Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Give Me an F!

"Malled" premiered 12 years ago today, and "The F Word" 9 years ago. Interesting that Jane tried out a number of roles in the course of the show, but Daria tried out only one. Jane went for cute girl (at right), track runner, retro girl, cheerleader, all sorts of stuff. She even tried out as a tattoo.

I think Daria will still be working on that one lone role when she turns 30. Not Jane, though. "Daria, don't you think you have enough cats in this apartment?"

Big surprise coming soon. Get ready for it.

MOAR GNUZ: The Daria Fandom Drinking Game has gone into overdrive. Bottoms up!

Brother Grimace is searching for information on zombies. I am sure he has a perfectly valid reason for doing so. If you can help him out, click the link.

Some interesting, newly expanded webpages on DariaWiki:

  • Apocalyptic Daria: Brave New World, by Doggieboy80, a.k.a. Doggieboy (Part 7): Everyone gathered in the driveway at a little before ten. Trent shook everyone’s hand, except Daria, who he hugged briefly. “Take care of Martin,” he whispered in her left ear. “I think he likes you.” The auburn-haired teen felt a tear well up in her right eye and smiled. “I think so, too,” she whispered back. “I hope you and Pam stay happy together.”
  • Apocalyptic Daria: Scarlett's Tale, by Doggieboy80 (Part 7): Scarlett learns a lot about proper meat preparation, but she still forgets to get enough barbecue sauce beforehand.
  • Lambda, by SigDiff (Part 7): "Get up, you vile, bastard male!" Anthony DeMartino was fairly certain he had woken up in hell, until his vision cleared...
  • A Twisted Little Corkscrew, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "I hate this place," Daria grumbled as she handed over her shawl to the tuxedoed coat check boy. The youth—probably in his twenties, and already on the make, Daria thought—gave her an odd look, but said nothing. She took her claim ticket and gave him a sneer before heading into the main hall.
  • Unnamed Crossover Fanfic 1, by Pinkminx (Part 3): Daria poked the reheated lasagne that sat in a sloppy wet mess on her plate and glanced up watching the mirrored movements of her sister "Ugh this is disgusting, Mom promised she'd be home tonight for dinner, she made me cancel my date for this." She whined as she pushed her plate across the table.

  • Rings and Things That Cannot Go Together, by Ranger Thorne (continued): As a figure crashed through the wall of the training room they almost hit Jane. Jumping back as she yelled in surprise, she raised her ring toward the man pulling himself off of the floor. “Robert?” she asked the familiar figure. “Busy now,” he said, diving back into the room.
  • Something Is Rotten in the State of Lawndale, by Kristen Bealer (Part 1): Daria does Hamlet? You ain't never read great Shakespeare till you've read this! SAMPLE: Daria Hamletdorffer trudged down the stairs, feeling melancholy. Part of her unhappy mood came from the dreariness of the evening. Part of her unhappy mood came from being saddled with a last name like "Hamletdorffer."
  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Have: TGIF), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Daria meets Bill O'Reilly on FOX News. Ouch. At least it was balanced and fair.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Yaaay, Pencils!

On this great day, 151 years ago, Hymen Lipman invented the pencil with an eraser on top. Let's give him a big hand.

Okay, forget it. We'll pick this up later on.


  • Falling into College 67: How Did We Get All This Stuff? by Richard Lobinske (Part 2): Arriving home after their long drive, Daria and Jane were surprised to find a pile of boxes and luggage in the apartment. "What the hell?" Daria asked.
  • Iron Chef: No Tom: Got some good ones in here!
  • Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (continued): “Tiffany?” Stacy called out, tapping on her friend’s bedroom door. “Your mom said I should come on up, are you awake?” Stacy heard some unintelligible muttering from inside the room and pushed the door open.
  • Love Is a Series of Burning Sensations, by Undefinedlust (continued): Dragging herself from bed, Jane laughed at how appropriate the song seemed that morning. Last night, like all the nights since the previous Sunday had been a tough one. Her emotions swirled violently around feelings of despair that she would never have the woman she wanted, and a counter stream of desire that she could not push away, no matter how hard she tried.
  • Things Fall Apart, by Doggieboy (Part 5): Martin Peters streaked into the skies as fast as he could; he neither looked behind him nor tried to defend himself. When the lightning bolt struck him, however, it still came as a surprise.
  • Turnabout Confusion Part II: All The King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): "You should thank me," Kelly said. "After Thursday's fiasco, you're lucky I don't go Brooke on you." "But you're still in the Fashion Club," said Quinn. "Because Sandi hasn't seen fit to dispose of me yet," Kelly said and took a defiant bite of her pizza.
  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Drunk as a Skunk and Twice as Stunk), by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): A bit of one-upmanship between Daria and the nemesis of the free world.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

That New Kid

Eleven years ago, Ted DeWitt-Clinton appeared as Daria's potential new, first-ever boyfriend in "The New Kid." The episode stirred up a storm of controversy at the time, as not many people wanted her to hook up with him. They need not have worried. I still think Ted was gay.

Robert, however, was Daria's first real date. Not likely he'd show up on her date planner in the future, either.

Ted and Robert, however, came to be great friends. Maybe we'll see a Ted/Robert 'shipper one of these days. It could happen.

Moar l8r, stay tooned.

L8R: There's more fanfiction, but it will have to wait, got to go out for a while.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT: A well-known fan artist has generously allowed DFB2 to premiere a brand-new artwork this coming week. You MUST stay tuned for more. It is AWESOME.

Jazz.com has a note that there is a new jazz singer in the D.C. area who, if I understand the blog post correctly, looks like Daria. Here's a pic of her with The Bad Plus, the jazz group she's with. Hmmm, I dunno, we have people in the fandom who look more like Daria than she does [COUGHKristenCOUGH], but I understand the resemblance.

