Saturday, November 30, 2013

It's a Good Day for Satirists!


Daria is reenacting Gulliver's introduction to the Lilliputians from Gulliver Travels, a work by Jonathan Swift, who was born on this day in 1667. Swift had a skill with satire that rivals even that of Our Heroine--a skill he shares with another writer who shares his birthday, Mark Twain, born in 1835. We already know Daria's a Twain fan, as we saw he was featured on her nightshirt in "Lane Miserables."

Fandom News!
  • Share any Black Friday shopping horror stories you've witnessed or heard about.

  • SacredDust is accepting requests for his burger reviews.

  • Happy Hanukkah to those in fandom that celebrate it!

  • It's not paranoia if they're really out to get you! Talk about conspiracy theories in a new thread.

  • Discuss the latest developments on Family Guy and look out for spoilers!

  • Talk about the new movie Frozen in the Weapons of Mass Distraction forum.

  • Erin M. is asking artists if anyone could design a logo for him.

Thursday, November 28, 2013

That's One Way to Stop Quinn from Shopping


Happy Thanksgiving to all of the posters in the U. S.! Whether you're stuffing your face, watching football, or alone with a TV dinner, I hope the holiday is enjoyable and free of screwed-up family problems that leave you depressed by the end of the day.

If you need a break from the food and family, how about some Thanksgiving-themed fanfic?

And if that isn't enough fanfic for you, about about today's...

Fanfic Update!
  • The Dale of Lawn Book 2, by Wassersauefer (part 2): "'You are the lady in waiting for my bride, you pretty little thing you, aren't you?' It was not a question, not really, and instead of answering she blushed and tried to keep her head down, though she felt the urge to push a dagger into his heart. Or his neck. Or his lungs. Or just his eyes."

  • Different Tracks, by ognawk (part 1): "'Well, you're sort of a sports star now. It's not so cool to be hanging around with... you know, losers.' Jane thought about it for a moment. She had been a lot more popular with people lately, and much to her surprise, she didn't hate it. In fact, she kind of liked it."

  • Fear and Loathing in Law Enforcement, by LongSnakeMoan (part 1): "Flashing green eyes stared up from under a fringe of pink red hair, her mouth twisted in contempt. Oh, he was going to have fun with this one."

  • Jane's Rack (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, Daria,' Jane said to her friend, who was lazily reclining on her living room couch. 'Quick question.' 'Five, four, three-' 'Wanna see my rack?'"

  • The Man Next Door, by SacredDust (part 3): "Amanda once heard that there were two kinds of people: those who were taught that the world was a safe place, and those who were taught that the world was a scary place. She was the first kind."

  • Paying Respects (My Annual Thanksgiving Fanfic Release - 2013!), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'I only met him a couple of times. His people… I butted heads with them a few times, during my days when I was working out of Lackland. I tried my hardest to stay the hell out of Texas when I could. People like J.R. Ewing get uncomfortable when people like me show up unexpectedly, or decide to move into the neighborhood.'"

  • The Punk and the Snark, by Shiva (part 14): "'We're stranded in a cabin in the middle of nowhere with our classmates, the only teacher still here has wrapped herself up in a stolen sleeping bag and is still turning blue, the other ones walked out into the middle of an ice storm to get help.'"

  • Rude Awakening: The Holidays in NE are just as crazy!, by DIsaac (part 1): "STACY: (sounding suspicious) What do you mean you are not hosting the family for Christmas? SUSIE: Well, Mom and Dad want to break tradition and they want to hold it at your house for some weird reason this year."

  • Sisters Are Doing It For Themselves (My Annual Thanksgiving Fanfic Release - 2013!), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Chloe took a long glance at the tall redhead. 'Continuing. So, we're all watching this sex-ed film, and-' She stopped talking as she noticed how Jodie, Sandi and Stacy suddenly seemed to lose their appetites – and the other Legionnaires actually slowed their assault on the dinner table for a few moments."

