Poor Unfashionable Soul

Quinn has found a way to make her hair bouncier than ever by celebrating Mermaid Day, but she will be horrified when she realizes that she's wearing last season's seashells. I just hope she gets out of the water before she gets, in Stacy's words, "all pruny."

Perhaps Trent and Jane can take the opportunity on National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day to revisit Earl and Barbara and try some more of their cellophane cheese sandwiches and overpriced cookies. On second thought, it might be better to just skip the trip down memory lane.

On this day in 1998, the episode "The New Kid" aired. In it, we got to meet a rarely-seen, slightly eccentric, and somewhat childlike new character. That's right, it was Robert's time to shine!

Fanfic Update!

• Closer Than Before, by avav3 (COMPLETE!): "Daria awoke the next morning to silence. She sat up straight in bed, rubbing her face with her hands, her hair tousled."


• Spider Quinn 15 The New Challenges, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "Quinn arrived at school not long after. She began hearing rumors of Jamie’s claim as she headed to Homeroom."


• Waif's Newest Addition, by janendaria4life (part 1): "It was just like any regular day for Quinn Morgendorffer as she giddily walked around Cashman's."

Janet, Warrior Science Teacher

Either Ms. Barch is celebrating Lucy Lawless's birthday or she's finally got a clear shot at Mr. DeMartino. Then again, why can't it be both?

Today is also National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day, so head over to Earl and Barbara's for some homemade potato chips! Just don't fight the dip. The dip will always win. Resistance is useless!

Finally, today is the anniversary of the episode "The New Kid" in 1998. It was the first (and almost only) appearance of Ted DeWitt-Clinton, a shamefully underused character. Good thing we have fanfic to make up for the loss!

Fanfic Update!

• Party at 111 Howard (Iron Chef: Party at Casa Lane), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 6): "Andrea entered Jane's room after some hesitation. She saw that there were many art supplies. 'But is there a large tub of paint?'"

Janet, Warrior Princess

Happy birthday to Lucy Lawless, born on this day in 1968 and undoubtedly one of Ms. Barch's idols. I don't know of any Xena/Daria crossovers, but if you do then please let me know in the comments! If not, well, then someone had better start writing.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "The New Kid," which aired on this day in 1998. The most notable thing about this episode is the introduction of the character Ted DeWitt-Clinton, but it's also worth noting the fact that Daria just completely beats the crap out of Quinn at the end of the episode. We really need to talk more about Daria's random violent streak, don't we?

Fandom News!

• What do you think about The Fugitive getting another revival?


• Rémi posted a new Iron Chef: Quinn stayed at Stacy's place.


• Discuss Daria plots that won't work in the present day because of modern technology.

Calling Ruttheimer the Prestidigitator!

The girls' bathroom currently has both smoke and mirrors for Smoke and Mirrors Day, but I think the holiday is supposed to refer to magic tricks. Then again, they did trick Mr. DeMartino into interrupting a Tommy Sherman seance, which was pretty magical. Does that count?

Today is also National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day, so drop by Earl and Barbara's place for some cheese-and-cellophane sandwiches. Or not. I recommend not.

Finally, this is the anniversary of the episode "The New Kid," which aired on this day in 1998. No smoke and mirrors here; Daria actually went on not one, but two dates! Both of which crashed and burned hard, but let's not dwell on that part.

Fanfic Update!

• Crusader Queens, by Roentgen (part 2): "Helena Morgendorffer remained in her bedroom in the keep. She waited on her husband. God knows where he was or what he was doing."


• Daria Who? in "The Macra-Economic Terror", by YouthofOz (COMPLETE!): "JANE: Well that was a complete and utter waste of time. Trying to paint Earth-rise on the moon would be way easier in atmosphere! Why didn't any of you remind me that you can't use acrylics in a zero-vacuum?" (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)


• Erin Chambers, by OzFerret (part 21): "Blinded by renewed tears of pain and grief Erin stumbled down the stairs of G-bar. Oblivious of the silence her arrival caused, she threw herself into her usual bar stool, leant her head on the bar and sobbed."


