Double, Double Toil and Trouble

Tonight is Walpurgis Night, a holiday celebrated in parts of Europe. It's a spring festival associated with the supernatural and often involves costumes, bonfires, and dancing. Sounds fun, although I don't think Quinn would be amused by how much the Three Js are getting into it.

Today is also the 208th anniversary of the signing of the Louisiana Purchase Treaty. It not only doubled the size of the United States, but also tied in strongly with Manifest Destiny--but I'll leave Daria to describe that in greater detail!

New Fanfic!

• God Save The Esteem ep29: Daria's High Score, by Charles RB (part 1): "Two weeks later, O'Neill burst into Daria's class, crying out 'Daria! You'll never guess who's by the phone waiting to hear from you!' – and unfortunately, the class was Gym and, specifically, the changing rooms. The stares of two dozen girls registered with him too late. 'I... I... um... oh dear.'"


• Ixmythot (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by Ixmythot (COMPLETE!): "Anthony chuckled, an honest chuckle at that, as he continued, his tic calming with the last of the more painful students gone, "No Andrea, this is something more important than a by, or a missed test. I noticed a certain Symbol on one of your tests, and I have to ask you something: What does the term "Ixmythot" mean to a young woman such as yourself?""


• Life After Highland Ch. 1: Rush This!, by LadieT (part 2): "Daria watched Brittany as she slowly made her way to the store's exit. Feeling a slight tinge of regret, Daria caught up with the cheerleader. 'Look, if we get finished with everything here before midnight, I might show up - but I won't stay long. Half hour to an hour tops.'"


• Mad Dog's Legacy Chapter 8: Adult Supervision, by Hyrin (part 4): "The Morgendorffers, along with Jane, were shuffled out by the nurses, and Daria lay back on the bed, trying to get some sleep. She lay still, with her eyes closed, trying to relax, when she heard footsteps in the doorway. Looking over, she saw Mack standing there, watching her. 'Hey,' he said when she opened her eyes."


• Not So Different 10: Leniency For A Second Offender, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "As the three figures came up the path, Quinn could see that Sonny was limping and the driver was helping to support him. Sonny was speaking in a low voice, and she half-heard and half-guessed that he was telling the other two that he could manage. The scruffy guy was telling Sonny that it was no problem. Quinn stepped out from behind the bush to find out how bad the damage was and decided, judging from times Sonny had got into trouble before, that it was only minor. The guy supporting Sonny looked at her and said, 'Hey.'"


• Not So Different 11: Older Male Siblings, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "'All the way to Swedesville?' said Sonny. ‘For a music festival?' 'It's not a special occasion or anything. We'd just be hanging out for a while. Of course', Jane went on, 'we'd understand if it would interfere with your busy social schedule.' Sonny had to give in."


• Paisley Gal (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by paisleygal (COMPLETE!): "Travis sat at a small table in the back corner of the bar. He had an open bottle of beer in front of him, but he was more interested in watching the people in the bar than in drinking tonight. He sighed as he watched the couples doing the two-step to a George Strait hit. His friends had told him he was a fool to fall for some fancy city gal from Lawndale, but he couldn't help it. From the moment he first laid eyes on her, he knew that she was the one."


• Promises, by LadieT (epilogue): "'I just wanted to thank you again for taking such good care of Cleo. I know it wasn't exactly something you wanted to do - ' 'That's not true, Quinn. I made that promise because I wanted to be there for her if she needed me. I love you, sis.' 'I love you, too. And Jane as well. - I mean I would be so lost right now without you guys.' 'It's going to be okay, Quinn. Just remember, we're here for you. Who knows, maybe someday, we'll need you to return the promise,' Jane said."


• Quinn's Code - 02: Invite of the Geek, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 7): "'Have you done any dance lessons?' she asked. 'Well, no,' Sandi admitted. 'Then you have no right to say that our dancing is abominable!' Kristen said. 'That should make her think!' 'You mean that you have?' Tori asked. 'Of course,' Kristen said. She grabbed the approaching Joey and began to waltz with him. He was so shocked that it took about 15 seconds for him to respond."


• Royal Wedding (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'And do you, Prince Thomas, Duke of Brittingham, Earl of Cloves, Earl of Watercress, Earl of Hines, Count of Basie, Baron of Munchhausen, Essence of Myrrh, Knight of the Garter Belt, Cab of Calloway, Satchmo of Armstrong, and Elf of Keebler take this woman, Daria Precious Morgendorffer, as your lawful wedded wife, to have, to hold, and to never make any reference whatsoever to her unfortunate middle name?'"


• Rude Awakening Episode 3: Drive, by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "DANI: You know if Jodie heard that, she would of flipped out. Mack was a NFL player and the reason why Jodie was so pissed at him was because she told me he dumped her the second he was drafted. STACY: He dumped Jodie the second he got successful? DANI: Exactly." (Part 15)


• The T Virus, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Damnit, Daria, there's an outbreak going on!' Daria sighed and closed her book; she'd clearly be spending the next few minutes massaging her father's latest paranoid fear. 'Okay, dad, an outbreak of what?' 'The T virus! There are zombies EVERYWHERE! I almost DIED!'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: "Ghetto" Daria), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Tom whistled at the parade. 'It is a stunning array of pod people.' 'Two more minutes,' said Daria."


• Vigilante Shift: Double Docked (Non-Daria), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'What are you doing?' 'I'm broodin',' she murmurred to the voice in her ear. 'It's what superheroes are s'posed to do. We brood on rooftops.' An exasperated sigh, then, 'Yes, and you are also supposed to capture criminals, as I recall. They don't capture themselves, you know.' ''Cept that one time.'"


• Way Too Cute, by Smijey: "Daria smiled -- wide. Quinn was perturbed seeing the unfamiliar gesture on Daria's face (and a little revolted at how perfect even her sister's teeth were). 'Don't you get it, Quinn? For the first time in my whole damn life, somebody looked PAST my appearances!' "And they thought you stank!" Quinn added. That did not deter Daria from giving Quinn a great big hug, though. 'Aggh! What are you doing!' Quinn flailed and tried to escape, but it was no use."


• Worldburner: The Fixer VS the Final Countdown, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Three and a half minutes left to save the world.' Dr Charles Ruttheimer, Extradimensional Handyman – crossworld 'fixer' for hire – grinned. 'Time to get feisty.'"


• Worldburner: They Were Nine, by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "Judith's expression hardened, causing Neely to start crying again. Judith blinked and winced as the pain returned, whatever trance the baby had put on her breaking. She got to her feet and looked down at Daria, who looked back up with an expression of dread. Judith look a deep breath and let it out through her nose. 'There's other survivors in Swedesville,' she said quietly. 'About thirty or so. They've made camp by a stream with clean water. I was going to burn them out but...'"

We've Come a Long Way, Baby!

Exactly one year ago today, the very first Daria DVD sets were received by fans. Hooray!

So, what has changed since that momentous DVD release? I have several thoughts, but I'd rather open it up for discussion. What effect do you think the DVDs have had on fandom? Talk about it in the comments while I update the latest news:

• News and reactions are being shared about the tornadoes in the Southern U.S.


• Interested in attending or helping to organize Midwest Dariacon 2011? Post in the thread!


• Derek posted some exciting news about space exploration.


• What are your top 10 movies you don't ever want to watch?


• The latest Doctor Who episode is being discussed now.


• GardenStateMachine is looking for recommendations for running music.


• Some new activities in the Creative Writing forum: GlitterShrooms's Daria: The Last Woman. IC/Discussion and psychotol's God sez: (Round robin challenge: Why would she do this?).

Express Yourself Using Medium Rare!

Today is World Graphics Day, a day to celebrate the use of graphic design in communication. Or, as Jane would put it, "This is going to be fun: you doing words, me pictures. It's exciting." Either way, it's an opportunity to get creative. Be graphic!

Um...not that kind of "graphic," though.

Fanfic Update!