  • Complications, by Legendeld (Part 6): “She shows up at my house and wants to make out, then she freaks out and starts screaming for me not to touch her. I’m done with her.” He turned back to the driveway. “And I’m sending a bill for the water damage to my car.”
  • Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Chapter 2, Part 2): “You think you could dial the pep down a little?” Jane asked with a smirk. “Nope,” Stacy said, smiling broadly. “I got some good news this morning, and I’ve been up all day. Not even Mr. DeMartino could get me down.”
  • Things Fall Apart, by Doggieboy (Part 4): “We have an emergency on D-159. A very bad one, I’m afraid.” “Oh?” “A class-3 zombie outbreak. One of their DELPHI operatives is waiting for us at the office.”

Saturday, March 28, 2009

March Madness (in Fanfiction)

March Madness is upon us, and while Louisville kicks everyone's behind we will look over the new fanfics that have appeared in just the last 24 hours. I can't even get my own stories restarted because I'm typing here all evening long trying to catch up. Jeez, people, c'mon. But first, some Newz.

LET'S PLAY A GAME! Derek has suggested a fresh new take on the Daria Fandom Drinking Game. Click the link and get ready to play! At least add more rules. (SFMB version)

JennaUsername has created a very interesting portrait entitled, "If Tim Burton Created Daria." Darned if she didn't nail it.

In our art department, we also have assorted Fashion Club sketches by MDetector5. Inspiring, I'd say.

The Daria Fan Club now has 1,204 members. Outrageous.

João Paulo Costa, Richard Lobinske, Brother Grimace, Disco316, Doggieboy, Dennis, and Ajar have been hard at work on DariaWiki, raising the number of pages to 2,274 with lots of new material. Thank you! Anyone else with information to add is welcome to join in.

Brother Grimace has thrown down the iron gauntlet for an Iron Chef: Mack Mackenzie Has His Day. This one is too good to resist, but requires thought.

NEW! Roentgen has introduced Iron Chef: No Tom. How would the series have ended if Tom Sloane had not appeared? Add your $.02.

  • Harry Butthead, by Deep Metal (Part 3): NEW! “How did you manage to survive so long with a bunch of blood-sucking undead who could’ve taken your life?” asked Daria. “Oh, that,” Mr. Manners chuckled, revealing a wreath of garlic hung around his neck. “Well, it’s simple, you see. I brought protection.” “Huh huh huh! He brought protection!” “Heh heh heh heh heh!”
  • Omega Omega, by Smileyfax (Part 3): "I overreacted," Daria greeted. Her voice was hoarse and her eyes were puffy. "I couldn't accept that you weren't... my Jane. I'm sorry."

  • Apocalyptic Daria: Scarlett's Tale, by Doggieboy (Part 7): As Scarlett and John walked outside the storage units to the one he used as his own motel, she looked up at the skies. Looks like snow, she thought and shuddered. (SFMB)
  • Lambda, by SigDiff (Parts 1 to 5): NEW! Corporal Alan Watts was having a very bad day. It began just after sunrise when a fellow Resistance member burst through the door of his barracks and yelled; “WE'VE BEEN COMPROMISED, EVAC NOW!” As if to prove the speaker was not playing a practical joke, the outburst was punctuated with the wall beside his bed caving in from a guided missile. (FF.net)
  • Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (continued): Jane sighed quietly to herself and tried not to roll her eyes. For once, she was putting some effort into making the school psychologist happy. She actually had a vested interest in not getting stuck in the self-esteem class again.
  • More Apocalyptic Daria, by NightGoblyn (continued): The next morning is completely uneventful, which just goes to show that the universe is out to get me and I never get what I want. I spend the time looking for my niece and nephew, they’re old enough now to start learning the finer points of meeting and greeting all the bizarre people that show up at our gate without offending them or getting themselves shot. [NOTE: Story formerly known as "Fimbul," which was formerly known as "More Apocalyptic Daria."]
  • On the Clock, by Legendeld (Part 2): NEW! It’s been two weeks and everything has been going exactly how Daria wants it too. Between catching some of the bad guys and registering some of the rogue heroes, we’ve been busy. I almost walked when I found out about that but she swears that only we have access to the records now. One of the powers that the authorities handed over to us. Personally I don’t believe it for a second.
  • Quinn Angel, by Lawndale Lurker (COMPLETE!): “Quinn, you are looking at six counts of assault, three against police, not to mention destruction of private property and possibly inciting a riot. You could be incarcerated until you reach legal adulthood, and it could cost your father and me a huge amount of money in fines, damages, and court costs. We could lose the house. And woe be unto you if that happens." AND THEN: “Can you hear me? Quinn Angel...” sang the three Js. “Ooo...” went Quinn.
  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): "All right, by now all of you should be thoroughly acquainted with thermodynamics and Milton's Paradise Lost. O.K., if heaven's light and hell is not, explain why no work can be got out of the devil. Show your understanding of entropy. You have two hours."
  • Things Fall Apart, by Doggieboy (Part 3): “Dammit, Beavis!” Butt-Head said as the two walked down the street. The blond-haired boy carried the TV set in his hands and their progress was slow. “You aren’t moving fast enough, fartknocker!” Then the zombies showed up.
  • Turnabout Confusion, Part II: All the King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): Morning found the Morgendorffer sisters sitting across from each other at the kitchen table. Had Helen been there, she would have said they both looked emotionally drained. Had Jake been there, he would have been shoveling cereal into his face while reading the paper. As it was, both sat in silence for awhile, before Daria spoke. "You okay?" (continued here) (FF.net)
  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Mack Mackenzie Has His Day), by Brandon League (COMPLETE!): NEW! Mayor Jodie Landon-Grimace smiled benevolently out at the crowd, some 250 strong, that had gathered in the parking lot of the home offices of Bro And QB Ice Cream.
  • Unnamed story, by Roentgen (Part 1): A crossover, and an intriguing one. Can you guess what the secret added ingredient is?


Friday, March 27, 2009

Caption Contest!

Supply the dialogue between Daria and Jane in "Comments."

