She's Looking Very...SHARP!

Brittany has traded in her pom poms for shears in order to celebrate the anniversary of the movie Edward Scissorhands, which was released on this day in 1990. I think she's even more unhappy about the loss of her cheerleader uniform, though, because black is hardly a cheerful color. Still, if anyone can keep her bouncity-bounce under these circumstances, she can.

I hope she doesn't try to send any long distance messages for Letter Writing Day, though. Not only will it be nearly impossible for her to hold a pencil now, but I'm sure her spelling and grammar are just awful.

There's also no way she's going to be able to celebrate International Civil Aviation Day by flying anywhere, because can you imagine trying to pass through a metal detector like that? Lucky for Jake and Daria on their next flight; it will be free of any squeaky voices...except for Jake's when they hit turbulence.

Fanfic Update!

• Mysteries of Aurora, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 5): "'Welcome to Introduction to Nordic History of Aurora, where you'll learn that the period is much more complex than just "Vikings take over most of Aurora and then the Unification happens." I'm Professor Erik Brynjarsson.'"


• OverhydraTed (The Ted Zone), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "'Good morning, Ted.' Ted looked up from his locker to see Jodie standing next to him, looking a little wary."


• Spider Quinn 13 Aftermath and Investigations, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "'Ah!' Daria called out as she reached the ground a little quickly. 'Sorry,' the Enigma said. 'I’m still getting used to this.'"

Good Luck Waving Your Pom-Poms Now!

Poor Brittany doesn't look very enthusiastic about portraying the title character of Edward Scissorhands, which premiered on this day in 1990. Can you blame her, though? The next time she twirls a lock of hair around her finger, she'll probably give herself an unwanted haircut...or worse.

Not only that, but she's going to have to pass up Letter Writing Day as well. Not that she ever did much writing in the first place. Daria, on the other hand, sent and received a handful of letters throughout the series. In fact, she even (briefly) broke up with Tom by letter, which is kind of a jerk move if you ask me.

Fandom News!

• R.I.P., Norman Lear.

She'll Never Hold a Pompom Again

Brittany looks awfully troubled about the anniversary of the movie Edward Scissorhands, which was released on this day in 1990. I suspect she's regretting her decision to let Dr. Shar make a few "little adjustments," especially now that she'll be risking her own life whenever she tries to twirl her hair around her finger.

Today is also Letter Writing Day, another activity that Brittany will find challenging. Not because of the scissor hands, but because of her complete illiteracy.

Fanfic Update!

• The Background Blues, by welltemperedclavier (parts 9 - 12): "The steady clack-clack-clack of a dozen pairs of hands typing on keyboards filled the AV Club room as Victor and Priscilla waited there for the rest of the plotters." (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12)


• Crossover Lounge (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Closing Walls of Schloss Morgendorffer and Casa Lane), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "In the Green Room of Eternity, where the casts of various fictional shows and written works live in between sets is a series of lounge rooms."


• A Daria and Quinn Christmas, by WildDogJJ (parts 4 and 5): "Since it's Sunday morning, Jim (like the Italian-American he is) was in the kitchen making the gravy (meat heavy tomato sauce) for dinner. He'd just finished slicing the sausages he'd fried when Jake came in." (Part 5)


• This Limbo I'm In, by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 2): "Lawndale was a suburb, which meant that it’s 'cultural district' wasn’t so much a spontaneous creation as it was a fenced in zoo; a place where the 'respectable types' figured you could safely put a tattoo parlour without your property values taking a dive from a twenty-story window."

Brittany Ditzyhands

Brittany looks a bit distressed about celebrating the anniversary of the movie Edward Scissorhands, which premiered on this day in 1990. Then again, she might just be worried about how she's going to hold her pom poms. Hard to say with that one.

Fanfic Update!

