Okay, Some Fandom News For A Change

PPMB's Top 10 in Review

 

Your Secret Service Code Name

 

A Possible Quinn Sighting?

 

Brother Grimace is looking for music recommendations

 

Roentgen asks if Lawndale is a character

 

Daria, the fashion editor?

Daria and malls mentioned in AV Club article

Yeah, I know I'm being slack.  It'll take a little time to get back into the habit compulsion.

 

 

I'm Back...

Since our regular host seems to be preoccupied with her massively cute daughter (a future Quinn, perhaps?), it's up to the slacker part of the staff to keep things going and maybe, be mildly interesting.

We're also looking for new suckers, no, victims, no, volunteers!  Yeah, that's it, volunteers.  You know, to write and otherwise fill space around here.  Oh, and maybe help keep up with fandom news.

Or maybe we should keep it loose.

But What Will the Wind Speed Do to Her Hair?

Happy Aviation Day! Quinn's all ready to take off...as soon as she finishes packing her suitcases with all the latest fashions.

Also, happy birthday to Gene Roddenberry, creator of Star Trek, born on this day in 1921. Not only are there a number of Star Trek fans in Daria fandom, but there have been at least a couple of Star Trek/Daria crossovers in fanfic.

Fandom News!

• Let's cheer each other up with a new thread!


• What was the world's dumbest fight you ever had?


• What are your viewing habits when it comes to Daria?


• How would you define Jane's religious beliefs as seen in "Groped By an Angel"?


• Talk about the new Sailor Moon in the Weapons of Mass Distraction forum.


• Lord Yellowtail is looking for writing help related to makeout points or scenic overlooks.

"...Poems don't even have to rhyme. How easy is that?"

It's Bad Poetry Day, and if we're lucky then Jeffy will favor us with a reading of one of Ms. Morgendorffer's great masterpieces. Brace yourselves for this one.

The greasy fry,
It cannot lie.
Its truth is written
On your thighs.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Jane's Addition," although considering some of the fandom's reaction to Tom's Sloane's introduction, maybe we should stick with the poetry. Still, the episode did give us Mystik Spiral's "Mr. Normal" song, so at least there's that.

Fanfic Update!

• Another Slice (Another AU (maybe an IC?)), by DeacBlue (COMPLETE!): "She opened the door to see Daria sitting on the side of her bed. Closing the door behind her, she walked over and plopped down next to her. 'You're gay, Daria? Or just bi?' she wondered aloud."


• The Creepyling Chronicles, by Charles RB (part 10): "'Darling, do you think Mafalda is teething?'"


• Crossing Stars, by Silver: "'Good news is the safeties are working, so no power surges to shut down reactor containment or burning fuel running up the line. Bad news is we're gonna be a heckuva lot less manueverable, not to mention that we're out a third of our normal accel.' Jane sighed. 'We're not going to get that engine back up without time on the ground, but it won't sheer off when we turn.'"


• Curing Jealousy, by Shiva (part 1): "'Life takes you strange places,' Darin thought with bemusement at this latest strange hand that he had been dealt."


• The Daria Morgendorffer Show (World's Medium-Sized Crossover), by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "'I'm supposed to see a Mr. Grant about a research position.' Daria asked hesitantly. 'It's been filled.'"


• Family Reunion, by januense (part 9): "There was a big, rusty, iron gate, fixed to a couple of rocky pillars. On one of them she could read the word 'Addams', composed of rusted iron letters. An unpaved alleyway started from there. She followed its path with her eyes until she saw the house at the top of the hill. She stared, perplexed, just for a couple of seconds, at the old, ill looking, house and at the incongruous giant excavator that was passing just in front of it, then, she just shrugged, exhaling a long breath."


• Family Reunion (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Jake: Helen, have you heard from Daria and Tom yet? (Helen hobbles over. She wears glasses now and is in her nineties as well. She looks much less like fearsome litigator Helen and more like quilting bee Helen.) Helen: Daria was going to stop and pick up a pie, and Tom was going to file for Medicare."



• A Man and his Box, by ThanatosRW (parts 1 - 4): "At five years old, Daria Morgendorffer had seen things no five year old should see."


• Memories, by januense (COMPLETE!): "From the end of the hallway, a figure appeared, coming from one of the side doors, standing, silent, for a couple of seconds, slowly spinning the head on both directions, as looking for something, or someone."


• Runaway Daria: Fallout Lawndale Edition, by Vukodlak (part 9): "'Joey kinda grabbed Daria’s chest.' Jane added shifting her feet and gesturing to the girl in question. In hindsight they both felt they could have restrained their fellows ending the fight before security showed up. 'So I punched him in the face.' She shrugged at her perfectly reasonable response."


• Scarlett the Fairy Goes on Vacation, by Aloysius (part 2): "She left the Maxi-Mart and saw that the two boys were looking at her in amazement. One had blond hair and a prominent chin and pointy nose; he also wore a shirt with the words 'Death Rock' imprinted on it. She learned that his name was Beavis. The other boy had darker hair, a big nose and no chin. His shirt merely had the word 'Skull' imprinted on it. She had to hold in her laughter when she learned that his name was Butt-head."


• ST: A Tale of Temporal Gifting (Non-Daria), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (prologue): "Instantly she came face to face with the image of William Samuels, Director of the Estaria Sector Division of Commonwealth Intelligence. 'Miss Allenby, I’ve just been made aware of a situation that requires your unique skills.' He began without permeable."


