Saturday, February 26, 2011

"My neck modeling career is over!"


It's National Pistachio Day! Crunch some pistachio nuts with your lunch. Buy them by the bunch. Send them to friends far away to munch. Especially send some to Quinn, who is allergic to the dye and will most assuredly appreciate the gesture!

In the meantime, though, pull up a bowl of pistachios and enjoy this fanfic update!

  • Bound to Highland, by RLobinske (part 3): "Helen walked down the hallway to them. 'I'm sure you couldn't help but hear. I don't think we will be hearing from my family any time soon.' 'So, we're not going to the wedding?' Quinn asked to confirm. 'If Mother had her way right now, we wouldn't be allowed in the same state.'"

  • Cafe Digesto (Pie, Pie, My Darling), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Why can't I just sell chocolate door-to-door?' Daria swallowed, to prevent the sudden influx of drool from escaping and making her look like an ass. 'Well, Ms. Morgendorffer, I took the liberty of examining your permanent record, and it seems there was an...incident in your past related to candy fundraising.'"

  • Canto Tre, by untra (COMPLETE!): "I had packed only a few things I really cared about. Just some shirts, a pair of jeans, a few dark skirts, boots, socks, a sweater, and an olive green jacket. I brought a few old VHS tapes, a few CDs, and about fifty of my favorite books. I packed a small box of my favorite stationary. I took a few old videogames I no longer played and an old desktop computer. Everything else I threw away."

  • Daria is Raven's Apprentice, by project pegasus: "Staci: Was that when she and you were fighting over Aaron Carpenter, former lead singer of the Eromenos Boys? Hilary Dorff: (embarassed) Yes, it was. Staci: Didn't he turn out to be gay or something?"

  • Day of the Daria, by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "'"Could be worse?"' Daria said, turning and pointing the shotgun at a spot where Tom's legs meet his body. 'How could they be worse, Tom?! We're trapped in the middle of a zombie apocalypse and my sister is lost out there somewhere, Not to mention the lack of food and ammo we currently have. How could it be worse?!' Panicking as he realized the safety was off on Daria's shotgun, Tom quickly backpedaled. 'Your right, it can't get much worse than this.'"

  • Dreams, by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "The Highland Dream and The Greyfield Dream both start the same way. She is sitting in her refrigerator box 'house', reading her favorite book, 'Black Beauty'. She hears her father calling her name."

  • The Flab Brat (Pie, Pie, My Darling), by Smijey: "'Look what I made, Kevin!' Quinn called out. Daria and Kevin turned at the same time, to behold Quinn, bearing a chocolate cake on a platter. 'CAKE!' Daria roared, and lunged forward. Quinn, seeing the inhuman look in her sister's eyes, shrieked and accidentally tossed the cake in the air."

  • For Better or For Worse, For Richer or For Poorer, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "Erin lifted her hand to read one word: 'INTELLIGENCE.' 'Ohhh,' she murmured. 'You mean you work for, like, the--' Brian shook his head quickly to silence her, then took back the napkin and dunked it in a water glass. 'I can't go into details here. However, my apartment is secure. If you'd allow me to escort you there, it should be safe to explain.'"

  • General Semantics, Private Angst, by gwrtheyrn (part 36): "The Monstrator, in her heart of hearts, felt disaster drawing near. Far from ensuring peace, her mission seemed certain to be the spark to set off open war. Enro apparently thought that he had a chance to conquer the Galaxy by force. Even without her agents' reports from the locus rem, it would have been obvious that the dreadful man had deliberately provoked the current crisis. But there was something he wanted, something he didn't have yet. She wasn't sure what it was, but had a good idea where to look for it."

  • Illumination ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "Daria opened her eyes and looked at her father's concerned face. 'Judith...' she whispered. Jake nodded gravely. 'This has been a long time coming, kiddo,' he said. 'Things are moving and they're going to accelerate soon. There's people trying to slow her down and even stop her, but they know deep down they won't be able to.'"