• Double (or Triple) Trouble (Daria and the Gang Thread II), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane walked home from school. It was time for Jane to spring her surprise on Daria. 'So, Daria...I want to let you know that I have tickets to the new Front Bottoms concert. Wanna come along?'"


• Fates Entwined, by Deep Metal (part 24): "'We're almost there,' Daria pointed out. 'Should be about six more hours before we reach Lawndale. I recognize this part of Ohio.'"


• Late Postal Delivery (My Annual Thanksgiving Fanfic Release - 2018!), by Brother Grimace (part 4): "Things became even more chilly a day before Halloween… when Sandi came by, the morning before the big costume ball. She had called the day before, to make certain the family (and the security detail) knew that she was on her way."


• Pimpin' Ain't Easy (But It Sure Does Suck) (Life After Thirty), by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "Jim and Quinn are seated at the kitchen table while a beautiful young brunette sits across from them. She's hoping to be hired as their new assistant." (Part 2)


• The Promposal (Are there any Brittany and Daria shipper fanfics?), by EntrancedCat (COMPLETE!): "As soon as she and Jane sat down at the lunch table, Daria took a suck off the paper straw stuck in her carton of chocolate milk. She very nearly spat it in Jane's face as Brittany and the entire Lawndale Lion football cheer squad popped up in front of their table."


• Second Chance for Love, by David Falkayn (part 31): "'Happy Birthday to you...Happy Birthday to you...Happy Birthday Elizaveta...' 'Blow out the candles, kiddo!' Jake grinned as Helen brought in a chocolate layer cake with seventeen candles."


• Superiors, by ST91 (part 21): "Anthony braked abruptly when he found himself facing a SUV's carcass. What the hell!? He thought."


• Thank U, by Lady Evil (part 26): "'Hands inside the window, Danny.' said Jesse as they drove to the airport. 'But look!' said Danny, letting his hand drift on the speeding air current. 'My hand can fly!' 'It'll go flying if a truck hits it!' Jane reminded him."


• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria fanfic should have: The Saga Goes On), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Daria: 'Well, they're going to nuke the porn from Tumblr.' Jane: 'RIP Tumblr.'"


• Winter Is Coming, by Meester_Lee (parts 3 - 6): "They didn't move into a house immediately. Neither Breeze nor Ben had scouted out the town beforehand to search for housing. They had planned to stay in a cheap hotel in town while they looked." (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)

"Don't pick your nose...don't pick your nose...."

On this day in 1990, the movie Edward Scissorhands had its limited release. Brittany doesn't look very happy in her alter ego as the title character, and not just because she's going to have a hard time holding her pom-poms. The next time she tries to twirl a strand of hair around her finger, she'll risk cutting off her head...or something vital! Now that I think about it, I have a feeling Kevin isn't too thrilled about this idea, either.

Fanfic Update!

• Christmas, by dmsfanman (part 5): "Three days later Daria was on the phone with Tom. He asked, 'Do you think you can get someone to take me to the train station? My mother hasn't spoken to me since New Year's Eve. Not that I mind it so much, but if no one is going to talk to me I might as well go back to Newtowne tomorrow. Are you interested in coming to Newtowne for a few days with me?'"


• Daria Ravenclaw: No Country For Unpleasant Old Men, by Meester_Lee (parts 3a and 3b): "Arcturus and Iago quickly retrieved their luggage from MACUSA's customs service. Despite the fuss that MACUSA's immigration agents had made about Arcturus' wand, MACUSA had given his luggage only perfunctory attention." (Part 3b)


• Daria, the Radio serial, by Roentgen (parts 3 and 4): "(Sounds of silverware clanking against dishes.) HELEN: Daria, it's your turn to clean up after dinner. DARIA: Why do I have to clean up? HELEN: You know that you girls have to chip in. We don't have a maid here, unlike some people." (Part 4)


• For the Hoard!, by tafka (COMPLETE!): "Trent looked at his stuff. The room was full of it, packed to the ceiling in unending drifts of detritus. He had an urge to pull out his axe and practice, but he'd long-since forgotten where his amp was."


