Thursday, March 31, 2022

She Prefers Her Potatoes in Cheese Fry Form


I don't think National Tater Day is Daria's favorite holiday, but maybe if you threw in some sour cream and chives she'd like it a little better. Hopefully it's at least been cooked, although knowing Jake's cooking skills and short attention span, it's kind of a toss-up.

If you have potatoes or other produce, be sure to thank a farmer because today is National Farm Workers Day! No word on whether or not Trent ever became a farmer paid not to grow crops, but I'm sure Daria wishes he had refrained from growing that potato.

Finally, today is the anniversary of both "Malled" in 1997 and "The F Word" in 2000. The only potatoes eaten were the fries at the mall food court, and the students utterly failed to succeed at doing any farming.

Tuesday, March 29, 2022

Janet, Warrior Science Teacher


Either Ms. Barch is celebrating Lucy Lawless's birthday or she's finally got a clear shot at Mr. DeMartino. Then again, why can't it be both?

Today is also National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day, so head over to Earl and Barbara's for some homemade potato chips! Just don't fight the dip. The dip will always win. Resistance is useless!

Finally, today is the anniversary of the episode "The New Kid" in 1998. It was the first (and almost only) appearance of Ted DeWitt-Clinton, a shamefully underused character. Good thing we have fanfic to make up for the loss!

Fanfic Update!
  • Party at 111 Howard (Iron Chef: Party at Casa Lane), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 6): "Andrea entered Jane's room after some hesitation. She saw that there were many art supplies. 'But is there a large tub of paint?'"

Sunday, March 27, 2022

And the Loser Is....


Daria's getting ready to thank her agent for helping her win one of the Academy Awards being given out tonight, but she'll be disappointed to learn that the Academy doesn't give out awards for dazzling academic achievement in the face of near-total misanthropy. Maybe next year, Daria!

Today is also Quirky Country Music Song Titles Day, so while Daria's in front of the microphone she might favor us with a rendition of "Well, Bust My Legs and Call Me Shorty." Go ahead, Daria! Win that CMA!

Fandom News!

Friday, March 25, 2022

She's Still Standing!


Helen's all decked out for Elton John's 75th birthday, but I doubt that Vitale, Davis, Horowitz, Riordan, Schrecter, Schrecter, or Schrecter will be impressed by her ensemble. Still, you can't deny that she looks confident!

Today is also Waffle Day, but be sure to check the sell-by date before you eat any. You don't want to deal with poisoned waffles or a very mild stomachache!

Fanfic Update!
  • Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 26): "'Sylvie, I love you like a sister, but if you don't stop hugging me to your boobs every five minutes, I'm going to resort to drastic action.'"

  • Daria: Spring Is Icumin In, by Meester_Lee (parts 5 and 6): "In the midst of life we are in death. Rikka had heard that phrase back in Vegas and had wondered where that came from." (Part 6)

  • Lawndale Homecoming, by LadySparrow (part 8): "Daria met up once again at Pizza Empire for a few slices while Jane vented to her about the night before."

Wednesday, March 23, 2022

Watch Out for Puppy Kickers!


Shhh! The puppies are napping and you don't want to disturb them, especially on National Puppy Day. They're so cute when they're sleeping! And any other time, too. They're puppies, after all.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Monster," which aired on this day in 1998. Always remember that Quinn's pores are:

1. cute
2. tiny
3. invisible

The life you save may be your own!

Fandom News!

Monday, March 21, 2022

Iiiiii Goooooot Nooooo Striiiiings


Sorry, Jane, but even though today is World Puppetry Day, even being turned into a puppet will not make Tiffany funny. If anything, she has become slightly dumber. Only slightly.

Today is also Credit Card Reduction Day, a holiday that the Fashion Club will presumably ignore entirely in favor of that big sale at Cashman's.

Fanfic Update!
  • Born in the USA, by ladyevil (part 2): "At Jim's Paintballing Jungle, Jim, dressed in fatigues, addressed the gathered students and adults on the specifics of the paintball course."

Saturday, March 19, 2022

Sandi Can Eat Her Dust!


Stacy is having an awesome International Sports Car Racing Day, and the best part is that Sandi isn't there to ruin it for her. Yay, Stacy!

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "The Story of D," which aired on this day in 2001. Poor Daria suffered the first agonizing trial of rejection, but as an aspiring writer I'm sure it wasn't the last. Yay, Daria?