  • Invaders, by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "As bullets bounce off my skin, I rush forward and grab one of them by the face. He screams as my fingers find their way into his eye sockets, popping the squishy orbs within. I easily haul his larger form over to the nearest wall and smash him into it and then through it, sending out a spray of brightly painted concrete, followed by his slightly crushed body and then by me as I compress my body down to fit through the hole."

  • Is It 'Mania Yet?, by TheExcellentS (COMPLETE!): "O'Neill: 'Thompson throwing the big punches as only he can here.' Barch: 'Yeah. Everyone else's punches actually hit once in a while.' O'Neill: 'Are you watching the same match that I am?' Barch: 'This match is still going? I was hoping to catch a nap before Upchuck's public execution... er... I mean title match.'" (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

  • Lawndale Seven Chapter Two, by Wassersauefer (part 1): "There had been happy times in the live of Tiff'aany, called Tiff by most. She remembered when she had been playing with her brood sisters and brothers, when she had time to be a child and when she had gotten her first birthday present. Sometimes she even remembered the face of her mother and sometimes she dreamed of a gentle voice singing softly to her and strong arms rocking her to sleep. Back when she had been named Blum, before her gift had been noticed."

  • Life After Highland (Iron Chef: Lawndale State), by LadieT (part 18): "'...I knew we weren't going to be anything more than a house band. So I quit and decided to focus on school. Trent felt as though I was abandoning my dream - I tried to explain to him that, for me, being a musician was a hobby. I should have never accepted his marriage proposal.'"

  • Mad Dog's Legacy Chapter 1: First Impressions, by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "'I've got this paper my mom told me to give you if anything like psych tests came up.' She pulled out a sheet of paper and handed it to Li, who skimmed over it quickly. 'I assure you, our test has nothing to do with this at all. If your mother has an issue with this, tell her to call me, but in the meanwhile you will take the test just like the others. 'Dammit,' Daria whispered, too softly to be heard." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Mad Dog's Legacy Chapter 2: Party Animals, by Hyrin (parts 1 and 2): "Brittany looked up and, for the first time, realized who she was sitting with. 'EEP! Please, don't hurt me! I'm sorry that Kevvy was such a jerk to you in class, but that was still really mean of you to call me that...that....mean name!'" (Part 2)

  • Promises, by LadieT (part 6): "Jane sat down and gently took Quinn's hand. She gazed around the room for a moment, watching and listening to the machines that surrounded her sister-in-law and friend. Then, she stared down at the petite red-head who was lying on the bed in front of her. Jane fought back the tears as she looked at the casts and the bandages and the breathing tube that was forcing air into Quinn's lungs."

  • Quinn's Code - 02: Invite of the Geek, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "He turned to Quinn. 'Hey, Quinn, what about you?' 'You want me to go to your girlfriend's party?' she asked. 'Sure!' Kevin said, unfazed. 'Sure,' Quinn said. 'My first real party in Lawndale! I hope it doesn't get as rough as those in Highland!'"

  • Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "'Sounds good to me. And speaking of dark nightmares, Upchuck just walked in. And he seems rather agitated!' It was an understatement. His eyes were rapidly moving from right to left and back, quickly scanning the bar and lounge areas to see if some vicious enemy was parked in the shadows waiting for him to get within range and drag him by the freckled neck to a waiting car and hideous death. He breathed a small measure of relief when he saw no one matching that description."

  • Second Rate ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "JUDITH: If I'm gonna get my ass kicked by a version of a co-dependent little twerp who followed me around at summer camp, I want her to at least be competent about it. AMELIA: (fumes) JUDITH: Awww...whatsa matter? Is widdle Amelia gonna cwy? Come on, get mad. I've seen you scared. Let's see what you're like when you get pissed. Come on...COME ON, YOU STUPID BITCH! LET ME HAVE IT! OR ARE YOU JUST A COMPLETE FRAUD?"

