And Yet, When I Hear Her Name, I Still Think of Chocolates

Today is the traditional date when Lady Godiva went riding bareback (and bare everything else). Helen Morgendorffer here re-enacts that historic moment. Wait a minute, she's blonde now! Why didn't I notice that last year? Oh, forget it.

My joke here last year was, "She's barely legal!" If you have a better joke about Helen than than, put it in Comments. At least we can say we've seen her in her legal briefs. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Can't use that one! And I know some places refer to lawyers as solicitors, but this is ridiculous! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! I love myself.

What's in the fandom news section of the paper today.... oh, the Midwest Dariacon at Kristen and Bryan's place is still tentatively set for around Labor Day.

Notorious grammar raconteur "smk" is offering free writing lessons on PPMB for anyone who speaks English and anyone who thinks they speak English. This offer apparently stems from a few nightmarish experiences while beta-reading fanfics.



FF.net

• And Then Daria and Jane Kissed, by Smileyfax (Part 1): They watched the awkward-looking redhead continue to make a fool of himself some more. "What else would we do?" Jane asked. "There're only so many UFO conventions a year, you know." Daria thought about it. "I don't know. I'm sure we can find ways to keep ourselves occupied." Jane nodded, then smiled. "We could always make out."
• Sinspiration, by Vlora (Part 15): With this horrible resolution in mind, Trent and Daria went back to Trent’s hovel and began working at their music once more. Daria was thankful that Trent seemed to be working at a faster pace than usual. He still seemed to have issues with the idea of a deadline, but he had offered this time—and, with only a few weeks left till she was 18 and Trent needed the music done, he had pulled himself together.

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• Cold Comfort, by Doggieboy (Part 6): Daria reached the top of the hill several minutes after leaving the sheriff behind. She bent over slightly, her hands on her knees, as she panted in the now-steady rainfall. Her breaths came out in white vapors and goose-bumps dotted her forearms. She looked around as she rested and saw an oil pump in the distance. Beyond that she saw some sheds and what looked like a large oil tank of some sort. The woman finally took off at a jog towards the oil company equipment.
• Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Chapter 4, Part 4): The Gotham east side got cold at night, when the sun went down and the wind started blowing off the Atlantic. More so on the rooftops, most of which are barren and open to the cutting knife of the wind. The moon was obscured behind the thin, scudding clouds, almost like it couldn’t stand to look down on Gotham. Sometimes, I know exactly how it feels, Batgirl thought.
  
• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Have: TGIF), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane walked into Ms. Li's office. They had been called out of Mr. O'Neill's class over the intercom and they entered the room with a mixture of dread and relief - it got them out of a test. "Ms. Morgendorffer, Ms. Lane," said Principal Li, "this is a new student at Lawndale High and I want you to introduce her to everybody. I wanted her to be treated very nicely." "Hi!" said the blonde girl. "My name's Luann! Luann DeGroot!"
  

We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties. Please Stand By.

The very first Indianapolis 500 was held on this day a mere 98 years ago. Cool as it was, it was not cooler than the Kentucky Derby, however. (Sorry, little bit of local-city rivalry creeping in there.) At right we see Trent's unsuccessful attempt to duplicate that historic event.

FF.net

• Omega Omega, by Smileyfax (Part 6): "Lucy, I'm home!" Jane cried out with a faux-Cuban accent. "You got some 'splainin to do!" "Jane..." Jane turned at the voice. "Penny?"

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• Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Chapter 4, Part 3): Jane grabbed another slice of pizza and shook her head. “Can she get away with that? Isn’t there something in the Constitution about freedom of the press? I clearly remember DeMartino talking about it last year.” “It’s her press,” Quinn answered. “She has final say over what it prints. It’s not fair, but I don’t think there’s anything we can do about it.”
• Regifted, by Ajar (Part 3): Jane leaned against the lockers in the usual hallway in the usual fashion, ignoring the usual people, but something was certainly amiss. This day is going to go incredibly slowly. At least with Daria I had someone intelligent to talk to. Darn it if she didn't just brighten up the day with her pessimism. “Hi, Jane,” Brittany said. “Umm... where's Daria?” “Daria doesn't go here anymore,” Jane said. “Ms. Li basically forced her out.”
• Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (COMPLETE!): Evgenia, the palace antiquities curator, found herself invisibly bound hand and foot, her clothes scattered on the tessellated travertine and marble floor and an angry Daria standing over her holding the Respighest, fully charged and rippling moires of crackling energy.
  
• Unnamed story (Dead Like Me crossover), by Pinkminx (Part 3): Daria sighed. She hated to admit it, but it was cool watching herself being torn apart and put back together, although she found it depressing that the first man to see her fully undressed was the one that was readying her for burial. One thought resonated through her mind: Don't try and cop a feel, you old necrophiliac bastard. [Story was started here, then moved here] (FF.net).
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Famous Movie Lines), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine." Daria said sotto voce from behind the bar, as her sister strolled in with a cheery smile, her fashionista friends in tow.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Famous Movie Lines), by Disco 316 (COMPLETE!): Sandi addressed the women gathered around her while Quinn stood silently behind her. "The first rule of Fashion Club is that you do not talk about Fashion Club. The second rule of Fashion Club is you do not talk about Fashion Club."
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Famous Movie Lines), by Gouka Ryuu (COMPLETE!): "But Tom, Tom, Tom!" Daria nearly shouted as the young man who had been making to leave but had stopped and turned to see what her outburst was about. "Tom, if you go, where will I go? What will I do?"
• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Have: TGIF), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): Quinn Morgendorffer walked happily towards the Fashionable Table at the Lawndale High School lunch room. She was wearing a brand new fashionable pair of expensive designer tennis shoes with pink shoelaces and she was looking towards the Three Js fawning all over her. Instead, she saw the Three Js fawning over... Jane Lane.
  

Time Flies When You Don't Have A Clue

It's Saturday morning and I realized that it's been five years since I started "The Last Summer", setting Daria on a new path after "Is It College Yet?" that's grown far beyond what I had anticipated.



She's probably grumbling, "Okay, if it's been five years, why am I still in college?"