• The Life of the Mind, by Two-Eyed Charlie (part 2): "The cops in Lawndale are lackadaisical at the best of times. One A.M is far from 'best' by practically every metric."


• Misery Machine, by NightGoblyn (part 16): "'Alright,' Ms. Barch said. 'It looks like I was half right. They left their flag mostly unguarded, but it was a pair of inferior males that got left behind. Since they've probably already exceeded their attention span, this should be easy.'"


• Moonstruck, by NightGoblyn (part 7): "That afternoon, she found herself wasting time in O'Neill's after school self-esteem class, again. She was ignoring the teacher, and much of the class, and sketching out one last star chart on a pad of legal paper."

How's She Going to Hold Her Pom-Poms?

Brittany's sporting a new look for director Tim Burton's birthday. Burton, who directed Edward Scissorhands and many others, turns 58 today. Looking at those hands, I'd say that Kevin's going to be a little more careful about the things he says to Brittany for awhile. Or not.

Fanfic Update!

• Black Cloaks of Lawndale, by Waylander (part 29): "Jane did her best to suppress restlessness and annoyance. Her morning runs helped to deal the physical tension, but the restriction on drawing, painting and sculpting was slowly driving the young artist crazy."


• Camped Out, by Kristen Bealer (part 1): "Daria stared gloomily out the window of the Tank as Trent drove them to the last place she ever wanted to return to. Okay, that wasn't quite true. Camp Grizzly beat Highland in terms of horrible places to spend one's childhood, but not by all that much."


• Clarity, by Zetor (parts 6 and 7): "This was a mistake. I feel sick. My head is killing me and I think I might throw up, but that's not the worst of it. I feel empty." (Part 7)


• The Date, by elainefr (part 2): "First crush? First love? That can't be right...I would have known...Wouldn't I?"


• Eumenide, by Rémi (COMPLETE!): "–I need my beauty sleep. Goodnight, Daria. –'night, Quinn. Somehow, Daria doubted that the night would be good."


• Me And My Monkey, by Dennis (part 2): "Dave must have seen something in my face, though, because his first words on my arrival home were, 'Way to go, dude.' 'Yes,' I said. 'I successfully got coffee.'"


• Sonoma Coma, by jtranser (part 23): "'You realize that I will require extra satisfaction for doing this, of course.' 'Naturally. Ordinary satisfaction just will not do. Don't worry, Upchuck, I have several specially bred maggots for just such an emergency.'"


• Standstill, by Princess_Pasta (parts 4 and 5): "It was going on 2:00 AM and Helen Morgendorffer was deep in the midst of a caffeine induced panic. Scattered about the kitchen table were countless number of legal briefs, their folders long since discarded as she made a frantic search for her newest casework." (Part 5)

Note to Brittany: Do NOT Pick Your Nose!

A very happy and/or creepy (his choice) birthday to director Tim Burton, born on this day in 1958. Among Burton's best-known films are Beetlejuice, The Nightmare Before Christmas, and Edward Scissorhands. Brittany's alter ego on the right is the title character of that last one, although I can't imagine how she plans to hold her pom poms now. At least Kevin may think twice before cheating on her ever again, but on the other hand, it's Kevin--I seriously doubt he ever even thinks once about anything.

Fandom News!

• People are sharing news and personal experiences about the earthquake on the east coast of the U.S.


• Daria Cast: Where Are They Now? Share pictures you've found of Daria lookalikes!


• TonyOrk is asking permission to use fanart in his slideshow.


• If you can make one of the Euro Dariacon dates, then vote in the poll!


• midnightstorm wonders what Tom's passion would be.


• Who would win in a Skeletor vs. Mumm-Ra fight? Vote in the poll!


• Watch and discuss the fan film Portal: No Escape in the thread.


• Stripey asks if anyone is up for a Daria Fanworks Day on Friday the 26th.