• Great Professor Dario, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Slowly and with all the care he possessed, Dario put his son A.J in the crib. His wife Claire Defoe did the same with their daughter, Heather Helen."


• IRL, by atiyatortilla (COMPLETE!): "It was 8:55 PM, five minutes until closing, and Kevin Thompson was left feeling dejected. He should've known that nobody would show up."


• Jim And Kevin's Excellent Misadventure (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn, Daria, Stacy, Lindy, Sandi and Tiffany are watching TV. Stacy: Thank's for having us over, Quinn. Quinn: No problem, Stacy. I figured since our husbands are having a guys night out we might as well have a girls night in." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Journey into Misery, by Captain Marbles (part 2): "Meanwhile, back at 'La Grande Hotel' (It's a chain), Daria's parents were beginning to worry."


• No Rain, by Lady Evil (COMPLETE!): "'Oh night....' sang Jesse. 'Diviiiiiiiine!' He wasn't a boy soprano anymore, but he could still handle the note with a little coloratura. 'Oh night, when Christ was born!'"


• Pragma (Iron Chef: Random Pairing Challenge 2019), by Szcz (COMPLETE!): "Dust came with the evening wind. It was not as disturbing in Appalachia as at the lowlands, but disturbing enough. Stacy Rowe closed the window, and began to make the bed."


• Unnamed story (LLH Short Entries #2), by Roentgen (part 180): "'So what did you think of Sergeant Nemec?' Sandi said. 'Wouldn't that be Sergeant Major Nemec?' Andrea said, drolly. 'She likes to remind me of her exact rank.'"


• You Want It Darker, by LSM (part 9): "Life drifted on, as life did. Days blended into each other and Jane passed them creating and discovering. She painted, things she couldn't explain and had no idea where they came from, but everything was blue and yellow gold."

This Holiday Really Belongs to Ruttheimer the Prestidigitator

Although it's Smoke and Mirrors Day, I don't think a seance in the girls' restroom is quite the intended method of observing the holiday. Then again, there's smoke and there's mirrors. I guess I can't fault the logic there.

If frozen bread and cellophane wrappers are more your speed, you can celebrate National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day with Earl and Barbara! Enjoy a two-dollar cookie and some echolalia--echolalia--while you're at it.

Finally, we wish a happy anniversary to Ted Dewitt-Clinton, who appeared for the first time on this day in 1998 in the episode "The New Kid." We didn't see much of him after that episode, but he still had an impact in fandom.

Fanfic Update!

• The Date, by elainefr (part 5): "'What's say we go out for a celebratory pizza and you stay over. I passed my test with flying colors, thank you for your help.' Jane suggested to Daria while Daria exchanged books at her locker between classes."


• From Both Sides, by mailorderannie (part 11): "The Justice of the Peace glared at the intruder. 'Young man, this is not an appropriate time to bring objections to this union! In granting a license, the state has affirmed that there is no legal bar to this marriage. If you had any other objection, you should have brought it up to the bride and groom well before this time.'"


• High School Never Ends, by CaffeineAddict94 (part 2): "'There's no way that this is decaf'. 'Well, er, no. It's, um, half-caf'. 'Stacy, you know what caffeine does to my face'."


• The Lost Girl, by Hammyham (COMPLETE!): "'Goddamnit Helen, where will my golf clubs go now Daria's home?' I put down my suitcase on the bed I vacated seven years ago and sighed."


• Someone had to do it, by Rémi (part 8): "The family was sitting around the kitchen table, sharing a meal of microwaved lasagna while Quinn babbled about the nose job of some girl at school."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "She's thin, in an almost unhealthy way. Frail, perhaps. Quinn's mind speaks these thoughts to her, fingers feather light as they trace over the outline of a bruise on her bedmate's arm."

Um...Abra Camaro!

Kevin is about to show us a magic trick in honor of Smoke and Mirrors Day. Let's hope that the trick doesn't involve any actual smoke, because I wouldn't put it past him to set something on fire. Any chance those bunnies are flame-retardant?