Summer Feisty, Summer Not

Upchuck welcomes summertime weather in this image from the Sick, Sad Life Planner CD. If you want the audio portion, click here after you turn up your speakers.

Apparently everyone on the planet has decided to write Daria fanfic, so my update here will take a few minutes to assemble. I can hardly complain. An excess of fanfic is better than the alternative. A little news first:

Roxanne M has started a new PPMB Iron Chef: Famous Movie Lines. See what you can do with that. I remember Richard Lobinske used the line, "Top of the world, ma!" in a fanfic once.

Brandon League's new Iron Chef is called Favorite Aunt Meets Amiga. Three guesses what it's about, and the first two don't count. ("I really admire your fortitude, Jane," Amy gasped.)

Fanfic writer ninetwelve needs help for writer's block.

Looking for Daria crossovers at FF.net to read? Want to post your own? Here's the place!

FF.net

• It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time, by Medea42 (COMPLETE!): [WARNING: This is a Daria/Harry Potter crossover which has been further crossed over with a third story world, the nature of which is too horrible to reveal here. I dare not even post a spoiler. Read it at your own risk! Heh heh heh heh heh...]
• Sinspiration, by Vlora (Part 14): Daria plodded along the Mall of the Millennium, ignoring doo-dads and whozits. It seemed as if there was nothing she could do but walk. She eventually arrived at her ideal location. A smile sprawled out across her face for a split second before dropping back to indifference. Wally’s Watches and Winches. Daria didn’t know why they sold winches and watches in the same store, but she ignored this minor detail and entered the store with barely suppressed disgust at the store’s overpriced and "family-friendly" approach.

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• Daylight: Fallen From Grace: I Should Have Been Home Yesterday, by Disco 316 (Part 6): As the women approached within 25 feet, the smaller man yelled, “Halt, who goes there!” and pointed his sword at the women. The tone of his was intended to be stern, though the intimidating effect was somewhat negated by the higher register and reedy quality of his voice. The redhead at the front of the group replied. “Hi, I’m Quinn, and this is Sandi and Stacy.” She gestured to both in turn. “We’re just passing through on our way to Nitro, so if you don’t mind letting us go through…”
• Gimme Skelter, by TAG (Part 3): It happened so quickly there was no time to shoot or even call out.
• John Lane 40: Starry Eyes Open, by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): "Hello, Tom," a pretty blonde said while stepping past Quinn as if she wasn't there. Uncomfortable and annoyed, he said, "Hi, Melanie." "It's nice to see you out and about like this instead of skulking around the little people." "Ahem," Quinn sharply said.
• Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Chapter 4, Part 2): “So, how’s Stacy?” Charles asked. “How do you think she is?” Quinn answered sadly. The couple stood on the school lawn, shivering slightly in their heavy winter coats and watching the light snow drifting down. “She went from Olympic hopeful to crippled orphan before she graduated high school.”
• Unnamed story (Dead Like Me crossover), by Pinkminx (Part 2): "What do you mean dead? How can I be dead? I'd remember it, I'd have felt it!" [story was started here, then moved here] (FF.net).
  
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Brandon League (COMPLETE!): Daria sat in the room. Hell, it beat standing. [That's the entire fanfic.]
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Doggieboy (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer sat in the room. She waited quietly, though she was not necessarily patient about it. It was hard to be patient when the surrounding rooms had zombies in them.
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): Daria sat in the room. Where the room was at or its contents were irrelevant. The quiet...the quiet was what was important. Inside, there was peace. Rest. Sanity.
  

More shortly. Stay tuned, amigas.

Thursday?

Sorry, under the weather again and forgot to blog.

Um, this is Thursday, right? Okay.

More breaking news to come, once there is any.

The Fire Down Below

Forty-seven years ago today, a small fire began to burn in the abandoned coal mines below Centralia, Pennsylvania. In time this accident created one of the most bizarre and infamous ghost towns in modern history, and later gave birth to the Silent Hill computer game. Could the same thing happen to Lawndale? It has a rock quarry that might have tunnels below the town, but rock is notoriously nonflammable. Still, Daria and Jane can dream....

"A quarter of a million spare tires meant to be used in case of atomic war have caught fire in an underground quarry beneath Lawndale!"

Moar l8r!

L8R: Latest addition to DariaWiki: a new Kentucky county! Thanks, Doggieboy!

Dang, people are writing waaaaaaay too much lately. Jeepers, can you believe this? How am I supposed to keep up with this stuff? Guess I'll give it the old college try....

FF.net

• My Fair Zombie, by Smileyfax (COMPLETE!): "Does this... giant bleeding wound... make me look fat?"

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• Am I Being Served? by Ajar (Part 5): "They replaced the cheese with a tofu-based substitute," said Quinn. "I mean, it's healthy and all, but my Dad's cooking is, like, way better than this, and his cooking has put people in the hospital. And no diet soda. How do you people live?"
  
• Lawndale's Finest: The Dark Knight, by NightGoblyn (Chapter 4, Part 1): Daria stood and watched the video screen, protected from the chill of the cave by a pair of slacks and a turtleneck sweater, both in black. The video had been recovered from one of the parking lot security cameras at the Gotham convention center, and Daria was watching it frame by frame.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: "My braces made me do it"), by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): Sandi sat in her bedroom and pouted. Her teeth ached from the constant pressure of the new braces, and she had several new cuts on the insides of her cheeks and lips where her mouth was adjusting to the new appliance. Her only solace was the new kitten her parents had bought her as a reward for being a brave little girl at the dentist's office. She cuddled the little ball of fur in her lap and smiled down at it. "How about I call you Fluffy? Do you like Fluffy?"
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: "My braces made me do it"), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "I will have to admit that Ms. Jericho and her lawyers have told a compelling story," said Daria. "And certainly, they have done an admirable job of supplying a burden of proof. It is definitely true that on September 2nd, Sandi Griffin assaulted Tori Jericho, beating her about the face for several minutes, breaking her jaw and fracturing her eye socket. The defense has never contested the evidence offered by the prosecution. We have offered no objections for it. However—" Daria took off her glasses "—I would like to remind the jury that nothing matters without context."
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Brandon League (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer sat in the room, surrounded by rabid squirrels with ebola.
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer sat in the room. There was no light. There was no sound, save that of her breathing and the soft sounds of her urine as it dripped over the edge of the metal chair she sat bound to and puddled beneath her.
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer sat in the room. Quinn Morgendorffer sat in the other room. Jake Morgendorffer sat in the office. Helen Morgendorffer sat in the courtroom. Each had only one thought....
  
