Counting Down the End of 2010!

It's New Year's Eve, so get ready to party! If you're not into partying, you can curl up with Nemo Blank's epic The Mighty Quinn, which is set around New Year's Eve.

According to The Daria Database, several characters had a few New Year's resolutions that likely had varying levels of success:

Jake

• Learn the names of Quinn's friends.
• Learn the name of Daria's friend.
• Put the romance back in our marriage and stop faking like I'm asleep.
• Not let that punk at the racetrack talk back to me anymore.
• Let go of the fact that my father was a cold, spiteful man who sent me off to military school at a ripe and tender age and thereby ruined my life. No point in dwelling on it!

Helen

• Schedule more quality time with Daria and Quinn.
• Schedule more "intimite" time with Jake (before he falls asleep).
• Schedule more phone time with Mom.
• Schedule more time to "just relax."
• Increase billable hours by 30 percent.

Quinn

• I will try to add more bounce to my walk.
• I will finish inventorying those darn scrunchies!!!
• I will learn to accept the fact that other people are just jealous of me.
• I will be a better friend to Stacy so I can find out what Sandi's saying behind my back.
• I will try to tan more evenly.

Mack

• I will get Kevin to stop calling me "Mack Daddy" if it kills me.
• Next time Kevin wants to demonstrate how to stop a brick with his head, I'll let him.
• I will not show Ms. Barch fear, no matter what she does to me.
• I will stop fantasizing about tricking Brittany into jumping out a window.
• I won't let it bother me that Jodie puts student council, homework, tennis club, French club, the debate team, and just about every other damn thing ahead of me.

Brittany

• I will try to be nicer to people less popular than me (doesn't have to be every day).
• I will finally master the left-legged split.
• I will expand my vocabulary by learning a new word every month.
• I will figure out those self-adhesive stamps.
• I will continue teaching Kevin to be a gentleman. A lot of progress last year!

Jodie

• I will volunteer at the soup kitchen.
• I will learn Sanskrit.
• I will take a papermaking class.
• I will become a crossing guard.
• I will do anything to get out of the house so Dad will leave me alone about my grades and friends and what colleges I'm going to apply to and agggh!

Kevin

• MY NEW YEAR'S RESOL, RESSOU, RESULLATIN, RESLLUTI OH, FORGET IT!

Daria

• Stop wearing heart on sleeve.
• Master level 20 of CyberKron.
• Cut back on whirlwind social schedule.
• Grow further apart from Quinn.
• Shake up my routine: Order sausage instead of pepperoni.

Lots of fanfic potential in those, but I notice there are no resolutions from Jane. Do you have any resolution ideas for her or, for that matter, any Daria character? Post them in the comments!

And finally, the latest fandom news!

• Now that the PPMB move is complete, Scissors MacGillicutty offers a demo of youtube BBCode and a demo of Spoiler BBCode.


• Ranger Thorne started a thread for people to post their good, bad, and twisted Christmas stories.


• Derek and others offer advice about converting DVDs for your iDevice.


• Charles RB started a thread in Deep Thoughts about one difference between Highland Daria and Lawndale Daria.


• Doctor Who fans can discuss the latest Christmas special in this thread started by Charles RB.


• Erin M. asks, What are your favorite live-action Disney movies?


• DrNoGood09 started a thread about a list of The Top Twenty Scariest Cartoon Characters


• A new Iron Chef courtesy of RLobinske: Jane Lane and the Grand Opening and a new Iron Art courtesy of CR85747: B&Bize the supporting cast.

Bridge? Gin? Hearts? Done.

It's National Card Playing Day, so why don't we get together for a family card game just like we used to? Okay, fine, we've never played a family card game in our lives, but that doesn't mean we can't play a quick game of five-card stud. Jacks are wild.


BIG NEWS!

The PPMB will be moving on December 30th. Check the thread for all the details, like when the board will be closed. Better start packing now!

EVEN NEWER BIG NEWS!

The PPMB has successfully moved! Hooray!


Fanfic update:

• The Art of Cooking Pizza...and Other Things, by Doggieboy (COMPLETE!): "The silent alarms went off at just five minutes after noon, right as he lifted the coffee cup to his lips. Damn, he thought and sipped the Folgers Classic Roast. It never fails."


• The Cards You Are Dealt, by Doggieboy (part 9): "Please, Goddess, don’t let that roar mean what I think it does. She shuddered and nearly tripped over a slab of concrete that had been lifted by a tree root. Don’t let the cops get involved with this, either."


• Daria/Dorian 12: Spring Breaks, by LadieT (part 1): "Dorian, Jane, Jodie, and Mack were sitting in the cafeteria talking about vacation plans. Mack was going to be working with Kevin and his dad while Jodie's parents had filled her plate with volunteer work. When Jane told the others that she and Dorian were going to the beach, they sat stunned. Not because Jane convinced Helen and Jake to let Dorian go, but that Dorian wanted to go in the first place. They knew that the words beach and Daria would never have been in the same sentence."


• Family Game Night, by NapalmKracken (COMPLETE!): "TANYA I know this is a stupid question but do you have any remorse? LD Those little fish that suck on sharks? Awkward silence. TANYA That’s not funny. LD It was a little funny."


• Flynn at 1111 Glen Oak (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "'Good Morning, Agent P,' Major Francis Monogram said from the main view screen in Perry’s lair. Then a picture of Sandi appeared on the screen along-side his face. 'Doctor Doofenshmirtz has kidnapped this teenager. Her name is Alexandra Griffin, though apparently she prefers to be called "Sandi." All we have on her is that she is the ‘President’ of one of Lawndale High School’s extracurricular clubs. Get going and put a stop to his plan, whatever it is. We’re counting on you, Agent P!'"


• Having Themselves A Very Judith Christmas ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "The great class war had finally broken out in Lawndale, the rich armed with the finest combat weapons possible and the underclass with boards with nails in it. In the middle of the fight, Angier Sloane caught sight of the half-burning TV store. 'Something weird's going on on that channel!'"


• Having Themselves A Very Judith Christmas: Appendum ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "'...Yeah Kristen, it is on every channel,' Quinn said into the phone as she ran one of her hands through her short hair. 'Whoever these people imitating my sister and her friend are, they have really advanced technology.' 'From what they are saying, I think they are interdimensional doubles of Daria and Jane, and they are causing destruction on a scale we cannot imagine,' Kristen Bell said. as she looked at the scene unfolding on the television. 'It's on the radio too.'"


• Holiday Roadtrip, by Chris Tucker: "Instead of the usual t shirt, torn jeans and rather ragged sneakers that made up his day to day wardrobe, Trent Lane was Dressed. Leather loafers, charcoal gray slacks, simple belt, light blue cotton dress shirt, a necktie, albeit a skinny leather tie, loosely knotted and a tweed blazer. 'He does clean up nicely, doesn't he, Daria... Daria?'"


• In Silence Sarcastic, by Trscroggs: "Jodie grinned and stepped well within Daria’s personal space. Jodie made a show of checking for witnesses, completely missing the way Daria’s nostrils flared, before pulling a small paper bag out of her book bag. 'I’ve got your goods right here,' Jodie said in a bad Brooklyn accent. 'And let me tell you, this wasn’t easy to get on short notice.' Jodie smiled to show that the last was part of the joke."


