Poison in the Sloppy Joe Mix

The episode "Gifted" first aired on this day in 1998. In it, Daria and Jodie decided to stick with the idiots at Lawndale High over the idiots at Grove Hills. We also met Jodie's parents and saw Quinn inflict her personality on Jane for an entire night. No wonder Jane was at the breaking point the next morning.

A few AU fanfics have explored what might happen if Daria were to attend Grove Hills. Charles RB wrote Grove Hell on Earth and a sequel, Grove Hell 2: All the Lawndale People, in which Daria starts at Grove Hills upon arriving in Lawndale. Ajar wrote Regifted and an unfinished (jab, jab) sequel, Regifted 2: I Put Away Joyless Things, which branches off from "Gifted" and shows both Daria and Jodie attending Grove Hills from that episode onward.

Fanfic Update!

• Boxing Ms. Morgendorffer, by Chris Tucker (part 6): "Daria Morgendorffer had always been shy. She never really mastered the 'social niceties' the way her friend Jane had done. Daria's love of academia was partly due to the nature of the community she adopted as her own. Eccentricity was the norm, and she was accepted as just another academic. So, a week wasted as she kept putting off what she wanted to do, all the while cursing her shyness."


• Coffee Break (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "'I'm the queen of bad relationships,' Jane lamented with a roll of her china-blue eyes. 'I swear, there's no way I will enter into a relationship if it's not doomed.' 'Yeah?' Jane's smile widened as her hand was lifted from the glass and wrapped in a pair of long, warm hands. Their fingers wound together; it was a perfect fit. 'Well, now I'm wondering what I could possibly say to have a chance at a first date.'"


• Daria, or the Confession of a Single Lonely Male, by Arena del Sur: "Nothing could be more innocent than the part in that glossy auburn hair with that silky sheen on the temple; nothing could be more naïve... But what sickening envy the lecherous fellow whoever he was, would have experienced had he known that every nerve in me was still anointed and ringed with the desire of her distant body, the body of some immortal demon disguised as a female child."


• Esteemster Series, by TheExcellentS (part 6): "Dave: "Spike, I don't know what you're thinking, you fucking idiot, but PUNKS DON'T PLAY WITH KITTENS!" Spike: "But..." Dave: "I said, PUNKS DON'T PLAY WITH KITTENS!" (Dave closes the door and gently places the kitten on a bench between them) Dave: "Oh my God, it's like the cutest thing ever! Kittens rock!""


• Fate Leads to Another, by Temppeli (COMPLETE!): "The door of the room opened. Instead of hearing the hoarse voice of professor Zhekov, I heard a monotonic female voice. 'Zdravstvujte. Professor Zhekov is on his vacation...' I saw a woman in front of the lecture room. She was tiny, dark haired and pale and she wore round glasses and a formal suit. Somehow she resembled me, except she was about ten years older. 'My name is Darya Morgendorkova, and I'll be your substitute for next few weeks.'"


• Five Minutes to Midnight - 11:55, by untra (parts 4 - 8): "They looked at me all at once. Staring at me. Judging me. Who was this girl? Why was she here? Where did she come from? Is she new here? My stomach churned with discomfort and irritation. It always felt like this. Too many eyes, staring at me. It created a feeling of nausea and dirtiness- as if you had been covered in mud for days only to further deny yourself a shower." (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8)


• Homeless Daria Episode 2: You Invited This On Yourself, by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "Brittany sweated. It wasn't that she had anything against punky girls like them, but the rest of the guests might be uncomfortable. 'Maybe if you helped me with school, too...' 'We don't go to school.' Jane said. 'You probably know more about all that stuff than we do by this point.' 'As if I didn't feel inadequate before...' Daria said." (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10)


• I Was A Teenage Sex Kitten..., by Erin M. (part 4): "Jane turned to face the camera and fixed the lens with an alien stare that made the producers in the control room pale, and the cameraman want to piss himself. 'We WILL find you,' Jane said coldly, 'And when we do, and we're sure Mrs. Morgendorffer is safe, you are going to find out exactly why the most notorious toy in the Zippotronian arsenal is called a Paingasmer.'"


• J-D1-3 (Iron Chef - Jodie the Inventor), by Civanfan (COMPLETE!): "The automaton resembled a unholy cross between Rosie the Robot, Futura from Metropolis, and a Sherman Tank. Sparks randomly flew from its hodge-podge body, (Adorned across its well-endowed steel chest with the hand-painted appellation of "J-D1-3") , along with occasional tiny bits of metal. One of its stubby wire-covered arms ended in an almost-human hand, the other terminated in a variety of tools, some of which looked rather sharp."


• Legion of Lawndale Heroes 'Mini': Cat's Night Out, by RLobinske (part 1): "He grinned and said, 'What are our two little security testers up to tonight? Find any interesting places you were not supposed to be and the security specialists swore was impossible to get into?' 'Meowrr maoror.' Bump said, beginning a stately walk past Armalin. We know that there's fish up there. 'Reorar,' Sissy said. And we'll find it."