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer sat in the room. The six foot tall warrior clad from head to toe in a golden metallic shell walked in an stood at attention before her. A single red glow passed back and forth in a black slot where it's eyes should have been. Its synthesized voice uttered a single sentence.
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Medea42 (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer sat in her room. She found it adequate. [That's actually the whole story.]
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Pinkminx (COMPLETE!): As she came to Daria immediately became aware of two things: the rancid smell of stale vomit that infiltrated her nostrils, and the faint burning sensation in her wrists and ankles. (Daria/A Clockwork Orange) (see also here)
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): The room had been designed by generations of Baltimore homicide detectives. Designed, however, is too deliberate a word. Who was the police who first had the insight to put heat at sub-tropical levels? Had the insight underlying this, that the guilty had a tendency towards torpor, been forgotten and rediscovered?
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Vlora (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer sat in the room. The room in question was that of Jane – of course, this wasn’t the important aspect of why she was in the room… Her mind flashed back to Mr. O’Neill (who wasn’t the slightest bit Irish) and his project idea.
  
  

SFMB: Catching up with the other versions....

• Apocalyptic Daria: Brave New World, by Doggieboy (Part 8)
• Cold Comfort, by Doggieboy (Part 3)

Bad Braces! Bad Braces!

Derek has posted a tricky new Iron Chef at PPMB: "My braces made me do it." What crime can a young Sandi Griffin blame on her braces? We'll see.

Undefinedlust has presented his notes and commentary on "Love Is a Series of Burning Sensations" (Act 2) , on PPMB.

FF.net

• Camp Pu, by Smileyfax (Part 2): They reached the cave a little past noon. Whatever fire had caused the smoke Amelia observed earlier had apparently grown in intensity, for even Daria could see the far-off plume now. Seeing it only deepened the pit she felt growing in her stomach all morning. Inside the cave, the counselors took the food and set it up at the cave's rear. (It was less of an actual cave and more of a dent in the hill's surface). For a while, the counselors tried to entertain the kids by having them sing songs and play simple games, but after an hour most of them went outside. Quinn's friend Tracy snickered that the counselors had all gone off to 'do it', but most of the other campers didn't know what that meant. ("Do you know what 'do it' means, Daria?" Amelia had asked. Daria just rolled her eyes).
• Just Friends, by Pinkminx (up to Part 10): "Two minutes," Addie said as she slapped a dollar on the table. "One minute," Quinn added, placing her dollar on top of Addie's. "Forty-five seconds," Jane concluded as she added her own money to the small pile.
• Our Time Now, by Charliefox2012 (Part 5): Another week had passed that Daria was staying with Jane. And it was another week that things were still wrong. Jane’s mood had gotten considerable worse since Daria had gone out with Tom on Saturday. Jane didn’t speak much to Daria, unless she had to. They however, did keep things amicable since Daria still had to stay at her house. Jane was still her friend and didn’t feel right kicking her out. She knew how Quinn could be and even through the misery, a part of Jane still wanted Daria around. Jane honestly didn’t want things to be this way; it wasn’t supposed to be this way. She wanted things back to normal, but now, she didn’t even know what that was anymore.
• Sinspiration, by Vlora (up to Part 13): After a few days, Daria has something worthwhile, her lyrics meaning very little – but they were lyrics none the less. After showing them to Jane, she reworked them again and again, until she felt she could show them to Trent. Without giving much of a thought to the issue at hand (such as her mother and Quinn trying to figure out why Trent had come over and insisted coming in) she went over to Jane’s house. Jane seemed more than happy to see Daria interested in something outside of discussing Tom, especially as it seemed more constructive than anything else.
• Truth or Dare, by Smileyfax (Part 1): "Everyone ready for a hike?" Mr. Potts, the owner of Camp Grizzly, asked the assembled former campers. They were attending their five-year reunion, but most of them seemed rather unenthusiastic -- only muted acceptance for Mr. Potts' call to hike was given up. Skip spoke up. "He said, 'Is everyone ready for a hike?'" Skip was unable to rouse more cheer from the crowd than Mr. Potts was able to, though. "I wish Skip would take a hike," Daria griped. Amelia, a hanger-on from last time Daria had been to the camp, laughed.
• Wristcuttters: A Daria Story, by Charliefox2012 (up to Part 13): They had been driving for a few hours now. Mikal had fallen asleep in the backseat and Eugene had the decency to not speak to Daria as she was still fuming at him. She almost lost a good friend because of Eugene. It made Daria angry. If she didn’t lose things because of herself, then it would be because of someone else, making Daria think of Jane’s boyfriend Tom. Daria was just so tired of losing.

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• Cold Comfort, by Doggieboy (Part 6): The first policeman who made it outside of the Sanders County Justice Building happened to be Deputy Jack, who ran to the street, a .30-06 rifle in his hands and angry look on his face. "I'm gonna blow your ass right off that motorcycle, bitch!" he said as he aimed the rifle at Daria's back. Sheriff Dougherty, however, was right behind him, saw the frozen pedestrians between them and Daria and yelled, "Jack, no! There's people in the way!''
• Expecting Trouble, by Legendeld (Part 8): Quinn held the still hand of Sandi Griffin as the machines hooked up to her friend kept up their constant pattern. She didn’t mind the annoying beeps or even the hissing from the ventilator. Every second the sounds continued meant Sandi was still alive. [Contains adult content. You were warned.]
  
• Unnamed story (Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by Pinkminx (Part 1): A Daria/Dead Like Me crossover: "Forget it. I'm out of here, I just gotta return a book to the library and I'm going home" Daria retrieved a large thick text book from her locker, shut the door, and began to walk toward the library.
• Unnamed story (Second Coming of the New Ideas Thread), by Lorenzo Sauchelli (COMPLETE!): "Friends, Lawndale Lions, countrymen, lend me your ears; I come to bury Daria, not to praise her."
  

