Saturday, January 31, 2009

Anniversaries I missed thanks to the damn ice storm

This past Wednesday, January 28th, was the seven anniversary of a very special wedding in Daria fanfic-land. Who got hitched? Give up? Click here for the answer.

That same day was also the 50th anniversary of Lego toy bricks, which can be used to create a very good likeness of Jake Morgendorffer, shown at left.

Thursday, January 29th, was the 14th anniversary of Daria's appearance on the Beavis and Butt-head episode, "Wet Behind the Rears." Daria doesn't speak in the episode, but you see her having a good laugh, along with the rest of the student body, when Beavis and Butt-head are forced to leave school during a fire drill wearing only their underwear. Plus Beavis is covered in blood and has a hole in his right hand from being hit with a javelin. Plus, you discover at the end, the fire alarm was rigged by the principal and Coach Buzzcut for the sole purpose of having Beavis and Butt-head embarrassed in front of the rest of the school. Which really makes you wonder what the hell was going on in that school. Jeez. At least Daria got a good laugh out of it. So did both Kimberlys and Cassandra.

Plus, it was nine years ago on Friday the 30th that part of the episode "Fizz Ed" took place. It was Super Bowl Sunday in the year 2000, when Daria took on The System and won. More or less. Thanks to Richard Lobinske for puzzling this one out.

Lorenzo Sauchelli has drawn another Legion of Lawndale Heroes super-dude. Enjoy!

Greystar has posted a special PPMB Iron Chef challenge. Stay tuned to see where this ones goes.

SPECIAL NEWS! Roentgen (here, too) has created a DariaWiki page with all the links to the Legion of Lawndale Heroes stories! Huzzah! This was a much-needed item. Thank you!

The New Idea Thread on PPMB continues to spiral out of control. Many exciting projects are also being discussed for 2009.

More later as I read some more stuff. Oh, and the stories I missed updating are below.
  • Daria, Poem Unlimited: The Meme Wars, by Project Pegasus (Part 2): Tom is at it again! This time he is trying to take over the Internet, and only Daria and Jane can stop him! While Daria and Jane desperately chase Tom across Cyber Space, they find themselves stuck in yet another Internet meme!
  • Harry Butthead, by Deep Metal (Part 2): “Butt-head, I’m very disappointed in you! We wanted to raise you in an upright, Christian household and this is how you repay us? With black magic and occultism?” [This story was in the B&B forum, but it includes Daria, so is listed here.—TAG]
  • Helping Hand, by Ivgie Sole (Part 3): Having already suffered a great loss Daria is about to lose her love, sanity and perhaps her very life. That is until an old friend comes to her rescue.
  • When It Rains, by MandeeMistress (Part 1): Daria is finally getting the tour of Raft that she wanted. A placement test is her main objective. With Trent, Jane and Jesse along for the ride, it's bound to be a disaster.

  • Expectavi—Daria: Agent of COBRA, by Ranchoth (Part 2.5): OMG. Don't try this at home, kids. *
  • Falling into College 66: Christmas in White, by Richard Lobinske (Part 4): It appears the truck filled with ebola-carrying penguins is not going to make it to the wedding, but there's always the honeymoon!
  • Long Trek Home, by Ranger Thorne (Part 2 continued): Daria sighed then sat in one of the seats across from Jodie. "This is just too weird to talk to Jane about," she admitted. "But, I, um, think that girl's father might be me."
  • Other Side, by Legendeld (Part 7): “The boiler is fine but it looks like the exchanger is cracked and that’s why it can’t build up more pressure to turn the turbine fast enough to make this thing go faster than five miles per hour.”
  • Snuffed Animals, by Disco316 (Parts 13 to 16): Everyone's on the road not previously taken. Stay tuned to see where the road ends and if there are any fatalities.
  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): Daria and Jane meet... uh-oh. This can't end well.
  • Turnabout Confusion, Part II: All the King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): There aren't enough shocked little yellow emoticons in all TEH INTERNETZ to fit my reaction to this plot development.
  • Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (Chapter 3, Part 7): “I can’t believe we missed the sale by an hour,” Quinn said with an annoyed tone as she dropped her keys on the living room table. Joey, Jeffie and Jamie each filed slowly through the front door a minute later. Each was encumbered with numerous bags, bundles and parcels of various sizes and visibly struggled to hold onto their immense burdens.
* Contains mature content. Brace yourself.

Back Again

Last Wednesday morning about 5:50 a.m. ET, the power went out in my neighborhood (thanks to a monstrous ice storm) and didn't come back until sometime this morning. We lived in a nearby hotel in the meanwhile, a hotel that had a public computer that was so slow it made Tiffany Blum-Deckler look like an amphetamine junkie. No updates possible.

So, anyway, I'm back online. Don't expect anything much from me for a bit, still trying to catch up with whatever went on while I was away.

Good to be here.

Thursday, January 29, 2009


Time is running out to vote for the 2008 Daria Fanworks Awards. Give a nod of thanks for your favorite works of the year.

And don't worry, none of the vote counters live in Minnesota! :)

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Story Vs. Technique

Writing is a craft involving both creative and technical aspects. Optimal, of course, is an excellent story, excellently told. However, particularly when reading fan fiction, one must at times be willing to forgive, at least to a point, weaknesses in one area or another. Even in the Daria fandom. Yes, Daria fans are smarter than everyone else, and yes, all our writers (well, maybe not Ronin) are a cut above the writers from other fandoms, but we still have some things to overlook when it comes to the stories. (If you are a Daria writer, of course this doesn’t mean your stories. You are the exception.)

Sometimes it’s broken rules. Yes, writing has rules. Spelling, grammar, punctuation. These things matter.

Sometimes it’s a weakness in the story. Poorly conceived, poorly plotted, poor characterization. Or even just not a good story, at least for some. Not every story can appeal to every reader.

Sometimes, it’s a corker of a story, or at least it could be, it’s just not written well. Good ideas suffer when poorly executed.

Even when a story isn’t particularly appealing, if well told, I still quite enjoy it. I can also overlook a number of weaknesses in technique if the story is good. There is, however, a tipping point, when a story becomes unreadable. This might vary. For example, I was completely unable to read one story that was recommended to me because of the flagrant abuse of italics. The story may have been fabulous, but I could not read it.

