Hooray.

The poster hanging above Daria's bedroom desk depicts author Franz Kafka, who would be 127 years old today if he hadn't died first. He is famous for his unique existential works that place human protagonists into bizarre and often unresolvable circumstances, such as in The Metamorphosis, in which Daria turns into a bug. And there was great rejoicing.

It was a year ago today that the future release of the Daria DVD set was finally announced. And there was great rejoicing.

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• Delete the Press, by Dennis (COMPLETE!): "Representative Landon, is there any truth to the rumor that you're considering a run for Senate in the near future?" "I can safely say I'm not considering a run this year. As far as the future, it would be irresponsible of me to speculate. Right now, I'm focusing on doing the best job I can for my constituents." "So you're not ruling out a Senate run in 2012?" "As I said, it's far too early to rule anything in or out for 2012. I'm not thinking about the Senate at all. I'm thinking about the job I was elected to do in the House of Representatives." "But wouldn't it be a good time for you to run? After all, your profile has never been higher." "Are you talking about the DVDs from that stupid reality show I was forced to take part in as a teenager?"
• Daria/Dorian, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): A couple of minutes later, Kevin and Brittany walked in along with Jodie and Mack. Brittany looked over at him and waved. Jodie and Mack grinned as they sat down in front of Jane and Dorian. A few moments later, the bell rang. Mr. DeMartino closed the door and made his way to the front of his desk. "Class, we have a NEW STUDENT here today. Dorian Morgendorffer. Dorian, raise your right hand." Great... welcome to Lawndale Hell all over again. Dorian reluctantly raised his right hand. "Well, Dorian, as long as you have your hand raised. Before our break last week, we were discussing the Amendments of the US Constitution. Perhaps you think its UNFAIR to be asked a question on your first day of class." "Excuse me?" Deja vu. Dorian waited for the question. (FF.net)
  
• First Born, by RLobinske (Part 2): Hearing the warning, Jane slowed her minivan down to just below the speed limit to avoid unwanted attention. Not that the brightly colored van didn't attract attention with the large "Three Art Chicks" logo painted on each side. Except for her hair worn longer and in a single ponytail, she was little different from her college days. Even the mischievous glint remained in her blue eyes. "Just the radar detector," she said into the miniature headset fitted to her right ear. "Karen warned me about the small towns around here and I'm taking her at her word."
• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (Part 13): "Hey," she said softly as she approached him. Sam merely smiled back—at least now he could recognize her. "So, where are we going?" "We are meeting at a Chinese restaurant on Massachusetts Avenue, near the campus. It is called Mary Chung's. I have eaten there before, the food there is very good. Do you like Chinese food?" "Yeah, I guess so." Daria sort of liked the stuff, but after that weird dream she had of meeting holidays and traveling to Holiday Island via the Good Times Chinese Restaurant, she had a few misgivings. "You'll have to tell me what to order, though."
• Sleepwalker, by Jim North (continued): As soon as she was sure all of her roommates were asleep, Brittany poked her head out the door and scanned the area with the eyes of a hawk. A nighthawk. That could see well at night. Confident that her movements would be unobserved, she slid out and locked the door behind her. With careful tip-toe steps and a continued alertness, she made her way to the corner of the building. Only a few doors separated her room and that corner, but her insistence on a high level of stealthiness made the journey stretch out over several minutes. She made not a sound, not a whisper, not a—
• Unnamed story (Iron Chef: Daria and Jane pregnant at the same time), by Minx (COMPLETE!): Daria set a weary gaze upon her family, the time had come. It was now or never. Oh how she wished never was a possibility. Unfortunately, time had run out she only had another three, maybe four weeks and it would be obvious. Daria inhaled deeply and turned to her bemused parents, "Mom, Dad..." her gaze dropped to the ground, unable to look them in the eyes, "I'm pregnant."
  

35 Years of Wedded Something-or-other

It's been thirty-five years to the day. How time flies. Congratulations, Helen and Jake, for making it this long without going completely insane. Or driving your children insane. Good show. Click on the image for the full-size thing.

We ought to make this a fandom holiday. I should check to see what fanfics have been done about Helen and Jake's wedding or whatever it was. BRB.

LATER: Back. Here are some fanfics that mention or describe the commitment ceremony, however briefly, in no particular order.

