By the way, what is Jake reading that's making him so happy? Put your answers in Comments.
FF.net
- Falling into College Year 4: How Did We Get All This Stuff? by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): "Daria really has him whipped now," Gina said before popping a piece of double chocolate into her mouth.
- The Quiet Ones, by Smileyfax (Part 3): In the newest installment of this wholesome family comedy, we read: Bobby Stuart realized sometime last night that he had ruined his entire life over a piece of ass. He supposed he should be grateful he didn't actually sleep with her -- then he would be facing statutory rape charges, and he was vaguely aware that most prison inmates tended to frown on such things. As he sat up, he noticed with shock that Quinn sat on a chair in the corner of the room, hands in her lap. "Quinn!" he exclaimed, leaping out of bed (thankful he had fallen asleep in his clothes). "What are you doing here?"
PPMB
- Jane Lane: Spider-man, by Lorenzo Sauchelli (Part 1): Before Jane could wonder what the teacher was talking about, he started handing over pamphlets of the Maryland Science Center. He stopped next to a red-haired boy exchanging a few words with him and then kept going. “We’re going to visit a private showing of the latest advancements in genetic engineering.”
- Kappa Daria, by Peapotmaster (Part 2): On the set of the Lilly Mu Show, the cast is getting ready to work on next week’s show, as Mikey Simon, Lilly, Mitsuki, and Gonard are reading their scripts. “I can’t believe this, Guano,” Lilly spoke to a small purple creature with a light blue gem on its stomach. “Didn’t we do this scene last season?”
- Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: A Day At The Races, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): “So, what’s it like being a Legionnaire, Julia? All sorts of high-tech stuff, that cool plane, not having to wear a uniform all the time, and – ooooh – Trent Lane, that Mack Mackenzie and Tom Sloane, all under the same roof!”
- More Apocalyptic Daria, by NightGoblyn (continued): “The less you fight me, the faster this will be over, and the sooner you can storm out of the room swearing at me,” Tom says in his ‘infuriatingly reasonable’ tone.
- Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Have: TGIF: Several well-played ficlets of woe by Greystar and Derek.
- Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): The "We'll Be Here All Eternity. But We Are Thinking of Changing Our Name" frag. Truly a weird experience I hadn't counted on.
- Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Angst Lord Time Trials), by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): "I found her, Daria."
- Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Aware of Changes), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): I can't spoil this one. Hang on tight.
- Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Aware of Changes), by Disco316 (COMPLETE!): "You know, it's funny." "I'm not laughing."
- Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Aware of Changes), by NightGoblyn (BEGS FOR MOAR!!!): "When I went to bed last night, I was a girl."
- Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Finish the Story, Your Way), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "What are you telling me? He wants to watch? I don't know... Ow! All right, all right, he can watch. Hey, where are you going? Did someone flash the-the-the bim... Man, what's wrong with my head??"
8 comments:
"57 ways to kill a squirrel? Neat!"
"Creamed squirrel over biscuits? Mmmmm, that's sounds good!"
Jim Ellenbogen, 71, served as a Corporal in Korea and Vietnam, and taught for years at Buxton Ridge Military Academy of undisclosed causes.
He is survived by an ex-wife, two children who never speak to him, and five grandchidren he's never seen. Contacted for comment, Buxton Ridge Commandant Col. William Gridder said, "Oh, Ellenbogen. He was a s**thead, so I let him go.
Ellenbogen will be buried in an unmarked grave in a potter's field.
I don't think the paper is making him happy. I think Helen is in the picture, we just can't see her . . . .
I don't think the paper is making him happy. I think Helen is in the picture, we just can't see her . . . .She must be making the creamed squirrel over biscuits in the kitchen, then.
Dennis is the clear winner so far, IMHO.
AP Wire - LAWNDALE, Maryland, 48 minutes ago.
TAKING PARTNERSHIP TOO FAR
Two partners in a well-known local law firm were among a number of persons arrested early Sunday morning at the Imperium Hotel.
Eric Schrecter, 45, and Tobias 'Toby' Horowitz, 52, of Lawndale, were discovered by police in the hotel's rooftop arboretum, during a sweep of the hotel for individuals involved with an high-priced prostitution ring. According to police officials, Schrecter and Horowitz were in the company of a woman later identified as Janet Barch, 45, also of Lawndale and a science teacher at Lawndale High School, and all were found unclother and involved in what is being described as a 'compromising positioning'.
At a press conference held Sunday morning, newly-named partner Helen Morgendorffer (of the Law Firm of Vitale, Horowitz, Riordan, Schrecter, Schrecter, Schrecter and Morgendorffer) announced that Schrecter and Horowitz were released on their own recognizance, pending a court appearance to be held at a later date. She stressed that all particulars were involved in a joint activity being in a private area reserved for them, and that the firm is considering options as to what she referred to as 'the blatant overreaching of police powers by local law-enforcement officials in their interruption of a legal matter being dealt with between the law firm and a representative of Lawndale High School. She further added that civil charges may be filed by the involved parties against the arresting officers and the Lawndale Police Department, as that option is also being considered.
Detective Lieutenant Melinda Hadley, in a statement released by the LPD, insisted that the letter of the law was upheld during the incident. According to Lieutenant Hadley, sixty-three persons, including Schrecter, Horowitz and Barch, were arrested and charged with various offences including
Maryland Criminal Code 27§553 (Unnatural or perverted sexual practices), Criminal Code 27§553. (Sodomy), and Maryland Criminal Code §11-306: running a house of prostitution.
Representatives for the Imperium Hotel and the Lawndale School District had no comment.
Aaaaaaaaaaand now we have another winner. Sodomy: It's not just for lawyers and teachers anymore. :)
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