The Vaseline is Optional!

I'm not sure this is the traditional way to celebrate National Watermelon Day, but I guess it works. Go ahead and get yourself some watermelon today, too, but I would recommend that you just cut it open and eat it. Just my own preference, though.

Today also marks the anniversary of the episode "Write Where It Hurts," which first aired on this day in 1998. There weren't any watermelons in that one, but it did feature Jake's Kitchen Sink Stew--which might very well have watermelon in it, for all we know.

Fanfic Update!

• All's Fair ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "She spit onto the concrete, the mixture of blood and saliva standing out in sharp contrast against the cracked sidewalk. Her hands were shaking, the skin on her knuckles scraped and bloodied."


• Attack of the "Super Brain", by Captain Marbles (COMPLETE!): "Ms. Li watched in horror as her prize student wreaked havoc on the sleepy little suburb. 'There's one last hope!' she said."


• Café Talk (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: The Madness Sets In), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "At Raft University there was a small, pretentious café just off campus called the Café de Paris, and while most of the French on the menus was misspelled, for those in the know it was a place to get a cup of great coffee and really good cake."


• Consequences, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Helen Morgendorffer had a severe headache. It was because of what her son Clint had revealed to her. Besides that she was very angry."


• Expansion (Write-Off Challenge 1.2!), by baelparagon (COMPLETE!): "The last thing he saw was the goalpost falling, yellow metal careening for him as it had done during his career before his neck snapped. The pain in his neck was horrendous for but a moment before everything went black."


• Is it Curtain Yet?, by Zetor (part 6c): "The door opened behind her and she turned around to see Daria looking about as bad as she felt. Her sister walked over and dropped down onto one of the other couches."


• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin's Genie, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (Future Excerpt 3): "'I didn't wish for immortality!' Jasmine said. 'Then how have you lived until now?' Samara asked."


• Lawndale's Finest 3: The Brave and the Bold, by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): "Scarlett tried to hurry down the hallway without hurrying too much, she was about to be late but she didn't want to accidentally blow any doors off their hinges or anything." (Part 7) (Part 8)


• Real Friends, by 11tee (COMPLETE!): "Quinn walked through the hall toward her locker. As expected, Sandi, Stacey, and Tiffany were waiting. Sandi looked furious. 'So what's this I hear about you and Jamie going on another date, Quinn?'"


• Silence is Golden, by 11tee (COMPLETE!): "Silence. The woman sat on her bicycle looking down the trail. The ridgeline was to her right, a cliff-face to her left."


• Unnamed story ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by 11tee (COMPLETE!): "Bang! Nngghh? Bang! Gah, what the heck, Daria thought. Bang! Abruptly, she remembered."


• Unnamed story ('Iron Chef' for Robyn & all comers - 'The First Ten Minutes'), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "'Daria, Daria.' she heard a soft male voice quietly but insistently calling her name. Mr. O'Neill was leaning over her desk and looking down at her with concern and sympathy."


• Wheels, by 11tee (COMPLETE!): "Daria stood back with one hand under each of her sister's shoulders. Quinn tried moving her legs to help, but the atrophy pretty much hindered any real assistance."