• Psychoed, by Thomas
• Fireworks, by C.E. Foreman
  
• Finn Morgendorffer 2: Let's Get Physicals! by HolyGrail2007
• Finn Morgendorffer 50: Matters of State, by HolyGrail2007
• Falling into College 24: Silver Lining, by RLobinske (25th anniversary in 2000)
• Falling into College 72: Valley of Love and Delight, by RLobinske (Daria and Michael got married on this day seven years ago!)
• Knockin' on Heaven's Gate, by Northampton
  
• Driven Wild Universe: The Age of Cynicism, by Kara Wild (see end notes)
  
• The Winters of Those Gone Before, by Brother Grimace (X-rated, so no link)
• Snowflakes
• and a nameless but wonderful ficlet by A.J.
  

Some years ago I recall reading another by Mike Xeno, but it seems to have vanished. Rats. Moar soon.

ANOTHER LATE NOTE: Found it!

• Committed, by Mike Xeno

Hooray!

YET ANOTHER LATE NOTE: Almost OVER 175,000 HITS on this blog! Thank you, everyone!

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• Daria: Hunter 6—Infectious, by Jim North (continued): "Mack Daddy? Hey, Mack Daddy! Can you hear me, Mack Daddy? Hellooooooo? Mack Daddy, Mack Daddy, Banana Fanna Bo Baddy, Me Mi Mo Maddy! Mack Daddy!" Finally losing his temper, Mack slammed the bottom of his fist against the transparent plasteel wall of the cell. "Shut up!" he yelled at the man on the other side. "I told you to stop calling me that!" Kevin Thompson's eyes grew wide at the display, and he held his hands up in surrender. "Sorry, bro! Didn't mean to bother you, bro! You okay, bro? Are we cool?"
• NEW! Finn Morgendorffer 50: Matters of State, by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): “Well done, Finn.” Rita kissed him on the cheek. “Ballsy move, throwing to that guy,” Amy remarked. It was praise, in her own special way. “This is an accomplishment you’ll remember your whole life, I still can’t believe it’s happened,” Helen noted. She was looking very oddly at Aunt Rita. Wouldn’t she be surprised to figure out Rita’s the one who stood up to Mr. O’Neill and broke him down.
• NEW! Sleepwalker, by Jim North (continued): "Heeeey, babe," Kevin Thompson said as smoothly as he could, his dopey bedroom eyes in full effect. "Yes, Kevvie?" Brittany Taylor cooed back, her bubblepop voice turned just a couple of notches down from its usual squeak. "I totally got something, like, extra special for this field trip." Brittany's heart skipped a beat as visions of jewelry and other delights began to dance in her head. "Oh?" she said nonchalantly. "And what would that be, sweetie-Kevs?" "Well, I'll show you," he said seductively, then reached up to grab his duffel bag from the overhead rack. He pulled the zipper across with a flourish, then slowly put his hand inside and pulled out a wrapped package to hand to his excited girlfriend. "Oh, Kevvie!" Brittany squealed as she tore open the wrapper. "It's... it's... it's a paintball mask?!"
  
• Stolen, by Malakite (Part 1): She had been in science class, twirling a finger through her blonde hair as she listened with half an ear to those two little trolls give an offensive but technically correct account of the shuttle disaster. Then the little pyros had set off a firecracker... and then... and then... she decided to look around. At first she didn't see anything. She came to believe it was because there was nothing to see, then at last she realized with a sense of somewhat dull shock that she had no eyes to see with.
• Unnamed story (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by LSauchelli (teaser): Daria touched the wall where the vortex was supposed to be. She couldn't find any way to activate it, she guessed there was some sort of password that opened the portal. Not that she wanted to have anything to do with it just yet. "You're still hurt from your encounter with the Joker. I will be up all night, so I want someone to watch over my sister." "But—" "I pay you to do what I say, not what you find convenient," she said and sighed. "Go, sleep now, help Quinn later."

Horsing Around

Today is supposed to be (according to some historians and ancient sources) the 3,194th anniversary of the day the Trojan horse entered Troy, and Troy fell. (Daria mentions the horse in "The Big House"). Interesting, this occurs just before the Kentucky Derby. Oh! And I have the perfect picture for that event, coming later!

But today is also someone's birthday. Who? You guessed it! It's Willem de Kooning's birthday! He would have been 106. You probably remember his photo under Jane's bed in The Daria Diaries. That Jane even knows who this guy is was one of the reasons I believe her IQ was in the same ballpark as Daria's, even if she wasn't any good at math. (See here for details.)