What’s your tipping point?

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Story Time

NightGoblyn has brought up the issue of what everyone is working on for 2009. Join in the conversation. Bring a pitchfork, too.


A Day That Will Live in Fame-y

HISTORY IN ACTION! A mere 189 years ago, the Russians discovered Antarctica, a deed for which I will always be grateful for reasons that cannot be discussed in a public forum on the orders of my attorney.

This is post #991 here on the DFB2. In a few short days, we will enter a new millennium of blog posting, an epoch marked by yet still more posting, and then even more. I'm trying to think of something to add to that but it isn't coming to mind. Some kind of bold exclamation in French, maybe. Something. Duh.

Two years from today, someone important in Daria fanfiction will be born. Who is it? The answer lies within the first few paragraphs here.

Monday, January 26, 2009

No, not her, either.

Linda Griffin, though she has a kind of an aggressive guy attitude, enjoys positions of power over other women, engages in constant games of oneupmanship, and knows how to properly shoot a bow and arrow, is not a lesbian. She's just Sandi Griffin, grown up, and Sandi isn't a lesbian, either. Ain't happenin', sorry.

For the shocking answer as to who on Daria was an actual real no-kidding lesbian, click here. Be prepared to be amazed, because there was more than one!

S'trewth! It's Australia Day, Mate!

It is indeed Australia Day, when we celebrate all things Australian, like 'roos in the top paddock (seen here in an image from Animal Pervert. I mean, Planet).

It is also the new Chinese New Year, forgot which animal (kangaroos, probably, but I can't translate 農曆新年), and the birthday of that wacky talk-show icon Ellen DeGeneres, whose fans cannot for some reason stop talking about whether Daria is a lesbian. My gosh, you'd think they were Daria fans too or something. Ellen is 51.

More soon, not with it yet, but not quite as not with it as I was yesterday, when I wasn't with it at all.

MOAR: I've been reading over the list of cartoon-oriented people that Ellen's fans think are lesbians. Good Lord! Wilma Flintstone and Betty Rubble? Buttercup? DORA THE EXPLORA? Damn, people!

Mindful that it is almost the end of January and we haven't yet talked about Helen Morgendorffer's prize-winning breasts, we will devote a little space here to talking about Who on Daria Do You Think Is Most Likely to Be a Lesbian, and Why. You can talk about as many characters as you want, but you have to pick your Main Choice.

IMPORTANT NOTE: You cannot bring up Daria and Jane. They've been done to death. Forget 'em. ALSO cannot bring up Alison, who came right out and said she was bi. Forget her, too.

As for the ones I don't think are lesbians or had any sort of lesbianical experiences:
  • Helen Morgendorffer. With all apologies to a certain fan whose initials are BG, Helen was straight right out of the gate. She wants the Big Jake. Constantly.
  • Brittany Taylor. Despite that wild tactical routine in "The Daria Hunter," nope. Never even crosses her tiny but well-meaning mind as she humps her merry way through every guy in Lawndale County.
  • Janet Barch. Despite her martial-arts ass-kicking on DeMartino in "The New Kid," nope. Never even crosses her mind. She wanted a Mushy Banana Male of her own, for which all lesbians everywhere can be thankful.
My pick? (see next post)

Sunday, January 25, 2009

A Power Behind the Melody

Even though Daria's fictional character Melody Powers was only mentioned twice during the show, in Season 1's "Café Disaffecto" and Season 3's "The Old and the Beautiful", the idea has generated a lot of material for fanfiction, from the obvious of Daria writing "Melody" as a plot element to the inclusion of actual Melody stories, the best example of which is Galen Hardesty's "Blood Oath of Patriots" series.

Since both episodes include the ending of their respective Melody stories, it is clear that Daria wrote at least two of them. The "Café Disaffecto" story ended with:

Daria - Safe for democracy, or almost safe. Melody brushed some errant grains of sand off her fingers, tied her top back on and reached into her beach bag. Tonio heard nothing, and that was a pity, because he would never hear anything again. So long Tonio, she thought as she calmly stood up. I could have loved you if you weren't as red as the blood stain now spreading across the sand.

(Mr. O’Neill hides face in hands)

Daria - Melody walked calmly away toward the hotel, there’d be a message there from HQ no doubt. She hoped she had time to shower.

While "The Old and the Beautiful" with:

Daria - "Melody Powers sighed as she began picking what was left of Misha out of her hair. She'd look into less aggressive explosives back at HQ after her rendezvous with Team Algiers and the intriguing Eduard. 'I hope he's the strong, silent type,' she thought, flicking away one of Misha's molars. 'I've already had one man go to pieces on me today.'"

Though riffing off of the contemporary movie, "Austin Powers", the character and stories are not comedies, but instead are satires of the spy genre with over-the-top body counts like an episode of "24".

Daria - As Melody sun-bathed on the Rio beach, she looked back upon the past few days with a certain quiet satisfaction: twelve dead Russians, five dead Chinese, three or four dead Cubans. The world was once again safe for democracy, she reflected while watching Tonio's exquisite chest rise and fall with his light snoring.

Come to think of it, it makes you wonder how Daria would write Melody meeting Jack Bauer. Hmm, since I'm feeling a little lazy today, that's your homework assignment. How would Melody Powers react to Jack Bauer. Write a short bit here or if it's something longer, take it over to one of our regularly scheduled message boards.

G'morning. Not Awake Yet.

Nothing on the DariaScope this morning. Check back in a while to see what's new.


LATE NEWS! Most recent updates on DariaWiki: David Allen Farrington, by Brother Grimace; Size Does Matter, by BlackHole; and Ted DeWitt-Clinton, by João Paulo Costa & Disco316. Thank you!
  • The Almond Ninjas! by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Stacy Rowe has joined Jake Morgendorffer in his battle against the evil squirrels, and now they know it!
  • Death from Above, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): From the "1,001 Ways To Kill Tom Sloane" thread on PPMB comes this quickfic, where Tom gets into a sticky wicket for the final time... and boy, is it sticky!
  • Her Little Secret, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Janet Barch has found a way to ease the stress of her life. It's nothing like you'd ever expect, though... not in a million years.
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: Dinner, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): The empty nest syndrome hits the Morgendorffer household hard.
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: For The Boys at Camp Victory, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Daria does a good thing for the United States Marine Corps. Semper fi, boys!
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: Fraternity Brothers, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): While at USAES for training with the rest of the Legion, Tom Sloane rooms with a past acquaintance... who is not entirely happy to see him.
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: Legionnaires 101, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): The Legion's competition at the United States Academy of Extranormal Studies (the team known as The Alliance) takes a moment to study the Legionnaires. Takes place before Legion of Lawndale Heroes 12.6.
  • Origins of the Ringbearers: Michael by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Based on the Ringbearers concept from Daria fanfiction, this multi-part fic deals with a man in a world like Daria's and yet different, as he tries to atone for a lifetime of wrongs.