• Unexpected Hookup: Underneath It All, by Shiva (part 6): "Jamie pulled himself together as best he could and said as calmly as he could, 'Do you want to go out?' '...Like on a date?' Jane replied with an eyebrow slowly being raised up. '...Yeah.' Jamie replied."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Jane:' So Kevin is still working at the nut kiosk?'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Daria:' Was it worth it Jane? You killed Trent and my dad, burned down half of Lawndale, and now your turning humanity into slaves for Cthulhu.'"



• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Jane:' ...so you see Daria; there really is an alien invasion going on. I represent the interests of an advanced civilization and were taking earth. Your my best friend. I feel closer to you than anyone I've ever met back home; and I want you at my side when the hostilities start.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Silver (COMPLETE!): "'Order and chaos. Law and anarchy. That's what this is about.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by ThanatosRW (COMPLETE!): "Upchuck - Oh, my fragile petal -- either you do your share, or I tell everyone we're dating."


• Unnamed story (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "As Tom left the pizza place, he was determined that Daria would not see him cry. He was a man, dammit, and he wouldn't let her have the satisfaction of winning the breakup."


• Unnamed story (Scream Scenes), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "There is a face in the mirror."


• WaM, Ma'ams, Dark Paladin, by DeacBlue (part 8): "'But after we sat down, I did start thinking about it. Daria, if we just wing it by the seat of our pants, at best, we're not going to get full cooperation. At worst, they're going to be actively hostile. And I don't think your plans envision us working completely alone.' Daria considered. 'All right, Quinn.' She turned to April. 'I'm sorry, but would you please change the settings to 405 Beacon Street, our universe.'"

Strike a Pose, There's Nothing to It

Happy birthday to Madonna, who was born on this day in 1958. Helen's taking some time out from the firm to strike the singer's famous "Vogue" pose, but let's hope Eric doesn't get a glimpse of her like that. It could give him...ideas.

Fandom News!

• Dervish is looking for any ideas for using up mozzarella.


• Why is smoking in public frowned upon in the US? Join in the discussion!


• See some adorable Daria merchandising on Zazzle.


• How did DeFoe/DeMartino come to be?


• Three Iron Chefs have been posted in Creative Writing: DeacBlue's Another AU, BrownEyedBagel's Write the next scene, and Charles RB's Mack is a Dick.


• DIsaac posted an art Iron Chef in the Easel: Same old duo......Just a bit older.

See, Jake and Helen Have the Right Idea!

Sorry for the later-than-usual update! Please see this thread for the details. I'll still be keeping up with the blog, but updates will most likely be a bit more sporadic.

Today is National Relaxation Day, so why not take a load off? I'm sure Trent would celebrate the holiday if we told him about it, but I'd hate to wake him up.

According to The Daria Diaries, today was also the first day of Alternapalooza. See if you can catch a ride to Swedesville, but don't forget to bring a glue gun just in case.

Fanfic Update!

• The 180 Degree Turn ch. 2: Four Lines No Waiting, by Walter Kovacs (part 1): "Before Jake could switch into full rant mode, he was interrupted by the doorbell ringing. 'Saved by the bell,' quipped Amy in genuine relief as she got up to answer the door. The person at the door was none other than Elsie Sloane wearing her usual pale blue shirt, dark blue pants, purple scarf and matching purple headband. 'Hey, is Daria up yet?' asked Elsie."


• And While the Heavens Fall..., by oni (prologue): "The flesh burnt individual finally got off the ground and started to move down the street; looking for someone or something to tell him when and where he is in the world."


• Apology Accepted (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Daria! Tom! What the hell are you two doing?'"


• As Luck Would Have It (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by breitasparrow (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane were walking to school one morning like they always did, when on the way there they came across an ambulance and a blue Pinto."


• The Big Man (A kinda-sorta IC - No Gas!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "He still remembered when this was all rundown houses and rusty cars and, in the distance, the trailers - and now it was the same but the houses and trailers were all spruced up, all sorts of fancy gadgets were over the places, and everyone left their homes in some real splashy little numbers. The cars were gone but so what? Highland was never that big."



• Blood: My Best Friend 3, by Smijey (part 1): "Hospitals smell weird. I don't like being in them. But I have to visit Daddy. I have something very important to do."


• The Boston Boxer (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane were enjoying the late spring weather in Boston, taking the opportunity to explore the city on a Saturday when neither of them had many assignments due at Raft or BFAC. Daria suddenly noticed a box out of one corner of her eye, laying down in an alleyway. 'It's a box,' she noted to herself."


• The Bully, by DeacBlue (COMPLETE!): "'That mean Tommy. He said that dolls were for babies, and that I was just a baby, and I asked him why he carried a GI Joe doll around, and he said - said it was an action figure,' she said, then made a big sniffling sound. 'It's a doll, and I said so, and he beat me up, and tore Barbie's arm off!'"


• The Creepyling Chronicles, by Charles RB (parts 8 and 9): "'Your daughter sucks, Beavis,' said an offended Butt-head. 'Isn’t she ever gonna do anything cool?'" (Part 9)


• Dylan, by J-D (part 7b): "Dylan looked up as the door opened, and saw Upchuck framed in the doorway in what she must think was a seductive pose. 'Why, what excellent progress you’re making on that maze! I do like to see a man who’s good with his hands. Of course I know you have the ability to finish this whole project by yourself, but I do hope you’ll still make a little room somehow for little old me.'"


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 9 Soaking Up Summer, by Shiva (part 9): "Tori recognized a subject change and even though she was curious about this unexpected development she let it slide and replied, 'I wanted to talk face to face… Can we go somewhere quiet?' Evan raised an eyebrow at that until his mind caught on to what she meant, 'Oh sure, back yard will work I guess.'"