  • Sleep to Dream Him (Shorty Shorts), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "It was Saturday morning, and Jane was sat alone in one of Lawndale's local coffee shops. It was busy in there, and she was thankful to get somewhere to sit as she read the Arts section of the Lawndale Herald and sipped on her coffee. A man approached the table, but Jane focussed on her paper."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'Yeah, but what I'm trying to say is, like, we've got all these memories and hopes and dreams and everything, and they're all made up of these chemicals and bioelectric thingamajiggies in our brains, right? Primal instincts and maybe even conscious thought melding together into human personality? Something like that.'"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Hey Mom?' Daria spoke up while tugging on her mother's pant leg. 'Yes, dear?' Helen replied, turning off her holoband and glancing down at her three year old daughter."

  • X-Mas (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Sandi, for some inexplicable reason, was holding an orange. A demon whispered in Jane's ear, and she smiled."

  • The Zapper (My Annual Thanksgiving Fanfic Release - 2013!), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Not realistic - but we learned how to do something similar. Have you ever heard of a "railgun?' 'Of course. One of the better weapons in movies, but they don't work in real life.' 'Uh-huh.' 'Paula...?'"

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

The Cake Better Not Be a Lie!


Quinn has baked us a lovely chocolate layer cake in honor of National Cake Day, but I'm sure she has an ulterior motive. Perhaps she needs a ride to the mall, because today is also Shopping Reminder Day. Not that Quinn ever needs any reminding.

Fandom News!

Sunday, November 24, 2013

"Darwin's the monkey guy, right? I like monkeys!"


Joey, Jeffy, and Jamie are monkeying around on Evolution Day, the anniversary of the publication of On the Origin of Species by Charles Darwin in 1859. It's just a pity that the three Js will never evolve past the invertebrate stage; when Quinn is around, they'll always be spineless.

Fanfic Update!
  • Death Comes to Another Lawndale, by ognawk (part 9): "Elaine Swinton grumbled as she adjusted the apron that was part of her Payday uniform. She never expected to come down to this level."

  • The Great and the Good: A Great Deal of Trouble, by ognawk (part 1): "Alison turned to see the source of the voice, a petite high school age looking girl with short red hair and glasses, wearing a long yellow dress."

  • Her Friend, by macross (parts 1 and 2): "The sounds of preschoolers laughing and running amok grated on the nerves of the woman with Dark Auburn hair as she tried to enjoy the mimosa her sister had prepared for the adult guests at the birthday party. She had to admit to herself that the drinks were a lifesaver when it came to dealing with a bunch of screaming four-year-olds." (Part 2)

  • I Didn't See That One Coming... (LLH Mini), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'This bitch is such a phony.' Lance thought to himself as Celeste made some light conversation with Elise, letting everyone in the audience see how much empathy she had for the woman."

  • It's A Small World After All, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Alison opened one eye and saw the motel room was empty. She heard movement coming from the bathroom, though, so she knew Jane was still present."

  • I Wanna Make It With You (LongSnakeMoan's Fluff Thread), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "From the moment he looked at her he couldn't take his eyes off her and as soon as they'd started talking he was mesmerised. All thoughts of getting her into bed and then out his life seemed to have melted away and the only thing he'd wanted to do was to be with her for as long as possible."

  • The Lost Woman, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Val scrutinized Daria for a long moment, before she gave the young cynic a sad smile. 'Oh Dar...Daria,' she corrected. 'You remind me so much of myself at your age.'"

  • The Man Next Door, by SacredDust (parts 1 and 2): "Amanda Lane stood back with her arms crossed and glowered at her latest painting, as though she could frighten it into coming out like she wanted." (Part 2)

  • Out of Place, by PrecambrianStudios (parts 3 and 4): "Scissors MacGillicutty opened the door. Two smelly teens stood in front of him, each one smelling like alcohol and covered what looked like vomit. 'So. How was the Zon?' he smirked." (Part 4)

  • The Poem, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Timothy O'Neill sighed and planted his elbows on the desk, spaced out enough to avoid hitting his keyboard (again), he put his head in his hands and moaned."

