Theeeeese Staaaaars are Shiiiiiny....

Tiffany is about to be deeply disappointed to learn that Nicolaus Copernicus, born on this day in 1473, was right and the universe does not revolve around her. I'm just kidding, of course. The day Tiffany successfully learns anything will be a very cold day in Hell.

However, Smart Tiffany does occasionally exist in fanfic, and Kara Wild published an essay on this day in 2000 on this very topic: "The Off-Canon Approach." What does it mean for a story to be just like a Daria episode versus veering off into non-canon territory? Read the essay and consider the ideas.

Finally, the episode "Fizz Ed" first aired on this day in 2001, and the subject matter has only gotten more relevant with time. Just so we're clear, I'm referring to corporate marketing in schools, not principals attacking soda machines with axes.

Fandom News!

• There's still time to vote for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards!


• Lord Goring created a thread where you post words.


• cfardell_Brenorenz29 posted a new Iron Chef: Remembering Jane.

Do Butterflies Sing Opera?

Daria's got the wrong idea, because today is the anniversary of the premiere of Madama Butterfly in 1904, which doesn't feature any actual butterflies. I don't think Jane will be impressed, either, because we know how she feels about delicate winged insects after hearing about them from her mother. Still, I hope Mr. DeMartino is planning to see the opera performed in the PayDay automotive department! Refreshments in the form of free samples will be served.

Mack will be less than impressed to know that today is also Michael Jordan's 62nd birthday, but maybe this will be a good chance to change his middle name back to James. Maybe the Lane naming gazebo is available!

In Daria-specific anniversaries, the episode "Daria!" aired on this day in 1999 and the Sarcastathon 3000 aired on this day in 2001. I don't think anyone from the musical episode will be joining the opera performance at PayDay anytime soon.

Fanfic Update!

• Our Friend in City Hall (Daria and The Gang Thread), by roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Going to City Hall was always the sucky part of the week, Stacy Rowe thought."


• Spider Quinn 14 Battle and Consequence, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "At Casa Lane, Jane was still thinking about what was happening with Tania when a report came on the radio."


• Unattainable Lane, by janendaria4life (COMPLETE!): "Daria sat on the couch, waiting impatiently for Jane to arrive so they could watch the upcoming 'Sick, Sad World' marathon."


• Valentine's Daze, by wilddogjj (COMPLETE!): "Stacy's brother, Adam Rowe, was quite the playboy. After work, he'd gone to the local bar. Now, he was coming home with a hot, buxom blond that he'd picked up." (Part 2) (Part 3)

Gimme Some Chocolate, Dammit!

I think that Mrs. Johanssen must have misheard because although it's Make Mine Chocolate day she appears to have asked someone to "make ME chocolate." I'll have no problems celebrating this one, especially as today is another one of my favorite holidays: discount candy day.

Yesterday, of course, was Valentine's Day, but today we flip the script and celebrate Singles Awareness Day instead. Daria has plenty of experience with this one, and I'll bet she prefers it that way. Especially after her multiple spectacular failures in dating throughout the show.

On this day in 1999, "Daria Day 99" aired on MTV. There don't appear to be any clips or even a transcript out there for this one, so any Daria treasure hunters should consider this the Holy Grail of Daria finds!

Fandom News!

• Don't forget to vote for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards!


• ladyevil shares her ideas for Daria Valentine Cards.

Kiss and Tell Someone You're Sorry

Daria is all set to celebrate Kiss Day, but the question is, who's going to take her up on it? I imagine Tom would not be welcome, considering their history, but maybe Trent would be an acceptable alternative? Assuming he's awake, that is.

It seems appropriate that today is also National Apology Day, because Daria kissing people tends to lead to problems. I imagine the phrase "kiss and make up" has an entirely different meaning to her.

If you mess up so badly that even an apology won't cover it, you could always observe Get a Different Name Day and get a fresh start. Just remember Jake's advice: "Walk away. You change your name, move to another state, get some ID. It's not too late to start over, Daria, it's not too late! You're still a young man! You don't have to live with your mistakes! Get out while you can!"

Fanfic Update!

• Her Last Words, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (part 80): "Lawndale High School was for sure, just like the once peaceful and sleepy town all around it, simply not the same anymore."


• Red (Daria and The Gang Thread), by roentgen (COMPLETE!): "The worst part of any morning was 6:20 am when Scarlett LeFaye's phone alarm went off."


• Timmy's Awokening, by wilddogjj (COMPLETE!): "Kevin was frantically pounding on the door to Daryl's apartment, having followed him all the way from the Carbone's Super Bowl party."

Keep Watching the Geeky Skies!

I see Lawndale is busy celebrating Extraterrestrial Culture Day, and I'm sure Artie is in there somewhere. I'm not sure if he's there to have fun or to educate others, but either way you can bet he'll show up before too long.

Trent is more likely to play music (or a close approximation of it) because it's not only Get Out Your Guitar Day but also National Guitar Day! If he decides to perform at the UFO convention, then I'm sure the place will be empty within minutes.

I think he'd be better off playing in Max's Tank, and not just because it's National Van Day. If we're lucky, the van will break down somewhere inconvenient and no one will have to listen to his music at all!

Fandom News!

• Voting is open for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards!

Watch Out For That Extra Grease!

