Of Music Festivals and Nuts

It's a double episode anniversary today: both "Road Worrier" and "It Happened One Nut" aired on this day in 1997 and 1999, respectively. Two of my all-time favorite lines from Daria came from each of those episodes. The first is "You have to pee, Daria? You can pee behind those trees. See those trees? You can pee behind there!" and the second is "Hey, look! Monster trucks and naked models! Naked, naked, naked!"

Both lines, I've found, are extremely versatile and can be quoted in a wide range of situations.

Anyone have a particular favorite line from either episode? Quote it in the comments while I post the latest fanfic!

• Another Lawndale's Episode, by Silver (part 2): "Things have a bad habit of getting weird when you're not looking. It's sort of like when you sign up for a lit course, and the teacher shows you an episode of South Park instead of going over the reading. That was a fairly accurate descriptor of Daria's morning. Except about a thousand times weirder. After all, mecha do not typically park themselves in front of a sane school on a sane Earth."


• Blood of Doves (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by thatLONERchick (parts 2 and 3): "In perfect sync, the duo eased silently through the shop, checking every shadow for The Employer's men as well as Stacy's friends. The only sound was their shallow breathing as the pair traversed the rows of the seemingly-abandoned art store, and the occasional splat of a drop of sweat hitting the floor. Finally they reached the storeroom door, and Stacy rolled her eyes. Her shoulders sagged visibly, the only clue to her immense relief. It, unfortunately, would be short-lived." (Part 3)


• A Cookie Story (Non-Daria), by Doggieboy (COMPLETE!): "Inside the wrapper was a single chocolate chip cookie. And definitely not the Nabisco/Keebler 'excuses' for a cookie, either. This cookie was large and had at least thirty chocolate chips. This wasn't something to be munched on at the mall, or absently ate while behind the wheel. No, this was something to lose yourself into, to savor its moistness and its chocolate goodness."


• Daria and the 'Rangers' (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by Smijey (COMPLETE!): "Daria stalked alone through the streets of Angel Grove. Ever since the sudden move to the new city without Jane, she had been bereft of companionship and, to her dismay, sank into depression. Sure, the town was a nice place to live -- after all, giant monsters regularly demolished it. But with Jane around, it just wasn't the same thing. Suddenly, and peculiarly, she saw a star fall from the sky. She had to rub her eyes to confirm there wasn't just an unusually-shaped piece of debris in them."


• Daria is Raven's Apprentice, by project pegasus: "Raven: Daria, if things don't turn out well, I just want you to know that I'm sorry. Daria: Hey, this isn't all your fault. Raven: (smiling) Really? Daria: Yeah, we were dumb enough to follow you into this death trap, so in a way this is our faults too."


• Daria, or the Confession of a Single Lonely Male, by Arena del Sur: "My heart is feeding with the constant roar of the engine, exerting for turn four wheels without regret. In the hours of rural sacrifice they are seeing us, like an unattainable dream getting lost, getting lost. In the constant taking and bringing my pajarillo verde, adrift, driving the Accord I'm in full shining, living this dream."


• Daria/Power Rangers: Watching the Watchmen, by Charles RB (parts 1 - 3): "Daria found herself making sarcastic remarks and Quinn-baiting comments on auto-pilot as she tried to figure out a way for all the facts and rumours to make sense. The rest of the family decided it must be a hoax designed to terrorise them – “It's that dastard Saddam, he's fighting dirty this time!” cried her dad – but she could tell her parents wanted to believe it was a hoax rather than actually believed it. It was all confusion and conjuncture until the next day. That was the day a walking skeleton invaded an amusement park on live TV and the Power Rangers stopped him." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Daria the Hoosier, by Doggieboy (part 7): "The woman sat down in a nearby rocking chair and leaned forward slightly. 'You can talk to me, Daria,' she said. 'I may be an adult, but I can listen well and not be judgmental. After all, I do remember what it's like being a teenager.' She waited a few seconds, then added, 'I know that you and Jim are friends, but I also understand that there are some things girls just can't talk to guys about.' She smiled. 'Besides, it's better to get it out of your system.'"


• Daria's Big Hit (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by DIsaac (part 2): "Daria's Blog, The Hollywood Cynic is required reading for lovers of gossip and all thing of pop culture. So her job don't suck too much. It could have been worst - she could have been a teacher."


