, but Same Book, by Walter Kovacs (part 2): "They went out into the front yard and paused long enough to see the family moving in. The father was a typical yuppie looking fellow, the mother had long wavy auburn hair, glasses and wore a sweater with jeans. A boy who was Tom's height, who wore glasses was helping the father move a couch. Elsie guessed he was one half of a set of twins by the simple fact of a shorter, female version of him him walking around carrying boxes."


• Apathymorphs: The Invasion, by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "Without thinking I let out a roar. It seemed to explode out of my mouth like thunder. I can’t even describe how I felt. My fear was gone! I was a tiger! What puny little runt was even going to dare to challenge me?!"


• The Dork Kev Rises (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Gotham Rogues Stadium. The echo of detonators continued to ring, and the screams of the wounded and the terrified. Gradually, they became aware of the men with guns around them and the man in the steel mask."


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 9 Soaking Up Summer, by Shiva (part 5): "They were escorted by the man who had answered the door and shown to a parlor with only a minimum of fuss, where Daria instantly noticed that the Sloane’s were dressed to the nines, and one Sloane in particular noticed her just as quickly.. 'Wow Daria...' Tom said with wide eyes and soft tender tones, 'You look amazing.'"


• An Excerpt from "My Time With Helen's Hellions" (IC: Post-post Apocolyptic Daria), by Aloysius: "Dealing with Ms. Barksdale’s temper was always a tricky thing. As head of a salvor’s group, she had to be tough and capable - and she was both in excess. I’d heard the story about how she calmly shot her husband’s killer in his shoulder and hip joints and left him screaming in agony on the ground."


• Family New, by RLobinske (part 7): "Rita watched Amy nurse the coffee for a few moments before saying, 'With all that's been going on today, we haven't had a chance to catch up with each other. How are you doing? What's going on in your life?' 'Mostly working. The magazine treats me well. I enjoy living in New York and I get to travel.' 'But?'"



• Favorite Student (Iron Chef: Opposites Attract), by Walter Kovacs (COMPLETE!): "'Charles,' Ms. Barch said with a sadistic grin. 'For your detention, you must... Submit.'"


• The Hearts Within, by neonhomer (part 8): "'Stacy? You okay?' 'Yeah.” Said Stacy. 'I’m just still a bit shocked.' 'Shocked?' asked Jane. 'No one has ever stood up for me.... Ever.'"


• Immortal Blood, by Shiva (part 8): "The car magazine helped to hide his clandestine reading for the rest of lunch and in his next class, however he was kept from fully engaging with the text since he had French class with Mohammad, which meant he was required to talk to him. But he was able to finish the first chapter on vampire basics by the end of class, in addition to what he had already read, Skylar had learned about his new biology."


• Introduction by Jared Diamond (Iron Chef: Crossovers with NonFictional Works (and Beyond)), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "The theory, in brief, is that Daria Morgendorffer's intelligence does not come from some innate property but is rather the result of a chain of developments resulting in a disproportionate distribution of IQ."


• Lawn Trek (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "Tom Sloane Lieutenant Junior grade of the USS Lawndale was being hunted, he was marooned on this planet along side Lieutenant T'Daria Morgendorffer after their expermental ship crashed." (Continued by Roentgen) (Continued by Vukodlak)


• The Love in Which I Long For (IC: Selective Soulmate), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "'I don’t know Sandi, online dating is creepy. It’s why we’re so exclusive. I doubt it’ll ever catch on.' Quinn suggested."



• Operation Glitterberries: Chapter 08, by BF110C4 (parts 4 and 5): "'Oh my god Daria, it’s me Marianne. What happened to you?' 'Then you do know me. Umm, I wonder...'" (Part 5)


• A Resentful Cynic Ch.4 : Revenge of the Malled, by ST91 (part 3): "It was difficult for Charles to find a place, since that no girl wanted him around and the boys were frightened of being contaminated by his reputation. Charles didn’t blame them, because for them he was just Upchuck. The road to redemption is long and difficult, he had thought while picking up all the courage he had, which had gone to asking Daria if he could sit next to her."