Daria and Jane have clearly taken National Pizza Day much, much too far, but that won't stop them from ordering another pie. If you celebrate, please be responsible or at least keep some antacids handy!

Pizza would make an excellent treat for any football fans that are planning to watch the Super Bowl today! I'm sure Kevin will be among them, but Ms. Li might decide to schedule another school review meeting so watch out for that.

Please don't tell Ms. Barch that today is Man Day, because I'm sure it's her least favorite day of the year. However, Jake and Trent should feel free to sing songs about being manly as long as they don't immediately get into a car crash afterward.

Fanfic Update!

• The Feast of Lupercal, by Blake C Stacey (BlakeStacey) (part 4): "Daria found Saavik in the mythology aisle. The classification, as befits used books, was imprecise."


• I (Don't) Want to Be a Part of It, by ladyevil (part 2): "Meanwhile, on the streets of New York, Jesse hurried across an intersection, arms filled with two manuscripts and guitar case in hand."


• Mysteries of Aurora, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 9): "Olivia soon changed into her swimming costume, and had a look at one of the pools."


• Spider Quinn 14 Battle and Consequence, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "They came to a corner office, after evading another of those robot arms."


• Timmy's Awokening, by wilddogjj (parts 1 and 2): "Jim and Quinn were sitting at the kitchen table. Quinn was reading mail while Jim was assembling small figurines of various players for the Kansas City Chiefs and the Philadelphia Eagles." (Part 2)

Can He Pirouette?

Mr. DeMartino is surprisingly graceful as he celebrates National Ballet Day, but judging by the look on his face Kevin is nearby and about to cause a serious problem. Daria, meanwhile, will continue to regret not taking ballet the next time she has to pee outdoors...but let's hope those occasions are quite rare.

Unfortunately, Mr. D. has committed a grave faux pas by wearing a pink tutu, because it's National Wear Red Day! Jane, fortunately, has been observing this day almost constantly for years.

I'm sure Ted will be happy to know that today is Bubble Gum Day, and he can chew to his heart's content. On the other hand, if he's only tried the non-bubble variety then he might not be ready for the hard stuff yet.

Fandom News!

• Meester_Lee wonders about Daria going goth.


• cortez has a question about Steve Taylor and the crystal trophy.


• Could Amtrak be coming to Ronkonkoma?

You Go, Girls!

Jane is certainly having a successful National Girls and Women in Sports Day, because "women can excel at any sport they put their minds to." This quote would be more inspirational if it hadn't been jerkass Evan who said it, but it's still true.

Let's hope she runs like the wind instead of breaking wind, even if it is National Fart Day. I guess that would be one way to keep the other runners from catching up, because you can't run if you're trying to hold your breath.

Still, while farting in public would be a social disaster, it would be appropriate for Disaster Day! With the Super Bowl coming up, be careful not to wear cream to any parties because "Dip is short for dipsaster!"

Fanfic Update!

• A Moment in the Post Fashion Club Life of Tiffany Blum-Deckler, by Chaoslordsquidward (COMPLETE!): "Tiffany sat down in silence in history class. This isn’t how things used to be."

Do They Have Birdlike Appetites?

Jake and Helen have chosen a truly unorthodox method of celebrating Feed the Birds Day, but I guess when you've had your fill of frozen lasagna then any meal sounds good. I just hope we don't have to see any regurgitation.

Meanwhile, I'm sure Jane would much rather celebrate American Painters Day because she is both American and a painter. The only question is, will she celebrate by painting or by enjoying the work of her favorite artists? The answer is most likely both.

Fandom News!

• Last chance to submit your nominations for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards!

How Many of Those Tattoos Did He Get Out of a Magazine?

Jake has taken International Face and Body Art Day fully to heart, as every visible bit of him (and possibly bits that aren't visible) have clearly been covered with artwork. I'm not sure if Axl just had a very busy day or if Jake went with a less permanent option. Knowing Jake's pain tolerance--or lack thereof--I suspect it's the latter.

You'd think Jane would be celebrating this one, but actually she decided to go with Decorating With Candy Day instead. Let's just hope she's able to keep Tom away from her art supplies and/or gummy bears.

Finally, I'd like to wish one of Daria's least talkative characters a happy National Sean Day! If Quinn ever lets him get a word in, I guarantee that the word will be "What?"

Fanfic Update!

• Cynic and the Tower of Joy, by Meester_Lee (part 4): "'We’re getting away from the reason we’re here,' said Miley. 'We want you to release your prisoners.'"


• Her Last Words, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (parts 78 and 79): "November had come to Pennsylvania with a vast and silvery sky, the frost was quite severe for that time of the year, the wind blowing from Lake Erie was fierce and every tree in the town had already lost all of those colorful leaves now that Autumn was over." Part 79


• Spider Quinn 14 Battle and Consequence, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "Quinn was designing something when her door was flung open. 'Tania Ashworth?' she asked. 'What are you doing here?'"


• Warmth Like Vinyl, by Val_Creative (COMPLETE!): "As the years go on, Trent stops answering questions about settling down. He's nearing forty."

Hi-Yo, Mack Daddy!

Mack is celebrating the anniversary of "The Lone Ranger," which debuted as a radio show on this day in 1930. Unfortunately, if he thinks that mask is going to hide his identity from Kevin and thus offer him any peace, he's going to be disappointed.