  • Retro is Dead (Shorty Shorts), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "It was a cool evening in Lawndale, and Nathan had decided to head out for a stroll."

  • Unnamed story (IC: Daria is Tesla reborn), by ashk09 (COMPLETE!): "She couldn't remember how it had all started, Daria thought as she began assembling a hodge-podge of components – some pilfered from scrapheaps, some bought with her Montana Cabin Fund – but one night, as if something had possessed her momentarily, she'd found herself wandering through the house in a state of disembodied reverie."

Friday, November 22, 2013

"Now, cashews, those are what the big guys eat...the CEOs!"


Jake is searching through his bag of airplane nuts because he knows that today is National Cashew Day, and life is too short to settle for peanuts. Just watch out for those salted goldfish.

Also, fifteen years ago today, paperpusher posted his fanfic "Her, Uh, Cane" on FanFiction.net, and that happens to be the oldest Daria fanfic posted to that site. A red-letter day for fandom!

Fandom News!

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

D'awwwwww!


Quinn is doing her most adorable dance for us because today is Universal Children's Day. I'm sure Daria wants nothing to do with any of it, considering her stance of "I didn't even like kids when I was a kid."

Fanfic Update!
  • Commune Family, by Shiva (part 3): "Quinn finished her early morning yoga session on the mat she had set up in the center of her new bedroom, she wasn't finished decorating it yet but she already had her posters of Sublime and Pink Floyd up along with the big tapestry of Krishna and her lucky Buddha was in pride of place next to her bed."

  • Darius Taylor, by Shiva (part 17): "The humidity of Washington DC made the summer heat even worse, however as Darius lounged in a deck chair, digging the sunshine since he was only wearing a pair of board shorts, it was clear that it wasn't bothering him all that much."

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 33a): "There was a new announcer and she looked pretty good to Kris. She was also saying something about some kind of bad weather on the way, but Kris's father turned the report off, saying how good the weather was looking."

  • Geeky Boy and Shallow Girl and Five and Counting (LongSnakeMoan's Fluff Thread), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "'Do you remember when we first met?'"

  • The Great and the Good: The Winters Tales, by ognawk (parts 2 and 3): " You can talk to her just fine, but why can't you take that big step? Then the doubts crept in. She's pretty, she's smart and she's popular. She could have any guy in school she wants. Why would she be interested in you? She'd laugh in your face." (Part 3)

  • Groped by an Angel Food Cake (Pie, Pie, My Darling), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "What had happened was...monumental. It changed the lives of everybody who witnessed it, and from then on the day was as burned into their memory as was the Kennedy assassination for their parents, or the Pearl Harbor bombing for their grandparents."

  • The Joke's On Them (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by SacredDust (COMPLETE!): "'Now,' Doc said softly as he unwrapped the bandages from her face. 'Let's see how we did.'"

  • A New Direction, by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "Daria was contemplating making a run for it when a boy about her own age with dark hair and green eyes wearing an usher's badge on a lanyard came over. 'Excuse me. Ms. Morgendorffer? Your father asked me to see if I could find you, would you come out to the bar please?'"

  • The Story of Rocket Lane (Iron Chef - Jane plays Football), by DIsaac (parts 1 - 5): "Folks, I'm about to tell you the tale of how Lawndale High won their first back to back state title in the history of the school." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)

  • Victor Morgendorffer, by Shiva (part 23): "'Enter.' Victor called out a bit miffed at the interruption. However he brightened slightly when Daria stepped in, shutting the door behind her."

  • Watching a Sunset (Getting to Casa Lane), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "It was difficult under the best of times to be a kid wandering around without any seeming adult supervision, and the more kids involved the more likely it was to be noticed."