Thursday, March 26, 2009


The tiny picture at left balloons up wonderfully when you click on it. This is how Quinn's class viewed having Daria as their teacher in "Lucky Strike," which premiered eight years ago today. This is the episode most famous for Daria's fur bikini. Or lack thereof.

Were you aware that the name of this episode came from a brand of cigarettes? Even cartoon characters smoke Lucky Strikes. They're less likely to get cancer than we are. Maybe.

I had an idea once about Jane drawing a comic strip for the school paper featuring a puffin (kind of like a penguin, only less erotic) named Puffy, who smokes cigarettes and does television ads promoting a given cigarette brand.... until he discovers he has cancer, which the cigarette company had assured him he would not get. The comic goes into angst overdrive, with Puffy coughing up blackened parts of his lungs & cursing his fate, yet completely unable to stop smoking, until the students who smoke get riled up and begin protesting. (Burnout Girl, by the way, is a smoker. See picture #13 at that link. Mr. DeMartino smokes too, per "The Big House.")

An Iron Chef about a drunken Daria is gathering some ficlets. Contribute yours!

Daria fan Dulcinea has a PPMB thread about Sandi Griffin, and how we view her. Why are people fascinated with her? Also a good thread for contributions.

Looking for a good debate? Try Deconstructing Mack, a critical discussion of "Saint Mack" Mackenzie and how the show depicted him.


  • A Tale of Two Bungholes, by Evanilla (Part 1): Here is a very special shipper about two young boys and the girl who moved away... and then moved back. ("If only Mom knew I was spending the night at the house of the two horniest guys in Highland!”) I promise that this story will not cause permanent brain damage. I swear to God it won't. (Boinnnnng!)
  • Unnamed Crossover Fanfic, by Pinkminx (Part 2): "Look, I'm gunna drop the act. Lawndale High is a cookie-cutter replica of every other school in America, complete with your various stereotypes. No one cares about anything, the teachers are oblivious, and the principal's sole interest is to protect the *valued* name of the school. Just don't do anything to compromise the school's reputation and you'll coast through the next few years."


  • Falling into College #67: How Did We Get All This Stuff? by Richard Lobinske (Part 1): "Daria really has him whipped now," Gina said before popping a candy into her mouth.
  • Film Critic Mass, by Patrick Moore, a.k.a. Peapotmaster (Part 1): "Welcome to a special edition of Coming Attractions. Tonight, my special guest is former MTV star, Daria Morgendorffer, to co-host the show with me. Hello, Daria."
  • Lambda, by SigDiff (Part 1, restarted by popular demand!): Daria Morgendorffer didn't particularly believe in the story of Gordon Freeman. She viewed him much in the same way she viewed Santa Claus. A man fitting his general description did exist at some point, and probably did some things that were seen as amazing, but he wasn't going to be the savior of humanity. Just like how Santa Claus never brought her that damned replica human skull. [A Daria/Half-Life 2 crossover. HE'S GONNA DO IT! YESSS!]
  • Mike and the Spiral (with Jodie Landon) present: “Firecracker," by Ranger Thorne (COMPLETE!): When it comes to love she ain't no slacker / My little darlin' is a Firecracker!
  • Once Upon a Time in Lawndale, by Disco316 (Parts 6 and 7): “Didn't sleep a wink last night. A group of the most unfashionable losers in black rode herd on me all night. I didn’t think you could make black look ugly until I saw them. Well, maybe leaving them out in the desert will improve their common sense as well as their fashion sense." ALSO: "Once you've killed four, it's easy to make it five."
  • Rings and Things That Cannot Go Together, by Ranger Thorne (continued): “I am the Green Lantern of this sector of space,” Daria told him, trying to sound official. “You have been found worthy by my ring to become one of us.”
  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): "I've gone from attending Lawndale High to being a reporter for one of the lesser New York City newspapers and winding up as Imperial Grand Duchess of the Russian Empire. And I still find myself dealing with idiots, scoundrels, and assorted hostile maladjusted types."
  • Straight, Not Narrow, by Angelboy et al. (continued): "Seems like such a waste," said Daria. "The royal men are all quite handsome men." ["The Invitation" is next!]
  • Things Fall Apart, by Doggieboy (Parts 1 and 2): Bradley Buzzcut looked over the gymnasium of Highland High as the refugees settled into family groups. Blankets and sleeping bags were arranged, while the custodians pushed back the bleachers to make more floor space. He took mental stock as he looked around, but there was so many people it was hard to be sure that everyone was there. [Part 2 takes place in Ohio. Guess which city.]
  • Turnabout Confusion Part II: All The King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): "Dad said you wanted to talk to me, Mack. What about?" Now that it was upon him, he couldn't summon the anger he'd felt earlier in the day. Only sadness. "You know what about."
  • A Twisted Little Corkscrew, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): Thugs, liars, and bootlickers, she thought as she tossed the wine back. Should've brought my flask.
  • Unnamed story, by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): "Those who are one thirty-second awake are expecting me to announce that my old show will soon be available, and those one sixteenth awake are salivating at the prospect of me declaring I'm an alien and then ripping off these clothes to show a...oh, I don't know, a much more revealing outfit and nipples on my elbows."
  • Unnamed story, by SigDiff (Part 1): See if you can guess the crossover. The towel is a clue.

  • Once Bitten, Twice Shy, by Bliss Ticks: The (in)complete story, so far: "I see the snow bunnies have taken possession of your faculties again." *
* Contains adult content. Hang on.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Happy Former New Year's Day!

Today is Lady Day, which used to be the first day of the new year when the Julian calendar was being used. When everyone switched over to the Gregorian calendar, January 1 took over. I bet this caused a stir at Holiday Island High.

Anyway, here is a really interesting picture that UU sent to me. I'm not sure what to say about it, so we'll just leave it at that.

Stay tuned.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Daria and Her One True Career Goal

"Cafe Disaffecto" aired for the first time 12 years ago today. "The Lost Girls" appeared 10 years ago today. What's interesting is that in both episodes, Daria attracts attention because of her writing skills. She creates a riot in one and gives Val conniptions in the other, but it was her writing that got everything going each time. Maybe she really is destined to be "a bitter, angry hack who starts fights fistfights at cocktail parties" (The Daria Diaries). That would be wild, wouldn't it?