If anyone wants any ideas for observing National Inane Answering Message Day, Upchuck has a few options:

"This is Charles. I can't come to the phone right now, because I am occupado. I could tell you what I am doing, but let's not ruin the mystery. At the tone, leave your name, number, and the time you called, and I will get back to you as soon as I can tear myself away from my life of intrigue, about which I cannot be specific, lest I put both my life and yours in danger."

"No, no...not now, girls! This is Charles Ruttheimer the Third, and you have reached my answering machine...please, ladies, patience!...speak clearly at the tone and...I'm on my way, my dears!...they so hate to be kept waiting...anyway, I'll get back to you as soon as possible...if this is an emergency, well, so is a woman on fire!"

"You have successfully contacted the underground grotto of The Ruttheimer Group, currently engineering our secret plan to achieve world domination by the year 2010. If you would like to know more about our plans to gain global control of mass media, subjugate the military forces of every nation on Earth, and install Charles Ruttheimer the Third as supreme ruler of all humankind, please leave your name and address at the beep, and we will send you an informative brochure and a free bumper sticker."

On second thought, you'd better just come up with your own. Upchuck's are a little too inane.

Fandom News!

• Remember to submit your nominations for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards!


• An amateur astronomer mistook Elon Musk's orbiting Tesla for an asteroid recently.


• cortez suggests that the pictures we see at the end of the Daria episodes are actually parallel universe counterparts.

Pop Goes the Artist

Daria has decided to celebrate Pop Art Day by creating her own knock-off featuring Jane. This will be a relief to Jane, who has painted more than her share of knock-offs and will be happy to take a break.

I'm sure Jane would rather celebrate the anniversary of Jackson Pollock's birth on this day in 1912, anyway. I'm sure it wouldn't be necessary to decorate the entire high school gym, though, as once was certainly enough.

Finally, let's wish Daria's favorite aunt a happy National Amy Day, and let's hope she's able to take another fun vacation to make Helen sick with jealousy. Especially if she's able to get Ralph Fiennes to join her.

Fanfic Update!

• The Engineer and the Time Lady, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 25): "Kristoff grew exhasperated as the Trolls continued to try to pair him with Anna. (Although some were also looking at Lena.)"


• I'm Sure Now, by goodmorninggrayson (COMPLETE!): "Stacy Rowe couldn't stop herself from staring at the alluringly confident Quinn Morgendorffer on the hot pink towel with a smiling sun with black dots for eyes that they currently shared since Quinn had forgotten hers."


• Spider Quinn 14 Battle and Consequence, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "The Griffins were running late. Tom, Linda and Sandi were ready, but Sam and Chris were dragging their heels."

Is It a G'Day?

I don't think Daria is feeling too impressed by Australia Day, but considering she's not Australian I suppose that's only natural. Then again, maybe she's just heard a few too many Crocodile Dundee jokes and is getting fed up with them.

To any married Daria fans, whether or not you're Australian, have a happy Spouse’s Day! Jake and Helen might take a few moments to greet each other today, but I wouldn't count on too much quality time from either of them.

Honestly, maybe we should all just indulge our sweet tooths and celebrate National Peanut Brittle Day instead. I'm sure Trent would be happy to comply, as he's been known to let peanuts hijack his brain.

Fandom News!

• Please don't forget to nominate for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards!


• Discuss television producers whose influence is still felt to this day.


• cortez suggests an alternative rift between Daria and Jane.

They're Just Nuts about Nuts!

Jane is having second thoughts about celebrating National Peanut Butter Day, but I'm sure Daria is relieved to be rid of the thing. Let's hope Trent doesn't smell the peanuts, or else his brain will get hijacked again. Moth to a flame. Et cetera.

The least Jane could do is cheer Daria up with a nice comment in honor of Compliment Day. Perhaps she could praise the peanut butter stain on the back of Daria's pants, or the adorable way she blushes whenever Trent speaks to her. I suspect both remarks would be equally welcome.

Someone should say something encouraging to Mr. DeMartino, too, because it's International Day of Education and I think he could use a little inspiration if he wants to face another classroom full of imbecilic morons. Or is it moronic imbeciles?

Brrrrrrrrrrrrr!

I think Mr. DeMartino waited too long to observe Come in From the Cold Day, but now that he's inside he'll hopefully thaw quickly. I'm going to celebrate by not going out into the cold in the first place if I can possibly help it, and I hope you all stay warm if you can!

Jane and Trent's father is probably outdoors taking photographs, but it may not be cold wherever he is because he could be anywhere in the world. That's okay, though, because it's National Vincent Day and he can celebrate however he wants. Just as long as he keeps his dangerous chemicals out of reach of anyone who might accidentally drink them.

Someone should tell Mrs. Johansen that it's National Polka Dot Day and she can wear her dress with pride. Unless she's already taken Quinn's advice about the vertical stripes.

Fandom News!

• The deadline for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards has been extended. Please nominate if you can!

What Kind of Bird Snuff Film Is This?

Note that this is not the recommended way to celebrate Penguin Awareness Day, but you can't deny that this image is difficult to ignore. I would like to wish certain members of fandom that shall remain nameless a great day!

Speaking of unpleasant things, today is National Charlie Day so maybe we could celebrate by not calling Upchuck by his usual nickname. Then again, if he decides to observe National DJ Day as well, then I make no promises.

