BACK in the SADdle Again!

Mr. DeMartino has found a new career by following in the footsteps of Gene Autry, who was born on this day in 1907. While "singing cowboy" doesn't offer that much more dignity than "teacher," it does mean that he doesn't have to deal with Kevin and Brittany as students anymore. An overall win!

I have no doubt that the decreased stress will be good for his heart condition, which is great because it's also World Heart Day! Jake should be celebrating this one by avoiding things that upset him (which is just about everything) and finally telling everyone what the doctor told him about cheese.

He should probably lay off the caffeine, as well, even though it's National Coffee Day. Quinn will approve of that decision, but Helen simply will not function at her usual 200% without her morning coffee.

Fanfic Update!

• Alison's Last Word, by riotsquirrrl (COMPLETE!): "Jane mopped her brow with her bandanna and squinted at the white cube of the gallery. The show was nearly fully mounted and she still didn’t know what painting she was going to put on that last bit of wall."


• And so what? We have free will anyway, by natalieee_139 (part 11): "'But mooooom! Why do we have to get Daria back?! It's not like she's important or anything anyway!' Quinn whined, stomping on the Lane's porch."


• Her Last Words, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (part 100): "Anna Coulthard looked all around her to admire the gardens of Starlight Castle as she walked beside Lockie that cold and snowy morning. It was the very first time that she was allowed in the castle grounds after all, since she had finally completed her Agent trials four days ago, and Anna was really happy that she would be there to witness history that day."


• LLH Reboot, by roentgen (part 3): "Daria, Jane, Tom and Stacy waited outside the Major's office. It was time for the 'lessons learned' part of the training exercise."


• Spider Quinn 18 A Birthday and Stormy Sonnets, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "Officer Peterson was still on duty at the station. William was still in one of the cells, waiting for his parents to come with their part of the story, and for transport back to the hospital as a patient. She knew it was going to continue to be a mess."

Watch Out For Those Dark Circles!

I'm not sure if that's coffee Daria's drinking (especially because at one point during that scene her mug is a glass instead), but let's pretend it is because today is National Coffee Day! Don't tell Quinn, though. She'd be devastated.

Still, Daria should take it easy because today is also World Heart Day, and too much caffeine can't be good for her. Especially since she has a family history of heart attacks.

Fanfic Update!

• Crystal Claw, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (part 20): "'Hello mom!' Ella Anne called out happily, even standing up fast so that she could pull a chair for the sleepy Helen to sit down- 'As you can see, breakfast is ready! Nothing special, but I hope you like this special recipe of mine... I trust you slept well?'"


• Doctor Who - Changes in Time and Space, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 5.2): "The TARDIS materialised outside the town. 'The Old West,' the Doctor said. 'That’s good. Haven’t been there for a while,' Felicia said."


• Navel Gazing for Fun and Profit, by entrancedcat (COMPLETE!): "Upchuck - Feisty...lady! Daria - No, I won't show you my belly button."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic Should Have: How did We survive?), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Dad, why are we at the bank at this hour?' Daria asked as she follow Jake into the First Central Gotham Bank."

Coffee and Cookies, Anyone?

Daria's happily celebrating International Coffee Day, unless that's cocoa she's drinking. I know which I'd prefer, anyway!

I have the perfect complement to that hot beverage, too, because today is also National Homemade Cookies Day! I hope no one in the Morgendorffer family takes the "homemade" part seriously, though, because Daria with cookies is creepy, Jake's a menace in the kitchen, and Helen gets thwarted by refrigerated cookie dough. Interestingly, Quinn might actually do a decent job. I mean, she did make a layer cake for Kevin and it looked okay.

Fanfic Update!

• Boxing Quinn, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Quinn's car was driving along in a thunderstorm. Inside, Quinn was crying as she drove through torrential rain at a speed that would be dangerous even in calm weather."


• Danny Morgendorffer, by ST91 (part 51): "Jake Morgendorffer was in a very bad mood. Scolding the three thugs who had throw the water balloon at him was of little use ..."


• Doctor Who - Changes in Time and Space, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "The found Sabrina hunched over the console looking at the encryption of the Drahvin plan file with confusion..."


• Lawndale, by peapotmaster (part 1): "A teenage girl with glasses, a green jacket, and a black skirt entered the police station, as she walked up to the front desk to a plump cop drinking a decaf coffee."

"Coffee...caffeine. Dark circles. Capisce?"

Daria's enjoying what might or might not be coffee on National Coffee Day, but she'd better not overdo it. Today is also World Heart Day, and too much caffeine wouldn't be healthy. Jake should take note, too, although I think caffeine for someone as high-strung as Jake is a bad idea even without his heart condition.

Fanfic Update!

• Burned Out, by Wrabbit7 (part 14): "Jennifer yawned wide, earning herself a painful CLICK in her jaw. As she walked into the kitchen, still in her oversized nightshirt, she saw her mother sitting at the table, documents spread across it as she compared two piles of paper in her hands, and another laying before her."