In fact, this idea is so interesting that I think I will start an Iron Chef thread on PPMB about it, for all you creative writers and perverts out there. Click the link and make Daria proud.

Monday, March 23, 2009


It was 11 years ago today that "Monster" premiered on MTV. We got a special peek into Daria and Quinn's childhood, plus Jane's admission that she wants to walk a poodle. And Kevin and Brittany are into The Rocky Horror Picture Show. (I'll never watch that again.)

Latest DariaWiki entry: Leaving Summer. Thanks to Richard Lobinske. Oops! Correction, it's Vlademir1, by Disco316. Correction: Oh, forget it.

SPECIAL NEWS: Remember "Daria @ Raft"? The incomplete comic strip is being discussed here on PPMB.

  • Daria's New Look, by Stevenie Ellis (Part 2): "Have a good time Kidd-" Jake cut off in the middle of his endearment when he saw his eldest daughter. Jane simply burst out laughing. “Why Daria, is that lipstick?”
  • Just Friends, by Pinkminx (Part 4): "You were half way through a bottle of vodka when I found you," Trent told Daria.
  • Unnamed Crossover Fanfic, by Pinkminx (Part 1): Daria woke before her alarm. It was the first day of the school term, and her and her sister's first day at Lawndale High. Daria felt nervous. First days at new schools never seemed to bode well with her.
  • All In the Family...Guy, by peapotmaster (Part 3): "It’s going to be one of those stupid shows where anything can happen, folks. Even in this one."
  • Complications, by Legendeld (Part 5): When the call ended, she lay back down on the bed against the male form whose arms wrapped around her as she rested her head on his chest. “Go to sleep,” he said tiredly.
  • The Fall of the Angst Lords: Rebel Without a Clue, by Gouka Ryuu (continued): “The bards entertain us, and we are the audience. If we want to hear the rest of the tale, then we need to track Gouka down and torture him until we force it out of him!” The young man grabbed a pitchfork, stuck it into one of the small fires some of the peasants had been using to keep warm, and then jumped upon to a ledge for the whole crowd to see. “It shouldn’t be hard to find the bastard! Everyone - gather your things and let’s go hear for ourselves the rest of the story!”
  • Lame Enough at Last, by Ajar (Part 1): “What are you two ladies doing over here?” “Focusing on agility, ma'am. We're focused on all the agile students around us, ma'am.” “Intense focus has indeed been maintained."
  • Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Part 5): "Don't wait up."
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes 13.5, by Brother Grimace (teaser #2): Debris flew up in a storm as a sudden down blast of wind scoured the area around Tom. He blinked the dust out of his eyes . . . and Jane was in front of him, floating a few inches over the ground. She carried a baseball bat in a loose grip in her right hand. Tom tried to give her a smile: “Oh, hi.” “Oh, hi,” Jane repeated, her tone mocking. “Go to Hell!”
  • On the Clock, by Legendeld (Part 1): She left me alone to do my work all this time and I know they must have pointed in my direction and pushed her. I have to wonder if she ever told them why she wouldn’t. Do they know that their hero is my big sister? Do they know that my abilities all came from her? Everything from hyper strength and speed to the nifty gadgets I use, all of it came from her. I can hear her approaching now. I’d know those footsteps anywhere.
  • Straight, Not Narrow, by Angelboy (Parts 1 and 2): Angelboy is making an offer you might not be able to refuse: write about Daria and Jane, the only straight chicks in Lawndale. Say what?
  • Unnamed story, by Roentgen (Part 1): Roentgen has once again put a story that MUST be continued in the wrong thread. See if you can guess the crossover. (Scissors could, I bet.)

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Water, Water, Everywhere

The U.N. has once more freshened our calendars with a holiday you never heard of, today being World Day for Water, also known in some circles as World Water Day. Sandi Griffin at left is celebrating the event as best she can. Nice necklace there.

Still not quite awake. More to come as soon as my brain kicks in.

Oh, I did see a news article about a soon-to-be (if not already) famous person who likes Daria. You might find it interesting.

Lots of new material has been added to DariaWiki. A round of applause for everyone who has enriched the website!

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Know a Poem, or Never Know 'em

Today is the U.N.-mandated World Poetry Day. You must read at least one poem today or risk the ire of the United Nations. We wouldn't want that to happen.

That was the gnuz. Now we have the fanfic report.

  • Just Friends, by Pinkminx (Parts 2 and 3): "You okay?" asked Trent. "Need a ride anywhere?" Daria sighed in defeat and nodded. Without the aid of her glasses, finding her way home would be near impossible. She walked around to the passenger side of Trent's car and slid into shotgun as Trent pulled away from the kerb.
  • Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (Part 4): “Alexander! Daria! Stop teasing your sister,” commanded Helen.

  • Amazing Cynical Fantasy #1, by Patrick Moore, a.k.a. Peapotmaster (Part 1):“Is that freak still behind us?” Todd asked Joey, as Todd fired his gun at something behind them. “Dude, it’s the misery chick from the wrestling show,” said Joey. “How can she follow us?”
  • Apocalyptic Daria: Brave New World, by Doggieboy (Part 7): “I thought that Aunt Amy was an art appraiser,” Daria said. “So did I,” Helen said and sighed. “It appears that there’s more to Amy than meets the eye.” (SFMB)
  • Knockin on Heaven's Gate, by HeirOfNorton (Part 3): I can't believe my parents made me go to that freakshow. First my geeky sister has a thing, which could totally ruin my reputation before I even get started if anyone knows she's related to me, and then she has to go and announce it of front of the whole school, when she's just trying to get get me stigmatamized or whatever, anyone can see it.
  • Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (continued): “Mouthy bitch,” the man snarled, drawing a knife from under his coat. “We’ll see how much you talk when your throat’s cut.”
  • Quinn Angel, by Lawndale Lurker (continued): Charles Ruttheimer, approaching from the opposite direction, turned to watch her go. “R-r-r-r-r-r-r, feisty!” he gurgled, followed instantly by “Ow!”
  • Rings and Things That Cannot Go Together, by Ranger Thorne (continued): Jane was holding a cup of coffee when Daria landed in her back yard. “That the real stuff or that super-duper coffee you can make?” her friend asked. “Real,” Jane replied. “For some reason this ring only makes decaf. You ready to go trolling for lanterns?”
  • Study Break, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Mack makes a simple observation about adult eating habits.
  • Turnabout Confusion, Part II: All the King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): "Go ahead," Mack said. "Take a swing, and I'll take you apart. Then Evan, Taylor, and Joey will each take a turn."