• Alone in Crowds (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by Charles RB (COMPLETE): "Jane had seen the new girl, this Daria Morgendorffer, react fast to the teacher's question and come up with the right answer – and then, after giving an accurate description of manifest destiny as the belief of America's destiny to expand, add in 'but I imagine if they'd seen this class they'd have not thought that'. Whether that was a dig at the students or DeMartino, Jane didn't know, but even Kevin could've told you that DeMartino would think it was a dig at him. Which, of course, he took out on the rest of the class with a surprise quiz tomorrow. Thank you, Ms Morgendorffer. Just what she needed."


• Chair Resurrection (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by the Quiet reader (COMPLETE!): "Trent Lane wakes up in a room. He looks around to see an egg at his feet. Beside him lay a dead facehugger and a half eater rare burger. 'What's going on here?' He questioned but nobody seemed to be around."


• Daria, or the Confession of a Single Lonely Male, by Arena del Sur (parts 7 and 8): "How the look of my dear love's name even affixed to some old hag of a editor, still makes me rock with helpless pain! Perhaps, she might have be a writer too. Born 1982. Inspired (I notice the slip of my pen in the preceding paragraph, but please do not correct it, Lisandro) The Murdered Journalist. Oh, my Daria, I not even have words to play with!"


• Don’t Look Back (Long Story Challenge #2), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "'Penny! Where're you off to?' 'Dominican Republic,' she replied shortly. 'They have wonderful beaches there. Have fun!' The door slammed with her exit, and Penny Lane was not seen on that continent again for a decade."


• Falling Short (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "As Stacy followed her new friends to the school's main doors, she happened to glance aside. A girl with shoulder-length black hair was sitting cross-legged on the top step, sketching in a large book. When Stacy abruptly halted, the girl looked up and their eyes met."


• Fighting Lawndale (Iron Chef: Lawndale Fighters), by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE): "I survived this school for two years now. I have learned a lot. About survival. About fighting. About respect. I could go to any other school, my grades are good enough, I could go to any boarding school I like, my family is rich enough. But I won't. I hate this place and I love it in the same moment. I don't get beat up by football players, I lose in fights against them There is a difference, a big one. Because sometimes I win."


• Ginger Love (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by GingerLove84 (COMPLETE!): "Mack groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose as a brawl threatened to explode. 'Guys....GUYS!' Mack bellowed, shocking them into silence. 'My point is... why do you do it? What is so special about Quinn that makes you all act like buffoons?'"


• God Save The Esteem ep 28: Punk Takes A Holiday, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Quinn!' snapped Daria down the phone. 'Did you know supernatural entities were hiring Dad?!' 'Well gawd Daria, don't you pay attention during breakfast? He mentioned the Holidays four fucking times this week.' She thought back over the last week. She remembered hearing something over breakfast, but she'd long ago developed the skill of not hearing a single blessed thing her family said in the morning." (Part 3)


• God sez (Round robin challenge: Why would she do this?), by psychotol: "'Can you hear?' asked the pastor. 'I can hear,' said the 'Formally' deaf man."


• Guinipigs (AUs, Brain Farts and other stuff), by Wassersauefer (part ): "'So, you're a triplet and have yet a younger sister?' 'Three actually.' 'Damn, your father must feel outnumbered.' 'My brothers helps him to fight off the female influence.' 'So you're what, seven kids?' 'Eight.'"


• Historical Inaccuracies (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'You know what William Tecumseh Sherman's going to do now? He's going to go out onto the battlefield and check out his new artillery piece. He's going to read the letter from President Lincoln and think of all the people who admire him. But you wouldn't know anything about that. You're one of those secessionist dudes, always moping about what a cruel country the United States is, making a big deal about it so people won't notice that you're a loser.'"


• Hobbitdale Part 2: Friends with a Half Elf (Iron Chef: Tall Daria), by cfardell_Brenorenz29: "Half an hour later, after driving away a couple of Orcs whom had tried to foreclose on the Lanes (Jane’s parents were somewhere in Harafrica), Jane and Daria were eating pizza in the kitchen. 'So, your mother’s an Elf?' Jane asked."


• Irreverence (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): "'See what happens when you don't listen to me.' Tom replied ambivalently as he looked at the object in his ends. His bravado aside, he could scarcely believe it either. Sitting just before his hands was something Tom could have never dreamed of. Bathed in a glowing light, and with faint sounds of heavenly choirs, was a footed cup, or chalice, if Tom's history was correct."


• Jim North, The Newer Kid (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'Who is that?' Jane asked in wonder, a tone unusual enough to actually cause Daria to look up from her locker and glance around. Her glance immediately turned into a stare as she laid eyes on the more gorgeous hunk of man she had ever seen walk the halls of Lawndale High. Or anywhere else, for that matter. He was an Adonis, allowed to walk the earth so that all others might share in his beauty."


• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin's Genie (Chapter 3), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "'What are we going to do about about it?' Kristen asked, not sure how the local urban legends that she knew of would be connected to Sandi's mysterious power. 'Keep an eye out for other unusual happenings that cannot be explained by the genie?' Jennifer wondered. 'Good idea, Ms Burns!' Mr DeMartino said. 'What else do we do now?' Kristen asked. 'Wait and see what happens next,' Mr DeMartino said."


• Mad Dog's Legacy Chapter 8: Adult Supervision, by Hyrin (parts 2 and 3): "'We don’t normally allow sitters to use the phone, but your mother told us that you might need…assistance, so feel free to call your house whenever you need. Now, here’s your schedule. As you can see, we've broken everything down into fifteen minute increments. Let's review it together.' They spent several minutes reviewing the paper, leaving Daria amazed at the precision with which it was planned. There was even a 15-minute window set aside for 'Spontaneous Activities.'" (Part 3)


• Mane Joemerl Back! (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "Twelve-year-old Joey Black sat in the office, squinting hard at a piece of paper as he held his finger under a word. The counselor leaned over her desk, frowning, as Mr. and Mrs. Black gave each other nervous glanced."


• Man of the House (My Best Friend 2), by Smijey (part 1): "I heard low talking in the kitchen area, and lowered my guard (by just a hair), as I recognized Daria as one of the voices. She didn't sound frightened, so I walked into the kitchen to see who our guest was. She looked up at me and, to my surprise, managed a cordial smile. She had hardly changed in the intervening fifteen years. 'Hello, Jake,' Helen greeted. 'You'll never guess who I ran into today at the courthouse.' Daria's flair for sarcasm and understatement was genetic, you see."


• Not So Different 6: False Flag Operation, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Jane turned away from Sonny and picked up his magazine. 'What's this? Mercenary Times?' 'It's a bit like Soldier of Fortune. You know, that magazine that ...' Jane cut him off. 'You don't need to explain what Soldier of Fortune is.' She flipped through the pages. 'I didn't know there were others.'"


• Not So Different 7: Surgical Strike, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "'There's a blonde here to see you, sport, and I think she's a looker!' Sonny indulged himself in a wince, knowing his father wouldn't notice. 'Does she look like a cheerleader?' 'A cheerleader, too! Way to go, sport! I knew my boy had it in him!' 'Dad, that's Brittany. She's the dimwitted millstone that my teacher foisted on me as a deadweight partner for this lab project.'"


• Not So Different 8: Wisdom Of The Ages, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "The news that Sonny was going babysitting for the Guptys apparently didn’t filter through to his father, because as he was about to leave the house on Saturday evening Jake asked him where he was going on couples therapy night. When Sonny explained about the babysitting, Jake said ‘Babysitting? But isn’t Quinn the babysitter? Is that really your sort of thing?’ Oh no, thought Sonny. One of those conversations."


• Not So Different 9: See What You Want To See, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Kevin’s interaction with Stoller had begun with the most basic possible misunderstanding: he had introduced himself to her as ‘the QB’, and still had not realised that when she addressed him as ‘Cubie’, it was because she thought that was his name. (He wasn’t the only student she’d renamed. When Sonny had identified himself to her, she’d said, ‘Sunny. That sounds like a hippie name. I think I’ll call you Sally. So much nicer.’ Sonny had seen no percentage in struggling against this.)"