Thursday, March 17, 2022

No Short Jokes, Please!


I see the Holiday Island leprechaun is excited for Saint Patrick's Day, so I guess he's made his peace with the congenital green beer thing. If you celebrate today, please do so responsibly!

Today is also Absolutely Incredible Kid Day, so let's take the opportunity to remind Daria that "we tell you over and over again that you're wonderful and you just...don't...get it! What's wrong with you?!"

Finally, it was on this day in 1997, 1999, and 2000 that the episodes "College Bored," "Daria Dance Party," and "Murder, She Snored" first aired. If you combine all three (rowdy frat boys, parties, and murder) you get a pretty rockin' St. Patrick's Day!

Fanfic Update!
  • Born in the USA, by ladyevil (part 1): "On the road, two Lawndale High school buses were traveling to Jim’s Paintball Jungle. On the first bus was Mr. O'Neill, Mr. DeMartino, Daria, Jane, Alfred, Jodie, Mack, Kevin, and Brittany."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (COMPLETE!): "May started with a holiday. Hagrid and some of the older students spent the last several days of April gathering and stacking wood for a bonfire in one of the School’s green spaces and erected a May Pole in another." (Part 62) (Part 63)

  • Fire in my head!, by 21stcentrenaissancelady (COMPLETE!): "Daria couldn’t get Tom’s gaze out of her mind. She remembered the exact moment."

  • Lawndale Homecoming, by breitasparrow (part 7): "'You don’t have to do this,' Tom said as he watched Samantha pack up the last of her things. 'We’ve been doing well all this time.'"

Tuesday, March 15, 2022

Buzz Off!


Jane has the right idea for Buzzards Day, but comparing them to Claude and Romonica seems unfair to buzzards. At least buzzards don't make their prey feel insecure before they move in for the kill.

Today is also the Ides of March, so beware! The Ides might be planning to do something mean again.

Fandom News!

Sunday, March 13, 2022

Warm Ears, Tired Brain


Quinn's sure enjoying Earmuff Day, but she won't be so happy when her friends find out those earmuffs cost them their provisions. Also, mid-March seems like an odd time to celebrate earmuffs. Wouldn't one of the colder months make more sense?

Today also begins the ridiculousness that we know as Daylight saving time, so I hope you all remembered to set your clocks forward an hour if needed. It's not like I was going to use that hour for anything useful like sleep, anyway, I guess. Grumble.

Fanfic Update!
  • Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 25): "Daria was surprised to find Jennifer at their meeting spot on the way to school, banging her head against the stop sign hard enough to make it wobble."

  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 60): "By the last week in April, Daria had learned an important lesson about Scottish weather: whatever the calendar date, Winter did not yield as easily as it did back in Texas."

  • Daria: Sisterly Forgiveness, by UnbiasedStorytellerno1 (COMPLETE!): "'Hey Daria!' 'Hey Jane..' Jane ran down the street to where Daria was slowly treading to school."

  • Doctor Who - Changes in Time and Space, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "Alarms started blaring as the Stargate began to activate. 'Unscheduled Offworld Activation!' Harriman called."

Friday, March 11, 2022

Does an Apple a Day Keep the Mortician Away?


It's Johnny Appleseed Day (again), the holiday so nice they celebrate it twice! Still, Kevin is more than happy to plant some apple trees, especially as they'll be easier to grow than a memorial crutch.

Today is also National Funeral Director and Mortician Recognition Day, and if Daria followed her recommended career path then I hope she has a good one. Just...hopefully not by drumming up extra business.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, March 9, 2022

Brain Sold Separately


Quinn is celebrating the only person more artificial than herself on Barbie Day, which is the anniversary of the toy's premiere in 1959. Which makes the doll 63 years old. No wonder she's had so much plastic surgery!

Today is also National False Teeth Day, but I don't recommend you make yours out of stainless steel. Unless you really like Cyndi Lauper songs.

Finally, it was on this day in 1998 that the episode "I Don't" first aired. The marriage may not have lasted (I feel like Erin and Brian's making up at the end of "Aunt Nauseam" probably wasn't permanent), but the memories of Daria's ugly dress will last forever.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 59): "Daria had been back at Hogwarts for over a week when her real birthday came around."