• Family New, by RLobinske (part 9): "Daria stopped at the door and watched it for several seconds, building the courage to open it. When the bell rang a second time, she inhaled and pulled the door. Standing outside, Rita's daughter Erin said, 'Oh Daria, I'm so sorry for your loss.' 'Erin?' Daria said, mildly surprised."


• Four Witnesses (DeFoe/DeMartino: how did it come to be?), by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "His arm was around another person. This was the surprise that made his eyes to snap open. It took a minute for his vision to clear, then— 'Agh!' 'Agh!'"


• The Fund-amentals (A kinda-sorta IC - No Gas!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'We've got nothing else left to cut or cap. I checked. I checked and then I got a friend up at Edward Tilghman Middle in Baltimore to check it as well. It's not only that bad, it's that bad for everyone. By the time of the next budget, Lawndale will be in better shape because of the hire firms springing up here but for now--'"



• A Happy Quinn Meets Evil Kitties (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "A very happy Quinn Morgendorffer skipped her way down the streets of Lawndale, her grades were improving, David Sorenson was back from college and was slowly falling for her charms as a budding intellectual, she had Stacy, Tiffany, and now Brooke as her three best friends, Sandi was in a mental institution being treated for her bitchiness, even Daria was coming around."


• Hey Tom! (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by breitasparrow (COMPLETE!): "Tom was waiting outside of Lawndale High next to his Pinto when Daria and Jane stepped out. Jane immediately went to him and simply called out 'I'll call you later!' to Daria."


• The Ice-Cream Man Cometh (IC: Mack is a Dick), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Hey mistew, couwd I pweeaze have a fudgicle?'"


• Immortal Blood, by Shiva (part 11): "Skylar couldn’t even feel the ground as he ran at top speed, instinctively ducking and dodging obstacles with ease, he wasn’t aware of it at the time but he was moving so quickly that he was almost completely invisible to the naked eye."


• The Lavender Club (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'This meeting of the Lavender Club is now called to order!' Jane Lane said in an authoritative tone and then wanged her gavel and added, 'I love doing that!' 'We know that Jane.' Daria replied as Jane sat down next her and laid her head on Daria's shoulder."


• Losers No More, by Shiva (part 5): "'What happens when a crazed animal hater tortures subjects female pooches to hours upon hours of sonic torture? It’s changing the pitch up to smack bitches up! Now on Sick, Sad World!' 'There is so much wrong with that statement that I think it gave me cancer!' Graham snapped before everyone else shushed him."


• The Mageborn Cynic, by peetz5050 (parts 14 and 15): "Surprised and touched Daria smiled at her. Aloud to the group she said 'Behold my sister, who will one day be the powerful and beautiful and above all wise Archmage Quinn of House Morgendorffer.'" (Part 15)


• A Man and his Box (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by ThanatosRW (COMPLETE!): "As Brittany turned around, she couldn't help but muse about how unreal the situation was. A strange man, a blue box, aliens, it was like something out of some bad sci-fi." (Continued by Roentgen) (Continued by Charles RB)


• Masters Degrees From Outer Space!, by psychotol (parts 1 - 3): "Daria walked to her class where she would learn subspace physics. This was an opportunity too good to resist. Even though that meant Jane was unable to accompany her."(Part 2) (Part 3)


• A New Clique (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by breitasparrow (COMPLETE!): "'But Sandi!' Quinn whined. 'You've been missing out on the Fashion Club meetings all week! What's so important that you have to forgo your presidential duties?'"


• QC 06: The Lab Mouse, the Geek and the Convention, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 10): "The Valiant and the Elantra pulled up in front of a rundown townhouse on the north-eastern edge of Lawndale. 'Still think that place in Texas is worse?' Mack asked. 'Yes,' Daria replied."


• Road Serviced (A kinda-sorta IC - No Gas!), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'You didn’t tell him?' 'No, Mother, I didn’t.' Elsie Sloane yawned, picking at her eggs. 'With everyone having to scrimp and change things around since – "that day" – things have been more boring than ever.'"



• Sexy Daria: Lab Lockdown Sex, by Shiva (part 3): "'Daria,' Barch said, 'Mack will be your lab partner for this project.' That caught her attention, 'What?!' 'You and Mack will design and construct a maze and condition a mouse to go through it using either Positive or Negative reinforcement.' 'Oh,' Daria breathed and for some reason felt very hot all of a sudden in spite of wearing clothing with very little fabric."


• Stupid Mirror (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Mother I don't know why do you want to look for him anyway.... ...I just don't want him looking for me did he leave the house it's just like him...."


• Tanks A Lot (A kinda-sorta IC - No Gas!), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "It took five minutes of intense pushing, a whole two minutes slower than if the van was still running, but Mystik Spiral finally had the Tank at the junkyard."


• That's Pep! (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Daria,' Jane said. 'Does anyone really think that these pep rallies actually increase attendance at school sports?' 'No,' Daria said, 'only the brain dead do. This is time I could be studying.'"


• To Annoy a Mockingbird. Chapter 06, by BF110C4 (part 1): "'Don’t worry Charles; we just want to have a frank conversation about the presents you gave us on Friday.' Only a fool would miss the dangerous glint that Daria had in her eye, and Charles Ruttheimer the Second hadn’t raised a fool."


• Tom's Exchange (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Tom Sloane opened his front door to find his girlfriend, Jane Lane on his front steps. 'Oh Hi!' She said in an exaggerated tone and then screamed, 'Go to hell!' She rushed at him with fists raised but before she could land a punch she was stopped in midstride by an invisible force."


• Trippy Daria (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Jane: Hey Daria. Jane: What are you doing here Wind?"