Today we also have the anniversary of the episode "The New Kid," which aired on this day in 1998. We should really go all out to celebrate this one. Anyone got any gum?

Fandom News!

• Jeremy Garrett shares a strange news story about a young man who got a tattoo of a McDonald's receipt.


• Fans of the movie The Breakfast Club celebrate its 30th anniversary.


• The website Television Without Pity is closing.


• Share your favorite wham lines in Daria fan fiction.


• Potrzebie suggested a collaborative run-on fanfic idea.


• Dark Kuno posted a link: 27 Stunning Works Of Art You Won't Believe Aren't Photographs.

Don't Fight the Dip!

Happy National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day! Earl and Barbara would like to offer you some homemade cheese sandwiches. Make sure you unwrap the cheese before you bite into them, though.

Today is also the anniversary of the original airdate of "The New Kid" in 1998. Can I offer you some gum to go with that cheese sandwich?

Fanfic Update!

• ARC Ch.6 Drowned in a cappuccino, by ST91 (part 4): "The rest of the short journey passed in silence and then, when Charles turned down the private road leading to his house, he said, 'Here we are.' Jane gasped. Charles' house was a beautiful villa in colonial style with an enormous garden studied in minute detail."


• Daria and Jane: On Why There Aren't Any 'Daria as a Black Girl' Fanfics (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Jane: 'So Daria, I've been going through some old Iron Chefs and I've noticed that any that involve you being born black or interracial don't seem to gain much traction.'"


• Darius Taylor, by Shiva (part 4): "As Elsie drove them home after they had spent a good three hours celebrating the start of summer with the 'Cool Townies' (as Elsie and Tom had christened them), Darius's phone blew up."


• Dylan, by J-D (part 18d): "'That sales technique of yours turned out to be surprisingly effective', said Rod, who'd been watching with interest. 'It was a mistake.' 'You impressed me', said Tierney, who'd woken up some time earlier. 'Thanks.' The expression on her face made Dylan feel uncomfortable."


• Getting Back Together (In the most ass backwards way possible) (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Oh goodie the pizza's here!' Timothy O'Neill cheered as the doorbell rang. As he headed to the door he did feel another stab of sadness, after all it had only been a month since Janet had died."


• God Save the Sexy Esteem (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Shiva (parts 1 and 2): "After being driven in the worlds only punked out station wagon, Daria waited for a second to let Killer have her fun before stepping out of the car, and planting the sick idea that they hadn't moved at all in her father's head." (Part 2)


• Inner Universe, by malakite (part 7): "Jane, as usual, sat alone in the cafeteria eating her unusually meager lunch. She spoke with a clear and amused tone to her sandwich 'So, now Kevin's my lab partner.Next best thing to working alone.' No one else gave this even the slightest attention."


• Irony Maiden 01, by BF110C4 (COMPLETE!): "A groggy voice then came from the bed. 'Why are you telling me the surf conditions Amy if you know I don't do surf?' Everyone who then heard the answer would no longer believe the voice to be something as mundane as an alarm." (Part 3)


• Judicium (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'So how did a good-ol' boy like you wind up in a place like this?' Daria asked of the guy in the ten-gallon cowboy hat."


• Love is Strange, by Shiva (part 3): "Daria and Jane came within range just in time to hear Quinn Morgendorffer scream, 'Dammit Evan! You got too close to me with your Nut World smell. I'm allergic to pistachio dye and now I'm breaking out! My life is over!'"


• LSD, by PrecambrianStudios (part 2): "For Daria, being Deaf had never particularly troubled her."


• More Sick, And Not as Much Sad (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Upchuck raised the whip into the air and brought it down on Daria's naked back. She screamed as the flesh tore off her body. Without avail, she tried to struggle out of her bonds: a set of old stockades."