• OverlordMikey posted a poll to decide which fanfic he should continue.


• Post about supercharacters in Daria, including time travelers and teleporters!


• Lots of new Iron Chefs in Creative Writing: Roentgen's Daria Dating Service, RX-87's Welcome to the Sick Sad World, Pashupati's Exchange of Interests, Pumpkin Panic's Pleasantville, and Mr.Viking's Tom cheats on Daria.

Who Wants to Be a Scissorshands?

Our birthday alter egos today are for Regis Philbin (played by Tom Sloane), who was the host of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?, and director Tim Burton, who did Edward Scissorhands (played by Brittany Taylor). Mr. Philbin is 79, and Mr. Burton is 52. Yo!

One of the Iron Chefs at PPMB has created a large number of ficlets. These are not yet listed below but eventually will be. Stay tooned.

NEWZ!

• GetRealDenver.com offers an excellent interview with two of the key voice actors in the Daria series. See: "'Daria' speaks: Voices of cult MTV cartoon talk about first-ever DVD release."
• RLobinske presents a new Iron Chef: Zak Lane, based on a child's picture. Check it out.

PPMB

• NEW! Big Esteem, by Hazazel (Parts 1 and 2): “Girls, I just want you to know your mothers and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new town and state.” said the driver, Jake Morgendorffer. “Especially for you, Daria, right? ,” he said to girl sitting on the back seat. “Did we move,” answered the girl who had big round eyeglasses, a green jacket, under which one could see her orange shirt, and a knee length black skirt. Jake laughed nervously to his daughter’s joke and was about to say something when the other girl sitting in the back interrupted him. “Speaking of moms, dad, why couldn’t Helen take us to school? She took Sam and Chris to their school” “Helen’s starting in her new job today, Sandi” Jake answered. “She’s going to pass by the elementary school anyway, so it’s easy for her to drop them off.” (NEW! Part 2)

• NEW! Big Esteem IICY, by Hazazel (COMPLETE!): "This college waiting game sucks, although it does provide the unexpected benefit of taking my mind off of every other aspect of my life." "I know the feeling. Well, I did know the feeling. Or, at least, kind of knew the feeling." "Wait, you heard from BFAC?" "Um, no..."
  
• Daria/Dorian 7: Motorcycles and Jocks Don't Mix, by LadieT (Part 4): Jane was trying to focus on the canvas in front of her. Every few seconds, she would turn and watch Dorian read. The conversation between her and Brittany ran through her head. Feeling her anger rise, Jane threw her paintbrush against the wall. Closing the playbook, Dorian walked over to Jane. As he approached, Jane pushed him away. Walking past Dorian, Jane picked up the brush, cleaned it, then resumed her painting. Confusion covering his face, Dorian sighed and went back to reading. "You look cute when you run," Jane said, refusing to look his way. Dorian responded hesitantly, "I'm glad you think so." "Oh... I didn't say that. Brittany did while you were doing speed drills during practice."
  

• Daria in Big Jane, Episode 13: Stop Pestering Me, Dammit! by InvisibleDan (COMPLETE!): "Who are you talking to?" Daria looked over and saw R. Thomas Sloane wearing a french maid's uniform and holding a feather duster. "Nobody. Why the hell are you dressed like that?" "You didn't give me anything else to wear when I'm performing my duties." "Oh yeah. Sorry about that." "I told you I would pay you back for protecting me but I didn't know you would be so kinky." "Hey, if you want something else to wear, take it up with Trent." "I would except I can't wake him up." (Daria/The Big O)
  
• Kolchak: The Lawndale File, by Chris Tucker (continued): Morning couldn't come soon enough for me. One of the side effects of the past 20 plus years of my career has been nightmares. Oddly, I'd grown so used to them that I just kept on sleeping, no matter how terrifying they were. For whatever reason, my battered psyche decided that it was just easier to continue sleeping than to wake up and then try to get back to sleep. As for me, I'd prefer to wake up in a cold sweat and be awake to see the dawn.