• Jane Morgendorffer, by LadieT (part 30): "A few days before school started, Trent approached Helen and Jake. Although he was only a sophomore, he wanted to talk to them about college and what kind of grades it would take to get into a good one. He wanted to get a degree in business so that he could work with Jake full time. Trent knew that getting into music was hard and he wanted to do something he enjoyed while pursuing his dream. Seeing her husband's face light up, Helen assured Trent that as long as he kept a B average, they would help him go to college. As Trent left the room, Helen turned to Jake who still had the smile on his face."


• Lawndale Sucks, by Smijey: "'Hi! You're cool. What's your name?' asked a girl with pigtails. 'Quinn Morgendorffer,' she replied coolly. 'Cool name,' said another girl. 'So, are you Team Edward, or Team Jacob?'"


• The Order of Infinity ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "The massive, lighted ball had just completed its journey, and the hundreds of thousands of people that had jammed themselves into Times Square were celebrating – when the spiral of yellow light appeared in the middle of the crowd. For some reason, there was no stampede or mass hysteria; the people simply stood as a wave of silence washed across them – across the world, as cameras transmitted the image of the spiral opening up into a portal of yellow, and a single man walking through."


• Screams of Silence, by Jim North (part 12): "The slight quiver of Quinn's phone makes me twitch involuntarily. I immediately stop walking and scan the fog while pulling out my pistol. I point it down at the sidewalk and place my thumb on the hammer, ready to cock it back the second the vibrations get too rowdy for comfort. But as I take a few cautious steps forward, they stay relatively the same. And that's when I hear it. A steady, repetitive thumping noise coming from the other side of the half-constructed wall I'm walking alongside. After a couple of seconds, the thumps seem to match up to the phone's vibrations, almost as if they were echoing each other somehow."


• Spirit of the Game, Nature of the Beast, by HolyGrail2007 (prologue and part 1): "'Well, I can tell you, I guess. Elsie’s going to head off somewhere and my parents are out. Listen to my story. God knows I’ve remembered it time and time again. Maybe you can tell me who was wrong and who was right.'" (Part 1)


• Super Daria Bros. (Iron Chef: Super Daria Sisters), by project pegasus (part 4): "Kevin: It's an umpah-lumpah! Toad: (Trying to be diplomatic) I'm sorry, but you must be confused. I am a retainer of the Mushroom Kingdom, and I have your mission briefing. Kevin: Don't worry. I know the drill: don't eat the candy that turns you into a giant blueberry. I got it."


• Unnamed story (A Christmas Iron Chef), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane walked into the Morgendorffer home and stopped dead just past the threshold. They stared goggle-eyed at the Saturnalia orgy taking place on the first level of the house, their noses wrinkled at the indescribable stench of sex, liquor and clotted cream. For some reason, there were large-denomination bills scattered over the carpet."


• Worldburner: A Very Judith Christmas, by Erin Mills, Brother Grimace, Charles RB, and Overlord Mikey (parts 1 - 3): "Reiko reached into the inner pocket of her jacket and withdrew the card. She handed it to Richard, who grimaced at it. The front of the card was a cartoon of Judith standing in a snowbank, a festive scarf around her neck, holding the disembodied head of Santa Claus. Behind her, NegaJane was ransacking the sleigh, while idly kicking Rudolph in the nuts. Richard opened the card." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Worldburner: Amelia and the Planet of the Hippies, by Charles RB (part 1): "Of all the Defender Ring’s endowments, the power to banish dark forces from a universe was one of the greatest. And Amelia had been practising all bloody week and was truly, truly hoping that she just had the one faulty Ring in the whole Corps. The alternative was too embarrassing to contemplate."

Float like a Butterfly, Sting like a Fashionista

Happy Boxing Day! Apparently today has more to do with giving to the poor than with pummeling people into oblivion, but I think this would be an excellent tradition to add to the holiday. Stacy's getting into the spirit, right?

Also on this day in 2004, the first entry was posted to the original Daria Fandom Blog, run by CINCGREEN. It may have ended a few years ago, but the legacy lives on in this very blog. Thanks, CINCGREEN!


Fandom News!

• rglovejoy has posted pictures from his Holiday Trip to Panamá.


• Brother Grimace has started a Thread of Facepalm Bait and Derek has started its counterpart, The Thread of Epic Win.


• Chris Tucker started a new Iron Chef: A Christmas Iron Chef.

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas, everyone! While our friend X is forced to spread love and joy 24 hours a day and searches for one of those little cottages all made out of gingerbread, why not enjoy this list of Christmas-related Daria fanfics?

• Bumpmas by Richard Lobinske


• The Christmas Clip Show by Mahna Mahna


• Christmas Eve at the Lanes by Adrienne


• Christmas in White by Richard Lobinske


• Christmas Melody by Richard Lobinske


• Christmas Morning by Robert Nowall


• Christmas Snow by LadieT


• A Daria Christmas Special by Bacner


• Daria's Christmas Carol by Admonisher


• Daria's Season of Goodwill by Nemo Blank


• The Diary of Daria Morgendorffer: A Portrait of a Young Girl by Melissa


• Gifts by Wyvern


• Herself, an Elf by John Berry


• It's a Wonderful Misery Chick Life by Patrick Moore


• The Lane Way by Vlora


• Murphy’s Christmas by legendeld


• O Holy Nightmare by Jill "Leopard Lady" Friedman


• Sappy Holidays by Kristin Wegner


• Season of Hope and Blight by MeScribble


• Scene from a Lawndale Christmas by undefinedlust


• A Star in the East Window by Guy "Decelaraptor" Payne


• A Very Cynical Christmas by Warpedkjh13


• Weak at the Freeze by Fiona Lane


• Yes, Quinn... by NightGoblyn

Ho, Ho, Ho!

It's Christmas Eve! Don't forget to leave cookies out for Santa and/or your favorite blogger. (As an unrelated aside, I like the chocolate ones.)

Posts might be a little sparser for awhile, because I'll be out of town for the next week. I'll try to keep up with updates, though, and there will still be posts showing up in the meantime.

Now, instead of a naughty-or-nice list, I've got a shiny new fanfic list. Check it twice!

• All in the Family (Iron Chief: Tom Lane), by project pegasus (COMPLETE!): "Tom: Daria, I know this might be a bit sudden, but would you like to participate in a threesome with me and Trent?"


• The Cards You Are Dealt, by Doggieboy (part 8): "The girl scooted up against her boyfriend and laid her head over on his upper right arm. 'John, I didn't mean to upset you,' she said. 'I really didn't. But how could I tell you that and not sound like an absolute nut job? Think about it. You didn't know, yourself. Suddenly I come up and say, "The doctor says that our baby is O.K., and oh, by the way, you're a werewolf. Now let's have dinner."'"


• Daria and Link, by Smijey (part 1): "Daria read from her book, desperately hoping that she would go deaf soon so she wouldn't have to listen to the 'sensitive-ized' version of 'This Old Man' sung by Mr. O'Neill and much of the other children. Her mother had signed her up for the Okay to Cry Corral since it was closer to Lawndale than Camp Grizzly, not to mention cheaper. The only bright spot was that her babysitter, Jane Lane, had coincidentally volunteered to be one of the counselors at the camp."


• Daria and the Chocolate Factory, by Smijey (part 2): "Daria hadn't foreseen the increase in popularity at school she experienced as a result of being the first golden ticket winner. Her teachers all congratulated her (with Ms. Li making a point to boast about it to the whole school via the PA system), whereas many of the students pestered Daria to take one of them. Even after she explained only family members were permitted to join her, some of her fellow students persisted. Kevin Thompson was the most persistent of these; his constant haranguement of Daria caused Brittany to break up with him seven times, and he only left Daria alone after she threatened to tell Ms. Barch."