• Sexy Daria: Sexy Cute Models, by Shiva (part 7): "The stage lights came on and the two fashion victims lead their lambs to the slaughter. Daria strode out first like she owned the join, followed by her sister Quinn, Sandi, Stacy, and a very heavy girl named Dawn Harris. 'Whoa!' Jane said in shock, 'Look at what Daria’s wearing.' 'I know...' Scarlett breathed in equal amazement."


• ST: VOY: ANJ 02: Voyager Tales, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Kate entered the holodeck, into a large entrance hall with curved walls. The door closed. She looked back and saw a round door. She started walking further into the smial, for smial it was. ‘Very curious,’ she thought. She followed the curve of the corridor around the interior of the hill and found Daniel in the library.'Lord of the Rings, huh?' she asked."


• This Place... (IC: Post-post Apocolyptic Daria), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "Jane... her name was Jane... Oh how she hated that place... She continued to read her book."


• True Home, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'I wish Trent would check on me more often here,' Jane thought with only a hint of begrudgeness, 'But I guess his new lady friend is taking up valuable checking time.' Jane the smiled to herself, 'Still it's nice to have him in Boston... A fringe benefit of him dating Daria now I guess...'"


• Unexpected Hookup: Underneath It All, by Shiva (part 1): "Daria felt perfectly, beautifully content, on her side on top of the sheets of Ronnie’s bed, with Ronnie on his side next to her. Very much next to her, in fact they were enjoying some (fully clothed) after school cuddling time together."


• Upchuck's A Man (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Chuck Ruttheimer staggered out of Andrea's house, blinking and confused. More confused when he saw Jane's brother's band, Systic Mire or something, waiting in the street."

"How does hot dog jalapeno hotties sound for tonight?"

Today is National Hot Dog Day! Today would be a great day to order that crate of bulk rate hot dogs you've been wanting, so go to town and remember to save some for the Hot Diggity Dog Eating Contest. My money is on Mr. DeMartino. Look at him; you can tell he just wants it more.

New Fanfic!

• Crossing Stars, by Silver: "'But some of the non-essentials...well, the light over my console still flickers, the plumbing's still dodgy, don't ask what line got hooked into Mack and Jodie's shower. Got that routed correctly now...' Jane managed a rather sheepish grin at Daria's half-shocked, half-exasperated expression. 'So, is the reactor going to shut down when we jump?' Daria said after a long moment. 'No, but if we start pushing more than 25% lightspeed the toliet in the head outside the engine room floods.'"


• Green Dragon Rising, by Grifter74: "Goldar approached Rita cautiously, stopping where he knew she hear him, before speaking. 'Your Majesty, I have concerns about this human you have chosen.'"


• Homeless Daria Episode 3: A College Try Gives Me Blisters, by RX-87 (part 13): "'DARIA!' Daria looked up in utter elation to see Jane waving at her from a second story window. She looked like a drowned cat, disheveled and soaked with water, but alive. It took Daria a moment to realize she was smiling. Not a sly little Mona Lisa smirk, an enormous, joyful smile showing off her miraculously still pearly white teeth."


• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin’s Genie (Chapter 5), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "'We are approaching the spot,' Elias said. 'I don’t see anyone,' Quinn said. 'Neither do I,' Elias said. 'Clearly it’s some kind of hoax!' Dennis said. Elias looked at Dennis. He knew that Dennis had been involved with hoaxes of a similar nature."


• Mad Dog's Legacy Chapter 10: Rock On, by Hyrin (parts 2 and 3): "'You want to spend three hours in that broken husk of a van because your brother’s cute guitar player is coming?' 'Daria! I didn’t know you thought Jesse was cute! But what about Mack?' Jane teased, dancing around Daria’s futile attempts to hit her with her backpack" (Part 3)


• The Night It Ended, by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "'I'm sorry, Stacy,' Sandi muttered, hair hanging around her face as her head dropped forward. 'If you didn't have to take care of me--' 'I don't have to do anything, Sandi,' Stacy interjected sternly. She moved around the table and knelt beside the chair, folding Sandi's hands into her own. 'I want to. You're my friend.'"


