Love Her or She'll Sue!

It's Helen's favorite holiday, Love Litigating Lawyers Day! I suppose Jake does, but I'm not sure about anyone else. I'm pretty certain no one loves Eric, though.

Fifteen years ago today, Jane and Daria made a cameo appearance in the online comic strip "The New Adventures of Bobbin." I'm a little surprised the girls were willing to own up to The Triangle, but maybe they've come to terms with the whole thing by now.

Fandom News!

• What is it? Can you help Ranma solve this mystery?


• Talk about Curt Schilling, who might be Trump 2.0.


• Discuss Arno speaking English in "Of Human Bonding."

Here's Looking at You, Kiddo

Trent and Daria are recreating a famous scene from Casablanca because today is the anniversary of actress Ingrid Bergman's birth in 1915. The only Casablanca reference I can think of from the show is when Brittany confused the movie title for the word "casanova." Anyone else know of one I'm forgetting?

Also in this day sixteen years ago, Admonisher published the essay A Rant About "Evil" Tom. In spite of the amount of time that's passed, the points are still relevant to fandom and to fanfic writing.

Fanfic Update!

• Camped Out, by Kristen Bealer (part 2): "Back at the camp, Trent was starting to wonder when they were going to have sack races or toast marshmallows. So far everyone was just standing around and talking, and no one was doing the summer camp stuff he'd been expecting."


• Clarity, by Zetor (part 8): "I blink and yawn as I check the clock on the bedside table. It reads eleven thirty. I start to panic about being late for school, then I remember I don't go to school any more."


• Close (Iron Chef: Daria and Quinn Roommates), by Zetor (COMPLETE!): "Daria lay back on her bed reading as she took advantage of the opportunity to listen to her music from her stereo rather than on her headphones. She and Quinn had made an agreement to always use headphones when they were both in the room after their competing stereos had given their father a panic attack."


• Cynic and a Six-String, by fringeperson (part 28): "'Jane? Jane!' 'Huh? Oh, sorry, that guy keeps looking at me,' Jane defended as the Spiral played their closing number for the first set – Mr Normal."


• Me And My Monkey, by Dennis (part 3): "I spent a sleepless night on the couch with bad TV droning in the background. Dave was out, so all I had for company was my whirling thoughts and Monkey, who enjoyed the attention."


• Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (part 6): "'This is torture!' Quinn lamented as she dramatically threw herself across her bed, sending several stuffed animals flying to the floor. The last thing she wanted was to be cooped up in her room, locked away from the outside world, with only her textbooks for company."


• Unnamed story (IC Runaway Daria), by Waylander (part 6): "Daria sat with the spiral notebook braced against her knees. Slowly, she read through her adaptation of Treasure Island. She wasn't satisfied with the scene of Jim Hawkins hijacking of Hispaniola."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Quinn Roommates), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "Jake Morgendorffer finished turning in the last screw and got down from the step ladder onto the deep carpet in his daughters' bedroom. He closed and opened the opaque grey room divider a couple times admiring his handiwork as it slid smoothly and nearly soundlessly along the ceiling track."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Quinn Roommates), by nightbeast37 (COMPLETE!): "Daria trudged inside the bedroom she shared with Quinn (against her will). She had just finished yet another day at hell on Earth (aka school) and needed some time to herself before her little redhead sister burst her bubble."


• Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Kuriamo22 (COMPLETE!): "Admiral Kirk stood defiantly in front of the rogue Klingon commander Kruge whom held him at gunpoint on the dying world of Genesis. Kruge had just ordered his men to be beamed to the Bird of Prey in orbit save for Spock."

Is It Chat Yet?

Don't mind Tom. He's just worried that there's going to be another live Daria-Jane chat on MTV like the one sixteen years ago today. The chat in 2000 was text only, but I can see where Tom might be nervous about the idea of webcams.

The movie Is It Fall Yet? aired on the same day, so don't expect Mr. DeMartino to be available for an online chat--he's going on a hike!

Fandom News!

• Can someone explain photosynthesis to Brother Grimace?


• Religious diversity may be making us less religious. Read the article and share your thoughts.


