All I Know Is What I Read in the Papers

Humorist Will Rogers is the source of the title quote for this day. (The full quote, actually, is: All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.) The Wall Street Journal came into being exactly 121 years ago today. In addition, Daria's Sick, Sad Life Planner marks today as important in another newsy way (see at upper right). I bet her tushie was sore when she was done. There seems to be some disagreement on whether she ended her ride on the 8th or the 13th.

N0oOZ!

• Speaking of news, if you are a fan of LOGO TV, some episodes of Daria are being run there today. Check the link for the schedule.
• Lord Akiyama has presented the fandom with a new artwork: Mustang Ridin'!
  

Stay tooned.... for fanfic. (Not yet done with the whole list. There were too many new ones!)

LATER: Okay, now I'm done... for a while.

FF.net

• The InDark, by Mediancat (Parts 23 and 24): "Stop the car as soon as you can," Daria said to Jane while gritting her teeth. "What?" Jane asked. "Next exit. Pull off. Park as soon as you can." "Dream?" "Dream." "Pulling off," Jane said. She was in the lead, so Oz, driving the van behind them, would follow them off. They'd planned for this to happen. "You going to be okay, amiga?" (Daria/ Buffy the Vampire Slayer/ Angel/ Dick Tracy)
  

PPMB

• The Continuing Adventures of an ANGRY!!! Young Man, by Charles RB (Parts 1 and 2): There was a war on. They called it a game but that was hippie bullcrap. This was a war. Years at that damn military school had taught him about war and the importance of overwhelming force, pre-emptive strikes, saturation assaults. There was an enemy. They had to be destroyed. DESTROY THEM AAAALL! With a roar akin to Godzilla hearing someone insult his mum, Anthony roared down the pitch and hit the Oakwood quarterback with bone-shattering force. I was not exaggerating about “bone-shattering force.” The quarterback was replaced with a terrified, second-rate substitute, and Anthony DeMartino was cheered once more as the greatest linebacker Lawndale High had ever had. (Part 2)
• Daria and Trent Forever, by Malakite (Parts 1 and 2): Daria rolled over to look at Trent's peaceful sleeping face. She could easily stare at that heavenly visage for hours on end, and what's more Trent could sleep through those hours without inconveniently waking up to catch her. Not that she'd really mind if he did. She decided that just now she'd like to be caught, so she reached over to the appropriate part of her lover's anatomy and began gently tickling. Her lips twisted into an eager little smile as Trent slowly began to stir. Across town, at the Boston Fine Arts College, Tom Sloane, a student from good old Bromwell University,heir to a fabulous fortune, and all round nice guy found himself once again helping Jane Lane move into a dormitory. On the last occasion he'd had to do this, he was quite surprised, even shocked by Jane's behavior, although the experience hadn't been at all unpleasant.
  
• Daria/Dorian, by LadieT (continued): Dorian's first few days back were a stressful nightmare but as the week ended, he seemed to be settling back into a normal routine. His mood was greatly improved over that weekend by his parents and Jane. On Saturday, Jake took him computer and television shopping. This was followed by a bad movie marathon at Jane's house all day Sunday. Even with Helen calling every couple of hours, it was the first time since the change that Dorian felt relaxed. The two exchanged witty banter while watching some of the worst films ever put on video. Trent even joined them for one movie before heading to the basement for practice. Dorian left around ten thirty, shortly after Jane had fallen asleep leaning against him.
• Finn Morgendorffer 52: With Extra Bitters, by HolyGrail2007 (Parts 2 to 4): “Are you sure I can’t have just an eensy...” Jake started as he pulled up to Winged Tree. “No!” Helen insisted from the passenger side as she looked in the mirror to check her makeup. “We are going to be gracious, engaging guests.” “But I can do that better if I’ve had...” “No!” Helen stated firmly. The gate guard gave them no hassle once he learned their names, and Jake steered the Lexus into a great parking space. “I’m glad Finn helped you with your suit. The last thing we need is to have your collar crooked.” “Dammit, Helen, I can dress myself!” Jake insisted. “Be on your best behavior, Jakey. If we impress the Sloanes, they’ll ask us back for another gala. And it can turn into the business you want.” (Part 3) (Part 4)
  
• First Born, by RLobinske (Part 3): Jane pulled into the spot and saw a small sign that read, Reserved for Dr. Karen Adler, DVM. "Now we know why you went to school all those years," Jane said. "Reserved parking." Sitting behind Karen, Derek said, "And she doesn't even have to pay for it. Unlike me." "Sucks being undereducated, doesn't it?" said Jane. Derek patted his chest, puffed it out and said, "With three Doctors in the car, someone has to be the Master."
• Into the Fray, by Minx (Part 13): Me and my big fat stupid mouth… I wish I could go back and tell myself not to mention the roadhouse to the rest of the group. Unfortunately I can’t and that is why we found ourselves crouched in the bushes staring out at a huge truck stop that was planted on the main highway. We spent most of the day there, watching a stream of trucks going in and out and trying to find ways to attack. Daria had realized that as it got later and the sun began to lose its heat, the troop carriers began to stop longer. The soldiers seemed to be less alert, less jumpy and they spent more time inside the diner. As night fell we decided to stay, I should have known right then that there was no backing out. I knew the boys had something planned and I now had no choice but to agree with it. I had the feeling that both Daria and Jane were starting to agree with the boys, I could tell by the way their eyes lit up when Trent and Jesse would come up with different ways to attack. (FF.net)
  
• Judith Strikes! Community Service, by Brother Grimace (COMPLETE!): "All I did was meet a girl I thought was cool and I went out with her for a while. We started to get bored with each other. It happens all the time. It's nobody's fault." "Oh yeah? Would you still be bored with her if I weren't around?" "Probably. And more to the point, she'd be bored with me. It's got nothing to do with you." "Good. Because I'm not interested in you, and I'd be stabbing my friend in the back if I even considered it." "Exactly. And what kind of a jerk would that make me?" "Exactly." "All right then." "Okay." "Dammit! Dammit, dammit, dammit!" "I liked it, too." "That was definitely not funny." "I gotta go!" "You got that right."
• Judith Strikes! The Light of a Burning Darkness, by Charles RB (COMPLETE!): Lawndale was full of raw-throated, frightened screaming, and the streets and gardens were clogged with crashed cars and corpses; in the distance, the neighbouring city glowed with a thousand fires; somewhere, an air-raid was sounding and dull explosions could be heard. Judith didn’t notice that for a minute. She noticed that the sun was black.
  