More to come.

Caption Contest

And your caption is....

Friday, March 20, 2009


Five years ago today, in another Dariaverse, Private Quinn Louise Morgendorffer was killed in action in Iraq. Her story is here. Thank you, Guy. We will all remember you.

In the real world, "The Story of D" premiered eight years ago yesterday.

I'm still looking through the flipbooks that reappeared on MTV's Daria website (see yesterday's post). Awesome. Someone at MTV looked out for us. Thanks! and thanks to you, UU, for finding out.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Day for a Goddess

Thousands of years ago today, today was the Quinquatria, a Roman holiday celebration in honor of Minerva, goddess of wisdom and warfare. How this came to have Quinn's name in it instead of Daria's, no one knows.

Okay, more later. Stay tuned. Don't go away. Ciao.

BREAKING NEWS: UU has informed me that all of the flipbooks on MTV's Daria site now work. I tried them, and he is correct. THEY WORK! MORE INFO!

Here are the links he sent to me. UU totally rules.

http://www.mtv.com/onair/daria/encyclop ... rmed.jhtml


http://www.mtv.com/onair/daria/encyclop ... ward.jhtml

http://www.mtv.com/onair/daria/chapter2 ... ored.jhtml


http://www.mtv.com/onair/daria/chapter3 ... tive.jhtml

Thank you, UU, and thank you, MTV.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

The Day After (or, Late Again)

GOOD NEWS: It appears this blog is not under a ban anymore. Hooray! Okay, enough celebrating, on with the rest of the news.

Yesterday, in addition to being St. Pat's Day, was also:
  • The 12th anniversary of the first airing of "College Bored."
  • The 10th anniversary of the first airing of "Daria Dance Party."
  • The 9th anniversary of the first airing of "Murder, She Snored."
Quinn gives us the official send-off in her green-for-Saint-Pat's outfit (at right), and now for the fanfiction.

  • Daylight: Remember When the Music, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): Trent Lane sat alone in the ruins of McGrundy's cradling his treasure. He'd carried it with him since the day the sun's fire came. In many ways, it was it had been all that kept him tethered to life. A moment's peace, a brief relief from the hell that life had become.
  • Lawndale’s Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Part 1): “You must be Miss Lane,” she said, walking across the room with one arm still around Quinn, “I’m Quinn’s sister, Daria.”
  • Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (continued): “Well, you are definitely keeping your Stalker-fu skills finely honed,” commented Alex after a pause, with a raised an eyebrow at his friend.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

One next-to-last wee bit of Irishness

Had to get Tiffany's leprechaun picture in here somewhere. What would she say about this outfit? What would Daria say? What about Upchuck?

Just had a thought: wouldn't it be great if this was the love-child of Daria and Saint Patrick's Day?

Moar soon. Assuming this blog isn't deleted, which Google has threatened to do. Whatever. That would be the perfect thing for this day, wouldn't it?

NEWS: Lawndale Online reports a problem with fanfiction submissions is being worked on. Only shorter stories can be posted until then. Stay tuned.

Who's wearing green today?

Does Daria wear emerald to celebrate her Irish heritage? Do wild bears really use toilet paper in the woods? Some of us wear green because there's nothing left to wear that isn't dirty, but Daria wears it because it fits her mood, which is to say, she doesn't give a damn.

Wonder if Daria will meet Saint Patrick's Day when she's in college at her first kegger. What kind of kid would they have nine months later? Would SPD pay child support in shamrocks? Jane could run off with Guy Fawkes Day, and all they would have are more Lanes, exactly like the previous batch.

NOTE: Still waiting for the "spam blog blocker" to stop interfering with the fun. More l8r.

Something I bet most of you have never seen before....

Poor Mr. DeMartino. Click here to hear him in person.

Happy St. Patrick's Day to everyone. Hope you have a very pleasant (green) day.

P.S. This post was supposed to have been published earlier today (much earlier), but for some reason Google's robots decided this was a spam blog. I have no idea what that is, but it is of course bad, since it has the word "spam" in it. I am waiting for the blog to be unblocked, which might take a while. Sorry for the wait.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Woof Woof

Ten years ago today, believe it or not, "That Was Then, This Is Dumb" first aired. At right is the great dog hero Leary (the Third), bane of squirrels everywhere.

This episode spawned a lot of fanfiction. Some examples, in no special order:
Interesting to imagine what else could be written. Where might it be taken?

Latest DariaWiki page: U.S. Marshals Service, by Brother Grimace. Lots of new pages in addition!

  • John Lane 39: Leaving Summer, by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): Alison said, "I'm not going to forget your offer…when you turn 18." Daria's cheeks reddened at the comment, but she maintained her composure. "A promise is a promise."
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Special—Tokusatsu Team Up! by Lorenzo Sauchelli (Part 3): The Planeswalker grimaced when her counterpart teleported back to Japan. “I was hoping it would take you longer to get back from Alpha Centauri.”

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Not a Good Day If Your Name Is Caesar

Today is the Ides of March, and on Holiday Island the character named for this date is still in juvenile lockup after the events in this fanfic.

More later when I figure out what I'm doing. Meanwhile, here is a picture of Jane Lane smelling her armpit.

THIS JUST IN: Daria is now leader of the Legion of Lawndale Heroes. Upchuck is deputy leader. More to come after the rioting settles down.

