A Topsy-Turvy Cigarette Break

Happy World No Tobacco Day! I suppose you can celebrate by not smoking or, if you already don't smoke, then perhaps you can observe the holiday by taking up smoking and then quitting. DeMartino apparently has elected to ignore the holiday completely.

Fandom News!

• neonhomer is going back to school.


• Why do we love? thatLONERchick wants to know your thoughts.


• Charles RB asks, do women lack confidence for the top jobs?


• Check out the ultimate voice actor team-up...or is it? Share your opinion!


• Fanfiction.net is causing more headaches for writers. Share your story or commiserate with others.


• Five new Iron Chefs have been posted in Creative Writing: Reven384's Helen: Housewife, Ms. Kinnikufan's Brittany Morgendoffer and Daria and/or Quinn are from donor eggs, Walter Kovacs's Quinn looks like rita, and Roentgen's Black Daria.

Up, Up, and Away!

It's been awhile since we did one of these!

As always, post your captions in the comments!

Have Fun...but Don't Forget!

Today is Memorial Day in the U.S., the day when many people get the day off school or work and spend time with friends and family at cookouts, on the beach, or in other fun ways to pass the time. However, Memorial Day is a holiday intended to be a day of remembrance of those who have fallen in combat.

The personification of Memorial Day also appeared in a brief cameo in "Depth Takes a Holiday," as a girl with a surfboard begging St. Patrick's Day to call off Lincoln.

Several fanfic authors have written stories to commemorate the day:

• For the Day by RLobinske


• Memorial Day by Angelihel


• The One Day We Forget by Brother Grimace

Fanfic Update!

• Abattoir Blues (1): The Hitman and Her, by LongSnakeMoan (part 4): "I try to imagine him as my age, in a uniform, in a war. I can't do it, he looks like he was born about twenty five and has just aged from that. I can't imagine me in a war, especially one like Vietnam. I can imagine him as a young man though, looking tough in a 70s suit. I bet he was a good lay. I bet he still is. I did not just think that. 'What does it feel like to kill someone?'"


• Agendas, by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "I explained to her that Civic Reflection would give her a lot of opportunity to make choices in our computer modeled environment and have those choices reflected in consequences she could observe. 'So,' she said, 'I'm offered the chance to make a difference in a pretend democracy instead of a real one. I withdraw my objection. This class is perfect for a high school.'"


• All That Remains Is Cold, by Shiva (part 3): "It was a three story turn of the century Victorian house, with a well-manicured and maintained lawn and wrought iron fence and gate. 'Are you guys rich?' Luhrman asked, his curiosity finally getting the better of him. Ester turned her head towards him as the Mercedes rolled through the opening gate and said, 'Pretty much.'"



• Amelia's Spawn! (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'It's a boy.' The doctor said as he held up the blood soaked baby so that it's proud parents could see it."


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 5, by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "While Quinn and Tiffany had gone their own separate ways, Stacy, along with her older sister Susie, had begun their walk towards their house in an awkward, somewhat brutal silence. Susie wasn't sure what had happened back there or how it was even possible, a werewolf turning during the day, five... no SIX days after the full moon was completely impossible, let alone unbelievable..." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Clique Swap, by psychotol (parts 37 and 38): "Scene: Lawndale Airport, an imperial shuttle is landing, Hillary Clinton and the people that were with her in that situation room are stood outside along with some police and armed forces officers. Voiceover: 'On earth, the imperial knights have arrived.'" (Part 38)


• Crossing the Shelter (Hell is Crossed People), by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "The mouse sniffed at Scarlett's face and her chin quivered. Thinking about Roger took her mind off of what happened to her parents, but at the same time, she couldn't stop thinking of them. Something hit the shelter door and Scarlett jumped; a cry of fright escaped her lips and she instantly started shaking."


• Daria - Double Down, by neonhomer (parts 40 and 41): "'You can thank me later.' Said Quinn, who was now standing in the doorway. Daria was surprised by Quinn’s presence. 'For what?' 'Mom and dad. I had a talk with them about a half hour ago. Told them to not bug you with questions.'" (Part 41)



• Esteemsters...of the FUTURE!! (Iron Chef: Daria, as if produced in a Retro-Future world), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "A small hovercar floated down from the stratosphere into the Lawndale sector. In the Utopian Turtletop, Jake Morg-N-DRFR drove his two genetic children, Daria and Quinn to school. 'Girls, I just want you to know your mother and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new planet - especially for you Daria, right?'"


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 6 Loud Desperation, by Shiva (parts 4 and 5): "'Ok, so now that we can’t get byes for our players in, well, any of the teams because Li wants to become a stuck up politico, they’re going to be forced to do the finals on their own.' Morris said, more to herself than the other room’s main occupant. 'Yes,' Gibson replied curtly, 'However you and I both know that most of them, well, they’re not that smart. It’s why they get byes in the first place.'" (Part 5)


• The Exhibition of Valtalea (Interstellar Portals - A worldbuilding scenario), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "Isabella Lambelini, a Postgraduate student on work experience at the Museum, walked towards the lobby where the school group was waiting. 'Welcome to the National Museum. Please follow me to the Exhibition Wing where the Exhibition of Valtalea is on display'"


• First Day of Summer (Quinn's Day), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "'But you need money for shopping. You should not have quit that job at Governor’s Park,' her Mom said. 'But I did pay back the credit card bill for those shoes,' Quinn thought. She was sure that her Mom was going to ask her to find another job to pay for her summer shopping. 'You need to get another job. I’m giving you today to find something that you like, or I’ll find something for you,' Helen said."


• The Joys of Being Skip Stevens, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Skip heard the sounds of fighting downstairs and felt the same old exhaustion once more and did his familiar count, 'One, two, three...'"



• Lawndale and Sandi Griffin’s Genie (Chapter 7), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 3): "“How did the emerald get there?' 'I’ll just ask her.' 'Ok,' Elias waited a bit. 'She saw a squirrel teleport into a tree, apparently.' 'As good an explanation as any, I guess,' Elias responded."


• Lawndale School of Magic Part 4: Andrea, by Reven384 (parts 1 and 2): "'Come on class let’s make Daria’s dream a reality,' Mr. O’Neil said. 'You mean the one where the people on the street burst into flames, because I’ve been working on a rune that does just that,' Daria deadpanned." (Part 2)


• Lost and Found, by Reven384 (parts 1 and 2): "Despair filled her as the horrible truth of her situation hit home. She was on an island in the sea alone with no way to feed herself, no shelter, and she knew she was going to die." (Part 2)


• A Resentful Cynic Ch. 3 The curse of Middleton, by ST91 (part 6): "'Your Mother and I thought it would be wonderful if you kids followed our footsteps.' And become a lax and unjust parent? Thanks Jake, but I refuse the offer. If one day I’ll have children I want them to love me. Daria thought before saying, 'That's nice Mom, have a good time and bring me a souvenir. A shirt would be fine.'"


• Rude Awakening Ep.10: Sandi vs The EPT, by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "SANDI: What are you gitty about? UPCHUCK: He did Brittany. SANDI: So did most of Lawndale County's High School football teams, The Great Prairie State's Varsity and practice Football team and most of the players in the NFL..... Oh and the MLS.... It's considered Football everywhere else."


• Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "'O.K.,Jane, O.W.'s gone to face some sort of judgment, we're on the other side of the arch, watching storm clouds arrive. Suddenly, I'm damned cold and the wind has to be blowing sixty miles per hour. Couldn't the Tikis have dropped us off closer to home?'"