• A Scene No Daria Fanfic Should Have, by Getrealordie187 (COMPLETE!): "I now pronounce you Mr. and Mrs. Morris." "Time out." (Daria/Saved by the Bell)
• Unnamed story (Future Daria: Iron Chef or merely an annoyance?), by Kristen Bealer (COMPLETE!): "Daria! Quinn! The Yeagers are here!" The girls came down the stairs and walked outside to see a hybrid car pull into the driveway. Some decades-old song by Lady Gaga could be heard blaring through the open windows as the visitors stepped out of the car to greet the Morgendorffers.
• NEW! Unnamed story (Future Daria: Iron Chef or merely an annoyance?), by Wormbait (COMPLETE!): [Too short to sample!]
  
• Unnamed story (God Save the Esteem 3: Family Devalued), by Charles RB (Part 2): On the way out on Friday, Quinn was corralled by her parents. “Quinn, Erin’s going to be coming into town after school lets out. It’d be very helpful to us if you met her in town and showed her around.” “And remember, your cousin didn’t have the same advantages you and Daria did: loud music, rocking out, and partying are going to scare her. Bear that in mind.” “I will,” said Quinn, looking utterly angelic and trustworthy.

• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: 4chan Episodes (THREAD IZ COMPLET!!1!!!)), by Project Pegasus (COMPLETE!): "So I've made up my mind." "And?" "I'm accepting Raft's offer of admission." "You can't do that." "Why not?"
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: What he REALLY thinks of Daria!), by Getrealordie187 (COMPLETE!): Angier Sloane watched his oldest son take his girlfriend upstairs, the packet of neat and precise calculations left in his hands after only a day away from his side. The girl wasn't just a literary up and comer; she was a mathematical savant.
• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Ouch Time), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "Well, I think I know where this is going." "Oh, witty to the last, are we? Well, laugh out of this—once you're mutilated and dying, this entire universe will burn, at my hand. Everyone you ever knew and loved, screaming—and you'll have to listen before death claims you. It's what you deserve." "Big words. But there's one thing you didn't take into account..." (Daria/Drawn Together/Power Rangers, + Judith Strikes!)
• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Ouch Time), by Getrealordie187 (COMPLETE!): Her jaw twitches as she controls the urge to cry. "It's so beautiful." (Daria/The O.C.)

• What the Dormouse Said, by TAG (COMPLETE!): He saw her as soon as he opened the office door. She slouched in a chair to his left between the office’s front desk and a potted artificial tree. A color picture of President Richard Nixon hung on the wall above her head. The moment she spotted him she got to her feet—and began chewing a wad of gum she had been hiding in her mouth. “Hey, kid,” he said. “Hey,” she said in relief. “Thanks, Uncle Jack.”
  
• Yeah, by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "Hey Jodie, Mack." "Hey Daria." Jodie replied. Mack just stood there with a smile on his face. "I was wondering what you we're doing this weekend." "Well if all goes right I'm headed to the moon all weekend." She said as Kevin and Brittany came up from behind. "So I take it your going to participate in the ‘Camp out under the Stars' fundraiser." "Only if NASA refuses to led me aboard the shuttle."
  

(snip!)

Nineteen years ago today, the urban fantasy movie Edward Scissorhands was released in the USA. Brittany appears as Scissorhands in this remarkable alter ego from early in the Daria series. Click on the image to get the full-size view. (Thank you, Pinhead!) Loved that movie, sad and sweet all at once. It turned the Frankenstein theme on its head. Brittany's expression in the alter ego is perhaps the most amazing thing about it. Perfect, exactly like the movie.

nU0oZ!