  • Complications, by Legendeld (Part 1): “At least he isn’t a stunt car driver," said Helen. "I don’t know what about those kind of men that makes level-headed girls just lose their minds.”
  • Falling Into College 66: Christmas in White, by Richard Lobinske (Part 3): "Well, what if somebody out there somewhere rewrote your Melody Powers stories and posted them online?" "I'd say that if they're writing Melody Powers fanfiction, they need to really get a life."
  • Football Follies, by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): Amity League Preview 2009-10, by Chuck Ruttheimer. (And it only gets better! Read it now!)
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes 13.4: For Those About to Rock, We Salute You!, by Brother Grimace (teaser): For once in her life, Andrea Hecuba-Thorne agreed with Daria Morgendorffer. The obliteration of Lawndale High School had shaken her up so badly, Andrea did something that she rarely did – not only did she go to Pizza King and order pizza, but she actually sat down in a booth and ate it there, so she could be around people.
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Alternate Future 04: The Known future, by Psychotol (COMPLETE!): Two of his former green berets had been killed by Fran, the other two had been arrested along with half his force. He was working on a plan to rescue them. They hadn’t been able to revive everyone before they had to bug out, and one thing you quickly realize about the private soldier business, you had to make choices about who you break out of prison, and he had to minimize the risk by breaking out only those who were in the same prison as his most valuable assets.
  • Other Side, by Legendeld (Part 6): Several hours later after they had returned to Daniel’s house and stealthily sneaked inside, Daria found herself in the position of ordering him to remove his pants.
  • Snuffed Animals, by Disco316 (Part 12): Quinn answered Sandi’s question. “Well, Mom said that if we were going to go anywhere, they had to be with us. However, the more important reason is that we’re preventing a major hair dye faux pas. You know how that art chick’s hair is jet black? She wanted my cousin to dye it with stripes of blonde.” Stacy looked terrified, as usual. “Oh no! She’d end up with orange splotches everywhere!”

Saturday, January 24, 2009

News about Uranus (huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh)

Twenty-three years ago today, Voyager 2 came within 50,680 miles of Uranus.

Huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh!

To commemorate this event, Beavis and Butt-head offer a science article at right (from Reading Sucks) all about Uranus—

huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh!

—that has actual science information from Daria herself. Click on the article to read it.

Nothing else happened today.

Uranus. Huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh!

Latest non-Butt-head news: Dad Draws Daria Art on Kids' Lunchbags, from Roentgen. Cool! Thanks!

  • The Fall of the Angst Lords, Part 1: Rebels Without a Clue, by Gouka Ryuu (Part 1): With a mandolin in one hand, he awoke late... I guess that counts as practice, per Trent. A bit of faanfiction (spelling is correct) for all.
  • Long Trek Home, by Ranger Thorne (continued): Jane and Jennifer had practiced the biofilter regimen several times, but it didn't keep the two from being nervous. "That's one," Jennifer said finally.
  • Order and Chaos, by Legendeld (COMPLETE!): Maria looked down at the wooden plate in front of her and tried to keep an open mind. Seconds later she turned to Daria and begged in a desperate voice: “Please tell me this isn’t frog!”
  • Snuffed Animals, by Disco316 (Part 11): Quinn shuddered. “Eeeeew! Vampirism is so gross! Well, except for that 'Interview with Brad Pitt' movie; he’s good in anything.”
  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): "We have many different enemies, Great Lady, so we must make haste. The stars and planets are approaching the required conjunctions, and there are those who would use those alignments for their own purposes."

Friday, January 23, 2009

Something More to Celebrate

Let me do the math... um, okay, it was 177 years ago today that a certain fanfiction character, an original one in Daria-dom, was born. You are free to guess who it was before you click here for the answer. Good luck. If you get it right, you are either the author or a very loyal fanfiction reader!

So long as I have the bully pulpit, here are a few thoughts to spread around like manure, and like manure will either cause things to grow or else will stink, or both.

I would like to strongly encourage a certain activism among the fandom here to add your own stamp to the resources everyone draws upon. If you like using DariaWiki, by all means, find some pages that need work and go for it. A lot of the same names keep popping up as wiki editors and writers, but that well of writers is a very small one. If you have the itch to write and you love Daria, please add to the labor of love that DariaWiki is.

If you write fanfiction, send your works out to as many websites as possible. A goodly number were listed in previous posts, particularly here and here, so find some time to make your work famous the world over. A fandom exists only with the help of its fans, and until MTV pops some Daria on DVD out of the oven, we keep the flame alive, or something like that. You know what I mean. Brother Grimace certainly knows, as he has just posted 7,352,892 stories new and old to, just loads of stuff. You'll be reading until Kevin Thompson graduates high school, which will be a very long time indeed.

A long while ago I wrote about an "adopt a webpage" project, in which interested fans go web-surfing, find places that allow you to add content on Daria, and add that content. If you click on the phrase "adopt a webpage" under Labels, you will get the list of websites that (so far as can be told) allow for fan additions. Adopt a website or webpage of your own and make it something special. We can never have enough Daria websites. We have had too little, but never enough.

If you have some ideas for [winces as he says it] growing the fandom.... man, what an awful phrase. Sorry. Let's try that again.

We need ideas to help the fandom grow, in numbers as well as in personal enjoyment. If you have ideas for ways to make the fandom more fun, post them here or put them into action. Fun is the only reason we're here. Well, fun and obsession, those are the only two.... um, fun, obsession, and a need to communicate with other nutbars, that's three, wait.... forget it. You know what to do. Let's do it. Party on most righteously.