• Oath (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by Lord Yellowtail (COMPLETE!): "It was an absurd, crazy idea, full of possible pitfalls and unseen traps. And Question's cynicism and Power Girl's well-justified paranoia aside, it was the best idea any of them had that didn't involve some sort of massive fraud, or, worse, a reality show. And as the Earth's eight most powerful superheroes talked, deep in the bowels of an abandoned, condemned, burnt out husk of a Denny's, a plan had been worked out. A great and terrible plan that was sure to bite them all in the ass in unforeseen and exciting ways, but in the end, it'd been an 8-0 vote in favor."


• Pashupati (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by Pashupati (COMPLETE!): "'Why are we there, anyway?' 'Well, the Pashupatinath Temple kicked us out after finding out we weren't hindu.'"


• Passion of Revenge (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by the Quiet reader (COMPLETE!): "Reading through a book while sitting in the library he glances up to see a puzzling sight. Two individuals who tried to look like spies were checking out a book which caused the librarian to choke. One was obviously Brittany with her bright blonde hair sticking out under her hat. The other looked kind of like a cross of Sandi with Stacy's pigtails. After a few minutes they left and he went back to reading away till his cell phone went off and he answered it."


• Pie Pie My Darling VS My Best Friend (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Daria nodded quickly and waddled to the back of the truck, trying not to notice the rude gesture he gave to emphasise his 'joke'. Jane looked up at her, tears in her one good eye; Daria mouthed 'I'm not leaving you alone'. And then sat on something. She sniffed: peanut butter?"


• Promises, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "A few minutes later, Quinn began to tire. She lifted her daughter's hand to her lips and kissed it. Cleo didn't want to leave, but knew that her mom needed sleep. Cleo waved and blew her mom a kiss as Jane wheeled her out of the room. Daria bent down and gave her sister a gentle hug. 'Take good care of her. I love you,' Quinn whispered."


• Quinn's Code - 02: Invite of the Geek, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 6): "'You know, Tori, that Vice-President position is still open.' 'Really?' Tori asked, whilst in thought. 'Yes. You can, like, help me with my plan for the destruction of that geek's popularity,' Sandi said. Tori didn't hesitate. 'I'm in.' Sandi shook her hand. 'Welcome to the Fashion Club, Tori Jericho.' Something about Sandi's demenor unnerved Tori. 'What have I just gotten myself into?' she wondered."


• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (part 46): "'You were great, Daria,' he typed as fast as his fingers allowed. 'Yeah!' Elvis stood beside him, laughing. 'We couldn't have done it without you, Daria.' "Uhh, thanks." Daria's cheeks flushed red from the embarrassment of being the center of attention. 'I just did what you asked me to do.'"


• Remembrance, by HolyGrail2007 (part 11): "'But if you own these warehouses, perhaps you can tell me who owns the one I'm interested in.' Mister Sloane paused for the longest time. In truth, he didn't have to cooperate: Kim had no search warrant, to begin with. 'Well, you should know I rent these out. Why don't we go back into my office and I can take a look.' Mister Sloane gave a friendly smile, and now Kim was sure that kind of guy would be just the type for Daria. "


• Reunion, by Hyrin (part 2): "Numbly, Daria walked into the hospital room. Jane lay on the bed in front of her, asleep. Numerous half-healed cuts littered her face, and her left arm was sealed in a cast. The most striking change, moreso than the long black hair Jane now sported, was the obvious spot where the blanket was no longer held up by a right leg. 'Pretty bad, huh?' A soft voice said over her shoulder. She stiffened, trying to push back memories."


• Roentgen (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Your geiger counter, Mr. White, is broken. Aside from a few grams of test material, nothing in this room is radioactive.' 'Yeah,' Jamie said. 'Besides, I got this from Ted DeWitt-Clinton, so you know that it's got to be working.' Everyone looked at each other. Ted DeWitt-Clinton would never let a geiger counter go bad. Not on his watch."


• Rude Awakening Episode 3: Drive, by DIsaac (parts 10 - 13): "SANDI: What did Jeffy do to put himself over the top with you? QUINN: What he did was awesome and thoughtful. STACY: I want details!" (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13)


• A Rude Awakening X-tra (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "JANE: You bastards. When I said I had a fear of dogs, it didn't mean LET DO A STUNT WITH JANE INVOLVING DOGS!!!!"


• Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "'But I just don't know exactly what I have to do.' 'Tell you what, I'll step next door and put together a guide for you.' 'Oh, just great. It's bad enough I'm couldn't do this on my own, now I'm going to get a copy of "Life Creation for Dummies"!'"


• Second Chance for Tommy, by Wassersauefer: "Finally he found himself on the sidelines of the football stadium again. Although he had no idea how that had happened - he did not remember walking back - he did not really care anymore. There was only one explanation and he did not like it one bit. He was in Hell. He was dead. Closing his eyes he sat down on the ground and began crying."


• Song of the South (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Satisfied, Helen left her suitcases by the welcome mat and opened the door. 'Jake! Daria! Quinn! I'm home!' Daria and Jane bounded down the stairs. 'Why shut my mouth and call me cornpone,' Daria said with an accent distinctly rural and monotone. 'I do believe it's my dear old mother.'"


• Temppeli (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by Temppeli (COMPLETE!): "'I still wonder why you took that Finnish class, Daria,' asked Jane, who sitted behind the table against Daria, holding a book. 'BFAC has a huge variety of languages, and this language was Tolkien's interest. Please ask those words, Jane. I have a word quiz tomorrow,' Daria demanded."


• Tridecadal, by RLobinske (part 5): "'Happy birthday,' Michael whispered to Daria after hitting the snooze button on the alarm clock. 'It's a birthday,' Daria said, still wrapped in their blankets. 'Happy is still to be determined.'"


• Two Girls, a Guy and a Pizza Place, by TheExcellentS (COMPLETE!): "'I don't get it, Daria. Why are you being so hard on Jake?' 'I'm just trying to make sure that nothing goes wrong,' Daria said in reply, 'You know what his reputation is like.' 'I think you're just refusing to believe that his reputation might have changed for the better, and I can't for the life of me understand why.' Daria sighed, as a clap of thunder rumbled outside. 'I know he's better than ever with his cooking, Jane. But I just can't shake the feeling that something is going to wrong eventually.'" (Part 6)


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: "Ghetto" Daria), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Tom stared in incomprehending awe at Mystik Mayhem, the Zon, the people in the Zon, and even the graffiti on the ceiling that said 'REMEMBER TEDDY-BOY DW-C'. After a while, his mouth began to work and he said the first thing that came to mind: 'Holy crap.'"


• Unnamed story (IRON CHEF - 'Legionnaires on the Air-!'), by psychotol (COMPLETE!): "'Who, is, deadliest?' The voiceover was done over some stock footage from the VR matches that had been released by the USAES and Xavier's Danger Room for the show." (Roentgen's epilogue)


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Stacy's Mom, Where Are You?), by Chris Tucker (COMPLETE!): "'Who am I? I'm the goddamned BATGIRL!. Now talk or hit the sidewalk head first!'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by psychotol (COMPLETE!): "Jane, now stood at the door, asked 'Where you taking them?' 'Mortuary, don't worry, he's done.' 'Done with what?' 'Existing.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Fashion Centipede), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Kevin looked at Daria and Jane expectantly, like a beloved puppy who's just killed the baby during a bit of play and thought it hadn't done any wrong. The two girls gazed in dull horror at the writhing mass that Kevin had created with a lot of time and superglue. It was...roughly in the shape of a human, and it wore very pretty clothes (the Cashman's tags still hanging off most of them). A blonde wig topped it off."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "Trent opened the Classified ads and skimmed down to one specific ad:"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by J-D (COMPLETE!): "The interviewer leaned back in his chair. 'So, why don't you start by telling me what first got you interested in the possibility of a career with the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention?'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "Yes, switching over from homeschooling was indeed the right choice, he had decided. Unfortunately, one of the downsides was that the school was much larger than his house, and he didn't quite know where everything was yet. After getting turned around for the fourth time in the maze-like halls, he stopped another student to ask directions to his next class."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Name Game), by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane were sitting in the cafeteria eating lunch when Kevin stood up to do his daily lunch dance offering to the gods. Sighing in agitation, Daria pulled out a tiny pistol and fired it at Kevin. He fell to the ground and immediately started twitching. Daria slid the Deringer-size stun gun back into her coat pocket."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: What's behind Alter Egos?), by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "Daria's eyes widened. 'I can't believe this.' 'Yeah, I know. The head is too small.' 'The head---Jane, this thing is as big as the real Sphinx! How did you manage to do this in just one semester?!'"