  • Someone Else's World, by Charles RB (parts 1 - 4): "She was so busy thinking about that, she noticed, too late, that her mother was watching her, and looking distraught that she wasn't eating. Daria froze – she rarely saw her mother like this, never felt comfortable or sure how to resolve it – and realised, too late, that was entirely the wrong move. Helen looked sadder and sadder, and finally couldn't look at Daria. She thinks I'm doing this deliberately. Why would-" (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

  • Squad 88 (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Attention, students - this is your principal! As you are well aware, this is something we have expected for a long time! Return to your classrooms immediately, and do not, I repeat, do not leave the school grounds until we can be sure that we can return all of you to your homes safety. Just remember, students - your peaceful behavior brings glorrry to Llllllanwdale High!'"

  • Summer Fling, by GingerLove84 (parts 2 and 3): "TIFFANY: Hey Saandiii. Isn't thaaat the guitaaar playeeeer you said you were datiiing? SANDI (flustered): Tiffany dear, you must have misheard me. TIFFANY: Why is heee with Daaariaa? Did she steeeeal him? (Bt) That's sooooo wrooooong." (Part 3)

  • Unnamed story ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Raskolnikov (COMPLETE!): "The man held the doll for a moment, and he took out something from his pocket. Clenched in his fists, as if he was hiding something precious from a harmful presence, he took whatever he had in his hand to his mouth, and for a moment it looked like he was going to kiss it. But no, less than an inch of his apparent goal, he stopped the trajectory of his hand and held it. He breathed on it. And then he put whatever he had in his hand inside the doll, and started digging on the hard ground with his bare hands."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Objectivization of Women), by Raskolnikov (COMPLETE!): "'Considering that... let's start the first Fashion Objectivism Club meeting. The first issue of the day: tangerine or orange? I think that-' With the sound of the Word 'orange' Stacy started sobbing desconsolately. 'What is it now, Stacy?', Sandi asked with impatience. 'Sorry... It's just... I miss Quinn! Why she couldn't see the truth?! Why did she have to abandon us??' Her sobs started to increase in volumen until they become a high-pitched bawling."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chief: Amnesia), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "The first thing I remember is pain. Blinding pain. I remember that I threw up because of how much my head hurt. I remember crying and whimpering, begging, praying for death so that the pain would stop. I open my eyes, and through the horrible blur I make out a face. Black hair, or is it brown? Wait, its two faces, staring down at me. Am I on the ground? Yes, I am. How did that happen?"

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chief: Amnesia), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "She scoured her mind and began to panic as she found huge gaps, completely empty. No name, no past, no sense of self, no anything. There was knowledge, but it was all generalized. She knew what a car was. She knew how a light bulb worked. She knew how the concept of Manifest Destiny had been used to justify the Spanish-American War. But everything about herself was gone. Simply (help me help me oh god help me) gone."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "After dinner, everybody put on their best clothes to greet Mad Dog's brother, and waited. Finally, after half an hour, there was a knock on the door. Mad Dog put on a scowl, walked over to the door and, after a moment, opened it. A ball of yarn hit him squarely in the face. 'Meow meow, brother!' came an effeminate voice."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "She blinked. Her eyes darted around the room, took in the sterile white walls and beeping equipment, the paper-thin gown that barely hid her body from indiscriminate display and realized she'd found herself in a hospital. Her mind was a whirlwind of panic when she realized she didn't even know who She was, or how she'd come to be in the situation she found herself. So she blinked; it was all she could really do."

  • What Did You Do During The War, Daria?, by echopapa (part 1): "Jane watched as her friend's face became solemn. It's still strange to watch this, she thought. I've seen lots of people take serious stuff so lightly, but she puts her very heart and soul into it every day. Daria held out her hand so that the ring was touching the battery. 'In brightest day . . .' she began."

1 comment:

jtranser said...

Thanks for the Upchuck pic!