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• Correction, by LadieT (COMPLETE!): Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane were sitting outside of the pearly gates, waiting for their meeting with St. Peter. The two twenty-year-olds had never met on the Earthly realm. Neither of them had ever left their hometowns. Daria stared down at her sandals. Jane turned to look at her. "So, why are you here?" Jane asked brushing her raven hair away from her cobalt eyes. (FF.net) (OD)
  
• Hand in the Band, by Peapotmaster (Part 1): We see the Daria opening, but instead of the Splendora theme, we hear “Sugar, Sugar” from the Archies. We cut to Daria smirking with the usual logo but with Daria wearing Jughead’s beanie. ACT ONE: “Hell Comes to Lawndale"

Tricks and Treats!

Trick or treat time is here (and time for Daria to add a snarky comment). Hard to imagine Daria, even as a kid, going trick-or-treating. Look at her feet: no boots. Poor kid. You can't kick without good boots. Wonder what she said to greeters when she rang the doorbell.

Quinn at left is dressed for Halloween like Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, who might be unfamiliar to some of you. She was the syndicated hostess for many a late-night fright movie on TV when I was younger. She was (and still is) awesome. Love her accent!

And Dawn is back as her traditional Dawn-o-lantern self, with Walkman attached. Thanks to Pinhead for both images. You rule, dude!

Pinhead has a new Daria image at PPMB: "Just One Kiss?"

Did you ever wonder what Beavis and Butt-head do for Halloween? Watch "Bungholio: Lord of the Harvest" on MTV, for free, right now! (You will have to wait through two other episodes, but that's cool.) If you can't wait, go here and see the whole thing straight out. A rude classic.

Enjoy your candy!

Still On Vacation

Now with color (is that better, TAG?)

Come to think of it, the Morgendorffers weren't much for vacations. During their three years in Lawndale, the closest thing they came to a vacation was their camping trip during "The Teachings of Don Jake". The Daria Diaries mention a canceled cruise vacation, but beyond that, nothing. Okay, Jake and Helen did enjoy their stay at Le Grande in the episode, "Fire!" and Quinn (with Fashion Club in tow) were almost treating it like an in-town vacation.

But really, was Helen that much of a workaholic? Or were there unseen trips to exotic locations with disastrous results that everyone agreed not to mention again?

Hmm, more story potential.

Happy Birthday, Daria! (Part 1)

Today is Daria Morgendorffer's birthday. It's the day that Richard Lobinske picked out for his various fanfics, anyway, so we'll use it for now. Glancing at the birthday photo at right (from The Daria Diaries), we see that Daria wasn't a particularly happy, cheerful, or carefree child even at age one. Quinn's birth was not far away, however, so perhaps she sensed trouble.

Using the most likely birth year for Daria from Richard's exhaustive chronological study, she would be 27 today. This varies, however, even with Richard's stories. Take your pick.

More on Daria's birthday (and her various other birthdays in fanfic) later today. And if you were to meet her today and found yourself overcome with emotion, she has this bit of advice: click here. You were warned.

P.S. Today is also the 145th anniversary of the Gettysburg Address, well worth rereading. It is also World Toilet Day today, but we are not going there despite all the disgusting Beavis and Butt-head pictures and stories I could use, oh the horror. That poor Holiday Island High teen.

Here's Your Week!

A curious twist of fate has made the weekly planners of each of the Morgendorffers unusually accurate this year. Today is October 19th, a Sunday, and that's exactly when the planners shown in The Daria Diaries begin. Richard Lobinske has some comments on this in his chronology essay here, pointing out that the year 1997 also matched these dates. Click on the pic to get the larger (more readable) view.

Curiously, Daria talks about reserving her place at a "Bigfoot convention" on Monday, and it was today 41 years ago when a movie was allegedly taken of a Bigfoot. The film has since proven to be a hoax, but it was fun while it lasted. Say, why hasn't more been done with the Bigfoot idea here? (Nudge, nudge.)

Trey Parker, one of the creators of South Park, turns 39 today.

The list of 2008 visual fanworks has been updated. (SFMB here.) Thank you, Richard Lobinske!

Newest DariaWiki page: Wyatt.


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• Babysitting, by Legendeld (Part 3): “No!” Quinn almost laughed. “I can safely say that Sandi is not gay.”
• Daria: College Pains, by James the Lesser (Part 12): NEW ADDITION! At first Daria told herself it was just a one time thing, but she liked how she felt when high. [This saga began in November 2006 and has just been updated. Read and review!]
• Daylight: Ashes and Kisses, by legendeld (Part 5): A survivor finds his way to the colony—but can he be trusted?
  
