Nice Sweater Vest, Jesse!

Jesse's adding "Fore" to "Yeah" and "Cool" in his four-letter-word vocabulary because today is Tiger Woods's birthday! I hope Jake gets a chance to hit the course today to celebrate, because he deserves every chance to relax he can get.

Don't tell Jake about this one, but it's also Bacon Day. Just let him play golf and let his cholesterol stay right where it is, okay?

Fanfic Update!

• Are We Crazy Yet?, by Lexarius (part 3): "'Sure, Dad.' Daria held her cell phone between her shoulder and head, as she hung another few t-shirts in her walk-in closet."


• Daria Enrolls at Nevermore: an experiment, by Meester_Lee (parts 6 and 7): "The three women from Georgetown accompanied Principal Weems and Miss Rosewood to a small dining room." (Part 7)


• The Greatest Liar in Lawndale or, The Process of Stultification, by SPEEDCOREIDOLATER (COMPLETE!): "'...Brittany Taylor!' The sound of applause. 'Britt!' 'Britt!'"


• The Village (Scenes no Daria fanfic Should Have: How did We survive?), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Daria wasn't sure why she and Jane had decided to befriend the girl with the Swedish accent when they first got to Boston for their college years, but Ulla was so fascinating with her blond locks and her blue eyes and her knife collection and knowledge of pagan and occultic lore."

Lights! Camera! Humiliate!

Daria and Jane are about to immortalize you for National Short Film Day, so make sure they get your best side! (I know, they're both good.) Tom will likely refuse to participate, ever since his last film on Jane-Cam went viral.

Today is also National Tim Day, but I hope Mr. O'Neill doesn't expect people to celebrate it. I mean, if he can't remember anyone else's name half the time then why should they remember his? Fair's fair.

Fandom News!

• Talk about TV shows that got rebooted more than once.

Maybe Daria is Part Cat!

Instead of either shopping or punching people, Daria has elected to spend Boxing Day by boxing...herself. Gotta say, of the three options this one sounds the most appealing to me, too. Throw in a good book and I'm set for the whole day!

This is also the first day of Kwanzaa, which the Gupty family...might...celebrate? Based on their owning a copy of Kaneesha's First Kwanzaa, anyway. With that group, I can't even guess.

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Enrolls at Nevermore, by Meester_Lee (part 5): "Alder led Hopgood and the three women from Georgetown inside, leaving the cabbie in the small dining room that remained open after the end of Nevermore’s school year."


• My Week At Lily's, by radiofox (part 1): "Lilith sat down on her double sized bed and scooped her phone into her nimble palm. She swiftly gripped the black iPhone and flopped onto the bed."


• Song From An American Movie, by ladyevil (part 6): "Daria found herself on a stage in front of a muddled crowd of faceless people. Great, I’m having that nightmare about being naked in public again."


• The Youngest Barksdale, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 5): "First class was Language Arts. 'And so, in The Sound and the Fury, Faulkner give us a veritable kaleidoscope of P.O.V.s -- points of view. Of course, the title itself is from Shakespeare. Can anyone tell me which of the Bard's tragedies?'"

The Clock is Ticking!

I see the Fashion Club is out in force for Last-Minute Shopper's Day, but as far as they're concerned it's always the right minute to shop. However, I think Quinn just made the mistake of telling them that, as it's also Christmas Eve, the point of the holiday is to shop for other people. Oops.

Today is also National Egg Nog Day, but be sure to check the date on the drink before you partake. The last thing you want to do is hallucinate a bunch of holidays escaped from Holiday Island.

Fandom News!

• What are your favorite Britcoms?


• Share your thoughts on Jane in college.

"Sister, nuke the frozen bagel."

Looks like poor Helen just found out that no one wants to try her baking, even on National Date Nut Bread Day. Maybe if she'd ever shown any kind of aptitude at baking, we'd be more open to giving it a shot. As it is, I'd just as soon eat Jake's Kitchen Sink Stew.

Today is also National Short Person Day, and as both Daria and yours truly are the same height--five foot two inches--I hope everyone in fandom remembers to appreciate the little guys!