• Unnamed story (Long Story Challenge 3, Round 2), by Hyrin: "'Tell me again the fancy name you came up to describe it in that paper you wrote for Sick Sad World?' 'Orgasmically-induced chrono-variance detection.' 'Which is a fancy way of saying I see the future when I get off. I love it!'"


• Winter Interludes, by Chris Tucker: "Connie's crutch occupied the 4th seat. (You would have thought that someone as smart as Connie would have realized that snow and ice on a sidewalk would equal 'slippery as hell'. But no. 19 years living on the Gulf Coast, where ice was something you put in your drink, had not prepared her for life in New England. A badly twisted ankle and spectacularly bruised and colorful bottom was her object lesson.)"


• Worldburner: A Demonstration of Anger, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "The sky behind them lit up as if the clouds had parted at high noon. Archangel and Ian, Ringbearer and Ringwraith, stood side-by-side and watched as a wall of flame-Judiths – literally tens, hundreds of thousands of the flaming doppelgangers – rushed towards the spot where they stood. Ian kept his eyes straight ahead as he spoke. 'Are you sure this will work?'"


• Worldburner: Reach Out, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "'All sensors are working properly. Something is hiding that reality.' 'Hiding?' 'Yes, sir.' 'How in the hell do you hide a universe?'" (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Worldburner: They Were Nine, by Erin M. (parts 7 and 8): "Jane and Daria sat in O'Neill's former classroom. Neely was asleep in Daria's arms, sucking fitfully on a pacifier. Jane kept looking at her daughter, occasionally flicking her glance to the classroom door. 'I'm sure they're fine,' Daria said, trying to reassure her friend. 'I haven't heard any explosions or anything.' 'I know,' Jane said. 'That's what worries me. I really wish we hadn't lost the damn walkie-talkies last week.'" (Part 8)

Perfectly Normal, Innocent Penguins!

Today happens to be World Penguin Day, which is of course only relevant to fandom at all because the Penguins were the mascot of one of Lawndale High School's rival football teams.

Yeah. Just that. Nothing else.

(cough)

Anyway, while I'm here I may as well post the latest (NOT PENGUIN-RELATED, HONEST!) fandom news.

• Anyone else stressed out about finals? Commiserate with others in the thread.


• Deref has posted some lovely Autumn photos.


• Arena del Sur asks a question about Jake's graduation in Buxton Ridge.


• LadieT is looking for anime suggestions.


• What are your top 10 video games?


• For those who don't have the series on DVD, Daria comes to Hulu.


• Jim North tries something different with one of his fanfics: Fics on Tape.


• How do you overcome permanent writer's block? Lots of good advice in the thread.


• Lots of new Iron Chefs in the Creative Writing forum: Charles RB's Lawndale Fighters, Vukodlak's Daria's Trash freakout, Ms. Kinnikufan's Daria and Jane: Enemies at first sight, Temppeli's What's behind Alter Egos?, and Roentgen's The Name Game.


• Wassersauefer is looking for a picture of the entire cast of "Legion of Lawndale Heroes." Can you help?

Have an Eggs-celent Holiday! (Sorry.)

Happy Easter to everyone who celebrates it! The bunnies on the left aren't the kind usually associated with the holiday, but I don't think we'll hear Upchuck complaining any time soon.

If you're more interested in Easter eggs, then Joey might be able to help you out. I don't know about you, but I think I'll pass.

I have been informed by Charles RB that Daria has been featured in a Beavis and Butt-head Easter story comic. You can view a page from it here. Thanks, Charles RB!

If you'd like some Easter-related Daria fanfic and fanart, look no further than Thea Zara's Easter Egg Hunt collection! Be warned--there will be "awwww!"

Now go forth to hunt eggs and bite the heads off chocolate rabbits!

Happy Soda--I Mean, Earth Day!

Yes, today is Earth Day! Although the Earth shown on the left is not, technically, Earth-shaped, I am reliably informed by our sponsors that it is both refreshing and bubbly.

Now, everyone keep drinking while I update the latest fanfic!

• Barch vs DeMartino (Iron Chef: Lawndale Fighters), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'I understand you're cutting the club pictures out of the yearbook. You know who the faculty advisor to the Science Club is? The same person who sponsors the Take Back the Night Lawndale High School women's self-defence club!'"


• Daria, or the Confession of a Single Lonely Male, by Arena del Sur (part 2): "When I try to analyze my own cravings, motives, actions and so forth, I surrender to a sort of retrospective imagination which feeds the analytic faculty with boundless alternatives. I am convinced, however, that in a certain magic and fateful way Daria began with Cintia."


• God Save The Esteem ep27: Live Fast Die Old, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "On the way to class, Daria gave the volunteer sign-up sheets a look – they covered a wall, with a photo next to it of happy models of various ethnic groups and ages holding hands; 'Awareness of Others' had a smiley face for the O. O'Neill was really trying, which must mean something was going to go horribly wrong." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• God Save The Esteem ep 28: Punk Takes A Holiday, by Charles RB (part 1): "Daria paused and looked at the speaker: a short guy wearing a lurid green leprechaun costume (he even had the bowler hat), who had an Irish accent as spoken by an American who'd never been to Ireland. Beside him stood a laidback fat guy in a toga with a heart-adorned toy gun. Daria looked again at the speaker. He was still a short guy wearing a lurid green leprechaun costume, alongside a laidback fat guy in a toga with a heart-adorned toy gun."


• It's All About R-E-S-PE-CT (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Colonel Kyle Armalin looked out past the curtains at the audience, who had been chanting non-stop for ten minutes for the show to begin."


• I've Got To Be Direct, by ninetwelve (COMPLETE!): "The next day your mother slowly explains that its been six months. You've missed graduation. Your spot at Raft has been given to a student who can walk. Your tongue is dry and your mother places an ice cube at your lips. It tastes like sweet strawberry syrup. Slowly you begin to realize nothing will be the same."


• Jake and the Fat Man (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, kiddo! I was looking through some of my dad's papers this morning (lousy rotten old man)...and I found he had a storage locker here in town he had paid up for the next ten years. You'll never guess what I found inside!' Daria sighed; her father getting entangled with anything to do with his father never led to anything good. 'An unexploded nuclear bomb,' she joked. 'Hey, that's right!'"


• Learning to Trust (Iron Chef: Charter School), by Cap (COMPLETE!): "The world became a blur of color before turning white as pain shot through her when the floor raised up to smack her back and head, her breath leaving her in a violent whoosh. Vaguely, she heard her portfolios hitting the floor around her but all that registered was the hurt. Before Jane could reorient herself, Daria had a foot on her throat. Icy eyes stared down at her. 'But what you probably don't know is that I don't have to outrun anyone that I can out fight,' the shorter girl told her in a voice colder than an artic stone. "


• Mad Dog's Legacy Chapter 8: Adult Supervision, by Hyrin (part 1): "'That reminds me: Daria, since Quinn is still in the hospital, the Gupty's were wondering if you'd be interested in babysitting for them.' 'Not particularly.'"


• My Best Friend, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "He knelt down, so that he was almost at eye level with me. 'In a way, Daria, I'm glad this happened. You'll make sure that Janey gets the help she needs, and her life will get better and better.' He chuckled. 'Then, when I get out of prison in a few years, breaking her back in will be so much fun. And the things I'll do to you...'"


• Not So Different 4: Willy Nilly, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Jane nodded. 'So, has this experience killed your enthusiasm for the whole project?' 'My what?' 'Your enth—oh, sorry.' 'Forgiven.'"