• Emerald Twilight, by Erin M. (parts 1 - 3): "A cruel smile crossed Rita's face. It was a small smile, but it was infinitely more terrifying than the cackling laugh which usually heralded her good moods. 'I'm more than all right, Fenster. In fact, I feel better than I have in years.' Rita swept an arm around the observation deck. 'I awoke with a moment of clarity, dear Fenster. I felt like my old self again. Like I did before that sanctomonious severed head imprisoned me. And finally, FINALLY, I was able to think clearly about our continued problem with the Power Rangers.'" (Part 2) (Part 3)


• The Enemy (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Daria and Jane were walking along, being sarcastic and whatnot as always. Suddenly, Jane turned her head as they were passing a park and saw a lone chicken standing by the monkey bars. It narrowed its blank eyes at the artist and seemed to sneer. 'Wait a minute,' Jane said, snarling. 'I know that chicken!'"


• Five Minutes to Midnight - 11:55, by untra (parts 12 - 16): "'Um, I... I believe I, uh...' My heart began to race, and the walls began to shake a little. The fluorescent bulbs above seemed brighter all of a sudden, and I continued to stammer mindlessly. Jane reached her hand out and placed it on my shoulder. 'Close your eyes and say what you feel,' Jane whispered." (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16)


• Green Dragon Rising, by Grifter74 (parts 1 - 3): "Grasping her anger like it was a physical object, Daria adjusted her bag and started to head to her new house. As Daria made her way down the stairs, she was bumped into and stumbled down the last few steps. She saw a flash of green cloth, felt a steading hand, and heard a mumbled apology. Glad to have a subject to unleash her anger on, she turned toward her victim, when a cry of 'Amiga' distracted her as she was pulled into a hug." (Part 2) (Part 3)


• Homeless Daria Episode 3: A College Try Gives Me Blisters, by RX-87 (parts 5 - 8): "'Hey, Jane?' Daria said, meekly. 'Yeah?' 'I really am sorry about the other day.' 'It's nothing, don't worry about it. It's cool if you want to have more friends than just me. That'd be pretty creepy, me wanting to keep you all to myself.' Jane laughed." (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8)


• Jane Morgendorffer 2: The Middle School Years, by LadieT (part 3): "One afternoon in early October, Penny took a chance and invited Daria and Trent to spend the night. Much to everyone's surprise, Daria and Trent said yes. That Friday, after school let out, Penny picked up Daria and Trent and brought them back to their place. Daria still refused to go into her old room, so Penny decided they would crash on the living room couches after watching a couple of movies."


• Legion of Lawndale Heroes Mini: Cats Night Out, by RLobinske (part 2): "Even over the din of the party, Stacy's sensitive ears picked up the sound of purring and she quietly moved away from the party to seek out the sound. 'I'm so jealous of Daria finding those cute kittens,' she said to her self while listening, and also using her heightened smell to locate the cats. 'Oh,' Stacy said, surprised to see Fran almost asleep between the felines. 'That's where you got off to.' Fran said, 'Hi, Stacy. I'm still not comfortable around crowds, but I found a couple of friends to keep me company.'"


• Not So Different 58: 'Takes A Licking ...', by J-D (COMPLETE!): "The trouble was that although Sonny wasn't talking about the story to Jane or to Tom, he couldn't stick to a resolution never to refer to it again. He found himself raising the subject of his writing ability with his father. Luckily it only set the man off on a rant about the lack of qualification of teachers for judging such things, the specific he had in mind emerging as a teacher at his military school who hadn't liked a song Cadet Morgendorffer had written for a school musical. Sonny abandoned his father mid-rant. He would be better off letting Tom read the story."


• Not So Different 59: Stretching Limits, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Enjoyable though it was seeing Li squirm, Sonny did feel slight misgivings of his own at becoming a strikebreaker. He quelled them with the reflection that it wouldn't take much experience of his presence in the faculty lounge to make the principal desperate to settle with the union on any terms. Besides, he had to think about the effect on Quinn."


• Not So Different 60: False Impressions, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "Sonny held up a hand to check her. 'Does Quinn look really bad in this picture?' 'Well—um—I guess so—I mean, I don't know—Quinn said it made her face look like one big freckle and—' Sonny held up his hand again. 'Your secret and your picture are safe from me. On condition I get the chance to look at it some time.' Stacy nodded breathlessly."