In fact, once Upchuck turns his personality on overdrive it might be best for everyone else to celebrate Take A Walk Outdoors Day. I'm sure Mr. DeMartino will be happy to join in, because he's always up for a hike!

Fanfic Update!

• Casual, by janendaria4life (COMPLETE!): "It was somewhere around dusk and Lawndale's spoiled rich boy, Tom Sloane, parked his shitty car in front of the curb of Casa Lane."


• I (Don't) Want to Be a Part of It, by ladyevil (COMPLETE!): "It took a couple of group therapy sessions and hours of debate, but Daria, Quinn and Helen found that there was one thing they could agree on. They all liked to watch The Saturday Sinful Cinema with Lazarus."


• Mysteries of Aurora, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 8): "Freya burst out of her room shortly after 8 o'clock. 'Today is a new day!'"


• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "Quinn felt the tingle as she entered the dining room, where Daria had laid out the documents she had obtained with the fourth vigilante two nights before."


• Teddy the Time Bomb, by wilddogjj (COMPLETE!): "Teddy was now stuck in the principal's office because he'd written a short story for language arts that the teacher found disturbing." (Part 3)

The Many Pitfalls of Caffeine

Daria is enjoying a nice mug of coffee that may or may not be gourmet in honor of National Gourmet Coffee Day, but don't let Quinn catch her drinking it. She'll expound at length on the horrors of dark circles until the coffee is cold.

Can anyone think of any good synonyms for coffee? It's Thesaurus Day and I'd hate to feel that my vocabulary was lacking, flawed, meager, deficient, or inadequate.

On this day in 2002, Daria was featured in an article in Animation Magazine. It looked back at the show's run and discussed the Is It College Yet? movie, and ended on a hopeful note for the show in syndication...which may have been more optimistic than it should have been.

Fandom News!

• If you're going to nominate for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards, you'd better do it soon, because the deadline is tomorrow!


• R.I.P., David Lynch.

Now THAT'S a Dragon Lady!

I don't think anyone's going to risk ignoring Appreciate a Dragon Day, especially with that angry expression on Brittany's face. I'm sure Kevin will find some way to piss her off, though, most likely by cheating on her. With a wyvern.

The good news is that Kevin probably will taste good, especially once she burns him to a crisp. While the snack will certainly be hot, if Brittany wants to celebrate International Hot and Spicy Food Day then she should talk to Jake about borrowing some of his pepper.

Daria, meanwhile, will most likely avoid all of the drama entirely and celebrate National Nothing Day instead. She would do well to remember her own advice: "the negative, which is the nothingness of being and the annihilating power both together, is nothingness."

Fanfic Update!

• The Feast of Lupercal, by Blake C Stacey (BlakeStacey) (COMPLETE!): "Saavik was stepping out of the bathroom and doing up the buttons on her shirt when she smelled what was most definitely coffee."


• Reboot, by roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Tom Sloane woke up in his dorm room at Bromwell. It was the 11,789th time he had done so."


• Teddy the Time Bomb, by wilddogjj (part 1): "Quinn and Jim's son, Teddy, is walking towards his locker at school. Upon reaching said locker, he sighs."

A Shocking Way to Celebrate!

Mr. DeMartino is clearly regretting his decision to celebrate International Kite Day during a thunderstorm, but on the bright side he just discovered a cheap method of resuscitating himself if he suffers another heart attack. If you fly a kite today, please be safe and also watch out for kite-eating trees!

I hope Quinn realizes that, even though it's National Shop For Travel Day, she should exercise restraint and--ha, I'm just kidding. Quinn has no idea how to not shop. At the very least, I hope she doesn't allow her travel gear to replace life-saving supplies.

On this day in 2002, the "Look Back In Annoyance" aired on MTV. It was a half-hour retrospective of the show, but Daria put it much more succinctly as "a cheap-ass clip show."

Fandom News!

• Time is running out to nominate for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards!

A Pint-Sized "Nope."

Young Daria is absolutely not happy about celebrating National Youth Day, but that's okay because Young Quinn is happy enough for both of them. In fact, Young Quinn might be happy enough for the entire world. I'm a little worried that she might explode from joy.

If Daria were feeling affectionate (which is a very big "if" that isn't likely to happen), then she could observe Kiss a Ginger Day. Given the choice, I think she'd be better off kissing Quinn than the other infamous ginger on the show...Upchuck.

Helen, meanwhile, will probably be celebrating neither of those holidays because it's Work Harder Day and that's all the excuse she needs. Then again, I'm not sure if it's physically possible for her to work any harder than she usually does without the use of cloning technology.

Fanfic Update!

• A Real American, by wilddogjj (COMPLETE!): "Jim was with Tony, Eric, Wayne, Bud and Chuck at the shooting range. Jim squeezed off a few rounds from his Beretta handgun."


• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 9): "After finishing her shift, Quinn went up to the roof. But before she changed to SpiderGirl, she looked around at the town."

Helen Would Be So Proud

I don't think that Quinn is having a very good National Shareholders Day, but her employees are having an even worse one. I'd like to imagine that in this scenario Quinn and Sandi are competing business magnates within the same field, each intent on beating the other.

I suppose today would be a good day for these poor terrified souls to consider finding a new job, and not just because it's Quitters Day. This should be a familiar situation for Quinn, who once quit the Fashion Club (although it was under a massive guilt trip) and triggered a total collapse of the club as a result.