  • When the Bough Breaks, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "The two of them ate breakfast together, and Jodie heard Zion begin crying through the monitor just as Mack was heading out the door. He gave her a worried look, but she waved him away. 'I've got it,' she said with far more confidence than she actually felt."

Monday, November 18, 2013

Of Course, the Real Mystery is What She Saw in Upchuck


Andrea invites everyone to join her in observing Occult Day, in which we explore the dark mysteries of life. Also, the mystery of which aisle the shoe laces are in. Stacy, meanwhile, has had more than enough experience with the occult after her brush with curses and potions. Still, I wouldn't accept any soda offers from her if I were you.

Fandom News!

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Do You Want Fries With...Oh. Right.


Daria and Jane are just grabbing a quick meal in honor of National Fast Food Day. They were going to stop at the Beef N' Cake, but apparently they're still having refrigeration problems. For a hilarious view of the Fashion Club's experiences with fast food, see S-C's brilliant fan art "Burger World."

Fanfic Update!
  • 50 Shades Of Germs (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Wait a minute. 'Mr Grey, I may regret this, but how many different people have you...'"

  • Commune Family, by Shiva (parts 1 and 2): "It had been surprisingly painful to see the old commune in the rearview mirror for the last time, but Daria figured that was because it had been her home her entire life." (Part 2)

  • The Dale of Lawn Book 2, by Wassersauefer (prologue and part 1): "Princess Sandi Griffon was steaming with rage. Not that any one could see it, as her features were perfectly calm and schooled into giving away nothing." (Part 1)

  • Daria Goes GOP, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Andrew Landon looked at himself in the mirror, feeling ridiculous. 'Are you sure this will get your friend Daria to register as a Republican, Jodie?'"

  • The Depths of Cedars, by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "'Room 213.' Daria was suddenly concerned. That's where Jodie is, she thought. Tom spun round, having heard Daria's thoughts. 'Who's Jodie?'" (Part 4)

  • DW: Escape from Trenzalore, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "The Doctor ran, as fast as he could while holding the Impossible Girl in his arms. He didn't look back..."

  • The Façade (Iron Chef: Oh, No! O'Neill!), by ashk09 (COMPLETE!): "Checking himself out in the mirror, O'Neill arranged his features until he found an expression that conveyed pretty much the opposite of what he was actually feeling in his gut; a pleasant, open demeanour might not get you everything you wanted in life, but damn, it brought you close."

  • The Great and the Good: The Winters Tales, by ognawk (part 1): "'Hi Ashley!' As he turned around, he came face to face with one of the prettiest sights he'd ever seen, Leanne Stevens."

  • Loss of Heart, by RLobinske (part 4): "Watching Helen and Amy join the others in the living room, Daria said to Quinn, 'It's probably a good thing that none of Dad's clients showed up. With this much family in place, we don't need any more volatility.'"

  • Out With the Old (The All New All-Purpose Creative Writing Thread), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "As she made her way to the lockers, she saw who she was looking for. That weird art chick in the year above her, Jane. She walked up to Jane as she was putting her books back in her locker."

  • No Strings Attached (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by SacredDust (COMPLETE!): "Tom Sloane wrinkled his nose as he walked through the doors. He hated coming here, but he felt obligated to visit Cassidy once in a while. Despite her mental disintegration--and the obsessive, borderline sociopathic personality that came out in the whole mess with Daria and Jane--she was his friend once upon a time."

  • Of All The People That Won't Be Missed, by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "Well, the voice inside his head may sound sexy as hell but it was still something that they could send out the men in white coats to get him for and so it could get the hell out of his head. Either that or he was laying off the hallucinogens for a while in case this was some flashback."

  • The Selling (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'So Mack,' Jane said to her fellow alumni of the hellhole that was Lawndale High during their mini-reunion in her apartment, 'How'd you do it?'"