P.S. Now 1,119 fans at the Daria Fan Club. Jeez, that place grew fast.

P.P.S. Who was Daria's best writer? Take the poll by Byron Lomax and find out.
  • 3D Chess, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Could the problems with everyone in Lawndale be caused by the gods? A fic tinged with a bit of mythology and chock-full of the disdainful glare Daria fans know and love.
  • Daria Hunter, by bhut (COMPLETE!): Ms. Li’s newest pet project, Lawndale High’s Filmmaking Club, is shooting "Crocodile Hunter: Collision Course." Read it at your own peril.
  • DAYLIGHT: Baked Alaska, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Legionnaire Julia Carlyle takes a trip up to the Last Frontier to find old friends and enemies, and an unimaginable disaster.
  • DAYLIGHT: The Essentials of Everyday Living, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): The members of The Alliance meet new friends and a possible enemy in the ruins of Fostoria, Ohio.
  • DAYLIGHT: Kitchen Duty, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Daria and Sandi are stuck in the kitchen, together. Cynicism and sadness rise like bread dough.
  • Getting On With Living, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Jane has to verbally dress down a girl who's a bit too much into her past relationship with Tom Sloane. Based on an Iron Chef challenge.
  • Good Deed For The Day, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Daria does a good deed. No horrid consequences ensue.
  • Helen, The Depths of Her Own Mind, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): The fourth entry in the Visitations entry finds Helen Morgendorffer looking down the paths not taken and wondering if the choices she's made were the right ones.
  • Helping Hand, by Ivgie Sole (Parts 1 and 2): Having already suffered a great loss, Daria is about to lose her love, sanity, and perhaps her very life. That is, until an old friend comes to her rescue.
  • He's the QB, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): The fifth Visitations story, this one focuses on Kevin Thompson, the war in Iraq, and two very familiar characters arguing over the QB.
  • Jane Lane: Ace Attorney, by BatLurker (COMPLETE!): In this parody/fusion with the Ace Attorney games, Jane Lane abandons her art studies in favor of the law in order to face an old friend. Now she has to face said friend in savage courtroom combat.
  • A Legion Halloween, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): A LLH Special set between Chapters Thirteen and Fourteen. When the Legion holds a costume ball, several Legionnaires fight a real Halloween horror, and one discovers a secret that could change her life forever.
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: Meta Yo Mama, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Even young superheroes play “Yo Mama” for fun, as the Legion's advisor finds out during an early-evening patrol of Legion Tower.
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: A Quintessential Attitude, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Quinn's always been considered shallow, but as the newest Legionnaire discovers, even the carrot-topped fashion fiend has a heart.
  • Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: Waif Fu, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Sandi and Stacy go shopping. Three young punks decide to jump the two Legionnaires. Things get kinda sad after that.
  • Like Sandi, In The Hourglass, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): The third in the Visitations series. Sandi gets a visit from The Man... and, perhaps, is the better for it.
  • A Path of Roses and Thorns, Part 1, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Daria’s Aunt Amy is getting married! Set in the Falling into College universe and told in flashback from the wedding day itself, it’s the story of how Aunt Amy managed to get on that bumpy road to the altar.
  • A Path of Roses and Thorns, Part 2, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): The story of Amy’s trip down the aisle continues, complete with more bumps.
  • Size Does Matter, by HawkingRadiation, a.k.a. BlackHole (now up to Part 10 of 30+ posted elsewhere): What if Daria and Quinn were quite tall? How would they and their lives be different? How would everyone else react? Read how the characters deal with "big" problems in their daily life.
  • The Trouble With Veronica, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): What's with the third Morgendorffer sister? Where is she and why don't we ever see her around the house? Helen, Daria, and Quinn head to Grove Hills to see the youngest Morgendorffer… and you know what happens when Barksdale women get together.
  • When Worlds Divide, by BatLurker (Parts 1 and 2): The world of the adults has come to an abrupt end, and it is up to the kids to bring order back.

  • Accidents Will Happen, by Undefinedlust (Part 2): Jane paced around her room nervously. She had just hurt her best friend, but worse than the crushing guilt she felt was the other feelings that were flowing into her head. OK Lane, what the hell just happened? How the hell could you have done that to your best friend?
  • Apocalyptic Daria: Scarlett's Tale, by Doggieboy (Part 6): Scarlett suppressed a groan as her consciousness returned to her and she quickly opened her eyes and looked down. Then she winced and closed her eyes briefly. Oh, man, I’ve been in the same position all night. Wonder what time it is? Then she blinked and drew in a deep breath. John drugged me! (SFMB)
  • Cynic with a Vampire, by Peapotmaster (Part 2): “I’m from a far away country called Stokervania,” replied Veronique. “In my country, we like people who...” (
  • Long Trek Home, by Ranger Thorne (continued): “Let me get this straight,” Jane finally said. “You and a bunch of high school kids have a starship and have traveled from another universe to get here?”
  • Snuffed Animals, by Disco316 (Part 9): Jane stared, unblinking, at the ferocious beast before her. The large feline stared back at her, as if preparing to pounce on its prey. Jane’s expression was deathly calm as she pondered the predator before her.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

How Barbaric!

Robert E. Howard, creator of Conan the Barbarian, was born on this day 103 years ago. Conan himself is about 77. Upchuck, of course, commemorates the event.

Lots of interesting story ideas being tossed around on PPMB. The links starts at the beginning of the thread. Add your own ideas, take a few, have fun.


  • Long Trek Home, by Ranger Thorne (Part 2 continued): “Helen?” This voice was unfamiliar. “She named her daughter after my mother?”
  • Snuffed Animals, by Disco316 (Part 8): "Mom, are you and Dad all right?”

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Another Caption Contest!

As Daria and Jane smile and look at each other, what are they thinking?

Graduation and Goodbyes

Seven years ago, Is It College Yet? aired, and the series was over. Much commentary came out about The End: The CBS Early Show, TV Guide Online, Slate Magazine, etc. The fans even had their say.

Fanfiction did not stop, however. Some stories even picked up at the exact moment IICY? ended (e.g, "Brother, When You're Found"). And it has run merrily along to this day, with no sign of stopping.

No deep thoughts here. Just keep up the good work, people.