• Rude Awakening Ep. 7: Don't Sign Me Up!, by DIsaac (part 7): "KEVIN: Uh Un, You want ME to do this. Me - Kevin Thompson to talk for BOTH of us! DARIA: Exactly. KEVIN: Daria, New plan. DARIA: No new plan! No new plan! KEVIN: I'm calling an audible!"


• Settling Into A New Life, by RLobinske (part 1): "Daria Morgendorffer said to her mother, "It looks like Quinn created the event of the season like we always expected her to do.' Beaming with pride, Helen said, 'She certainly did.' Rita Barksdale said, 'Quinn's beautiful. Everything is beautiful.' Grinning himself, Jake said, 'And it didn't cost a fortune.'"


• Unnamed story (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "'Aquarius, Huston,' the radio crackled. 'Are we on VOX?' Quinn bellowed at Sandi. 'No, we are not on VOX!' Sandi roared back."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Defenestration!), by Derek (COMPLETE!): "'So Mack-daddy, why am I handcuffed to this stretcher again?'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Eric’s an okay guy?), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "Eric sat at his desk and sighed. A glance at the clock showed him that it was almost 3AM, but he was still there. Suppressing a shudder at the thought of going back to an empty home, he looked around his office. He scoffed as his eyes fell upon the picture of the dog -it had come with the frame- and forced himself not to look at the picture hidden behind it. In his mind, he could see the image perfectly, and his lip quivered as he thought of the beautiful woman and baby who were behind the dog."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Guilty Pleasures Redux), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "'Don't- ah, whatever. Ok, now I told Jodie we were gonna go over plays for Friday's game. If anybody asks, make sure you remember, got it?' 'Got it.' 'Ok, you ready to do this?' 'Sure am!'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Guilty Pleasures Redux), by Wormbait (COMPLETE!): "Closing the door behind herself Helen stood quietly and listened for a minute. Hearing nothing she made a quick curcuit of the ground floor to double check that she was alone before heading up the stairs."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Last Friday Night!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'I just want to know one thing from you, Judith,' growled Reiko."

Oh, I Wish I Were an Oscar Mayer Wienermobile...

Just 74 years ago this day, the very first Oscar Mayer Wienermobile was built (according to the Sick, Sad Life Planner). This unique brand of automobile has not gone unnoticed in Daria fanfiction. Great story, Dr. Mike.

Nelson Mandela turns 92 today. Happy Birthday, dude. You rule!

Lord Akiyama tries his hand at redesigning Jane Lane. Hmm... blue...

FF.net (other links added to stories' first mention in this blog)

• A Few Years Difference, by Vlora (Part 6): In her high school years, Daria had never bothered to attend a gig, or even a shindig. Occasionally she was roped into birthday parties (which sucked) and that was about it. All her life she had dedicated herself to not fitting in. That was what she liked people to believe anyway… So the fact she was walking toward an old van with some slacker who happened to be really, really cute? Unbelievable. Some would even go as far as to say actually impossible. But Daria was (apparently) a go getter now, thanks to the slack community of Lawndale where breathing quietly was a talent.
• NEW! From the Fractured Life of Stacy Rowe, by Respite (COMPLETE!): [From PPMB earlier this year]
  
  