• God Save The Esteem ep15: Kneel Before Zon, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Quinn leaned back in her chair, comfortable in her grade: another C Minus. There'd be a brief and horrible moment when she'd started getting some C Pluses, but she'd got her grade back down to proper, up-the-man's standards. There was no way she was ever going to follow the man's educational dictat! Except in Science, when it came to dissections. Obviously." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)


• The Greatest Gift, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "Entering the kitchen, Daria was surprised when her mother came walking towards her with a package. Helen handed Quinn one as well. Daria looked carefully at the brown paper and read the name of the sender. From: Amy Barksdale"


• Holiday Roadtrip, by Chris Tucker: "As they went in, Daria saw her parents sitting on the sofa in the semi-darkness. His arm around her shoulders, her head on his shoulder, right hand gently holding right hand. Jake leaned his head back. 'Hi, there. Have a good time, you two?', he said quietly."


• Life Beyond Highland (Iron Chef: Lawndale State), by LadieT (part 6): "Walking outside, Daria fought to stop the tears that were forming in her eyes. A few minutes later, a woman stepped out of the bar and stared at her. Daria looked at the obvious hair-dye job (the black color was dripping from her hair) and shrugged. Daria tried to ignore the person, but the woman's presence was starting to get under Daria's skin. In her annoyance, Daria's guard had slipped and the tears had started to fall."


• Loving the one who Loved, by OverlordMikey (part 1): "Tom walked to the padded walls and felt them; the questions of why he was in this room had eluded him. Perhaps he was just avoiding the crowds forming downstairs. He instead placed his head against the walls and found tears had begun to stream down his cheeks. 'Tom, shouldn't I be the one doing that?' Came a monotone voice form behind. He turned quickly to see a sigh that was both a relief and a horror."


• My Wings Are All A-Quiver, by InvisibleDan (COMPLETE!): "At noon, the doorbell rang. He got up to get the door as everyone else was out, and he opened it to find Jane there. 'You... You son of a bitch!' She flailed at him with her fists, hitting him on the chest and shoulders but doing little harm. 'I'm sorry! I was going to tell you!' He tried to block her but she kept on hitting."


• Quinn's Code - Story 1: The Esteemsters Code, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 2): "'So you want to join the Computer Club?' Mack asked. 'Yeah, and the Programming Club. Programming stuff is very cool! Except when there are bugs, but I enjoy the challenge of solving them. Many of the special characters are cute,' Quinn said."


• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (part 38): "Daria then saw that Sam was standing right behind them. She didn't even see him coming. These two guys were taller than her, but Sam towered over them. She had never seen anyone so enraged. Sam grabbed the taller one, Artie, by the scruff of his jacket and threw him against the wall."


• Screams of Silence, by Jim North (parts 9 - 11): "The tone cuts off abruptly, replaced by a soft whirring as it vibrates madly in my hand. I cast about fruitlessly for a place to hide as the tapping comes ever closer. I may have taken one of the creatures down already, but it was mostly luck. I don't want to have to face another one, so I do my best to flatten myself against the wall running along the sidewalk and hope that it just passes me by." (Part 10) (Part 11)


• The Two Americas, by Charles RB (part 7): "With her eyes on her feet she couldn't see the mob, and the yelling and the obscenities all merged into an unintelligible noise. That wouldn't have been so bad if the noise hadn't been everywhere, a world of nothing but screaming hate. Something struck her in the shoulder and she bit her lip rather than cry out; white paint arced over the group and she tried to ignore that too. It didn't work. This is what Jodie and Mackenzie deal with all the time."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Super Daria Sisters), by project pegasus (parts 2 and 3): "Sandi: That's enough! Now listen, Tiffany, Stacy, you walk aimlessly to the left and when you reach the edge of the cloud, walk in the opposite direction. Quinn, you and I will walk to the right, and when we reach the edge of the cloud, we'll turn around and go in the other direction." (Part 3)


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "'I have released Brainiac's exobites into earth's atmosphere!' Luthor stared down the Dark Knight and the Man of Steel. Behind the two of then, he saw that Wonder Woman had turned to a nearby console and was glaring intently at the changing readings. 'Those exobites hold the powers of the heros and villians of my time -- yours incluced -- and will bestow them on anyone they touch! They will create a new bread of superhuman! They will be on the front line that will fight Brainiac's invasion and you must teach them to use their new abilities!'"


• A Well-Adjusted World, by Charles RB: "Three months in this hellhole and he still didn't get it - sure, everywhere had been hit by the global recession when both Halloween and Christmas failed for no reason back in 2000, but why was Lawndale so much worse than anywhere else? And weird things had happened before then too."


• Worldburner: When It Rains, by RLobinske (part 6): "Their slices consumed, they waited and, right on schedule, Richard and Victoria sensed danger behind them as Judith gated in not twenty feet away. 'I wondered who they would send to stop me,' Judith said, her red cloak flapping around her like an animal straining against a leash. 'The boy scout, the daddy's girl and a garden variety, snot-nosed bitch. I'm insulted. I expected more.'"

It's a Festivus Miracle!

Happy Festivus! A holiday for the rest of us! Today we celebrate by the airing of grievances (left) and displaying feats of strength (right).

To my knowledge, the only Festivus Daria fanfic is Bettie and Jack at Festivus by Gene. If there are more, please do let me know and I'll add them here.

In the meantime, here's the latest fandom news:

• Teeki finally got a new car! Woo hoo!


• Charles RB has a few thoughts about O'Neill's letter to Helen in "Quinn the Brain."


• What was the best thing you saw on TV in 2010?


• The Write-Off Challenge is still going strong. Post in the thread if you want to join in!


• Kael Seoras is looking for advice on a scene idea.


• Diane Long has posted her old Daria stories at ff.net. If you haven't read them yet, check them out!


• Two new Iron Chefs are going on in the Creative Writing forum: Do Your Eyes Hypnotize? by Erin Mills and A Miserable Life? by CR85747.

I Hope Yule Enjoy the Winter Solstice!

Today is Yule and the Winter Solstice, as Mother Nature Barch is happy to tell us. I'm not sure Ms. Barch is really the most nurturing, maternal figure in the world, but maybe she just represents the less pleasant aspects of nature like the hurricanes and thunderstorms and violent misandry.

Also on this day, in 2002, Karen and Derek had a vow renewal/wedding reception in Richard Lobinske's Falling Into College fanfic "Christmas in White."

And while we're on the subject of fan-fiction, allow me to introduce today's fanfic update!

• 86 Bottles of Beer 3: All Creatures Great and Maul, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'Now's our best chance,' Kevin told 99 as quietly as possible. 'If we don't act soon, there's no way we'll get out of here.' Although 99 nodded slightly in reply, she looked worried. 'Don't worry; I have a brilliant escape plan.' Now she looked even more worried. Kevin turned to Matthews. 'What on earth is that?!' he cried. Matthews turned to look, and Kevin hit him in the jaw with a solid right hook."


• Daria/Dorian 11: So This Is Bonding, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "Jake called Helen from the hotel room. Dorian heard the words giant sleepover followed by the sound of laughter coming from his father's mouth. After hanging up the phone, Jake and Dorian loaded their luggage onto a cart and headed out the door. Jake filled Dorian in on the events at Schloss Morgendorffers the night before. I can't wait to hear about this one from Jane."