• Sexy Daria: The Misery Sex, by Shiva (part 3): "Even though Ronnie had been honest in his Atheism to her from the get go, Scarlett had decided she was comfortable enough with him to invite him to join her during one of her Wiccan rituals."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by percussivemaintenance (COMPLETE!): "Jane: Hey Daria. Daria: Yeah Jane? Jane: Where did you say you used to live before you moved here to Maryland? Daria: Texas. Why?"


• Victor Morgendorffer, by Shiva (parts 6 and 7): "The next morning Victor woke up with a very hazy memory and after checking his room and seeing that Danny and Jesse weren't present, tried to remember the details. But it was simply too hazy." (Part 7)


• When the Cat's Away, by SinisterExaggerator (part 1): "She studied the papers another time. They painted a story shrouded in mystery: something was striking the heart of suburbia, and perhaps the hearts of its residents."

Janet, Warrior Princess

Happy birthday to actress Lucy Lawless, born on this day in 1968. Ms. Barch is emulating Lawless's most well-known character, Xena, who is also most likely the teacher's role model. Let's hope Barch never thinks of bringing a sword or, worse, wearing skimpy metal armor to class.

It was also on this day in 1998 that the episode "The New Kid" first aired. We not only got to meet Ted DeWitt-Clinton, but also Robert--two very odd young men for the price of one!

Fandom News!

• Do you agree with what Jeremy Clarkson says about metrosexual men? Discuss why or why not in the thread.


• The Angst Guy is looking for help troubleshooting his website.


• A Daria reference has surfaced on Twitter! Check out the link in the thread.


• Vote in a "Deadliest Warrior" poll, but beware--thread derailment in progress!


• Discuss the new series Legend of Korra in a new thread.


• Erin M. introduces the first episode of his TV review series "Into the Idiot Box."


• Three new Iron Chefs have been posted in Creative Writing: Ranchoth's Daria, as if produced in a Retro-Future world!, ThanatosRW's Famous friends, and Reese Kaine's The Holy Fried Egg scepter.

Janet Barch: Warrior Princess!

Happy Birthday, Lucy Lawless! You (as Xena) are Janet Barch's favorite TV character! Interesting that Barch uses a phallic dagger and not Xena's real weapon of choice. Hmmm, did that mean something?

"The New Kid" appeared on MTV twelve years ago. There are stories that Ted DeWitt-Clinton's appearance as Daria's first "real" boyfriend was not met with the wholehearted approval of the fandom. Maybe everyone wanted Daria for themselves. Or everyone preferred her unattached, or attached to Jane. Water over the dam now. Daria/Ted wouldn't have happened anyway.

This is also National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day, so we have gone back to "Camp Fear" and dragged out Earl and Barbara, who owned the dreadful unique cookie business at the general store. Good luck, you two!

N00Z!

• Mack Mackenzie has bad habits? He does now!
• Midwest Dariacon 2010 now has an activities list! Foremost among them appears to be stepping in cow poop at the state fair.
  

PPMB

• The Best and Brightest, by Smijey (Part 1): "Jane, I'm pregnant and Trent's the father." "Interesting." "If it's a boy, we're naming him Kevin, and if it's a girl, we're naming her Brittany." "Go on." "Damn it, Jane, you're not paying attention!"
• Finn Morgendorffer 40: Higher Learning, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 1): “Jane, you’re one of the best artists out there, and I know how you work. Just relax, it’ll come. Your best work comes when you just let things go as they should.” Finn chuckled. “Wow, that came out a little more dirty than I thought it would.”
• Sleight of Hand, by Minx (COMPLETE!): Death doesn't discriminate, it doesn't factor in things like wealth, social status or age. You won’t know when, you won’t know how, but it will happen. Most of you will pass on to greener pastures; to your own personal utopia. A select few of us however won’t be given this opportunity, at least not straight away. No, we stay behind. We are given a new body and a new identity and it will be our job to ferry the fortunate souls to the other side. My name was Daria Morgendorffer. Now I am a Grimm Reaper. (FF.net)
  

Live the Cyberadventure!