• Judith Strikes! Mack Dynamite vs. the Crimson Phantom, by Erin M. (Part 1): Mack Dynamite pulled his silver Cadillac El Dorado up to the curb in front of the 23rd Precinct, made sure his Afro was still in place, then leaped out of the drivers seat, gold lame bellbottoms flashing in the afternoon sun. He straightened the lapels of his brown courderoy jacket, smoothed his mustache and strutted his way into the station. Captain DeMartino was downing his customary handful of antacid tablets when Mack Dynamite strolled into his office, threw himself into a chair, and put his custom Italian Beatle boots up on the desk. "What it is, Chief!" Mack Dynamite said by way of greeting, flashing the million dollar smile that had charmed many a man into being his friend, and had also charmed many a fine foxy lady out of her unmentionables. Too bad DeMartino was too much of a crusty bastard for it to work on him.
• Life, But Not As You Know It, by Phoenix (Part 1): Elsie felt her body quake from the amount of fury that Madison had conjured with-in her. She left the group and made a bee-line for the powder room, but not before making a detour to the coat-room to retrieve her purse. As she entered the strangely unattended room, she heard moans of lust coming from the back corner. Curious, she walked toward the sounds and she found her father with a woman who was barely out of puberty in a hot and heavy make out session. Upon her discovery she merely raised an eyebrow, “Trading up I see?” she said in a flat, monotonous tone. Her father froze and began a series of stuttered throaty sounds before Elsie cut him off with a limp flick of her wrist, “Hey, I understand. There’s only so much Dr. Shar can do before Mom looks like a wax reject from Tussaud's, it makes sense to trade her in for a newer model."
  
• The Other Side of Time: Unfinished Business, by The Sidhe (continued): The Morgendorffer residence was a hive of activity this morning. Helen, Jake and Quinn were making final preparations for the drive down to Mount Folly, as were Tom and Elsie Sloane. They had finally accepted Richard’s invitation to spend some time in the old Georgian-era plantation house, with Elsie even having come out of her fugue state enough to help Tom pack his silver Aston-Martin. As Richard had suspected, the act of being able to finally say farewell to their dead parents had managed to kick-start the long, slow process of healing, and he believed that some time away from Lawndale on the James-York peninsular, with an occasional side-trip into Richmond, would be of great benefit to the two younger Sloanes.
• Politricks are Not for Kids, by Brian Taylor (continued): "'In our culture, we have the expectation that we'll find familiar patterns in our leaders' decisions. We expect our male mandarins to place a premium on action over discussion, and our women rajas to sit around and talk through all the available options before making a move. What sort of leader is our Tom Sloane? With his every effeminate word, he slows himself to be a leaky vessel who can't stop running his mouth off in public about his policies although he never actually acts upon them.' How am I supposed to respond to shit like that?" (moar story)
  
• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (Part 14): "He's not exactly antisocial. Sam's really very nice, but he doesn't understand people too well, so he avoids them as much as possible. He doesn't have a lot of friends, but he is very close to a few people. I think that I'm one of the few people over the years that he's reached out to. There's nothing mean or sarcastic about him, so sometimes I wonder why he likes me. We talked about some of that stuff a little bit before we went out for breakfast, and-" "Wait, you two went out for dinner last night, and then this morning you went out for breakfast..." Jane paused in mid-sentence, then let out a delighted squeal. "Daria!" A low groan came out of Daria's mouth. "Jane, get your mind out of the gutter. Look, I spent the night here in his room, but I didn't sleep with him. I fell asleep while we were watching a movie and he put me in his bed and then he spent the night on the floor. He was a complete gentleman." "Oh." Jane sounded disappointed.
• Sleepwalker, by Jim North (continued): Sleep eluded Stacy once more as she was brought fully awake by the sound of a girl screaming. At first she thought it had just been part of a half-dream that had been forming as she had been drifting off, but the scream came again with the full clarity of reality behind it. It was somewhere outside and somewhat distant, but unmistakable. None of the other girls in the room stirred at the noise, so Stacy quietly slipped out of bed and padded over to the window in her stocking feet. Once there, she slowly parted the curtains and peered out into the night to see nothing but the empty parking lot. The screams continued and Stacy was about to dismiss them as the sounds of a TV in one of the other rooms turned up too loud when she suddenly recognized the squeaky voice strained by fear and pain as Brittany's.
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Jane pregnant at the same time), by NightGoblyn (COMPLETE!): "So... um... you wanna go out some time?" Jane looked at the young man a moment, then glanced around the mostly empty campus. It was early evening and there were very few students milling around, but she didn't want to be overheard by the few that were. She reached out and grabbed his sleeve and tugged him off the concrete path and across the grass to a big oak tree. She turned and looked up at him, moistening her lips nervously. "Is there a... should I have not... I didn't make you mad, did I?" "No, no," Jane said, trying to smile encouragingly. "I'd love to go out with you, but there's a couple of things you need to know first. I don't want you to find out by surprise and be freaked out." "Um... okay." "I've got a kid."