• Fallout: Journeys (Non-Daria), by Vukodlak (parts 1 and 2): "Our story begins in 2294, with a young William Almodovar. He was born in Vault 101 and has spent everyday of his sixteen year old life there. He never knew his father, which is why today he is leaving the vault. Before he was born his father was exiled from the vault. William looked back to the cave containing the massive door to Vault 101, was he doing the right thing he wondered, Should I go back? No I've got to keep moving forward my father is out there somewhere and I'm going to find him." (Part 2)


• The fiercest battles lie within, by VPrad (COMPLETE!): "It was then that Tom understood. He had won a battle, but there was a fiercer battle within him. His father's shadow would still be there to haunt him, and he would have to fight against it to feel free. But that didn't worry him, he felt peace inside, he knew that he wouldn't fight alone. Next to him he had the best ally he could hope for."


• Genesis, by VPrad (part 3): "'I've done some research of my own. The Morgendorffer sisters were two of the best extractors, of course with the help of their faithful team. Your reputation was getting bigger and bigger as were your jobs. And then, one day you just quit. You went from stealing ideas to teaching other people's minds to avoid being manipulated, just like that. Something had to happen to make you change your mind about breaking into the subconscious overnight. My guess is that you tried an inception and it failed. Am I wrong?' 'It didn't fail.' Quinn said looking down. 'It worked. It worked too well.'"


• God Save The Esteem Ep14: Splatoon, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Mack had agreed to walk his girlfriend Angie home, which was normal. His silence... well, that wasn't normal. It wasn't the right kind of silence, where he wasn't entirely sure what to say that she'd ‘get'. This was the silence when someone was wondering whether to press that red button." (Part 4)


• Holiday Roadtrip, by Chris Tucker: "At the Mall, Daria pointed out the Megamultiplex, and the scam that she and Quinn pulled almost weekly for months, using Daria's sickly appearance and wheelchair to get moved to the head of the ticket line, sometimes even scoring a free ticket for Quinn and free popcorn, too. 'When I started to lose the whole "recovering cancer patient" look, we had to knock it off. Ah, good times...'" (Updated here)


• It's the King!? WTF? (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "Helen and Jake had called their daughter's downstairs. 'Girls we have something to tell you.' Helen said, trying her best to smile."


• Jane Morgendorffer, by LadieT (part 29): "Seeing her mother upset when she returned from the airport angered Jane. Now Jane was sitting in their room, writing in her notebook with a scowl on her face. After several minutes of watching her sister writing furiously, Daria tapped Jane on the shoulder. Jane looked up from her desk and over at a pair of concerned hazel eyes."


• Legends Of The Metal, by TheExcellentS (part 12): "Tom grabbed his axe and slowly got out of the car, ready to strike. Suddenly, the robed figure flipped back its hood and turned around. To his surprise it wasn't a druid, but a normal-looking woman with wavy auburn hair and glasses. She looks like an older version of Daria. 'Well it's about time someone got here!' she yelled."


• Life Beyond Highland (Iron Chef: Lawndale State), by LadieT (part 5): "Daria closed her eyes and stood speechless as she tried to wrap her mind around the sentence that Jane had just uttered. For her part, Jane was trying to scope her new friend's reaction. She was half expecting Daria to bolt out of the room never to be seen again. Instead, she could see a hint of anger come over the shorter girl's face. Jane wasn't sure what was going on in the shorter woman's mind, so she braced herself for a potential onslaught."


• LLH Alternative Future 05 - Pre-emptive Counerattack, by psychotol (COMPLETE!): "'Tiffany?' Tiffany looked over to the Commander. She had to figure out a way to get through this situation. Tiffany was a SEAL, she supposedly lived for difficult, but some difficulties are more equal than others. She formulated a response and, hope in her heart, deployed it. 'It's not any one thing, you know, it's a whole bunch of things, and sometimes it all just boils over.'"


• Manifest Destiny (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by Cap (COMPLETE!): "There were few choices but Jane was happy to see that Daria took the desk next to hers. The new girl was something to divert her attention from class. Despite its proximity to the country's capital, few foreigners passed though Lawndale even Germans who excepting perhaps the British were America's closest ally."


• The New Tiffany (Iron Chef: Freaky Friday "VA Version"), by GlitterShrooms (COMPLETE!): "Pity thought the real Ms Barch. It's such a shame to see that happen to my body, but at least I won't have to worry about switching back. Now, I finally get the chance to live a real life with all the resources and oppurtunities that the old me never had before!"


• Scarlett the Fairy goes out for Pizza, by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "When the plane landed, and she left, the skies were dark and foggy. As a result, she had absolutely no idea where she was. So she flew towards the nearest building and nearly cried when she read the sign. Welcome to Chicago"


• Searching For a New Hope, by thatLONERchick (part 4): "Daria's eyes snapped up just in time for her to dodge away from the crazy artist, who laughed maniacally as she chased the shorter girl around, swinging the map like a sword. She managed to corner Daria near a guitar case in the back left corner, the auburn-haired girl standing with arms held out in a placating gesture as her six-legged friend buzzed on her shoulder. 'Okay, Jane.' She made to take another step back, but her boot bumped the guitar case and stopped. 'Drop the map and back away from the bee.'"


• The Two Americas (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by Charles RB (parts 4 - 6 plus interlude): "'Ah'm the only white student called into this office, when Ah didn't do nothing except not pick on someone. And before Ah came in, you had that negro who hit when provoked but none a' the guys who hit him. Why, it almost looks like yer not targetin' the troublemakers but their victims cos that's easier." "Yes." That remark killed the conversation stone dead. It took a while for Daria to get her mouth to work again." (Part 5) (Interlude: Notes from Hawaii) (Part 6)


• Unnamed story (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'Now get out there and have a gosh-darn-terrific day, kids!' 'Sure thing, Dad!' the girls said in unison as they stepped out of the car and waved as it slid away on its hoverplates. After the gravcar angled up and took off into the clear blue smog-free sky, they turned and made their way up the steps of Lawndale High School to where two cheerful brunettes greeted them."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Do Your Eyes Hypnotize?), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'You are safe and calm, feeling a warm, gentle breeze. Every bone in your body is relaxing. Easy...easy...At the count of ten, you will tell me everything you are feeling with no resistance...' As he counted down, Daria felt a growing sense of dread, like a viewer of a horror film felt when the buxom actress walked through the dark cabin wearing only a towel. 'Three...two...one. Daria, tell me what you are feeling.' 'Daria? That's not right. My name is Melody.' Daria's voice wasn't in her usual sullen, laid-back tone. It was harder...it had an edge to it."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Super Daria Sisters), by project pegasus (part 1): "Toad: Dario, Luijane, stop it you two! You must rescue the Princess! Luijane: (Staring at the squat toadstool man) Oh-ah great! In Soviet Russia, the mushrooms hallucinate you!"


• The Vision of the Burning Cities, by jtranser: "At that moment, Daria reached the last step as all the light in the universe curved tightly around her, injecting energy as her body transformed into a cold fire that burned intensely without consuming anything. Looking through all directions, she became aware of the great presence that brought her there. Prodigious currents of pure randomness flickered through Her aura as She moved to greet Her possible replacement: 'And so we meet again, Daria.'"

Every Time a Bell Rings, a Cynic Gets a Love Life

On this day on 1995, the Beavis and Butt-head episode It's a Miserable Life aired. In it, we learn that if Butt-head had never been born, Daria would be not only be much happier, but would also have a boyfriend (see left).