BREAKING NEWS: Two big website updates on the Ides of March!

Outpost Daria has added great new stuff, and Sick, Sad World is back in business, too!!!


New Fanfiction
  • FBCB, by Wraith (Part 3): The great saga continues as the Fashion Club meets its greatest challenge yet! Here's a sample: "Look, I can't give you anything until you fill out requisition form 29B/1919." "But that thing is twelve pages long!" "In triplicate too. Press hard."
  • Locker Trouble, by im thinking changing myname (?) (COMPLETE!): A little slash before bedtime.
  • Quinn Angel, by Lawndale Lurker (continued): Helen looked up as Daria reentered the kitchen. She'd been making notes on a legal pad, Daria saw, and violently scratching out some of them. The level of liquid in the Southern Comfort bottle was lower, too.
  • Turnabout Confusion, Part II: All The King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): Andrea cracked a fishnetted knuckle. "What do you think?" Ted considered carefully for a moment. "I think that Scarlett's ideas are unsound, and I don't think I wish to be a party to them." "Unsound," Andrea chuckled. "You could say that. You could also say crazy."

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Dead Reckoning

A new page was added to DariaWiki that cries out for more examples. If you know of good ghost stories in Daria fanfiction, please add them to that page.

In addition, if you know of good horror stories in this fandom that were missed on that DariaWiki page, please add those as well. You are free, as usual, to add your own comments and evaluations, too. The more, the merrier.

Brainy Quinn Loves Pi Day

Today is Pi Day, as all mathematically inclined people know. Everything you need to know about Daria and Pi Day was explained in an earlier post, so I won't repeat it here.

Latest entry in DariaWiki: Daria IRC Chatroom. João Paulo Costa, Disco316, Brother Grimace, Vlademir1, Quiverwing, BlackHole, and Ranger Thorne have added great stuff to this resource. You might also want to look over the page on Horror, which has finally been expanded.

More online praise of Daria, this time from Entertainment Weekly.com. Interesting article. Daria on Bachelorette? This sounds like an Iron Chef challenge.

Here is a really weird news item for you. Another Daria alumnus does good.... I think.

Need to work on Backgrounders this weekend and write another fanfic chapter. L8r.

[This blog entry will expand unpredictably within the next 24 hours. Stay tuned.]

[First part:] Echopapa is sending up a trial balloon on PPMB for an idea called "X-23." Respond to it, if you dare.

  • Apocalyptic Daria: Brave New World, by Doggieboy (Part 6): Odell Jones sat in the driver’s seat of his minivan and hummed along with an Elvis Presley song as it played on the CD player. Sun’s out, good song from the King, a beautiful piece in the back, and all I need to totally make my day is one good “sale." (SFMB)
  • Complications, by Legendeld (Part 4): “I need to get laid. If something doesn’t happen soon, my wrist is going to end up in a sling.”
  • Daylight: Falling from Grace: I Should Have Been Home Yesterday, by Disco316 (Part 1): “West Virginia! We made it!” rang the cheery voice of Quinn Morgendorffer. Quinn’s voice betrayed none of the hardship she had to endure over the last month. “It’s about freaking time,” added Sandi Griffin.
  • Love Is a Series of Burning Sensations (ex-Accidents Will Happen), by Undefinedlust (Part 4): Sometimes unicorns have to die... wait, where have I heard that one before?
  • Other Side, by Legendeld (COMPLETE!): “They are the machine Hands. Those that worked in the world to ensure the Engines were obeyed.” Daniel answered Jane’s question concerning what the men were. “But they were all destroyed.”
  • Quinn Angel, by Lawndale Stalker/Lurker (continued): “You succeeded, Daria! My life is over! But I’m taking you with me! You hear me, Daria? You’re dead!”
  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): Daria reflected on how much her father had deteriorated since that day when Link, dressed in a squirrel suit and lederhosen, attacked her family. In a few seconds his tenuous grip on sanity finally slipped away.

Friday, March 13, 2009

That Time of the Month Again

It's Friday the 13th. Check your car for signs of paranormal activity.

The list of complete and incomplete Daria fanfiction for 2009 has been posted!

More soon, have to get some sleep.



Thursday, March 12, 2009

We regret to report...

News has reached the fandom that Guy "Decelaraptor" Payne passed away today. He was a brilliant, funny, and warm-hearted writer, and everyone who knew him says that he was even better in person. His passing is a loss to the entire fandom.

Tributes and condolences may be left at the above link (SFMB) or on PPMB.

A Grizzly Tale About Summer Camp

Just eight years ago, "Camp Fear" made its debut on MTV. This episode produced one of the best lines ever spoken in the series. (Jesse: "You know, if a shark doesn't keep swimming, it just stands still.") Other than that, though, many fans are not terribly fond of it... except as fodder for AU tales. Richard Lobinske did "Daylight: Visiting Camp Grizzly," NightGoblyn did "The Misery Chicks," and there was that Outers thing. Kristen Bealer wrote the perfect prequel, too.

How else could "Camp Fear" have been different? How could it have been better? No one to my knowledge has yet written an AU of "Camp Fear" simply to remove some of the disliked aspects of the original episode and add their own suggestions (not without adding SF elements, that is).

That's something worth writing about in Comments, below. Don't write the story, just say how you think it could have been better or different. Maybe someone will pick up on it for a great fanfic later.

Newest page on DariaWiki: Danny. Newest artwork on PPMB: Daria as the Green Lantern, by Ranger Thorne.

  • Daria and Jane Go to the Moon, by Echopapa (Part 4): "C'mon, Jane, I'm dyin' here!" Daria huffed. "Can't we take a break?"
  • Not-Quite-Forever Girl, by Alpacca Jo, a.k.a. thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): Just as she turned to walk away, a voice called her back to the present.
  • Omega Omega, by Smileyfax (Part 2): "Jane, I found something unusual in the attic..."

