Jake is Not Amused, Either

Today is the anniversary of Queen Victoria's coronation in 1838. Jake's doing his best, but I'm sure I've seen better impersonations of the monarch.

More recently, today is also the 12th anniversary of the episode "Psycho Therapy," which was great just for the role-playing sequence alone. And who could forget Tom's fifteen minutes of fame as a butt wiggler? (In fairness, it was easier on the eyes than O'Neill's ever was.)

Fanfic Update!

• At the Crossroads...(Chapter 12), by oni (part 1): "The days flew off the calendar and before long it was Thanksgiving. It was morning time at the Griffin household and Sandi was helping her mother prepare food, since she didn’t need the crutches anymore. Things may have changed for the better between her mom and her, but Linda’s temper went off for other reasons now..."


• Careful What You Wish For (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Monday, Monday), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Daria placed the phone in the cradle and slowly pulled her hand back. She stared at the construct of plastic and metal for a moment, then swung her legs up onto her bed and flopped back against the pillow. Her eyes strayed to the crack in the ceiling, the stories she and Jane would fabricate to go with the changing shapes in the plaster. But she had not seen Jane outside of school for weeks."


• Daria Blade: Book One, by peapotmaster (part 1): "'You’re going to pay for what you and your goons did to my family, you son of a bitch,' Daria got up, as she rose using her sword. She had a glare at Axel, as she roared at him, charging at him at full speed."


• Daria is Raven's Apprentice, by project pegasus: "Starfire: Friend Raven, this is a mistake. You cannot do this! Raven: (ashamed of herself) We don’t have any other choice. Starfire: There is always choice! The Titans were formed to fight people like Mr. Cashman! He stole Miley Cyprus’ money!"


• Family New, by RLobinske (part 6): "Mr. Vitale said, 'However, she never settled on guardian for the children. This is a little awkward, but she was uncomfortable with recommending either you two or Jake's sister. Helen had contacted a couple called the Yeagers, but they never gave a clear answer.' Rita and Amy looked at each other for several moments. Amy then said, 'I suppose we deserved that.'"


• Family Reunion, by januense (part 7): "'Hey, uncle G!...' greeted Trent '... good morning. Why are you carrying your special occasion artillery?' He stepped into the room, crossing his arms, putting the huge gun in the notch of the left one, as if he was holding a newborn baby. 'Well... there are some annoying little pests in the house. I wanted to set some traps, but I changed my mind... we didn't have a little family hunt in ages, so we're gonna eradicate them in the old fashioned way... nothing's better than some indoor sport and family bonding.' he loudly exclaimed, grinning."


• Full of Esteem (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Monday, Monday), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Timothy O'Neill cackled with glee at the heavily pregnant figures strapped to their pretty lacy pink beds, reminding himself once more that he was doing the right thing by holding all of them against their will."



• Getting to be One with Nature (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Monday, Monday), by DIsaac (COMPLETE!): "As Jane vomit the contents of last night'd dinner due the site that was before them. Her friend , Daria just mumbled to her self 'I know I can't unseen this but dammit I really do. Where the hell is Ms. Li when you need her?'"


• The Hearts Within, by neonhomer (part 4): "I walked over to the table and sat down. 'Where’s mom?' 'She’s on the phone with Stacy’s mother.' Dad said as he folded his paper and set it down. He lowered his voice. 'Hear she didn’t take it too well when she found out.' 'No. She didn’t.' I told him. 'I could have sworn for a moment, that mom wanted to hit her.'"


• Improbability (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have-Now Springtime Fresh), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "'THE GODS HAVE FORSAKEN US!' Angela Li screamed into the PA system as pandemonium consumed Lawndale High."


• Little Green Cap, by peetz5050 (part 4): "'Well... at least I can discuss discussing the... issue... if that makes any sense. I know what happened to me, I remember it... but... I don't dwell on it. When I let it I see... faces... and feel...' Her breathing was becoming labored and she was tensing up as she spoke, her knuckles whitening on her clenched fists."


• Misery Chick No More (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Monday, Monday), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Daria was frozen in sheer horror at what stood on her doorstep, spinkles of soil fell off the slightly decomposed figure as he stared at her with his dead and yet horribly animated eyes."


• Operation Glitterberries, by BF110C4 (part 19): "About the only things that gave the room the feeling of being lived in rather than holding someone there were the different posters pinned to the walls, even if they were as morbid as the rest of the room, with ‘Kafka’s Metamorphosis’ sharing a wall with an old poster of a half dug skeleton from an archaeological site; incongruously there was a white sock incongruently sewed to the wall. The models of a realistic human heart and a piece of cheese from all the possible things completed the look."


• Quinn and Her Little Brother (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Monday, Monday), by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "Quinn glared at the sleeping infant in it's cradle, the mere existence of a baby brother was enough to make the world seem like a cruel, dark place."


• Sexy Daria: Sex and the Mall, by Shiva (COMPLETE!): "And now that she had spotted him by himself in the hallway, it was moment of truth time. Once she had caught his eye, his gorgeous sapphire blue eyes, all those rehearsed lines flew out the window and she was forced to improvise. 'Uh... Hi Ronnie.' Scarlett said lamely, it was the best she could do with short notice."



• Toilet Humor (IC: Hell is Crossed People), by GlitterShrooms (COMPLETE!): "It was hard for her to breathe. Admittedly, she had always thought before that Highland was a living Hell, but now...Now she realized what Hell truly was. Daria sat back down on the floor. Of all the places there was for her to die, it was going to be in the bathroom in the teachers' lounge. And of all the ways to die, it would be at the hand of those monsters. Why didn't she just give up and die while she had the chance?"


• Unnamed story (IC: How did Daria end up in Hot Topic's Torture Room?), by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked suspiciously at the outfit that Trent was holding in his hands. 'You want me to try that on?'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Monday, Monday), by LadieT (COMPLETE!): "Daria looked over at Quinn. 'Now let me get this straight, you were walking home from the mall when he offered you a ride home?'"


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Monday, Monday), by Roentgen (COMPLETE!): "It was 11:30 pm, and Daria was finally finished with her history paper on the Constitution. With that out of the way, she could turn to her secret passion - RPF, or 'real person fiction'."


• Unnamed story (Scenes no Daria Fanfic should ever have: Monday, Monday), by thatLONERchick (COMPLETE!): "Charles turned to the waiting crowd, grinning. 'What lucky lady is next in line for Monsieur Charles and his Magic Fingers?'"