Curiously, today is also Squirrel Appreciation Day. The coincidence is almost too much. More squirrel stories, please. :)

LATE BREAKING NEWS: Sleepless is back! "Broken Connections" and "Yuki-Onna" will be continued! Rejoice!


Tuesday, January 20, 2009

"It Is the Dawning of the Age of [fill in the blank]"

Time once more for The Head to show us the current astrological sign for the next month or so. I wonder where all the other zodiac signs went. Only a few seemed to have survived, like Libra (Dawn), Scorpio (Rock 'n Roll Randy), and this one.

Um, uh, okay, that was about all I could think of to say. Gimme some time to come up with something intelligent. Or you can in the Comments.

1800 hours, ET: Still nothing intelligent to say.

1807: Oh, here we go. Brother Grimace added more pages to DariaWiki, including one about a Code 513 event. Whatever could that be? Heh heh heh.


  • Jane Lane: Ace Attorney, by Lorenzo Sauchelli (COMPLETE!): Jane stood up and put both hands on her table. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Detective, how would you describe my client's apartment?"
  • Long Trek Home, by Ranger Thorne (Part 2): It was the pointed ears that caused the woman to mutter, "Great, we've been invaded by elves."
  • Scenes That Should Be: Brains for Rent (unnamed crossover story), by NightGoblyn (Parts 1 and 2): “I was running,” Jane said. “Down by the quarry, near the train tracks. I saw Daria.”
  • Snuffed Animals, by Disco316 (Part 7): Tom twitched at hearing Jane behind him. He turned around, and saw his girlfriend behind him, holding their pizza over his head.
  • Turnabout Confusion Part II: All The King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): Stacy and Tiffany found Quinn waiting when they reached the bathroom. The redhead leaned against the door, arms crossed as she blocked the way. Here we go, thought Stacy. PLUS: "Miss Morgendorffer to the Principal's Office. Miss Daria Morgendorffer to the Principal's office." The fit is about to hit the shan!
  • Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (Chapter 3, Part 7): Jane was sleeping peacefully on her side. The blanket and sheets still arranged relatively neatly over her. Only a soft barely audible rasping sound came from Jane’s open mouth, as opposed to the window rattling snores, which could usually be heard when one approached the artist’s room in the early mornings.

Happy Inauguration Day!

And wouldn't you know it, I can't find a single Daria image to go with the day. Dang. Okay, we'll just go with the seal itself.

Hmm, looks nice enough.

Three years ago today, Kara Wild conducted the first interview with Anne D. Bernstein, and a lot of fun that was. Four years ago, the DVDaria blog got underway. Let's keep hoping it works. Kara Wild got that one going, too.

Oops, I missed posting the alter egos yesterday for Janis Joplin's birthday (Quinn) and Dolly Parton's birthday (Ms. Barch). Sigh. Next year, then.

Tomorrow is the 7th anniversary of the airing of Is It College Yet? I joined the fandom shortly after that. That's just like me, always on time.

Oh, today's the start of the Aquarius thing, too. Have to bring out The Head for it later. Enjoy.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Happy MLK Holiday!

Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking. There is an almost universal quest for easy answers and half-baked solutions. Nothing pains some people more than having to think.

—Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Seemed appropriate, given the fandom and the day. Enjoy.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Caption Contest!

Superfan UU was kind enough to send this image to me, showing Jodie signing Brittany's yearbook in Is It Fall Yet? Your mission: tell us in the Comments section what Jodie wrote!

Farewell, seven years ago

Seven years ago today, Animation Magazine ran an article on the final TV movie for Daria, set to air only a few days from then. You can read the article at Outpost Daria here. Ms. Barch will give the eulogy.


  • Data Dump, by CINCGREEN (Part 11): Daria Morgendorffer put on the black mask. It was a mask that covered her entire head, like an item of rubber fetish wear.

  • Falling into College 66: Christmas in White, by Richard Lobinske (Part 1): "Look at the bright side," Daria said. "Girls fighting over the bouquet can be cheap and enjoyable entertainment."
  • Long Trek Home, by Ranger Thorne (Part 2): God, I hope this isn't our universe. We've been using the charts in the computer to check out worlds that are supposed to be inhabited while we headed to Earth. They aren't. It looks as if something has wiped all traces of intelligent life from the surface.
  • Order and Chaos, by Legendeld (Part 20): “You’re a Sith.” It didn’t seem to be a question or even a statement so she didn’t bother to answer. “I think you want to kill them.”
  • Other Side, by Legendeld (Part 5): "We spent two hundred years allowing the machines to do all the work. We spend so much time keeping the ones we have working that we do not have the time or resources to develop new ones.”
  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): A polka version of Led Zeppelin's "Kashmir"? At a wedding? This would make an interesting crossover with "Christmas in White," above! And in the next part, we hear Sandi say: "So, Stacy, let me see if I understand this correctly. You're going to go flying off to the center of our galaxy just to blow up another galaxy to the sounds of Michael Bolton."

Saturday, January 17, 2009

The Greatest

The greatest athlete and sports hero in recorded history, who also happened to be born in my hometown of Louisville, is Muhammad Ali, born this date 67 years ago. He is the Greatest. Stacy does her best impersonation at boxing (seems to have a cut around her right eye), but unless she wigs out and imagines everyone is Sandi Griffin, she won't go very far. I don't think she's imitating any particular person here, but who knows.

Thirteen years ago today, Daria appeared in a Beavis and Butt-head episode entitled "Sprout." This is widely said to be one of the best B&B episodes. Enjoy it when you get the chance.

I'm having fun working on the Backgrounders site. So far, I've discovered that Shaggy not only can appear in two places at once (he's done it twice), time travel, and change his height, he can also shape-change into other students. I've also discovered a student in a jade-colored hoodie who can teleport. What the hell kind of school is Lawndale High? Jeepers.

Oh, and UU discovered an African-American girl who can change herself into a blonde in an instant. Seriously. Damn, these kids.

My, How Opinions Change

Or at least Helen's, when it comes to selecting a college for her daughter.

In the season 1 story, "College Bored", Helen was excited about taking Daria and Quinn to see Middleton College (from the Outpost Daria transcript):

Quinn - We have to visit a college of our choosing.

Helen - Great! We'll go to Middleton!