• Not So Different 5: Unhealthy Business, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "'So much for principles', Sonny said. He spoke in a low voice, more than half to himself, but Jodie caught the words. 'I don't see any principles involved', she said before joining the coupon-collecting crowd. 'Youthful ideals. I come to bury them, not to praise them', said Sonny."


• Questions Asked Questions Answered & Pizza w/ Jane Ch 4, by Lord Yellowtail (part 1): "She looked at the empty seat next to her, thought of the art supplies and paintings she dusted every day, and Trent alone in a huge, empty house. She could blame Tom ten dozen different ways for how he'd unraveled their relationship. She could never blame him for wanting out of a boat that had been half-sunk from the very beginning. She had been content with their arrangement, but he'd wanted more than she ever had to give. It just wasn't fair."


• Remembrance, by HolyGrail2007 (part 10): "'Back in high school, Sandi would steamroll over her. Stacy couldn't even look a person in the eye without wimpering. She didn't get a spine until her junior year.' 'Hmm...I suppose this should be expected.' 'Huh?' Jeffy asked. 'Constantly nitpicked, beaten down? That sound about right? Probably silenced her with a glare, didn't she?' Kim asked. 'Wow, you're...you're totally right on. That's what she was like.'"


• Rude Awakening Episode 3: Drive, by (parts 5 - 9): "MACK: I'm about to reenact that famous moment in 1978 Gator Bowl. I'll be Woody Hayes and you be Clemson nose guard Charlie Bauman. KEVIN: Hey, I know this game! Isn't the game where Woody Hayes punched Bauman in the throat which led to the end of the Woody era at Ohio State. MACK: Yep. KEVIN: I don't like that re-enactment. MACK: But I love it." (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9)


• Searching For a New Hope, by thatLONERchick: "Daria heaved a sigh of relief and walked forward only a few paces before stopping dead at the sight which greeted her. Quinn was sequestered by the minister who had preformed the ceremony, sweaty comb over plastered to his scalp as he leaned over the obviously uncomfortable girl. Something snapped in Daria, and she moved forward with a serene smile on her face to intercede."


• Two Girls, a Guy and a Pizza Place, by TheExcellentS (part 4): "Suddenly, Jane got up and took both her and Daria's plates to the kitchen. As she came back, she threw a sticky, beige ball of dough at the back of Daria's head, knocking her glasses off. Daria put them back on and picked the dough out of her hair, before standing and turning to her assailant. 'What the hell, Jane?' 'It was too tense in here,' said Jane with a sheepish grin, 'So I'd thought I'd... you know... lighten things up with a doughy ambush.' Daria couldn't help but smile. 'Oh, it's on now.'"


• A Typical Morning at Jefferson (Iron Chef: "Ghetto" Daria), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Jane slipped her chain over her head as she waited for Daria to walk through the metal detectors, then the two of them moved toward their shared locker. Jane turned and gave someone the stank-eye for scuffing the toe of her boot, then shot them the bird when they gave her the eye right back." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)


• A Typical Night Away from Jefferson (Iron Chef: "Ghetto" Daria), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "'Here it comes,' Jane sighed, and waited for the bomb to drop. The strobe lights came up first. They started slow, but as the band trooped onstage and took up their respective instruments and positions, the lights picked up momentum. Chuck scratched out a beat just as the singer came up to his microphone and started the first song, a fan favorite."


• Unnamed story (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "'Hey! New kid!' The girl stiffened, then turned slowly. 'Can I help you?' 'Sorry I was such a bitch in Self-Esteem Class. It’s been one of those days, you know?' 'No, I don’t know.' And with that, the girl turned and kept walking."


• Unnamed story (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'He doesn't know what it means. He's got the speech memorized. Just enjoy the nice man's soothing voice.' Daria whipped around in her seat, eyes wild. 'Oh my God!' she yelled. 'We are enemies now!'"


• Unnamed story (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by ninetwelve (COMPLETE!): "Jane licked the back of her teeth, considering the girl. Plane and pudgy. Brown eyes and glasses. Dressed like a homeless veteran in a skirt. 'Wish you'd showed up a little earlier. Normally I have to make myself sick, could have used a good look at you about two minutes ago.'"


• Unnamed story (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'What's this about a speech impediment?' Li asked. 'She says po-tay-toe,' Daria said, snarling. 'And she says po-tah-toe,' Jane snarled back."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Bridal Expo Scenes), by the Quiet reader (COMPLETE!): "Spike and Bob took their seats as the bridal show started. 'Why are we here again?' Bob asked his friend. Shaggy behind them replies 'Ms. Li will make it mandatory if not enough people show up.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Fashion Centipede), by Raskolnikov (COMPLETE!): "'You know, I'm wondering how did she convince DeMartino to volunteer for the experiment.' 'Volunteer is such a harsh word. I prefer the word brutally coerced with the propect of an uneding agony topped with mutilation. What I really find impressing is how she managed to track down her ex-husband and kidnap, I mean, to bring him back and puttting him at the end of the line. I find that quite an achievement.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Fashion Centipede), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Jane, I found a portal to unlimited parallel dimensions behind the Chinese restaurant downtown.' Jane was thoughtful. 'What did you do with it?' 'I decided to start a parade...'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Fashion Centipede), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked from her father, down to Helen, Rita, and Amy, and back again."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: "Ghetto" Daria), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "The country club denizens stared at Daria, and she flipped the bird right back at them. 'Shit, the money's so old here it's got mould stanking the place up.' 'Nah, that's the pasta,' said Tom, before his face fell. 'Oh crap.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: "Ghetto" Daria), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Daria was stalking home at night, eyes snapping left and right for potential trouble, when she saw... wait, that can't be right. Nobody dressed like that in this hood. Not unless they wanted to get their ass kicked and their wallet scavved. On the other hand, looking at that car... well, okay, he'd get his ass kicked but nobody would bother with the wallet."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Lawndale Fighters), by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "'Quinn Morgendorffer!!' Said redhead whirled around as she heard her name yelled and looked at the young man several yards behind her. He was kind of cute, his cloth were stylish and he clearly was a buff, being tall, good looking and muscular. He pointed with his hand at her and took an aggressive stance, before he declared: 'I, Skylar Feldman, challenge you to a duel! If I win, you will go on a date with me!'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Jane eyed the new librarian as he nervously approached her. His demeanor reminded her a lot of Mr. O'Neill, except he was a lot older, and wore glasses and a tweed coat. 'Miss Jane Lane?' he asked hesitantly. Jane nodded in confirmation. 'My name is Rupert Giles, and I was hoping I could have a word with you.'" (Part 2


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Tom's Trashfreak out), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "As he turned to go back into the house, he saw a small white stick amongst the trash. He leaned down and, upon closer examination, saw that it was a pregnancy test. A used pregnancy test. Tom walked back to the house, muttering curses under his breath."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Tom's Trashfreak out), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "As she wondered who else in the house could be pregnant, Tom left the room. A moment later, she heard him speak from Quinn's room. 'Sandi, Stacy, Quinn, and Tiffany? We need to talk.' 'WHAT' Daria roared."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Tom's Trashfreak out), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Tom glared daggers at Daria. 'Daria, my loving girlfriend,' he said contemptuously. 'Do you care to explain how you became pregnant without the two of us having sex?' Daria opened her mouth, but a great booming voice said, 'I think I can answer that.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Tom's Trashfreak out), by tafka (COMPLETE!): "Tom climbed the stairs, planning on attacking the communal bathroom next. Hearing voices inside Quinn's room, he paused. '...and it turns out you can have a false-positive on those little stick thingies after all!' Quinn chirped into the phone. Tom sighed with relief. It was Quinn's test. No harm. No foul. But an interesting topic for conversation with Daria later."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'WHORE!' screamed Finn."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "The brunette walked around to the other side of the table, squatted down, and laid her chin on her forearms. 'Maybe you should see a doctor or something. We need everyone in the club to be in their best mental condition, or-' The first bullet went straight through Sandi's skull, into her brain, exploding out the other side even as she turned into mist and disappeared completely."


• Vomit, Lipstick and Accusations, by ninetwelve (COMPLETE!): "The toilette bowl was streaked with lipstick around the rim. A sickly wad of vomit dripped over the side. And a pile of clothes which stank of stale urine were bunched up at its side. Quinn's clothes."