• Not So Different 61: Rivals For Attention, by J-D (COMPLETE!): "'Mom, now that Quinn ... says she's got a steady boyfriend, are you going to invite him to dinner as well? You know, to encourage her? You did tell her that once she had a steady boyfriend you'd love to invite him for dinner, and that's when she got one. And with her history she probably needs the encouragement.' 'You want to encourage your sister and her new steady boyfriend? That's what you want? Out of pure altruism?' Sonny looked at his mother. 'You're not going to believe that, are you.'"


• PIGS in Space (Plot Bunny Murder), by Roentgen: "'It must be some really crappy holiday,' Daria said. 'Listen. What kind of - ?' 'I'm not a bloody holiday,' the young man said. 'I'm England!' 'England?' Daria said. 'The entire country? That's not even possible.' 'Why not? You accepted Cupid and St. Patrick's Day, why not a country?'"


• Rita's Revenge (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by OverlordMikey (COMPLETE!): "Rita's eye twitched and her teeth clenched. “Sure Brian, but aren't you forgetting something?” He looked at for a moment with a stupid ass look on his face like he was king of the world. She wanted to say “Listen you ugly pea-brained cave-man at the very least you could say please!” but she just shrugged and got up and got him the beer, however Rita had different plans..."


• Rude Awakening Ep. 7: Don't Sign Me Up!, by DIsaac (part 1): "JODIE: Alright, I have one more thing to cover before we are done. We need to talk about our company's involvement in the community. (EVERYBODY groins with disgust at the idea)"


• Singed Rainbow!verse Short: Daria's Revenge, by Lord Yellowtail (COMPLETE!): "'Jase? Jason! Snap out of it, bro,' Zack whispered under his breath, his normally wide and shining grin tight and grim. 'Time to face the music.' Jason suppressed a cringe, both at their fate and Zack's horrible sense of humor. He was the Red Ranger. He would not show fear in the face of his enemy. 'I can't believe I didn't see it coming,' he bemoaned."


• Unnamed story (Crossovers Still Crossing Over), by JohnHWatson (COMPLETE!): "A ragged young woman, ignoring the armed agents, walked up to the glowing, apparently iced-over old Galaxie and slipped into the driver's seat. She caressed the steering wheel, and smiled seraphically. Trent Lane shouted out, 'Janey! What are you doing?' 'I thought I'd take it for a spin!' she called, happily."


• Unnamed story (Iron Chef - Jodie the Inventor), by Chris Tucker (parts 3 - 6): "Jane's 'office' was huge. 20 feet on a side. Half the room was taken up with a drafting table and blackboards, and several lab tables. Bookcases full of reference works and journals lined the walls. The other half was graced with a large steel desk, a low table with several chairs around it, more bookcases and an ancient, battered leather couch. An equally ancient refrigerator and a complex of laboratory glassworks and a Bunsen burner filled a small table. It was the can of coffee and the bag of sugar that was the indication that the glassware was some manner of coffee maker." (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)


• Unnamed story (Scenes That Should Be: Breakfast of Zombie Champions), by Jim North (COMPLETE!): "'What the hell?!' the raven-haired girl screamed in shock and anger. Even though she had already been curled into a ball in the corner of the room, Stacy somehow managed to shrink back even further in the face of her girlfriend's sudden fury. 'It's- it's not-' she stammered. 'I didn't-'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria fanfic should have: It's Friday!!), by midnightstorm (COMPLETE!): "Jane looked at Brittany oddly. 'Brittany, what are you doing?'"


• Your Local News, by Lord Yellowtail (COMPLETE!): "VJ shook her head to clear her thoughts, and turned back to look at the TV. She only had a few seconds to stare at it before her Daddy squeaked and fumbled for the remote and turned it off, and her eyes went wide. 'Daddy,' she said, padding over to him on bare feet, enjoying the feeling of carpet between her toes and making sure to avoid the spilled martini, 'who's Eric Sch -- Schrec --' she huffed and gave up, pushing her bushy hair out of her eyes in frustration. She couldn't figure out how to pronounce that. 'Who's that Eric guy, and why were they showing him with a picture of Mommy?'"


• Zombie Cards...or, A New Weapon, by Doggieboy (part 1): "For a few seconds, she listed carefully, but could only hear the people inside the school building. Many people criticized Angela Li for the money she spent in making Lawndale High an actual fortress. That included soundproofing. When it all came in handy, however, many people praised her for her insight and dedication in seeing it through. Which made her trip to New York City the day before the dead rose kind of ironic."