Fourteen years ago was the most awesome cyber-event ever (for a little while): 24 Hours in Cyberspace! All of 14 years ago. Primitive, man. They must have used tin cans on strings. Dinosaur era.

This is also the birthday anniversary of Jules Verne, famed pioneer of SF writing. He was the inspiration for this story.

MidnightStorm has pointed out that Glitter Berries is difficult to reach now at Freehostia.com. Could it have gone offline?

ART!

• Pinhead offers two new ones: Rembrandt's "Blessed Kevin's Destiny" and Jane Lane's "Portrait of My Brother." NEW! And "Divine Intervention." Wow.
  
• Minx presents the awesome The Third of May, by Goya. Look familiar? Jane was painting a copy of it in art class in a certain episode. Which episode was it? NEW! Plus, "Quinn (my style)", by Minx again!
  

FF.net

• The Prodigal Daughter, by a440 (Parts 1 and 2): From the Lawndale Sun-Herald: FAMILY FOUND DEAD AFTER BEAR ATTACK - What started out as a hunting trip in the wild turned into tragedy when Douglas Thomson, his wife Charlene, and their son Kevin were found dead as a result of a bear attack...

PPMB

• collar, by Jim North (COMPLETE!): Everything was delicious, as Sandi had come to expect it would be. Stacy often spent several hours in preparation for breakfast, more than she did for any other meal. She would work the previous night, preparing what parts could be set up and stored, followed by an early start making sure that everything came out perfect. (SFMB)
  
• NEW! Daria: Hunter—Strictly Business, by Jim North (continued): Quinn Morgendorffer was a predator, sleek and grinning, never stopping, and devouring everything in her path.
  
• The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued): "When you're a small child, Reality is everything your mom says. Then you get older, and Reality takes on different meanings and aspects...."
• Fight Like Hell, by Shull Bitter (Part 1): "I'm sorry," Jake told Daria. "But there is something terrible I need to tell you. I swear to God I wish I didn't have to. I don't want to do to you what Mad Dog did to me. But it's either you or Quinn."
  
• NEW! Finn Morgendorffer 31: The Artist, The Boyfriend, The Bitch, and Her Brother, by HolyGrail2007 (Parts 2 and 3): “What did you do to get her help?” “The most horrific thing known to man.” “Sleep with her?” Jane’s eyes widened. “Oh God, it does get worse!”
  
• General Semantics, Private Angst, by Gwrtheyrn (Part 9): "Shot to pieces. Burnt into ash. I exercised my last option. I am dead, dead, dead, no two ways about it." (Daria/World of Null-A)
• The Glory of the Gridiron, by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "After decades and decades of games, the history of sports competition has led up to this sorry spectacle. From Lane County Stadium, the Jane Lane Broadcasting Network brings you... JANE BOWL ONE!"
• Stacy X, by Sir (COMPLETE!): Stacy aimed the heavy chunk of black metal (guns were really unfashionable and ugly) at Sandi’s stunned face and pulled the trigger (breaking a nail in the process). There was a deafening BANG! and then a blinding flash of light (at this moment Stacy felt like God). Stacy looked on with a goofy grin plastered on her face as the 513th official Fashion Club meeting turned into scene from Hell.
  
• A Ticket to Ride, by Doggieboy (Part 4): Ted then opened the blouse and looked at her reflection in the mirror. He nodded and smiled. “Like what you see?” Linda asked and closed up the lipstick tube. “Very much so,” he said.

Elsewhere

• And Then I'll Make It Clear, by Minkhollow, formerly known as Cimorene (COMPLETE!): Jane sighs, and takes a few pictures of another gravestone. Even knowing what Puritan naming traditions were like, Daria still can't fathom why anyone ever thought "Increase" was a good name for their son. Daria lets her evade the question a while longer. Just when she's on the point of saying something again, Jane stops dodging the point on her own.

Who the "Angel of Death" Might Have Been

It appears that sometimes the animation artists, at least those who color in the cells, get their instructions slightly wrong. The image here is an unidentified episode (if you know which one, please let me know) showing the Asian girl who normally wears a white sweater now wearing a black sweater. It's my theory that the "Angel of Death" from "The New Kid" is actually this girl, with a mis-colored outfit.