• Sexy Daria: Sexesteemsters, by Shiva (parts 1 - 4): "They pulled up in front of the new school where Daria and Quinn would be attending as a Sophomore and Freshman respectively. Quinn stepped out first and within five seconds had already attracted a crowd, but Daria just smirked and said, 'Wait until they get a load of me.'" (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)


• To Annoy a Mockingbird. Chapter 05, by BF110C4 (COMPLETE!): "It took a while before Jane could gather enough courage to address the elephant on the room, 'Do you want to talk about yesterday?' 'No, not really, but it would be better than to let this stew. So what do you want to know?' Jane didn’t hesitated, 'Are you alright?'"


• Undying Love, by BrownEyedBagel (part 5): "He recalled how much it hurt when it started; the unbearable migraine that ravaged his brain, then the bittersweet relief of when it was over. He lived to see another day, just to realize that he was a walking corpse. The death that followed was not a pleasant way to go."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Invention of Lying), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "'Hi; I’m Brad and this is Brett of Cumberland High. Judging by what Jane said to us and your general demeanor we’d get along. However we’re also related to the infamous Upchuck.' 'I can ever do his "rrrRRR" which I do as a joke when people find out.' Brett added in."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Invention of Lying), by Smijey: "'Girl?' Butt-Head's face screwed up in concentration. 'Oh yeah, there was no girl, huh-huh.' 'What?' Beavis' jaw hung open in disbelief. 'Yeah, I just told you that so I could lay down.' Beavis gritted his teeth together in a grimace of anger. 'You fart-knocker! You told me a chick with big thingies wanted to do it with me, all so you could lie on the couch! You...you...liar!'"

"Unless you WANT us to get wrinkles."

Today is Sunscreen Protection Day, and as Brittany reminds us in "The Old and the Beautiful," "Always wear your sunscreen." Good advice, Brittany. Stacy's making an appearance as the Coppertone girl, and Sandi's going to kill her as soon as she hears about this wardrobe malfunction.

Fandom News!

• cfardell_Brenorenz29 has updated his Fan Site. Check out what's new!


• Feeling under the weather? Share your woes in the PPMB DL and Sickbay thread.


• Erin M. shares his Worldburner Editor's Notes.


• Discuss or post your own stories with Helen taking what she deserves


• BF110C4 posted an Iron Chef in Creative Writign: The Invention of Lying.

Party On, Hoopy Froods!

It's Geek Pride Day! Celebrate by geeking out like Jesse, although don't let the Fashion Club catch you. Geeks everywhere get a double holiday, in fact, because today is also Towel Day, created in honor of the late science-fiction/humor writer Douglas Adams. All I can say is, forty-two!

Fanfic Update!

• Apathymorphs: The Invasion, by JoeMerl (part 4): "Suddenly I heard a tapping sound. It took us all a moment to locate its source—a large, white-and-gray bird was hovering outside my kitchen window, flapping its wings to stay aloft as it tapped on the glass with its beak. We all glanced at each other before I approached. [Good, they see me! Now...how do I make them figure out who I am?] 'Upchuck?' Jodie’s jaw nearly fell to the floor. [...Oh. That was easier than I thought.]"


• Beyond the Verdean Portal (Interstellar Portals - A worldbuilding scenario), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 1): "They were now at a gateway, wondering what was inside. 'Should we go in captain?' one of the officer's asked. 'Absolutely! We have come this far. We cannot turn back now!'"


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 4, by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "Stacy immediately perked up, recognizing the guy who bumped into Sandi as her new, Jewish friend Tom and her sister Susie, 'Oh, guys!!' She was glad someone she could trust was here, 'This is my sister Susie, remember?' Pointing to her she then pointed to Tom, 'This is Tom! He's Jewish!'" (Part 3) (Part 4)


• Bros (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Brian Taylor's grin flashed red stains upon his bright white teeth, laying before him on the bed was a ruined husk that had once been his sister, they had had a lot of fun in the last hours of her life."


• Clique Swap, by psychotol (part 36): "Syn: 'yeah. ... Cade, Deliah and me used to work for Rav, a Feeorin pirate. I grew up with me dad on Rav’s ship, going around looting worlds. That was just normal to me. Cade, we picked him up on our way to Ossus, a world that had a Jedi temple on it. Imps had just killed the Jedi there, we had no idea Cade was a Jedi or at that point I’d have killed him.'"


• A Deadly Reunion (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by RX-87 (COMPLETE!): "As America continues to mourn the loss of its first female president, shocking revelations have come to light that the late President Daria Morgendorffer-Sloane and her killer were not only residents of the same Baltimore suburb during their youth, they were in fact high school classmates."



• Death of Memes (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "'I will kill myself,' Daria decided, standing on the school roof and overlooking the campus. 'For I am an emo child, depressed that my self-inflicted isolation has led the world to misunderstand me. Also, I will disregard my intolerance for pain and thus slit my wrists, like so.'"


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 6 Loud Desperation, by Shiva (parts 1 - 3): "Ethan went back over to the couch and sat down, Josh glanced at him and noticed that his boyfriend seemed worried. 'What’s up man?' Josh asked, concerned by the sudden change in demeanor. 'Mack’s coming over to talk.' Ethan said in a monotone that he rarely used anymore, 'Something’s happened and it doesn’t sound good.'" (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Family New, by RLobinske (part 3): "Rita motioned for the stair step next to here. 'Have seat. Tell me a little about Daria.' Jane sat but said, 'You're her aunt.' Rita sighed. 'Daria's mother and I never got along very well and therefore, so we didn't see each other very often. Now...it's too late.'"


• Judith Cosplay (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Daria Morgendorffer glared at the basket that was filled with her clothes, or rather what had been her clothes. What remained was in ruins since someone (cough-QUINN-cough) had thrown in a dye packet and now everything was tye-dyed."


• Lawndale School of Magic Part Three: Modeling, by Reven384 (COMPLETE!): "Ms. Li smiled as she approached the two members of the modeling agency. They looked at her and shook their heads at her lack of fashion. Ms. Li looked at them like a lioness ready to strike. She waved her hands and the two couldn’t move. 'You will leave my school,' she said."


• Lost and Found, by Reven384 (prologue): "Stacy eeped as the plane shook violently. Quinn’s head darted around nervously as well. She was sure it was nothing but the plan shaking violently made her nervous when she was high in the air. The plane shook again. 'All passengers are to return to their seats at once,' said a shaky voice over the intercom, 'We are going down.'"


• Only the Truth (Iron Chef: The Invention of Lying), by ST91 (parts 1 and 2): "'Hi. I'm Daria Morgendorffer. I'm a 16-years-old cynical, sarcastic teenager. In truth, my way of doing is just a deception. I'm too smart and sensitive to live happily in this world , so I use my way of being like an armor to keep everyone away and avoid being hurt. I believe that the cause of this attitude can be attributed to my family....'" (Part 2)


• A Resentful Cynic Ch. 3 The curse of Middleton, by ST91 (part 5): "She walked faster and faster as to beat the tears that were about to get off her face. Don't cry. Don't cry. You swore that you wouldn't have allowed them to reduce you in this state anymore. Unfortunately Daria failed and began to cry."