Jake - We'll all head up to the old alma mater this weekend!

Quinn - Wait! We get to pick the college, and no one said you could come.

Helen - But Quinn, your father and I would love it if you kids followed in our footsteps.

However, by the time Is It College Yet? rolled around, Helen had much less enthusiasm for Daria to attend her old college (Outpost Daria transcript):

Daria – I didn’t get into the school that I wanted, and you wanted for me. What am I supposed to think about my prospects?

Helen – Your prospects? Daria, you’ll be going to your second choice college, not prison. Look at me, I went to Middleton. It’s not half the school that Raft is.

Daria – What?

Helen – Middleton’s not half the school that Raft is, as you know damned well. I applied to college during the height of the baby boom. Competition was so fierce I got rejected from my first and second choices. And, see, I lived to tell about it.

Daria – Um, Dad seems to think Middleton’s hot stuff.

Helen – Your father needs to maintain certain illusions about his youth in order to function. It’s…(forced laugh)…cute.

Which makes you wonder about what happened. Did the visit in "College Bored" turn Helen off of her old school? Was it a subtle plot to convince her daughters to be careful about the college they choose? A matter of Helen maturing as a mother? Or the writers not remembering the events of "College Bored"?

Friday, January 16, 2009

I think I'm a clone now...

A little over a year ago, TAG posted here about various ways the DNA samples collected by Ms. Li may have been misused. Among other possibilities, he mentioned clones of Kevin. But would even Ms. Li herself unleash such a heinous creation on the unsuspecting world? Well, I'm here to tell you that the answer is yes!

We have here, courtesy of amateur photographer Charles Ruttheimer III, the only known picture of Oakwood High School quarterback Sam Stack. Don't be distracted by the extra-bouncy squeak toy sitting next to him. Look closely at young Mr. Stack.

Take careful note of the face, particularly the goofy grin. Does he remind you of anyone? Perhaps someone who is also dopey yet athletic? Someone like the Lawndale quarterback? Someone (for those of you having trouble keeping up) like Kevin Thompson?

What are the odds of two rival high schools having virtually identical quarterbacks who both attract the same blond cheerleader? Clearly this is evidence that Ms. Li has been selling Kevin's DNA to rival high schools so that they can grow their own IQ-impaired quarterbacks. Oh, the unspeakable horror of it all.

But that's not the end of this investigation! Look even more closely at that photograph. Kevin's face isn't the only familiar aspect of this young man. Where would he have gotten that lighter shade of hair? And that odd hairstyle? Could it be?

Yes! We have solved the mystery. For reasons unknown to us (and probably to herself, as well), Ms. Li has mixed Kevin's DNA with O'Neill's to achieve a hybrid so frightening I don't even want to think about it.

And on that note, I end. Pleasant dreams!

The One for Whom That Award Was Named

Zoologist and gorilla friend Dian Fossey was born 76 years ago today. An award was named for her at Lawndale High, allegedly an annual presentation. In Is It College Yet?, Ms. Li introduced the award thusly: "I give you the winner of this year's Lawndale High School Diane Fossey Award for dazzling academic achievement in the face of near-total misanthropy... Ms. Daria Morgendorffer!"

Is the naming of the award fair? The Internet reports that Ms. Fossey once said, "
I feel more comfortable with gorillas than people. I can anticipate what a gorilla's going to do, and they're purely motivated." The Internet also reports she said, "The more you learn about the dignity of the gorilla, the more you want to avoid people." Given that Ms. Fossey was murdered by humans, not by gorillas, her prejudices do not seem far off target.

Others have pointed out that the image on the award appears to be a golden gorilla posed like Rodin's The Thinker. This is never mentioned in the series, but the picture at right makes the similarity quite clear.

Lawndale Online is still in the planning stages of an upgrade. More data about it here. You go, girl! Uh, website!

The three-day weekend for Dr. Martin Luther King Day was the time when a certain Daria fanfic took place: "Invisible Planet."

It was nine years ago today that Kara Wild posted her essay, "The Helen-Jane-Jodie Connection." Intriguing. Read it.

Now 1,109 fans in the Daria Fan Club.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Cuchi-cuchi, or Coochie-coochie?

Spanish-American entertainer Charo, whom I'm not sure many of you remember, was born 67 57 years ago today. Helen Morgendorffer does her best Charo imitation at left. (Charo is blonde.) Charo's actual name (I swear) is María Rosario Pilar Martínez Molina Moquiere de les Esperades Santa Ana Romanguera y de la Najosa Rasten, which neatly explains why everyone calls her Charo. Her website is here. The costume Helen wears is similar to the one Charo wears at right (click for larger image). Charo is a very accomplished guitarist, and her website has some of her music. She started the catchphrase "cuchi-cuchi."

Today is a significant date in a certain Daria fanfic that you may wish to read: Fast Times at Lawndale High. I remember the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High. It was weird. Sean Penn's changed a lot.

Most recent addition to DariaWiki: Brother Grimace presents Training Cadre 3000!

  • Daylight: Soft Rains, by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): A very short story with an ending only an Angst Lord could love, and I do.
  • Size Does Matter, by Blackhole (Part 34): Tiffany left her room in a hurry. She had no intended to give her mother another chance to rain her “Knock her up, marry her, elope - but get her out of the house!” rant on one of her dates. That gave them ideas. (SFMB)
  • Snuffed Animals, by Disco316 (Parts 5 and 6): “I trust you," said Jane. "I just don’t trust...” “Don’t trust what? My judgment? My hormones? My sister? What?” “Tom.” [Ah....]
  • Something Not Yet Named, by Gouka Ryuu (COMPLETE!): "This is the story of I got my name," spoke the bard, "though our country's fictional characters also have a place in the tale."
  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): "All right. Whose brains did you eat this time?"

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

A Cheap-Ass Clip Show

Seven years ago this evening, "Look Back in Annoyance" was aired on MTV. A 30-minute retrospective of Daria's five seasons, the show was put together by Glenn Eichler and Anne D. Bernstein. The title is a pun based on the British play/movie Look Back in Anger, from the 1950s. Lots of fourth-wall breaking, clever quips, and memories.

This day marks another anniversary, but this time in Fanfiction-land and a bit more serious. Twenty-six years ago today, someone died who was very important to Daria in one of her many alternate universes. Can you guess who it was? If not, the answer lies within.