Speaking of the Fashion Club, it's also Peculiar People Day and I encourage all of you to be just as peculiar as you want! This should be no problem for Lawndale, which seems to be entirely populated by the most peculiar people you've ever met.

Fandom News!

• Remember to nominate for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards!


• Discuss Justin Trudeau stepping down as leader of the Liberal Party and Prime Minister of Canada.

The King He Is Not

Trent is trying out a new style of music in honor of the anniversary of Elvis Presley's birth on this day in 1935. Unfortunately for Trent, Elvis had actual musical talent, so the homage isn't likely to go very well.

Even so, I expect he'll keep Daria's attention and not just because it's Male Watcher's Day. Jane will probably join in if any cute boys happen by, but only because she's thinking of buying those shoes.

Be sure to dust off those QWERTY skills because it's Typing Day and I want those keys to start clicking! Jake might get distracted by the Panda Cam, but I have no doubt that Quinn will use her favorite emojis: Smiley face, surprised face, wink!

Fanfic Update!

• 15 Years On, by DrT9999 (COMPLETE!): "Even five feet from the mountain's base, Daria wouldn't have guessed there was any sort of usable entrance to a cave system, except for the few traces of footprints in the meager gravel (most of the area was bare rock) leading into a small indentation in the rock face."


• Heavenly wine and roses, by riotsquirrrl (part 5): "The previews for the art house movie theater are pretty basic and flash across the screen, advertising local businesses and coming features. Tom and Daria are the only ones in the theater."


• A Real American, by wilddogjj (part 2): "Jim was angrily pounding on the door to his father's apartment. The reason for Jim's anger was his recent discovery of his true origin."


• The Trials of Miss Morgendorffer, by TrentMckay (COMPLETE!): "The town of Lawndale, nestled among the rolling hills and bramble-choked woods of New England, was not a place for the faint of heart."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have), by roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Sandi Griffin was dead. 'That was to be expected,' she thought. 'Can't live forever, although I was hoping that they would cure that.'"

Awwwwwww!

Helen and Jake are just adorable together for Cuddle Up Day, and they look so happy that it's easy to recognize this as a fantasy sequence rather than real life. I would like to think that Helen and Jake do have their moments of calm and togetherness, at least in between the phone calls from work and rants about childhood.

When they're done with their one-on-one time, they could spend some quality time with Quinn by taking her out for lunch and listening to her poetry in honor of National Take a Poet to Lunch Day! She could even regale them with the greasy fry poem.

Daria, however, would far rather be burned at the stake like Joan of Arc, who was born on this day in 1412. I'm not sure if the prospect of spending time with her family or listening to bad poetry is worse to her, but either one would drive her to, in her own words, order a stake.

Fandom News!

• E. A. Smith wonders how authors deal with bad reviews.


• What is the stupidest rule in sports?


• Nominations for the 2024 Daria Fanworks Awards are open!

Don't Let It Oxidize!

Jake has many regrets, and only the least of them is that he prepared penne on National Spaghetti Day. Trent will be disappointed, too, because spaghetti (or anything similar to it) is his favorite.

Daria and Jane, meanwhile, might spend some time sharing information about the Middle Ages in honor of Trivia Day. No one said that the information had to be accurate, after all.

If they do spend any time at a Medieval fair or any other school event, though, I hope they stay alert because it's World Hypnotism Day and Ms. Li might decide to go behind simple subliminal messages. They don't want to be tithing their earnings to Lawndale High for the rest of their lives.

Fanfic Update!

• 15 Years On, by DrT9999 (part 2): "General John Springfield was not happy, and when a two star general is not happy, his aides and others around him become nervous."


• Daria Considers Change, by DrT9999 (COMPLETE!): "Silence reigned in Jane's bedroom for a moment."


• Daria's Rugrats (IC Runaway Daria), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "Soon, three year old Angelica and her father, Drew, had arrived. She walked over to the playpen area."


• fall in love with a girl, by bea0e (COMPLETE!): "Come on, Jane, you know you’re better than this."


• A Real American, by wilddogjj (part 1): "Jim, Jamie, Chuck and Chris were in Kevin's driveway while Kevin showed off the new license plate on his Dodge Ram."


• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 8): "SpiderGirl and Ninja Talon approached the Oscorp office space from an alleyway."

No One Will Be Saluting Him

On the one hand, I think that someone should explain to Upchuck that Run it up the Flagpole and See if Anyone Salutes It Day isn't meant to be taken literally, and you aren't supposed to run yourself up there. On the other hand, while he's up there he won't be bothering anyone, so maybe we should just let him stay right where he is.

Actually, this would be an interesting way to celebrate World Introvert Day, because there's only room for one person up there so there's no need to worry about being overwhelmed by other people. Daria would be happy enough up there as long as she was able to bring a book.

I hope she chooses a book by Isaac Asimov, because it's both the anniversary of his birth and National Science Fiction Day. Instead of reading a science fiction story, though, Daria could recreate the alien space babes look with Jane. It's probably safe to do so with Upchuck stuck on top of a flagpole.

Fandom News!

• Vote in the Celebrity Deathmatch poll between Maggie Simpson and Stewie Griffin.


• R.I.P., Jimmy Carter and Linda Lavin.


• The 2024 Daria Fanfiction list has been posted.


• cortez is skeptical about Quinn remaining friends with Sandi in the finale.