• TDJS CH. 2 Interlude, by ST91 (COMPLETE!): "Alright Jake, you have to behave like a good father and chat with your son. The argument doesn’t matter now, it’s important to form a real bond with your kid. You don’t have to be like that cold-hearted rat bastard. The thoughts of his father ran wild. You won’t be a nightmare for him! You won’t undermine his self-esteem by sending him to a lousy military school because he’s not man enough for you! You don’t have too..."


• To Annoy a Mockingbird. Chapter 05, by BF110C4 (part 6.3): "Biting her tongue, Daria stopped the sarcastic remark that threatened to leave her lips and instead introduced properly. 'Hi, I’m Daria, and this is my partner in crime Jane, I believe that we were invited by Heather.' Upon realizing recognizing the names her whole demeanor changed, the scowl faded and was replaced with something that could pass for a warm smile... for a jackal."


• Undying Love, by BrownEyedBagel (part 4): "Jane lost herself in her thoughts. It wasn’t like it was the first time she had torn a live person apart with her hands. It wasn’t the first time she had devoured a human being. Hell, it wasn’t even the first time she had entered a carnal rage right in front of Daria; most of her meals came from her anyway. What bothered her was that this was the first time that she had lost control in her studio."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Invention of Lying), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "Mack took a drink of his soda, and looked right into Jodie's eyes. 'I'll tell you this - the first time I see Daria after I graduate, if she says anything that even remotely comes across as 'yes', I'm taking her off somewhere, and working that like it's my summer job to pay for my books and rent come college in the fall.' 'I can see that,' Jodie agreed. 'I'm going to make a point of running into her either next summer, or during the Christmas break of my Sophomore year. I bet she's like a honey badger in bed.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: The Invention of Lying), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "'So Quinn, will you go on a date with us?' the Three Js asked. 'What? Are you crazy?' Quinn asked."


• Unamed story (Stories with Helen taking what she deserves), by 11tee (COMPLETE!): "Helen mounted the stairs gingerly, trying not to see what lay before her. That's when she saw the note."


• Unnamed story (This can't be the start of a round robin... IS IT?!), by Fhujeth_x (part 1): "Tiffany headed towards the breakfast table. Her mind was set on attending school, but first she had to make sure she was well fed for the day. After all, her mother always said; 'Girl, you better eat yo' food or I'm gonna slap you 'cross the face, ya hear?'"


• Vive Le Boom (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "Daria heard her cellphone ringing. Without her glasses, she felt blindly for it until she found it on the bedstand. She mumbled, 'Hello?' 'Daria?' It was Quinn. 'Where the hell are you?'"


• Vivian, by ST91 (part 3): "She's back, she's back. I'm not dreaming. She's back after all this years ... after she .... she... thought Brittany while tears ran down her cheeks. After she has left you... said another voice in his head. Immediately the whirlwind of emotions that had overwhelmed Brittany disappeared and left space for another emotion: anger."


• Welcome to the Green Room, by TheExcellentS (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane clinked their soda cups. To the rest of their lives. Then... there was light. Before either Daria or Jane could comprehend what was happening, the light consumed them and all around them. Until there was nothing."


• What Did You Do During The War, Daria?, by echopapa (part 4): "Heading for the danger zone, Daria thought quickly. She knew that there was no way she was going to dump Jane in the middle of a firefight, but she also knew that Jane was stubborn and would indeed follow her unless..."

Her Ex-Husband Left Her...Very, Very Slowly

Happy World Turtle Day! This is a holiday intended to increase awareness about helping turtles and tortoises survive. As a science teacher, Ms. Barch is probably in favor of this. As a horribly bitter jilted woman, she's probably only in favor of saving the female ones. Which...doesn't make much sense, scientifically speaking. Oh, well. Carry on, turtle fans!

Fandom News!

• A teen girl in Egypt invented a quantum interstellar drive. What does it mean for the planet? Discuss!


• DC comics fans can talk about the soon-to-be-revealed new gay/lesbian superhero as well as the Superman/Batman/Wonder Woman love triangle.


• rainbows0316 is looking for Daria/Jane fics.


• Fhujeth_x started a new Round Robin about Tiffany and her parents.


• Two new Iron Chefs have been posted in the Creative Writing forum: Shiva's Ms. Barch Becomes a Better Person and Reven384's Janet Barch Morgendorffer.

It's, Like, Elemental, My Dear Mack Daddy!

Happy birthday to the late Arthur Conan Doyle, born on this day in 1859! Doyle is best known for creating the character Sherlock Holmes, a brilliant detective who shares nothing in common with Kevin as far as I can tell. I guess both are adept at converting oxygen to carbon dioxide?

At least two Daria fanfics have paid homage to Sherlock Holmes: Ranger Thorne's A Study in Emerald and M Man's The Adventure of the Chinese Restaurant. If there are more that I'm missing, please do share them in the comments!

Fanfic Update!

• All That Remains Is Cold, by Shiva (part 2): "Garrett and Ester gave each other polite hellos but after that Garrett excused himself but managed to catch Luhrman’s attention with a raised eyebrow and a wink before departing. 'Let me guess, one of the guys on the football team, right?' 'Yup, and several other sports,' Luhrman replied, 'But I don’t feel like listing them.' 'Or thinking about them at all.' Ester replied in turn, and earning a small smile from Luhrman."


• At the Crossroads...(Chapter 10), by oni (part 1): "Slanting her eyebrows, Sandi looked at Quinn questionably. 'Gee, I don’t know Quinn,' Sandi started, trying to be nice about it. 'Are you sure that there isn’t anything else on?' Quinn let out a sigh before saying, 'Sandi, if this is your way of getting me to put Sick Sad World on, then think again.'"


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 3, by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "Stacy shot out of bed, nervously running towards the downstairs. A dream? It was a dream. It felt so real. Was it real? Every ounce of her body was shaking cold as she nearly fell down the stairs in panic, winding up in her kitchen. 'Mom?!' She shouted, staring at her mother who was sitting so quietly at the table, staring out the window towards the back yard, 'Oh, I am so glad you're okay, I had a horrible dream!!'"


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 4, by Fhujeth_x (part 1): "Nervously, Stacy looked at Sandi, then at Quinn and Tiffany, then back at Sandi, hoping the other two girls might support the 'Omega' of the group, 'But Sandi, it's really important...' She held up her hands, 'Look...'"


• The Cynic Perspective (IC: The DeMartino's), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "Kevin sat alone in his room trying to write something. At least that’s how I think it happened. I would find him dead; he had hung himself. It was less than pleasant, but people need to know this."



• Daria: This Time with Attitude, by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "Jake - Girls, I just want you to know your mother and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new town -- especially for you, Daria, right? Daria - Did we move? (opens one eye and looks around) Well, I’ll be damned. We moved."


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 5 Alien Laser Dance Party!, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'There was a lot of weirdness today,' Josh said to Ethan as they reached the front door of the Yeager residence, 'But I hope that the worst is over now.' 'I wouldn’t count on it.' Ethan replied as he found the right key on his chain and unlocked the door and they entered and quickly ran into two people that they never thought to see at Ethan Yeager’s home. Tom and Elsie Sloane, both with small suitcases and sleeping bags." (Part 5) (Part 6)


• How do you Judge a Problem like Amelia?, by Charles RB (part 4): "'You have to stop them faster than this or they’ll be able to regroup and scorch your world!' screamed Amelia, firing headshots at every foe she saw. 'And if they see me – if Judith hears I’m-' 'We’re doing as fast as we can with the army we –' Amy This stopped. 'Idea. Control, this’ This, I have urgent intel and a strategic suggestion!'"