  • Acts of Cupidity, by Disco316 (COMPLETE!): Quinn’s eyes bugged out a bit. “You were able to snag Mack? Daria, I’m... I’m proud of you!”
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes GT 1:1—West Texas Walkabout, by Roentgen (Part 1): It all started when my best friend Jane got into an argument with Tom before we left. Oddly enough, it was an argument about Jane’s red jacket.
  • A New Set of Rules, by Dennis (Part 7): “Whatever, Daria,” Kevin said, taking a step back. Daria couldn't tell if he was making way for her or getting away from her, but nonetheless, she crossed the threshold. “Your room again?” He nodded and led her upstairs. They were soon hard at work.
  • Rings and Things That Cannot Go Together, by Ranger Thorne (Part 2): “Let me be certain I’m hearing this correctly,” the senior Ringbearer, an older man with the name Alfred Pennyworth said from one side of the table to Daria on the other. “You say that this,” he gestured to the lantern sitting on the table, “came to your Earth from a distance reality that we haven’t yet discovered?” [See also the ongoing discussion over background issues. Interesting.]
  • Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (continued): Each of the girls and especially Trent couldn't help but notice the unmistakable flash of bare tanned backside as Brittany's skirt was caught for a moment by the wind as she ran to Kevin's Jeep.
  • Jane, Where's My Car? by thatLONERchick (Part 1): "Wow," Daria uttered quietly. "That's a lot of pudding."

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Caption Contest!

(Put your choice of caption in the Comments.)

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

It was grrrrrr-REAT!!

"The Invitation" aired twelve years ago today, "Depth Takes a Holiday" (a favorite of mine) aired ten years ago exactly, and "A Tree Grows in Lawndale" nine years ago. Time flies by, whether you like it or not.

Moar soon. Okay, it's soon now.

  • Just Friends, by Pinkminx (Part 1): She sighed heavily and drained the remainder of her Corona, tossing the empty bottle in the makeshift bin beside her. It hit the bottom of the can with a hollow thunk signifying its solitude. She turned and sat against the roof's edge.

Monday, March 9, 2009

I Don't. Do You?

Eleven years ago, "I Don't" made its first appearance on MTV and won the hearts of many fans for its loving take on the institution of marriage. Alas, people still get married today, so obviously the lesson was not learned.

A lot of pictures have been added to some of the characters on Backgrounders. Did you know that Burnout Chick smokes? She was caught in the act in "Jake of Hearts," smoking in the school parking lot.

More as soon as I figure out what I'm doing.

Okay, here's some gnuz. Have Daria shippers run out of unique combinations of possible lovers? This Iron Chef says, hell no!

A preview of "Apocalyptic Daria: Brave New World," Part 6, is being offered by Doggieboy on PPMB. Read and tremble.

  • Acts of Cupidity, by Disco316 (Part 8): Mr. O’Neill sighed. “Brittany, do you know about Utopia?” Brittany twirled her hair around her right index finger. “Um, isn’t that the juice drink they’re serving in the cafeteria?”

Sunday, March 8, 2009

A Very Special Mother-Daughter Moment

Had to give one this its own blog post.

  • John Lane 39: Leaving Summer, by Richard Lobinske (Part 3): "Mom got a little carried away in reminiscing about the past and… I don't think I can ever look at a banana split the same way again."

A Surprise Note from PPMB

Internal Server Error

The server encountered an internal error or misconfiguration and was unable to complete your request.

Please contact the server administrator, webmaster@thepaperpusher.net and inform them of the time the error occurred, and anything you might have done that may have caused the error.

More information about this error may be available in the server error log.

Additionally, a 404 Not Found error was encountered while trying to use an ErrorDocument to handle the request.

Guess we'll have to wait a little before it gets sorted out.

Oh, Thee of Little Faith

Outside of the episode "Groped by an Angel", the subject of religion and faith was rarely, if ever, addressed. Secondarily, a Christmas tree could be seen in the garage on a couple occasions, such as in "Camp Fear."

Daria declares that she is an agnostic and we know that the Morgendorffers certainly do not attend any regular services. Now it's your turn to have fun with wild speculation on what you think/consider/imagine/hallucinate the religious preferences of different characters to be.


Today is International Women's Day, saith the United Nations, so if you are a women, or you know someone who is a women, or used to be a women, whatever, this is your day. More power to you and your women thing.

  • Daria and Jane Go to the Moon, by echopapa (Part 3): The microgravity coach turned to the intercom to tell the pilot that her students were ready. Daria checked her seat harness. She and Jane were strapped in the back of the plane, along with Charles Ruttheimer III.
  • Omega Omega, by Smileyfax (Part 1): "Daria, don't be alarmed if I'm not home when you wake up. I have some errands to run that might keep me out past sunset, but if they do I'll just stow away at the high school like I used to a few months ago. I'll be back tomorrow. Hugs and kisses, Jane." ["The Omega Jane" meets "Illusions." Hang on.]
  • Acts of Cupidity, by Disco316 (Part 7): “No thanks. If I want a guy later on, I’m fairly certain I can get him interested the old fashioned way.” “Just make sure you’re not flashing your chest in the direction of one of Ms. Li’s cameras.”
  • Complications, by Legendeld (Part 3): “You aren’t exactly small in that department, Daria. I take full credit for you and your sister’s breast size.”
  • Other Side, by Legendeld (Part 9): Daria pushed against the wall of flesh that was holding her back from the front door of Daniel’s home. “Get out of my way, Daniel.”
  • Turnabout Confusion Part II: All The King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): "Oh, my sun-haired fantasy," Upchuck leered. "My heard breaks at your rejection. But I note the absence of our esteemed grammarian and literary guide. I thought maybe you had seen him?"

Saturday, March 7, 2009


Super-alert fan UU has discovered a webpage that I was unaware of, listing the makes of all cars that have appeared in various TV shows and movies, including Daria. The Daria page of the Internet Movie Cars Database is a wonder to behold. Thank you, UU, and thanks to everyone who has contributed to that resource!

Note that the mysterious yellow car seen at the beginning of "The Big House" is also identified.