How About Meditating on Being Less Shallow?

The Fashion Club is enjoying World Peace Meditation Day, but I don't think they have much chance of succeeding. They can't even achieve peace among themselves, let alone the world. Still, for once they're engaging in a hobby that doesn't involve maxing out Jake's credit card, so for that alone we should encourage them.

If they do decide to go shopping today, it will be a relief to Lawndale's most well-known goth that they will not be visiting PayDay. Perhaps we could consider it a National Andrea Day gift!

As we prepare to say goodbye (and possibly good riddance) to 2024, we should try to follow Daria's advice from MTV New Year's Eve 2002: "Well, I think everyone should resolve to be nicer to their neighbors, except for those of us who live next door to relatives. Eat less and exercise more, unless that doesn't appeal to you, in which case you should eat more and exercise less. Be kind to animals, because you never know when they're going to take over. And finally, let's try to make this the best year ever, or at least the least suckiest."

Fanfic Update!

• Back to School, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Kevin trudged through the parking lot toward the school the next morning, trying to keep his mind from wandering back to his football team days. It was like trying to shoo away a swarm of flies with nothing but a toothpick; every time he shoved one thought away, several more crowded in."


• Idiots in Lawndale, by JabeShepherd (COMPLETE!): "Highland High School was already teetering on the edge of collapse, a dilapidated mess of cracked walls, leaky pipes, and floors that seemed to groan under the weight of its own despair."


• Inferior Designers, by SugarfiendSweetieguts (COMPLETE!): "It was an unremarkable weekend morning in the burbs. Jane had some math homework that she could be doing, but Art had sounded its clarion call."


• Mysteries of Aurora, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 7): "Freya opened her eyes as she stepped out of the Coffee House cafeteria and looked across the Plaza at the Library."


• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 7): "Verity had held sessions with various clients over the phone (although one had taken the trouble to drive to and from Lawndale) as she waited for Osborn to be ready for another session."

Hello, Cello!

Don't disturb Brittany right now, because she's concentrating extra hard for International Cello Day. The drama of the moment is lessened somewhat when you find out that she's playing the Lawndale High School song, but musical skill is musical skill regardless.

Someone tell Jake that just because it's Pepper Pot Day doesn't mean he should use the entire pot in his cooking. Less is more, even if Quinn disagrees.

Whaaaaat Tiiiiime Iiiiiis Iiiiiit?

Tiffany is acting even more wooden and artificial than usual because today is the anniversary of the Howdy Doody show, which was released on this day in 1947. She's a perfect match for her fellow marionette, because neither of them have an actual thought in their heads and are happy to let someone else control them.

Jane, meanwhile, might decide to ask Trent to help her celebrate Visit the Zoo Day by taking another ride together. On second thought, seeing the tiger might bring back some unpleasant memories, so she'd probably be better off staying home.

If Helen feels like baking again, it's National Fruitcake Day and fruitcake probably isn't too different from her oatmeal pumpkin seed loaf. I'd rather she make it than Jake, because I'm sure he'd find a way to saturate the thing with pepper.

Fanfic Update!

• Back to School, by Kristen Bealer (parts 1 and 2): "Kevin approached the front doors of Lawndale High School with more than a little apprehension. It had been over ten years since he’d last stepped inside the building, and while the school hadn’t appeared to change, he knew he had. A lot." (Part 2)


• A Lane's Return to Lawndale (Random Pairing Challenge 2020), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "Half an hour later, Summer left the café. She wasn’t sure what to think about Timothy causing her heart to flutter."


• Merry Christmas, Melody, by roentgen (COMPLETE!): "It was Christmas! The Morgendorffer family gathered Christmas morning to 'claim the loot' as Daria liked to put it."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have), by roentgen (COMPLETE!): "It was a dim grey morning in New York City. Tom Sloane, CEO of GoodHealthPlus, ambled toward the Lincoln Center, getting ready to announce a 10.5 percent increase in profit from the last quarter achieved by a) setting up an AI tool to not only deny claims faster, but fire hundreds of claim managers, and b) setting up a new hotline for customers which trapped them in a fiendish hell of waiting for one of the few live operators left."

Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

Mrs. Bennett is indulging in a little extra holiday cheer in honor of Christmas, or maybe she and Herbert are into some unusual fantasies. Not for me to judge, either way. Remember to share your sugar-coated cookies with X, and maybe give him a little cottage all made out of gingerbread if you have one.

If you're in the mood for some Christmas fan-fiction, you can find a whole lot of them amongst the holiday-themed stories on Outpost Daria Reborn.

To make today extra festive, Hanukkah begins tonight at sunset. May all those in fandom who celebrate it have a wonderful Festival of Lights!

A Fish For the Rest of Us!

Mack looks pretty proud of his catch, but he's got a long way to go before he beats the awesome size of the first live coelacanth, which was caught on this day in 1938. Now that is a big fish story!

It's a little cold right now for anything but ice fishing, but perhaps we could celebrate Festivus instead! If you don't have any grievances to air then I envy you, but I also recommend you celebrate by reading Bettie and Jack at Festivus by Gene.

Fanfic Update!

• Sloane Trauma: The Next Generation (Scenes no Daria fanfic Should Have: How did We survive?), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Mason, what is wrong with you?' Lillyanne asked as she entered the dining room of Sloane Manor."


• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 6): "The Enigma arrived at the Strawberry and started using the telescopes. Soon, she saw something. She recognised it straight away."

Don't Go Into the Light!

It would seem that Lawndale is having a very special National Flashlight Day, and the neighbors are sure to be alarmed. Even if they don't assume aliens are invading, they'll be at least a little curious about why the shrubbery is glowing.

It's possible that someone is taking a literal approach to Look on the Bright Side Day, and given the typical brainpower of Lawndale residents it wouldn't surprise me. I hope you can find a bright side today, even if things are a little rough right now.

The good news for me is that it's Short Girl Appreciation Day, and at five feet two inches I definitely qualify for some appreciation! Daria, being the same height, should also get her share of attention even though I'm sure she'd prefer to be left alone.

It's Even Pre-Decorated For Your Convenience!

Daria's about to have the fastest and easiest Look for an Evergreen Day ever, because all she has to do is turn around. Unfortunately, there is pretty much zero chance that the tree is a real evergreen, because it's the same Christmas tree that we see in the Morgendorffers' garage in a later episode. Good effort, though!

While we're getting into the Christmas spirit, let's indulge a sweet tooth with National Hard Candy Day! If you don't have any, just attend a Lawndale High School parade and wait for the football team to start throwing treats at the crowd. Hopefully they'll take out one or both of Sandi's brothers again.

For those who'd rather watch a disaster than participate in it, may I recommend watching the movie Titanic on the anniversary of its release on this day in 1997? Ms. Barch and Mr. O'Neill might try to re-create the famous "I'm flying" scene but with any luck someone will push them both into the water.

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Enrolls At Nevermore: An Experiment, by Meester_Lee (part 15): "The stress had been getting to her throughout the summer: her oldest daughter setting off to a new boarding school, her youngest daughter preparing for another year at the Berkshire Institute, and Quinn trying to cope with mourning the loss of her father and changing the direction of her life from social butterfly to a hard-working student preparing to get into medical school."


• The Lawndale Businesswomen's Association, by Buffcoat (COMPLETE!): "The room is filled with successful businesswomen, all chatting and networking. Linda Griffin, the president, stands at the podium."


• Mysteries of Aurora, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 6): "Alexia saw that Freya was a little different and it wasn't just her pink hair and the energy she exuded. It was obvious that her focus wandered."

Ready for Takeoff!

Quinn is suited up and ready to take flight on Pan American Aviation Day, and she'd better hurry up before the Fashion Club sees what she's wearing. Stacy would be horrified that those pants make her look like she has saddlebags. Or is it carpetbags?

For those who'd rather keep their feet on the ground, there's also the Festival of Winter Walks. Daria and Jane will pass on this one, because while their last trek through the snow unearthed some real insights into each other's souls like their M&M color preferences, it really isn't an experience they'd care to repeat.

I imagine it goes without saying that Helen will be celebrating National Device Appreciation Day, mostly by spending the entire day on her cell phone. I can't imagine what her life would be like without devices, and I imagine the advent of smartphones has only made her work life even more intense.

Fandom News!

• Azul has posted a GlitterBerries copy for posterity.

Hey, Look! It's the Latest Florida Man!

Kevin's looking especially suave as Don Johnson, who was born on this day in 1949. I think Miami Vice was about the only crime-solving show that didn't get parodied in "Murder, She Snored," but Kevin would have had a hard time playing both a detective and a dead body, so it's probably just as well.

At least he wouldn't have had to portray a Southern belle, because today is also the anniversary of the premiere of the movie Gone with the Wind on this day in 1939. I can't really picture Jane telling him that he grows lovelier by the day. Dumber, perhaps, but not lovelier.

In non-entertainment news, today is National Cupcake Day and I hope everyone can have a sweet treat today to celebrate. Kevin, when he's done pretending to be a Miami cop, can remind Brittany that she's still a great Hostess Cupcake.

Fanfic Update!

• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 5): "Daria was impressed. Brittany had deduced as much as she had, although her word choices were not as eloquent as hers."

Giddy-Up!

Helen and Jake have chosen what might be the strangest method of celebrating National Horse Day that I've ever seen, but to each his own I suppose. I suspect Daria will be staying far away from any real horses, thanks to her unpleasant experience at Camp Grizzly.

She would probably rather stay home with a good book, and perhaps a nice warm beverage in honor of National Cocoa Day. Quinn can even tell her about that family of teenagers and their harrowing experience with a hurricane where cocoa made them feel better and Daria's kicking her out of the room already.

If cocoa isn't your thing, you could eat a cold sweet treat instead because it's Ice Cream Day! Mack the ice cream man will probably be along shortly with his little hat and bell that goes ding-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling. A-ling.

Fandom News!

• Suggest female Daria characters for a football team in roentgen's new thread, Daria - Beyond the basic nine.


• BloodyWilliam introduces an upcoming art project: Daria character tarot: Major Arcana.

Dancing Cheek to Mane

I see Daria is sharing a dance with the Lawndale Lions mascot for Tango Day, and I'm a little curious: when a teenager holding toilet paper dances with a giant lion, who leads? Anyway, this will probably be the shortest tango ever danced, because if Mr. O'Neill doesn't suffocate first, then Daria's boots will take care of the situation.