• Daylight: When Worlds Divide, by Lorenzo Sauchelli (Part 2): The auburn-haired girl pointed at the yellow sky. "See that? That means it's the end of the world as we know it. Our house isn't safe anymore. Whatever killed Mom and Dad is the least of our problems right now."
• Dealing with the Real World, by magnuskrauss (Intermission): This is getting very creepy (in a good way).
  
• End of the Line, by Legendeld (Parts 8 and 9): “So, how did we do?” “Great. You took out ten highly trained DELPHI SABRE troops and four metahumans in less than... six minutes.” “Do we get a cookie?”
• Origins of the Ringbearers: Let Vengeance Ring, by Richard Lobinske (Parts 10 and 11): Daria said, "You look nervous." "Gee," Jane said, "we're about to head off, just the two of us, to stop one of the biggest badasses in the Multiverse and if we succeed, I have to try to fool his evil minions while you go off and do some twisty-turny time games so that he doesn't exist. Can't imagine why I might be nervous."
  

Grrrl Pwrrr!

Ninety-six years ago today, the Girl Scouts of America was created. About twenty years ago today, Jane Lane was deprogrammed after leaving the Girl Scouts so she would stop singing about John Jacob Jingleheimer etc. (We need more Girl Scout Jane fanfic, hint hint.)

Speaking of Lanes, Wouter has issued an Iron Chef challenge called "The Other Lane Girls," in which he asks all artists to try their hands at drawing Summer and Penny Lane.

Speaking of fan art, Christ Oliver presents "Another kiss... almost!" which is an updated version of a picture he drew of Daria and Jane a while ago. Check it out.

Speaking of other Daria and Jane fanworks:

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• Crouching Monster, Hidden Magic, by LSauchelli (Part 6.1): Messing with insane gods can be hazardous to your health and everything else.
• Size Does Matter, by BlackHole (Part 15): Daria breaks another heart, but it appears that at this high school she's going to break many more. (SFMB version here.)
• Turnabout Confusion, Part II: All The King's Horses, by Dennis (continued): Upchuck as you've rarely seen him: likable.

More later, and always remember this special thought. Cheers!

Alien Nation Continued

Continuing our earlier look at "in canon" extraterrestrials in Daria:

So-called grey aliens are seen a number of times in the Daria show, always in picture form so far as memory serves. They suffer from commitment problems in their love relationships with humans, per the section on Sick, Sad World in The Daria Diaries. A large statue of a greenish grey appears at the UFO conventions in "Esteemsters," and there is also a poster of a grey alien's head in the Tank, Mystik Spiral's black van. What do they want? What are their plans? Why can't they stay faithful to their human spouses? Fanfic authors will have to deal with these burning issues, as the series tells us naught.

Meet Coach Gibson . . . I think

The last of the "Before They Were Daria Stars" flipbook characters on MTV's Daria site is somehow misidentified as Burnout Chick, which she . . . er, he definitely isn't. He is obviously a high-school sports coach who bears a resemblance to the heavy-set faculty member seen on rare occasions in the original series. We get a good glimpse of this latter fellow (short light brown hair, no mustache, blue sweatshirt, whistle on chain, gray sweatpants, sneakers) marching with the striking teachers in "Lucky Strike" (at far left in picture), and we have a distant view of the same figure in "Fizz Ed," standing on the edge of the football field during scrimmage practice. A coach he must be. Maybe he got tired of the mustache.

In The Daria Diaries, Mack makes reference to a coach named Mr. Gibson who is "almost done paying his debt to society" and had assured Mack that when the recruiter used the word "kickback," he thought the man had said "kickoff." It isn't clear who was running the football team while the coach was "paying his debt," but the two MTV books reflect material from the first two seasons of Daria, and the coach appears in the last, fifth season. (CORRECTION: I just spotted him in the Assembly scene of "Esteemsters," on the stage with Ms. Li. Oh, well.) We can hypothesize that the coach seen in the show is Gibson, and between the time he appeared in Esteemsters and the fifth season he got a brief government-funded vacation in the Big House. The character seen in the flipbook could be him as well, before he went to the hoosegow and shaved off his mustache. He remained a background character throughout.

On a related topic, note the presence of two black teachers among the marchers in "Lucky Strike": one short and heavy with glasses and one tall and thin. One of them must be the mathematics teacher, since we never see one in the series, and the other must teach . . . computers? Humanities? Mass media? Band? French? Where the heck are all of the Lawndale High teachers?