• Are humans among the earliest intelligent life? Discuss it in the thread.


• Kem started a new thread for her artwork in the Easel.

How's She Going to Hold Her Pom-Poms?

Brittany's sporting a new look for director Tim Burton's birthday. Burton, who directed Edward Scissorhands and many others, turns 58 today. Looking at those hands, I'd say that Kevin's going to be a little more careful about the things he says to Brittany for awhile. Or not.

Fanfic Update!

• Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 29): "Jane did her best to suppress restlessness and annoyance. Her morning runs helped to deal the physical tension, but the restriction on drawing, painting and sculpting was slowly driving the young artist crazy."


• Camped Out, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "Daria stared gloomily out the window of the Tank as Trent drove them to the last place she ever wanted to return to. Okay, that wasn't quite true. Camp Grizzly beat Highland in terms of horrible places to spend one's childhood, but not by all that much."


• Clarity, by Zetor (parts 6 and 7): "This was a mistake. I feel sick. My head is killing me and I think I might throw up, but that's not the worst of it. I feel empty." (Part 7)


• The Date, by elainefr (part 2): "First crush? First love? That can't be right...I would have known...Wouldn't I?"


• Eumenide, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "–I need my beauty sleep. Goodnight, Daria. –'night, Quinn. Somehow, Daria doubted that the night would be good."


• Me And My Monkey, by Dennis (part 2): "Dave must have seen something in my face, though, because his first words on my arrival home were, 'Way to go, dude.' 'Yes,' I said. 'I successfully got coffee.'"


• Sonoma Coma, by jtranser (part 23): "'You realize that I will require extra satisfaction for doing this, of course.' 'Naturally. Ordinary satisfaction just will not do. Don't worry, Upchuck, I have several specially bred maggots for just such an emergency.'"


• Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (parts 4 and 5): "It was going on 2:00 AM and Helen Morgendorffer was deep in the midst of a caffeine induced panic. Scattered about the kitchen table were countless number of legal briefs, their folders long since discarded as she made a frantic search for her newest casework." (Part 5)

"Gee, Quinn, if you're so smart maybe--AUGHHHHH!"

Sandi's celebrating Ride the Wind Day, but it doesn't look like it was by choice. I have a sneaking suspicion new Fashion Club President Quinn's feeling very smug right now. I wonder if Sandi's going to follow in Roger's footsteps and land on a cow.

Fandom News!

• Do you think Millennials ruined the Olympics? Share your thoughts.


• What do you think of the Pharma CEO who said they're in business of shareholder profit.


• Discuss Jill Stein as a presidential candidate.


• Vukodlak posted a new Iron Chef in Creative Writing: Daria and Quinn Roommates.


• Vote in tafka's poll about Big Brother Lawndale.

It's a Good Day for Old People and Lawyers

Brittany's reading with seniors again for Senior Citizen's Day, and I bet she hasn't forgotten her own advice about wearing sunscreen. Daria may or may not be visiting Mrs. Blaine today, depending on whether or not she's written a new Melody Powers installment.

This also marks the anniversary of the founding of the American Bar Association in 1878, and I'm sure Helen would be observing this important day if she wasn't so busy at work. She'll probably have a few minutes free next week to celebrate, though! Maybe!

Fanfic Update!

• Clarity, by Zetor (parts 4 and 5): "Saturday mornings aren't much different than weekdays, except Father is at the table reading the paper. I go through the routine. Pills under the tongue, take a drink, and spit them out when no one's looking." (Part 5)


• Cynic and a Six-String, by fringeperson (part 27): "Freemont was deader than Lawndale, and a hundred miles of road-trip to the gig only served to further splinter, disrupt, and fracture relations between Max the drummer and Nick the bassist."


• Daria: High School Reunion, by Serrallonga (part 5a): "DARIA: (reading) “The First Terrace”... (to herself) gee, this place seems familiar to m... (She stops talking as she notices her reflection at the glass window, realizing she's wearing a white and blue cheerleader outfit. She rolls her eyes with a boring expression. A hard rain starts to fall)"


• It's a Wonderful List, by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "Mr. O'Neill wound down the teen self-esteem class with the confidence of a teacher with only a couple minutes left in his session, 'And so, for tomorrow, I want you to make a list of ten ways the world would be a sadder place if you weren't in it.'"