• Cancerous Like Me, by Lady Evil (part 1): "Another day, Highland High was letting out. 'Of course I want to have dinner with you tonight, Tom!' Quinn was saying on her cell phone. 'But you know how important the fashion club is! Oh, yes, of course you're important too! Why don't you pick me up at Sandi's place at around sixish and we'll take it from there? Oh, I can borrow something from Sandi if I have to dress up first.'"


• Daria Ravenclaw: The Year of the Owl, by Meester_Lee (part 11): "Daria had never thought that an eleventh birthday would ever be important. But it was, at least in the magical world. She was now old enough to attend Ilvermorny and Hogwarts might or might not send her their acceptance letter."


• Divisive Loyalties (Iron Chef: Mack Is Jane's Addition), by Youth of Oz (COMPLETE!): "'Do you think I complain a lot?' asked Daria as she lay in Mack's arms, her auburn hair feathering against his dark chocolate skin. She was frowning slightly, but her glasses magnified it into a deeply-troubled scowl."


• From Champ To Chump, by WildDogJJ (parts 1 and 2): "It's a brisk Friday night in the fall, which means only one thing: high school football. On the field Lawndale is playing a close game against Oakwood." (Part 2)


• You Want It Darker, by LSM (part 13): "'I told you you'd knock ‘em dead, baby.' She was curled up on Todd's lap, snuggled into him as he played with strands of her hair, strong fingers untangling the knots firmly but gently."

Regular or Decaf?

Daria's all set for National Coffee Day, as long as Quinn doesn't catch her and start lecturing her about dark circles. She might want to save her lecturing for Jake, anyway, because today is also World Heart Day and I think I saw him getting the cooking pot out a few minutes ago. That can only end badly.

Finally, G'mar Tov to anyone observing Yom Kippur tonight.

Fanfic Update!

• Cops And Robbers And Magic, by psychotol (part 30): "Matilda looked at reports of robbery of small stores. You want to fight a war, you have to get money from somewhere, they picked up grenades from those white supremacists, and some cash and ammo."


• Drake And Jane Diaries, by James the Lesser (part 3): "Jane... Went to her mom. She ran, hitchhiked, and whatever else until she got to her mom. She's nuts. Maybe back in the seventies you could hitchhike without ending up chopped to pieces but today... I'm just happy she's safe."


• Harry Potter Morgendorffer, by Meester_Lee (parts 5 - 7): "There was a different receptionist at the front desk when she came in the following day. The receptionist did not take it well when Helen stated her business." (Part 6) (Part 7)


• Life Cycle (Defect/Bug), by TalkingAnimals (COMPLETE!): "You feel...small. You wish you had a better emotional vocabulary; you actually wish you had a better grasp on your whole emotional register, period."


• A Place On Earth (Pasta's Never-ending Ideas Thread!), by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "Daria Morgendorffer didn't wonder about the afterlife. By the time she was ten years old, she'd come to the conclusion that God didn't exist."


• Quinn, Episode 2: New Horizons, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see Quinn, Lindy, and Jane sitting on the floor. With the aid of Jane's trusty glue gun the three of them are making multi-colored mirror frames." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Quinn, Episode 3: Sibling Anxiety, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "We see a woman with graying red hair watching a baby play with letter blocks on the floor. The small child has on a green shirt and black overalls." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Unnamed story (LLH - Short Entries), by Roentgen (part 48): "'This wouldn't be a very difficult alteration to do,' Danielle Todds said. 'And I could make it permanent.'"


• Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Why are you making me do this for you again?' Daria asked. 'Dah-r-i-AAAH? Who doesn't wish to be able to talk to animals?' Quinn said."


• Unnamed story (World's Shortest Crossover, Part XIV: The Crossover Awakens!) by WacoKid (COMPLETE!): "'Now then,' Ms. Li explained, 'The two of you are all ready to be students here at Lawndale High. But there's one last thing.' 'Is this another test?' Quinn asked with a frown. 'Or is it more story time pictures?'"

"Fashion show, Mom. Don't handicap yourself."

Daria's enjoying a rare peaceful moment on International Coffee Day, and I'm sure Jake's going to join her soon. Let's just hope he's got decaf, though. Also, Quinn wants to remind everyone that coffee = caffeine = dark circles. That was today's public service announcement.

Speaking of Jake, today is also World Heart Day, so whatever you do, don't mention what the doctor told him about cheese.

Fanfic Update!

• Another Saint Daria, by LSauchelli (part 1): "'Where did I go wrong?' She wondered out loud. But she knew."


• Backstage Preparations (Iron Chef: Oh No, She Didn't!), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "(Scene: the backstage of a beauty pageant. A young woman is preparing to go on stage. She is assisted by three other women) 'All right, Daria, again: considering the current world state of affairs and the threat posed by extremist terrorist political groups with the operating all over the world, what do you think...'"