Kiss Kiss!

Looks like Daria's puckering up for someone, but she's actually speaking and was caught at a kiss-like moment by the "Print Screen" function.

Still, it does invite comment. Who is Daria about to kiss, and why? Answers in Comments section, please.

Pinkminx would like some assistance with a fanfic she is writing.

PPMB

• Apocalyptic Daria: Brave New World, by Doggieboy (Part 8): The next morning, Daria walked into the dining room and glanced at Helen and Diana as they washed the breakfast dishes. “Why didn’t anyone get me up?” she asked. “I missed breakfast and now I’m hungry.” “We decided to let you sleep today, sweetie,” Helen said as she dried a plate. “After all, yesterday was a full day for both you and Diana.”
• Gimme Skelter, by TAG, greatly aided by Brother Grimace (Prologue to Part 2): In another time and place, college freshman Helen Barksdale and Jake Morgendorffer help make a young man’s dream come true. Unfortunately, the young man is a psychotic cult leader named Charles Manson. The dream that comes true is the apocalyptic nightmare of Helter Skelter. (HTML version)
  
• Legion of Lawndale Heroes Gold Team 1: Coffee Klatch, by Roentgen (Pcart 3): Edmund Stephens and Tom Sloane ordered coffee from the bookstore's barista. They were two old friends that hadn't seen each other in years, and were filling the empty spaces in each other's lives that corresponded to the phrase "whatever happened to…?" The conversation was sprinkled with references that would have baffled an outsider. "So did Mr. Solomon ever figure out who slid that nasty poem under his door during history class?" said Edmund. "No. Which is good, because I was that one what did it," admitted Tom.
• Love Is a Series of Burning Sensations, by Undefinedlust (Part 9): Jane blankly stared at the drink selections for a few moments before realizing she felt dehydrated and grabbed a red sports drink. Moving further down the aisle she pulled a large bottle of Ultra Cola from the cooler before stopping in front of the beer section. With a slight sigh, she grabbed an eighteen pack of Trent's brand and headed for the counter. Seven looked at Jane cautiously. "Trent out of beer?" "Something like that," Jane shrugged. [Contains adult content. You are warned.]
• Smithereens: Sarcasm Dawn, by Wraith (preview): Charles grumbled and rolled over, pulling his pillow over his head. Although the stone-walled room his bed was in was very nicely furnished, it certainly wasn't as quiet as he had been told it was. he commotion only seemed to be getting worse when it was suddenly drowned out by the bell. Bong, bong, bong, pause; bong, bong, bong, pause.
  

A Day to Remember

"You got to help me. Lincoln's going to make me recite the Pledge of Allegiance. Call him off!"

—Memorial Day begs for Daria's help in "Depth Takes a Holiday."


Hope your Memorial Day is going well. Brother Grimace has a story for you.

More later.

It's a Hard Rain's A-Gonna Fall

Singer-songwriter-activist Bob Dylan was born 68 years ago today. Wow. One of his songs was the backbone of this story. I confess I've not been as fond of his later stuff as I was of early albums like Desire, which was awesome. I once had a copy of the stream-of-consciousness novel he wrote, Tarantula, but lost it.

By the way, I used Trent because there are no Bob Dylan alter egos. He could pass for Dylan if you squint a lot in a dark room. Until he plays.

Not many fanfics have much to do with Bob Dylan. Here is an exception.

By the way, I added a bunch of new stories to the last post. Have a look. Great stuff. I love this fandom!

The interviews done last year with some authors and artists have been posted. Enjoy. We'll see what comes up next.

BREAKING NEWS! Richard Lobinske has updated the 2009 Daria Visual Fanworks listing! Hooray!

And now for the fanfic.

FF.net

• Our Time Now, by Charliefox2012 (Part 4): Daria was startled when her door burst open. “Daria! What are you doing in bed when the house is on fire?!” Jake yelled. The sentence didn’t really process for Daria. She sat up and put on her glasses. “Um, trying to find out if these blankets are flame-retardant?” she said. [Author would like some feedback, please help!]
• Sinspiration, by Vlora (up to Part 11!): As Trent arrived home he was met with Jane on the couch eating some kind of instant meal. ‘You’re up early,’ she pointed out, her eyes drifting between her food and the TV periodically, enjoying the laziness of a Saturday more than she could remember. It was probably because she had spent most of the previous night reliving the same feelings she had gotten from Tom when they had broken up – all through Daria. She shouldn’t have let them date, but it seemed as if nothing good would have come out of the situation either way.
• Tales of the Ringbearers: Temporary Duty, by Richard Lobinske (COMPLETE!): Sharon lifted a pair of electronic binoculars and observed the target area 500 meters away. Only her long experience with The Agency prevented her from flinching at the series of loud reports that erupted beside her. Looking down range at the fluttering remains of the target, she said, "Very effective Gunny, though a Ma Deuce isn't exactly what I'd call subtle."

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• Jane Lane: Spider-man, by Lorenzo Sauchelli (Part 2): Jane hurried after the redheaded boy but instead bumped into an African-American girl who was carrying a box full of photographic equipment. Jane tried in vain to catch the box before it hit the floor but couldn't get there in time and instead got the other girl to fall too. “Uh, sorry. Did you see a guy go by here?
• Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): "Whose idea was this? I try to stay under the radar, run a profitable investigation agency and avoid fools and incompetents whenever possible. But, lately, somehow, I've become a magnet attracting deranged and idiotic creatures of great wealth."
  
• Things Fall Apart, by Doggieboy (Part 14): After the Ringbearers restored a semblance of order to the chaos at Highland High School, Beavis found himself alone and thinking of Butt-Head. They saved everyone here, but what about Butt-Head? he thought and sniffled.
  
• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Have: TGIF), by Greystar: "Daria, how can you have anything bad to say about a school trip to Europe of all places?" Jane asked her best friend as they walked to school. "We're going on a zeppelin, Jane." Daria scowled. "The last one of those that ran for passenger service crashed in 1937, in case you don't remember. I've got a picture of it in my locker."
  

Saturday. Not thinking yet.

Whoa, not ready to type anything yet. Gimme time. It's late. Jeepers.