It is time to thank those who have contributed so much to DariaWiki of late. Richard Lobinske, Brother Grimace, Doggieboy, Roentgen, Disco316, Jim North, Boandpop, and JPAGC have offered outstanding work and greatly expanded one of the core websites in this fandom. Yay! Visit the link above to see their works. U d0oDz r0oOL!!!

Two active & worthwhile non-PPMB threads to follow (and contribute to) have appeared. They are:

• Television Without Pity: Daria
• Facebook: Daria

Go, sign up, start typing, and enjoy.

Now for a few weird (but fun) things found on the Internet. First, Daria M. and Daria W., a bedroom comparison.

Next, something that might have been posted here before, but I don't recall it: 20 Classy High School Outcasts on Entertainment Weekly (ew.com). We are interested in #5.

Here is an extremely odd blog (the pot calls the kettle black) about every single thing in the universe with the name of Daria: Daria Derly Fun. Some screen captures I haven't seen before, too. Nice. Weird, but that's okay.

Someone has posted an avatar of Daria Morgendorffer from Second Life at the Facebook site. Nice!

The Daria/Harry Potter crossover issue has again arisen. Check it out. Interesting issue.

PPMB

• Finn Morgendorffer 19: It's Edgy, Dammit, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 1): “If only we could understand the wonders of the male brain,” said Jane. “Easy," said Daria. "Every other word is breasts."
• Inner Universe, by Malakite (Part 1): The next day, Jane happened past a boy having locker trouble. As she walked by she said "Do you hear that? He hasn't got a prayer!" The boy glanced at her for a second, and then went back to trying to open his locker after her suddenly sympathetic, "Oh, bummer."
• Reaped Out 2: Sickle Sad World, by Shnookies, the artist formerly known as Pinkminx (COMPLETE!): Daria glanced at the growing crowd of onlookers and tapped her foot impatiently. She didn’t see Jane approaching her from behind. “YOU!!!” Jane growled.
• Reflections, by MidnightStorm (continued): Pizza Prince was crowded as usual as Daria slowly walked in. Workers, on lunch break, looked at her with curiosity and shrugged. Going back to their usual drawls on business and such, not caring about the lone teenager. Her usual booth with Jane was taken by two young workers arguing about some money loans. Finding an empty booth all the way at the end of the row, she sat down and gazed at the shiny metal table.
• The Secret Life of Tammy Sloane, by MidnightStorm (Part 1): It was a quiet day in the Sloane household, something that was very rare and unusual. Mrs. Sloane, better known as Kay, was pleased at the energy in the house. Most of the time it was chaotic due to their eldest daughter's actions. She had scolded her hundreds of times, most of which were for pulling pranks on her teachers or humiliating a student.
• Unnamed story (Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): When Jack Jeebs saw the woman in a black suit and round, dark glasses enter his pawn shop, his stomach tightened. "Good morning, Dee. How's it going?" he asked, hoping for the best. Agent Dee said, "Don't good morning me, Jeebs. I'm not in a good mood."
  
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: "And Then Buffy Staked Edward."), by MidnightStorm (COMPLETE!): Edward looked around. The streets were deserted, something very unusual about the lively small town of Forks. Cars were parked on the side and seemed to gather dust. Looking toward the street he saw a lone figure leaning against a light post. Auburn hair blew in the wind. Edward walked toward the figure, curious to see if she knew anything about the town's disappearance.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: "And Then Buffy Staked Edward."), by Raskolnikov (COMPLETE!): The formation of Cylon Raiders rose in the sky like a wave of metal. The hawklike ships headed towards the battered hull of the old battlestar....
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Once Bitten, Twice Shy), by Greystar (sequel COMPLETE!): "Jeez! Daria always gave me gas when she was alive, but this is ridiculous!"
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Once Bitten, Twice Shy), by Wraith (COMPLETE!): "Isn't she just perfect bait? In a manner of speaking. I mean, in the stories aliens or UMAs or whatever always go for the cute, timid, scared ones first, right? And predators always go for the weakest of the pack. Natural selection is a basic principle."