PPMB

• Daria/Dorian 5: Mountain of Truth, by LadieT (Part 1): Jane broke off the embrace and sat down on Dorian's bed and rested her head against the padding of the wall. She patted at a spot next to her. Dorian joined her. She grabbed the pillow from the top of the bed and placed it on her lap. She directed his head to rest on the pillow. Dorian laid down staring up at the ceiling. Jane started brushing her fingers through his hair. She looked down and stared at his eyes. For a moment, she could have sworn she saw Daria in them. "Hey Daria... I know you're in there... talk to me."
• NEW! Daria: The Puppet Princess of Lawndale Kingdom, by OverlordMikey (Part 2): "Daria, how long are you just going to lay there bemoaning what happened?" Quinn asked angrily. "I'm sulking, not bemoaning. There is a difference." "Daria, how many times have I told you, 'If you want something, go for it.' Don't just stand there complaining about it. How do expect our society to move past the Middle Ages if we never get more powerful female leaders?"
  
• Finn Morgendorffer 53: Purely Magnetic, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 4): “You have a crush on Henry.” Paul’s matter-of-fact tone of speaking was not helping matters. “I do not.” Daria tried being as blunt as he was. “Okay. No big deal. You know, I was thinking Henry should get...” “No! I don’t do dating. I barely do friends. I wanna keep things where they are. It works, it's fine.” “Alright.” Paul shrugged, and Daria wondered whether he just didn’t care or didn’t believe her.
• NEW! Judith Strikes! Mack Dynamite vs. the Crimson Phantom, by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): Judith sat up, unashamedly nude, and began brushing her hair out. "God damn. No wonder they call you Mack Dynamite." she said. In the bed behind him, Mack Dynamite smiled. "You do realize that I'm still gonna have to run your sexy ass into the slammer for what you did." he said, pulling a joint from his nightstand and lighting it. Judith put her glasses on and looked at him with a smirk.
  
• The Shadow Education, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): After a last sweep for electronic bugs (it was her house but you could never be too careful when it came to Li), Diane Bennett took her seat. “This emergency meeting of the Shadow School Board is now in session.” (FF.net)
• NEW! Sleepwalker, by Jim North (continued): "Ow, Ms. D!" Kevin whined as he snatched his arm back. "That totally hurts!" Claire sighed, grabbed hold of his hand, and wrenched his forearm back over to her. While the wound left by Stacy's nail file hadn't really been very serious, the deep gouges taken out of his arms just above the wrist were much nastier. They had already washed the lacerations out in the small bathroom behind the office, but Claire insisted on treating them with iodine from the first aid kid they'd found under the front counter.
  
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Jane is Daria's imaginary friend), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): On the walk home (because her parents were always going to be too busy to pick her up), Daria decided this imaginary girl should be called Jane. Nice, normal name. (She'd wanted such a name at times, at least one that couldn't be turned into a term for bowel movements.) Jane could tell her about the upcoming lessons (okay, O'Neill had told them at the end of class): "So, then, after the role-playing, next class they put the girls and the guys in separate rooms and a female counselor talks to us about body image."
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Straight meets Gay), by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): [Too short to sample!]
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Straight meets Gay), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Who is this guy again?" Jane said. "My name is Stonewall," the young man said. "I'm sort of a day of commemoration rather than an actual Holiday, but trust me, it's a lot more complex than most people know." Stonewall didn't say much about himself, but it was clear even to the blind that he was FABULOUS! "A lot of the Holidays out there are realllly conservative, and I needed to get out of there and blow off steam." "There's not much we can help you with," Daria said. "We're just not part of that scene." "Oh, definitely. So I decided I'd bring some help with me!"

Are two Heads better than one?

Another marvelous freaky moment in the series, if you were paying attention. It's the end of "Prize Fighters," and Jake Morgendorffer is sponsoring a hot dog eating contest to advertise his business. Lots of kids walk up to watch the fun.

Among them is The Head, walking in from the left side of this image. He's coming up behind Bob.

Also walking over is The Head, coming in from the bottom of the screen on the left side.

What the hell is going on here? This school has more mutants than Xavier's Academy. Does this have anything to do with the time The Head's glasses turned black, or when he appeared on a milk carton as a missing kid? Does Shaggy (over on the right side, orange shirt) have anything to do with this?