• First Words (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: No longer in the 1%), by DarkDranzer (COMPLETE!): "It was spring time in the old DeMartino residence that normally housed two occupants. Tonight, however, was a special night where the elder member of the household was expecting this evening to go well."


• Forced Impression, by Indigo (part 4): "'You don't think nearly all my clothes going missing at the same time as we moved to a new town just happened, do you?' 'You mean mom arranged it somehow?' 'Yep, this way no one in Lawndale got to see the real me.'"


• Loopholes (Scenes No Daria Fan-Fic Should Have: No longer in the 1%), by DarkDranzer (COMPLETE!): "Anthony DeMartino was grinning ear to ear, sure the school he teaches at is an irredeemable cesspit of corruption and failure but today he's been given a lifeline."


• Occupy Lawndale (Iron Chef: Billionaire Daria), by InvisibleDan (COMPLETE!): "It began on my eighteenth birthday. I woke up from a dream that I couldn't remember. That always irritates me."


• Psychiatric Devaluation, by DarkDranzer (part 4): "On the other side of the door Anthony growled, he could just picture Barch's damn smug face right now. However, Li's comment hit a raw nerve. All she saw was the glory of Laaawndale High, all the more glorious for her because she didn't have to teach the damn idiots that populated it."


• Redux, by Princess_Pasta (part 14): "A slight figure dressed in a form-fitting pair of black jeans and a heavy jacket stood on the edge of the railroad tracks, cool night air blowing her long hair in several directions. She stood and stared, the tiny suburb of Lawndale seemingly gigantic as it was spread out before her."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Billionaire Daria), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "'Well I can't believe it! The old bat finally gave up the ghost finally.' Jake said in his joking manner. 'JAKE!' Helen said quickly to remind him of where the family was."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Billionaire Daria), by TheTuxedo (COMPLETE!): "Daria paid the clerk and took her pizza to the only empty booth, where she sat down alone. She liked to come here occasionally to pretend she was someone else, someone who wasn't judged on the size of her wallet."


• Up In Smoke, by Princess_Pasta (part 1): "Quinn tried not to let her restlessness affect her work performance...no matter how tiring her job was becoming. As an administrative assistant, she had to do lots of menial tasks that made her want to rip every red hair from her head."

"Coffee...caffeine. Dark circles. Capisce?"

I suspect quite a few Daria fans will join Jane in celebrating National Coffee Day, so grab a mug (or two) and get your morning pick-me-up. Quinn will just be sitting over there, moaning about how badly you're going to do in the Mother-Daughter Fashion Show.

I'm sure Brittany will be happy to know that today is also World Heart Day, because hearts mean romance and she loves romance novels! To celebrate, let's share some of Helen's heart-smart lima bean cupcakes...on second thought, let's go grab a pizza instead. I'd rather take my chances with the clogged arteries.

Fandom News!

• Talk about the laughable list of requirements one man is demanding of any would-be partner.


• When exactly does personal responsibility go out the window? breitasparrow wonders about alcohol as an excuse for bad behavior.


• Daria made TV Guide's list of the 60 greatest cartoons. Discuss the ranking and see who else made the cut!


• Jeremy Garrett and Robyn have artwork requests in the Easel.


• What was your favorite artwork from 2013?


• Give your opinion of the fanfic series Abruptly Amy in Golden Oldies.

Ponderables to Ponder over a Cup of Java

Lots going on today. First, it's the anniversary of the birth of the Singing Cowboy, Antonio DeMartino Gene Autry. Not sure if DeMartino is trying to be him, but who cares.

It's also the birthday of a piano-pounding star of rock-n-roll's early years, Jerry Lee Lewis, famed for one song in particular (turn up your speakers).

As you see at right, today also marks the start of Michaelmas, and who better than Saint Mack to represent that. Do it to it.

There's more! This is also the 462st anniversary of the birth of Miguel de Cervantes, who wrote Don Quixote. A surprising number of Daria fanfics reference this character, so Cervantes (often credited with the invention of the modern novel) is a solid part of Daria fandom's background.

Do you use ballpoint pens? You should know that today is the anniversary of the birth of the guy who invented them, László József Bíró. Argentina celebrates this event as Inventor's Day.

If you like to read banned books (and who doesn't?), this week is Banned Books Week, and you should go out and get another banned book to read before they are REALLY banned and gone. Srsly.

Finally, this is National Coffee Day in the U.S., and caffeine is good for you, so have another cup. And another. And another. Keep going, no problemo. Remember, a love of coffee (houses) was the root of the whole problem in "Cafe Disaffecto," and it was in "Pierce Me" that Helen Morgendorffer uttered those famous words, "I NEED MY COFFEE!" And why not try out the latest coffee fad? Go for it! Caffeine didn't hurt Ms. Li in "Fizz Ed," did it?

Wow, that was a lot to go over. Have some more caffeine and stay tooned.