Makes you wonder what the show Daria would have been like under those conditions, doesn't it? For one thing, a happy, well-adjusted Daria probably would not have been placed in self-esteem class, so she would have been less likely to meet Jane. Which means--gasp!--we should be glad Butt-head was born, after all! Merry Christmas, you wonderful old garden gnome!

Okay, now for some fandom news:

• Kara Wild is done creating the new PPMB database! Moving day is coming soon!


• Quiverwing reminds everyone that we only have 22 days left to nominate fanfics and artwork for the Daria Fandom Awards!


• DrNoGood09 has started a thread about Christmas songs that we love and hate. Warning: You will probably leave that thread with at least three annoying songs stuck in your head.


• breitasparrow found an interesting definition of "Daria" on Urban Dictionary, and a funny thread was born!


• Good luck to HeirOfNorton, who is applying to grad school to become a librarian! An honorable and glorious profession, if I do say so myself!


• Erin M. has posted a new micro-shared world idea: A Very Judith Christmas.


• Jim North has started a thread about 2010 fanfics and fanfic plans for 2011.


• It's a great time for Iron Chefs lately, as there are two new ones: Freaky Friday "VA Version" from GlitterShrooms and Tom Lane from Vukodlak.

Caption Contest!

Reviving a fine DFB2 tradition!

What did Jane see behind Daria? Post your answer in the comments.

Happy Birthday, Don and Bill!

Happy 61st birthday to Don Johnson, star of Miami Vice and impersonated by Kevin on the right!

Today is also Bill of Rights Day, established by Franklin Roosevelt in 1941 to commemorate the ratification of the Bill of Rights. Virginia, the final state to ratify, did so on this day in 1791.

I wonder if the Holiday Island versions of Bill of Rights Day and Human Rights Day ever hang out together?

Fanfic update? I've got yer fanfic update right here, buddy!

• 86 Bottles of Beer 3: All Creatures Great and Maul, by Kristen Bealer (part 2): "'A wedding in the middle of a weekday morning?' Kevin asked, confused. 'That seems like a pretty flimsy excuse. Besides, why would every single person who works at the pet store be at the wedding? And not only that—' 'I think the sign being written on paper with a KAOS letterhead might, like, have something to do with it, Kevin,' 99 pointed out."


• Amelia Beats Up Judith (...Sort Of) ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Sighing, she turned round and saw Judith looking at her. Judith looked back. Amelia quietly peed herself."


• Daria/Dorian 11: So This Is Bonding, by LadieT (part 5): "Jane was surprised to see Amy's red convertible in her driveway. Before jumping into the backseat, Jane gave Amy and Lillian a quick hug. On the drive to Schloss Morgendorffer, Jane filled Amy and Lillian in on what occurred between her and Ms. Barch. Her two adopted aunts complimented her on the way she had handled the situation. As they pulled up to Dorian's house, Quinn opened the door with a smirk on her face."


• The fiercest battles lie within, by VPrad (part 30.2): "Tom was rolling in pain on the floor, all his strength had apparently disappeared. Angier took advantage of his son’s weakness to go get the gun that had fallen from his hands. He was about to finish his son once and for all. Everything seemed to be over for Tom. It wasn’t a bad ending after all, he had managed to stop his father’s plans and save a lot of lives in the process, he would have to pay with his life. He would die to do the right thing, it wasn’t so bad."


• General Semantics, Private Angst, by gwrtheyrn (part 33): "'They told us this, in high school science class. If two energies can be attuned to a twenty-decimal approximation of similarity, the "greater" will bridge the gap to the "lesser" as if there were no gap, although the juncture is effected at finite speeds.'"


• Holiday Roadtrip, by Chris Tucker: "The rest of the evening was given over to conversation, mainly about college life at Raft and Connie's life in Louisiana. The assault on Daria by Jane, and the resultant snowball fight at the rest stop left Quinn helpless with laughter. There was a look in Daria's eyes that hinted at something awful happening to Quinn should snow and the opportunity present itself."


• Jacob Morgendorffer, Esq., by Cap (COMPLETE!): "Daria glanced at her father proudly. He was the one who uncovered the swindle with a little inadvertent help from her and Jane. He spent months carefully gathering the proof, judicious that was irrefutable, before he went public. Once he was satisfied of that, he announced at a meeting of the Board of Aldermen the previous March what he learned. The legal beagles of the city, state and federal governments as well as the media pounced on it."


• The James Lane Chronicles Chapter 4, by InvisibleDan (COMPLETE!): "'Uh, hi Daria. I see you've decided not just to lose your glasses but also your skirt. And put on pants, I mean.' 'I thought that I might try something new. Something not so old-fashioned. Something a bit more nineties.' 'Yes, I did hear that blue jeans are in again after years of everyone wearing zoot suits and knickers. I think I overheard your sister saying something about that.' James saw Daria scowl at him, and he said, 'But they look good on you...'"


• Life Beyond Lawndale, by LadieT (parts 3 and 4): "Heading back upstairs, Daria went over to where the folder Jane had been looking at. Flipping through all of the articles she had either written or photogrpahed for, she stopped and pulled out the laminated clipping. Daria ran her finger over her father's obituary photo and let a rare tear fall down her cheek." (Part 4)


• Quinn's Code - Story 1: The Esteemsters Code, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "'Computer Club? Why do you, like, want to know about that? It's full of Geeks!' Sandi said. Quinn was outraged. 'I am a Geek! And I was popular at my last school, despite that status! So far Lawndale appears to be much better than Highland, so I am sure I will be a popular geek here too!' She ran off towards the school."


• The Two Americas (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by Charles RB (part 3): "Noise was breaking out from where the negroes were sitting, and when she looked over she saw her sister with the group, part of the quartet standing around Landon. That made Daria get up, ‘accidentally’ moving her chair back into the gut of whoever was standing (“OW!” screamed Charles Ham – haw, haw)."


• Unnamed story (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by Doggieboy (COMPLETE!): "Daria stood at the side of the street waiting for the parade to begin and felt miserable. She'd rather be at home and in bed, but that might end up being misinterpreted. One couldn't afford that right now."



• Unnamed story (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Daria had lasted a grand total of three days in the Star Scouts, and the mere thought of joining COYOPA filled her with disgust - even though she understood the propaganda better than her dim-witted sister who only understood party cant and a variety of sing-alongs."


• The Vision of the Burning Cities, by jtranser: "Jane gently took Daria by the hand and led her away. With just a jump to the left, and then a step to the right, they were standing in front of the Secret Force Leather Goods Shop in the burned out galleria."


• The War on Christmas, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): Christmas had a skeptical look on his face, but chose to ignore it. 'Daria, I need your help!' 'My help?' Daria looked around, half-worried that one of the other freaks from Holiday Island would be showing up soon. 'Yeah! There's a war on Christmas!' Daria stared blankly at the personification of Christmas. 'Have you been watching Fox News?'"


• Way Too Cute, by Smijey (part 3): "Ms. Li ignored the question. '--I feel it would be best to utilize your face to improve the image of Lawndale High.' Daria sighed. 'I hope this involves Nicholas Cage and John Travolta.'"


• Worldburner: When It Rains, by RLobinske (part 5): "Richard used his computer to active Victoria's and brought up a display. 'Something unexpected. When the AGI breached Castle Doom's firewall, you were able to save an image of the AGI's root command structure. It includes a Clarke Class AI virus.' 'In other words, a Doomsday virus.' 'Yes. But instead of the virus destroying the AGI root command, it was incorporated instead. So we are dealing with a fusion between the two.'"