• In a Blink of an Eye, by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "Why did she agree to this? Lunch with her ex! Timothy thinks it’s to face inner demons, but no: she wanted to see the worm crawling. She needed to validate her much better off she was without a man. That Timothy was a women at heart."


• Lawndale School of Magic Part Three: Modeling, by Reven384 (parts 1 and 2): "She fingered the compact in her pocket. It provided the perfect cover. After all no one would believe she had any desire to get on a cruise boat otherwise. She smiled as Brittany and Kevin followed her. They wouldn't mind missing a day of school." (Part 2)


• Obey Ms. Li! (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Angela Li glared down at the pathetic figure groveling before her, she had forced her to wear a dog collar, a leash (which she was holding), skimpy pink speedos, and had just forced her to lick dog crap off of her shoes."


• Playing Both Sides (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by Walter Kovacs (COMPLETE!): "Kevin - (sings) Seventy eight bottles of beer on the wall, seventy eight bottles of beer! If one of those bottles should happen to fall, seventy-seven bottles of..."


• A Resentful Cynic Ch. 3 The curse of Middleton, by ST91 (part 4): "'Well I could go with Jane and Andrea to visit the Lawndale State...' 'Uh-huh.' Helen said, distracted by her work. '...Or we could all go together in Boston.' She said, feigning innocence to perfection. 'WHAT?' Shouted Helen suddenly very focused on the discussion. Boston for her meant only one thing. Amy."


• The Secret Life of Penny Lane: The New Partner, by 11tee (part 2): "Jodie chuckled as she stated, 'I lived in Louisiana for a couple years pursuing my Masters. I actually LIKE hot and sticky. I don't mind sweating.' 'Good. Where we're going in twenty hours is like that: hot and sticky.' 'Twenty hours? What?' Jodie exclaimed. 'Twenty hours. I hope you pack fast. Besides, where we're going, you could always go primitive. The natives do.' The look on Penny's face indicated she was not stranger to living 'primitive'."


• The Secret to Happiness (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Wakey, wakey, eggs and bacey...' Two twin eerily happy voices sang as Daria Morgendorffer slowly came back to concusses. Her blurry eyes were unable to focus on the two figures that were standing above her, until one of them was kind enough to place her glasses on her face, bringing back focus."



• Snap Decision (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by NapalmKracken (COMPLETE!): "'He doesn't know what it means. He's got the whole course memorized.' Daria turned slightly and looked at the raven haired girl. She was alternative and seemed friendly enough. Great, and now one of them wants to engage me in conversation."


• Unnamed story (Amelia in Lawndale), by ThanatosRW (COMPLETE!): "Stacy was surprised to find someone else already hiding in the bush. At first, she thought it was one of Quinn's many boy toys, but was surprised to find it was a girl. Stacy knew she had seen her somewhere around Lawndale high, but just couldn't remember where."


• Unnamed story (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "'Lane,' Daria read off of the mail box as she walked with Jane up to her new friend's house. 'Wait a second, you wouldn't be related to an Agustus Lane, would you? Lived around eighteen ten to about eighteen sixty five?'"


• Unnamed story (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by Vukodlak (COMPLETE!): "'I kissed your boyfriend I kissed Tom.' Daria smirked maliciously. 'Then we did a whole lot more and have been for a past week.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Angila (Drunk) :'You know what? F*ck Lawndale High....'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by DeacBlue (COMPLETE!): "'Damn!' Daria said as she looked at the large marinara stain, over multiple articles of clothing. 'And that's my last clean set.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Daria Morgendorffer smiled at the sleeping figures on her bedroom floor, the celebration of her graduation had been incredible."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Reven384 (COMPLETE!): "Quinn was wrapped tight in Stacy's embrace. Stacy was stroking her face and Quinn did her best to hide her fear as the TV blared in the background. 'How are you doing honey?' Stacy asked."


• The Wake, by OverlordMikey (part 2): "Daria slept; all the while dreams of Lawndale flowed through her head. She dreamt she was singing with everyone after a hurricane. It was both wonderful and confusing at the same time. She wished she could have stayed, but bitter reality reared it’s ugly head. Her eyes popped open and sitting beside her on a chair was Trent. He was looking somewhat less Trent-like with his lack of chin hair and a mustache, but he was a familiar presence in what was a strange world."

Easy Enough, Right?

Happy Be a Millionaire Day! Of course, we're all going to celebrate by instantly becoming millionaires, right? Or we could all celebrate by having everyone else send me tons of money so that I can be a millionaire! I see no downside to this plan.

Today is also the anniversary of the birth of the late actor Jimmy Stewart, born on this day in 1908. Not only was Stewart a millionaire by the end of his life (maybe it's just a good day to be born?), but he also starred in many classic films. One of these was It's a Wonderful Life, which was referenced at least twice throughout Daria--in "Depth Takes a Holiday" and "Jake of Hearts"--as well as in the Beavis and Butt-head episode "It's a Miserable Life."

Fandom News!

• neonhomer is looking for a real-life version of Daria's glasses.


• What would you consider to be the correct ratio of admins/users on a message board?


• Arena del Sur muses about a situation where the opposites are crossed and asks for thoughts and experiences.


• Who do you think are cat people vs. dog people in Daria?


• Erin M. engages in some cinematic masochism by going to see Battleship.


• Vukodlak posted a new Iron Chef in Creative Writing: The DeMartino's.

For the Men and Women in Uniform

Today is Armed Forces Day in the United States, during which we honor those who serve (or served) in any of the branches of the military. Army, Navy, Marines, Air Force, and Coast Guard, we salute you!

This is also the anniversary of the original airing of "The Story of D" in 2001. Daria gets rejected from Musings Magazine, and doesn't take it very well. But hey, she can always try sending her stuff to Val.

Fanfic Update!

• Anonymouse Ear (Non-Daria), by DeacBlue (COMPLETE!): "Buffy sat down on the grass and pounded it with her fists. Since she was a Slayer, they made quite a dent. 'DamndamndamndamnDAMN!' she growled."


• Another Something..., by oni (COMPLETE!): "'Hey, I know you,' the prison inmate said to the new girl who was going to be her new cellmate. The inmate’s head was shaved and there was a piercing through her right eyebrow. She was looking down from the top bunk in the prison cell and eyed the new one with a certain curiosity."


• Apathymorphs: The Invasion, by JoeMerl (part 3): "There was a pause. 'Jane?' 'Yeah?' 'Please tell me that was all a dream.' To my own surprise, I started laughing. Or at least making a nervous tittering sound that sort of resembled laughter. 'Yeah. Definitely. We’ll both wake up tomorrow and it’ll be like none of this ever happened.'"


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 3, by Fhujeth_x (part 2): "'Mom!' She tripped heading down the stairs, 'Are you home?' She nervously mumbled, 'You forgot to--' 'Come on Stacy.' The figures of her mom, sister, and father stood in church attire, in an almost eerie, somewhat 'children of the corn' way. 'It's time for church'"


• Clique Swap, by psychotol (part 35): "Quinn: 'Well, been an adventure, but to be honest, I’m glad to see the back of it.' Stacy: 'Yeah, it was pretty exciting except for the Sith trying to kill us and that prisoner we had to torture.' Deliah: Offscreen: 'What???'"