Greystar needs some help breaking through his writer's block. Go forth and help him! However, he needs no help in starting a great new Iron Chef: Beeep! Very funny!
  • Daria One Half, by BatLurker, a.k.a. Lorenzo Sauchelli (Part 6): A Japanese boy with a heavy backpack, a bandanna around his head and a pair of goggles covering his eyes smiled as he saw the giant strawberry. He looked at his map and nodded to himself and took off the goggles. "Saotome Ranma, prepare to meet me!"
  • Daria: The College Years, by Farren O'Blivion: Farren has changed the ending to chapter 10 and is holding the story hostage. You must read the new ending to chapter 10 and respond to it, or else NO MORE FOR YOU! Do as she says, and no fanfic gets hurt!

  • Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): "It was our hope that one day you would become a Priestess-Controller and be the one of those who would turn the keys and launch the Holy Rockets at The End Of Days."
  • Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (Part 6.75 of Chapter 3): They’ll be fine, came Alex's last thoughts before drifting off to sleep. Or the Fashion Club will be murdered horribly and creatively. Either way, it will all work out for the best.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Daria Wants You To Vote

The nominations are up for the 2008 Daria Fanworks Awards, or Booties. Lots of good stuff this year, so savor the nominations and vote for your favorites.

Written works are here.

Visual Works are here.

How to vote is here.

Happy Birthday, Cherry Lane!

Time for another fanfiction character birthday. Little Cherry Lane, assumed daughter of Wind Lane and a succubus from Hell, is only four years old today! Congratulations to her, and to her Uncle Mayna—um, Trent, and her godparent, NightGoblyn. Woo-hoo!

Hmmm. I don't seem to have a picture of little Cherry. Oh, well, here are pictures of her aunt and uncle. Er, aunt and other aunt. Whatever. She looks like Jane a little. Cherry does, I mean. You know what I mean. I don't.

More later.

Monday, January 12, 2009

An Introduction

As you may have noticed, TAG has invited a few of us other inmates, er, fans, to participate in his blog. Why, you may ask? Probably because he's lazy and tired of keeping this place up all by himself, but at the same time unwilling to let it slide. Of course, now if it slides anyway, he can just blame us newbies. Not that he'd be so devious. In any case, since I'll be contributing here, I thought I'd introduce myself, and explain how I came to be a member of this fandom.

If you participate (or lurk) on the PPMB, you know me as smk. For the purposes of this blog, I shall be hereinafter known as, 'the smk chick'. As The Kristen Bealer Guy noted, there was kind of a pattern to the names, but since I don't particularly want to be thought of as a guy, and since, unlike Kristen Bealer, smk is gender-neutral, I decided on the smk chick. And it's not capitalized because I'm pretty sure it'll bug TAG.

As for how I came to be part of this fandom, about two and a half years ago I suddenly had access to DSL. I'd never had DSL before, and wanted to compare the speed to dial up. It seemed that streaming video would be a good test, so I went to YouTube. That day they happened to be featuring a channel from nightwinggirl (I am unsure of the spelling, it's been awhile and since YouTube suspended the account [Stupid YouTube. But I'm not bitter.] it's a little hard to check). The channel had a play list with all of the Daria episodes, in order, including the unaired pilot. Over the next few weeks, I watched the whole series. Some of the comments referenced Outpost Daria, so I checked that out. I had never heard of fan fiction, but when the series was done, I still wanted more, so I started reading some of the fan fiction, on Outpost Daria and elsewhere. Then I clicked a few links, found the PPMB, discovered the Creative Writing forum, realized there was new stuff to be found there, and lurked for a little while.

I may never have decided to actively participate, if it hadn't been for one post. You see, prior to this, not only had I never heard of fan fiction, I'd never heard of message boards and had no idea that any fans other than Trekkies were active in any sense; the whole thing was unfamiliar and a little scary. When I'd been compulsively reading fan fiction, though, I did e-mail two or three authors. One was Lawndale Stalker. Once Upon a Time at College was unfinished, leaving a huge question unanswered, and I wanted to know, dammit! And he refused to answer, claiming he'd finish the story one day. (And has that happened? No! But I'm not bitter.) Then, in my lurking, I came across the following post:

(I know I should probably be able to capture an image of the screen and post it here, but I don't want to brag on my 1337 skillz, so just follow the link and pretend, 'kay?)

That was me! He was talking about me! I was compelled to respond, so I de-lurked. Once the door was open, I found that participating in an online community (this one, anyway) was much less scary than I thought, and in fact have found that this is a comfortable place to be. Even though my online experience has broadened, this is still my favorite place on the 'net.

That's quite enough about me, and I promise that future posts will strictly limit use of the word 'I' (but I promise nothing about the parentheses).

The Jesse Moreno Show?

Today is Howard Stern's 55th birthday, and MTV artists saw fit to have Jesse be Howard Stern in a late-season alter ego. Hmm, not really like him, sorry.

In case you missed the Secret Fandom Codes unearthed by A.J. on PPMB, here they are. Study them carefully, and you too can become a Secret Master of Fandom! Or committed, whichever. updated on the 10th, more stories online. Lawndale Online has Richard Lobinske's "Arrivals and Returns" (FiC 65). Legendeld had more rantings today.

Other than that, it is Monday. Hope yours is a good one.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Who in the world is Upchuck pretending to be?

Okay, here's a clue: I thought it was from a TV show, particularly a cop show like Starsky and Hutch.

But I was wrong. It's from a movie. The artist was quite devious.

Moar l8r.

ANNIVERSARIES: Nine years ago today, Kara Wild posted "Erin the Head." Read and remember.

SAD NEWS DEPT.: MartinUK informs us that The Irony Maiden website has gone down and might not be coming up again. In that event, I will try to reconnect the links in the Daria Directory with WayBack Machine versions of Irony Maiden, particularly the excellent Dariacon advice that was there. Very sorry to hear this.