  • A Sinking Vote (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'They're jokes, Jane. I mean, both sides are exactly the same and voting is a waste of time, but I'm just a comedian and I bet this has no influence on people's behaviour. Cough.'"

  • Something (Slightly) Wicked Ch3, by macross (part 2): "As the bus slowly made its approach the eleven-year-old boy turned to his sister and said, 'I really don't wanna go to school today, or ever to be completely honest Andy.'"

  • A Sticky End (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "'Hmm,' Tom thought, examining the stairwell, 'We're going to need to find a way across to the other side. Daria, do you have an extension cable somewhere in your apartment?"

  • Sweet Dreams (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Yeah...uh...Quinn...I have a secret to tell you....' God, Stacy, I hope you're not gay! Quinn thought. She held her breath. 'O...kay?'"

  • Tom Sloane, Lax Bro, by Shiva (part 18): "As soon as the front door was firmly shut, Kay found herself sighing with relief. Her husband was now out of the house, her darling daughter was in New York with friends for a weekend shopping trip, and her son was... somewhere."

  • Untitled Random Story #5 (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "The whale was flying in the sky before it splashed down back into the blue skies with their fluffy white clouds but it needed the sweet, sweet water that contained the air that it breathed."

  • When Love Takes Another Path (IC: Early Meeting), by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Bernard Barksdale had just arrived at the top of the stairs when he heard himself called. 'Dad , have they stopped screaming ?'"

  • When the Bough Breaks, by Kristen Bealer (parts 4 - 6): "How do other people do this? She thought about her own parents. They went through it three times. How? And why would anyone have another one after experiencing this?" (Part 5) (Part 6)

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Hide and Seek



Caption this scene in the comments!

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Pizza and Art...Can't Beat That Combination!


Today is National Pizza With Everything (Except Anchovies) Day, and Daria and Tom are miserable because they just found anchovies on their pizza. Poor kids.

Sculptor Auguste Rodin, who may or may not be the creator of Steve Taylor's lawn jockey statue, was born on this day in 1840. For extra fandom fun, read The Angst Guy's Forgotten But Not Gone to see how else Rodin may be connected with Lawndale.

Fandom News!

Sunday, November 10, 2013

This Blog Post Is Brought to You by the Letter "D"


Daria has turned into a muppet in honor of Sesame Street, which premiered on this day in 1969. While Daria mourns the passing of the last shred of her dignity, I think this is a good place to recommend Mike Yamiolkoski's excellent fanfic D is for Daria.

Fanfic Update!
  • Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 14): "Axel's mood brightened considerably when he recognized Trent Lane, slowly walking down the street. The tattoo artist felt that the young musician was a kindred spirit as soon as he ever saw him."

  • The Dale of Lawn, by Wassersauefer (epilogue): "Mackenzie did not like the city of Trolltooth. It was cold, it was windy, the air stank of fish and stale sweat and the people, if you could call them that, were unpleasant at best and hostile at worst. But he could lay low here, hopefully surviving the next few years to... to do what?"

  • Deadgirl Wonderland, by SacredDust (part 3): "'So you saw a 'Red Man', did you Daria?' he mused as he looked over her profile. 'That's the same thing you said in the courtroom. Shame it didn't do you any good...but on the other hand, what a stroke of luck to see the Wretched Egg and live. I see you have a talent for surviving.'"

  • Death Comes to Another Lawndale, by PrecambrianStudios (part 8): "In the corner of my office, Judith stretched in her bean-bag chair. 'So, boss. Who's next up for extermination?'"

  • The Depths of Cedars, by ognawk (part 2): "Daria made her way to one of the rooms. She entered to see a man in a doctor's uniform lying on the bed inside. 'Dr Tom Sloane?' Daria asked. 'Dr Daria Morgendorffer M.D.' Tom stated, without even looking at his visitor."