• Daria - Double Down, by neonhomer (parts 38 and 39): "Daria was about to say something, when the auditorium lights dimmed down, and the movie started. Daria was taking a handful of popcorn, when she felt Trent place his arm across the back of her seat. “Trent,” she whispered, 'It’s okay. You can put your arm around me.' 'Oh...' he whispered, moving his arm down to lay across Daria’s shoulders." (Part 39)


• A Distant Lawndale (Part Two), by Arena del Sur (COMPLETE!): "'Dad... I... I swore... that I'm not defeated yet. And as soon as you came back... we'll figuring out any solution...' A waxing moon was raising over on the day sky, a little beautiful sparrow flew over the place where I was on my knees and raised their flight. I don't know why, but in that very moment I felt an irresistible desire to sleep."


• DW: The Many Doctors (Non-Daria), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (part 8): "'Good idea, but the TARDIS wouldn’t know where to find its future self!' Felicia said. 'Not necessarily. I once found out that the TARDIS had catalogued console rooms that didn’t exist yet. Perhaps it knows where it is going to be shortly after the incident in which you are transferred here,' the Doctor said. 'That makes no sense, a catalogue of console rooms that didn’t exist yet?' Tamsin asked. 'That was what it said,' the Doctor said."



• Dylan, by J-D (part 4c): "Rod didn’t have anything better to do than turn up for the grand launch of FitzPatrick’s ridiculous baby, Café Lawndale, the new coffeehouse for ‘young adults’. He figured some of the performances would have to be stupid enough to justify the price of admission, so he brought his sketchbook along."


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 5 Alien Laser Dance Party!, by Shiva (parts 2 and 3): "'I was wanting to ask your guy’s advice on something.' 'Shoot.' Josh replied. Mack sighed and continued with, 'Jodie and I... Well we’re on the rocks and I do like her, and maybe once loved her but I don’t think its going to work out, But I don’t know how to break it off.'" (Part 3)


• First Impressions (IC: Daria and Jane:Enemies at first sight), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Jane walked into self esteem class and saw the new girl sitting in the front row. Jane frowned and took a seat behind her. Halfway through O'Neill's opening speech, the girl raised her hand and interrupted. Jane grit her teeth and stood."


• God Save The Esteem ep41: Is It Fun Yet?, by Charles RB (part 11): "For the last few weeks, her thoughts had been bleak and focused on her faults and pointlessness, and when they hadn’t been about that there’d been nothing, her mind a blank void. Nihilism had been a comforting blanket. More and more, she was thinking about other things. She was missing Jane and Tom, really missing them, not just having a pain in her chest but thinking – when she bothered to think – that everyone around her had to go."


• How Do You Judge a Problem Like Amelia?, by Charles RB (parts 1 - 3): "When the stranger blew into town, past the gang tags and the urine marks and the old bullet scars from last year’s block war, she saw another reason why it sucked. A lanky blond reason in urban camouflage that you could see a mile off, waving a sawn-of Colt Piecesmaker repeater with “eet thiz” written on the barrel, yelling 'FREEZE OR DIE MUTIE SCUMBAG!!!'. 'Um.'" (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Mad About The Boy, by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "I became aware, well re-aware, of him when I by chance saw him on stage with his band. I'd stumbled into some dirty place called The Zon one evening searching for a drink after a long, hard day at school."


• Ms. Barch Gets Made Over (Scenes Daria Fanfics should have: Just Desserts), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Good morning Ms. Barch.' a masculine voice said to her while Janet tried to get her bearings, her vision was blurry but slowly focused upon the face in front of her to reveal..."


• The Secret Life of Penny Lane: The New Partner, by 11tee (part 1): "Penny walked up to the haybale and grimaced. Carbon arrows weren't cheap. At least they didn't come out of her pocket, though. She pulled each arrow out and examined the tip and fletching prior to slipping each in her quiver. The three bad arrows accompanied the nine good ones, though she unscrewed the field tips on those so they sat lower in the quiver. She knew her accuracy was amazing, but she never wanted to compete. She was content knowing she was as good an archer as anybody alive, and she hunted the most dangerous game."



• Tales from the Daria Eaterbase (Pie, Pie, My Darling), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Helen was surprised to open the door to see her (elder) daughter, accompanied by a police officer. 'Helen Morgendorffer?' the man asked. At her uneasy nod, the officer continued. 'We got a call frm Playhouse 99 that your daughter was...exposing herself.'"


• Undying Love, by BrownEyedBagel (part 3): "He made his way through the ruins of Lawndale trapped in his thoughts. This wasn’t the first time he had lead someone to their death; but he intended it to be the last."


• An Unexpected Friend; of the Aquatic Variety (Iron chef: The Morgendorffers get a Pet), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "Jane followed Daria into her room. It was exactly as she had described it, with padding on the walls and bars in the windows. 'Wow,' she said. She took it in. A poster of a half-unearthed skeleton, a plain bed, a television on a trolly, models of a heart and a slice of cheese, another televison on a ceiling mount and a bookshelf with a computer set-up. Not to mention a Kafka poster. However, between the computer and the books was a small aquarium."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by 45Ranger (COMPLETE!): "Sonny - Hey, what's up? Talk to me. Daria - I kissed your boyfriend."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "(Start 1950s era wholesome household Leave it to Beaver type music) (Jake has a huge, way too happy smile that would make even Stephen King think twice.) 'Hi there! Welcome to Lawndale! The greatest place in the world to raise a family! I know, because me and the wife and kids just love it here. Come on in, and I’ll introduce you around....'"


• Worldburner Finale: The Heart of the Matter, by Erin M. (COMPLETE!): "But worst of all were the two words burned into Reiko's flesh, standing out in raised pink and black welts on her back: 'WAR'S OVER.' 'What the hell does that mean?' Richard said, looking at Archangel. The Ringbearer huffed through his nostrils. 'Nothing good,' he replied. 'If anything I--'"

One Pizza with Entrails, Coming Up!

Happy birthday to the late Maureen O'Sullivan, who was born on this day in 1911. O'Sullivan was known for playing Jane in six Tarzan movies in the thirties and forties. Jane Lane over there is still deciding if she's the lady or the tiger, though.

Today is also the anniversary of the first Kentucky Derby in 1875. Now, I could have gone with the Jake-and-Helen horse alter ego for today's post, but I decided against it. You're welcome.

Finally, on this day in 1993, the Beavis and Butt-head episode "Scientific Stuff" aired. In it, Daria helps the boys with their science project--or do they help her? It's deep, man.

Fandom News!

• Roentgen discusses the Straight White Male difficulty setting for the real world.


• Did you know there was a Soviet Eurovision? Find out more in the thread!


• Have you been playing Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode II? Discuss it in the thread!


• ThanatosRW wonders what would happen if Amelia lived in Lawndale?


• JPAGC posted two new Iron Chefs: The Morgendorffers get a Pet and No Kiss.


• Ranger Thorne is looking for advice on an artwork in progress.

Think He'll Play "Girls Just Want to Have Fun"?

Happy birthday to the late Liberace, born on this day in 1919. I still can't get over DeMartino's alter ego of the entertainer, partly because of the difference between the personalities and partly because of how maniacally happy the man looks.

Also, on this day in 1999, The New York Times published an article about Daria. It starts out talking about Dawson's Creek, but keep reading. It's about Daria, I promise.

