Thursday, April 4, 2013

"Now, watch out for the girl with the red face who's forgotten how to walk. Oh, never mind. That's you."

Happy Walk Around Things Day! Daria will have a hard time on this one without her contacts, but Jane will be there to help. Just be careful not to run into Upchuck--he might enjoy it.

Fanfic Update!
  • 22nd Century Cynic: Tutor Hell (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Walter Kovacs (COMPLETE!): "Tutoring in the summer helped pay for some relatively minor expenses, which helped since even after the last 2 years, Lawndale's teachers didn't earn all that much. Besides, this summer was particularly quiet since The DeMartino's children were either at camp, interning at Helen's law firm or in the case of their Son, working at Pizza King. thought Tony"

  • Arrival (IC: Daria With the Yeagers), by JPAGC (COMPLETE!): "The young woman and young man entered the building with the slow steps of two people taking a first look of an unknown place. Their unfamiliarity of the place was obvious to any passer-by as they surveyed the elevated ceiling of the hall, taking only a small interest on the passers-by. 'Well, we're here,' said the young woman. She looked at her companion. 'Wolfie, please stop staring. People are going to notice if your mouth catches flies.'"

  • August 27, One Year Later (IC: Daria With the Yeagers), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Ethan Yeager flopped down into the bean bag chair next to Daria and glanced at the TV and groaned at the sight of a news story playing."

  • Behind the Counter, by NightGoblyn (parts 1 and 2): "'Jane, can you, um,' Daria mumbled, her voice barely audible over the radio. 'Can you loan me some money?' 'No.'" (Part 2)

  • The Cat's Meow! (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'Daria,' Jane asked, 'why are you grinning?' 'I never thought the answer to that question would be this,' she replied, 'but I just talked to Upchuck.'"

  • Daria and Stacy (IC: Stacy Morgendorffer), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'My God,' Cindy breathed as she took in the sights, 'This place reeks of paranoia, smarm, liars, and greed.' 'Are you describing this here UFO convention or Mos Eisley?' Stacy asked her friend as they made up the tail end of the group of five at the 5th Annual Lawndale UFO Convention."

  • Darius Taylor, by Shiva (part 5): "As the freshly done up girls shanghaied him out of the house, barely just toweled off from swimming with a now passed out Brian, Darius offered a single, weak protest. 'Can't this wait until we go to Paris?'"

  • DW: The Many Doctors, by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 14): "After another five minutes, she heard a sound. She turned and saw the Doctor walking down the stairs. 'Hello, Doctor,' she said. The Doctor turned to her. 'How did you enter my TARDIS?' he asked in a dark tone."

  • The End of an Era, by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'Huh,' Daria said, almost sounding defeated. 'Huh?' Jane asked. Daria never sounded defeated, or, well, like anything. 'Outpost Mr. T is closing,' Daria explained."

  • The Fall, by Ranger Thorne (parts 1 and 2): "Darth Wroth rose from where she had knelt on the sidewalk. For a moment, her cybernetic eye malfunctioned, then settled down and began to function normally. She held up her left hand and flexed it to make certain it was working properly, then turned to take in her surroundings. 'This is not Corulag,' she muttered." (Part 2)

  • Girlz In Da Hood (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "As thousands of Purifiers from the Order of Infinity, and thousands of high-school students and other Lawndale residents watched, the young woman who looked like she was made of pure electricity strutted across the stage set up in the middle of the LHS football field."

  • The Great Genderswap of Lawndale!, by Shiva (part 6): "'Darius, would you mind switching it over to ESPN?' 'Why?' Darius replied with confusion. 'Because I got drafted on the basketball team and I've got to try and learn about it and junk.' Quinn informed him with a very unmanly huff."

  • Helen and the Ape (Iron Chef: Helen and the Ape), by SinisterExaggerator (part 2): "And a full house she had; the Morgendorffers all reclined in their respective niches. Daria was busy actively doing nothing in her bedroom/crypt, Quinn was probably prancing around to teeny-bopper music somewhere that hopefully wasn't rush-hour traffic, and Jake was...good God, he was cooking."

  • Irony Maiden 02, by BF110C4 (part 1): "Soon enough they reached Stark Industries private airport much to the disappointment of the U.S. Air Force lieutenant Stacy Rowe. 'I could let you fly the plane if you stop that ridiculous pouting.'"