As Seen on "This TV Movie about This Really Cute Family of Teens Who Got Stranded During a Hurricane"!

Hey, everyone! It's National Cocoa Day! Finally, a holiday I can support 100%. According to Quinn, it goes well with hurricanes, but I say you need not wait for a natural disaster. Don't forget the marshmallows!

While you sip, here's a fandom news update:

• Kara Wild has transferred board software for the PPMB to the new site. The Big Move is another step closer!


• Ranger Thorne has posted an early present for the members of PPMB.


• Charles RB attended the London student fee protest and posted about the experience.


• If you're dealing with snow right now, commiserate here!


• Congratulations to Deref's daughter, who graduated with a BSc from the University of Canberra!


• OverlordMikey now has a spotlight thread.


• CR85747 has posted some thoughts about the upcoming tenth anniversary of IICY?


• Roentgen muses about Daria and sibling relationships.


• peapotmaster wonders about setting up a Daria review podcast.


• There are three new Iron Chefs in the Creative Writing forum: What would Lawndale be like if..., To Volunteer is to say; "Use Me", and Arranged Marriage.

"Come on down!"

On this day in 1923, the now-retired game show host Bob Barker was born. That makes him...83? 91? 87? Ah, 87 was the closest without going over. Thanks for playing!
For those unfamiliar with the show The Price is Right, Jesse is demonstrating "The Big Wheel" game on the right. Get over there and spin that wheel!

Today is also the anniversary of the birth of Edvard Munch, the artist who painted The Scream. Born in 1863, Munch's work was most likely a significant influence on Jane, especially her "art colonies suck" period.

And now, finally, is the fanfic update!

• 86 Bottles of Beer 3: All Creatures Great and Maul, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "CONTROL Agent 86, known to the public as Kevin Thompson, was whistling on his way to headquarters. The sun was shining, a gentle breeze was blowing, and a small brown squirrel was sinking its teeth into his ankle."


• Betrayal (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "'Daria, Jake how could you do this. Plotting against your own mother. Have mercy!' 'Like how Quinn and you plotted against us before? No Helen, the time for mercy has long since passed' Daria stated flatly."


• The Cards You Are Dealt, by Doggieboy (parts 6 and 7): "'What do you want with me?' John said and fought to keep from shaking - or just even running in panic. 'I don’t have time to discuss your problems, so make it quick.' Kevin’s glared at John, ran up to him and punched him in the face. As the teacher backed up in shock and felt his lip, the other two students moved to flank him. He looked at them uncertainly, then back at the first student." (Part 7)


• The Confrontation (Whatever happened to Tommy Sherman), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part ): "A few minutes later he was surprised by a rapping on the window and 'Um, like, Hello! People would like to be served here!' said in a slightly snarky tone. Tommy turned to see a young, obese, woman with very short brown hair at the window. 'It is a pity she is so fat. She would otherwise be hot!' he thought."


• Daria/Dorian 11: So This Is Bonding, by LadieT (part 4): "Jane had spent the rest of that night thinking about what Dorian had said. Staring at the empty canvas in front of her, she began to paint, uncertain on where her inspiration would take her. Several hours later, she looked at the portrait in front of her and smiled. It was she and Dorian watching from a distance as Lawndale High was being imploded."


• Eye on the Ball, by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): "Helen may not have understood the fascination of baseball, but getting thrown off a team wasn’t a good thing, and it would mean Finn wouldn’t have an activity for this season. Being able to spend time there meant Helen could get more work done in peace, since Jake was all too eager to spend time doing that with Finn. But now, Helen supposed she would have to take off." (Part 11)



• The fiercest battles lie within, by VPrad (part 29 and 30.1): "And then, the moment he had feared so much arrived, a silhouette stood in front of him. It was the man he had arrived to hate the most, a person who had proved capable of doing the most despicable acts. It was a man who was planning to kill a building full of innocent people, poisoning a whole town and executing his own son in the process, just to gain some money." (Part 30.1)


• The First Week: Day One, by Chris Tucker: "It was a cold December Saturday in Boston. The three friends had diverse errands to see to in the city and agreeed to meet up at the Prudential Center food court for lunch and then off to the GooglePlex by the Boston Common for a movie."


• God Save The Esteem Ep14: Splatoon, by Charles RB (parts 1 and 2): "'Hey, Mum – there’s this form school wants you to sign-' Helen looked at the document like it was a dead rat, then grabbed it, pulled out a lighter, and set it on fire. 'Fuck their rules and regs! Fuck 'em!'" (Part 2)

>
• How a Star Was Born (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "'I said "NO!"' Quinn Morgendorffer yelled at the director, her hands on her hips. 'What part of "NO!" don’t you understand?'"


• Innocent Dreams at The Shore of Inversion and the Cliff of Affinity (Iron Chef: A Sparkle), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "It had been ten years since she first left Lawndale High school and headed to college. All those years away from her father, her step-mother, and her brother. She’d visit now and again, but sometimes she wondered what kept her away for months at a time, but she knew that answer in her heart. I had never belonged here, this place kept me from truly being my own person."


• It's Eureka, Daria: Spiral Dynamics, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "'Uh-oh,' Patrick said, seeing a heavy valve crossing the tunnel that was dripping thick, tan foam. The valve was part of a pipe running from somewhere deeper in the structure to the bunker area where the band was playing. There was a bent linkage connecting the jammed valve to an actuator set in the wall. Squeaks and groans from inside the valve told him it was under pressure." (Part 8)


• The James Lane Chronicles Chapter 4, by InvisibleDan (part 5): "'Look, my mom and dad wanted me to invite you over for dinner. They want to get to know you better.' 'Hmm. I guess that's because you never talk to them if you can help it, especially not about me.' 'You know me too well.' There was a long pause. 'And I have a surprise for you too.'"


• Jane Morgendorffer, by LadieT (part 28): "Knowing that she wasn't going to get the explanation she had longed and hoped for, Helen drew a long breath and sighed as she exited the car. Popping open the trunk, Helen stepped back while Maureen grabbed her luggage. Helen stood for a moment, trying to decide whether or not to follow her mother into the airport's lobby. Helen opened up her car door, sunk into the driver's seat and cried. She drove home with tear stains on her cheeks."


• The Last Word (Write-off Challenge 7, Round 1), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "The room started shaking violently, but a quick glance out a nearby window told him that it wasn't an earthquake or any other natural phenomenon, as only his own room was affected. The lights began to flicker on and off as a low howling sound began. Accompanied by irregular thumps and odd whistling noises, it grew in volume until Jake fell back onto his bed and cowered under a pillow. It's Him, he realized in a panic. I know that temper. He's back! He's back from the grave...and he's furious with me."


• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin’s Genie (Chapter 2), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "'Relax, Stacy, we may come up with something else,' Quinn said. 'Multiple plans, and contingency plans for all of them. Definitely Daria’s territory or maybe of that tycoon guy on that cartoon about those living statues,' she thought."


• Legends Of The Metal, by TheExcellentS (part 11): "'For too long we have lived in pits, waiting for good fortune to trickle down to us. But our days of waiting are over! We will not sit here and let General Lionwhyte decide what happens next. We will gather up this mighty army and take it on the road. We will march on Lionwhyte and free every man, woman and child in that city! And then we will bring it crashing to the ground!'"


• A New Set of Rules, by Dennis (part 18): "Colleen was the prime suspect. She'd called at least three times yesterday, and probably more, but Daria had stopped looking at the caller ID after that. She had no desire to talk to Colleen anytime in the near future. Jerry or Gina were also possibilities, and she would have to be less unpleasant to them. She did not, however, expect to find Kevin waiting for at the sign-in desk."