  • Dressed Down (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'So do you think she's going to do it?' Stacy said to Quinn as the Fashion Club waited at Lawndale High after school. 'I don't know,' Quinn said. 'Fifty dollars is a lot of money.'"

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 32d): "Dylan leaned forward, peering at his brother's hands. 'Maybe it is. Maybe you've got an allergy to some kind of nut. Those can be very serious.'"

  • The Great And The Good, by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "'What's the matter, Tom? Having second thoughts?' Elsie asked. Tom stood still for a moment, and then looked at Elsie. 'No, we've come too far now,' he replied as the three of them made their way into the campus."

  • I Loaf A Parade (Pie, Pie, My Darling), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'I also like it when they throw candy from the floats,' Tad added. Daria suddenly grabbed Tad and lifted him up to eye level. 'They WHAT?'"

  • Love Kills (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "Much to Tom's surprise, a big smirk spread across Cassidy's face. 'I never knew you were so... cunning. I like that,' she said, as she stroked a finger up Ashley's chest."

  • A New Direction, by peetz5050 (parts 18 and 19): "Daria walked on to polite applause when she was introduced, air kissed Lydia, shook hands with Kevin and sat down demurely on the edge of the couch. She looked relaxed and confident and wore a small smile." (Part 19)

  • Not Gonna Look (The All New All-Purpose Creative Writing Thread), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "About halfway up, she saw Ashley coming down the stairs. He was wearing socks and a t-shirt that was half tucked into his boxer shorts, and his hair was messy. He was carrying two ice cream dishes."

  • Operation Cuckoo (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Congratulations, Daria - assistant editor on Cosmo!'"

  • Show A Little Tenderness (LongSnakeMoan's Fluff Thread), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "'Helen, get back here now. I said get back here now. I swear to God if you don't get back here now I will not be held responsible for my actions. Helen, now.'"

  • Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "As the scion of the mysteriously wealthy Sloane family, Tom Sloane walked his merry way up the road late at night because his 'slumming it' car died a final death and his cellphone battery was dead."

  • When the Bough Breaks, by Kristen Bealer (parts 2 and 3): "For a few seconds Jodie thought about racing to the door and yelling for Mack to come back. She wanted to scream, You can't leave me here alone!" (Part 3)

  • Wrong Glass (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "Tom was sat at a table in the bar as Luhrmann brought some drinks over for them."

Friday, November 8, 2013

Looks Like Helen's Going to be Ordering Pizza for Dinner Again Tonight


Jake's in the kitchen making a fresh batch of Kitchen Sink Stew (to his family's dismay) because today is Cook Something Bold Day. Because it doens't get much bolder than black tongues.

While Jake tries to remember the number for 911, let's wish a few people happy birthday! Bram Stoker, the author of Dracula (as opposed to either Brad or Sandi Griffin) was born on this day in 1847. Margaret Mitchell, who wrote the often-referenced-in-canon Gone With the Wind, was born on this day in 1900. And finally, Hermann Rorschach--of the Rorschach inkblot test--was born on this day in 1884. Let's all celebrate by watching a herd of beautiful wild ponies running free across the plains.

Fandom News!

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Mmmm...Nachos


Daria is suggesting that Beavis and Butt-head go get some snacks because today is National Nachos Day. Of course, any excuse to get rid of those two is a good one as far as she's concerned.

Fanfic Update!
  • And For My Next Trick and Problem Solving (LongSnakeMoan's Fluff Thread), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "She didn't know why she had agreed to help Upchuck out and be his assistant at his magic show when she just knew she was going to fail miserably at it. He'd convinced her that she was the perfect person for the job and for a second she'd believed him."

  • Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 13): "Helen Morgendorffer was looking through the pages of notebook paper spread out on the coffee table and making notes on the legal pad. She knew that winning the case brings her one step close to the partnership, and usually she needed no better incentive. But today her heart just wasn't in it."