  • Losers No More, by Shiva (part 14): "After a minute of small talk David asked if he had talked to Daria lately and Graham sighed, 'Yeah man, just now but she's gone into a shell.' 'Did you say anything dumb?' David asked without thinking and instantly regretted it. Graham winced, 'No, and that's what has me worried.'"

  • LSD, by PrecambrianStudios (part 3): "Helen waved her hand irritably. 'Yes, yes, he got the girls dropped off and he's heading off to work, tell him-' 'Mrs. Morgendorffer, he said something about the school for the Deaf burning down.' 'WHAT?!'"

  • Mackbeth, by SinisterExaggerator (parts 1 - 3): "[As a storm brews in the distance, three WITCHES enter. They look suspiciously like MS. BARCH, MRS. BENNETT, and MS. MORRIS.]" (Part 2) (Part 3)

  • Mack the Esteemer, by Shiva (part 19): "Then just as he was about to ask if she wanted something to drink, Daria suddenly said, 'You know... I think Mister Bond has given me an idea.' She then leaned over the armrest for her book bag and yanked out a notebook and began to scribble down something very quickly."

  • Mommy's Little Whore (Vignettes: Hell-bent Helen), by Bliss Ticks (part 1): "Daria knew all about her mother; the withdrawal, the preference for prison-like surroundings, the mood swings and inability to cope with people, all products of being raised by a sociopath."

  • Night Witches, by Panzerfaust150 (parts 1 - 3): "It had been a long strange trip for them both to the Air Force, someplace that if you had asked either of them, they both would have shrugged and simply said, 'shit happens'. For Daria, it had all begun one fall day of her senior year of high school in 1977...." (Part 2) (Part 3) (PPMB part 1) (PPMB part 2) (PPMB part 3)

  • Only O'Neill, by PrecambrianStudios (COMPLETE!): "Quinn knocked on her sister's bedroom door. 'Daria, are you in there?' 'No, I'm taking it easy in Tahiti for a few days.' Moron."

  • Slan-Dur, by malakite (part 1): "And so on in this fashion, with ButtHead filling in details as Beavis processed, and raised pertinent questions,most of which ButtHead had anticipated and worked out the answers to. Really, though, to anyone listening, it would seem like the two boys had some variety of aphasia or glossalia,and were perhaps having a competition to see who could out babble whom."

  • Straight from the Hip (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "Why is Jane so intent on meeting me here? Daria asked herself. She exited the taxicab and looked at the sign. Williamsburg, Brooklyn."

  • Tiffany as a Brain (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Shiva (part 1): "Tiffany Blum-Deckler enjoyed the gentle breeze of the morning as she sat on a bench in front of Lawndale High, reading her new book of the month, Trainspotting. She was finding the challenge of understanding the Scots-English invigorating; it was making up for a lack of company at the moment."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "The spectral image that advanced upon Daria, Jane, Jodie and Stacy - all dressed in grey overalls and wearing strange backpacks, cords from each backpack leading into the strange, wand-like devices each girl held like a rifle."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'I can't believe that Principal Li is making us do... this.'" (Continued by Roentgen)

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "The four members of the Fashion Club gathered together. 'Grab your stick!' Sandi shouted."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Since the economic downturn things had gotten pretty hairy for Our Heroine, Daria Morgendorffer."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by SinisterExaggerator (COMPLETE!): "'Fcqzpr gfmqbzfn azyyrkrfq?' Agkzg dgza gd Xgfr occwra hl, lhttora."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes No Daria Fanfic Should Ever Have: Sick, Sad Edition), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "The past should stay in the past. That's what being friends with Daria taught me."

  • Unnamed story (Scenes that should be: Polite Requests), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'She was my best friend in the whole world.'"

  • Victor Morgendorffer, by Shiva (part 8): "'Congratulations on breaking Mr. Edwards.' the voice said in a flat dull tone that very much reminded Victor of his sister Daria. Victor stopped in his tracks and the figure emerged into his line of sight, he wore baggy khakis, a red shirt, aviator glasses, and had dark eyes and curly dark brown hair."

  • When the Cat's Away, by SinisterExaggerator (part 2): "'Is Jane here?' He stroked at the stubble on his chin and thought for a moment. 'When I fell asleep, she was going out to her car.' Both of them instinctively turned their heads towards the driveway. 'It's not there. She must be with y--oh.'"

  • Yunny: DA SEECWEL, by Brain Camper (part 1): "sho daria wnet and het jank un hed u beech i will keel u"

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