• Twin Tracks (chapter 1), by oni (part 1): "'Morning baby,' Sandi yawned with a sleepy smile on her face. Unwinding herself from Stacy, the brunette pushed away the loose hair from her face and looked over at the clock on the dresser. 'Nine-thirty,' she groaned as she pushed the covers off the bed."


• Unbearable, by Smijey (part 2): "'Daria, animals can't stalk.' Daria hugged her arms to herself, looking down at her boots. 'Well, this one can,' she said resolutely. 'Okay. This one can. Let's take that at face value -- for now -- and move on. WHY is it stalking you?'"


• Undying Love, by BrownEyedBagel (parts 12 and 13): "Vivian lay on a simple wooden table the way she usually did in situation like this. All her parts neatly organized along with enough tools to satisfy the most obsessed collectors." (Part 13)


• Unnamed story (IC: Mack is a Dick), by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "Detective Sergeant O'Malley sat back in his office chair and looked coldly at the young man seated opposite to him, handcuffed to a ring on the desk. He indicated the Colt .45 automatic in a clear plastic evidence bag on the desk between them and said 'Tell me Michael... or is it Mack? Where did you get the weapon?'"



• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Write the next scene), by BrownEyedBagel (group story): "Helen sighed as she stood up and walked around Angela’s desk. It wasn’t a tactic she employed often. Hell; usually when it came to this she chose to eat the loss. It was a disgraceful tactic, and risky if it failed." (Charles RB's scene) (JoeMerl's scene) (Dark Kuno's scene)


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by 45Ranger (COMPLETE!): "'I kissed your boyfriend. I kissed Tom. I didn't mean to.' With a frown, Jane turned to run off, only to collide bounce of a rather solid shirtless chest. Daria and Jane's eyes widened at the presence of Jesse Moreno..."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Daria:' Well...we did it. It took a lot of work, but we own the hottest fetish bar in the county."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'I'm starting to wish I hadn't brought Jodie into the circle,' said Mistress Daria, her legs resting on Tom. 'All she ever talks about is dominating people.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "A heavyset girl with freckles approached the van. 'Daria? Is that you?' 'No, I'm a decoy to flush out assassins.' She sighed. 'Hi, Amelia.'"


• Unnamed story (Scream Scenes), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "I killed again. It’s getting easier, but I’m not getting closer to what I want as fast as I want."


• Unnamed story (Scream Scenes), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'So. You're probably wondering why I asked you to come here. And yes, I know that's a horribly cliche way to start off, you don't have to give me that look. But even cliche things can be true, and I'm sure you are wondering, so just . . . just let me say what I need to say, okay?'"


• Uranium in the Drinking Water, by BF110C4 (part 1): "In a way she was quite envious of her fellow wives since they had interest that were more than acceptable for a Grayson woman. At least their husband encouraged and helped her with her own literally endeavors, if in a covert manner."


• We Are The World ()Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone, by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "Jane turned on the TV and leaned back on the couch as she checked out what was on. As she turned each channel, it seemed as if they were all showing the same thing."


• Worldhopper (Chapter 4), by Erin M. (part 3): "She became aware of the voices before the the light. 'It's got to be a trick.' 'Not from what I could see.' 'Then unless she's some sort of fast grown clone, I still say--'"


• Your Mouth to God's Ear (Daria and the Gang Thread), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'Stacy...don't do it! Don't pray!' Stacy was very surprised. 'Uh..are you some kind of atheist?' 'No!' Brittany looked around, to make sure no one was listening. 'It's too dangerous!'

A Cheerful Surprise

What's got the cheerleaders so surprised? Post your captions in the comments!

Awwwwww!

It's International Youth Day! Take some time to celebrate young people, although Daria probably won't be participating. "I don't like kids. I didn't even like kids when I was a kid."

Fandom News!

• RLobinske asks that everyone clean out their attachments to clear some space.


• Deref shares his photos from a trip to Central Australia.


• Learn how to look like Daria and Jane, courtesy of MTV.


• Doctor Who fans can check out a funny video clip and talk about the show.


• Another Bill and Ted movie? Talk about it in the thread!

Tasty Chocolate-Marshmallow-Graham Cracker Goodness!

Happy National S'mores Day! Helen's going to have hers a bit on the crispy side, but I prefer mine just a little brown and melty. How do you like your s'mores?

Fanfic Update!

• The A Grade, by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "'Mr. O’Neill', answered the young woman. 'I would like to talk to you about my grade in the last report.' She handed him a marked paper."


• All's Fare (A kinda-sorta IC - No Gas!), by DeacBlue (part 3): "'Enter,' Daria had said, and Stacy had, though she had been shaking so badly that Daria rolled her eyes. 'I'm not going to bite you, Stacy. Now, what do you need?' 'Well...Daria...You know how you're making money driving a car...' 'Yes?' Daria's eyebrows rose. 'C'mon. Out with it.'"


• Apathymorphs: The Invasion, by JoeMerl (epilogue): "His mind wandered. It had been several days now since the battle with the Yeerks; several days since he had crashed in the ocean of this strange planet, without working means to contact his fellow Andalites. Assuming any of them were still alive, or had the technology to get to him."


• At the Crossroads...(Chapter 13), by oni (COMPLETE!): "As Daria got up, Jane looked up at her and noticed that something was wrong. 'Hey amiga,' Jane called out as she watched her friend shoulder her way through the crowd, towards the entrance. She was about to get up and go outside herself when Sandi gently brought her hand to Jane’s wrist to stop her. 'Let go Sandi, I got to see what’s wrong!'"