• Me And My Monkey, by Dennis (part 1): "My name is Tom Sloane and I was twenty-one years old the first time I made love to another man."


• Snippets of Modern Times for the Lawndale Set... (Scenes that should be: Pacific Rimmers), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "In the 'secure' building that was Lawndale High, Daria and Jane were at Daria's locker, the pair ignored one of the myriad security cameras that suddenly fell from the ceiling and shattered on the ground."


• Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (part 3): "The sun was just starting to dip below the horizon by the time that Jesse Moreno made it to Casa Lane. He easily locked the doors on his rusting van, even though he knew that the chances of it being stolen were slim to none, before heading inside."


• Stolen and Forced Paths: 1986: November, by macross (part 3): "'Just Another day. It's just like the last one. Here I am back in mother's kitchen pouring something that isn't cream in my coffee.' Rita thought as she nearly overfilled the little red and pink Meissen tea cup with cognac."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Quinn Roommates), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "The two young women stopped by the entrance of a large appartment building. Jane looked at it with interest."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Quinn Roommates), by Serrallonga (COMPLETE!): "(At the Morgendorffer house) (DARIA goes downstairs. JAKE has just hung up the phone) DARIA: Bye dad, I'm going to Jane's."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef : MMORPG, Lawndale style), by Waylander (part 18): "When Darlene decided to find another artist to talk to, she learned it's easier said than done. She methodically searched the tents, only to find them empty."

Spuds in Space!

Daria's enjoying a break from frozen lasagna in honor of National Potato Day. I'm thinking maybe over-processed pasta cubes don't sound quite so bad anymore, do they?

Today is also the anniversary of Gene Roddenberry's birth in 1921, and as there are quite a few Star Trek fans in Daria fandom I think it's worth mentioning. Aside from echopapa's Memory Lane, I can't think of any crossover fics off the top of my head. Can you? Bonus points if they feature potatoes!

Fandom News!

• Visit the 2016 U.S. Presidential Campaign Decompression Thread for a break from politics.


• Share your funny stories about what went in the toilet besides the blatantly obvious.


• Join in the game I'm Going to My Third Picnic, and I'm Bringing....


• Shiva posted a new Deadliest Warrior thread: Superman vs. a Warhammer 40k Space Marine.


• tafka has started a thread for her artwork in The Easel.

Some Books Are More Equal Than Others

Young Daria's all set to celebrate the anniversary of Animal Farm, which was first published on this day in 1945. That's assuming that Helen doesn't snatch it away, and Skip leaves her alone long enough to read it, and Amelia stops talking so she can focus on the book. I'm afraid it's not really looking too good, Daria.

Fanfic Update!

• Meant to Find You, by PrecambrianStudios (part 3a): "Three pages into an essay on 'Pride and Prejudice and Zombies,' Shona received a call, her phone ringing to the theme from Doctor Who. She flipped it open. 'Yyyello?' she said cheerfully into it."


• One And The Same, by Princess_Pasta (part 6): "The low sound of Earth, Wind, and Fire filtered over the radio as the Lexus sped down the highway, the early morning drive free of traffic or congestion. It was much too early to be awake let alone dressed and on the road, at least in Daria's opinion, but she didn't have a say in the matter."


• Possibilities, by Sureia (part 32): "It wasn't often that clients had him feeling nervous before an introduction, but this was a fairly unique situation, and he was honestly curious about it. Straightening his clothes, Jake took a calming breath,checked his watch one last time, and opened the doors, smiling politely."

Relaxing and Music Do Go Hand in Hand!

Helen and Jake are taking a rare opportunity to kick back for Relaxation Day, but I wouldn't count on it lasting more than a few minutes. If it's not Helen's phone ringing, it'll be Jake going into a Mad Dog-related rant.

Meanwhile, Daria and Jane might be on their way to Alternapalooza, which apparently began on this day in 1997. Portable toilets and sitting on the ground...it doesn't get any better than that!