Duuuuuude.

Today is 4/20, everyone! Trent may or may not celebrate this day every year, but judging by his expression in that image, his chronic (get it?) cough, and his relaxed attitude toward...everything, I'm going to say it's a strong possibility.

Today is also Volunteer Recognition Day, so let's take a moment to demonstrate our Awareness of Others. Half-assed clothing drives and reading "Howl" to seniors is optional.

Fandom News!

• What would it take to hold a Mega DariaCon? What issues are preventing it?


• Don-O has posted a travelogue of his trip to Laughlin, Nevada.


• Dervish wonders, why do you smoke?


• What are your top 10 movies you haven't seen but really think you should?


• Fans are discussing what martial art Daria would use. Assuming her deadly sarcasm failed her, of course.


• Charles RB posted a new Iron Chef: The Fashion Centipede.

Rrrrawr!

Today is the anniversary of the birth of Jayne Mansfield, born in 1933. Quinn is posing as the well-endowed movie star/Playboy centerfold on the left. If the canon Quinn looks anything like this alter ego under her baby-doll T-shirt, then it's no mystery whatsoever why the three Js were so devoted!

For those of you actually reading this and not staring in rapture at the picture, here's the latest fanfic:

• Daria/Dorian Ch. 14: Hair Dye On The Highway, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "The football team exams scores were in and for the first time in several years, none of the team would be starting the year on academic probation. Coach Smith and Ms. Li congratulated him on a job well done. Dorian walked out of the office with a Mona Lisa smile of satisfaction on his face. Good job, Dorian. Thanks.."


• Daria, or the Confession of a Single Lonely Male, by Arena del Sur (foreword and part 1): "Daria, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Da-ree-a: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Da. Ree. A. She was Da, plain Da, in the morning, standing five feet two in one combat boot. She was Dar in an orange skirt. She was D. at school. She was Daria Morgendorffer on the dotted line. But in my arms she was always Daria." (Part 1)


• A Devil Strikes (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by Grifter74 (COMPLETE!): "Trennt woke up lying on the stage of McGrundys with a surge of anger. He had gone to sleep in his room after putting Janey into her proper place, and the fear of him into her friend. Getting to his feet, Trennt yelled, 'Who ever did this better run. Because when I find you, I'm going to beat you black and blue.'"


• Die, Dude, Die (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "He flicked the butt out towards the lawn and turned to go back into the house when he noticed a shadow moving on the wall. It took him a moment to realize that it was his own shadow, and a moment longer to process that he shouldn't see his shadow at 1 AM. He turned slowly, and saw a ball of blue light hovering in the yard. He watched as it grew slowly, until it suddenly flared brightly and settled into a circular ball of light, surrounding a ring so black it hurt to look at it."


• The Girl In Question, by Silver: "She picked up the file again. There wasn't a lot; most of the pages could have simply been dipped in black ink for all the spots blacked out. From what there was, she'd learned a bit about Project Origin. 'Psychic supersoliders? Right. Not real.'"


• God Save The Esteem ep 26: Quaran-Tommed, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'So, Tom...' 'So, Tristan.' 'How easy is that girl?' Then: 'OW!' 'Sorry, my foot slipped.' 'You crossed the room!' 'It was a big slip.'" (Part 4)


• LLH Alternate Future - 08 - Get Real, by psychotol (parts 6 and 7): "'Good idea, I'll be able to charge you with assaulting a superior enlisted, and you'll be dishonourably out.' Tiffany stopped, knowing he was right. She wasn't planning to merely slug him. She was planning to kill him. That would Get her at least life in the Well." (Part 7)


• My Best Friend, by Smijey: "'I've...I've been trying, Daria, God knows I have. I took you camping, and I do the same damned thing the Old Man did. I wouldn't blame you if you hated me.' 'I...I don't hate you, dad. I...l-love you.' I stumbled over the word, but I managed to say it. He started to cry again. 'You deserve better!' he quietly moaned. 'You deserve better!' I thought of Jane. 'Dad, I could do a lot worse than you. I'm...I'm glad I have you.'" (New part) (Newer part)


• Not So Different 1: A Friend In Hell Is A Friend Indeed, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "'I thought I could see whatever I wanted in the picture', Sonny lied. 'That's a different test, Sonny. In this one I want you to tell a story, like I said.' 'Oh, I see. So this isn't like a version of the Rorschach test. It's more like a version of the Thematic Apperception Test. Okay, it's a picture of a boy and a girl talking—about a knight in shining armour rescuing a beautiful princess from a dragon.'"


• Not So Different 2: Candour, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Sonny scratched behind his ear. I'm not going to talk her out of this idea. So what do I want? Run the risk of being beaten up for nosing around his girlfriend, or run the risk of being beaten up for refusing to help his girlfriend? Given that there's nothing at stake here that matters to me ... He cleared his throat. 'I tell you what, Brittany. I'll help you on two conditions. One, you say nothing of any kind to Kevin about me. Two, this is the only time ever.'"


• Not So Different 3: Future So Dark, Got To Wear Shades, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "'Can I bask in your reflected glory?' Jane continued. 'Only if it doesn't bother you that the glory is actually reflected from Quinn. She was the one who let the frat boys choose her as their Keg Queen without mentioning that she was under-age. But she's happy for the credit for our expulsion to go to me.' 'Is there no end to that girl's selflessness? Maybe you should tell me the whole story.'"


• One Dead Lane Deserves Another, by Ixmythot (COMPLETE!): "Daria frowned, This was not the Trent she, or rather her original self had known. His face was all wrong, marred with the creases and lines of one who did nothing but torment and abuse everyone in their path, regardless of who they were. Her frown increased even further as her gaze ran down his body. Muscles where they were not before, the body of one who did not use the strength they were given to protect, or save, but to instead inflict harm upon. Even she, with her undying hatred of Ironheade and all they stood for, despised such 'people'."


• Promises, by LadieT (part 16): "'I want to fall apart, but I know I can't. Amy and Dr. Phillips told me about, about ...' Quinn fought to keep the tears from falling. Quinn looked up at the group, 'Does this mean we're a family again? Because I really need all of you right now.'"


• Remembrance, by HolyGrail2007 (part 8): "Tall, dark, and handsome, the way she liked them, with a glimmer of intelligence in his green eyes, even more her style. His obviously customized and well-tailored black suit was icing on the cake. While he a full head of brown hair, his temples were starting to gray already. He couldn't have been much older than Kim herself, in his early 30's, but he looked older. That wasn't necessarily bad for men, but the years must not have been kind to him. 'Hello, Mr. Sloane.' Jeffy nodded respectfully."


• Rude Awakening Episode 3: Drive, by DIsaac (parts 3 and 4): "SANDI: Wow! I am so glad to have friends that are a bunch of brains because they get the money. DARIA: Tru dat, sister! You've got enough brains to hang with us as well. Welcome to the club. SANDI: It's good to be in it." (Part 4)


• Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "At first, she thought they were produced and directed by a naggingly familiar nemesis fond of his stagecraft and intoxicated with the sense of his own personal genius. For someone like that, Upchuck would be a suitable tin toy vehicle. But, no, the weighty sensation of Orson Welles' presence was not there. To deal with this would require both high order thought and extra cheese pizza."


• Screams of Silence (now on SFMB), by Jim North: "I come to in a small room dimly lit by the fluorescent bulbs overhead. Next to me are a rolling tray and a plastic and metal chair, like from a cheap hospital waiting room. I'm on a cot and my left wrist is handcuffed to a handicap bar running along the wall. I'm somewhat concerned."


• Selling Virgins, by ninetwelve (COMPLETE!): "It doesn't happen like that. There was no box. There was nothing left to put in a box. Just a well dressed man presenting someone's kid sister with a trifolded flag. And then the tears. I gave up then. Became a cog. A worker bee. I got a regular job. Retail. Selling pornography. I was the kinda indie, kinda quirky, porn-store chick with enough in the way of tits to get leered at and enough in the way of wits to get a reputation."