• A Path Forged From a Lie An Interactive Daria Fic, by OverlordMikey (part 2.1): "'Never Sandi! Of course you could take care of this problem, but I feel this is a hurdle that I must jump because she's my si- Sicilian cousin's cabana girl's ex-husband's roommate's cousin twice removed who only just now learned of any relation to my family no matter how small.' Sandi said nothing in response to that. Even Quinn couldn't swallow that one."


• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (part 37): "Friday, of course, was also Halloween. Patricia had sent her an email the day before about a party being held at her dorm. It sounded like fun: they were going to have ultraviolet lamps set up in the one of the big lounges and Vaseline and Twinkies to play with. Sam had to explain the significance to her. 'The cream inside of Twinkies and Vaseline both glow under a black light. It is a very cool phenomenon.'"


• Screams of Silence, by Jim North (part 8): "This is real. I can't escape it. I know it's real. I can see the edges of twisted, torn metal clearly. I can smell the tinge of oil, gas, and other motor fluids in the air. My ears are still ringing a little from the noise. There is absolutely no reason for the car to have exploded like a balloon filled with too much air, but regardless this seems like a pretty damn realistic aftermath of just that to me."


• The Two Americas (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by Charles RB (parts 1 and 2): "The battered Ford began to near Lawndale High School, but the way in was blocked by a vast web of people. At least two hundred of all ages and walks of life, some banners, yelling with fury; TV crews and journalists all over; hunted looking Maryland National Guard soldiers in an argument with local police and some of the crowd, and behind them, almost unnoticed until you looked closer, three smartly dressed negro teenagers attempting stoic expressions." (Part 2)


• Unnamed story ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "Suddenly,a ear piercing shriek echoed across the town. It was an inhuman, almost metallic roar vaguely reminiscent of an elephant. NegaJane's eyes widened, remembering a time long ago, when she heard heard that exact same roar on Saturday afternoons, on the TV when she was younger. She looked at Judith. 'You didn't!'"


• Unnamed story (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Very well, class...I shall OPEN the BOOK!' DeMartino placed the large book - a good two feet in length - on the podium, and turned the leather covers. The hand-lettered pages were reverently turned, and DeMartino was momentarily distracted by the illustrations before finding the relevant topic."


• Unnamed story (Response to my own Iron Chief; Daria Prom), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "'Lets get some fresh air' Tom suggested. Daria smiled and took his arm, together they walked out of the gym and into the cool night air. Daria didn't pay much attention to where they were going partly because she didn't care as long as it was away from people, but mainly because her glasses were still in Tom's pocket."



• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Damn The Torpedoes!), by Ranger Thorne (COMPLETE!): "Daria (singing): Baby look at me / And tell me what you see / You ain't seen the best of me yet / Give me time I'll make you forget the rest"


• The Weight of Conscience (Write-off Challenge 7, Round 1), by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "His death wasn't your fault sis ... it was an accident. Sandi's blood though ... it's on my hands literally and figuratively. While her brain was going into overdrive, Quinn could swear that she felt another person in the room. As she watched the door slowly open, Quinn brushed a tear off her cheek."


• Welcome to The LD (Iron Chef Challenge: Straight Inta Lawndale), by angryellow (part 4): "'Don't look now Jo, but your boyfriend's here, and he's not alone.' Daria suddenly announced, pointing toward the entrance. Jodie instinctively whipped her cornrow-adorned head around and saw none other than Mack. He was accompanied by a girl named of Jennifer, who was commonly known as commonly known as 'Burnout Girl' for a certain rumor that has neither been confirmed or denied by the young lady herself."


• What If the Asteroid Never Hit? (IC: What would Lawndale be like if...), by rglovejoy (COMPLETE!): "Daria tried not to bump into too many people as she took her lunch tray to her usual table. Jane was already there, eating her bowl of fried mice. 'Hey Daria, are you sure those contacts are working? You almost knocked Andrea over.'"


• A work in progress. Subject to revision, by Chris Tucker: "Jane and I are really looking forward to graduation. No more Lawndale High for either of us. Three months of anticipation of college. Doing all that stuff you do to get ready for the big move away from family and friends. Except my best friend is coming to Boston, too! That's gonna be so good!"


• Worldburner: Dead Ringers, by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "The first Ring arrived twelve hours ago, as they do when they are unable to find a replacement Bearer when the previous one passes on. Soon, five more rings arrived, one every hour. Another word in the message burned in the same place. When the last arrived, we knew the magnitude of our error. As we replayed the final moments of the Ringbearer who perished, we saw her. And we saw the necklace she wore. A necklace that, by all accounts, should no longer exist."

It's Certainly better Than Inhuman Rights!

Today is Human Rights Day, created by the United Nations in 1948 to commemorate the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. The declaration sets out thirty articles that each define a recognized human right, including freedom from slavery, the right to peaceful assembly, and the right to education.

There's nothing to specifically relate this to Daria, although presumably Daria would be in favor of the declaration while Ms. Li would prefer to pick and choose from the articles. I just thought it was a neat holiday to share. Plus, I bet Human Rights Day is the most compassionate person on Holiday Island.

The globe on the left symbolizes both the global nature of the holiday as well as our shared right...to drink soda!

Maybe Ted's Parents Somehow Listened to the Cassette Backwards?

In a sad historical note, it was on this day in 1980 that John Lennon was assassinated. Even thirty years after his death, though, his influence is still going strong in the world.

There were only a couple of references to John Lennon and/or the Beatles in Daria episodes. First, in "Malled," Daria says, "If you play that John Lennon song backwards, it says, 'Imagine all the people, browsing in a mall.' Isn't that weird?" Second, in "The New Kid," Daria contributes to Ted DeWitt-Clinton's delinquency not just by giving him gum, but also by loaning him a Beatles cassette.

The Beatles are much better represented in fanfic. I was going to go through all the fanfic archives and find them all, but I realized three things.

1. There are actually quite a lot of them out there, and I'd probably still miss a whole bunch of good ones even if I tried.


2. It would be much more fun to open it up to everyone else.


3. I'm excruciatingly lazy.

All of these factors put together mean that I'm going to ask all of you to post about your favorite Beatles-related fanfics/fanart/other Daria stuff in the comments. Go nuts!

In the meantime, here's the fandom news update.

• The PPMB has been having frequent outages and related errors lately, but Kara Wild assures us the problem will be fixed soon, when the board moves to a new server.


• RLobinske reminds everyone to nominate their favorite Daria fanfics and fanart for the Daria Fanworks Awards.


• Deref has started a thread to discuss vintage cars.


• What anime are you into right now? vlademir1 wants to know!


• Two more Iron Chefs in the Creative Writing forum: Daria in Therapy and Papa Barksdale?


• New fan tazraven is looking for good Daria/Jane slash fics. Post if you've got a recommendation for her!

Of Trees, Concerts, and Fanfic

Today is the anniversary of the birth of the poet Alfred Joyce Kilmer, for whom Lawndale's public library (left) is named. Born in 1886, he is best known for his poem "Trees" ("I think that I shall never see / A poem lovely as a tree....").

Today is also the 55th birthday of Steven Wright, the comedian. Fans have speculated that the character of Luhrmann is based on Steven Wright because of their similar deadpan speaking styles. True or not, I bet Wright, Luhrmann, and Daria would get along fairly well.