  • It's a Massively Overprivileged Life (The 1002 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by Lady Evil (COMPLETE!): "Tom ran up to his room. He was free!"

  • Party at 111 Howard (Iron Chef: Party at Casa Lane), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 5): "In fact, Quinn wasn't far away. 'Oh!' she said when she realised when she saw the house up the street."

Monday, March 7, 2022

That's Not How the Food Pyramid Works


Jake's enjoying National Cereal Day, but I'm hoping he sets aside the super-challenging brain teasers and actually eats some breakfast. Quinn will probably have a bowl of Model Crunch, which I assume is without any calories or nutritional value whatsoever.

Today is also Plant Power Day, so power to the plants! Especially the ones that inexplicably sprout from wooden crutches.

Fandom News!

Saturday, March 5, 2022

"Isn't one of you enough?"


Looks like Quinn is celebrating Multiple Personality Day with her absolute favorite person in the entire world. If you have a Eunice within, let her out for a little while today! Especially if she keeps crying.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Fat Like Me," which aired on this day in 2001. I have mixed feelings about the way body image issues are handled in this one, but I can't help but laugh whenever I hear Quinn shout "Did Cleopatra rest when she was inventing mascara? Did Neferiti rest when she was posing for statues? Did Helen of Troy rest when she was doing whatever it was she did? Beauty never rests! Now, swim, you cow, swim!" Classic.

Fanfic Update!
  • ATTENTION WHORE MAGIC, by SPEEDCOREIDOLATER (parts 1 and 2): "'3...2...1...' Daria Morgendorffer knew her sister incredibly well - though to be fair, reading Quinn wasn’t exactly a daunting task." (Part 2)

  • Caf√© of Contention, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "'Class, I thought today we'd take a break from the tragedy of Romeo and Juliet to discuss the real-life tragedy that happened last night here in Lawndale. Let's share our feelings of violation following the loss of our beloved cybercaf√©, alt.lawndale.com. Who would like to start?'"

  • Daria: Spin The Bottle, by Meester_Lee (part 8): "After walking by Axl’s piercing and tattoo parlor, Daria decided that while she was done shopping for the day, she’d have to talk to Mom and Dad about getting her ears pierced."

  • Lawndale Homecoming, by LadySparrow (part 6): "The funeral was scheduled for ten o’clock that morning. Daria had called Jane the night before to give her the time and place."

  • They're Standing on My Neck, by Blake C Stacey (BlakeStacey) (COMPLETE!): "The alley behind the Zon did not smell quite as bad as Daria had anticipated. Perhaps the cheap dead cigarettes covered the urine, or perhaps the beer had diluted the latter to the point that it was mostly water."

Thursday, March 3, 2022

Lonely Old Ladies Like Dead Commies, Too!


Mrs. Blaine is pleased to note that today is World Hearing Day and, while she herself may be deaf, she's just glad to have some company. Even if said company is reading her some uber-violent stories.

On that subject, today is the anniversary of the episode "The Old and the Beautiful" in 1999, which marked Mrs. Blaine's only appearance. It was also on this day that the episodes "Esteemsters" and "Antisocial Climbers" aired, in 1997 and 2000. Happy anniversary to Daria, the TV show!

Fandom News!

Tuesday, March 1, 2022

No, Not THAT Smile!


It's Share a Smile Day and Daria is sharing her best--or rather worst--smile with us. All I can say is that I'm glad we never had to see that smile in the regular series because...oof.

Today is also Plan a Solo Vacation Day, and the idea makes the introvert in me want to share a smile. I'm sure Amy is already planning this one, as well as all of the ways she'll make sure to rub Helen's nose in it.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria: Spin The Bottle, by Meester_Lee (parts 6 and 7): "Daria awoke feeling tired and irritable. It was one thing to have her hormones awaken: she liked that. It was something else to realize that she still had a lot of garbage from her past that she needed to sort out. That wasn’t so good." (Part 7)

  • Lawndale Homecoming, by LadySparrow (parts 4 and 5): "The next morning, Daria was awakened in her bed by Helen’s muffled shouting. She looked at her alarm clock. 9:30 am." (Part 5)

  • Made in America, by ladyevil (part 10): "Daria felt her breath quicken. She felt hot and cold at the same time. She felt her stomach churn violently. She hid behind one of the giant stuffed toys and started rubbing her left wrist, feeling only a little bad at ruining Jane’s paintjob."