• The Seventh (Squared) Circle of Hell (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by TheExcellentS (COMPLETE!): "DeMartino: 'The following.. ha ha... CONTEST is a 67-on-1 HANDICAP MATCH scheduled for ONE fall. Introducing FIRST, already in the ring... actually... this quote MAN end quote doesn't DESERVE an introduction!'"


• Something Like Regret, by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "'Promise me that this isn't the end.' She gripped her love's hand with desperate strength, and Daria squeezed back just as hard. 'Promise me we'll meet again, in the next life, and we'll be together.' She swallowed, and her dry throat clicked. 'Forever, this time.' Daria kissed Jane's hand, then her cheek, and finally her lips. 'I promise, Jane. I'll find you again, if you don't find me first.'"


• Study Lesson (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by ash_blackfire (COMPLETE!): "Trennt woke up on the table in the kitchen. As he tried to sit up he couldn't. His head spun as he was his vision was starting to return. He had felt this before when he tested the rufies on himself. He wanted see how long it would work and to see if he could get high off of it. He felt his hands and feet tied to the table at the joints and his torso. He felt a sharp pull at his hair as he tried to move his head in vain."


• Transmission (LLH Mini), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'I still don't get it,' Nathan said. 'I mean, being a Soviet Terminator from another universe, I get that. But the magic ninjas? The talking dog? Man, I just read the lines I'm paid to read but I'm getting the feeling that there's a big backstory. Is there some kind of prequel?'"


• Tridecadal, by RLobinske (parts 3 and 4): "'Maoraor!' Bump greeted Daria at the front door. She placed her satchel on the floor and squatted to pet the cat. 'Your dedicated servant is home after earning adequate funds to properly supply you with your daily sustenance.'" (Part 4)


• Two Girls, a Guy and a Pizza Place, by TheExcellentS (part 3): "For the next half an hour or so, Daria and Jane read through the book, getting all the basic recipes memorised in their brains. 'Well what do you know," Daria said to Jane with a grin as she turned to the sauces page, "The secret ingredient in the Marinara sauce actually was a quart of grease.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by GingerLove84 (COMPLETE!): "Kevin stood on the sidewalk unsure. He really wanted to see Jane, but he didn't want to see her brother. What if he was still mad like Jane? He looked pretty buff for a skinny dude, and could probably kick Kevin's butt to Oakwood and back. Sighing, Kevin started to turn away.... Until he heard a sound..."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: TAKE OUT TRENT LANE!), by Lord Yellowtail (COMPLETE!): "He was abruptly distracted by a can rolling up to his feet, nearly tripping him. He growled. 'Damn junk.' Even in the dim light of the night street lamps, he saw a slip of mustard yellow in the can, and, struck by a sudden curiosity, bent down and picked it up carefully between two fingers. His eyes narrowed in confusion; it was a blank, yellow business card."


• Unnamed story (IRON CHEF: Trennt Lane Part 2: The Redemption), by ash_blackfire (COMPLETE!): "Trennt flopped on to the couch after his band practice still high off of LSD. He started flipping thru the channels and saw nothing that caught his eye. He started the DVD that was in the player as the machine came to life and began watching."


• Unnamed story (IRON CHEF: Trennt Lane Part 2: The Redemption), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "'Trennt, what the **** is wrong with you?' He roared and crossed the room, arm raised to strike her, but he froze at the last second. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror: hand raised to hit a girl, face contorted in rage. His eyes locked on the eyes of his reflection, and he heard a distant echo of his conversation with Jesse from last night."


• Unnamed story (Long Story Challenge 3, Round 1), by Shull Bitter: "That was all it took. He had a friend, and it was a girl. He didn't hit on her though. After all, she was clearly a geek girl—any girl on the internet could be assumed to be quite a geek, and that usually included bad hair, skin, and body image issues. While he still thought brains were hot—hello, look at his defense of Scully for her brain, and not curvaceous bod—he knew that sometimes delicate flowers needed gentle prodding to blossom, and forcing them open could lead to them shriveling and dying."


• Worldburner: Amelia is Utterly Screwed, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Calm down, she told herself. I have to reach New Sierra at some point. It will all be okay. Nothing's going to happen... ---- 'LET THE WORD GO THROUGH THE MULTIVERSE!' Judith declared. 'AMELIA MUST DIE!!'"


• Worldburner: They Were Nine, by Erin M. (part 6): "He pulled the hood away from his head, causing Angela to suck in a breath sharply as the familiar features of Timothy O'Neill came into view. He grinned at her, not unkindly, which somehow made the experience all the more terrifying. 'I know it's hard to accept that your entire existence is a a sick twisted perversion of how things are supposed to be, but it is the truth. And deviation must not be allowed to exist. So, I'm sorry, Angela, but I promise I'll make it--'"

Guess His Name is "Hammie" Now!

Fifty years ago today, the Bay of Pigs invasion was launched against Cuba. It was a failure for the CIA, and it doesn't seem to have worked out too well for Jamie, either. I knew he should have remembered to bring Quinn the square crackers instead of the round ones.

Fandom News!

• RLobinske requests that PPMB members review and delete unneeded attachments in order to free up space.


• Kael Seoras has posted some useful information about internet scams.


• What is your superpower? Inspired by...


• ...What superpowers would each Daria character get? Also includes discussion of existing Daria/superpower fanfics.


• Some (possibly) good news about a Region 2 Daria DVD release.


• Erin M. is looking for opinions on a new endeavor.


• Upchuck (or rather Geoffrey Arend) appeared on Top Chef Masters recently.


• What are your top 10 favorite movies?


• The Worldburner project will close on May 1! Be ready!


• Lots of new Iron Chefs in the Creative Writing forum: DIsaac's TAKE OUT TRENT LANE! and Trennt Lane Part 2: The Redemption, as well as Vukodlak's Tom's Trashfreak out and "Ghetto" Daria.

Happy Birthday, You Lovable Tramp!

Sir Charles Spencer Chaplin, better known as Charlie Chaplin, was born on this day in 1889! O'Neill is trying his best on the left, but Chaplin was way funnier. Intentionally, anyway.

Today is also Emancipation Day for Washington, D.C., commemorating the day in 1862 when Abraham Lincoln signed the Compensated Emancipation Act. Signed nine months before the more famous Emancipation Proclamation, it freed 3,100 slaves in the District of Columbia. Not a bad day's work!

Little else to note for today. Anyone else have anything they feel like sharing? Knock yourself out in the comments.

"Don't just stand there, handsome. Hold onto my waist."

On this day in 1912, the Titanic struck that infamous iceberg. It would sink early the following day. On the right, Mr. O'Neill and DeeDee recreate the well-known scene from the movie, shortly before DeeDee hits the water courtesy of Ms. Barch. I notice O'Neill's left hand is creeping into dangerous territory, but DeeDee doesn't appear to mind.

Also on this day, Abraham Lincoln was assassinated in 1865. Try not to talk about it too much around Brittany, though, until Jodie has a chance to break it to her gently:

Jodie: Come on, Brittany. Let's finish our fitting, and I'll tell you all about how nice Mr. Lincoln really died.

Brittany: You mean the bullet didn't kill him?

New Fanfic!

• Alternate Universe: What the fuck? 2 (AUs, Brain Farts and other stuff), by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "'We're not here to win, we're just here to have a good time and show the audience our great talent.' Everyone looked at Ted, who smiled at them with nearly sparkling teeth and shining optimism. But it could also be the weed, no one really knows. 'Ted', grumbled Joey, shoving a long hairstreak out of his face. 'Yes?' 'Stop sounding like a hippie, okay?' 'Okay.'"


• Behind the Iron Curtain, by Temppeli (part 4): "'There is only one place nearby that needs more workforce than it has inhabitants. The heart of our nation: Moscow,' answered Darya. 'That was an excellent answer, Darya. It's a great representation of the natural behavior of traffic. And actually, it's a place which is commutable on school days, and would make for an excellent field trip. We're going to Moscow next Friday...'"