Finally, the Altamont Free Concert took place on this day in 1969. The concert is mostly infamous for violence and deaths, thanks in part to the Hell's Angels being asked to provide security. According to "Road Worrier," Jake attended the concert. "Terrible tragedy, but I demanded my money back and I got it."

To my knowledge, the only time Jake's experience at Altamont has been touched on in any detail is in Gouka Ryuu's unnamed short scene. Lots of potential for fanfic there, though.

And speaking of which, howza about another fanfic update?

• Bohemian Catastrophe ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Looking good, Trent,' Judith purred, watching as Trent stepped out of the Tank, his guitar still slung over his shoulder. 'Why aren't you running, like all of the other people?'"


• But Now It's Time To Go ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Judith's charging up - I estimate one minute maximum!' Jamie looked to her with alarm. 'Doc Daria--'"
  


• Dictat ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Not that I or the Society are ungrateful, Ms Knight, but it does seem a bit late in the day for you to agree your... colleagues needed to be taken down.'"
  


• Eye on the Ball, by HolyGrail2007 (parts 8 and 9): "Back in his room, Finn was really angry. Mommy tried to gloss it over, but Finn knew better: She wasn’t sorry Daria made him miss his game, Daria wouldn’t get punished for it. She’d get away with it. Every time Finn did something bad, he got yelled at or punished, but Daria could yell at teachers and make everyone all sorts of miserable, and nothing ever happened to her." (Part 9)
  


• The fiercest battles lie within, by VPrad (part 28): "He was alone. The rest of the guys had gone to the respective places they would use to enter the building with hopes of not being caught. Brittany’s plan, despite being the best they could aspire to, was too risky, and it all depended on him. He couldn’t screw this up, too many lives were at stake, he knew that. 'It’s showtime.'"
  


• Genesis, by VPrad (part 2): "For a second, a wave of guilt overwhelmed her, her heartbeat accelerated, she felt again that all-too-familiar weight on her chest as she remembered the one time she attempted an inception. A single idea that had proved to be more destructive than anybody would have thought. A single concept that had torn lives to pieces."
  


• God Save The Esteem Ep13: Art of Darkness, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "There was a hesitation on the other end of the line. Finally, nervously, her grandmother said: 'Could you put Helen on please?' Again, unexpected. 'I... I want to talk to her.' Daria swallowed and handed the phone over. 'Mum? It’s... it’s for you.'" (Part 4)
  


• Holiday Roadtrip, by Chris Tucker (part 3): "'Brace yourself, Tran. You are about to meet... My Family. If you were to flee screaming into the darkness right now, no one would blame you.'"
  


• The James Lane Chronicles Chapter 4, by InvisibleDan (parts 3 and 4): "Daria slammed the brakes. The sound startled the duck and it ran off, the ducklings doing their best to follow. The SUV stopped with only a couple of feet to spare. Daria started to chuckle at herself. She said, 'Perfect.' 'What?' 'I almost killed the ugly duckling.'" (Part 4)
  


• Jane Morgendorffer, by LadieT (part 27): "Signaling for Trent to bring Quinn to the car, Helen stood in the parking lot staring her mother down. Not caring if anyone heard or saw them, the two squared off. Taking one more look at Quinn being consoled by Trent was all it took."


• Legends Of The Metal, by TheExcellentS (parts 9 and 10): "Tom hopped off the bike and looked at his surroundings. He was at another altar, not too dissimilar to the one at the top of Killmasters Mountain, but instead of metal webbing, there were 5 large stone statues, depicting women in various battle poses. Underneath these statues stood Daria, and 4 girls he had never met before. All of them, except Daria, were blue and yellow shirts and jeans." (Part 10)


• Life Beyond Highland (Iron Chef: Lawndale State), by LadieT (parts 1 and 2): "Although it wasn't her dream school Raft, Lawndale State had decent Creative Writing/Journalism program and her credits at Kilgore College would be transferable. With some hard work, she might go to Columbia for her Masters." (Part 2)


• Screams of Silence, by (parts 6 and 7): "I awake to find myself alone in the bed. I don't have to look over to determine this. I can feel it almost instinctively. I'm prepared to write it off as nerves, figuring that Quinn must have gotten up for a glass of water or to use the toilet, but there's a paranoid whisper in my ear that's telling me that I'm wrong, an edge of unease that I can't seem to shake." (Part 7)


• Unnamed story ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): "Her legs shattered Daria looked up at Judith and said, 'Why?'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Why is Jake hugging Daria?), by VPrad (COPMLETE!): "Her mother looked disturbed, she could only look at the ground and seemed afraid to look Daria at the eyes. Jake was the vivid image of fear, but not the usual neurotic, loud-screaming kind of fear, he looked fragile, vulnerable, quiet. Whatever it was that was happening definitely had to be important. She sat in the sofa next to them. '“Mom? Dad? What’s going on?' She asked worried."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chief: The Prom), by Vukodlak (part 1): "They leaned and kissed again just as Helen popped her head in the door. Before the woman could speak her eyes zeroed in on the Prom tickets in Tom's hands. She exited just as quickly. Leaning up against the wall she gasped and a slight tear came to her eye. 'My little Daria is going to prom? willingly?""


• The Vision of the Burning Cities, by jtranser: "Walking into the bar, She was confronted by the scene of Kevin, now a zombie, sobbing into his bandages after Jane made some particularly nasty cracks about him when he tried to hit on her: 'Kevin, let's face it, while you were alive, you were never anything more than a life support system for your dick. And now that's over too, even though you aren't able to realize it.'"
  


• Worldburner: When It Rains, by RLobinske (part 4): "'Nova Valdris – Gone.' The news he'd received from the commander of the battered Ringbearer fleet still echoed in is mind. He had hardly started on writing his report when the fleet arrived and requested sanctuary. Judith had struck at them and struck with ruthless efficiency."
  


• Worldhopper, by Erin M. (part 2): "The Tiffanito paused as it sent a message back to the Lawndale PD, and to the headquarters of the People for Proactive Popularism, the unspoken but recognized governing body of Lawndale, and, through its extensive political connections, the rest of the United States."
  


• Worldsaver ('Flashpoints': A Worldburner Mini-Fics Thread), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Helen put the phone down. 'Well, that's that: Rita, Amy, and my mother will be joining us for Thanksgiving this y-'"

The End of the (Ig)Noble Experiment

On this day in 1933, the Twenty-first Amendment was ratified, which repealed the Eighteenth Amendment. The result was the end of Prohibition, which is why Flapper Jodie (left) is celebrating and Old-Timey Bartender Upchuck (right) is free to offer all of the alcohol you could want.

These and other alter egos of past eras made me realize that there are actually several fanfics out there that place the Daria characters in earlier time periods, also known as retrofics. The late, great Decelaraptor, who is still very much missed in the fan community, wrote quite a few of these:

• Blimps Over Brittany!


• Daria: 1830


• Home is the Sailor


• Le Morte d'Angela


• Tales of the Missouri Cheyenne

Other retrofics include:

• High Stakes! by project pegasus


• Infamy by RLobinske


• Ms Morgendorffer's Profession by Gregor Samsa


• Pluck'd a White Rose by Dennis

Brian Taylor's Import/Export and The Angst Guy's Rocket Girls are both unfinished retrofics. Hint, hint.

Although I'm sure this list is anything but exhaustive, this appears to be relatively untouched ground. What era would you love to see used in a fanfic? What era would you love to write about in a fanfic? Get writing, people!