Go to Comments and discuss something. Be back inna minute.

Oh, right, right. Today is World Turtle Day. Again. Man, that's just... lame. I had a pet turtle with a little island thing like Barch is on. Plastic pool. Turtle died. Down the toilet. Wake me up later.

LATER: Dang, seem to have missed a lot of stories lately. Sorry!

FF.net

• Daria's New Look, by Stevenie Ellis (COMPLETE!): The story has concluded; I think I missed that earlier.
• Just Friends, by Pinkminx (Part 7): It was a typical Thursday night, Daria had locked herself in Jane's spare room and was working on her Literature midterm assignment; a short story depicting societies influence over an original character. Melody Power had been chosen with out any thought and Daria had been vivaciously writing her second adventure. The assignment was due in for marking on Monday.
  
• Loose Fit, by Smileyfax (Part 1?): "And as we share the joy of this lovely young couple, Brian and Erin, we are compelled to ask, what is love?" Daria listened to the priest as he spoke leading up to the exchange of vows and rings between Brian and Erin. The whole process bored her nearly to tears, actually. She reached up and began idly picking at earwax with her pinky.

• Mr. T Meets Daria, by Smileyfax (Part 1): One day, Daria and Jane were walking to school when who should walk up to them but Mr. T! "I'm Mr. T, fools!" he shouted. "Oh my God, it's Mr. T!" Daria and Jane shouted.
• Sinspiration, by Vlora (Part 1): A tinny sound of a television out of tune drifted throughout the house, abandoned and ignored. The Lane house was, once again, void of most human life. The usual tenants were secluded to Trent’s room, playing with paints and twanging a guitar. Very rarely would the two create in the same room, being that they were very ineffective working partners. This was probably owed to accidentally and frequently pointing out the other’s issues or flaws. However, they gave it the good ol’ Lawndale one-two and tried anyway.
• Wristcutters: A Daria Story, by Charliefox2012 (Parts 9 and 10): “Tell me, please, when you were still living, did you ever try to go looking for God?”

PPMB

• Cold Comfort, by Doggieboy (Parts 4 and 5): “Hey, amiga!” Jane said and smiled when Daria hugged her tightly. The taller woman felt her best friend’s back and shoulders and added, “Wow! Those are some muscles you have there.” Daria blushed and looked away briefly. “I’ve worked out.” [Lots of action in Part 5!] (SFMB)
  
• Daylight: The Hope Mission, by Brother Grimace (teaser): Two girls and a cup. No, seriously, read it.
• Regifted, by Ajar (Parts 1 and 2): “I never pegged you for a masochist,” commented Daria in typical half-joking fashion. “Believe it or not,” Jodie replied while fiddling with the zipper on her suitcase. “Your parents are the lesser of two evils. If I were riding with my parents they'd've had me joining the sphenisciology club by the time I got there. I can just imagine what kind of weirdos that club has.” [And here we have: Science is everywhere, science is important, please stay in science, the program is shrinking, maybe if I emphasize the importance of science people won't leave. Please don't leave.]
• Size Does Matter, by BlackHole (Part 40): As usual, Coach Gibson used the Monday morning home room period to prepare for the day’s classes: he reviewed the class schedule. Disappointingly, Monday featured only a single senior class. All wimps otherwise. Well, maybe I can make some men out of the bunch. (SFMB)
• Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): With thick welder's gloves, Daria picked up the still smoldering bioferrous chunks and globs that had once been Toki, put them in a bucket and went down to her private work room on a lower level of the palace. Jane followed at a safe distance.
• Unnamed story (Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over) (Daria/2001: A Space Odyssey), by Undefinedlust (comedy, crossover): "Open the pod bay doors, D.A.R.I.A." "I'm sorry Tom, but I'm afraid I can't do that."
• Unnamed story (Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over) (Daria/Beavis and Butt-head/2001: A Space Odyssey), by Doggieboy (comedy, crossover): "Open the pod bay doors, D.A.R.I.A." "I'm sorry, Beavis, I'm afraid I can't do that."
• Unnamed story (Second coming of the New Ideas Thread) (Daria/Scooby-doo), by NightGoblyn (comedy, crossover): "Jinkies, goddamnit."
• Unnamed story (Scenes that Should Be: Brains for Rent), by Greystar (Part 1): The police department sedan pulled up to the large suburban home and came to a stop with a screech of the tires and immediately disgorged two men wearing the ubiquitous dark blue suits that the world had come to identify with police investigators. As the two civil servants showed their I.D.s to the uniformed officer that was controlling access to the house, the detective leading the pair was brought to a halt by a hand on his shoulder. “You’ve got to be kidding, pal,” the officer said with a scowl. “That’s just not a fake, it’s a dumb fake.”

"Elementary, my dear Jane."

And now we come to an extraordinarily relevant holiday: the 150th anniversary of the birth of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, creator of Sherlock Holmes.

This day is important to our fandom and indeed to all media fandoms because Sherlock Holmes was the first major subject of fanfiction and fan clubs in modern times. Loads of people have written about him, professionally and otherwise. Non-canonical works written about him could fill libraries. Fan speculation about him has been rampant since his name first appeared in print. If you think this fandom is loony and overboard, have a good look at Sherlock's. Or, for that matter, Doctor Who's or Harry Potter's or Star Trek's. We're practically boring in comparison.

The difference, of course, is that you can make a ton of money writing about Sherlock Holmes because the copyright on him has expired. He's public domain, and everyone wants him. Daria.... um, well, has somewhat less of a public standing, but at least her copyright is airtight. We write about her for fun, not for profit, which I for one think is a damn good thing. Getting paid for your hobby sucks all the life out of it.

Have there been Daria/Sherlock Holmes crossovers? MMan did one recently, an excellent little tale called "The Adventure of the Chinese Restaurant," but that's the only one. Lots of fanfics use the name "Sherlock" in a derisive manner, and a number have Daria or Jane utter lines like, "Elementary, my dear Watson." And in "Look Back in Annoyance," Jane asks Daria, "Did you mean Holmes like Sherlock or homes like 'Yo, yo, yo, what up, homes?'" Plus, we do have these nice alter egos, the Daria one from the Sick, Sad Life Planner and Kevin from Daria's Inferno. I haven't checked yet for fan art.

