No One Expects... THE COUNCIL OF TRENT!

Today is a very important day in history because on this day, only 471 years ago, the Pope sent out letters having to do with... the COUNCIL OF TRENT! (DUH-DUN!)

What exactly those letters said is sort of difficult to figure out. People spoke funny long ago, and the way they wrote is even worse. Perhaps you will have better luck (click here). I do not have an alter ego of Trent as either the Pope or a monk, though there is an image of Jake Morgendorffer as the Pope and one of Kevin Thompson as a medieval monk. Mmm, maybe better to just let that whole thing go and just use a picture of Trent answering his duck phone.

Other than that, not much else went on. Oh, well, yeah, it's National Black Cow Day in the USA. Not a bad idea to make one for yourself. The recipe is at the link.

And now it's time for...

N0oOZ!

• Alert fan Mike Richardson was able to capture an advertisement that formerly ran on The N, announcing Daria's severely edited appearance there. Enjoy the clip!
• Disco316 needs help finding an image or two for a link to the DariaWiki. See what you can do.
• OverlordMikey is looking for an artist or two for help with a Daria project.
  

PPMB

• Bathing with Archimedes, by RLobinske (Part 1): Jake Morgendorffer drove his Lexus down the scenic, suburban street toward his two daughters' new school. To his right, the elder, Daria sat and stared out the side window, feigning disinterest while the younger sat in the backseat showing apprehension. He said, "Girls, I just want you to know your mother and I realize it's not easy moving to a whole new town—especially for you, Quinn, right?" (Daria/Eureka)
• Daria/Dorian, by LadieT (continued): Dorian decided to jog towards Lawndale High. With it being a vacation week, he figured it would be quiet and vacant. As his feet hit the pavement, his mind began to clear. As he continued down the sidewalk, he began to try to figure things out. He became so wrapped up in his thoughts that he didn't hear the footsteps catching up with him from behind. He almost jumped when he felt the tap on his shoulder. "Do my eye deceive me or is a Morgendorffer voluntarily exercising?" Jane smiled. "Mind if I join you?"
  
• The Dream of the White Darkness, by jtranser (continued):"...On the appointed hour, when those who hunt pale visions come forth to feed on the weaker dreams, all will be made ready for the final moments, as the keepers of humanity prepare the keys of their own destruction. O Titan VI, that bringest the end of the world, grant us thy peace."
  
• Finn Morgendorffer 48: Filling Sacks of Failure, by HolyGrail2007 (COMPLETE!): All thoughts of some quiet relaxation at home were dispelled when Finn saw there were guests at the house. I wonder what that all is? he thought. He asked his father, who merely shrugged. There was plenty of space to park the Lexus, however, and Finn found his way inside to see a number of people in the living room, running cables and setting up lights. People barked orders to other people. What the hell is this? he thought. Shooting a movie or something? Don’t be a porno, don’t be a porno.
• Finn Morgendorffer 49: Blessed Be This Meal, by HolyGrail2007 (Part 1): "You’re Helen Morgendorffer, who prosecuted a psychotically evil woman and the regime that allowed her reign for torturing innocent young boys. I mean, all you need is a superhero costume and a catch phrase.” “Well, I don’t think it’s like that. Plus, those superhero costumes are so vulgar.”
  
• For Life, by LSauchelli (Part 2): The first year had been full of a cycle of violence and loneliness. Someone would see in her a weak prey to exploit, and she would show them the error of their ways by smashing their faces to a wall.
• The Game Called Life, by Trscroggs (continued): “That was fun,” Daria exclaimed as she appeared in the White Room. “I don’t usually like those crossover lives, but that one was very entertaining. I got to do interplanetary travel, meet new and interesting people, and was well known throughout the galaxy. Whole interstellar civilizations had specific protocols for my arrival. Why, they would turn out whole fleets to great me.” “You are never getting a yellow ring again,” the Old Man said. [This story appears on FF.net but under different names: "A Game Most Divine" and "Daria's Game of Divinity."]
  
• John Lane 46: Substitute Plans, by RLobinske (COMPLETE!): At his new desk, Kevin looked around the room. "Hey, Jodie. I can't see anyone's test." "That's the idea, Kevin," Jodie said. "You mean, I have to fill out the test myself?" "Yes, Kevin." "Aw, man." Feeling the pressure in her right eye, Jodie closed it and turned away from the class.
• Lost in Space, by Tsrcroggs (Part 1): Jane sat up on the bed and carefully surveyed the room she found herself in. She then asked the first two questions that came to her mind out loud. “How in the hell did I manage to fall asleep on a sci-fi set? And why am I naked?”
• A New Set of Rules, by Dennis (Part 13): It was Colleen, of course, who summed up everyone's feelings with a well-turned one-liner on a warm March morning that carried the promise of spring. “Wow, Daria,” she said as the two walked across the quad, “there are days when you're downright cheerful. Are you sure you haven't abducted by aliens?”
• Raft College: The First Year, by rglovejoy (Part 6): When I was a young girl, Daria wrote, my mother told me three things: if a boy tells me that he's had a vasectomy, he's lying; if I'm at a party and someone hands me a brownie, I shouldn't eat it; and if I were to be stranded somewhere, I should never try to hitch a ride. Until my sophomore year in college, I followed her advice to the letter.
• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Ouch Time), by Ranger Thorne (COMPLETE!): Daria closed the door as Jane stepped into the house. "How is she?" the raven-haired artist asked. Quinn's eyes opened beneath her bandages. Swinging her feet over the side of her bed, she came to her feet and staggered the few steps to the door. "She's okay, on the inside." "People still having to stay with her?" Peeking around the corner, Quinn saw Daria was distracted enough for her to slip into her parents bedroom, then into the bathroom. "No, just keep her from removing her bandages." "That bad?" [Guess the crossover!]
• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: Ouch Time), by Greystar (COMPLETE!): The grizzled Starfleet captain sighed and stood up, inspecting the wreckage of the bar and then looking at the other occupant of the table. The auburn haired young woman tossed back the rest of her beer and tried to clean some of the dried blood from her nose as she inspected her broken glasses.
• The Weed of Crime Bears Glitter Fruit, by Kristen Bealer (Part 1): Kevin Thompson, CONTROL agent 86, sauntered into the Chief's office and leaned against the desk. "I came here as soon as I got your message. What's the emergency?" The Chief held up a hand, expression even grimmer than usual. "Wait until your partner arrives," he replied. "This is very important, and you'll both need to hear it." "Aww, but now I'm curious! Can't I at least have a hint?" (Daria/Get Smart)