• The Best Daria Fanfic Ever (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "Kevin sat and, as he often did on quiet Sunday afternoons, read the sports section of the newspaper. Though 'read' was perhaps a bit strong. 'Looked at the awesome four-color pictures and ignored the weird squiggly marks next to them' would be more appropriate."



• The Creepyling Chronicles, by Charles RB (parts 4 - 7): "'Oh, Tom,' sneered Elsie. 'How... avoidable. Well, go on then, bore me with your baby.'" (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7


• Daria Sloane's Noble Peace Prize Ceremony, Stockholm, Sweden (PLOT BUNNIES II: Still furry, Still free), by Shiva: "As Daria Sloane strode the stage of the Stockholm Concert Hall, wearing a stylish designer gown selected by her sister-in-law, Elsie Mackenzie, she maintained a cool mask even as she basked in the applause; even Carl XVI Gustaf seemed pleased rather than the vague sort of happy mask that European monarchs wore to stay above the fray."


• A Little Encouragement (A kinda-sorta IC - No Gas!), by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "'Jane... I don't think I can go through with this...'"


• Losers No More, by Shiva (part 4): "'Why's everyone staring?' Graham asked as he, David, and their new companions, Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane walked through the halls of Lawndale High."


• The Next Gen of Sloanes II (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Tommy Sloane smirked as he stood on the balcony of the Royal Suite in one of the most expensive hotels in Miami, he, his cousin Louis, Pat VIII and his twin sister Patricia all had their seperate bedrooms in this heavenly place."


• Sapphic Love (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'This is the hottest thing I've ever seen...' Jeffy hissed and the other guys next to him all murmured, 'Yeah...'"


• Scarlett the Fairy Goes on Vacation, by Aloysius (part 1): "Now, after Scarlett’s recent debacle in trying to get a Chicago-style stuffed crust pizza, she was reluctant to stowaway on another airplane. So, she bit her lower lip, buckled down and decided to actually buy an airplane ticket for a flight to Dallas, and then on to her grandmother’s place."


• TDJS Ch.3 Kung-Fu Party, by ST91 (part 1): "'Bye Quinn, and remember to not mistreat these poor guys. Not too much, anyway.' 'DARIO!!!'"



• Tom Is a Pretty Girl (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Quinn stood frozen in her doorway as her eyes processed what she was seeing."


• Unexpected Hookup: Underneath It All, by Shiva (part 5): "'We had music playing dammit!' Daria thought to herself with a snarl, 'But I guess the nosy older sister heard something cus why else would she be staring at me and Ron with that knowing smirk?!'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Timothy :' So, would anyone like to share how they felt about the last chapter I assigned? Tommy? I'm sure you would like to tell us about how'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'You know what Tommy Sherman is gonna do?' Tommy Sherman said with a snort while pulling something out of his pocket."


• Unnamed story (World's Medium-Sized Crossover), by BF110C4 (COMPLETE!): "In a way she was quite envious of her fellow wives since they had interest that were more than acceptable for a Grayson woman. At least their husband encouraged and helped her with her own literally endeavors."


• We Only Hurt the Ones We Love, by deneich (part 13): "'Jane, that's not true. I've worn this style of glasses since I was three years old. Anybody interested in who I am inside has seen past them.' 'Honestly, those glasses may have been appropriate for a three year old but on a nearly sixteen year old girl they're, definitely, put-offish... Daria, they're basically screaming keep the hell away from me.'"

Quiet, Please!

Today is Book Lover's Day! I doubt I have to encourage most of the people in this fandom to pick up a book today, but at least we can enjoy having a holiday made just for us!

If you need any suggestions, I might recommend Thoreau's Walden, which was published on this day in 1854. Remember, though, that Thoreau "was just mad at Jane Fonda. You know, he was her father in real life, too?"

Thank you, Brittany.

Fandom News!

• Dervish wonders, who buys from liars?


• What do you think about Sandi's "inside of the Concorde" comment in "Daria Dance Party"?


• Good news for Joss Whedon fans: Avengers 2 and a new TV series.


• Walter Kovacs offers food for thought: What if Daria was the one betrayed?


• Discuss "Cool" by Brandan League in the Golden Oldies forum.

Diving into One More Extracurricular Activity

Happy birthday to Esther Williams, retired competitive swimmer and actress. Jodie is trying to follow in her footsteps, but I think she's got a lot of work ahead of her if she wants to beat Williams's track record.

Fanfic Update!

• Armored Cynic Daria, Episode 3: Class in Session, by RX-87 (part 1): "O'NEILL: Hello there, kids! Welcome to the first session of the Special Armor Development Program! I'm Msgt. O'Neill and I'll be in charge of supervising you kids. We're gonna have a lot of fun and hopefully learn a lot, both about these emerging new technologies we'll be working with... And about ourselves."


• The Creepyling Chronicles, by Charles RB (part 3): "'Oh Tom, why don't you take Mafalda with you to the country club?' Thank you, dear, thank you very much."


• Daria & Son 3: Freakin' Friends Redux, by Erin M. (part 3): "Helen gives her a sympathetic expression. HELEN: Daria, that boy has been a major part of your life ever since Mark was in the third grade. He's practically your second child. DARIA: ...I'm not taking it well either."


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 9 Soaking Up Summer, by Shiva (part 8): "Coyote then decided to check on his wife who was taking a nap, but when he opened the door to their bedroom he heard the sounds of sobbing."


• Family New, by RLobinske (part 8): "'How did it go?' Daria let out a heavy sigh. 'Everyone was walking on eggshells around me, making me even more of an outcast than I was already. My English teacher had a breakdown and ran out of the room. The principal is planning a memorial for Quinn tomorrow.'"