Relax and read some Sherlock Holmes today for fun. Think about how great it was that Sherlock Holmes helped make being smart look cool. Daria's right there with him, carrying on the great tradition.

PPMB

• John Lane 40: Starry Eyes Open, by Richard Lobinske (Part 3): "I need real jewelry for the ball, not costume. Even I'm not going to push Mom's gold card that far. I'll have to get a dress that matches the good jewelry I already have." "If you say so," Sandi said. "I really like the color," Stacy said. "I say go with it." "Yeah," Tiffany said. "Nobody wears coral the way you do."
  
• Rings and Things That Cannot Go Together, by Ranger Thorne (continued): The star system was a young one, with a star that was just settling down after coming to light for the first time. Light from it would not reach Earth for thousands of years. A single ring of debris leftover from the star’s formation circled it from just inside the zone where liquid water could exist. A green ball of energy suddenly appeared within the ring and began to draw the contents of the ring to it. A few seconds later a second ball appeared on the far side of the solar system. Within a few minutes almost a dozen were sucking in the contents of the ring.
  

One J at a Time, On Time?

A few days ago I somehow got the idea that the anniversary of "The Story of D" had just come and gone. Except that I was two months off. That happened on March 19th, not May 19th. Sorry.

"One J at a Time" (and I have checked this twice now) was broadcast eight years ago tonight. Must be the flu and the frustration of trying to post on PPMB getting me all screwed up.

More shortly. Interesting that Tom bought Daria a rare book from the Internet. Interesting if after Daria and Tom broke up, she got something else from him that he ordered off the Internet, either before or after the breakup. Very interesting.

PPMB

• Don't Bet on It, Episode V: The Final Chapter. Srsly. by Lawndale Lurker (COMPLETE!): “Jane, be reasonable. I know a little about your financial situation, remember. Your mortgage is due. Your cupboard is bare. The wolf is at the door. The owl is on the roof. You're about one heavy knock on the door away from sleeping under the railroad overpass with the winos. Or becoming your mortgageholder's kept woman. You can't afford to keep going double or nothing like this."

"I pity the fool who touches my gradebook!"

Yes, today is the 57th birthday of that great American legend, Mr. T, represented here on the right by Mr. O'Neill (dressed in something vaguely like Mr. T's A-Team outfit). Irony, oh, the irony.

Question: Did anyone ever do a Daria/Mr. T (B.A. Baracus) crossover? 'Cause that would rule.

More later, still getting over the flu.

MORE NOTES: Plans for a late summer Midwest USA Dariacon are in the works. I pity the fool who doesn't make it there.

MOAR NUZ! A new website has been created to host the five author/artist interviews conducted last year (the "alt.lawndale.creators" batch). So far, only the interviews with MMan and Christ Oliver are up, but the rest are following in short order. Got any comments? Want to see the interviews continued? Let me know. There seems to be a lot of interest on this topic.

Appears to be a malfunction here....

Having a lot of trouble getting into PPMB again. Rats. Well fine, here we are.

I didn't have many other things to note as failures (things I've attempted to create for Daria fandom), but there were some duds. The Daria Fandom Calendar is, I think, a good idea, but I don't know how many people use it. Kristen Bealer and Deref kindly added some fun dates to it, but the main problem here is that it's kinda boring. I can't add pictures or sound bites or anything except short bits of text. Still okay for that. If anyone else wants to contribute funny dates or meaningful anniversaries for the fandom, please let me know.

Not many people probably use the pizza finder under "Virtual Lawndale," but I'm leaving it there anyway.

All in all, not bad. Failure is good. It's the only thing that teaches you anything useful. If LATIFA and the Fan-imation pages were duds, so be it, I'm leaving 'em up anyway, 'cause you never never know when someone will pick it up and run with it. Maybe they were just too soon for their time. I can wait.

There were some projects that turned out better, too. Backgrounders, though I don't hear much about it, seems to have helped character development a little, in general. UU and I have both been dragged off by Real Life issues, but we are going to return and add more stuff soon. Still want to see Shaggy and The Head use their powers in a superhero series like LLH. Maybe they're in the background lurking somewhere...

That F Word, Revisited (Part 2)

Next on our tour of Fail is a mini-website called The Art of Daria Fan-imation. This was started when I got copies of Daria's Inferno and Sick Sad Life Planner, and discovered some of the images, movies, and sound bites could be removed and tinkered with. I had already noticed that famed Daria fan artist SC had developed some mini-cartoons of his own, several derived directly from the CD games. (Remember Daria riding the motorcycle? It's in there.)

After figuring out some ways in which the material could be worked with to produce amusing little movies, I posted everything I had to the Fan-imation site. All free.

And heard nothing more about it.

At this date I have to assume the level of technical expertise required put off most users. At the very least, the movies from DI are fun to watch. You get original animation, original cast voices, and pretty good screen shots like the one above, as Daria falls asleep during Mr. O'Neill's class on Dante.

Maybe someone will create some new animation for us one of these days. I'd do it if I could be cloned.

FF.net

• Daria's New Look, by Stevenie Ellis (Part 3): Daria stands in the middle of Jane’s room, feeling much better now that she’s had a shower and washed her hair. The feeling of wet hair on her neck drove her nuts, so she pulled it into a messy bun on top of her head. Then she pulled on an oversized, paint splattered tee shirt and some boxer shorts Jane had lent her. The bagginess of the outfit made her look even more petite. Still standing in the middle of the room Daria arched her back and stretched her hands toward the ceiling. There were a lot of knots in her neck she would have to work out later.