  • Death Comes to Another Lawndale, by PrecambrianStudios (part 7): "Tom's eyes widened. He looked across the street and saw Cassidy Hemming waving to him. She started to cross the road. 'Oh no.'"

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 32c): "The pet store manager had one ear bandaged. 'Ms Mayhew, can I ask you a question about health and safety?' Dylan said, 'I assume while I'm working here I'll be covered by your insurance?'"

  • The Great And The Good, by ognawk (part 25.5): "Ashley frowned. 'Something on your mind?' 'Just some childhood memory I haven't thought about for a while,' Daria said with a sigh."

  • The Kiss of Death (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "'Exactly.' 'Alright then.' 'OK.' Suddenly, Tom reached over and kissed Daria, taking her completely by surprise."

  • A New Direction, by peetz5050 (part 16): "Family Dinner weekend after next will have to be on Sunday as that Country Club benefit is on Saturday. She'd have to fill the table or it would look bad, how many was it again? Eight or ten seats?"

  • Northbank Diaries #1: A Tale Of Three Suburbs, by ognawk (part 3): "People say he's just being nosey, but why is he taking such an interest in us? A 20-year old and a teenager, rail thin and living alone for months? I don't like this. I don't think he will either."

  • Something (Slightly) Wicked Ch3, by macross (part 1): "As the music began to play the satin covers were thrown back as a young woman rose from the bed stretching her arms and giving an impressive yawn."

  • Sonoma Coma, by jtranser (part 12): "Daria walked into the bathroom, then suddenly stopped when she saw her friend drying off while standing in a pile of red oozing shredded duckies, owls and submarines. 'Ah, Jane, another bathtub slaughter, I see.."

  • Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Trapped), by ashk09 (COMPLETE!): "Daria awoke to find herself lying in a field of verdant azure; in whichever direction she chose to cast her groggy eyes, it seemed that this entire world was made up of lush blue-green grass, platforms with strange markings emblazoned on them - they looked to be hieroglyphics of some sort, but she didn't recognise either the language, nor the strange anthropomorphic animals they depicted - and ... was that some kind of mechanical wasp patrolling the baby-blue skies above her?"

  • When Love Takes Another Path (IC: Early Meeting), by ST91 (part 2): "'And that's great, isn't it, Daria?' Tom asked his sister. 'Yeah great,' Daria said, in a half-hearted tone. 'What's up sweetie? Is something wrong?' said Helen. 'It's what dad ... I mean Angier said.' stated Tom. No one knew his sister better than him."

  • When the Bough Breaks, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "Jodie let herself fall back onto the hospital bed, catching her breath and waiting. For awhile--for too long--no one said anything. Then, finally...a small thin wail filled the silence."

Monday, November 4, 2013

The Sensitive King of Egypt


O'Neill is looking very proud and dignified for a man wearing such a short skirt, but he's here to tell us that on this day in 1922, King Tut's tomb was discovered. Exciting times, both for archaeology and future Saturday Night Live skits. Jake will celebrate by trying to finally solve that word puzzle on the back of his King Sugar Tut cereal box.

In fandom-relevant news, today is also Wendy Hoopes's birthday. The actress who voiced Helen, Quinn, and Jane turns 41 today. Happy birthday, Wendy! I hope your brother writes a good song for you.

Fandom News!

Saturday, November 2, 2013

I Just Hope Your Anguish Doesn't Start Acting Up


The many talented writers in fandom may be interested to know that yesterday was the beginning of National Novel Writing Month! This is the ideal time to write that book about a slightly older, sensitive man and the love a budding woman child feels for him when she gets to know him better. Or you could, you know, be normal and non-pervy. Totally your call.

Also, today's public service announcement: remember to set your clocks back one hour if you live in an area that observes daylight saving time. If you don't live in an area that observes daylight saving time, you can still set your clock back if you want to...but you'll probably end up late to work.