• Fielding 2015: A Poor Roll of the Genetic Dice (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Walter Kovacs (COMPLETE!): "'Huh huh hey Jake watch me set fire to the headmaster's car' said Angier Sloane II, the auburn-haired half of the Sloane twins as he poured gasoline on the car and tossed a lit match."


• Hot For Student (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Pay... attention.' She said to cover her silence and then pointed at the board, 'Your... regular... teacher... assigned... a play... do you know... what it was?'"


• The Hunter Home from the Hill, by DeacBlue (part 17): "By the opening night of the coffeehouse, everyone in school had heard about the production that the club was going to put on, and the place was packed. The house lights went down, a violin (played by Scarlett) began playing, and Daria's voice carried over the PA system into the twilight. 'How one person changed the world.'"



• Immortal Blood, by Shiva (part 10): "'Feelings...' Skylar said to himself, 'I wonder how he’d like this feeling.' He then focused on that strange energy inside of him and imagined the strange runic symbol that would cause O’Neill to feel... 'Ahhhh!' O’Neill suddenly screamed as he hugged himself while his eyes welled with tears as his body was seized by a completely random burst of pain from the top of his head to the tips of his toes."


• Irony (A kinda-sorta IC - No Gas!), by BF110C4 (COMPLETE!): "Jodie knew irony when it hit her in the face."


• Love in Few Words (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Daria sat on the edge of the bed she had shared with her husband for three and a half years, reading the last note he had ever written for her over and over again."


• The Mageborn Cynic, by peetz5050 (parts 12 and 13): "Jane sat and buttered some toast for herself. She took a swallow of tea to moisten her mouth and began. 'I have a confession to make to you... in some ways I'm no better than the Upstart Ruttheimer. It was no accident that I spoke to you in class yesterday, my Father put me up to it...'" (Part 13)


• Misery Machine, by NightGoblyn (part 3): "'How about something about overcoming adversity?' Stacy asked, turning back to the blank canvas. 'Achieving your dreams, I dunno. How's that sound?' 'Hm,' Jane said, also turning to look at the canvas. 'That could work. We could . . . .' 'How about Sandi Griffin is a total bitch?'"


• On The Road with Julia and Quinn (LLH Mini), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "That led to several more weeks of constant requests of rides for a litany of purposes – and soon afterward, 'Legion Transportation Services' made its debut."


• Sailor Daria (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by BF110C4 (COMPLETE!): "Daria had this weird look, between annoyed and resigned, just as if she was forced into double family time. 'Jane, why don’t you run outside until I dealt with this pest?'"



• Sexy Daria: Lab Lockdown Sex, by Shiva (part 2): "As soon as she stepped through the door she saw something that perked her right back up. 'Looks like the little dominos are falling along quite nicely,' Daria thought with glee, 'And it only took a minimum of effort, god these people are too easy!'"


• This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things (LLH Mini), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Amorette’s smile widened as Daria’s head dropped in shame. 'It’s not like that’s the only time you’ve been – anxious – when it came to guys, right?' A glare of annoyance washed over Amorette as Daria lifted her head. 'I suppose you and yours are a bit more controlled.' 'Here? Hardly.'"


• Undying Love, by BrownEyedBagel (part 11): "She mused on how strange it really was to be holding a literal part of yourself in your hand; knowing that its destruction meant your own. She recalled on how they just about tore Lawndale apart juggling the possibility that they had forged part of Jane into something else; some random object somewhere else in town. A very uncomfortable six months."


• Unexpected Hookup: Underneath It All, by Shiva (part 4): "Daria opened her mouth to speak but her mother said, 'Please Daria I have something to say first, then you can yell at me.' Daria shut her trap and her eyes betrayed her surprise at that last, this wasn’t like her mother at all."


• Upchuck's Sex Bomb! (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Charles Ruttheimer the Third, otherwise known as 'Upchuck' to everyone smiled fiendishly at the thought of his latest plan to get those feisty ladies of Lawndale to truly appreciate him."


• A Vision of Other Possibilities (LLH Mini), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Okay, let’s get started,' a tall, unusually slender young man spoke, looking over the gathered cadets. 'The year’s first meeting of the "Unusual Twists Club" is called to order. Rachel-Renee - thanks for making sweet tea. Derek, Sam – likewise, for scaring up snacks.'"

Wait Until You See Her Ultra Cola Cans Masterpiece!

Happy birthday to the late artist Andy Warhol, born in this day in 1928. Warhol was known for his pop art, including the Marilyn Diptych, which is parodied in the alter ego on the right.

Today is also the anniversary of the first use of the electric chair in 1890. Ms. Li--or at least the Ms. Li from Daria's dream in "Murder, She Snored"--is a big fan of the device. Daria, on the other hand, would prefer to ban capital punishment and bring back torture instead.

Fandom News!

• Check out the discussion (and latest pictures) about NASA's Curiosity rover.


• MTV has linked to the Daria Wiki! Check out the linked article in the thread.


• Talk about good shows with bad endings in a new Weapons of Mass Distraction thread.


• Who would win in a fight between Captain Planet and Mark Trail?

Atomic Communists from Mars!

Happy anniversary to the episode "The Lawndale File," which first aired on this day in 1999. In addition to the classic alien love goddesses image over there, this episode gave us Trent's hell music as well as the return of Artie, which no one demanded but we got it all the same.

Fanfic Update!

• Adventures of Tommy Sherman I (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'The Reichstag fire is exactly what we have been waiting for,' said Hitler. 'With this as a pretext we can wait who the hell is that?'"