Fanfic Update!

• The Aeronauts – A Steampunk Romance, by peetz5050 (COMPLETE!): "It was no demon that she beheld now though, his dark skin glistening with sweat from his labors and the folds of his limbs creased with dirt. Some called him Mike and some Mack, some Mister Mackenzie and quite a few who had the effrontery to call him 'boy', or worse, to his face but to her he was and always would be Michael, her guardian angel, her defender, her love and soon, she hoped..."


• All Expenses Paid Vacation To..., by Fhujeth_x (part 1): "Aside from Sandi's random outburst, the Fashion Club had been silent for the majority of the trip, 'This boat ride is really...' The boat hit the land with a solid bump, leaving time and room for all the girls to realize that they had indeed arrived, 'Long.' Tiffany finished her sentence and stood up, heading towards the door."


• All That Remains Is Cold, by Shiva (introduction and part 1): "Ester Morgendorffer brushed her auburn locks away from her face, regretting not doing her hair up in a ponytail, the wind had been blowing and she had assumed that it would have ended by now, but it hadn't. But regardless, the young woman did her best to ignore the discomfort and knelt down to place the twin bouquets of roses upon the small graves." (Part 1)



• At the Crossroads...(Chapter 9), by oni (COMPLETE!): "Just as she was getting off the phone, Helen, along with Sandi, heard a slow series of knocks from the front door. As Helen moved her way through the living room to the front door, Sandi gave the mother a nervous glance. Deciding to look through the peephole instead of simply asking who it was; Helen saw Tiffany on the other side of the door."


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 2, by Fhujeth_x (COMPLETE!): "'This antisantaclausism has to stop!' She glanced at her family, 'Just because Tom is Jewish...' 'Jewish?' Someone mumbled in the background and looked over at Tom, then back at Stacy. Stacy continued, 'Doesn't mean that he should be bullied by you guys. I don't know him very well and stuff, but just because he doesn't believe in Santa Clause and stuff, doesn't mean he should be talked to like he's a monster or a freak!'" (Part 3)


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 3, by Fhujeth_x (part 1): "Turning to her Teddy Bear, Stacy Rowe smiled and gave him a hug, 'I wonder why Mom wont let me go to Bromwell...' Realizing it probably had to do with her grades, she sighed, 'I need to try better this year.' Looking up at her ceiling, she thought about school, then how wretched it would be to hang out with Sandi at Lawndale State."


• A Distant Lawndale (Part Two), by Arena del Sur (part 7): "I ran to the hall. Here, with his back turned on to me, Dad was leaning against the ticket counter. 'Dad.' He turned his head with a look of incredulity. 'Daria! But... what are you doing here?' 'Dad...' I said. 'Where are you going? Back home... everyone's waiting for you.'"


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 4 Power to the Snark, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "In fact the reason she was late had nothing to do with her new glasses, she had picked those up last night, the reason for her delayed arrival was because of couple of tiny cameras she now had upon her person. 'One for my coat buttons, one for Sack’s office if I can manage it.' Daria thought to herself, her stomach fluttering at the thought of what she was trying to pull." (Part 2)


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 5 Alien Laser Dance Party!, by Shiva (part 1): "'What about that dance thing the principal was talking about?' Shaggy suggested. 'What?' Jane replied while Daria asked, 'What principal?' 'You could run the dance committee and decorate the gym with your big art project.' Shaggy offered up while playing with a piece of joint paper (minus the Pot since he didn’t want to lose his stash)."



• Family New, by RLobinske (part 2): "'I'll try to take care of things from here. Maybe find something for us to eat.' 'I'm not feeling very hungry.' 'Just in case. I'll be down here if you need me.' 'Okay,' Daria said, heading up the stairs. At the top, she stopped and turned. 'Rita?' 'Yes?' 'Check on me in about an hour?' 'I will.'"


• The Hunter Home from the Hill, by DeacBlue (part 3): "'Daria Morgendorffer,' she said, holding out her hand. Upchuck took it, and bent his lips down to kiss her hand. When his lips touched her skin, everyone was surprised at the speed Daria showed in pulling her hand back, holding a very sharp rock to his neck, baring her teeth, and growling. 'Upchuck, you really might want to back off,' Jane observed, as she sat with her arms crossed."


• Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "Daria and Jane turned their heads very slowly, as if their necks had just undergone a difficult triple cervical fusion operation. A large shadowy figure gathered definition and stepped out of the gritty twilight fog. It was Orson Welles, who then said: 'The time has come to speak of cabbages and Gods.'"


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria on the Oregon Trail), by Vukodlak (part 1): "The year was 1850 and the Morgendorffer Family was heading out west to start a new life. They had signed on to a wagon train in Nauvoo and were headed for the Rogue River Valley."

Searching for Mystical Artifacts...in Between Naps!

Happy birthday to George Lucas, born on this day in 1944. Perhaps best known for creating (and over-editing) the Star Wars franchise, Lucas also created the character Indiana Jones, impersonated on the right by Trent. I'm not sure if Trent has the stamina to pull off some of Indy's big stunts, but I'll bet that whip comes in handy when the rest of The Spiral slacks off during practice.

Fandom News!

• cfardell_Brenorenz29 has created a new fan site, called Lessons of Lawndale. Go check it out and start sending submissions!


• The PPMB is going to raise the linked image resolution limit, so offer your suggestions in the thread.


• dulcinea wonders about the idea of Daria as everybody's confidant


• ST91 has seen his first Beavis and Butt-head episode, and has a question.


• Talk about Nemo Blank's fanfic Too Many Choices in the Golden Oldies forum.

Yo Mama!

Happy Mother's Day! Helen's trying to decide whether or not she can blow off her Mother's Day brunch to get in a few extra hours at the office, but the rest of us can celebrate. Richard Lobinske wrote a Mother's Day-themed fanfic, Shared XX, and there are probably others I'm forgetting. If you know of any, please share them in the comments!

Fanfic Update!

• Abbatoir Blues (1): The Hitman and Her , by LongSnakeMoan (part 3): "Fuck it, it's now or never. Better to be straight with her and let her make her own choice. Gently does it though, I can't risk her taking off. I'm surprised every morning when I wake up and find she's still there. I always half expect to come down one morning and find her gone."


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 2, by Fhujeth_x (parts 1 and 2): "Nervously Stacy started down the stairs, hoping to hang near her sister, meet this 'steady boyfriend', and keep a safe distance from any dangerous sorts of conversations about her personal life and grades, unaware of how strange tonight's dinner really would be." (Part 2)


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 4 Power to the Snark, by Shiva (parts 3 - 5): "'Procrastination is the enemy that will force us to clean up roadkill.' Ethan said in a monotone sing-song voice, reminding his boyfriend and his two girls that were his friends, but not girlfriends, as they approached the wall that was covered in sign-up sheets." (Part 4) (Part 5)


• Family Reunion, by januense (part 4): "Daria was about to have her first encounter with Addam's cuisine and Jane, wanting to preserve her best friend from strange and potentially harmful surprises, tried to advise her. 'Ok, Morgendorffer. First rule: don't touch Grandmama's biscuits if you value your life. Second rule: if you notice some movement in your dish, FIRST stab it and only investigate AFTER ...'"


• Found, by DIsaac (part 2): "I knew this day would come... Just not this soon. I know what he is about to ask. I still remember it and the deal that was made. What do I say? What do I say? Maria, say something dammit! For the love of god.... Say something!"