I'm sure Mr. O'Neill would rather endure the humiliation and restricted airflow of a lion costume than go on another Lawndale's Wilderness Adventure Club trip, even if it's International Mountain Day. If nothing else, at least he gets to keep his underwear on in the costume...or at least I hope he does.

Finally, I hope Helen withdraws that planned lawsuit against UNICEF, because today is the organization's birthday. It was created on this day in 1946 and has earned countless pennies to help children around the world since.

Fanfic Update!

• Bigger and Brighter and Wider Than Snow, by elle_stone (part 27): "Her parents used to live on a commune in the late 60s. Then the infighting got bad and the art started to suffer, so they dropped out, went up to Canada for a while–knowing them, without papers."


• How to Train Your Dragon: Berk in Time, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "The Riders landed on the top deck. They quickly noticed that it wasn’t made of wood, rather it seemed to be composed of some metal or other."


• Twas the Fight Before Christmas, by wilddogjj (COMPLETE!): "Snow is falling over Lawndale Mall. Combined with the Christmas decorations, this makes it visually obvious that it's December." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have), by roentgen (COMPLETE!): "(Daria, Quinn, Jane, and Stacy are stowaways on a luxury boat cruise. The problem is that the cruise is over, and without a passport to disembark they are in serious trouble.)"

Lost and Fraud?

Ms. Li is having a rough time because she just found out that it's International Anti-Corruption Day and that's going to put a real hitch in her usual pro-corruption plans. Still, I don't suppose she's actually going to do anything drastic like stop embezzling funds. Someone has to feed those bomb-sniffing dogs!

Has anyone seen Tad Gupty? It's Lost and Found Day and I'm hoping that he falls into the latter category right now. If not, just send Daria after him and remind her to look for windmills.

If she ends up at Art in the Park she should also look for some of those crying clowns because it's Weary Willie Day and he was the original sad clown. Fortunately, he was sad but not dead, so he could still clown and we'll still be freakin' friends.

Fandom News!

• Discuss the United Healthcare CEO murder.


• Talk about an article about disabled veterans from The Economist.

She's Looking Very...SHARP!

Brittany has traded in her pom poms for shears in order to celebrate the anniversary of the movie Edward Scissorhands, which was released on this day in 1990. I think she's even more unhappy about the loss of her cheerleader uniform, though, because black is hardly a cheerful color. Still, if anyone can keep her bouncity-bounce under these circumstances, she can.

I hope she doesn't try to send any long distance messages for Letter Writing Day, though. Not only will it be nearly impossible for her to hold a pencil now, but I'm sure her spelling and grammar are just awful.

There's also no way she's going to be able to celebrate International Civil Aviation Day by flying anywhere, because can you imagine trying to pass through a metal detector like that? Lucky for Jake and Daria on their next flight; it will be free of any squeaky voices...except for Jake's when they hit turbulence.

Fanfic Update!

• Mysteries of Aurora, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 5): "'Welcome to Introduction to Nordic History of Aurora, where you'll learn that the period is much more complex than just "Vikings take over most of Aurora and then the Unification happens." I'm Professor Erik Brynjarsson.'"


• OverhydraTed (The Ted Zone), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'Good morning, Ted.' Ted looked up from his locker to see Jodie standing next to him, looking a little wary."


• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "'Ah!' Daria called out as she reached the ground a little quickly. 'Sorry,' the Enigma said. 'I’m still getting used to this.'"

Like, Hi-YAH!

Sandi is preparing her best martial arts moves in honor of International Ninja Day, but she's going to be disappointed when she finds out that the point of being a ninja is to remain unseen. For someone who loves to be the center of attention, this would probably be absolute torture.

Then again, with her newfound stealth she could find all sorts of new and creative ways to sabotage Quinn. For example, since it's also National Blue Jeans Day she could sneak electrical tape into the Morgendorffers' laundry and ruin Quinn's new new new jeans.

I would have hoped that she'd have chosen instead to use her abilities to do good deeds, especially because it's International Volunteer Day. On second thought, Sandi's attempts to help others don't go very well, as that plaque on the girl's restroom mirror can attest to.

Fandom News!

• Discuss the martial law declaration in South Korea and its aftermath.

It's Not National Roof ON Your Head Day!

Daria is checking the library to make sure she's still going to be able to celebrate National Roof over Your Head Day, which is wise considering Ms. Li's financial priorities when it comes to the school. It might be better to just get out of there and celebrate at home where the roof is more likely to stay put.

On the way she might consider doing a good deed or donating to a worthy cause because it's also National Day of Giving. The Fashion Club will be happy to chip in a belly chain and a pair of go-go boots but no one will be happy to receive them.

Perhaps Jake will take the opportunity to give Helen another candle for Candle Day! Hopefully this one will look like something other than a creepy misshapen hunk of wax.

Fanfic Update!

• Mysteries of Aurora, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "Freya emerged from her room, ready for the day. She took out the schedule."


• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "Daria and Jane arrived at the Historia. 'So, what did you find?' Jane asked as they entered."

Maybe Try Painting With Your Other Hand For Awhile?

Jane had better suck it up and push past the pain in her arm because it's Day Without Art Day and I'm sure she doesn't want to celebrate. After all, any artist can tell you that the best art comes out of suffering.

Daria should probably offer her some encouraging words since it's National Women Support Women Day, but I don't think she actually knows any encouraging words. At the very least she could offer her some raw cookie dough and make a joke to take her mind off the pain.