Trent's car, from "Jane's Addition," is at right.

Note some disagreements between what is on the IMCDB and a similar page on Outpost Daria, to which D. T. Dey, I (TAG), and others contributed.

BREAKING NEWS! Actually it's a little old, but one of the old Daria WebRings has been rebooted. I found out just recently when looking at DariaWiki. The Other Daria Webring leads to a number of different fan sites. Give 'er a try, and thanks to the RingMaster!

Spring Ahead, or Stay in Bed

Set your clocks ahead one hour tonight, those of you in the U.S.

Sort of busy this morning dealing with house issues, will write more here soon on a more Daria-ish topic.

EXTRA NOTE: Lorenzo Sauchelli has posted a preview of Part 3 of Legion of Lawndale Heroes Special: Tokusatsu Team Up!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Friday Night Fever! Boogie-Oogie-Oogie!

Sorry, I ran out of ideas for what to put in this post. Anyway, here's a quick fanfic update.

  • Girls Together Sarcastically: Impersonal Venus, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): Daria, leaning on the bar with a Sam Adams behind her, sighed. We've got to get a demo. She understood the importance of communicating with fans, but she still had no patience for idle chitchat and preferred to have more than her personality to offer. (FF.net)
  • I'll Be Damned... And You Along With, by Psychotol (Part 1): "Where did you come from?" he asked. "It's hot, it's fiery, it sucks for an eternity. And you apparently want to send someone there." "Oh, you're her. Hell Girl."
  • Long Trek Home, by Ranger Thorne (continued): “Captain, I’m afraid we have a problem.” He looked at the girl. “And her name is Helen.”
  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): "Damn! Daria, when are we going to get out of Contropolis? These damned squirrels are coming from everywhere and you know that running over thousands of these gray furry rodents is not good for your tires."
Moar shortly. But first, this bulletin: Dennis, Brother Grimace, Disco316, João Paulo Costa, Richard Lobinske, Gouka Ryuu, Drmike, Roentgen, and Doggieboy have been burning the lamp oil (i.e., staying up late) to add more stuff to DariaWiki. U r0kk!! If you have something to post, please help out!

Caption Contest

Put your caption in Comments.

Thursday, March 5, 2009


While I was off in la-la land for the last two days, I missed some very important anniversaries for the fandom. You may suggest appropriate punishments for me in the Comments section below.

Anyway, this evening I will post the fandom holidays I missed in this work-in-progress post for the DFB2, plus all the new fanfiction, fan art, and fan et cetera that's been around. Here we go.

The 12th anniversary of the premiere of Daria itself, "Esteemsters," was two days ago. That day was also the 10th anniversary of "The Old and Beautiful" and the 9th anniversary of "Antisocial Climbers."

Yesterday was the 9th anniversary of an event that took place in a Daria fanfic spinning off from "Fizz Ed." Guess it?

Today is the eight anniversary of the premiere on MTV of "Fat Like Me."

That about covers the missed anniversaries. More anniversaries will be missed next week. Now for the news.

Enough of that. Now for the new fanfiction. In a minute.

  • 1800DARIA, by Smileyfax (Part 1): Jane was hunched over laughing on the couch. "Daria, you HAVE to be pulling my leg. You do NOT work at a porn hotline." "Not anymore."
  • Falling into College, Year 4: Christmas in White, by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): This is the only complete story in this listing. That means you are required by law to read it.
Lawndale Online
  • Dennis has posted the stories from his Girls Together Sarcastically series. Check 'em out.
  • Accidents Will Happen, by undefinedlust (Part 3 finished): "Oh really?" Alison's voice perked with interest. "What's up babe?"
  • Acts of Cupidity, by Disco316 (Parts 5 and 6): It being Saturday Night, Valentine’s Day went to his usual starting point, the Zon. He didn’t figure to find too many people he was looking for there, but it was as good a place to start as any. As he canvassed the room, he found two of the people he’d been looking for; unfortunately, they weren’t what anyone would consider a couple.
  • The Exile Papers, by Gene (Parts 1-13): I hate this tent. It's smelly and cold. When Janie brought me sandwiches, she also brought a couple of quilts. She's as thoughtful as can be while Wind and Penny are just jerks. I won't say what I'm thinking of Mom right now. Too tied up with her art projects to say anything about what's going on around the house.
  • John Lane 39: Leaving Summer, by Richard Lobinske (Part 2): BEST LINE BEGGING FOR AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE: "It's not like you were a bad kisser or anything." [Two stories featuring Alison? Whoa.]
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Special: Tokusatsu Team Up! by Lorenzo Sauchelli (continued): The red dragon-like monster the five robots were battling looked like it belonged in a Godzilla movie. It towered over every building in the area, and its wings gave the impression that the monster had the ability to swallow all of Tokyo in a few bites.
  • A Merry Invitation, by TheSecretSharer (Part 1): Daria as Shakespeare wouldst have done it. Rox yr sox.
  • The Other, by TAG (Parts 1 to 7): They that are born on Halloween will see more than other folk.
  • Size Does Matter, by BlackHole (Part 38): With a bowl of ‘Model Cereal’ in her hand, a glass of orange juice on the table in front of her, a pajama and bathrobe clad Quinn lounged in front of the big living room TV while the noon news interrupted the procession of the Sunday morning series. Quinn contemplated the motions required to reach for the remote and change the channel, but decided that skipping the news wasn’t worth the effort. (SFMB)
  • Turnabout Confusion, Part II: All the King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): "Ms. Morgendorffer," Ms. Li said, "I know for a fact that you have been plotting with Mr. DeMartino to undermine my authority in this school. Now if you confessed your crime, I may be moved to be lenient." She loomed over Daria, her voice barely above a whisper. "You do not want to find out what will happen to you if I am not lenient."
  • Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (continued): Quinn’s eyes went wide at the sound of her sister’s angry voice. She turned slowly to find Daria standing behind her with arms crossed and an expression that matched the older girl’s tone.
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