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Enrolls At Nevermore: An Experiment, by Meester_Lee (parts 3 and 4): "'Sirius!' said Harry. 'It’s good to talk to you!' He’d had trouble getting in touch with Sirius for the last several days. He’d been on missions for the Order and usually left his magical mirror behind." (Part 4)


• Her Last Words, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (part 51): "At first, a curious Anna Felicia just waited for her mother to speak to her from the other side of the world."

Know Any Singing Games?

Sir Mack is inviting anyone who's interested to join him in a game of poker for Games Day. I bet the Future Morgendorffers will take him up on it, but Present Jake might not--between Monopoly and Scrabble, he really doesn't do well with games.

This is also Go Caroling Day, but I think I'll pass. You haven't heard my singing voice (or lack thereof). Considering what we heard of much of the Daria characters in "Daria!" I think they might want to sit this one out, too.

Fandom News!

• wacokid shares his quasi-serious Christmas playlist.


• What are your thoughts on AI art/text generators?

Hanukkah Sameach!

Trent's revealing his previously-unknown Jewish roots in time for Hanukkah, which begins tonight at sunset! You know, Trent as a rabbi actually makes more sense when you realize the holidays begin in the evening rather than the morning. "The night holds the key."

Today is also Bake Cookies Day and, don't worry, Rita. The chocolate chips are already in them. Just try to remember to turn the oven on, okay?

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Enrolls At Nevermore: An Experiment, by Meester_Lee (part 1): "'So when is the last day of classes for you and Quinn?' asked Helen." (Part 2)


• Her Last Words, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (part 50): "At first, Ellie did not have to act anything, since she was quite shocked and surprised for real."


• Sometimes Life Just Repeats... (Scenes no Daria fanfic Should Have: How did We survive?), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'So, kids,' Daria said to her children as she drove on the road, 'I know that it's difficult to adjust to a new town and a new school, but...'"


• The Youngest Barksdale (Iron Chef: Daria The Youngest Barksdale), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 4): "Daria arrived at Lawndale High the second time to find Scarlett waiting for her. 'Scarlett?'"

Chocolate-Covered Regency Pastiches?

I absolutely respect Mrs. Johanssen's commitment to National Chocolate Covered Anything Day, but I think she'd be happier eating something covered in chocolate rather than being something covered in chocolate. I suppose this way is better for her health, though. Assuming she's able to breathe in there.

This is also the anniversary of Jane Austen's birth in 1775, and we'll join Austen-style Daria in wishing her the best of every promise with which the world offers up each gentle day. Whatever that means.

Watch Out For Vicious Dogs!

Awww, look how happy Mr. DeMartino is for National Postal Worker Day! You can tell this was a wise career change because he has such a big smile on his face. He was never this happy when he had to teach Kevin. Good for you, Mr. DeMartino!

Today is also Monkey Day, so let's all give a big hand to Charles Darwin for always letting Curious George get away with his shenanigans.

Fanfic Update!

• Daria and Quinn Morgendorffer, by kllngjk2 (COMPLETE!): "June 3, 2023. Tonight, Daria Morgendorffer and her sister Quinn are going to Lawndale Metrodome stadium to see a Florence + the Machine concert."


• Daria Ravenclaw: The Legend of Sporting Joe, by Meester_Lee (part 10): "Daria dialed Farrah’s number and waited for someone to pick up. Was Farrah there? Would she answer? Would she be willing to talk to her, or would she just blow her off? She waited, hoping for the best while fearing the worst."

The Price is...Cool.

Let's join Jesse in wishing Bob Barker a happy 99th (!) birthday. Or at least that's as close as I'll guess and hopefully not go over. Incidentally, can you imagine Jesse as any kind of game show host? The small talk with contestants would be cringeworthy.

This is also National Ding-a-Ling Day, and Daria's favorite ding-a-ling Kevin is probably going to ask Mack to ring his little ice cream truck bell.

And then he will immediately regret it.

Fandom News!

• Discuss the show Wednesday on Netflix.

The Customer is Often Wrong

Hang in there, Theresa! If the Fashion Club is trying your patience, just remind them that it's National Salesperson Day and I'm sure they'll start treating you with the same respect they give everyone else. Which is zero.

Today is also National Corey Day, so today is your day, Corey! Get out there and ask Quinn out! And then she'll laugh in your face and go back to tormenting Theresa!

Hey, maybe Corey should just ask Theresa out. Could be a perfect match, right?

Fanfic Update!