• The Hunter Home from the Hill, by DeacBlue (parts 1 and 2): "They were rocking in a hug for what seemed like days, but could only have been minutes, when Jake relaxed his grip a bit. 'Kiddo, we're so glad to have you back, but where were you? How did you get here? Heck, how did you find us?' Daria hung her head again. 'It's...a long story, Daddy. How I got here? I made some friends.' She motioned to the minivan, and made a 'come-here' gesture. The doors opened up, and all six girls got out." (Part 2)


• Invitations (Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'Daria-!' 'Yes, Quinn – I got one, too. Well, several announcements, and an invitation.' 'Oh, Well, okay, then.' Quinn was visibly deflated as she stood in the commons area of the twenty-first floor of Legion Tower, looking over her fellow Legionnaires – and noticing that each had a small pile of graduation announcements in their general vicinity. "


• Kevin and the 'Baby' (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'Awww... Did the bae-bay make messes in it's nappie?' Kevin Thompson cooed to the figure in the playpen, his 'little girl' had just started crying, but a quick check of her diaper revealed that it was dry."


• Meanwhile, in the Green Room of Eternity... (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by TheExcellentS (COMPLETE!): "They were well catered for when they weren't out on assignment. The amenities were comparable to most luxury hotels. But the one thing that they all truly wanted... freedom... was something they could never have."


• ST: ANC: A Time of Terror (Non-Daria), by cfardell_Brenorenz29 (COMPLETE!): "'Unknown biosign on the bridge,' the computer said. Natima Dacet did not like the sound of that. She backed against the veiwscreen and looked around the bridge. Nothing, or at least, nothing visible. Then an eerie light began to fill the bridge. She edged along to the nearby turbolift. The light coalesced into something, spectral, for the lack of a better term. It came towards her. 'No! Stay away!'"



• TDJS Ch. 2 Interlude, by ST91 (part 4): "'True, but Dario should not even have been put into that class... like all the kids who were forced to take part.' Helen said the latter with a tone of voice that was as cold and sharp as a blade of ice. That tone of voice, Dario knew, was the manifestation of a vast and terrifying anger. At that moment he almost felt pity for Ms.Li... almost."


• Undying Love, by BrownEyedBagel (parts 1 and 2): "She moved where the man would see her as she usually would to greet an intruder. He did hesitate the way they always did, and asked the same question that the braver ones could force out. 'What...are you?' Daria's answer was always the same. 'Sadly for you, not the last thing you'll ever see.'" (Part 2)


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by LongSnakeMoan (COMPLETE!): "'Helen, I have a confession.' 'What Jakey?'"


• WaM, Ma'ams, Dark Paladin, by DeacBlue (part 7): "While the humans were discussing the various issues, April sat. And sat. And sat some more, until she finally stood up and said, 'I'm going to connect up with Gay Deceiver to discuss how we can upgrade her.' At Zeb's stricken look, she said, 'Don't worry, we're just giving her more room to think and work. Literally a thousand times more, in both directions.'"

Two Years Later, It's Still Awesome!

Happy anniversary, Daria fans! Two years ago today was the official release date for the Daria DVD set, although several lucky fans got theirs a bit earlier than that. It's still an important day for fandom, though, and one that should be celebrated with all enthusiasm!

Also on this day, in 1998, The New York Times published an article about Daria. Check it out for some interesting remarks about the show from the creators and writers.

Fandom News!

• Have cats or like them a lot? Check out Austria's new cat cafe!


• LadieT officially announces a Cheer Lord and Angst Lord wedding, and also asks for advice.


• Can you help explain political parties in the United States?


• Roentgen wonders if fanfic characters can really be "shared."


• TheExcellentS continues to update the 2012 Finished Daria Fanfiction List. Thanks, TES!

This is What Daria Sees Whenever Someone Mentions Extracurricular Activities

It was on this day in 1869 that the Golden Spike was driven at Promontory Summit in Utah. This marked the completion of the First Transcontinental Railroad, which was the first railroad to connect the east and west coasts of the United States. Just a little something for the train fans out there--you know who you are!

Fanfic Update!

• About Us, K&D (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'So... about us...?' Kevin Thompson began asking hesitantly, not sure how else to start the topic. 'I... I don't know.' Daria Morgendorffer said, her face a kaleidoscope of emotions."


• Andrea's Tears, by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "I’ll be honest, what he is wearing... it doesn’t really suit him. His tux matches him as well as the wedding dress goes with me. The only reason were doing this is because my mother has been fantasizing about this day since I was born."


• Apathymorphs: The Invasion, by JoeMerl (part 2): "[They are parasites,] the alien explained. [They—UGH!] Another blast of pain went through us; I saw the alien’s chest rise and fall rapidly, the slits on his face expanding with effort. [They live in the bodies of hosts. In this form they are known as Controllers. They enter the brain and connect to its neurons and synapses, taking over their minds and bodies.] 'Wait—you mean like people?' Jodie said in amazement. 'There are aliens on Earth—living inside people’s brains?'"



• At the Crossroads...(Chapter 9), by oni (part 2): "When Tori finally got up to them to speak, she could only get a couple words out before Stacy grabbed her and pushed her up against the lockers. Everyone else in the hall came to a dead stop and watched the enraged Stacy yell at Tori, excusing her of being behind the attack. Quinn came right in front of her best friend and tried to pull her off of the girl."


• Blessings of the Moon -- Chapter 1, by Fhujeth_x (parts 2 and 3): "Sipping his coffee, Mr. Rowe nodded, 'So... Stacy...' He glanced over at his wife, nervously, 'You weren't out past cur--' Lightly punching her husband in the arm, Mrs. Rowe alerted her husband not to mention anything about curfew, 'Stacy, I was wondering, think you could run down to PayDay this morning, pick up some food for the family dinner we're having tonight?'" (Part 3)


• Crossing The Legion (Hell is Crossed People), by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "'...Here comes the kick - and it's GOOD!' The unholy sound of the puppy, howling in pain as Tom Sloane's kick sent it whirling off the roof of Legion Tower and into the distance, brought a smile to Sandi Griffin's face. 'Well, well, Tommy boy. Looks like we found something that you do well.'"


• Darryl (PLOT BUNNIES: free to good home), by DeacBlue: "'I'll try to help Quinn through this difficult period of adjustment, Dad. See you.' He sighed as he made his way, ignored through the doors of Lawndale High. At least he thought he was ignored. While Quinn was busy chatting with the popular girls, several jock-types looked at the 5'3" boy with long hair and scented fresh meat. 'Hey, look!' the blond one said, 'We've got a geek here that doesn't know if he's a boy or a girl!'"


• A Distant Lawndale (Part Two), by Arena del Sur (part 6): "'Dad...' I said and Dad looked at me. 'Tell me...' 'Yes?' 'I wondered... Are you happy?'"



• Dropping Meteors (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by Walter Kovacs (COMPLETE!): "'...And that was your valedictorian's speech. Now, here's to a fine young woman who started at this institution as a frosh and is now graduating with high honors. I present to you Daria Sloane, who will be recieving this award for academic distinction and valor beyond the normally high standards that Fielding demands of it's graduates'"


• Dylan, by J-D (part 4b): "'Okay, Dylan, just remember, I’ll do all the talking.' Dylan shrugged as Kris rang the doorbell. He stood silently next to his brother until a plain young woman opened the door, and continued to stand there silently as Kris began his pitch for the long-distance phone cards they were supposed to be trying to sell, asking the woman about the quality of the service she was getting and suggesting the importance of clarity of reception."