GIVE UP? If you want the answer to who Upchuck is (and you will be surprised), click here. Enjoy.
  • Dancing with the Devil by the Pale Moonlight, by Batlurker, a.k.a. Lorenzo Sauchelli (Parts 1 and 2): “Huh?” Trent blinked. “Who?” The man smiled slightly and pointed at the article. “Jane Lane, age 19. You know her, don’t you?”
  • Daria One Half, by Batlurker, a.k.a. Lorenzo Sauchelli the Writing Machine! (Part 5): Mrs. Manson looked at Ranma and nodded to herself. "As you can see, our Lawndale High students take great pride in their school. That's why you'll be taking a small psychological exam to spot any little clouds on the horizon as you sail the student seas of Lawndale High."
  • Order and Chaos, by Legendeld (Part 19): Jake was fuming as he paced. “In my own house, a damn Jedi temple.”
  • Other Side, by Legendeld the Writing Machine! (Part 4): Daniel smiled down at Daria as he lowered her to the floor. “I never heard of someone coming back from falling down a Tesla hole before.”
AUGH! Now getting a 404 Not Found error for DariaWiki! AUGH!

Oh, right, I forgot they were moving the site to a new server this weekend. Never mind! It'll be back soon.

Hello, hello...

It's me - Brother Grimace. Nice to see you. I'll be dashing in and out every now and then to make Daria-centric comments. First things first - TAG, thanks for letting me play.

Nothing to rant or say right now. Guess I'll just post a little reminder of one of my favorite Daria episodes - Quinn The Brain:

Always did think the 'boob-enhancing' baby-T that she wore here was, well, in the words of Bill and Ted, "Not bad." As PPMB denizen smk has reminded me - she said that I need a slightly classier term than 'sweater puppies'. She's right - but the original term that I heard, from Alan Ruck's Upchuck-esque character 'Stewart' on ABC's Spin City, was 'sweater meat'.

Along those lines - sooner or later, TAG and I will have a serious discussion on the nature of Helen Morgendorffer's greatest assets - well, beside her brains and her uber-competitive, 'win at all costs', 'take-no-prisoners!' attitude. On an actyual serious note, though, one of the things I'm working on for 2009 (besides finishing up ALL of my unfinished fics!) is an essay on the nature of romance in Daria. I'm trying to look into why (or why not) several characters are together, and the background/backstory for those characters. For example - Janet Barch. On first glance, she seems truly unredeemable - but if you look closely, she's one of the saddest, most damaged characters in the show, from beginning to end - and it's not her fault.

The crux of Janet's problems stems from her divorce, which apparently changed her from - what? - to the male-hating virago we know from the show. Consider, however, a couple of facts.

* Janet Barch is an intelligent woman - and actually VERY or even EXTREMELY intelligent. (Greg Grumman, playing a bit part on an episode of House, M.D. commented on Greg House himself as being in the same vein. 'He's gotta be good, because when you're a jerk like that, you're either good or you're unemployed.' ) However, because of the way her personality (in this supposition) changed - she was probably released from whatever position she had, and she was lucky to find work as a teacher at Lawndale High. Angela Li probably had her over a barrel - the only job that she could get where she could do anything near what she loves - science - and get an actual living wage, Li gets a top-flight teacher working for her (in the case of the girls only, and occasionally a boy or two), and occasionally vent out her rage and frustration against the other gender without too much blowback.

* Janet was actually one hell of a wife. She was married for twenty-two years (for you Star Trek:The Next Generation fans - that's the exact length of Jean-Luc Picard's first mission aboard his first command; USS Stargazer. Very few women, even if they're dumber than bricks when it comes to men, would spend twenty-two years married to a guy if something in that marriage wasn't working, and vice-versa.

* Janet actually loved her husband very much. 'A woman scorned', and all that - and it seems, from the little data that the show's given us, that Janet was the victim of 'the seven-year itch' - adjusted for inflation, of course. The ex-hubby seems to have found younger, cuter, more eager to please in bed and too young to understand that she's being used; the ex ran off with this young thing... and it tore Janet apart. The only way she found that she could cope is to lash out and hurt everyone as much as she's hurting inside... and she's never stopped hurting.

I also think that the absolute worst thing that she could have done is to get involved with Timothy O'Neill. Can you say 'classic case of overcompensation?' If the show had ever tried to give some depth to any of the secondary characters, Janet would have been perfect; I would have loved it when she dumped O'Neill (I swear befor God, I REALLY can't see them lasting too long before he starts to remember that he has a penis and 'allows' some starstruck teenage girl in one of his English classes to 'help him with his Longfellow', to recycle an old joke. (I always saw O'Neill as the teacher most likely to get into trouble that way, and then hang himself in his classroom just before the bell OR to do it in front of his class. I really can't tell you how much I despise that character.) Anyway, he'd screw the teeny-bopper and then go running to Janet for confession and forgiveness ('because she can understand my pain - howI'm suffering because I couldn't control myself, andhow I've damaged that young girl's trust in all adults, and all men...'). I'd hand her the axe handle my brother used to keep in his trunk, and tell her that no one will ever know. They could show the tape on Youtube and FOX News with her face in high-def, and no charges will ever be filed because it's obviously temporary insanity AND self-defense.

Well. That's a little more serious than I wanted to get on my first turn out of the bullpen.

We'll go for something lighter next time, I think.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Two More Alter-Ego Puzzles

To be fair, I figured out who Upchuck (at right) was disguised as. I kept thinking his weird haircut and posture meant something. They did, even though the official MTV caption on the "Daria: Alter Egos" flipbook gave no clue. ("Upchuck whips out his pistol.") Can anyone else guess who he's supposed to be?

Mr. DeMartino (at left), however, has me stumped. The weird makeup, hair, clothing—beats me, man. Looks like something off a horror movie or Tim Burton production.

Your turn. Who are these guys?

NEWS FLASH: Over 60,000 visits to this blog! Thank you!

  • John Lane 38: Yeah, It's Summer, by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): WTF?!?!?! OMG!!! YESSSSS!!! I KNEW SHE'D DO IT!!! ALL HAIL ALISON, QUEEN OF ANGSTOSTAN!!!
  • Snuffed Animals, by Disco316 (Part 4): Daria stared at her computer screen, as she had been doing for the last 15 minutes. Damn, still no spontaneously generated story ideas. Well, except that one, but hearing what people are thinking has been done to death.
  • Two Halves, by Dark Kuno (Part 6.5 of Chapter 3): Hospital? Did someone say hospital? Does that mean.... angst?