Fandom News!

• DocForbin is looking for help from someone with computer expertise


• Derek is going to visit San Francisco. Can you meet up with him?


• Whom do you consider to be the living news legends of our times?


• Make your choice in two new Deadliest Warrior discussions: Tamaranian Princess Vs Dathomirian Sith and Mister Spock vs. Darth Vader.


• Vote in BloodyWilliam's poll on what to draw next.

Does She Even Know Which is Which?

Brittany's still trying to figure out whether or not she should be participating in Left Hander's Day, and I think it might take her awhile. If you're a leftie, then enjoy your holiday! I'm sure it completely makes up for the smudged ink and ill-fitting scissors you have to deal with.

Fanfic Update!

• Bear Spray, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Yeah, I was up there – Silverton Island. They only allow a hundred people to come up every year – yes, you need the coin to get the permit, and my father knows people in the Canadian Government. He's known Justin since they were kids, so it wasn't a problem.'"


• Crowd Control, by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Sandi pulled her yellow Mitsubishi convertible into the back of the club. There was nowhere to park, though. The lot was full up."


• Cynic and a Six-String, by fringeperson (part 26): "'So, you're going to be dating my brother,' Jane said happily. 'And having Jesse for a model finally cured you of that crush,' Daria countered with a smirk."


• Daria: High School Reunion, by Serrallonga (part 4c): "WONG: (singing along) Hey, I just met you- and this is cra-zy, but here's my number-so call me maybe... DARIA: (raising her voice) EXCUSE ME, Mr... (reading the driver ID card) WONG?"


• Lost & Found, by elainefr (COMPLETE!): "'Hey.' 'Hey.' 'Jane's not here.' They looked at each other until she felt compelled to look away. He started to shut the door, but stopped when she spoke."


• Two Under Par, by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'Look out!' Jake looked up at the shout, but it was too late--pain exploded against his forehead and he staggered to the ground with a groan. The throbbing was so intense, he could barely even see."

Why Did the President Cross the Road?

Kevin is amused by Presidential Joke Day, and I can't think of a bigger joke than Kevin as George Washington. Just like in Mrs. Stoller's story, though, he's not very focused.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Just Add Water," which first aired on this day in 1999. It may have been a so-so episode, but some of those Sick, Sad World bits during the marathon were pretty funny.

Fandom News!

• Read about and discuss the feud between the WSJ editor and Sean Hannity.


• Ranma has a question about the episode "Malled."


• Share your opinion on the various Scooby-Doo reboots.


• See the list of completed 2016 Daria fanfics.

Did You Know He Was Jane Fonda's Father in Real Life, Too?

Daria would like a bit of peace and quiet so she can enjoy Book Lover's Day, but she isn't likely to get it. She might have better luck if she read Walden, which was published on this day in 1854. Or, rather, she might have better luck if she goes to Walden and enjoys the isolation. I'm sure something would end up ruining it for her, though. Either Quinn would find her or she'd find out no one will deliver pizza to the wilderness. It's always something, isn't it?

Fanfic Update!

• La La La La La, by GrrHatLet (COMPLETE!): "It had been such a quiet evening. 'BUT MO-OM!' 'Had' being the optimum word."

They Must Really Have Bonded Over "Gone With the Wind"!

Daria and Quinn are sharing a tender moment on Sisters Day, and their relationship is so close and loving that the only image of them hugging comes from a fantasy sequence. I wonder if Quinn prefers to celebrate Cousins Day instead.

Fandom News!

• Read and comment on an article about the political process.


• The Sidhe points out a major media fail.


• Talk about the Rio Olympic Games in a new thread.

Ninety-Nine Bottles of Celebration!

Brittany's ready to help everyone celebrate International Beer Day, although she's not sure if it's Beer Day around the world or a day to celebrate imported as well as domestic beers. Kevin, I'm sure, doesn't care and will simply observe the holiday until he can't see straight.

Fanfic Update!

• Cynic and a Six-String, by fringeperson (part 25): "'Mr Morgendorffer, do you have a tarp, or a couple of old newspapers, that I could borrow?' Jane asked. 'Uh, sure, but... what for?'"