Fanfic Update!
  • Daria as the Doctor, by ashk09 (part 4): "'Do we, uh, actually have a plan?' asked Jane between breaths, scanning the terrain quickly to make sure there was nothing to trip her up. If any of this stuff were to leak out, the consequences would be unpleasant."

  • Deadgirl Wonderland, by SacredDust (parts 1 and 2): "At first she could barely see it through the haze, but something was rising up outside the window. Its face was obscured by a red mask, its body covered in...was that armor?" (Part 2)

  • Dylan, by J-D (part 32b): "'Hey, Dad, I found a job for Dylan!' 'You did? That's great, Kris! But weren't you looking for a job for yourself?'"

  • Eighties Night (LongSnakeMoan's Fluff Thread), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "As he was lost to the world he noticed a huge Pina Colada pushed in front of him, festooned with a blue umbrella floating on the top. He looked up and he felt himself smile. Here she was."

  • For Jane (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by SacredDust (COMPLETE!): "What a great day this had been! He'd broken up with his girlfriend after kissing her best friend, and apparently got off scot-free. Jane actually seemed angrier with Daria than she was with him. He didn't really get it, but...JACKPOT!"

  • The Great And The Good, by ognawk (part 25): "Hearing a knock at the front door, Jane switched the TV off and got up to answer it. She opened the door and what shocked to see Cassidy standing there with her head bowed."

  • Happy Halloween (IC: Hell is Crossed People), by GlitterShrooms (COMPLETE!): "Hi! My name's Quinn Anne Morgendorffer and I'm fourteen and a half years old. Today is a very special day for me. It's Halloween!"

  • If I Can't Have You... (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "'Jane,' Tom said, interrupting Jane and causing her to look straight at him, 'Just go. I'll take care of this and I'll see you later.'"

  • It Just Might Tear You Apart (It is October, after all), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "Ah, hello, my friend. I think a proper salutation might be in order. My name is Ted, and you are going to die."

  • Quinn's Code 09: Morgendorffers in the Woods, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "'Remember what the doctor said the last time you burst a blood vessel?' 'Yeah, he said it would be two hundred dollars.' Helen took Jake's hand in hers to reassure him. 'Before that. He said that we need to cut down your stress and we're going camping like we used to before...' she looked and saw that her daughters were still in the room."

  • Star Trek: Dyson Sphere: Multiplicity, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "The team backed off from the gateway, but then something happened. With a scream, a person arrived through the gateway. 'This cannot be!' T'Elanna said, as she looked at the other person. 'And yet it is,' Weralla said."

  • Tall Candles (LongSnakeMoan's Fluff Thread), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "'Eeeewww. It smells funny in here. Is that smell your caaaaandles?'"

  • Together Again, by ashk09 (COMPLETE!): "For some reason, the silence unsettled her; such peace was normally a positive boon, as it gave her time to read or write, but now, the quiet felt like an alive thing, pressing in all around her. Then, the whisper. Do you dream about me? Do you dream you're with me? Be honest."

  • Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by ognawk (COMPLETE!): "Jane tilted her head to the side slightly and grinned. Tom noticed a glint in her eye he'd never seen before."

  • Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by Serrallonga (COMPLETE!): "TOM - Mr. Morgendorffer! I can explain! (Jake takes a gun and shoots six times) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!"

  • Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane - Part II), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Tom!' Kay yelled at her idiot son, 'Stop teasing the alligators. And where did you get that chicken roast?"

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: Do What Now?), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "(Surface of the Sun begins to play over the MTV logo and a close-up of Daria's eyes opening) ANGELA LI (V/O): What's the last thing you remember?"

  • When Love Takes Another Path (IC: Early Meeting), by ST91 (part 1a): "'I've been waiting for you,' said Helen Sloane (nee Barksdale ). 'I know you. I know that when you come home late the first thing you do is put your briefcase away and then you come to bed.'"