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 3 Rise Above the Bollocks, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Then through the din of stuck up elitism Ethan heard the cutting voice of Aunt Mildred call out, 'And what about your sister’s child dear Kay, Ethan was it? I’d like to ask him a few questions...' Ethan sighed inwardly and readied himself for his auto-da-fe and wondered if he should bother to pray despite being an atheist."


• Ethan Yeager in Lawndale: Ch 4 Power to the Snark, by Shiva (parts 1 and 2): "'I have to admit that I’m still impressed that Trent and your Dad were willing to risk life, limb, and the Lexus into order to find us.' Jane noted as an afterthought. 'Families are like that.' Daria added and then blushed when she realized what she had said without thinking." (Part 2)



• Found, by DIsaac (part 1): "I still remember that day. I should. I mean it was the day that changed the course of my life forever. I mean not many people have a story of finding themselves on a milk carton."


• Germination Mastication (Pie, Pie, My Darling), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "'I knew you guys would screw this up,' said Daria, waddling up to the dimwitted duo. 'I just had to see for myself.' 'What do you know about nachos, Daria?' Butt-head asked, oblivious to the fact that, given her girth, she likely knew a lot about nachos."


• Heil Li! (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Anthony DeMartino gave a lusty leer to the asian sex kitten that had just entered his bedroom wearing nothing but a leather harness, an SS officer's cap, a hitler mustache, and jackboots."


• The Hounds (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'That's right bitch, scream all you want, no one's coming to help you.' Mack said with a dark smile, 'In fact I'll scream with you, AHHH SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP!'"


• Into the Black, Into the Blue, Chapter 2, by Lord Yellowtail (part 2): "The blow sent Number 973 into the Land of Nod even as she raised her free hand and flicked her wrist, a pair of querangs whizzing through the air, disarming the remaining two agents in a cacophony of pained screams and breaking fingers. As they staggered, she drew her primed crossbow in a smooth motion and fired twice. A pair of thwips, and the newly disarmed duo went down in drowsed drug derived daze. Question blinked. Accidental alliteration. Need to sleep soon. ... There it is again. Damn."


• Ms. Barch's Secret Meal (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Janet Barch savored the flavor as she slowly chewed the meat in her mouth and her ears drank in the screams of pain coming from the filthy, MAN she had chained to the table."


• Oh Quinn You're So Silly (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Reven384 (COMPLETE!): "'Oh Quinn you're so silly,' Stacy said ignoring the girl's muffled sounds of protest, 'You really need to stop being so mean. You know I hate having to gag you.'"



• Sating Hunger (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Benedika Johanssen wriggled and moaned in ecstasy as she felt the two she had consumed earlier, fighting a vain fight for their lives inside her engorged stomach."


• Save the Last Trance for Me, by jtranser: "Jane reached out and gently held Amelia's hand: 'No, no, We just need you as weather-sensitive subjects for a series of low frequency EMF experiments, that's all. Although in your case, Amelia, you might want to change your sex to male to deliver any associated prophecies that might be generated as a result, especially those involving weather field emissions...' Daria laughed, and added: 'And pay special attention to the nocturnal ones, as they can be real hard to deal with...'"


• Scarlett the Dark Fairy Meets the Crossed (Hell is Crossed People), by Aloysius (COMPLETE!): "Scarlett the Dark Fairy never ever thought that she'd be the first line of defense for a rescue shelter. If you had asked her about that before all this happened, she would have laughed at you, kicked you in the balls and taken your wallet. Though not necessarily in that order."


• Some More Mack Torture (of a different sort) and Oh the things I do for that Silly Quinn (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Reven384 (COMPLETE!): "Mack struggled against his ropes as he tried to force his way out of his current predicament. He opened his mouth to make a sound but a larger person knocked the breath out of him and he felt a wet tongue enter his mouth."


• Step Up (Iron Chef: 'Sloane Trouble' Expansion), by JoeMerl (COMPLETE!): "'Mom! Mom!' 'What is it, Tom?' Kay asked, startled as her son stormed into the study. Tom motioned accusingly out of the room. 'Dad just said---he told me---'" (Continued by Roentgen) (Continued by Brother Grimace)


• Three J's and an Upchuck (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "'We have been watching you for some time now Chuck.' Jamie said while he and Jeffy moved to look at him next to Joey. 'We've seen you letch on every single girl... Even Daria and Jane.' Jeffy added with a shiver of disgust. 'And it's... Clearly an act Upchuck... Just like how we act like fools for Quinn in public...' Joey noted with an ironic grin."



• Tiffany... Oh Tiffany... (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Her body was still warm as it lay on the bed, her nakedness was a wonder to behold, he ran his fingertips down her perfect skin, skin that he would ensure stayed perfect, forever."


• Unnamed story (PLOT BUNNIES: free to good home), by Trscroggs: "'So I have to ask, just because I like hearing the stories, how did you lose the eye?' Jane asked her new friend Daria. Daria’s smirk, seemingly a default expression, didn’t waver. 'I had to sacrifice it at Mímir's Well to gain wisdom in my bid to replace Odin as the leader of the gods.'"


• Unnamed story (PLOT BUNNIES: free to good home), by Trscroggs: "Maddie: So an eight year old becomes the host of a True Rune, the youngest host ever, and yet for almost eight years the fact that you had one of the runes went completely unnoticed. Daria: (raises a finger) Second youngest. The True Rune of Life and Death, aka Souleater, was tricked into a two year old for about three months. Well the fact is that I didn’t use the rune often enough for it to be noticed. I’m just grateful it’s allowed me to age, mostly. "


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by 45Ranger (COMPLETE!): "Upchuck is talking to Daria at the Pizza King. 'Daria... I'm pregnant.'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by BrownEyedBagel (COMPLETE!): "Daria savored the taste of blood to it's fullest. Tom was on the floor recoiling in pain."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): "(at Cashman's department store) (Helen emerges from a dressing room, wearing a blue version of her red 'power suit') Helen - What do you think of this one? (Daria is nowhere to be seen.)"


• WaM, Ma'ams, Dark Paladin, by DeacBlue (part 6): "She was interrupted by a squeal from Stacy. 'Buffy! We're meeting Buffy!' A front hatch popped up and she squealed - again. 'Daria! That's Buffy Summers!' The now-identified Buffy blushed. 'Well, Buffy Rosenberg-Summers, but close enough. And I have a fan. How - neat.' She took Daria's hand. 'And I'll take a stab and guess that you're Daria?'"


• We Only Hurt the Ones We Love, by deneich (part 11): "As we were talking a girl on the other team called to Stacey. Stacey, looked at the girl nervously; obviously, not thrilled at being addressed by her. 'So, Stacey' the girl started 'how does it feel, having to hang around with losers? Don't worry, though, even losers like them will get tired of your clingy, needy personality and then you'll be all alone.'"


• Who's Your Daddy (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: The Morning After), by Reven384 (COMPLETE!): "It had been about two months since her father died of a heart attack. The whole house mourned and Daria and Quinn took it really hard. While that was happening Helen started dating again. She kept her new boyfriend a secret until she eloped. Daria sat in the living room her mouth hung agape in abject horror. Quinn screamed. Daria didn't blame her."