• At the Crossroads...(Chapter 13), by oni (part 2): "'So what are Tweedledee and Tweedledom doing for the holidays,' asked Daria hours later in a booth at the Pizza King. Daria and Jane were seated on one side of the booth while the girlfriends were seated on the other side; Quinn was in a chair at the end that she grabbed from an empty table."


• Baby Bumps (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Everywhere in Lawndale High the latest trend was making waves, and that trend just happened to be... Baby Bumps!"


• The Creepyling Chronicles, by Charles RB (part 2): "Daria had insisted - when wearing a paboose to carry Mafalda at the shops, he should have the infant facing him."


• The Eleventh Hour (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Two bodies writhed and twisted on the narrow dorm bed, their breathing fast and uneven as they raced toward climax."


• The Hearts Within, by neonhomer (part 9): "'So, when did you want to get together?' 'We can do something this weekend.' I said. 'Sounds like a plan.' He said. 'Just one thing.' 'Let me guess, no Jane.' I said. Tom hesitated. 'Yeah.'"


• Into the Black, Into the Blue (Chapter 2), by Lord Yellowtail (part 5): "Even in the dim light cast by the intersection’s one working streetlamp, the man’s features were unmistakable. Tall, thin, solid black punk-inspired ensemble and matching duster. Years of experience and training make sure Billy doesn’t miss the thickly muscled, deadly body underneath. Black-painted fingernails, ghost-white hair combed straight back, and a self-satisfied smirk under glittering eyes."



• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin’s Genie (Chapter 8), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Daria, Stacy and Trent arrived back at the Lane’s house. 'We need to hurry our search,' Daria said. 'The black and white isn’t that bad,' Trent said. 'It is bad!' Stacy said as she opened the front door. 'You’re talking about this black and white?' Jane asked from the living room. 'Yes.' 'Then we do need to find the emerald as quickly as possible. An artist needs color!'"


• The Next Gen of Sloanes (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Gotta let my big green eyes shine,' Tommy had thought to himself that morning, willing to endure itchy eyes to avoid wearing his glasses, he hated those things! They made him look like such a nerd!"


• Of Another Man's Guitar, by peapotmaster (part 3): "BRIAN: What kind of sick minds would watch this garbage? STEWIE: I love the part where they maimed Scrappy Doo. BRIAN: I stand corrected."


• Out of the Frying Pan (Pictures), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "As a cruel reward for her intelligence, Daria was promoted to assistant manager after just four months. The new job meant marginally more pay but much more responsibility. It meant dealing with stupid customers, and angry customers - who were usually one and the same."


• A Resentful Cynic Ch.4 : Revenge of the Malled, by ST91 (part 7): "A smile appeared on Andrea's face as she walked toward her friend’s house; no one had noticed the exchange of bags and this would give her an excuse to talk with Jane without Daria suspecting something."


• Runaway Daria: Fallout Lawndale Edition, by Vukodlak (part 8): "One guy caught her eye, he obviously bathed regularly easily every week or more, that plus his clean-cut hair, military grade body armor and shiny clean submachine gun told her he came from money."



• Sexy Daria: Lab Lockdown Sex, by Shiva (part 1): "'Skylar sweetie,' Daria said through clenched teeth and a painted smile, 'Your parents are nice and all but how do you put up with these parties?' 'I grit my teeth and bare it.' Skylar replied through his own gritted teeth."


• Sorry, Marvel (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'FOR FREEDOM!'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "'I did it. I kissed your girlfriend.'" (Continued by breitasparrow)


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "GothicRainbow: Hey, been away for awhile. Just curious to see how the fandom has changed since I was gone."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "'Why did we have to come HERE though? I thought you swore never to set foot in this town again.' The pre-teen girl on the other side of the child seat spoke up then. 'Yeah Mom, I heard you describe Lawndale as the absolute arsehole of nowhereville and you wouldn't be caught dead in it!'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by Ranger Thorne (incomplete plot bunny): "As Jane approached the school, the usual mental cursing was cut short as she noticed the long black car pull into the curved drive at the front of Lawndale High. The driver was exposed to the weather, while the passengers were covered by a cloth top, which was also black. Is that a Packard? she asked herself. As she approached, however, all thought about the car faded."


• The Waif and the Pedo'Neill (IC: Sleeping With Strangers (But Not Like That!)), by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "He looked down at his naked body and raised his eyebrows. 'Oh, my!' he whispered, and blinked as he struggled to remember if he might have actually gone out, and found a one-night stand."


• You Know My Name (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'I thought we could later discuss my plans for the evening,' he said in a faux-husky voice. 'So not my plans.' He smiled. It didn't look right. 'Let's not play games here.'"


• ZOMG and the Gupty's (Scenes no Daria fanfic should ever have: Trip Cyclone), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Hey sis, do you know what ZOMG means?' 'ZOMG?' Tricia repeated in confusion... 'No I have no idea what that means, did you try the dictionary?'"

This Time They Used Extra Vaseline!

Happy National Watermelon Day! Billy, Bobby, and Benjy are celebrating the holiday with the greased variety, but feel free to go with a more traditional route for this one.

Today is also the anniversary of the episode "Write Where It Hurts" in 1998. Daria struggles with writer's block and makes her mother cry...but not for the reasons you'd think.

Fandom News!

• Who would you choose for your shoulder angels and devils?


• What is the worst album from your favorite band? Talk about it in the thread.


• Erin M. appears in a fan appreciation video for That Guy With The Glasses.


• Talk about CE Forman's Fireworks and Crazy Nutso's fanfics in the Golden Oldies forum.

What Does the "M" Stand for, Again?