I love the way Andrea's rolling her eyes at something Kevin's just said.

Animation Anomalies: The Angel of Death?

Here's an interesting anomaly that UU passed along to me while working on Backgrounders. This is the yearbook club from "The New Kid."

Who is the black-draped figure at the far right, talking to Andrea and the girl in bib overalls?

I think I know who it was supposed to be, based on a similar animation error elsewhere, but maybe someone else has a better idea. In our e-mails I remarked that maybe it was the Angel of Death. No one seems upset about this character being here. Weird.

On a related note, everyone is invited to visit Backgrounders and jot down (in Comments, below) any background characters you especially want to see more of, for your own interest or for a fanfic you are working on. Feedback is always good.

Thanks to UU for this excellent shot!

Brand New Caption Contest!!!!1111!1!!11!1!

Put your caption(s) in the Comments section! Have fun!
(bonus points for sheer rudeness)

That New Kid

Eleven years ago, Ted DeWitt-Clinton appeared as Daria's potential new, first-ever boyfriend in "The New Kid." The episode stirred up a storm of controversy at the time, as not many people wanted her to hook up with him. They need not have worried. I still think Ted was gay.

Robert, however, was Daria's first real date. Not likely he'd show up on her date planner in the future, either.

Ted and Robert, however, came to be great friends. Maybe we'll see a Ted/Robert 'shipper one of these days. It could happen.

Moar l8r, stay tooned.

L8R: There's more fanfiction, but it will have to wait, got to go out for a while.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: A well-known fan artist has generously allowed DFB2 to premiere a brand-new artwork this coming week. You MUST stay tuned for more. It is AWESOME.

Jazz.com has a note that there is a new jazz singer in the D.C. area who, if I understand the blog post correctly, looks like Daria. Here's a pic of her with The Bad Plus, the jazz group she's with. Hmmm, I dunno, we have people in the fandom who look more like Daria than she does [COUGHKristenCOUGH], but I understand the resemblance.


PPMB

• Complications, by Legendeld (Part 6): “She shows up at my house and wants to make out, then she freaks out and starts screaming for me not to touch her. I’m done with her.” He turned back to the driveway. “And I’m sending a bill for the water damage to my car.”
• Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Chapter 2, Part 2): “You think you could dial the pep down a little?” Jane asked with a smirk. “Nope,” Stacy said, smiling broadly. “I got some good news this morning, and I’ve been up all day. Not even Mr. DeMartino could get me down.”
• Things Fall Apart, by Doggieboy (Part 4): “We have an emergency on D-159. A very bad one, I’m afraid.” “Oh?” “A class-3 zombie outbreak. One of their DELPHI operatives is waiting for us at the office.”
  

The Vanishing Photographer

In the Beavis and Butt-head episode, "Sporting Goods," fifteen-year-old Daria complains, "My parents made me join the school paper. The paper made me fashion reporter because I'm a girl. I hate fashion! There's no fashion in this town! I want to be an inquiring photographer." She then proceeds to use her skills to put an embarrassing photo of B&B, with accompanying article, in the school newspaper.

One year later, in "The New Kid," she briefly joins the yearbook staff of another high school and again becomes a photographer, but only to get a first-person shooter game for her computer by trading in the software her parents will get for her. Her interest in becoming an inquiring photographer is gone, despite the high praise lavished on her photography work by Ted Dewitt-Clinton. Daria's interest in photography reappears only rarely in the series. She creates a photographic essay for Mr. O'Neill (in The Daria Database) and makes a video of her sister in "Monster," but that's about it.

Whatever happened to the budding "inquiring photographer"? Why did Daria stop using her considerable talent at camerawork? Could this interest return later in her life, perhaps in college? Not many fanfics have looked at Daria's photography skills (except in AU stories), and it would be nice to see that inquiring photographer resurrected, with a very Daria-ish twist.