• Not So Different 53: Coming To Terms, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Sonny had enough trouble sounding enthusiastic on the rare occasions when he actually was enthusiastic. He couldn't make his congratulations sound sincere. He'd got the point at once: for two months Jane would be away from Lawndale and away from him. She wouldn't even respond to his endeavours to extract information about the location of the artists' colony. She just told Sonny that with her away he'd have that much more time for his 'budding social life'."


• Not So Different 54: Turning To Account, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "The hard part was when Sonny told his mother that she should make a point of going to the meeting and paying extra-close attention, especially if Principal Li started talking very quietly. His parents had to go to his mother's office Super Bowl party. Helen had even gone to the trouble of calling in favours from no less than five of her colleagues to get them to promise to talk with Jake. She suggested that if Sonny was so concerned about the review meeting, he should go himself. Damn! thought Sonny. I really should have known better than to light the fuse on that petard."


• Not So Different 55: Still Trying To Find A Map, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "His father squirmed and started involuntarily gurning. 'Uh, Sonny, if this is about ...' 'It's not about sex, if that's what you're thinking. Don't worry, true love waits.' 'True love?' Jake was wide-eyed with puzzlement. 'Is—but hold on, what does it wait for?' 'It was a joke, Dad. Don't worry, if I get pregnant you'll be the first one I tell.'"


• Of Another Man's Guitar, by peapotmaster (part 2): "FEMALE VOICE: Get in. MEG: Thanks. (The camera turns to see Daria Morgendorffer at the wheel, as the crowd cheers.) DARIA: What was that? MEG: You'll get use to it. My name is Meg Griffin."


• Requiem for a QB (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'I am at a loss for words today,' Michael James Mackenzie said. 'A man that I have known my entire life is gone. The world has changed. I feel like Robert E. Lee at the death of Stonewall Jackson - that whereas he has lost his life, I am among the walking wounded. I am almost beyond consolation.'"


• Singed Rainbow, by Lord Yellowtail (parts 1 - 4): "When Rita's Ranger was on the rampage, Jason had been so caught up in his rage and fury at the way she had played them all -- took away Billy and watched as they nearly imploded in on themselves, none of them having realized just how important he was not just to their survival but team harmony as well -- that Jason hadn't realized what was going on until it was almost too late." (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5)


• Single White Females (Iron Chef: Daria and Amelia: Roommates!), by InvisibleDan (COMPLETE!): "Amelia walked into the dorm room wearing a long brown wig, large round glasses, and an outfit identical to Daria's. 'Hey, look at me. Now we look like sisters!'"


• Taming Of The Misery Chick (for adoption), by Ranger Thorne: "'I'm Shannon Miller, and I'm the director of this production of Taming of the Shrew. I want to thank you all for coming out tonight. I see we have some people returning from our other plays, and some new faces.' For a second, it seemed that she was looking right at Daria."


• The True Hollywood Story of Daria Morgendorffer, by DIsaac (parts 6 and 7): "This morning, The star of the MTV show 'Daria' is in jail! Actress Daria Morgendorffer was arrested outside of the home of her co-star Trent Lane in Los Alameda. Police said Morgendorffer was outside of the home yelling obscenities and throwing empty bottles of whiskey at his car and at his windows of his home. According to court files that we found, Morgendorffer was under a restraining order that was placed on her by Lane. MTV had no comment at the time." (Part 7)


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Amelia: Roommates!), by eujennya (COMPLETE!): "Amelia: Hey, Daria! Isn't that.... boy underwear, over there on the floor next to your bed?"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Amelia: Roommates!), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "Daria sat at her desk, headphones on full blast with her face buried in a book, yet she still couldn't drown out the noises from the other half of the room. With a sigh, she put the book down, took off her headphones, and, grabbing an icebucket from her closet, walked down to the communal kitchen. As she filled the bucket from the hotel-style ice machine, tapping her foot in impatience, another girl from their floor walked in."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef - Jodie the Inventor), by Chris Tucker: "August 1942. The War was not going well for the Allies. Civilian plants that churned out automobiles, juke boxes, slot machines, typewriters and refrigerators were being slowly converted to manufacture tanks and airplanes and rifles and pistols and all the other hardware, large and small, of total warfare." (Part 2)


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef - Jodie the Inventor), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "Jodie walked up to Mack at school, a huge grin on her face. 'Hey,' he said, confused. The last he'd heard from her was on Friday, when she had broken their date. Again. 'Mack, I've found a solution for our problem!' she said, pulling him by the arm towards her car."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Hyrin (COMPLETE!): "'So, have you told your family about your new hobby?' Jane asked, laying on Daria's bed and flipping thru a magazine. 'No, and I'll thank you to keep it that way,' Daria called from the closet as various articles of clothing flew out randomly."


• w4w, by Smijey (part 1): "She stopped just short of the table. 'Don't I know you?' she asked in a strangely accented, yet strangely familiar voice. 'Oh God,' Daria muttered, every inch of her skin turning red from a humiliation-flavored blush. 'You're Quinn's sis...cousin!' Sandi Griffin said, equally shocked and horrified. 'Oh God,' Daria repeated."