• Daria: High School Reunion, by Serrallonga (part 4a and 4b): "MELODY gets out of the car, followed by two police agents. They only exchange a quick look: there's no need to talk, they all know the score and are ready for it. MEL nods and the agents start walking to the entrance." (Part 4b)


• One And The Same, by Princess_Pasta (part 5): "Monday rolled around and with it the news of Brittany and Kevin's explosive break-up. Daria stayed out of the rumor mill but that didn't stop her from listening with amusement as her classmates exaggerated the events of the party."


• The Phantom of the Library, by neonhomer (part 8): "'You've really done it now.' said Chris to Matt as they walked into the courtyard of Lawndale High. 'Why do you say that?' 'I saw Abby this morning.'"


• Stolen and Forced Paths: 1986: November, by macross (part 2): "'She's a strong little lady isn't she?' A kind voice startled Jake from his pained thoughts. Looking up from the incubator where his daughter slept hooked up to a respirator in the NICU, he was greeted by a warm smile from the charge nurse."


• Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Sureia (COMPLETE!): "'Okay guys, I know there's been a lot of rumours goin' around. A lot of confusion. Wonderin' if you guys have any questions for me?'"

The Grease is Optional

Billy, Bobby, and Benjy have the right idea for National Watermelon Day, although I'm not sure the vaseline is strictly necessary. To each his own, I guess. The rest of us can probably settle for eating ours, though.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Write Where It Hurts," which first aired on this day in 1998. You'd think watching a character struggle with writer's block would be boring, but all of the random fantasy sequences and funny references made that one a fan favorite.

Fandom News!

• Talk about Australia's shifting and other #21st century problems.

Two Mentions in the Media? That Makes it Multimedia!

Daria's reading up on herself because fifteen years ago today, Daria was mentioned twice as part of MTV's twentieth anniversary. That makes MTV 35 now, which is much too old for their primary demographic. Tsk, tsk.

Fanfic Update!

• The Bench, by dmsfanman (COMPLETE!): "Daria went inside and closed the door. When she turned around Quinn was standing right in front of her. 'Eeep,' Daria said. She thought, 'That was certainly a profound statement.'"


• Cynic and a Six-String, by fringeperson (part 24): "It seemed that the school insisted on forcing career aptitude tests on the entire student population on an annual basis. Even the kids that had jobs – or even only kind of had jobs – had to fill out the forms."


• Daria Ravenclaw: No Country For Unpleasant Old Men, by Meester_Lee (part 1): "It was time to see the girl, thought Arcturus Black. He'd buried more old friends in the last couple of years, and even factoring in his admittedly-weak powers of divination, he wasn't that sure as to just how long his remaining health and vigor would last."


• Great Professor Dario Ch.2, by ST91 (part 1): "'Please, Ms. Lane, come this way.' said Helen before climbing the stairs. 'Yes Mrs. Morgendorffer. By the way you can call me Penny.'"


• The Many Doctors - Chapter 35, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "The TARDIS materialised. The Doctor, Rose and Felica stepped out. Rose turned around. 'Adam? Out you come.'"


• The Mighty Fall (Pasta's Never-ending Ideas Thread!), by Princess_Pasta (COMPLETE!): "The auditorium was packed, everyone from freshmen to seniors seated inside, and yet one could've heard a pin drop. The air was heavy, the mood tense, and Jane Lane suspected it would've been better suited for a funeral."


• Required Secondary Abilities, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Well, this makes it official,' Daria Morgendorffer quipped, looking down from the enclosed balcony to what – to her eyes – reminded her of a massive football field, but with no goal posts and the yard markers labeled by multiples of five instead of ten, and going up to 150."


• The start of something.... strange (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: 600 Years Afterward), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "It was the first day of senior year, the big final year, one more round of torture before they graduated and either went to college or headed off into 'the real world'. Jane still wasn't sure what that meant."


• Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "Quinn, who was tight as a drum, burst out laughing and shouted: 'Here come the Franzosen to the rescue: Ourrah pobieda!'"