• Daria Ravenclaw: The Legend of Sporting Joe, by Meester_Lee (part 9): "'That’s a problem,' said Daria. She sighed and returned to her Dad’s office. Her Dad was talking with one of his bosses when she came back."


• Daria s big wedding, by ludma (COMPLETE!): "Big dining hall. Classical music on air. Big wedding."


• Her Last Words, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (part 49): "It took a good time of wandering through the peaceful streets and gardens of the wealthiest area of Grindelwald, a few of the inhabitants threw curious looks at them every now and then and the alpine winds were getting a lot colder, but eventually Anna Coulthard discovered exactly the place that she had been so desperate to find."

Maybe Get Some Earmuffs?

I see Mr. Matthews has already celebrated Take it in the Ear Day, or perhaps one of the canaries celebrated it for him. Regardless, I really think he needs to consider a career change. Before he starts losing more vital parts.

This is also National Christmas Tree Day, so either get out there and cut down an innocent evergreen or pull the artificial one out of storage. I'm still amused that the Morgendorffers store their Christmas tree fully assembled and pre-decorated. That's either lazy or genius or both and I love it.

Fandom News!

• R.I.P., Bob McGrath, Kirstie Alley, and Mills Lane.


• Discuss songs about fakers, wannabes and the likes.

They Have a Miner Problem

Looks like the three J's are taking National Miners Day to new heights...or rather depths. Maybe they're on the hunt for gemstones to impress Quinn? If so, I hope for their sakes that they bathe before they present them to her. Unless all they want to hear is a loud "EWWWWW!!!"

Today is also the anniversary of the Altamont Free Concert in 1969. It may have ended tragically, but at least Jake got a full refund. Somehow.

Fanfic Update!

• A's fifteen minutes of shame, by ludma (COMPLETE!): "The coolest girl on the planet is in my class. She 's got a psychic who's pretty cool too, but she's bad ass."


• The nap police, by ludma (COMPLETE!): "My best friend Daria, in our favorite pizza place! Thinner ans paler, but still alive!"


• Reborn: The Origin Story Of Burnout Girl, by radiofox (part 7): "You won't believe what happened yesterday! So, I was walking home from the skatepark when some strange ghost woman appeared in front of me."


• The wheel of torture, by ludma (COMPLETE!): "Here we are, at this stupid medieval fair, trying to escape to Upchuck, once more."

Mmm...Sock Cookies....

I don't think either Jane or Daria is particularly enjoying National Sock Day, but I guess that's not too surprising. Considering the sock came from the laundry room, I don't imagine that it smells very pleasant.

Today is also National Cookie Day, and Daria wants everyone to know she baked enough for everyone! They're shaped like hearts!

Fandom News!

• RIP, Christine McVie and Clarence Gilyard.


• What do you think about San Francisco's plan to allow police robots to use deadly force?


• Discuss the infamous Kanye interview.


• Vote in the deathmatch poll between Wednesday Addams and Micheal Westen.

Let's See That Jump Shot, Lane!

I have to say, if Jane ever wanted to participate in Play Basketball Day (not that she would, since she isn't a joiner and hates manufactured holidays), then playing as a member of the Harlem Globetrotters is absolutely the way she'd do it. I suspect Mack will sit this one out, lest anyone tease him about his middle name.

This is also World Computer Literacy Day, so ask "one of the cuter technical types" to teach you how to set up a website or go viral on social media or even just get logged into your e-mail. All depends on your current level of expertise.

Fanfic Update!

• And Sandi Makes Three, by WildDogJJ (COMPLETE!): "Tom Sloane was seated at his ornately decorated desk going over his paperwork. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Tom looked up." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Are We Crazy Yet?, by Lexarius (part 2): "'Uncle Fester, you have to stay!' Gomez Addams exclaimed, 'The whole family must welcome our new guest. We must make a good first impression!'"


• Hair Dye, by ah_shit (COMPLETE!): "Quinn walked into Daria's room holding a phone. 'It's your weird friend,' was all she said as she dropped the phone on her sisters bed."


• Her Last Words, by Sheila Wisz Ellayn (part 48): "Anna just blinked as the awful Dark Star dungeon vanished in her flash of white light, for a timeless instant there was nothing and then reality came back all around her in the form of a wild, vast and dazzling landscape of unspeakable beauty."