PPMB

• Boy Hostage, by Undefinedlust (COMPLETE!): Tom regained consciousness and tried to clear the fog from his mind. He realized he was laying down, but was unable to get up. He then tried to move his hands, but they were tightly bound. Looking down he was confused by the fact he was wearing a TV series era Robin suit. He became even more alarmed when he noticed the giant rotary saw blade between his feet.
• Cold Comfort, by Doggieboy (Part 3): Daria's postwar travels take her into backwoods country and into the lives of unfamiliar and unfriendly people.
• Don't Bet On It II (Sequel to the Prequel), by Lawndale Lurker (COMPLETE!): Jane wolfed down another slice of margarined white bread while eying the jock table. “Look at that big goof, telling war stories. The rest of the team eating it up, cheerleaders adoring him; like he was the love child of Bret Favre and Steve Bartkowski.”
• Stacy Rowe, Seeker (Part II), by jtranser (continued): At that moment two shots rang out from Jake's bedroom, followed by the sounds of a struggle, bright flashes and electrical arcing. As they raced toward Jake's room, jumping over the paralyzed bodies of security guards, they could hear him screaming....
• Unnamed story (1,001 Deaths of Tom Sloane—Part II), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): Jane looked around the Sloane kitchen. "I love raiding your kitchen, Tommy boy," she said, putting the finishing touches of a saucer-sized cheeseburger with all the fixings. "What else do you have to go with this?"
• Unnamed story (The Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): Daria sat along in the room and waited. It was more a box than a room, but there was enough space, barely, for her to sit. Suddenly, the entire universe was inside with her: the grand infinity of creation, infinite numbers of stars making infinite numbers of galaxies in a cosmic dance of incomprehensible complexity.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Lying About "The Kiss"), by Dennis (Part 2): “I can’t imagine how I could have hurt Jane more,” Daria said, voice heavy. Her mother, sitting across from her, sighed. “It’s a lousy situation, Daria. Buy you didn’t set out to hurt anyone.” They were seated across from each other in a booth at a bar and grill near her mother’s office called, appropriately enough, The Settlement. [Continued from here.]

That F Word, Revisited (Part 1)

Failure isn't all bad. It's the only way we ever learn about stuff. I was mulling over some Daria projects started here that did not pan out as I had hoped. I don't mean unfinished fanfiction, which will indeed get finished one day. I was thinking of other things, poking around wondering how they could have been made better.

Like LATIFA.

The idea behind Lovestruck Atomic Teenage Invaders from Mars was to set up a silly shared-world background, entirely derived from bits and pieces of official Daria material (suitably mangled), offering Lawndale High as a center for science-fiction and fantasy hijinks of the comic variety. I added something about interstellar berserkers, and that part probably should have been taken out (wasn't funny, sort of irrrelevant to concept), but the rest of the background was to inspire writers to create wacky tales about Daria and Jane and company running amok around the galaxy or wherever the author wished them to go.

LATIFA did not take off like Daylight did. Daylight blew out of here like a Saturn V, but LATIFA did not even leave the runway. Its engines coughed a little, a few passengers got on but then got off, and LATIFA was soon pushed off to the side to make room for faster traffic.

I have pondered on the difference between LATIFA and Daylight. Was comedy less appealing than drama and angst and The End of the World in a Different Way? Or could I have put LATIFA together better, made it more fun and attractive? Not sure. LATIFA is still there and won't be taken down, just in case someone buys a ticket for it. It is hoped that the two webpages about it are at least entertaining. Lots of sound bites. Still wondering how to revive it.

More failures later. Stay tuned.

Pay Attention!

Some news bits for those in Daria fandom-land....

An open invitation has been extended by Kristen Bealer for a Midwest Dariacon, to be held in the indefinite near future. Check and link and report in if you think you can make it.

Roentgen has posted a very funny Daria Fan Fiction Classification Test on PPMB. Enjoy it.

I am working on the author/artist interviews I did a year ago and hope to post them soon. Thanks to everyone who participated.

PPMB

• Unnamed story (Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by Respite (COMPLETE!): "Look here, Princess. We're going to need to set up some ground rules if you're going to intern for me, or whatever they said. First, in the fashion biz, mouths on girls your age aren't for talking, so if you're not going to use it for the reason it's there, just shut it. Second, belly-tees went out about three years ago. Burn it. Third, Ginger was never in. Dye it. Fourth: Did I mention shutting the hell up?"
  
• Unnamed story (Crossovers Not Yet Crossed Over), by Ajar (COMPLETE!): "Now it might look tempting to chose any old people you find to socialize with, but many of them can in fact be toxic for your mental state. These people here are poor candidates. First, they're just walking around, not worrying about anything. This likely means that they are either stuck up, unintelligent, or vapid, all of which are not good for your mental state."
  
• Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Have: TGIF), by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "Your lack of interest in personal interaction makes you an ideal candidate for working with the dead." The words of the career evaluation from high school floated through her mind, and she smiled, appreciating the irony. The quiz had almost nailed it. She worked with the dead and loved every minute of it, but not as a mortician, as a historian. And today her career may have reached its pinnacle.

"Happy Birthday, Mister President..."

Let's see, today is the 47th anniversary of "Happy Birthday, Mister President," a historical footnote later mentioned in a Daria fanfic. Wait....

Okay, this is weird. Using Google, I went through all the stories on Outpost Daria that mention Marilyn Monroe in them, and every single one of them is weird. We're not talking odd, we're talking major league Out There. Well, except for the stories I did, which were pretty mundane compared to the others. Have a look.

• "The Year of the Cynic"
• "Kick Me"
• "Gone"
• "Halloween in Lawndale"
• "And Now—Erin"
• "Safest Emergency"
• "Death Takes a Holliday"
  

You tell me if there's something odd here. Which of these qualifies as crackfic? I think the first one does, for sure. Wow, awesome stuff. Remember this, fans: Do NOT use Marilyn Monroe in your fanfics unless you are going for the Weirdness Award. 'Nuff said.

I keep thinking I've seen fan art of a Daria character dressed up as Marilyn Monroe (not Manson), but I can't find any. Huh.

Lasagna AGAIN?

It's that time of year when the management of the DFB2 (i.e., me) solicits suggestions from its readers (i.e., you) as to what more can be done with this blog. I know it is ephemeral as are all things, but it is a lot of fun and I would like to keep typing in it for a long time to come.

What else do we need that would help the fandom grow? Other than DVDaria, I mean. What else can this blog do for your Daria enjoyment? Drop some notes in Comments. I've gotten a lot of good ideas in the past and have used them. I just want to keep up with things.

Just checked the meter, and we've got over 86,800 hits so far in a year and a half. Cool. Keep it up.

Oh, and MDetector5 put up some great Helen art!