• Esteemster Series, by TheExcellentS (part 3): "O'Neill: 'Cindy Brolsma showing no shortage of self-confidence as she heads for her first major PPV bout, Janet.' Barch: 'That's all well and good, but she may be tempting fate by taking this match tonight. Sandi Griffin is hard enough to fight when she's in a good mood, let alone in a bad one.'"


• Fugitive Chapter 8: Grunge, by Wassersauefer (COMPLETE!): "Instead of answering did “Captain Jim Brass” just smile, before he was engulfed in a blueish energy and his appearance was another from one minute to the next. His green lenses glowed in the darkness and his body seemed to be one with the darkness around him. A whole minute the two just sat there and stared at each other, before he began talking. His voice was harsh, sore and throaty, like he hasn't used it for a very long time. 'Alexey Borisowitsch Ulanow.' 'Small Joe.' The two glared at each other. Then, they exploded into movement."


• The Girl In Question, by Silver (part 6): "The only tree for what seemed like miles. The world was vast to a girl her age. On the tree was the only swing for what seemed like miles, as well. She used it often, to get away from the arguments of her parents. It was just such an incident when her father approached her."


• The James Lane Chronicles Chapter 6, by InvisibleDan (part 2): "James went up the stairs and saw Daria's door was still open. He knocked before he went in anyway. Not hearing an answer, he tiptoed in and saw Daria lying in bed, her arm over the side. The book she was reading earlier was on the floor. 'Hey, what's wrong?' he said. She looked up at him and stared blankly. 'Nothing.' 'Yeah, right. You wouldn't leave a slice of pizza unfinished unless you had an intestinal parasite gnawing at your guts or something.'"


• Just Remain Calm, by ash_blackfire (part 1): "Helen thought that something that would help her. Something to get her mind to focus and expand at the same time. She put her into a martial arts class. What Helen and Jake both found out was a surprise. With in the first 6 months of class she was able to make it to black belt!"


• Life After Highland Ch. 1: Rush This!, by LadieT (part 1): "'Quinn and I fought all the time growing up, until dad had his heart attack. It scared both of us and we started to lean on each other for support. Then, when he passed away, I fell apart. I almost dropped out of college. I even refused to see Amelia or Steven. Quinn had to pull me up off the floor, literally, dust me off and get me to care about anything again. So, I owe her at least the party attendances.'"


• LLH Alternate Future - 08 - Get Real, by psychotol (part 5): "'Everyone, we need to get this Daria back in time with minimum conversation,' said Jodie. 'Why?' asked Brittany. 'Because careless talk around time travellers costs timeline integrity,' said Daria. 'Huh?' asked Brittany. 'It’s a perfectly good way to get stuck in a causality loop my friend,' said Daria. 'Huh?' 'L- ... Never mind, just get me back to when I came.'"


• My Best Friend, by Smijey: "On the fourth day, as I walked home from school, the Tank pulled up next to me and I almost lost control of my bladder as Trent leaned out the window. 'Hey, Daria,' he said, a shark's grin on his face. 'Janey and I are heading up to Swedesville for Alternapalooza, and she's just dying to have you come.' He roared with laughter at his attempt at witty banter."


• Oak Heaven (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Tiffany walked down the hall, a confused look on her face. She had heard something unusual in the bathroom, and didn't know what to make of it. She soon noticed Quinn talking to a boy, and smiled, because Quinn might know what it was she had heard. 'Hey, Quinn,' she said in her usual drawl. 'Do you know what Oak Heaven is?'"


• Promises, by LadieT (part 15): "Jake and Helen looked over at Daria and Jane and asked if they wanted to go together. Daria and Jane agreed. Daria knelt down in front of her niece. 'Are you sure you want to do this Cleo?' The five-year-old looked at her aunt with sad eyes. 'I want to say goodbye to my daddy.'"


• Red Leaves (You Finish the Story), by ninetwelve (part 1): "It was only Daria who noticed the way in which the house seemed to bend physics. Bend perception. But for the first year she didn't let herself think it. In an oblique, peripheral way she was aware it was all wrong. Terribly wrong. But she never said anything, never even let herself think about it. In her mind it was like the fear of cancer with each drag with a cigarette."


• Remembrance, by HolyGrail2007 (part 7): "After a very light sleep, Kim was ready to head back to work. She knew this would take a lot of work, and it excited her. This was more than just a simple murder: If it was simple evidence that needed to be looked at, the Sheriff Maverick could handle that herself. It was this unknown subject that warranted her attention, and where she needed to focus her attention."


• Rude Awakening Episode 3: Drive, by DIsaac (parts 1 and 2): "JANE: You know, amiga, this was your idea of hell back in high school; you and two of the former 'Fashion Club' elites in the same place at the same time and you can't escape them either. DARIA: And it’s still my idea of hell, but I went and said to myself, if I'm going to hell for some of the things I've done on this show - I might as well do a down payment now." (Part 2)


• Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "'The last straw? Well, what did it for me was when my daughter came over to me and asked if she could go to a raw meat cannibal sleepover on the weekend. I told her we don't eat strange uncooked people, no matter how good they look as sushi. I mean, you don't know where they've been, or what they've been into. And then, there's her boyfriend. Don't get me started on him. Or on his crazy aunt who wanted to adopt and blew her inheritance on a Justin Bieber clone...' Click."


• Screams of Silence, by Jim North: "I re-read the poem twice more, though calling it that is rather generous on my part. Rhyming 'breath' with 'wealth'? Changing tenses in the fourth verse? Who does that? And for another thing . . . I don't like it. I just don't like it at all. There's something about it that's making my skin crawl, and it's not just professional offense or general creepiness. It's almost as if . . ." (New part)


• Something Like Regret, by thatLONERchick: "'I didn't just come to bring you your cake, kiddo.' He glanced at Jane. 'Or meet the friend your nurse told me about. I wanted to ask you if you'd consider...' He cleared his throat, fighting sudden emotion. 'Well, if you'd like to come home.' Daria stared at him, all astonishment, and Jane dropped her head. Her eyes found the slice of birthday cake Jake had so thoughtfully brought for her, and Jane flicked out a long finger, collected a blob of whipped cream and brought it to her mouth. She licked it away, slowly, barely tasting it, and waited for Daria to say she would be leaving." (New part)


• Two Girls, a Guy and a Pizza Place, by TheExcellentS (part 2): "'It's nothing,' said Daria as she shifted awkwardly, 'I think Jodie Landon already owns a resort in Las Vegas.' 'I heard about that place on the news,' said Jane, 'Isn't that where the white tigers force the humans to do tricks for a paying audience?' 'You sure that was the news you were watching?'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria Inspired by Different Movies), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Open the door!' Daria begged. 'Please-! Open it!' 'No - he'll get in!' Sandi said, her eyes going wide. 'You're a brain - you can find someplace else!' Tiffany's eyes actually went wide as she looked to the other side of the street. 'Here... he... comes...!' A hiss that seemed to fill the night erupted from far behind Daria; she grimaced at the fleshy smack of an officer's severed torso hit the pavement - and went pale as the creature fixed its eyes upon her."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria leaves the Show), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane were walking to school, as was their wont. 'Did you study for your math test?' Jane asked, hoping to bum some notes off her amiga. 'I have to go now,' Daria replied, in a fake voice. 'My planet needs me.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'I couldn’t have gained such a powerful image of myself without all of those who helped me. Most important, I’d like to thank my little brother, Finn Morgandorffer, who told me that I am great just the way I am. Where are you, little bro? Stand up and let everyone see who the real inspiration is!'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "I lean back against the wall, slide down to the floor, and bury my face in my hands as I begin to cry."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "I suddenly run up against a brick wall. Quite literally, a brick wall stopping any progress beyond the fifth step. I slam against it with my shoulder in frustration, then jump back down and swing around to go down instead. I can hear scratching and scrabbling just outside the door now, but apparently the demon squirrels don't know how to properly use a doorknob."


• Whatever It Is, by GingerLove84 (COMPLETE!): "JANE: If you wanna make a friend, try Jake. QUINN: Only if you like stories about Mad Dog and Ellenbogen... JANE (shrugging): As long as you can play 'What’s that over there?' you’re fine."