Today is the anniversary of MTV's debut in 1981, which is really only noteworthy because of the connection to Daria. And considering how they tended to treat the show, I'm not even sure it counts! Still, in 2001 (MTV's 20th anniversary) there were a number of relevant Daria references in the media. So there's that.

Fanfic Update!

• The 180 Degree Turn Ch. 1: New Page, but Same Book, by Walter Kovacs (COMPLETE!): "'Oh? How are these neighbors?' asked Kay, who was both curious about the neighbors and pleased that Elsie actually gave a halfway decent answer to her family meeting questions for once. 'They actually seem like decent people and are a family that is functional. That's pretty rare here in Lawndale' replied Elsie."


• Armored Cynic Daria, Episode 2: The 8th Circuit, by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "LI: I really don't understand what this constant sarcasm is supposed to be in aid of. Especially when I'm the only one who can get you out of here. DARIA: Gonna let me borrow a nail file? LI: I'm here to offer you a job. DARIA: What?"


• Chunky Monkey (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "They heard the car approach before they saw it, and they saw the sparks and smoke first before the car since it was scrapping the pavement since there was some sort of large thing inside it..."


• Daria & Son 3: Freakin' Friends Redux, by Erin M. (part 2): "THAD: Mark? Buddy? You okay? Mark doesn't respond. Thad frowns and shakes Mark by the shoulders. THAD: Mark? Mark looks up, but not at Thad and then in a very familiar tone of voice... MARK: I gotta go."


• Daria & Veronica (Iron Chef: Fresh takes on Veronica Morgendorffer), by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Daria was seven years old and she was being babysat in her home by her aunt Amy because her parents, Jake and Helen, had to bring little Quinn to the doctor. Amy asked her niece, 'Daria I have to go to the bathroom, can you look after Veronica for a few minutes?'"


• Dylan, by J-D (part 7a): "'I seem to be alone, Mr Storch, as usual. That’s okay, though, I can still do the assignment. I work just fine by myself.' Dylan dropped his voice. 'In fact I prefer it—and so does everybody else.'"


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 9 Soaking Up Summer, by Shiva (part 7): "Daria’s smile just grew bigger and bigger as her Mother rushed out of the room to get her cellphone off the charger. Quinn wouldn’t know what hit her."


• Evicted (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by breitasparrow (parts 1 and 2): "He walked up to a lady wearing a black skirt and green jacket under her Wal-Mart apron and gently tugged on her skirt to get her attention. The lady turned around. 'Can I help you with anything, sir?' she said in her signature deadpan tone. 'Oh my god,' Stan said. 'It is you!'" (Part 2)



• Getting Acclimated, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Attention STUdents!' the older man said with his right eyeball bulging out at random, 'We have two NEW additions to the class, and since they're from GROVE Hills it is my SINcere hope that they are a CUT ABOVE the rest of you lazy SLACkers.'"


• The Hunter Home from the Hill, by DeacBlue (parts 15 and 16): "Helen sat still, her jaw almost literally dropping. Finally, she got control of herself. 'To say that what you've told me is fantastic is an understatement of epic proportions.' She shook her head. 'Your body language tells me that you're speaking the truth, but I've been fooled before. Not often,' she said with a grin." (Part 16)


• Ignominious Minds (Iron Chef: Those Who Didn't, Teach), by ticknart (COMPLETE!): "The first period class was reading The Red Badge of Courage. She skimmed the notes and sighed. The man had actually written for her to mention the Cowardly Lion. 'Of all the schools in all the counties I could have been a sub at, it had to be this one,' she said."


• Immackulate Conception (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Push! Push! I can see the head! It's...' The doctor fell silent."


• Immortal Blood, by Shiva (part 9): "Once the lad’s eyes were firmly shut, the ancient being felt the power swell within him and his mind filled with the image of where he wanted to take them both. Skylar knew only an instance of fear as the entire universe seemed to fall apart and then come back together before Felix said, 'Open your eyes Skylar.' As soon as he did so, his pupil’s dilated with shock, he wasn’t in his room anymore."


• Now Trending (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Quinn sat in the Morgendorffer living room. They suddenly looked up from their respective activities (makeup and Sick, Sad World), expressions that of extreme shock."



• Pictures, by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'We've taken our pictures every year,' Helen said. 'Trust me, thirty years from now you're going to look back on these pictures with great fondness.' 'Hardly,' Daria said."


• Pope Darius I (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Yes, I accept.' he chirped, his voice quite unchanged over the years even as his face and in fact his entire being had transformed so profoundly over the decades to the point that those who had known him wouldn't recognize him now."


• A Resentful Cynic Ch.4 : Revenge of the Malled, by ST91 (part 6): "Jodie said, 'I'm fine, thanks Charles. I'm sorry to bother you while you're eating, Daria...' 'Don’t worry, I've almost finished.' Daria said, putting aside her pizza. 'Thanks, I just wanted to ask you if your offer is still valid.'"


• Sam and Link's Freshman Year (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Sam then slowed down so Link could catch up and just when they came in sight of Lawndale High they both stopped dead in their tracks. Link took a very deep breath and then with great deliberation slowly moved his hand and held it out, Sam took it into his own and smiled with pride and just a touch of fear."


• Unexpected Hookup: Underneath It All, by Shiva (part 3): "'I wonder what horrors await,' Daria said in mocking sing-song, 'Besides the mystery meat.' 'But that meat can’t be beat for a special treat!' Jane sang right along, making words up on the spot. Ronnie just laughed and said, 'You guys are the best kind of weird.'"


• Vroom Vroom (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Embrace the Madness), by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): "'Vroooom vroooom!' vroomed Principal Li, racing the toy Harley up and down her desk."