Plus, the 2009 Daria fanfic list was updated!

Musing at the Museum

It's International Museum Day! Hooray! Not sure where I got the image at right, but it's great. How many places in official Daria lore has this museum appeared? I can recall two, myself.

It is also Victoria Day in the distant northern reaches of the Earth, and a mere 99 years ago today the Earth passed through the tail of Halley's Comet. Because of poisonous gas in the tail, everyone died. Or they would have if the poisonous gas had not been so diffuse. Rats. There should be a Daria alternate universe about this event. It would be cool.

QUERY: Which writers do you miss the most from the Good Old Days of this fandom? Click the link and add your thoughts.

More soon.

PPMB

• Rings and Things That Cannot Go Together, by Ranger Thorne (continued): The robotic legions marched over the rise toward the city in the distance. Behind them, the landing craft lifted off to make room for more ships with troops. That more had not, in fact, arrived would have made any truly sentient being worried. But the mechanical troops merely obeyed the orders given: destroy the city of Bleth.
  

Odds and Ends and Dresses That Don't Fit

The Big List o' Daria Fanfic for 2009 has been updated. Have a look at it and see if anything is out of place. I will post corrections as I get them.

I still cannot get over how many responses The Kristen Bealer Guy got to this post. Man. Why can't I think up topics like that?

More shortly. Thinking about some stuff.

PPMB is having some serious issues with errors today. I can't even post on it now, when I could earlier. Dang.

YAY! It's World Information Society Day! YAY!

Yes, once again our secret masters at the United Nations have mandated that we have another holiday on Holiday Island, but this time it is one that is of special interest to us fans. World Information Society Day is here to remind us that the Internet has a big effect on our lives, which seems sort of obvious given that you're reading this right now instead of mowing the lawn as you should be doing. We do have our Daria fandom as a result, however, so maybe this is a good holiday after all. Well done, UN!

Of course, this is all academic when the Internet goes down, your computer gets a virus, etc.

REMINDER: The Sick Sad World website is active! Send in your fanworks ASAP! The instructions for fanfiction are here, and the instructions for fan art are here. Go!

PPMB

• Am I Being Served? by Ajar (Part 4): "What if we let Mrs. Slocombe model the new line of environmentally friendly undergarments? That's sure to turn the whole department green." [I also liked: "If Roger hadn't told me about the principles of Zen I don't know how I could make sense of anything around here."]
• Cold Comfort, by Doggieboy (Part 2): "Colonel Armalin is here to see you, sir." The officer raised his eyebrows. Did I hear her right? "Colonel Armalin?" he asked. "Yes, sir." That's odd. Damned disquieting, too. Very unusual for him to show up unannounced like that. He nodded and said, "Send him in."
• More Strangers, by Waldnorm (Part 1): "So now the Fashion Club is being given a pep rally assembly?! You know, I never thought high school would get any worse." "Ah, amiga, it may just be getting worse. Look outside." [Guess the crossover!]
  

YAY FOR THE FILLY!

I bet you thought I had forgotten about this great alter ego. No, sir! Hooray for Rachel Alexandra, winner of the Preakness! Hooray! Ride 'er, Jake! And enjoy the private celebration in the stall afterward!

Ah, there's nothing like quality family time.

More later, still up too late. PPMB is wonky, having trouble getting into it.

Crying All the Way to the Bank

Ninety years ago today, showman and classical pianist Liberace was born. Mr. DeMartino does a nice impersonation of him at left, tickling the ivories in an MTV alter ego. A lot of alter egos have a musical theme, usually a very specific one. The catchphrase in the title was actually invented by Liberace, who went heavily for the entertainment angle. He was a pretty nice person from most accounts. The artist really worked on this image, didn't he?

Now and then I surf around looking for news stories related to Daria, but almost always the writers mention the show in a peripheral way only. Still, a couple of hits looked interesting. "TV will eat itself" (Guardian (UK)) was one, and "Reality TV Addiction" (The Comment) was another. Daria is well remembered, just not well analyzed or discussed.

PPMB

• Embers, by Undefinedlust (COMPLETE!): My name is Jennifer. They call me burnout girl. Jennifer started to write on the blank first page of a notebook that had already been filled. She was distracted by her mother yelling at her from the kitchen. With a sigh she closed the notebook and placed it on top of a stack of identical spiral bound books on her desk then went into the kitchen. [Contains adult content. You are warned.]
  
• Expecting Trouble, by Legendeld (Part 7): “I’m not prepared to consider bail until we can go a week without the number of victims in this case increasing. Your client admitted to the police that at the time of his arrest he was planning on leaving the city, which makes him a flight risk. So unless your client wants to provide the prosecution a list of the minors he had relations with, he stays in jail.”
  
• Red Hot Monkey Love, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "We haven't made red hot monkey love in a while," said Amanda. "You're right," said Vincent. "I was in Greenland and you were in the Azores. Let's do it now."
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria Is Raven's Apprentice), by Project Pegasus (COMPLETE!): "Stupid term paper." "What are you up to?" "Working on my term paper. I just can't seem to finish it." "Let me see if I can help."
  
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Finish the Story, Your Way), by Paisleygal (COMPLETE!): Daria took one last look at Tommy Sherman. He still had that cocky grin on his face as he watched Brittany’s retreating form and rubbed the red spot on his cheek. Daria saw him pause as if he was trying to think of something to say. “Don’t think to hard, you might strain something,” she thought as Tommy took a half step forward... and collapsed to the floor.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: 'Shipper Ficlets!), by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE FRAGMENT!): "Talk to me." He glanced down at the comparatively tiny woman standing next to him. She was leaning forward against the safety wall to get a better view of the city, her toned and athletic figure backlit and obvious in her dark red bodysuit. He knew she was trying to pose and distract him, a gesture he found touching considering how normally reserved and shy she tended to be. "Talk to me, don't shut me out." She turned and peered up at him. "Please."
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: 'Shipper Ficlets!), by Scissors MacGillicutty (COMPLETE!): "I came to get her because we were going to have a late supper at Lauriel de la Ribas' new restaurant. I went into the gallery and just found her on the floor...it looked like she was having a seizure. I thought she fell off the ladder and I called 911 right away."